A Life Kept Simple (DxD/Hentai Chaos Gacha OC-SI) — Chapter 28 (Patreon)

I glance towards Ibaraki as she inhales a not-insignificant portion of our lunchtime sandwiches the maids wheeled out to the garden. We had most of them in the parlour, but still hadn’t managed to eat everything between the twelve of us non-oni. She’s sitting cross-legged beneath one of the trees with Sir Blob sprawled across her lap, tearing strips off what has to be her fourth sandwich.

Miyata’s sitting a healthy distance away from her. Apparently, being challenged to a fight within thirty seconds of becoming a werewolf has taught him caution. Murata sits beside him, still occasionally glaring at the Ring of Hircine on his finger.

“...C’mon, man. Best of three!”

“No.”

“You got lucky.”

“And you said no hard feelings.”

“Well, I lied!”

Tajima snorts from where he’s lying back on the grass with his hands behind his head. Seto and Sasaki are sitting nearby, picking at what’s left of lunch away from Ibaraki. It’s still weird seeing all five of them here.

“Arima!”

I look over.

Leona has claimed one of the garden chairs beneath a parasol and somehow managed to make sitting outside look aristocratic. Saki’s there with Mary at that same table, while Kyouka has forgone the chair-parasol combo entirely and is lying across the grass on her stomach.

“What?”

Leona gestures towards the empty plates scattered across the table. “Are we beginning today, or were you planning to digest for another hour?”

Behind her, Hayami gathers a stack of papers she’d brought outside with her and rises. “I’ll leave you to it.”

“...Eh?” Ria looks up. “You’re going?”

“We have work.”

The expression on Hayami’s face makes it very clear that ‘we’ includes Ria, as the brown-haired girl scrambles to her feet.

“O-Oh! Right!”

“You don’t wanna stay?” Mary asks.

“No.”

Hayami doesn’t even hesitate in walking away and Ria gives us an apologetic little bow before hurrying after her. I watch them disappear towards the mansion.

“...We can’t have been that bad, right?”

“She tolerates you,” Leona says. “Hayami isn’t a people person at the best of times.”

I blink. “Well, you’ll have to forgive me. I don’t exactly have the most normal first impression of her.”

“What, you mean the one where you fucked her to sleep?” a voice calls out of nowhere.

The mansion’s rear doors open as four girls spill out onto the veranda. I recognise Darlia first. The little glimmers in her eyes that I can see through her hair intensify once she spots the line of guys sitting across the grass. Eunji follows her out. Of course, they’re all clad in clothes that’d see them put in porno mags or worse, which naturally draws the boys’ gaze towards them like moths to a flame.

Darlia smiles. “Well, aren’t you all cute~?”

Five spines straighten to varying degrees.

Murata blushes. “...Why are they looking at us like that?”

“L-Like what?” Miyata asks, equally red-faced.

“Like that.”

Darlia strolls closer. “Leona, you never told us you were having boys over.”

“Hmph! I was under no obligation to.”

“Are these Arima’s friends?”

“Unfortunately,” Leona says.

Eunji giggles behind her hand. “Can we expect a similar level of performance?”

I lurch back as Murata grabs me by the scruff of my shirt.

“...Dude,” he hisses in my ear. “You fucked them?!”

“It’s a long story that I don’t think I have the time to tell,” I mumble. “If you wanna have sex with ‘em, they owe me, so they’ll do it for free. But uh… maybe delay it, yeah?”

Tajima sits up slowly, while the rest of the guys look away from me as they no doubt make up their minds. I dunno. Maybe they are looking at me, but this shit’s so awkward I’m staring at a particularly malformed cloud right now.

Darlia crouches in front of Seto, who’s picking at the grass between his legs. “What’s your name?”

“S-Seto.”

“Seto. You’re adorable! That look on your face makes me want to gobble you right up~!” she says with a grin. “D’you have a girlfriend?”

Murata makes the fatal mistake of laughing, reeling Eunji in towards him before he can take another breath.

“How about you?” she asks with a giggle. “You look rough. I bet you get into fights all the time!”

His laughter dies. “...How did you know?”

Kyouka starts laughing way too loud.

Ibaraki watches the entire exchange with increasing confusion as she plods towards me. “Do these women wish to mate with them?”

I choke. “Ibaraki!”

“What?” Her brow furrows. “They approach, display interest, and make the males nervous. Yet they do nothing.”

Darlia bursts out laughing.

I rub both hands down my face. “They’re half-serious, I think. Mostly, they’re winding them up.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s funny.”

Ibaraki looks back. “...So they don’t wish to mate?”

“I don’t fucking know, Ibaraki.”

“You should ask.”

“I’m not asking. How about you ask, huh?”

She smirks. “Coward.”

“You’re damn right. Now, can we please get back to the supernatural shit?!”

Saki giggles. It bursts out of her lightning-quick before she clamps a hand over her mouth. Mary gives her shoulder a little nudge, laughing as well. She lets the hand fall, revealing the embarrassed smile on her face.

“Alright.” I push myself to my feet and clap my hands. “Show’s over. We’ve got an actual reason for being out here.”

There are a few disappointed noises from the girls.

“Yeah, yeah. Go terrorise somebody else.”

“We weren’t terrorising them,” Darlia says innocently. “For all you know, we might have taster sessions planned with these lovelies!”

“Which I don’t want to know about. Now stop terrorising me.”

I ignore them and look towards Saki. Her smile fades slightly when she realises everyone’s attention has shifted towards her now that Darlia and Eunji are gone. She brushes off her skirt and gets up.

“So… how are we going to figure this out?”

“That,” I say, “is an excellent question. Leona?”

“What?” She blinks.

“You’ve been studying magic. Wanna give it a shot first?”

“What about Mary?”

My girlfriend giggles. “Give it a go! You wanna be my Queen, try some independence~!”

We’re mostly messing with her, but a surefire way to get Leona to do what you want is to push the girl’s pride button. Because, whoa boy. What she lacks in proportions, she makes up for with boatloads of aplomb.

Ibaraki raises her hand. “I suggest we hit her. Perhaps with my oni-fire?”

“No,” I say without missing a beat.

Her hand lowers.

“Okay. Let’s start with what we actually know. Yesterday, something appeared over your skin when you were...”

“When I was upset,” Saki finishes quietly. She looks down at her arm. “It looked like another layer of skin.”

The sacred gear is surprisingly easy for her to summon up. Maybe because the event itself happened less than a day ago, or because the emotions themselves are still fresh?

I squint at the sacred gear. “It’s almost covering you, but… not?”

Leona’s expression changes as she gets up. “Hm.”

Saki stiffens as Leona circles her once, tapping a finger against her chin.

“A layer covering the body...” she murmurs. Her eyes flick back towards Saki. “Second Skin!”

Saki blinks. “What?”

“If we don’t know what your sacred gear is called, then we’ll need something to call it while we investigate. Second Skin.”

Saki looks down at herself again. “Second Skin,” she repeats.

A small smile creeps onto her face.

“I like it.”

Leona immediately looks unbearably pleased with herself as she juts her chin out. “Of course you do!”

“…Second Skin it is,” I say. “Now we just need to figure out what the hell it even does. Something I asked you to start with. You’re not distracting me with the cool name, Leona.”

She flushes slightly, stamping her foot into the grass. “Y-You can’t even thank me for a job well-done, you oaf!”

“You seriously called me an oaf in 2008?”

Most of us at least hold in our laughter. Aside from Ibaraki, who probably finds nothing funny about this. Murata and Miyata don’t even try to hide their snickering.

Leona’s eye twitches. “Fine! If you insist on being so impatient, we’ll start with the obvious. It first appeared yesterday, correct?”

Saki nods.

“And you can bring it out whenever you want now?”

“I think so.”

“Make it disappear.”

The translucent layer vanishes.

“Again.”

It returns a second later.

“Again.”

Saki gives Leona a slightly confused look but does as she’s told, turning it off and on, and then off again, though nothing else changes. I pay attention to her with my sixth sense while she does. Activating the sacred gear doesn’t lead to any boost in her latent magical power or her life force. She doesn’t seem any stronger when Mary has her squeeze her hand either. So then what the fuck does it actually do?

We step back from the tests and spend some time studying the sacred gear itself, physically I mean. The layer itself isn’t physical even if it appears to be. If I want to, I can—and have—put my hand on Saki’s shoulder without meeting any resistance from it whatsoever. The same goes for anything physical. It all passes straight through Second Skin and affects Saki normally.

So, it’s clearly not armour, killing Leona’s first theory.

“Hmph.”

I pat her shoulder. “Don’t look so upset.”

“I am not upset.”

I refrain from pointing out that her posture says otherwise as she turns away from me and marches back to the parasol-shrouded table. Pretty soon, we start deliberately exposing Saki to things. A little demonic power from Mary, followed by me waterbending water from a nearby jug around Saki’s arm for a while. Nothing happens, so I send the water back for a bit to collect my thoughts. Ibaraki suggests poison during the interim, and then her oni-fire once again.

Both swiftly rejected.

“Wait,” Sasaki says eventually. “What if we’re not doing enough?”

I look over. He’s sitting with his legs crossed a few metres away, watching Saki hold an ice cube against her bare forearm.

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“Well...” He scratches his cheek. “We’re moving on a little too fast? If we’re gonna deal with hot and cold stuff, shouldn’t we let it sit there for a bit?”

Mary leans forward in her chair. “Like a certain amount?”

“Maybe…”

“Or a threshold?” Saki says. She glances between us before lifting the half-melted ice cube. “Could I just... keep going?”

I shrug. “Sure. Not like we have anything else right now.”

Saki presses it back against her arm for a while. I bring back the water from the jug near the backdoors, partitioning a bit to freeze into more ice cubes. There’s no reason to be stupid about it, though. We just stop till it starts to hurt, let her warm up, then go again.

“Whoa, wait.” I lean closer after a few minutes. There’s a crack running down the bit of Second Skin wrapped around her forearm.

Saki spots it. “...It’s cracking.”

Leona shoots out of her chair. “Don’t stop!”

“I wasn’t going to!”

We ditch the ice cubes and ask a passing maid to get us a bowl, filling it with cold water and ice. Saki starts dipping her hand in for as long as she’s comfortable before pulling it back out. By this point, everyone has crowded around the table, including Ibaraki and Sir Blob.

Saki pulls her hand out again. A translucent strip peels away from her index finger and fades into the air. Another curls away from her palm. It looks disturbingly like she’s shedding skin without actually shedding any skin, and underneath, her hand is changing. There’s a faint flush to it, red creeping into her fingers as more of Second Skin peels away.

“Saki. Your hand’s really warm.” Mary pulls away from her slightly as she touches the limb with her other hand.

“...Oh.”

The last piece peels away, exposing her hand up to the wrist as an almost raw red. Steam wisps off the limb. Saki looks down at the bowl with a focused expression on her face and sticks her hand straight back in.

“Saki—” Mary flinches.

“It’s fine!” she says giddily, leaving the hand in there for almost twenty seconds. Saki grins. “I can’t feel it!”

Mary blinks. “The water?”

“The cold.” Saki starts moving her hand through the ice water, knocking the cubes aside with the back of her hand. “I can feel the water. And the ice cubes touching me. It’s just not cold anymore.”

Wait… is the ice around her hand melting? It’s not fast, but they seem smaller than they were thirty seconds ago for certain.

Leona gets there at about the same time I do. “It adapted. Second Skin is all about adaptation!”

“Does it work on the rest of you?” Seto leans over the bowl. He reaches into the bowl, fishes out one of the rapidly shrinking ice cubes and holds it up. “Try your other hand.”

“I… don’t know?” Saki pauses, blushing a little at the almost face-to-face contact they have, though Seto doesn’t seem to notice as he presses the cube to her forearm.

She immediately sucks air through her teeth. “Cold!”

“So only the bit that changed,” Seto says with a bright smile. “This is awesome!”

Saki’s blush intensifies.

“And Second Skin’s still everywhere else,” Sasaki adds. Her red-hot adapted hand sticks out rather starkly against the translucent layer still covering everything past her wrist.

Tajima finally gets up from the grass and walks over. “Here’s a question no one’s thought to ask: how long does the adaptation last?”

“Everyone’s a scientist today,” Mary says with a giggle. “Well, if other sacred gears are anything to go by, I’d guess and say however long she can keep it up. It’s probably dipping into her magical energy reserves. The better question is what activates it? Is it just time under tension, or intensity?”

“Time under tension,” I repeat slowly. “...You’ve been listening to my phone calls to these guys, haven’t you?”

I’ve been giving them some gym advice, since every single one of the boys without exception has been pumping iron from the moment I gave them Hanma on account of my regimen. In fact, Miyata took his desire to get back to boxing even further and enrolled in MMA.

Mary smiles sheepishly. “Maybe. But am I wrong?”

“It’s a good question.” Tajima shrugs. “Seems obvious.”

Saki chooses to dispel it on her own and the limb returns to normal easily. Second Skin crawls back over it like nothing ever happened. The red fades, and sticking her hand back into the bowl gets an immediate hiss out of her. I crank up the chill, which is mean of me, but Saki not wrenching her hand out shows that she’s curious about her sacred gear, too. The same adaptation appears noticeably faster, which leads us to conclude that it’s a bit of both. Maybe it’d be possible for her to adapt instantly if the stimulus is strong enough… provided she can withstand it first.

I’m guessing getting knocked out means no adaptation, though.

After the cold, we move on to heat. The same maid from earlier brings us increasingly hot water. Saki works her hand through it until Second Skin starts cracking again. This time, the skin underneath comes out pale enough to look almost bloodless and so cold enough that condensation forms against it. Saki dispels the adaptation once everyone starts throwing ideas around.

Tajima is considerably less interested in what we can make Saki adapt to than what actually counts as the same thing. “If she’s immune to heat now, does that mean fire can’t burn her?”

“No idea.”

Seto perks up. “What about something hot hitting her?”

“That’d still hit her,” Sasaki says. “The ice didn’t stop touching her before.”

Tajima nods. “That’s what I mean. If someone heated up a rock and threw it at her, would she be immune to the heat but still get hit by the rock?”

Murata and Miyata, rather than add anything, seem happy to ooh and ah at whatever adaptations we get out of her as the next hour turns into a weird combination of supernatural research and us trying to think of increasingly specific ways to poke holes in our own conclusions.

Mary’s demonic power is the first interesting failure. She keeps a small amount running over Saki’s hand, gradually increasing it whenever Saki says she’s fine because it’s got a generally foreboding feeling. But after ten minutes, it’s clear to all of us that Second Skin doesn’t give a shit.

“Maybe it can’t adapt to pure magical energy?” Mary asks.

Sasaki scratches his cheek. “Maybe the energy itself isn’t actually doing anything to her besides the creepy feeling, so there’s nothing to adapt to? The cold made her cold. The hot water made her hot, you know?”

Mary looks down at her hand.

“Want to try some magic, then?” I ask both the girls.

“So it’s not conceptual,” Seto mumbles. “Good to know.”

Leona looks towards him. “Conceptual?”

“It doesn’t care that something is demonic power or magic or whatever. It cares about what the thing actually does to her.”

That… is a little heartening. If Second Skin could just get exposed to the vague concept of ’magic’ and decide Saki’s immune to fucking magic now, we’d have discovered one of the most broken sacred gears on the planet, which wouldn’t bode well for her or me.

Tajima folds his arms. “So if her magic burned Saki...”

“Then she’d probably adapt to the burning,” Sasaki finishes.

“Not the magic,” Leona says uncertainly.

I nod. “That’s my best guess.”

Ibaraki, who has been remarkably patient for someone who’s spent the past hour lobbying to set a teenage girl on fire, immediately perks up.

“Then we shall test my flames.”

“No.”

She stares at me.

“Okay, fine...” Her grin is immediate. I jab my finger against her upper chest. She’s decked out in my tank top and some baggy pants Mary bought for her. “Controlled! Very controlled.”

Ibaraki’s smile slowly drops. “...Hmph. As if I’d be nothing less than an exemplary oni!”

She doesn’t get that’s exactly what I’m worried about. I watch Mary walk up to her and, by the looks of it, give Ibaraki a few encouraging words before we move back to the table and let Ibaraki and Saki walk further out.

“You know you don’t have to do this, right!” Seto calls through his cupped hands.

Saki gives him a trembling smile as she holds her hand out. Ibaraki crouches a few feet away. A tiny orange flame flickers into existence above her fingertip.

“Smaller.”

The flame shrinks.

“Smaller.”

Mary sighs. “Seriously, babe?”

“She’s putting her hand in it!”

“Well, at least I know you’ll be an amazing dad~!”

I turn to her amidst the jeering from Murata and Miyata, feeling my face grow hot. “A-Are you seriously throwing me off—oh, you gremlin!”

She successfully distracts me long enough for Ibaraki to deploy her oni-fire against Saki’s sacred gear. Saki pulls away whenever it gets too much, waits, then puts her hand back.

“It’s changing,” Seto says. “I think.”

The adaptation creeps out from beneath the peeling layer in thin streaks, spreading over Saki’s hand until the last translucent scraps disappear. Hoarfrost crawls across her fingers. Her mouth falls open as she gawks at the little clouds of white around her palm.

“Whoa…”

The frost moves with her fingers as she flexes them.

Ibaraki’s eyes light up. “Again!”

Saki sticks her hand back into the flame. The oni-fire still touches her. Still curls around her fingers. Then Saki jerks her hand back and instinctively flicks it at the wrist. Three shards of ice shoot across the garden and embed themselves in a tree.

“Do it again,” Murata says.

She looks down at her hand where another little patch of frost gathers over her palm. Five minutes later, she’s still throwing ice. Bear in mind the entirety of Second Skin hasn’t peeled off either. It’s just the bit around her palms. How much stronger would she be if she could adapt entirely?

…Though it’s probably not safe to test at the minute. Since she can’t enhance herself with magical energy or tap into her magical energy, all Ibaraki’s oni-fire would do is burn her faster than she can adapt to. But hey, at least we know how the sacred gear works now. It’s adapting her to whatever she’s dealing with using the opposite of it, and apparently that can come with abilities of its own.

Saki is having the time of her fucking life as we call out targets for her. Seto and Sasaki start lining empty plastic cups up on the grass for her to hit. Tajima stands them back up whenever she misses badly enough to knock several over at once. Even Murata and Miyata eventually stop arguing about the ring long enough to start calling shots.

“Far left!” Murata calls.

Saki throws.

Ibaraki cackles. “Not even close!”

She throws another one but misses because she’s laughing too hard. Eventually, though, the blue drains out of her hand. Saki’s final attempt produces a pathetic puff of frost that dies about two inches from her palm. Then Second Skin returns, and she sways on her feet. Ibaraki catches her by the shoulder with a bright smile on her face.

“That’s quite the wondrous ability you possess, human!”

Saki smiles up at her. “T-Thank you.”

Mary’s already beside her. “You’re tired.”

“No, I—” Saki cuts her retort off midway. “...I’m a little tired.”

“Then we’re done,” I say.

I think we’ve learned enough for one afternoon, anyway. Second Skin adapts after enough exposure. The amount matters. It only adapts to something actually affecting Saki rather than whatever supernatural category that thing happens to belong to. The adaptation takes the form of something opposed to whatever triggered it. It lasts around ten minutes at her current level, give or take, and apparently leaves her knackered afterwards.

That’s plenty to work with for the handful of weeks left till the Young Devil Gathering. More importantly, Saki’s the happiest I’ve seen her as she tries to convince Seto that she could’ve hit the glass if Murata hadn’t distracted her with his jeering.

“Alright!” Mary claps her hands. “Inside?”

The others start filtering back towards the mansion. Tajima grabs the empty glasses. Seto goes after Saki when she forgets one beside the tree, while Sasaki hangs back long enough to help one of the maids gather the bowls. As for me… well, I take about three steps before almost running over Sir Blob.

I pick him up with a chuckle. “Well, what about you, buddy? You wanna join my Covenant, too? I’m sure there’s room for you!”

The kaleidoscopic screen that bursts into existence between us nearly makes me drop Sir Blob in shock.

Feat: Reach 10 Members of Your Covenant!

+1x Silver Item Gacha Ticket

An influx of feats flash across the screen following it, too, but I’m more surprised Sir Blob can understand me that clearly.

“Shit. It’s good to know there’s someone home in there,” I mutter as I set the cat down. “Or something anyway…”

He scampers after Ibaraki.

Feat: Peel Back That Second Skin and Break That Butterfly Out of Her Shell!

+1x Gold Item Gacha Ticket

Feat: No Girls Allowedn’t!

+1x Bronze Random Gacha Ticket

…Do I feel bad that the only thing on my mind after the influx of these tickets is rolling the damn things? Fuck no. As lovely as this day with my friends has been—no longer having to hide or tone down bits of myself as much as I can—I’ve been waiting for this. Not just because of the tiny Gacha addict in me… but well, I can roll shit to help them out in this coming gathering, too.

Or at least, I hope I can. RNGesus take the wheel!

I’m inside a ridiculously opulent ground-floor bathroom, across from a mirror a little wider than my wingspan and outfitted with a state-of-the-art Japanese toilet, among other things, like a shower.

“...Right, bronze first,” I mutter as I rip the ticket in two.

Item: Asauchi [Uncommon]

Bleach - An asauchi is a Zanpakuto, a spiritual armament in the form of a weapon that befits its user. The strength of this armament scales with the power of its user. Asauchi refers specifically to dormant, unnamed Zanpakuto. Through Jinzen, the user impresses their soul upon the blade, communing with the spirit within. Eventually, they may attain Shikai, allowing them to acquire a unique ability equal to or weaker in power than a Rare rank ability. If they are able to reach the realm of Bankai, that ability will be upgraded to an Epic rank ability.

I barely even have time to read half the summary before a sheathed katana falls into my lap. Turning it over in my hands, I feel a little jealous about giving it away, but if I’m being honest, keeping it as I am now would be selfish. I’ve got enough avenues of growth open to me when compared to my friends.

But man, had I got this before Riptide, it’d be another story. Tossing the asauchi into my inventory, I take out the silver ticket this time and wet my lips in anticipation. The glitching rainbow-coloured screen lights my face once more.

Item: Ring of the Paladin [Elite]

An enchanted ring worn by a legendary paladin, now infused with his prayers. This ring can hold a total of 3 charges and recovers a charge every hour, though this cost can be supplemented by expending energy instead. You can spend a charge to cast a Rare tier Heal on yourself or a target, grant a target any blessing that is Rare tier or below. You can also bless an object with holy energy to either create holy water or a temporarily blessed weapon effective against the unholy.

I whistle. “Goddamn. …No pun intended, of course.”

I’d rather not keep this on me either, to be honest. There’s already enough confusion with my demigod-ness and that blessing with Hera… ugh. I really should go about removing it in the least offensive way possible. Maybe there’s a Gacha roll for that? Almost reverently, I lift the final and most high-tier ticket to my face. Honestly, I won’t be mad if my shit luck kicks in this time after the rolls I’ve had, but for once… I think I believe in the heart of the cards.

Or the Gacha, as it were.

“RNGesus, buddy,” I mutter. “This one’s for you.”

I close my eyes and tear the ticket, only opening them after three full seconds have passed.

Item: Lionel [Elite]

Akame ga Kill - Dubbed the "King of Beasts Transformation", the Lionel is a Teigu in the form of a belt. It allows the user to take on the form of a human-lion hybrid, granting increased physical abilities and sharpened senses. In addition, Lionel gives the user exceptional vitality and regenerative power, allowing them to regrow their eyes and even reattach limbs as long as they have the requisite stamina. As this item is a Teigu, it is difficult to master and can only be used by people who are compatible with it; Lionel specifically seems to prefer free-spirited busty women.

I stare at the last sentence in particular for a few moments. Free-spirited busty women. My mind goes to one girl immediately right as the Gacha spits the belt out into my hands. Holy fucking shit!

I turn the belt over in my hands, staring at it with an entirely different level of appreciation now. I didn’t recognise the name at first, but how the fuck could I forget this thing? Leone could turn into a really hot lion woman with it. Super strength, speed, senses, regeneration—

Really fucking good regeneration. My excitement dims a little at the reminder of exactly how I know that. Akame ga Kill, the show where everyone dies, including the main character. I haven’t thought about it in years, but I remember enough. Mostly that getting attached to anybody was a fantastic way to ruin your week.

Still… this thing is really fucking good. Maybe not for me. The compatibility requirement alone will tell me to go fuck myself, because Lionel has a type and I know exactly who needs it the most, too. I toss Lionel into my inventory with the other two items, wash my hands, take one last look at myself in the unnecessarily massive mirror and grin. Knowing that I pulled an asauchi, a healing ring, and fucking Lionel is definitely going straight to my head.

The grin lasts until I reach the parlour, of course, and come into contact with five entirely new demonic signatures.

My face falls. “...You guys seriously did it without me?”

Kyouka, Leona, Murata, Miyata, and Seto sit there, newly reincarnated devils of the Naamah peerage. That leaves Sasaki, Tajima, and Saki as the only humans in the room besides me. By the looks of things, Hayami and Ria decided to abstain from both the Covenant and Mary’s peerage.

I sigh. “...Alright, what are your pieces?”

“Knight,” Murata says.

Miyata salutes me. “Rook.”

“Bishop,” Seto says with a smile.

Leona stands and puffs her chest out. “Why the Queen, of course!”

“Pawn,” Kyouka says. “But apparently I get to promote into anything, so maybe I’m the strongest piece ever!”

Mary looks entirely too pleased with herself in the midst of her peerage.

“I still can’t believe this. I was gone for ten minutes max!”

“Closer to fifteen,” Kyouka says with a snort. “Was Eunji blowing you in that bathroom or something?”

Murata looks at me like he’s seeing me for the first time… I don’t think I like that look either.

“No,” I say firmly. “She wasn’t. Nobody was.”

“Ah, so you were fucking someone!”

“I—”

Tajima and Sasaki laugh at my expense from the other side of the room, while Saki sits there fighting her smile.

“...Goddamnit, Kyouka. I guess you don’t want your gift, then.”

“I was joking.”

“Didn’t sound like it.”

“Arima.”

I turn away.

She shoots to her feet. “Arima, my dear and treasured friend whose cock I enjoy very much!”

Murata sticks his fingers into his mouth and whistles loud and sharp.

“Whoa, whoa!” Miyata shouts, crossing his arms. “That’s a foul. Red card!”

She flips them off and beams at me. “What did you get me?”

I head back out because these gifts aren’t the sort I can remove by putting a hand behind my back without anyone noticing. So I come back through the door with an asauchi tucked under one arm, the Ring of the Paladin on my finger, and the teigu belt dangling from my fingers.

Kyouka’s eyes land on the belt. “What is that?”

“Yours.” I toss it.

“Whoa!”

She barely catches Lionel against her chest.

“Put it on and see what happens.”

Her eyes light up as she stands and fastens the belt around her waist. The moment it’s on, a vaguely translucent lion superimposes itself over her and quickly morphs into sweltering flames that surge up her torso.

The fire disappears a moment later.

Two furry ears now poke out through Kyouka’s hair, coloured the same shade. They twitch at the sound of my voice. Her hands have changed too. Fur runs from her fingers halfway up her forearms, ending in a pair of oversized five-fingered paws tipped with black claws. And her eyes are a burning shade of orange.

“...Kyouka? Your eyes are fucking glowing. It’s really cool, just saying,” Murata gushes.

“Eh?” Kyouka raises her hands in front of her face. “...Holy shit.” The claws slide out further when she flexes her fingers. “Holy shit!” Her hands immediately shoot to the top of her head. One of her new ears folds beneath her palm. “I can feel that!”

I snort. “Well, yeah. They’re ears.”

“No, dumbass, I can feel them!” She grabs both. They flatten against her head before springing back up the second she lets go. “Look! Look!”

“I’m looking,” I say dryly.

“I’m a fucking cat out of some hentai!”

“Lion, actually.”

“Same shit!”

I’m pretty sure Sir Blob makes an offended noise from his perch at Ibaraki’s feet. Kyouka spots her reflection in one of the windows and practically launches herself towards it. Only, she overshoots the window completely and slams shoulder-first into the wall on the other side of the room to avoid going straight through glass instead.

She slowly pushes herself up. “Ow.”

Lionel boosts physical ability. Obviously, I knew that from the description, but fucking hell. As a reincarnated Pawn, she wasn’t exactly weak to begin with. At my estimate, and this is rough, she’s pretty strong. Stronger than Werewolf Miyata was… though I reckon he’s probably stronger than her now. I’d struggle to say high-class, though. Mary’s not exactly a weaker high-class devil, and she’s a bit stronger than they are.

A grin spreads across Kyouka’s face. She crouches.

Leona frowns. “Don’t you fucking—”

She vanishes.

“SHIRAISHI!” She shrieks as a table nearly goes flying and I put my face in my hands.

...Maybe giving her Lionel was a bad idea. After a couple of seconds of pandemonium, I stop her from going through the ceiling and force her to sit down with the threat of rescinding my gift. The idle threat buys a moment to think about who I’m giving this to.

“Okay, Sasaki? This is a sword that grows with you. Right now it’s no better than a regular katana, but you’re supposed to meditate with it and imprint yourself onto it. Eventually it’ll grow a conscience and unlock whatever ability it develops specifically for you. Catch!”

His eyes go straight back down to the sword. I don’t think he expected to get anything today, but out of all my friends, aside from Tajima, he’s the one I’d trust with a bladed weapon. And well… I’ve got something different planned for Tajima. If the boys want him to play Tank, then I might as well give him a decent tanker buff.

“Tajima?” He looks up at my call. “This ring has three charges. Each charge has an hour recovery time, but you can brute-force it by feeding the ring some magical energy. You can use the charges to heal people, temporarily make somebody stronger or faster, or bless stuff. Like holy water or blessed weapons.”

He slides the ring onto his index finger. “Holy as in anti-devil?”

“Yep.”

He glances towards the three newly minted devils.

Murata immediately points at him. “Don’t.”

“...I didn’t do anything,” he says flatly.

“But you thought about it. I know you did! I’ve known you since middle school, man! Bad thoughts, dude. Bad thoughts!”

I glance around the room to gauge everyone else’s reactions, but one person in particular catches my eye. When I look towards her, she breaks eye contact immediately with a hilarious harrumph.

“You’re seriously pouting, Leona?” I ask, smiling.

“I am doing no such thing.”

“You absolutely are, but don’t worry. Santa’s got some stuff for the rest of you, too. Except Mary, because she’s got her own cool abilities.”

Mary hangs her head. “Aww.”

“I’m kidding!”

She looks up immediately with an impish smile. …Damn. That’s the second time she’s got me with some bullshit today.

“Leona, you know how I can heal people through certain acts?”

Her face immediately colours.

“You can do that, but it’s not as effective, so you’ll have to do it more, or reach a higher… crescendo, if you catch my drift.”

Leona’s face gets redder, but I move on before Kyouka can smack her with the jab I know is forming on the tip of her tongue and make this a whole fucking thing.

“Murata, you get stronger when you’re fighting someone one-on-one.”

“How much stronger?” he asks, turning to face me fully.

“A decent bit. The catch is that if somebody else jumps in, the boost disappears. People should also be less inclined to interrupt you once you’re actually fighting someone.”

Murata slowly grins. “Oh, that’s sick.”

“Yeah, figured you’d like it.”

“And you can store shit.” I point at Seto.

He blinks behind his glasses. “...What?”

“You know the inventories in MMOs? You’ve got one. But the weight limit’s basically whatever you’d normally be capable of carrying.”

“Wait, wait, how come we don’t get inventories?” Miyata whines. “That shit is useful. Sasaki got a fucking Zanpakuto!”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” I say with a grin on my face. “If the werewolf ring isn’t enough, I’m sure Murata wouldn’t mind taking it off your hands.”

He grins. “Not one bit!”

“...Nevermind!” Miyata says quickly.

I look towards the remaining three. Mary might be a member of the Covenant but she already has Pneumancy. Ibaraki already has her own powers and isn’t a member, though she doesn’t seem to care about much beyond the macaroons on the coffee table.

“Um.” Saki’s sitting beside Mary with both hands wrapped around her glass of juice.

“Yeah?”

Saki glances down at her drink as the room goes quiet. “I... could I join?”

I blink. “The Covenant?”

“And... your peerage.” She looks towards Mary. “I-I don’t mean because everyone got something! That’s not why I asked. I mean, the abilities are amazing, obviously, but—I just...”

She squeezes the glass and her gaze falls again.

“You’ve done so much for me. Since yesterday. More than... you had to. B-Both of you. And everyone here has been really nice to me today, and I want to pay that back somehow.”

Mary’s expression softens.

“I know I can’t do much right now, but I have Second Skin, and I can learn magic eventually, and I could help with the Covenant, or your peerage, or—”

“Saki.” She smiles at her. “Ask me again tomorrow morning.”

Saki’s expression drops. “Oh.”

“That’s not a no. But you’ve had a really fun afternoon, yeah. You’ve made new friends, figured out your sacred gear, and you’re really riding that high right now. So have breakfast with us tomorrow. If you still want to become a devil afterwards, ask me again and I’d be happy to reincarnate you.”

Saki stares at her for a few seconds before slowly nodding. “Okay.”

Her eyes drift towards me.

“Same answer,” I say with a smile. “We’re not going anywhere.”

“Now!” Mary gets up and dusts her hands. “Takezo and I shall return… I just need to talk to him real quick~!”

There’s a level of pomp in her voice that’s just intimidating, but everyone’s so absorbed in their own gifts that me—the gift-giver—might as well not exist anymore. And then there’s Ibaraki and Sir Blob laying waste to the snacks in between everyone. She takes me by the arm before I can ask what about and drags me out of the parlour. Mary leads me down the hall and opens the first empty room she finds. Some kind of little study, by the looks of it.

She waits until I’m inside and locks the door shut.

“Okay.” I turn around. “What’s up?”

She leans against the desk. “...Where do you keep getting this stuff?”

…Ah. That.

“Because I’ve kinda been wondering for a while. You had the cloak and the doll that cleans your house. Then you suddenly had a ring that turns Miyata into a werewolf, and now you’ve disappeared into a bathroom and come back with three completely different magical artefacts. I’m pretty sure at least one of those is a sacred gear and the other is some kind of Church artefact!”

“Well, when you put it like that.”

“Takezo.”

“Okay, okay…”

Reading the tea leaves… I knew this was coming eventually. Honestly, I’m surprised it took her this long. I’ve barely even been trying to hide the Gacha lately. At this point I’m just pulling random magical bullshit out of thin air and expecting her to roll with it. Everyone in the parlour doesn’t know any better, though I bet they’ll start suspecting me too at some point, just like Mary is right now.

Oh, she’s been rolling with it for months, but there’s rolling with it and then there’s what happened today.

“...I have a sacred gear thing sort of,” I say slowly. “It’s like a gacha game. You know those mobile games where you use in-game tickets to pull stuff?”

She nods.

“It’s kind of like that. I don’t know what it is except that it gives me tickets for things it deems as achievements, basically. Sometimes they’re really specific. But I tear a ticket—and those vary in rarity based on the achievement—and get something random in return.”

Mary stares at me. “Random?”

“Completely. Items, abilities, traits, and familiars…”

“Ibaraki?” She frowns. “Is she—”

“Yep. She’s the only other person who knows.”

Mary gawks at me.

“And the Covenant’s part of it too,” I add. “It lets me give weaker versions of stuff I’ve rolled to my members. That’s where Leona, Murata, and Seto’s new abilities came from. And yours, too. You’ve been a martial arts prodigy since this morning, by the way. Congrats.”

“So this thing… it’s the cause of all your powers?” she asks.  “And nobody else knows aside from Ibaraki? Not Serafall?”

“Especially not her.”

Mary snorts and I smile a little, even if it dies when she keeps looking at me.

“...Are you mad that I kept it hidden from you?” I ask.

She shakes her head. “I’m a little annoyed you didn’t tell me sooner, but I understand why. It’s a crazy ability. If my father knew, he’d try something crazy like suggesting I get pregnant so… o-our kids have the ability, too.”

“Unfortunately, I don’t think it’s inheritable,” I say with a weak laugh, unsure if the Chaos Gacha works that way.

Mary pushes herself away from the desk and slips her arms around me. She rests her chin against my chest. “You’ve known me for a few months, Takezo. This thing sounds like one of your biggest secrets. Probably the biggest, and I’m happy you chose to tell me about it.”

I relax. “Well, I can say this went a lot better than I expected.”

“...What did you think I was going to do?”

“Be pissed?”

“I can still be pissed if you want!”

My hands wrap around the small of her back. “Nah, I’m good.”

She giggles and rises onto her toes, kissing me. I return it without thinking, relieved beyond all belief.

I pull away eventually. “...C’mon. Before Kyouka destroys something too expensive.”

“That’s Leona’s problem.”

My hand barely reaches the handle before Mary grabs my arm and turns me around, pinning me to the wall. She reaches up as high as she can and plants both hands beside me. 

“Actually, we didn’t get to finish this morning, did we?”

“...Mary, everyone is literally next door.”

“By this point, you should know me enough that the chance our friends might catch us is only turning me on even more. I’m kind of sad, you know. Plus, it’s not like this is the weirdest thing to happen in this mansion!”

She kisses me again, considerably less innocent this time, before pulling back right before my head goes blank. Between having to reveal the Chaos Gacha and her incredibly understanding reaction, Mary has me entirely on the back foot here and I am not mad. She dips onto her knees, tying her hair back before fiddling with my pants.

“Besides, you owe me. And after the amount of people I’ve been around today, I’m hungrier than I’ve been in a while~!”

“W-Wait,” I say, holding my pants up. “I-I guess telling you about it counts as a feat?”

Mary stands. “...Where? Am I meant to see something? Can you see something?”

I stare at the glitching screen blotting her face from view.

Feat: Roll With Me - Reveal the Truth About Your Powers to a Loved One!

+1x Bronze Ability Gacha Ticket

“Are you holding something?” Mary asks. “Is it a ticket?”

I nod, feeling my heartbeat slowing down now that curiosity has stopped the Mary train… at least for a little bit.

“Here we go,” I mutter.

Ability: Eros Hide [Common]

Shrouds the user in an aura so that people do not perceive any sexual actions carried out by you or your partner. You could have sex in public and no one would see, hear, or smell a thing—though be warned; you are not intangible.

“What did you get?”

“...Uh. The perfect ability?” I switch out Tantric Healing for Eros Hide. Almost immediately, Mary and I are lit up in a vague pink aura. She gasps and peers at her arms. “Basically, we can get it on without worrying about being seen, heard, or smelled no matter what.”

“Oh, really? I can think of a bunch of uses for that, but for now...”

Mary plunges onto her knees, pulling my pants down to my ankles.

“...Thanks for the meal~!”

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