No Holds Barred (Mushoku Tensei/Celestial Dojo) - Chapter 7 (Patreon)

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K417 - Boreas Greyrat Manor, The Citadel of Roa

“Master Eiji~!”

I’m on my way to the kitchens when Rudeus stops me, panting with his hands on his knees. There’s a hefty sack attached to his belt, which draws my eyebrows up as I wait for him to catch his breath.

He heaves, clearing his throat. “Can… Can you take me to the city, please? You’re headed that way, right?!”

“Nope. I’m going to the kitchens, actually.”

He looks up at me, leering with a look that doesn’t belong on any nine-year-old’s face. I immediately bring my fist down on the crown of his head, and though he yelps in pain, it says a lot that Rudeus doesn’t utter a word of complaint. Since I busted him perving on Eris three years ago, I can’t say he’s become any less pervy, nor have I made it a habit to stalk him every hour of the day. A simple talk between Eris and I on what she should do stopped his creepy shit almost immediately. Every once in a while, I do catch him leering at… everyone, really. The maids, Ghislaine, Tala, Hilda (who doesn’t seem to like him either).

Rudeus looks up at me with crocodile tears in his eyes. “...Why?!”

“Don’t look at me like that, you know why. Be as much of a perv as you want, but do it in your own head. I’ve given up trying to fix you, but I won’t have any student of mine turn into a molesting piece of shit, you hear me?” I say, folding my arms. “I’ll beat you black and blue before that day comes.”

He mutters under his breath, swallowing whatever smart retort he had cooking in the face of my glare.

“Why are you even asking me? Isn’t Ghislaine around? She usually ferries you and Eris on your city trips, right?”

“Everyone’s avoiding me, for some reason,” he says, rolling his eyes. “How stupid do they think I am? I know when my own birthday is. It’s obvious they’re planning something for me, otherwise why would they be avoiding me on my birthday?”

“Not every kid’s a precocious little shit like you. Do you think Eris would guess people were cooking her up a birthday party?” Lifting my arm, I ruffle his hair while he snickers to himself. Man, these kids sure grow quick, huh? I remember when he was even more of a midget than he was now.

Rudeus looks up at me again. “So? Please, can you take me? I want to buy some more magic books using the money my parents sent me.”

“You really had to hit me where it hurts, huh?”

A couple days ago, Rudeus got a reply letter from his parents. He wanted them to swing by with his little siblings so they could all celebrate his 10th birthday together. Instead, he got a letter and some presents from them in advance because there were too many monsters lurking around Buena Village. Hell, monster attacks were on the rise in the Fittoa Region in general, again, coinciding with my arrival here. There’s not any real proof that it’s my fault, but it’s a theory that hasn’t really been disproven yet either.

“...Fuck it, I’ll take you. Not like I’ve got much else to do. But you better promise to stay away from the Red Light District. Hookers aren’t the only thing they’ve got in there. There’s some real sick shit that I don’t think you’ll want to look at, not to mention all the thieves and thugs.”

“No thug in the world can beat me!” He puffs out his chest.

I give him a look.

“I’ll stay away from the prostitutes. Besides, I want magic books, which have nothing to do with the Red Light District.”

“Funny. Last time I took you down to the city, you somehow ended up there. Did you have business then, too?”

Rudeus hangs his head. “Understood, Master Eiji.”

“Good; now, let’s get a move on, birthday dinner party and all.”

It’s only about one in the afternoon, which puts me at five hours since Ghislaine beat my ass. About a year ago, I got close to beating her, which pushed my confidence through the roof. After that, she disappeared for two weeks, apparently running some jobs at the Adventurer’s Guild to cull some of the monsters popping up around the region. She came back, thoroughly beat my ass, and has been continuing to do so ever since.

By her pretty accurate estimations, I’m as strong as a Sword King now. In other words, as strong as she was. I might’ve accidentally lit a fire under her ass, because she’s now a Sword Emperor, at least in power. Apparently she can’t actually be promoted to the rank until she fights another Sword King and wins. Or until her master sees her and decides to do it, which he can just do apparently.

Which sucks for me, because once I almost got that win, I was on cloud nine. I don’t plan on being a Boreas Greyrat Guard forever, even if I’ve been here for four years. Eris’ and Rudeus’ training with me is nearing its end, and the same goes for Rudeus’ tutoring. One more year and it all comes to a close. Ghislaine’s going to take Eris to the Holy Land of Swords, where her master teaches the Sword God style, and Rudeus is going to go to the University of Magic with his childhood half-elf friend using the money he’s saved these past four years.

As for me… well, I’m gonna try to do some adventuring. For one, that shit sounds fun. But four years here and everything I’ve learned about this world has been through books. Yeah, I’ve seen magic and a fuckton of beastmen. But I wanna see a dragon and fight a bunch of people. There’s nothing like a good fight to inject colour back into life, too. I’ll bet there are tons of tournaments for cash in a world like this.

There hasn’t really been much opportunity for rewards from this Dojo system, to be honest. I haven’t got any for sparring Ghislaine since the first time. I probably won’t till I beat her. It’s been entirely quiet for two years now, which I don’t exactly mind. The Shotokan and ki have been a blast to dive into. I’ve managed to tap into my other ki affinities. Darkness isn’t necessarily an affinity like wind and fire are. It’s more so negativity, which makes sense. I’ve always had a short fuse and tend to fight better when I’m amped up via emotion. It’s nothing extra like the Murderous Hado, though, and it’s something that I can’t even tap into consciously. My fire-based attacks go from orange to more red-hot, for instance. Winds become less controlled and more tempestuous.

That said, Hadokens are exactly what I’d thought they’d be—fucking awesome! Just the look on Ghislaine’s face when I hurled it at her will forever be a core memory… though the look on her face when she caught the second one was considerably less memorable. Mostly because I was too busy getting kicked in the fucking head. Ah, well. That’s life.

Rudeus talks my ear off about some kind of magic theory while he peruses the different books in his favourite shop. Some shit about spell formations that let most people circumvent incantations. Not like how he’s taught us to do it. The advantage with them is that you can fire off multiple spells, even if they take more time and aren’t as malleable compared to casting via the Rudeus Method (which is what the actual patented name will be.)

I nod along, even when I’ve stopped understanding half of what’s coming out his mouth, answering half-heartedly.

“Master Eiji, I asked whether you think that’s possible.”

“Then no.”

He sighs. “You’re not listening, are you?”

“I’m keeping an eye out for thieves. A very important job, seeing the money you’ve got on your hip. You’re welcome.”

“Of course.”

This same shop is where I bought a primer on Beast-God. The Greyrat Manor Library was useful, but I needed extra help. The owner recognises Rudeus immediately and starts chatting with him about some new arrivals, leaving me free to wander around and see whether there’s anything interesting. And there’s plenty of interesting shit. There’s a whole shelf devoted to monsters, another to the history of the Three Sword Styles, and a rather thick book about the various labyrinths scattered across the world. I pick that last one up, flip through a few pages, and almost decide to buy it until I see the price.

…What the fuck? I turn the book over, checking whether I’ve misread the tag, but nope. Six silver coins, which is 60% of my entire beefed-up salary. A few years back, I was upgraded to Eris’ martial arts instructor and backup bodyguard. Which means I get paid a bodyguard’s salary and then some! The only reason I’m not earning the full two gold coins that Ghislaine does is because I’ve got no reputation or renown to justify it. The original proposed salary was six silver coins, but Philip insisted on adding four more silvers to round it up to an even ten—or one asuran gold coin.

Still in shock, I stare at the book, then at the shelves surrounding me. Sure, I know paper’s expensive here, but Jesus Christ. No wonder so many people can’t read. You’d have to be rich enough to afford an education in the first place, and then rich enough to afford the bloody books!

“Man, reading should be a universal right. Don’t libraries exist?” I mutter in Japanese.

“That’s the Middle Ages for you,” Rudeus replies. “No public libraries, no compulsory education, and—”

We both stop what we’re doing. Rudeus is standing a few feet away, holding two books against his chest. His mouth is hanging slightly open, and he’s staring at me with an expression I’ve never seen on his face before. For a second, I wonder whether I’ve misheard him. Not only did he speak Japanese, but the kid said the Middle Ages, a term that doesn’t exist here!

“Rudy.”

His mouth closes. “Y-Yes, Master?”

“Say that again.”

“Say what?”

“What you just said.”

“I-I was saying that books are expensive.”

“In Japanese.”

He swallows.

The shopkeeper looks up from his counter. “Is something wrong?”

“Nope!” I say, smiling at him. “I need to have a private word with the kid.”

“Master Eiji, I-I’ve been learning your language these past few—” I grab Rudeus by the wrist and march towards the door. “Master?!”

“Come on.”

“W-Wait, my books!”

“You can buy them later. We need to talk now.”

I don’t stop until we’re outside, and even then I keep walking, dragging him along the street until I find an alley between two buildings. It’s empty apart from a few barrels and some rubbish piled against the wall. Still, for the sake of privacy, I take us deep into the alley. No one gives me a second look because I’m in my work clothes, so they assume Rudeus is some pickpocketing little shit. Like he said, this world’s a fantasy Middle Ages.

“Talk.”

Rudeus backs up a step till he’s against a wall. “…About what?”

“Don’t fuck with me.” He flinches. “I’m not in the mood.”

I take a breath through my nose. There are about a thousand questions I want to ask him, and they’re all trying to come out at once. How does he know Japanese? Where’s he from? How long has he been here? Does he know what happened to me? Are there more people like us? Fuck, man, four years. Four fucking years of thinking I was the only guy from Earth in this entire world, while he was living low-key!

“Are you from Japan?” I ask in Japanese.

Rudeus looks down. “…Yes.”

“Holy shit!” I laugh, running a hand through my hair. “Are you fucking serious?!”

He nods.

“Where from?”

“Tokyo.”

“Tokyo? I’m from Osaka! Well, I was originally from Tokyo, but my family moved when I was six. Fucking hell, man, I—” I stop. …Rudeus Greyrat was born here. I’ve met his parents, so he’s not like me. I’m standing here in the same body I had on Earth. Rudeus is a little boy with light brown, almost blond, hair and green eyes. “Hang on. You were born here, but you remember Japan?”

He’s… reincarnated. That’s a thing? I mean, apparently it fucking is, since I got hit by a truck and should’ve died. But why’s he here with a new body while I’m not?

“How much do you remember?”

Rudeus hesitates. “Quite a bit.”

“Your parents? School? Everything?”

“…Most things.”

I rub my face. There’s a part of me that wants to grab him by the shoulders and start shaking the answers out of him. I want to hear about convenience stores, trains, the internet, all the stupid little things I haven’t seen in years. If he misses home, or if there’s anything to miss in the first place. I know I don’t have much to miss. Funny, I didn’t know how isolated I felt until someone else spoke Japanese around me. It’s weird, because I haven’t felt lonely till now. I guess it’s a different kind of isolation.

Wait one minute…

“…Rudy,” I ask, feeling something curdle in my stomach. “How old are you?”

He swallows thickly. “Ten today.”

“I mean before. How old were you when you died?”

“My memories aren’t exactly the same as they were,” he says quietly. “I’ve lived here for ten years now, and a lot of things are different. I mean, I’m basically a child anyway. I’ve grown up here, so—”

“How old?”

“Master—”

“Rudeus, I’m not fucking joking.”

He looks at me, vulnerable, and a little afraid. I’m not sure what he sees, but when I look at him, I remember a little boy trying to pull down a sleeping girl’s underwear, who leers at maids, and got caught stealing underwear by Tala. I told myself, then, that he was a kid. A creepy little shit, sure, but a kid nonetheless who needed to be taught better.

But apparently not.

“How old were you?” I ask again.

Rudeus’ eyes start to water. “I… I was thirty-four.”

He’s almost ten years older than me. When I first got here, I was twenty-two, and now I’m twenty-six! He’s basically ten, so that makes him, what? Forty-four?! Suddenly everything comes back to me and twists my gut into knots. How many sleazy comments did I laugh off, or let him get away with by cuffing him behind the head. I trusted him around Eris after I caught him with his head up her skirt!

Thirty-four?!

“YOU FUCKING—!” I punch him. Rudeus stumbles sideways and falls against the wall. “You were a grown fucking man?!”

“M-Master, wait!”

“And Eris?! Do you have no fucking conscience?! Even if you were physically a kid, you couldn’t wait. Were you some kind of kiddie fiddler on Earth?!”

His face drains of colour. “Master Eiji, please—”

“Don’t say my fucking name!” I punch him again, sending him down. He collapses onto the cobblestones, curling up with his arms over his head.

“I’m sorry!” he sobs. “I-I was wrong! I’m sorry!”

I stand over him, breathing hard. He’s crying. He’s a little boy—no. He’s thirty-four.

“FUCK!” I kick the pile of rubbish over in anger. Rudeus jerks violently at the movement, squeezing his eyes shut.

“P-Please stop!”

I grab his collar and haul him halfway upright. “Do you have any idea how much I trusted you?!”

He nods frantically.

“Do you?!”

“Y-Yes!”

“You knew exactly what you were doing, and you let me think you were just some stupid kid who didn’t know any better!”

“I-I didn’t know how to tell you!”

“BULLSHIT!” My fist draws back.

Rudeus throws both hands over his face. He’s shaking so badly I can feel it through his shirt. I stare at him, at his bloodied nose and wet cheeks, at the little hands trying to protect his head. It’s the polar opposite of the smart fighter I’ve come to know and raised. He knows how to take a hit. Seeing him like this hurts me as much as it fucking infuriates me, maybe more. I could hit him again. Fuck, I want to!

But I let go instead. Rudeus drops onto his backside, scrambling backwards until his shoulders hit the wall. I look down at him for another few seconds, trying to think of something to say that might make any of this better.

“…Find your own way home,” I mutter.

His eyes widen. “Master—”

“Don’t.”

I turn around and leave and don’t look back until I’m nearly out of the alley. Rudeus is still sitting where I left him, trembling so hard his shoulders jump when we make eye contact. There’s a dark patch spreading across the front of his trousers. Gritting my teeth till they hurt, I walk away and spend the rest of the afternoon wandering Roa without any particular destination, occasionally stopping to buy something to eat or drink. By evening, I’ve gone through most of the bronze coins I brought with me, and I haven’t even enjoyed any of it. 

Every time I start thinking about something else, that fucking number comes back, forcing me to reevaluate every interaction I’ve ever had with the little fucker. Was I wrong to hit him? Probably… not. I don’t fucking know. If he’d been a grown man standing in front of me, I wouldn’t have hesitated. I’d have beaten him until he couldn’t stand, and I’d have slept like a baby afterwards, too. He was Rudeus. The same kid, who isn’t a kid, that I’ve spent years teaching how to fight, who gifted me with a hand-carved wand, and still called me master after I beat his ass for being a fucking molesting piece of shit. Is he an adult if he’s got the body and mind of a child? He sure as shit shouldn’t touch anyone near his age. I was right to hit him and still feel like shit.

Eventually, the streets start looking familiar for an entirely different reason. It’s the Red Light District. Great. A familiar woman leaning against a doorway notices me looking around and smiles.

“Evening, handsome.”

“Evening, Edna,” I mutter. She’s one of the usual prostitutes hawking outside many fine establishments. They’re all in on the game we guards play to see whether their fellow guards will cave to their wiles. So far, I’ve been the only one to stay strong, and it’s been their goal to get me to sleep with one of them before I leave Philip’s employ.

“You look miserable,” Edna says.

“Fuck, I feel miserable.”

“Then you’ve come to the right place.” She pushes away from the doorway and approaches, slipping an arm around mine. “Come on. I’ll make you forget whatever’s bothering you.”

“Tempting.”

“Only tempting?” She laughs. “That’s a shame.”

Her hand settles against my chest. I look at her. She’s pretty. Older than me, probably. Nice figure, nice smile. Dunno how clean she is, to be honest, but I’m sure there are potions, since brothels this fancy and out-in-the-open wouldn’t be legal otherwise. Judging by the way she’s looking at me, she’s perfectly willing to bear whatever foul mood I’m carrying.

I can’t help but laugh.

“What’s funny?” she asks, still hanging off me.

“Nothing. I’m in a really shitty mood.”

“Oh, I noticed.”

“Yeah, well.” I gently take her wrist and move her hand away. “I don’t think I can trust myself to treat you properly.”

Edna studies me for a moment, then she leans in and runs her tongue along my earlobe. “Sweetheart, so long as you pay me, you can ride me harder than a warhorse on its last legs…”

…Fuck. I close my eyes for a second and sit through the electric shudder racing up my spine before shaking my head.

“Maybe some other time.”

She pouts. “I was so close, too~!”

“I’m sorry,” I say, laughing.

“Ah, well. It’s totally your loss, good-looking.”

I give her a little wave and continue walking with no destination in mind. Rudeus’ birthday party is today, which means I’m not headed back till tomorrow morning at the latest. That’s a lot of time to sit alone with my thoughts. Lifting the few coins I have left, I circle to the cheapest pub I know.

“...Fuck it, I’m drinking myself to sleep.”

【—〄—】

I return to the manor tired, hungry, with a headache, and no less pissed than I was yesterday. The guards at the gate give me a wide berth, though one asks me where I was all night.

“It’s not like you to miss a party, Eiji,” he says.

I shrug. “What can I say, Taz? I wasn’t in the mood.”

“I’ll bet he finally caved and slept at a henhouse,” Bert says.

Taz gives me a second look. “...How much.”

“Four bronze coins.”

“...Fuck it, I’m in. I bet that he didn’t,” Taz says.

Bert smiles. “We’ll find out tonight!”

“Taz is gonna win,” I say over my shoulder.

“Good poker face, but I can smell the women on you, Eiji!”

A ghost of a smile flickers across my face. Their bickering fades behind the gate, and beyond it is the courtyard, mostly empty at this hour. Ghislaine’s there… and so is Tala, arms folded. Neither of them looks particularly pleased to see me. The lavender-haired beastwoman pats Ghislaine’s shoulder, then they start walking towards me with purpose.

“Where were you?” Tala snaps.

“Out.” I stifle a yawn. “Good morning to you, too.”

Ghislaine frowns. “Eiji.”

“Had a bit too much to drink and lost track of time dealing with petty shit. Pickpockets, bar fights, and whatnot.”

Ghislaine stops in front of me. Her ears are drooping, and there are dark circles beneath her eyes. Tala doesn’t look much better either.

“You could’ve sent word,” she says. “Especially after Rudeus came back without you.”

“What did he say?” I ask.

“That you were working?”

“…Sorry.”

Ghislaine studies my face.

“Rudeus came back yesterday. He was crying,” she continues. “He nearly didn’t attend his own birthday party. Eris managed to drag him out eventually.”

My hackles rise at ‘Rudeus’ and ‘Eris’ being in the same sentence, but I swallow the fury and listen.

“He wouldn’t tell anyone what happened, and everyone was so relieved that he left his room that they didn’t press him on it. Do you know what happened?”

I shake my head.

“Did something happen between you?” Tala asks, frowning.

“No.” The lie comes out too quickly. I force a shrug amidst their frowns. “Kid probably got into some trouble. You know how he is.”

For a moment, I think Ghislaine’s going to press me. Instead, she sighs and turns around, shrugging off her jacket and leaving her down to the thin red bra she wears.

“Come train.”

“…Now?”

“Yes.”

We head towards the training grounds while Tala goes in the direction of the kitchens, shooting me a look that screams ‘we’re not done’ which I’m sure we’re not. Ghislaine beats the shit out of me faster than ever before. Jeez, the last time she beat me this quickly was maybe three years ago…

A few minutes later, the doors to the manor open.

“EIJI!” Eris marches towards us, red hair bouncing behind her, pissed beyond belief. “WHERE WERE YOU?!”

“Morning to you too.”

“You missed Rudeus’ birthday!”

“Yeah. I know.”

“He was waiting for you!”

Somehow, I doubt that.

Eris plants her fists on her hips. “And then he came back all upset, and now he’s sick!”

“Sick?”

“Yes! He’s not coming out of his room! That is sickness!”

I swallow. “Where is he? Here?”

“In his room! I just said that!” Eris huffs, looking up at me with muted eagerness. “...Anyway, you’re still coming today, aren’t you?”

“…Coming where?”

“To see his magic! He’s going to show everyone his strongest spell! He promised, so you can make it up to him, then.”

Oh, yeah. I remember him mentioning something about it a few days ago.

Eris folds her arms. “Well?”

“Go get ready for your lessons with Ghislaine,” I say, sighing.

“But—”

“Not the time, Eris.”

“FINE—BE THAT WAY!” She walks over to the weapons rack, scowling at me and muttering under her breath. I watch her go, retreating back into the manor.

Ghislaine starts their usual one-on-one morning session, finally drawing her hurt red eyes away from me.

【—〄—】

A couple of hours later, freshly washed and wearing a clean set of clothes, I find myself sitting in the kitchens with a plate of eggs, sausages, and bread in front of me. It’s well past the usual breakfast hour, so most of the servants have already eaten and gone back to work. Ghislaine and Eris have left the manor with Rudy, though not before my formerly-feral female student tried to find me, to no avail. Ghislaine knew where I was, but I think she could tell that I didn’t want to go. Though she did stare at my hiding spot for a while before dragging Eris away.

Tala sets a cup of tea beside my plate. “Eat.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

She doesn’t leave.

I pick up a sausage. “Something on your mind?”

“Rudeus.”

…Of course.

“What about him?”

“Don’t play stupid with me, Eiji.” Tala watches me for a moment before pulling out the chair opposite mine. “He came down for breakfast this morning, and when somebody mentioned your name, he dropped his plate and started trembling like a leaf. He didn’t even eat his food, saying he lost his appetite, so tell, what the hell happened between you two?”

“...Nothing.”

“Bullshit.”

“Then why’d you ask?”

“Because I thought you might tell me yourself instead of making me drag it out of you.”

I take another bite, mostly to give myself something to do while Tala stares me down.

She sighs. “Look, I know you’ve had to knock some sense into that boy before. Half the maids know it, too, but whatever happened yesterday, it was bad enough that he’s frightened of you.”

“Yeah? Well, maybe he should be.” Tala’s eyebrow curls and immediately makes me regret saying it.

“Eiji, what did he do?”

I stare down at my breakfast. There’s a very simple answer to that question. He’s a thirty-four-year-old man who got reincarnated, and I’ve spent the last four years treating him like a precocious little shit instead of the grown child-molesting fuckwit he is. Except then I’d have to explain Japan and reincarnation.

And, frankly, I don’t know what the fuck to think about any of it myself. He’s a child, clearly, seeing how he reacted, but he’s got the life experience of an adult, which makes what he did wrong no matter how you cut it. Let’s say there’s no feeling like punching a child who’s tearfully begging you to stop and Rudeus is both child and adult in all the ways that matter.

“Something I can’t tell you,” I mutter.

Tala’s staring at me with a rather unpleasant expression. “Can’t, or won’t?”

“Both.”

“Okay, did he hurt someone or try to?”

“Not yesterday.”

Her expression darkens.

I set my cutlery down. “Whatever you think you know, trust me, you don’t.”

“Then explain it.”

“I can’t!” My voice comes out loud. A maid washing dishes at the other end of the kitchen glances over. Tala reaches across the table and takes my cup of diluted beer, refilling it from the pot.

“Eat your breakfast before it gets cold,” she finally says.

“...That’s it?”

“For now.”

“You’re a scary woman, you know that?”

“Keep talking and I’ll take your sausages.”

“You’ve already taken my sausage,” I mutter, snickering. “Lots of times, and you loved it. But not during breakfast. That’d be a first for you.”

“A-Alright, that’s it!” she huffs, reaching across to the table for my plate. I start eating with gusto, cramming in as many as I can before she gets there when a dog-eared maid appears at the kitchen entrance.

“Excuse me? Master Eiji?”

“Yeah?”

“Lord Philip would like to see you.”

“Now?”

“At your earliest convenience, sir.”

I put my fork down and turn. “Right. Anything I should know before I go?”

The maid hesitates. I watch her eyes flick towards Tala, then back to me.

“Lady Hilda is with him.”

“And?”

“She’s…” The maid lowers her voice. “Rather upset, sir.”

“How upset? Very?”

“At me?” She gives me an apologetic look. “…You didn’t hear that from me.”

I push my chair back. “Well, thanks for the warning.”

The maid curtsies and hurries away.

“I’m coming,” Tala says.

“Like hell you are.” She gives me a dry look. “Tala, this is Philip we’re talking about. And Hilda. You don’t want to get involved.”

“I’m already involved because I know you’re not telling me something, and I’d rather hear what you have to say before Lady Hilda decides what happened for you. It’s no secret that she hates your guts.”

I rub my face. “You’re going to get yourself fired.”

“Fired?”

“Yes, fired. You know, when someone tells you to fuck off and stops paying you?”

“I know what fired means, you idiot.” Tala snorts. “Do you have any idea how many noble households would kill to have me running their kitchens? I’ve been cooking for the Boreas Greyrats for years. I know what I’m worth, and so does Lord Philip. If Lady Hilda wants to dismiss me for speaking my mind, she can explain to her husband why he’ll need to find another chef before supper. Millis knows I won’t cook for them free of charge.”

“You’re a Millis worshipper?”

She waves me off. “Figure of speech!”

“That’s a pretty fucking big gamble.”

“Not really.” She unties her apron and hangs it beside the door, brushing past me. “I’ve seen that little shit leering at the maids and caught him stealing their underthings, too. He’s all bows and smiles, then you turn around, and he’s staring up at somebody’s skirt. Twisted little pests like that grow into men who do worse things than steal knickers.”

I stare at Tala’s back whilst she walks away, feeling a whole new kind of admiration for her because she has no idea how close she is.

“Tala.”

When she turns, her face perfectly captures the morning sunlight at such an angle that those slitted yellow eyes of hers look like pools of gold.

I shake my head. “You’re a pain in my ass.”

“Good. Maybe the pain’ll remind you to leave a note instead of leaving everyone worried sick next time.”

Philip’s office is on the second floor. I’ve been here often enough that the guards outside barely bother looking at me, though both straighten when they see Tala following behind.

One knocks. “Lord Philip? Master Eiji is here.”

“Send him in.”

“H-He’s with Head Chef Tala.”

“...Send them both in.”

The guards open the door to let us in. Philip’s sitting behind his desk, looking inscrutable. There’s a stack of papers in front of him and a cup of tea at his elbow. Hilda, meanwhile, is standing behind him, one hand resting on the top of his chair. There’s only one other chair opposite his. He motions that I sit on it. Tala stands behind me with a hand on my shoulder.

Boy, if looks could kill…

“Eiji,” Hilda says coldly.

“Lady Hilda.”

Her eyes move to Tala. “Why is the cook here?”

“Good morning, my lady.” Tala curtseys behind me, by the sound of it. “I asked to accompany him.”

“I don’t recall my husband summoning you.”

“No, my lady.”

“Then leave.”

“With respect, I’d prefer to remain.”

Hilda’s eyebrows shoot up.

Philip puts down his pen. “Tala?”

“Lord Philip, I’ve heard some rather troubling rumours concerning Master Eiji and young Master Rudeus. I thought it best to accompany him in case there was a misunderstanding.”

“A misunderstanding?” Hilda repeats.

“Yes, my lady.”

“What is there to misunderstand? Rudeus Greyrat, my nephew, a boy I liken to my own sons, nearly burst into tears when somebody mentioned this hooligan’s name!” She points at me with a trembling finger.

I fold my arms. “Morning to you, too.”

“Do not take that tone with me!”

“Then stop pointing at me like I’m a fucking criminal.”

“Eiji,” Philip says weakly. “Peace. I do not accuse you of anything.”

Hilda takes a step forward, still behind his chair. “Do you deny striking him?”

“No.”

Her mouth falls open.

“What? I’m not going to lie about that.”

Hilda looks positively murderous. “You struck a Greyrat child on his name day, and you have the gall to stand there acting as though you’ve done nothing wrong?!”

There’s a lot I could say. Instead, I look towards Philip. “Did you ask Rudy what happened?”

“Of course I did,” he replies.

“And?”

“He refused to tell me.”

“Then perhaps you ought to ask yourself why.”

“Perhaps because he’s terrified of your violence!” Hilda scoffs.

I snort. “And perhaps tomorrow, Perugius will descend from his castle in the sky and declare me his estranged son and heir.”

Philip laughs before he can control his reaction, turning all his wife’s ire onto him. And I am not sorry in the slightest! She’s been hating me ever since I punched Eris during our first spar all those years ago. From then, I was some violent bastard Philip dragged in off the streets. Never mind that I’ve spent four years working for this family, teaching her daughter my martial arts to keep her out of trouble. Of course, I don’t hold Philip and Eris accountable for her fuckups.

Now, it’d be a whole other question if she was anything more than Philip’s wife, but she’s got no say in how much I get paid and what I can do. But one incident, four years ago, and apparently that’s all I’ll ever be to her. On any other day, I’d swallow the irritation and keep it pushing, but I’m hungover and cranky.

Today, of all days, I really don’t fucking need her bitchiness.

“You want to know why I hit him?” I ask.

“Yes!”

“Because he did something disgusting, and I’m sick of people pretending he’s too young to know better!”

Hilda recoils slightly.

“What exactly did he do?” Philip asks, his face hardening.

I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. I can’t tell them without telling them everything. Norms in this world are nothing like mine. When I reported the Eris incident a few years back to Philip, he laughed and said, “The Greyrat blood flows strong!”

Hilda lets out a bitter laugh. “How convenient.”

“Ex-fucking-cuse me?” I turn towards her.

“Hmph! Filthy-tongued as always. I said it is convenient because you are accusing a child of something unspeakable, yet you refuse to explain yourself. How very convenient for you.”

“Lady Hilda,” Tala interjects, “with respect, young Master Rudeus has a history of inappropriate behaviour towards the female servants and your own daughter.”

“That is hardly grounds for beating such fear into him!”

“No, my lady. But I would suggest hearing Master Eiji out before deciding he’s acted without cause.”

“He just admitted to striking a child of ours!”

“And he’s also served this household faithfully for four years.”

“That does not grant him the right to—”

“I didn’t say it did.” Tala bows her head slightly. “I’m merely saying that I’ve known him for years, my lady. He’s got a temper, certainly, but I’ve never known him to beat someone without believing he had a good reason.”

I look at her. I don’t think I’ve ever heard her speak so properly in ages. She’s always gruff and coarse around me. She makes sure not to look me in the eye when I turn around with my winning smile. Hm… is it me, or is she a little red in the face?

“Believing he had good reason is not enough!”

“That’s true,” Philip says slowly. Both women turn towards him. “Tala, I appreciate your concern and your loyalty to Eiji. But this is a matter concerning one of my daughter’s tutors, and I would prefer to speak with him directly.”

 “See? Told you it’d be fine.” Tala hesitates, so I give her a little shrug.

“You told me the exact opposite,” she mutters.

“Details, love.”

“The hell—” Her flush triples, ears flapping atop her head as she cuts herself off. “L-Love?! Are you a moron? I’m trying to be serious here!”

Philip smiles. “Okay, Eiji. Back to the matter at hand, now.”

Tala moves towards the door, but I twist in my chair and catch her wrist before she leaves.

“Thanks,” I mutter.

She squeezes my hand. “Don’t do something stupid.”

“Depends on what the lady says,” I whisper back. Of course, Hilda resumes her bullshit before Tala even leaves the room.

“I want him removed from Eris and Rudeus’ instruction.”

“Hilda,” Philip says.

“No, Philip. I’ve tolerated this arrangement long enough. First he strikes our daughter, and now Rudeus. How long until he decides Eris needs that kind of discipline?”

My chair scrapes against the floor as I stand. “You’ve got some fucking nerve.”

“Eiji,” Philip says firmly.

“No, seriously. Four fucking years! I’ve spent four years teaching your daughter, and you’re still holding that first spar against me?!”

“You bruised half her face! Thankfully Rudeus could heal her, otherwise she’d be walking around getting ridiculed for her unladylike appearance!”

“It was a spar, and she knew the risks when she challenged me to a fight. Before me, she was beating up her teachers for no reason! Why don’t you get pissed off on their behalf?!”

“That doesn’t excuse—”

“Enough!” Philip’s voice cuts across both of ours.

“Eiji is my friend, a Sword King-level fighter, and a friend of the family. I will not see him talked down to any longer. Giving him the cold shoulder was fine, but this is beyond the pale, Hilda!” Philip continues. “That said, Eiji, she is my wife, and she’s frightened for Rudeus and our daughter. You will speak to her with the respect she’s owed.”

“…Fine.”

“And you will explain what happened with Rudeus, please. Rest assured, you are not at risk of being dismissed for disciplining him over his youthful indiscretions. I’m simply here to see if there’s a path to reconciliation between the two of you. You are, after all, master and student.”

I stare at the floor. How the fuck am I supposed to—I look up. The teacup on Philip’s desk is trembling against its saucer. Then the windowpanes start shaking as a low rumble rolls through the manor. Hilda turns towards the window, where a rolling mass of blue light swallows the horizon on its rapid path towards us.

“What is that?”

Philip frowns. “An earthquake?”

The hairs on my arms are standing up.

“Philip.”

He looks at me.

“Get away from the window.”

“What?”

The azure tide floods the room in blinding light. Philip reaches for Hilda as I turn and pull Tala into my chest, closing my eyes. Next thing I know, there’s dirt against my cheek and something sharp digging into my ribs. I open my eyes. Sunlight filters through a canopy of leaves overhead. Birds are calling somewhere in the distance, and there’s a smell of damp earth that has absolutely no business being in Philip’s office.

I push myself upright when somebody groans beside me. Tala’s lying a few feet away, sprawled on her back. I scramble over, cupping her face in my hands.

“Hey. Tala!”

Her eyes flutter open.

“You alright?”

Sitting up, she stares at me, then past me. I look around. Philip’s lying near a fallen log, one arm wrapped around Hilda. They both stir. From the looks of it, it’s just the four of us, in the woods, with neither the manor nor Roa anywhere in sight. I slowly stand. There’s nothing but forest in every direction. Overhead, a bird lets out a shrill cry. I search for it through the branches, glancing at the clear blue sky.

After all these years, the red orb in the sky is gone, and as much as I want to know why, there’s a better question for now, and Tala’s the one to ask it.

“...Where the fuck are we?”