The Redemption of Kylie (Patreon)

Written by Max Harper

Prologue

Alone. Forgotten.

I see darkness all around. It consumes us all.

Darkness. Forever darkness. Time had no meaning in the darkness.

There was little sense of up or down. Can’t taste. Can’t see. Can’t smell. Everything feels cool, slimy. There was something helping with breathing, providing sustenance, but beyond that, nothing. No clothes.

Dulled, muted tones, like sounds, but muffled. Voices? Machines?

Thoughts of home. Faces I can’t recognize. Family? Friends? Mom?

Softness. Soothing warmth. Peace? A hug?

Memories coated in pink. Strange but comforting.

Vertical bars. Prison? Captive? Quiet. Nothingness.

The spherical pods were huge. Far larger than any measurements she had seen in the prototype schematics. There were seven of them, all in a row, taking up a decent amount of the room. They were tilted to an approximate twenty three degrees. Tubes ran through the top and a hiss of filtered air rhythmically sounded. More tubes ran to the bottom of each pod. One was connected to a vat of strange liquid, the other to a small machine next to it. It looked as if it was all connected somehow. Sensors and wires ran from all over the pod to computer monitors that measured everything from temperature to vitals.

On the bulging front of each pod was a small, clear square on the otherwise opaque surface. The woman, with a nod from one of the many technicians that busied themselves around the room, peered through the clear square. Within the pod was the shadow of a person, obscured by the viscous liquid being cycled through the pod. Their nose and mouth were covered by a breathing apparatus and they appeared to be comatose.

Dr. Moira Vale smiled cruelly to herself as she walked away. Her high heeled shoes clicking an ominous echo across the floor. The person in the pod twitched but stayed oblivious, lost in the darkness of the dreamless sleep.

Part One: Secrets

The rain had fallen for what seemed like weeks. Every time Dr. Donna Duncan looked out the window, she could swear that it was raining, or it had just stopped. It wasn’t realistic, of course, but she felt as if her mood was reflected in the weather. Over three weeks had passed since she’d lost her little, Kylie Gillis. Three weeks since she had been put on administrative leave for conduct unbecoming. Three weeks of quiet, soul torn reflection of where it all went wrong. She had been relocated to an apartment, a clear downgrade in housing quality, and forced to burn up her accrued leave time. A slap on the wrist, essentially, as it was a posturing demonstration. A warning to others, as it were. The Institute had already gotten a black eye from Lucy’s fight with Penny Carver. After reviewing the footage from the hidden cameras within Penny’s assigned house, Penny Carver was subsequently discharged from employment. Her treatment of Lucy Hernandez had caused large ripples throughout the Institute. Many board members and financial contributors had questions as to the efficacy and legitimacy of the First Step program. Professor Moira Vale’s dictatorial control over the regression division and its abuse of power had many within the company questioning her leadership. Now facing several inquiries, Moira was hardly seen at all within the company, leaving the task of leadership over the First Step program to no one.

Policy and procedure kept most cases running as if nothing had happened. All of those who operated similar to Penny were put on notice of review, but for the most part, hardly anyone outside of the board and those directly involved felt the pressure of change. Appearances were kept up, and the company moved forward as if nothing had happened.

For Donna, her world had ended. Everything she had come to know and believe was gone. Shunned by all but a few of her colleagues, mainly out of fear of retribution from the board, Donna had no one to turn to for solace. She spent most of her time off isolated and alone, stuck wondering if there was any point to her life. She had given all she had to her job, finding it to be more pleasurable than work had really any right to be. Helping young girls find themselves and their purpose through regression was far more rewarding than being a simple psychologist or counselor. While the regression aspects were not the topic of conversation most of the time, she did find that its therapeutic nature was closely aligned to her philosophy of nurturing care. A lot of her patients/ clients just needed to be loved. Donna may have fallen too far into the maternal role than most patients would like, for her client base, it allowed her an unprecedented level of connection. Never was that more clear than with Kylie.

Kylie Gillis was a name and a face that Donna knew of well before her file crossed her desk. The shop talk from Mark, her colleague and one of her few remaining friends, had spoken about this girl and her mother who had unwittingly stumbled onto the world of regression therapy. Such a thing was exceedingly rare and Donna was interested in Kylie immediately. When she finally had her chance to choose her new little, Kylie’s name was at the forefront of her list and upon meeting her, the young girl had not disappointed. They had quickly fallen into their roles and within the first few weeks, Donna had begun to realize the truth that Kylie couldn’t see. It wasn’t that Kylie needed diapers and regression therapy to help her heal. While true in a sense, it was only a surface fix, not the deep fix. At her core, Kylie was a little. Her heart. Her passion. Her happiness. All of what made her so endearing was that she craved permanent regression. Not back to a full on baby, helpless and fully checked out from the world, but to a toddler state, free from the pressures and torments of the adult world. Happy in a state of bliss, diapered or not, that she didn’t have to shoulder the burdens of adulthood. She had been much closer to realizing her truth than she realized and with a little bit more time, Donna would have had her at the final stage, at Acceptance, ready to face the world as the little girl she was born to be.

That was all in the past now. Kylie was gone. To where and in what capacity, Donna didn’t know. Her last words were an apology to Donna for being a bad girl before she had been restrained and carried off. That was almost a month ago and Donna’s heart ached whenever she thought of Kylie.

There was little she could do to fill her day. She felt lost, purposeless, and lethargic. She could easily diagnose herself with depression but found it to be a self serving gesture. Mostly, she lay about her apartment, drinking wine and feeling sorry for herself. It was all temporary and she knew that. Her contract with the Institute was ironclad and it was only a matter of time before she would be allowed back into her home. With that in mind, she took care of herself. Knowing that copious amounts of alcohol would transfer into her breastmilk, she did what they called a pump and dump. She didn’t have the storage to keep it anyway, and at least she was able to maintain her production level.

The morning had given way to the early afternoon and after a quick run to the toilet, Donna caught her reflection in the bathroom mirror. She was disheveled, her hair a mess, dark bags under her eyes, and bloodshot eyes. She hadn’t been sleeping well if she slept at all, and too much late night tv had kept her from finding suitable rest.

“You need to get a hold of yourself.” She said to no one in particular. “You’re better than this.”

She ran her fingers through her hair and rubbed her eyes. Her attempts to straighten the mess on her head did little to brighten her mood. Rubbing her eyes did the opposite. When her eyes focused again and she saw that her reflection wasn’t just some imagined state, she felt angry that she had let herself devolve into such a state.

“You need a shower. And to get yourself sorted.” She told herself. “No self respecting woman should allow herself to be in such a state.”

She chortled at her verbiage, picturing herself a proper English duchess, chastising herself for her appearance. As quickly as the smile crossed her face, it faded into a frown. She remembered how proper Kylie looked, poofy butt and all, in her skirt and tights. She could at least act the part. Donna’s upbringing hadn’t led to a whole lot of proper behaviors being learned.

Donna let the tears mix with the hot water of her shower. In the midst of her shallow sobs, she found her resolve. It didn’t matter what it would take, Donna would get Kylie back and she would take down anyone and anything that stood in her way.

Lorianne Gillis sat in her office. It was growing dark, her work shift was over, and she couldn’t bring herself to go home. She was searching, nearly every night, for any sign of her daughter, Kylie. Combing through any document that she had access to for any word or clue on Kylie’s whereabouts. She had heard about what had happened and while she was angry that Kylie was involved, she was more worried about what happened after the board meeting. The gossip around the office was that Kylie was taken away and moved to an undisclosed location for an indeterminate amount of time. The other girl, the one who had caused all of the problems, was the central focus of everyone in the department but even then, no one seemed to know what ultimately happened.

Her cell phone lit up and vibrated. She had kept the volume down most of the time to not draw attention to her interoffice relationship. It was Isaac asking her when she would be home so that he could have dinner ready when she walked in the door. In the weeks following their first time at her house, Isaac had moved in, and with a few risky purchases, had made a new home in Lori’s spacious closet. It was part of the strange relationship they had. He didn’t want a room of his own, in fact, he was quite content to sleep on the floor at the foot of her bed. Lori, however, didn’t want anything to appear too out of place in case Kylie came home or she had visitors. To keep up the ruse, she moved him into the closet, on a small cot, and added some pillows to her bed to make it appear as if they were sleeping together.

She ignored the text and continued combing through the files on the server. She knew that if she dug deep enough, she would find what she was looking for, or something that could get her closer and as she scanned the most recent document she had opened, titled Special Project #5, she paused. Reading over it again, she raised an eyebrow before opening her web browser and typing in a phrase she didn’t fully understand.

Several pages later and some extra searches out of concern, she wrote down everything that was off interest on a piece of paper and cleared her browser history. She doubted that it would be enough to stop the Institute from spying on her activities, but she hoped it would slow them down long enough for her to get some answers.

She grabbed her personal effects and the piece of paper before heading to the elevator. She fumbled with her phone and dialed a number that she hadn’t used in what felt like ages. It rang twice before a gruff sounding voice spoke from the other end.

“Hello, Lori, what keeps you up this late at night?”

“I need to talk to you. Can you meet me where we had lunch?”

“You may need to be more specific, I meet with a lot of people.”

“Can’t. They may be listening. Tomorrow. Four o’clock. Come alone.” She hung up the phone and stuffed it into her coat pocket. What she had found was astonishing and not in a good way. Her mind raced with the possibilities of what it could all mean for the rest of the night, so much so that she completely ignored Isaac and any attempt he made to garner her affections.

So many memories were tied to the restaurant. Lori had only been there once, and it felt like ages ago, but as she sat in the parking lot, ignoring Isaac’s texts yet again, she closed her eyes and let the memories wash over her. It was here where she was officially told about the Institute. Here is where the breadcrumbs had finally come together. The symbols, the strange messages, and the off color direction. She partly wished that she had not gone to that meeting.

If she had been able to find acceptance in the situation she had, she wouldn’t be here, wondering if she had inadvertently doomed her daughter. Even at that, had she not taken the advice of a pharmacist on what to do with her bedwetting daughter, it wouldn’t have even made it here.

She looked at her phone, specifically the time, before clearing her notifications and getting out of the car. The piece of paper she had scribbled on was clenched in one hand. She wasn’t going to leave this meeting without answers.

She was escorted to a table away from most of the other patrons. She hadn’t requested it but guessed that her expensive looking pantsuit gave the impression that she was more important than she felt. She sipped a glass of wine while she waited. She wasn’t hungry yet, and she already had dinner plans. She sent a quick text to Isaac, putting in her demands for dinner and planting an idea for later that night. She tried to distract herself with thoughts of the young man but was too consumed by her concerns for Kylie.

Her guest arrived right before four, punctual as always. She felt strange as he sat down, the tables feeling more reversed than they were. She knew more than before and was more prepared.

“Do you know how long it took me to remember this place?” Mark asked as he sat down.

The waiter wasn’t far behind him and after a quick perusal of the menu, he ordered his drink.

“And here I thought that I had left some sort of impression.”

“Oh, you have. I must admit that you caught me a little off guard last night.”

“Not so nice not holding all of the cards, is it?”

The waiter returned and Mark paused the conversation to sip his drink. “Let’s first assume for the moment that you have cards to hold. What’s with the clandestine meeting?” “Where’s Kylie?” Lori asked, brunt and to the point.

A simple question, but one that gave Mark pause. It wasn’t one he was expecting to hear. Ever since the judgment of the council, there had been nothing but rumors as to what happened to Lucy Hernandez and Kylie Gillis. Absolved of any involvement by his peers, Mark had gone back to business as usual. As with any bureaucrat, his first line of defense was deflection.

“I’m not sure I understand the question.”

“It seems pretty simple. Where’s my daughter?”

“With someone at the Institute. Where else would she be?” Redirection, when deflection failed.

“Who? Who is she with?”

“I’m not at liberty to divulge that information.”

“But you know. You know where she is, and what happened to her.”

“Yes. But again, I’m not permitted to discuss it. For her therapy and for your position.”

“I couldn’t give a damn about my position.”

“Really? Because you should.” Mark said with a bemused smirk. “Word has it that you are in the direct line for the head of the regression division. Hate to see you throw all of that away on some pointless crusade.”

“Pointless crusade? My daughter’s wellbeing is not pointless!”

“No, but your need to know about it is.”

“Or so you claim. You are aware that I outrank you, right?”

Mark laughed. “Do you really think that matters? No, dear Lori, rank doesn’t matter. What matters is knowledge. Every business is a cutthroat affair of gathering as much dirt on everyone as humanly possible.”

“And you think you have what it takes to blackmail me into silence?”

“Depends on how you feel about interoffice relationships.”

He played himself right into her hand and didn’t even notice. Lori had spent her time climbing the corporate ladder and gathering as much information as she could about everyone she could. Isaac was great for that. Barely noticeable, Isaac picked up a lot of gossip and chatter throughout the many offices in the building as he ran errands. He was more than happy to tell Lori everything in return for favorable treatment in their bedroom. Lori had been burned by office chatter at too many other jobs to let it happen to her here.

“Oh, I’d feel about the same as you would about Sarah Walker.”

Mark’s face paled mid sip. He swallowed slowly, staring intently at Lori. He set his glass down and interlaced his fingers.

Lori’s face remained stoic but inside she was revelling in her tactical brilliance. “Now that we understand each other, where is my daughter?”

Mark inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly. “A dangerous game you are playing.”

“One I don’t intend to lose. Now, I’m getting tired of asking. Where-”

“I don’t know exactly where she is. Last I saw her, she was being taken away after the ruling of the council.”

“A hidden council that you had a seat on.”

“Have. We only meet when the situation calls for it.”

“Not exactly the most transparent of companies.”

“We all have our secrets.”

“We do.”

“So what do you want from me for your silence?”

“I want to know that she’s safe.”

“She is. You have my word on that.”

“I need proof.”

“I can’t do proof.”

“I don’t want to hear excuses.”

“It’s not an excuse. I don’t know where she is so I can’t get you the proof that you want.”

“Tch. Fine. Then I want you to do something for me.”

“What?”

“I want to know what Special Project #5 is. Specifically, what does L.T.S.D. have to do with it?” From her research, she knew it stood for, long term sensory deprivation, and everything she had read about its potential uses reiterated that it shouldn't be used for more than a few hours.

“Where did you hear about that?” Mark had stiffened again. Lori clearly had him on edge.

“It doesn’t matter. What matters is how you reacted to it. You know something and I want to know what you know.”

“I’m not accustomed to sticking my neck out like this.”

“Information is a powerful tool if you know how to use it.”

“That it is. Very well. I’m sure you did some research of your own, but I’ll fill in the blanks.

Special Project #5 was thought up by Frank Summers and his wife. No relation to your boy toy.

The concept was simple: to utilize the isolating properties of sensory deprivation to quickly facilitate a total regression. The problem lies in how long a person can be within a sensory deprivation tank without long term psychological damage. The answer lies in the right amount of stimuli. Once that was solved, it was a matter of marrying that concept with some normal world technology, enlarged to fit an adult. Hence why the project was formally called Project Womb.

Womb’s goal was to create an atmosphere wherein the subject could be fully cut off from any and all interactions with others. Essentially, as the name suggests, they would be going back into the womb. While logistically, this sounded preposterous, it actually wasn’t that bad to sort out. Scientists have been working on small scale artificial wombs for years, we just took the necessary steps forward. Common concerns were the handling of nutrition and waste, as well difficult problems such as muscle atrophy and skin maceration. The submerging liquid we used was specifically created to handle the long term problems while providing a dense enough material to allow for full, long term suspension. Think of it as super amniotic fluid. Add in feeding and filtration systems and the only long term effect we found was atrophy, which fit well with regression as it made diapers a necessity. Everything else, we solved.

It took some time to tweak things and when it was presented to the board, they had already done a few long term trials. The last thing I heard about Project Womb, was that we were shelving it for not being cost efficient enough for widespread use.”

“That doesn’t mean that it wasn’t backburnered for specific cases.”

“No, it doesn’t, but that would go against the council’s decision and any action taken without our express approval is a gravely serious matter.”

“I have a feeling that this sort of thing happens more than you know.”

“I sincerely hope not.” Mark said, finally finishing his glass. “But, I intend to find out.”

“I’d appreciate any information that you can give me.”

“I’ll see what I can do, but for now, you need to speak to Donna.”

“Donna? The psychiatrist?”

“Yes. Kylie was staying with her through her treatment. If there is anyone who cares more about Kylie than you, it would be her.”

“I...I never thought to reach out to her.”

“Why would you? You couldn’t have known that she was in charge of your daughter’s care.”

“And she can help?”

“She can’t hurt. I’m sure she’d like to talk to you about Kylie’s progress.” Mark stood up, tossing a handful of bills on the table. “Oh, and about Sarah…”

Lori looked up at him with a smile. “Who?”

Mark nodded, a solemn gesture to the new status quo. Lori had proven herself to be a formidable opponent and Mark left the restaurant with more questions than answers. Her intimate knowledge of company secrets wasn’t as alarming as the suspected use of one of those secrets. There was a plainly specific line that had been drawn in the sand and someone or someones were skirting the rules for their own personal gain. Or pride. The rules had been bent too many times before and many truths had been covered up, but what Lori had implied was a new level of depravity that not even Mark could safely stomach. He had to find answers and he knew that Moira would be the first to speak with on his list. More disturbing to him, however, was the usage of a name he hadn’t heard in years. A name and a mistake he would never forget.

Part Two: House of Cards

Isaac Summers was living his best life. His dirty secret had come out and he’d never been happier. His boss, both at work and at home, had taken him from a scared, creepy young man to a less scared and certainly less creepy man. He had been given a chance to live out his most perverted fantasies, even if they were relatively mild, and in doing so, gained much more respect and appreciation for women.

He showed his appreciation to Lori by being the best housekeeper he could. He was used to cleaning his grandmother’s house to help her out so he knew his way around a mop and bucket. The difference between Lori and his grandmother was how he dressed and how she behaved when she got home from work.

The small footlocker in his closet was a testament to his new lifestyle. Gone were all of his boy clothes, replaced with various panties, thongs, and tights. Hanging in the closet above the footlocker were his normal attire, maid outfits, short dresses, and other girl’s clothes. He had some normal clothes, jeans and shirts, but they were bought in girl’s sizes and were a tight fit. Lori had been put off by his desire to wear girl’s clothes all the time but he said that they would help him remember his place. A small framed, effeminate looking man, it wasn’t much of a stretch to think that he could pass as a girl, just with short hair. In truth, he would be welcomed as a transitioning person, although he had no interest in such. He didn’t want to be a girl, just forced to dress like one.

Perhaps, though, the biggest change was the one that no one else would ever know about. As Lori’s live in maid/ boy toy, he was barred from any personal pleasure. A sexual release needed to be earned through servitude to the house and his Goddess.

Goddess. His thoughts of her were always pleasant. No matter what she put him through, or what she demanded, he never felt any ill feelings towards her. He took great pride in his submission. She had given him a purpose and he held her in the highest regard because of it.

He sent her a morning’s greetings, like he always did. He only had her number in his phone, per her request, and set about getting dressed. He slept naked, as he was trained to do, so his attire for the day was fresh and clean. Sometimes, she would tell him what to wear, or have it laid out for him, but this morning, there was nothing. She had been terribly distracted last night over something that she didn’t explain to him. He was used to it, though. He picked out his panties for the day, a silky black pair, some booty shorts, and a baby tee. He felt strange, laying the garments out on her bed. It was the same feeling he got every day. He knew what he was doing wasn’t normal, but at the same time, he felt that satisfying rush knowing what he was about to do.

He took a picture of the clothes and sent them to Lori, same as he did every day. He picked them up and headed for the shower. He stopped at the door to the bathroom and looked down the hall. There was a room at the end of the hall that he was forbidden from going near. The door was locked and he couldn’t see anything through the keyhole. Lori would go into the room every now and then, but he was not allowed in. He wondered what was in there and why it was worth guarding so closely.

His phone pinged, shaking him from his thoughts. Lori had responded far faster than she normally did. Her words were short, but powerful.

No shorts. Dress. Collar. Plug.

The physical side of their relationship. His pleasure was in serving her and being humiliated, something that Lori had managed to do in spades. He had gotten rather adept at using his tongue and she made sure that he got a lot of practice. For him, again, his depravity set the tone. While he hadn’t had any movies to mimic, his search history had led Lori to find out that pegging was something that he was interested in. He had asked for a collar whenever she had plans on bringing toys into the bedroom. It helped him keep his mind in the right place.

What a place it was. There was something about having the weight of it around his neck all day. It had a small ring on it, right at the center that hovered over his throat. They had talked about adding a leash but hadn’t gotten there yet. He returned to his closet and put the short and tee shirt away. Lori demanded order and cleanliness, without question.

Under Lori’s bed was a small chest and in that chest were the tools of his subjugation. He ignored most of them and focused on the one he was commanded to grab. Stainless steel, cool to the touch, with nothing resembling subtlety, it was as shiny as it was rigid. He pulled the pink dog collar out of the chest and added it to the other items in his hand. He carried his dress by the hanger slung over his shoulder and headed back to the bathroom.

He ran a bath and grabbed a razor. He contemplated his life as he shaved his legs. If anyone had asked him a few months ago if he would be shaving his legs so that he was clean and smooth for his Goddess, he would have thought them crazy. He couldn’t believe where his life had ended up and wondered where it would finally end up. Was this all that he had? Was being a maid for Lori going to last forever? He didn’t know and frankly, he didn’t care. Cleaning in a maid’s outfit with a collar around his neck, a plug in his rear, and his manhood caged was one of his best fantasies. To live it was something beyond his wildest dreams and he wasn’t going to give it up for anything.

He drained the tub and finished his shower, feeling refreshed. He slowly dried off, making sure he got all of his places. He stepped into the panties and pulled them up to his thighs. He slipped the plug into his mouth, lubing it up before slowly working it into his body. He took a moment to get used to it before he resumed getting dressed. He let the hemline of the dress fall around his knees and reached for the collar. He could easily ignore most of the things he put on his body, but not the collar. Once around his neck, he pushed the connectors together and shuddered at the sound of the plastic clip clicking closed. It’s reassuring weight and the tightness around his neck instantly put him in the right mindset. He looked at himself in the mirror, barely recognizing himself, before he did a small curtsy. His visage and the fullness he felt in his rear reinforced the lifestyle he had wanted for so long.

He didn’t have any more time to dwell on things though. There were things to be done, and he had to get dinner started. He loved cooking and was fairly good at it. Even if the relationship fell apart, he had gained a lot of culinary skill. Lori had said once that he would make someone a good sissy housewife one day. He had been upset about being called a sissy, but being verbally degraded was a part of his kink so he grew to accept it. He wondered if anyone would ever accept him outside of Lori, but such was the life of someone with too much time to think.

He took a picture of himself and sent it to his Goddess. She would respond in time, but until then, he had work to do. The life of a sissy maid was never done and he was a good sissy maid.

Leah Hammond, Kylie’s roommate from college was ecstatic to finally be home for summer break. It had been a long semester, far too long considering how much she had procrastinated. She had barely gotten her assignments in before the exams and a long, arduous week of cramming was required to make sure she passed them. She knew that it was her own fault; if only she had  not spent so much time partying and hooking up. She had had fun though, and that was all that mattered. College was an experience, not just a chore and she was one year closer to her degree. Her parents would be proud and as she drove home from her dorm, she knew that their pride was the only thing they needed to know.

In the bag seat of her car, among all of her clothes, were Kylie Gillis’ belongings. Kylie had gone home for break after the first semester and hadn’t returned for the second. It wasn’t unusual for a first year college student, but it was unusual to leave all of her belongings behind. Leah, who was from the same city as Kylie, just on the opposite end of town, did the responsible friend thing and brought all of Kylie’s stuff home with her.

She fully intended to use Kylie’s stuff as a way to check on her roommate. She felt a kinship bond with the younger girl, as they shared the same secret. Kylie was just coming into herself and in a few years, with some confidence under her skirt, she’d be fine.

Leah had managed to get Kylie’s address from one of the nerds working in the student services office of the college. He had been a little adamant about what he wanted and with a little coercion, they had managed to barter his price for such information. A cinofile, the nerd wanted one thing from her, and it wasn’t, surprisingly, sex. He wanted to go with her while she shopped and tried on swimsuits. She wondered if he was trying to make some type of nerd fueled  montage in his head, but it was a small price to pay. Plus, he was nice, respective, and he even bought her an outfit. She friended him on social media just so that he could boast to his friends and she secretly thought that he may be interested enough for a hookup.

Back in the real world, Leah sang along to the songs streaming from her phone through her car speakers. Single, sexy, and independant, Leah didn’t care how she looked to the people she passed by. All they would see is a young woman enjoying her music, not the padded secret she hid under her leggings. She would go home and unpack her stuff, spend some time with her family, and look into tracking Kylie down. She had an address, but none of her texts had been answered all semester. She was worried, but tried to keep her thoughts of the worst possible circumstances under control.

Her house looked slightly different than she remembered. Her mother had mentioned that her father had talked about doing some remodeling. He was a carpenter by trade; her mother a retired education administrator, living off of some well timed stock payoffs and their savings, they were ready to make the house they had raised a family in their retirement home.

She got out of her car to the squeals of joy as her parents rushed out of the house to greet her. An only child, Leah had been doted upon by her parents, although, not to a degree where she was spoiled. “Just better off.” Her father would say and the subtext of his statement held true. While she had nice things growing up, she never had the newest, best, or most popular item. She was raised to care about her appearance and how she presented herself to the world, to which she had obviously rebelled against once she got to college.

Her parents hugged her several times, essentially passing her back and forth between the two of them, before her father began helping her unload the bags and cases from her car.

Her mother followed her upstairs to her room with several small bags in their hands while her father dug out the heavier items. She stood in the doorway to her room and took pause. Things felt different although they looked the same.

“You can really feel it, can’t you?” Her mother asked.

“Feel what?”

“Things aren’t the same, right?”

“No, I guess that they aren’t.”

“Is that bad?”

Leah was silent for a moment, thinking. “I don’t think so. I mean, it’s not like the whole world changed.”

“No. Your room is the same. It’s you that have changed.”

“Is it that noticeable?”

Her mother laughed. “Leah, I gave birth to you. I’ve seen you grow from a cute little baby to a blossoming young woman. I know when something is different with you.”

“That’s not an answer.”

Her mother smiled. “It’s a mom answer. All that matters is that you are happy with the person that you are.”

“I am.”

“And that you were safe.”

“Mother!”

“A mother worries. There is no stopping it. And you know that it’s easier to talk to me about these things than your father.”

“If he had his way, I’d have never left the house.”

“Exactly. So, were you safe?”

“Yes. And that’s all I’m going to say about it.”

“Fair enough. Just know that if you need anything to continue being safe, you just need to let me know.”

“I’m sure that I can manage by myself.”

“I know you can, but you mom still wants to feel needed every now and then.” She set the bags down and kissed Leah on the forehead. “I’m so proud of you, sweetheart. Welcome home!”

“Thanks mom. I love you too.”

They heard her dad struggling to get one of her small desks up the stairs and smiled at each other. Her mother went to help her husband while Leah moved the bags out of the way, tossing the ones with her private effects into the closet. She would track Kylie down another time, but for now, she wanted to get back into the swing of being home.

Mark swiped his ID badge against the card reader. His meeting with Lori had rattled him and he needed answers. The door slid open and it briefly reminded him of the sci-fi shows he used to watch. His mouth cracked to a slight smile and faded just as fast as he put on his game face. Nearly everyone who was anyone knew his name and he carried an air of respect wherever he went. He marched through the foyer and into the Institute proper. He didn’t bother to stop at the front desk, nor was he approached about why he was there. The security guard, Dave, waved briefly to him as he passed by, heading for the employee section. There were layers to everything at the Institute. The public could see, on any given day, one or two of the layers, the employees maybe got to five or six, but the executives, they were the only ones who could see the majority of the company. Department heads had their own secrets, as did division leads. Layers upon layers of lies and misinformation. A castle of cards, threatening to fall.

Mark stormed through the employee areas, heading deep into the facility. Research and development would be too easy, he thought. If I were going to keep something off the books, I’d bury it deep in the sublevels. No sense in looking all around for it just yet. If she knows, she’ll have her usual tell.

Mark headed for Moira’s private elevator. Only a handful of people outside of the board had permission to use it so he knew that it would be unguarded. It had a button for every floor, plus the one extra for Moira’s floor. Why she needed an entire floor of a building that size to herself was beyond him. No one really knew what she did with all of that space. As large as her office was, it was nowhere near the right amount of square footage. Some speculated that she had the rest of the space made out to be her home so that she never truly left her company. Others figured that it was storage or something mundane that wasn’t worth talking about. Unless Project Womb was on her floor, which was unlikely considering the technicians and support staff required to run it, then the excess space was of no consequence.

The elevator hummed to a stop and the door slid open. As expected, he was greeted by her personal secretary who took one look at him before waving him forward. He was used to not being questioned, and sometimes, there were perks to his position.

Moira was sitting at her desk, a scowl already on her face. Mark wasn’t sure if he’d ever seen her smiling, as most of the time, she bore the look of disappointment. He wanted to attribute most of her demeanor to her position and her responsibilities but he firmly believed that she was just a bitter person with a worse attitude.

“And to what do I owe the pleasure of your company this afternoon?” She said curtly.

“I can’t come visit an old colleague?” Mark replied innocently.

“You rarely consider yourself my colleague and are even less apt to visit.” Moira retorted.

“As standoffish and confrontational as always I see.”

“I’m a busy woman, Mark, and I don’t have time for idle chatter.”

“Then I’ll get right to the point. Special Project #5.”

“What about it?”

“I do believe that it has been shelved.”

“It has.”

“Then why am I hearing that it is not?”

“You should check your sources before making presumptions.”

“I trust the source. What I don’t trust is your deflecting.”

“Your trust isn’t necessary. All I need is your compliance.”

“Watch your tone, Moira. I am not some pencil pushing lackey that you can order around. Project Womb was shelved and for all of this time, I had heard nothing about it, and then after what happened not that long ago, I am hearing whispers. I don’t like whispers and I don’t like the thought of the council’s decision being subverted due to personal reasons.”

“Fine. I’ll humor your little crusade. What reasons would you think this department would have that would justify what you are insinuating?”

“That was the easy part. Pride. This department boasts the only perfect record in the company and now, as far as I know, that record has been tarnished by Ms. Carver’s actions.”

“And you presume to think that I am prideful enough to do anything and everything I can to preserve that reputation?”

“Can you prove me wrong?” Mark asked. “I haven’t done any more digging than coming to see you. As your friend and colleague, I felt it best to give you a chance to explain the situation one way or another.”

“Then you are not convinced that it even exists, or have no proof either way.”

“Looking for proof implies suspicion of guilt. The way you are defensive leads me to believe that you are hiding something and rather than just explain your side of the situation, you are trying to deter me from looking any farther.”

Moira paused, feeling the weight of her actions across her shoulders. She knew then what she knew now; no secret stays buried forever. She sighed and looked at Mark, contemplating how best to appeal to him.

“The project works. What was theoretical has been made reality and we have found ways to offset the costs of operation.”

“The board was clear that we were going no farther. It was a dead end.”

“It was, for a while, and I started R&D back up on it as a side project, off the books. It’s a brilliant idea and too good of an intellectual property to let collect dust.”

“And the test subjects?”

“We knew that we were never going to find volunteers. We needed a drastic case to get the proof of concept that the board wanted. Coincidently, your idea of long term sensory deprivation was the springboard we needed.”

“You’re saying that I inadvertently volunteered those two girls to be your lab rats?”

“Yes. And no. We seized upon the opportunity that little fiasco provided and made the best out of the situation.”

“How long?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“How long were they in there?”

“Were?” Moira sneered. She knew quite well what she was saying and what she had done.

Mark’s face paled. “It’s not possible!”

“Oh, but it is. We solved all of the problems that we needed to solve before the project got canned and currently we are 21 days and counting with no problems.”

“Except psychological.”

“That remains to be seen. What we do know is that we are well on track for the 21/90 habit break and we can begin a true reform.”

“At what cost?”

“That’s the thing with testing. We won’t know until it’s time.”

“And you are arbitrarily deciding what time? Do you understand how cruel that is?”

“It’s not cruel, it’s for the greater good.”

“I didn’t realize that our clients volunteered to be in the oligarchy.”

“Isn’t a corporation an oligarchy? Some volunteered, some are here because they need to be.”

“So why didn’t you take one of them? Are you that insecure that you have to maintain total dominion over everyone and everything?”

“They were the most likely candidates. You have to remember how far they were into the program and how close they both were to a total rejection. I had to do something! Not to mention that if I hadn’t gone this route, we could be facing a lawsuit or grand jury inquiry as to how we function. Do not forget that much of what we do here hasn’t been approved by the Public Health Administration. Let’s not mention the other things we have had to conceal from the public eye.”

“So dig a deeper hole to hide the truth?”

“Do you really want the truth to come out, after everything you’ve done? It won’t just be my ass in a sling if this all goes south.”

“The entire house of cards will come crashing down.”

“Exactly.”

Mark thought for a bit. There was a lot riding on how he dealt with what he had just been told.

“I want to see them.”

“You would lose your plausible deniability.”

“I have much to lose either way. At least this way, we can work together in their best interests.”

“As you wish.” She stood up from her desk and he followed her to the elevator. He was fuming inside but he knew enough to not show it. She had made a lot of sense and he wanted to see firsthand if she was telling the truth. He hated having to keep so many lies and secrets but knew that if he wanted to keep his lifestyle, and his freedom, that he didn’t have much of a choice.

They took the elevator down to the sub basement. He had guessed correctly that she had buried her lies but what surprised him was when she headed straight towards a blank section of wall. She pressed a section of wall inward and a square opening collapsed into the wall. It slid up by mechanical means and behind it was a digital handprint pad. She held her left hand on it and stood there as the machine read her biometrics. The machine beeped and the solid wall split, sliding to the right and revealing a hidden laboratory.

Mark followed her inside and the door slid quietly closed behind them. She walked briskly along the catwalk and after passing many bays of computers, the room opened up. In the center of the large room were seven semi-spherical pods in a row. Various machines were connected to the pods and it looked as if most of the pods were in use. Technicians were checking numerous readouts, dials, and gauges. It looked like it was running like a well oiled machine.

Everyone seemed to acknowledge Moira’s presence but no one said anything. She led Mark down closer to the pods and they stopped at the third one. Through the small viewing screen Mark could see the faint outline of Kylie’s face.

“You can tell your source that her daughter is fine.”

Mark said nothing, but continued to look into the pod. He was trying to find some sign of distress or physical manifestation of trauma. He wasn’t naive enough to think that Moira was oblivious to the workings of her subordinates.

“Does she know what’s going on?” He asked, ignoring the statement.

“Perhaps, but anything she knows is coming across as dreams.” Moira pointed to one of the screens nearby. “She’s in stage five of the sleep cycle. We try to keep them from waking up too much. Although we do allow for periods of partial consciousness. That way we can mitigate any long term physical or psychological effects.”

“Do you let them out?”

“Heavens no. Letting them out defeats the purpose. These two have been in here for 21 days. The others….longer. How long is irrelevant. The point is, the program works for it’s desired purpose.”

“Have you tried reintegration?”

“Not yet.”

“When do you think it’ll be time?”

“Well, that’s up to you.”

“How so?”

“Reintegration is a huge step, and one with a lot of potential complications. I would like you to consider having them with you but with a caveat.”

“There is always a catch with you, isn’t there?”

“Perhaps.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“Bring Donna back. They need her and she needs them. If she agrees to return, I will feel better about releasing the girls to your care.”

“My care alone?”

“Your care for the interim. Once ready to function as they should, walk, talk, that sort of thing, then they would be moved to her and then they can finish the program.”

“There are a lot of variables in that plan.”

“Indeed. However, this all started with you, it seems only fitting that it ends with you.

Besides, it’s been a while since you’ve taken a new client in. I’m sure Apple will be delighted.”

“You know that I don’t normally deal with clients needing this level of care.”

“Oh, I’m aware, but for those in your charge, it will be a good reminder of what’s at stake. Hopefully, we can salvage something positive from this debacle and get back to doing what we do best.”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

“They will be delivered by the end of next week.”

“You’re not giving me a choice?”

“Were you going to refuse?”

“No. Not if this is what it takes to wash my hands of this culpability.”

“I didn’t think so. Find Donna, and let me know what she says. Mark, I need you to make this happen. For all of our sakes and the continuation of this company. If you are successful then everything we’ve been building towards will finally be realized.”

“Just remember not to choke on your aspirations, Moira.” Mark said, turning away from her and heading back towards the elevator. He wasn’t too sure how he got roped into everything, and he would have to find a better way to explain himself than just covering his ass, but he knew that if he hadn’t let himself get coerced, there were three lives hanging in the balance. Two young girls and one dear friend who needed each other more than Moira or the Institute were willing to admit.

Part Three: Daddy's Girl

She was awake before the alarm. She always was. It had been this way for as long as she could remember. She rolled out of bed and stretched. She reached for the alarm and shut it off, stretching again. She had a few minutes before her routine kicked in and she took that time to take care of her personal needs. There were days, like today, when she had such a luxury, and there were days when she didn’t. She ran a brush through her long, brown hair. It hung down to the middle of her back and she kept it as tidy as possible. A tidy appearance was one of the things he expected of her, among the multitude of other expectations. She changed out of her nightgown and into some jeans and a tight tee shirt. Her wardrobe, much like the rest of her life, was not up to her.

From the bedroom, she headed down the hall and towards the basement. While her wellbeing was of importance, what was kept in the basement was paramount. She unlocked the door and turned on the light. She descended the stairs, the click of her shoes echoing on the hardwood steps. She didn’t stop at the bottom of the stairs, like pretty much everything in her life, she was caught in a never ending cycle. It didn’t phase her in the slightest. The routine and the monotony used to, but it had been so long since there was any variation that she had just accepted her life as what it was.

She continued from the stairs and round the corner. The four adult sized cribs, two of which were occupied, sat in the middle of the floor. The familiar rectangular lines that she had seen in so many other places surrounded the cribs. She pressed two buttons on the wall by the large whiteboard. It was squared off with 35 squares, like a calendar with an extra week. To the side of the days, were the color coded names of the two crib occupants, and two colors left for the empty beds. On each day, there were markings associated with a code that everyone in the house knew all too well. The buttons raised the soundproof glass around the two cribs and she walked over to them. The two girls in the cribs were awake but didn’t do anything. The woman lowered the bars on the first crib and the young girl watched her as she reached out, pulling at the leg holes of the diaper that the young girl wore. The woman pulled at the back to inspect for messes before squeezing the front for wetness. She walked back to the board and made a W on the square for the day next to the girl’s color. She went to the other crib and repeated the process. She checked thoroughly before returning to the board and writing a D next to the second girl’s color.

Satisfied, she went over to the cupboard and pulled it open. Inside were stacks and stacks of adult sized diapers in various sizes and colors as well as copious amounts of pull ups. There was only one style of regular girl’s underpants in the cupboard and she grabbed a fresh diaper and a pair of white cotton underpants. She handed the diaper to the girl that was wet and the underpants to the girl that was dry.

She snapped her fingers and pointed, causing the girls to carry their new garments and head to the door at the back of the room. Inside was an overly large bathtub and a toilet. The dry girl stood at the toilet while the wet one stood by the tub. The girls raised their hands above their heads while the woman undid their diapers. She ran them a bath while they finished getting undressed. When the tub was full, she motioned for the girls to get in and wash. It was, after all, the routine. She picked out their clothes while they played in the bubbly water. Uncompromising structure. That’s all they knew and it was all by design.

Clean and dressed, with the wet girl having to lay down on the floor while Apple put her in a diaper, the girls followed the woman upstairs where everything appeared to be as normal as any other house. They went to the kitchen and the woman began preparing them breakfast. The girls sat at the table, waiting patiently.

“Carmen, you have to work today at 9, Tonya, you go in at 11. I want you two to be on your best behavior today.”

“Yes, Apple, we will. Will you tell Daddy that I was a good girl?”

“You know as well as I do that Daddy inspects you every morning and checks the board every night. He will know if you’ve been a good girl.”

“I know, but I want Daddy to be proud of me. I’m trying really hard.”

“I know you are, Carmen, and he notices.”

“I’m trying too! It’s just so hard when we have to go to be so early!” Tonya whined.

“Now, Tonya, you know that I don’t approve of that tone.” Apple said. While she was part instructor, she was also part disciplinarian.

“Sorry, mommy.” Tonya said meekly.

“It’s fine. Finish your breakfast and we will get ready to take you to work.”

The girls ate without further conversation. They knew the rules. They had been there long enough to have learned that lesson and they had been given plenty of opportunities. Apple was a firm and rigid caretaker, as Carmen and Tonya had experienced, but she paled in comparison to Daddy.

Daddy was, if they had anything to compare him to, the worst person imaginable. For Carmen and Tonya, Daddy was the final hurdle of their rehabilitation. They had passed through every other test, but until they had his blessing, they were stuck living in his baby centric world. Daddy was strict, unflinching, and in some cases, cruelly brutal. They had come to stay with Daddy after they had finished with their first respective caretakers. While they had accepted who they were, how they came to be a part of the program, and what it meant for them, they had never met anyone like him.

Tonya had come to him first. She had become a happy baby, fully embracing her retraining. She had become accustomed to her diapers and how she was going to be treated, but all of that went out the window far quicker than she thought. Daddy’s rules weren’t unfair, but there was no flexibility with his training. Where their previous caretakers were regressing them, Daddy’s job was to instill in them the new way they would be thinking and behaving. Just as they had been trained to embrace their diapers, Daddy wanted them out of them and back into big girl panties as quickly as possible. Potty training was something that was far harder to instill than they thought, as any and all mistakes or accidents meant that they had to start over, returned back to diapers, and all progress had to be earned again.

What that meant was they had to go all night without any leaks or messes, not even a dribble or streak, and then all day staying perfectly clean while being on a strict bathroom regiment. It was brutally unfair, and there were many, many times where the girls were going to work and out in public, fully diapered. Each and every time they made a mistake, they had to spend a full week back in diapers, fully babied, before they could try again. From diapers, they went to pull ups and were treated like toddlers. From pull ups, they could graduate to cotton panties. Daddy’s rules grew more strict as they moved up from babyhood. He wouldn’t have much to say when he was changing their diapers at the pharmacy where they worked, or at home, as babies were expected to mess their diapers. However, if they were caught with dirty pull ups or panties, they were immediately and heartlessly spanked until they were reduced to tears, put back in diapers, and then, depending on the severity of the offence, were kept as babies for no less than a week or as long as a month. It was especially torturous when they made a mistake in their panties, as they would have to spend a month back in diapers, a month in pull ups, and then, and only if they were really good, they could get their panties back. To make the humiliation worse, Daddy would check them in the most embarrassing ways, which could be anywhere and for any reason. Every night, they would have to present themselves, stripped down to just their diaper, pull up, or panty, and be inspected by his hands alone.

Their behavior and performance at work and home were also taken into account as well. They had chores and tasks around the house, to teach them to be good housewives or home keepers, as well as how they carried themselves at the pharmacy. Any complaint or critique was met with strict punishment, usually of the corporal nature, and extra chores or tasks.

While Tonya had it bad, Carmen had gotten it the worst. Her ideology made obeying Daddy difficult as she didn’t believe in the idea of male superiority. She had dug in her heels a lot in the beginning but slowly but surely, she realized that the only way she was ever going to escape his patriarchal hold over her life and her body was to do what he wanted. That realization hadn’t come until nearly a year in his care, as she had slowly lost her will to fight him on such skewed terms. Time and time again, he would break her. Her backtalk was met with mouth soaping, her aggression or physical displays got her spanked, and any egregious infractions earned her time in solitary. She equated it to slavery or torture but with each experience and the lecture that followed, she slowly began to realize that all of her misery was self inflicted. The rules were simple, and breaking them was a choice.

Carmen was on her fifth attempt at her freedom. She had kept her panties dry and clean for three and a half weeks. She was a few days from getting his seal of approval and there was nothing that was going to stand in her way of finally going home. Tonya, however, was not. Her wet diaper this morning meant that she was going back to the beginning when Daddy found out. Apple wasn’t in control of what happened to Tonya when she broke the rules, she just enforced what Daddy said.

Apple drove the minivan with practiced precision. In the backseat, sat Carmen and Tonya in car seats. Custom built as complete replacements for the standard bucket seats in the second row, and to each individual occupant, they secured to the floor of the van as if they were designed by the car manufacturer themselves. They were a topic of much resistance when the girls were first shown them, but now, they were just another cog in the wheel of their rehabilitation. Between the seats was the ever present diaper bag, both as a reminder of their lives and as a threat to behave.

She pulled into the parking lot of the pharmacy and brought the van to a stop near the back loading docks. His office was just off of the receiving platform and it was more convenient for the girls to drop off their stuff there, not that they were allowed to carry much. A purse for their personal effects and that was it, everything else, including toiletries, was kept in a locker in Daddy’s office. In the back of his office, behind a locked door was a small room, large enough to hold a twin sized bed. Daddy called it his Quiet Room.

Every girl grew to know that small room by a different name, a far more ominous name. The Red Room. Red, because if there was a reason that they needed to be in there, it was to be changed, and far more likely, spanked. That didn’t know if he got off on it, but over the knee, bare bottom spankings were his go to form of behavior correction. The room’s walls were padded and anyone who worked there but was not living with Daddy at the moment knew better than to question any noise they heard. They avoided his office almost entirely, keeping their personal effects in the staff lounge and only talking to him when he wasn’t in his office.

Apple undid the restraints that secured Carmen and Tonya in their car seats. The girls got themselves out of their seats, as it would have been too hard for Apple to lift them out herself. While it all seemed to be excessive, there was a point to it all. They had to wait to get out because they needed permission from their caregiver and had to wait until they got it. It was to teach them patience as well as test how urgent their need for the potty was. Vernacular was changed, the toilet or bathroom was changed to potty. Things like that. Childlike phrases and words were expected of them.

With the girls getting out of the van, Apple grabbed the diaper bag and slung it over her shoulder. The bag was white with pink elephants all over it, which stood in stark contrast to the earthy tones that Apple wore. It was discreet enough to not draw immediate attention, but also obvious enough to warrant a few raised eyebrows. She led the girls to the back door and swiped her keycard, unlocking the door with a beep. She pulled it open and the girls walked in, heading straight for Daddy’s office as they had been trained to do. Tonya was fidgeting, clearly nervous about not waking up dry this morning and knowing that a trip to the Red Room was in her near future. Carmen was happily sauntering around with a little bounce in her step. She was proud of herself and eagerly awaited the end of the week when she could, if she stayed good, get to finally go home.

“How are my girls today?” Daddy asked, glancing at them as they walked into his office.

“I’m good, Daddy!” Carmen said, her voice teeming with excitement.

“I’m glad to hear it. And you, Tonya?”

“I’m….okay…”

Daddy stopped scrolling through the pharmacy’s inventory to turn and look at his girls. He glanced at Apple, who just nodded. Apple opened the diaper bag and began to restock the locker while the girls faced Daddy.

“I see. Inspection time, then?”

The girls nodded, one happily, the other, not. Carmen boldly undid her slacks and pulled them down to her ankles. She waddled over to Daddy and spread her legs slightly, as she had been trained, as was expected. He knew from first glance that she had been a good girl, but he reveled in the fact of how eagerly she presented herself to him. She was close to finishing her training and she was doing rather well.

“Dry again? What a good girl.” Daddy proclaimed as he slid his fingers up her inner thighs, cupping her sex as his other hand squeezed her butt.

“Thank you, Daddy. I’m trying realwwy hard to be a good girl.” She couldn’t help slip into a childlike voice or the baby talk. Part of the reason she had come to him was her childhood trauma, and her defence mechanism could be easily triggered by a man’s hands in her private area.

“You have done really well, Carmen. I am very proud of you. A few more days to go and you can go home. Would you like that?” He was rubbing her, deliberately making her wet. A cruel reward for making him proud.

“Y-yes...Daddy.” She stammered, trying to stand still as he played with her. She wouldn’t be allowed to finish, and she knew it, but that didn’t stop his touches from feeling amazing. She wiggled and squirmed in his hands, her heart rate skyrocketing and her breathing turning rampant. She ground herself into his fingers, edging him on and trying to find release. He smiled at the display before pulling his hand away and slapping her bottom.

“Now, now. You still have work to do. Go ask Apple for a fresh pair of panties and clock in. I want you to grab the planogram for aisle eight and check it over.”

She moaned and sighed, letting out a slow exhale. The front of her cotton panties were damp and sticky. She looked at Apple with a pleading look. She didn’t have to say anything as Apple was already prepared. She unlocked the Red Room and handed Carmen a pair of clean panties. Carmen took them with a smile and closed the door behind her.

Daddy turned his attention to Tonya, who was trying to shrink into oblivion. Her face was already red, and there were tears starting to form in the corner of her eyes. She tried to look away from him but knew that avoidance only made things worse. Daddy hated dishonesty, and hiding things from him was essentially lying. All of her training reminded her that the only way to make things easier on herself was to be upfront about it. She didn’t have to say anything, her appearance alone was all the information he needed, but she had to follow through. She sniffled as she undid her pants, wiggling them down over the bulk of her plain white diaper.

“My my, again, Tonya?”

“I’m trying, Daddy, I really am!”

“I see. Well, you do know the rules. So you know what’s coming. It’ll be a month for you this time and to really drive the point home, I will be the only one to change you.”

Her jaw dropped and the tears fell. He worked a lot and Apple was her primary caregiver, so him being the only one to change her meant that she had to go all night and all morning until she got to work before she got changed. Which meant that she would likely end up with a rash and be utterly miserable. All of that was secondary to what else was coming. Bottles, bibs, and binkies. High chairs, humiliation, and hopelessness. Diapers, pampers, and nappies. Spoon feedings, swaddling, and spankings. Everything that could and would make her feel as infantile as possible was going to be used.

She sniffled again and nodded. There was no use in fighting him. She had tried, over and over again, not to the degree that Carmen had fought, and Tonya often wondered if Carmen had betrayed her principles in exchange for her freedom. Carmen had gone from being far more troublesome than Tonya had, and yet, she was closer to going home than Tonya was. Her mistake last night set her back another three months at least.

To rub it all in, Carmen came out of the Red Room with a wide smile on her face. She had only been in there for a few minutes, but she was still happy. She was dressed and Tonya could see that Carmen had left her damp panties on the bed. She didn’t want to know what was going to happen to them when they went to work. She could imagine Daddy sitting in there, deeply inhaling Carmen’s scent. She shuddered at the thought.

She was startled from her thoughts by Daddy’s hands snaking between her legs and pulling her closer to him. She looked down at him as he pulled up her pants, wiggling them over her diaper. He buttoned them together and patted her on the butt.

“I’m going to change your schedule today. You are going to go on errands with Apple today. Since you insist on being a baby, then you don’t need to work.” He turned to Apple.

“Make sure that she’s got the proper attire.”

Apple nodded and pulled out a few things from the diaper bag. She handed them to Daddy one by one, and he put them on Tonya. First came the mittens, because babies don’t know how to use their hands. Then the oversized binky that filled her entire mouth and would cause her to drool, because babies don’t talk. At last, was a bib and a bonnet, to remind her of her new place. Tears ran slowly down her face as she felt the floodgates open and the front of her diaper swell as the warm liquid flooded it. It was the first of many, and with his rule, she would have to sit in for another eight or so hours.

“Apple, I need you to run some errands for me.” He said, no longer interested in Tonya. “I submitted a list to the grocer, so you can pick that up, but more importantly, I need you to head to this address and talk to an old friend of mine. Tell her that I sent you and that she is cordially invited to a dinner at our house.”

“Yes, Sir.” Apple said. She never questioned anything and he never explained himself.

Orders were to be followed, not thought about.

“Also, she doesn’t get changed until I get home, no matter what, am I understood?” “Yes, Sir.”

“That’s what I like to hear. On your way, now.”

“Yes, Sir.” Apple slung the empty diaper bag over her shoulder again, took Tonya by the hand, and headed out of his office. Carmen didn’t say anything as she touched up her makeup before heading out towards the selling floor.

Mark leaned back in his chair, pleased with himself. He watched via video camera as Carmen walked through the store, her tight, firm ass swaying ever so nicely. He had raised her well, and he was proud of her accomplishments. He pulled his gaze away from her to the other workers in the store. Some were girls that he had raised, still employed by him because they liked the job and were comfortable, and still others who were oblivious to the hidden world tucked right under their noses and he liked it that way.

Tonya pouted in her car seat. Apple had driven her around for most of the day, running errands for Daddy. She followed his orders and left the bib, bonnet, and binky in place while she drug Tonya around. It was humiliating to be led through various stores and having to deal with all the strange looks and hushed comments. Apple was oblivious to it all as this wasn’t the first time she had had to do something like this, and certainly not the first with Tonya. While appearing cruel and a form of sadism, it also taught her a valuable lesson. The vast majority of people barely paid others any mind at all, no matter how strange or peculiar they looked, and, as Daddy would put it, “Babies are supposed to look like babies. If you are going to behave the part, you are going to look the part.”

The errands had wound down, and they were driving out away from the city to a higher end suburb. They didn’t pull into any gated communities, but instead into an apartment complex.

Apple pulled the car to a stop and looked at her phone. Daddy wasn’t too keen on any of his girls having phones, but Apple had proven herself to be trustworthy.

Tonya mumbled something behind her binky, a line of drool flowing down her lip into her bib. The bib was soaked through, much like the swollen mass in her pants. She desperately wanted a change but knew that she wasn’t getting one and it made her irritable. She got a glance from Apple but no acknowledgment or sympathy of her situation. Apple seemed preoccupied with her phone but after a moment, she slid her phone into her purse before getting out of the van. She opened the sliding door on the van and undid Tonya’s safety harness. She helped Tonya get out of the van.

“You need to be on your best behavior here. This is one of Daddy’s friends, who does the same job Daddy does and has permission to punish you if they see fit. And no, you will not get a change.”

Tonya garbled something else and looked anxious. There were few things as humiliating as having her wet diaper pulled down to be spanked, and having pulled back up once the punishment had been administered. What would be worse is the punishment she would get from Daddy afterwards. She gulped as best as she could and followed Apple into the complex. They rode up the elevator next to a young couple that regarded Tonya with much disgust. Many couldn’t handle seeing any fetish material out in the open. They hurriedly exited the elevator the moment they could and Tonya whined. She hated being paraded around.

When they arrived at the correct floor, Apple led Tonya to the right and down the hall, looking at every room number as they passed it. When she stopped, Tonya almost walked into her. Apple tentatively knocked on the door and they waited for a moment.

The door swung open and Apple did a slight bow.

“Apple? What a pleasant surprise! Come in, come in!” The door opened wider and Apple and Tonya stepped into the entryway. The door closed behind them and Tonya could rest a little bit easier. “What brings you to my neck of the woods? More importantly, how did you find me?”

“He told me. He gave me the exact directions.”

The woman sighed. “Typical. Just can’t leave well enough alone. Anyway, that’s between him and I. Come on in and have a seat, Apple.” She led them to the living area and sat down, gesturing towards the couch. She took a glance at Tonya and waited.

“On the floor, Tonya. We don’t want you leaking all over the sofa.” Tonya whimpered but sank to the floor by Apple’s legs.

“He’s still using his methods I see. How many times has this for her?”

“I believe it’s the fifth time. She just went back to babyhood today.”

“For how long this time?”

“A month.”

“And then a month after that, and another month after that. I can’t say that I agree with his system. If you were with me,” she said, addressing Tonya, “then things would be different. Or maybe you like things this way.”

Tonya shook her head and tried to speak around her pacifier, but the woman ignored her.

“Let’s get this over with, what does he want?”

“I am here to formally invite you to dinner.”

“Dinner?” The woman asked suspiciously. “Just dinner.”

“That’s all that I’ve been told.”

“That sounds like him, too.”

Apple sat there while the woman contemplated everything. She looked at Tonya and felt the telltale drop in her chest. It had been hours since she pumped last and the teary eyed girl on her floor looked perfect to relieve the pressure in her breasts.

“Do you mind if I feed her?” She asked Apple.

“I have no say in the matter, so that’s up to you.”

“Good, switch me seats.”

They changed locations and the woman undid the strap on the pacifier, pulling it from Tonya’s lips. She leaned back and undid her shirt, unclipping the cup off one of her breasts. Tonya paled as she caught on to what was going to happen. She looked at Apple with desperate pleading.

“Remember what Daddy said. Oh, and I’m sure she’s soaked nearly all the way through, but he said that she’s not allowed to be changed until he gets home.”

“Well, I can’t have that. If you would, go down the hall and in the cupboard on the left you will find a supply of diapers. Bring me one, I’d say size large.” “Yes, Ma’am.” Apple said, as she stood up.

“And Apple, you have known me long enough to call me by my name. Now, you, baby, get up on my lap.” Tonya whimpered again but did what she was told. She knew that refusing would be far worse than what she was about to endure.

“Yes, Donna.”

Donna arranged Tonya where she wanted her before leaning her back and pulling her head into her breast. Tonya wanted to fight back, and she squirmed as best as she could, but she didn’t fight too much and latched on to Donna’s nipple. The milk flowed immediately, and with the nipple as far into her mouth as she could get it, the spray missed most of her tongue and hit the upper ridge of her mouth. It wasn’t the first time that she had found herself suckling from the breast of another woman, but the level of trust between Donna and her wasn’t there to make it easier.

Trust was something that Donna was very aware of. “Good girl.” She said, looking into Tonya’s eyes. “And if you want to stay that way, stop struggling and whining. I don’t give second chances and I don’t accept apologies. And if I have to correct your behavior, then he will make sure you’ve learned your lesson. Am I understood?” Tonya nodded through her tears and kept eating.

Apple returned from down the hall with a clean, folded diaper in her hand. She undid and pulled Tonya’s pants down to her ankles. She unfolded the diaper and shimmied it under Tonya’s butt. She left again and returned with a butter knife which she used to tear lines into the middle of Tonya’s wet diaper. Satisfied, she pulled the fresh one up between Tonya’s legs and taped it closed. She tried to pull Tonya’s pants back up, but they wouldn't fit over the added bulk of the second diaper. She removed Tonya’s shoes and pulled her pants off the rest of the way.

She slipped Tonya’s feet back into her shoes and folded the unneeded pants.

“There,” she said, “now you won’t leak all over the place.” She sat back down while Donna checked the tapes and once content, patted the extra padding.

“That’s how a baby should look, with her diaper showing, that way, everyone knows that she’s a baby. I think you are done with that one, let’s sit you up for a burp, and then we will switch to the other side.” She sat Tonya up and patted her on the back until, surprisingly, Tonya burped. She slid off the couch, her legs spread wider because of the second diaper, and she waddled to the other side of Donna’s legs. She got back on the couch and leaned back into Donna’s waiting arm. She was getting sleepy because of the warm milk in her stomach, and she was too afraid of Donna to put up a fight. She latched on and let her mind wander as the real adults started talking again.

“Now, about this dinner. What are we having?”

“I am not sure, what would you like?”

“He didn’t tell you what to make?”

“No. I am assuming that if he had something in mind, he would have told me.”

“Then I can choose?”

“I think so.”

“Wonderful! Well, I do happen to know that you make a phenomenal tiramisu, and an alfredo that is to die for.”

“Would you like chicken with that?”

“Yes, I think that I would.”

“Would you like a chardonnay with that?”

“Hmm. I think a pinot grigio would sit better.”

“I think I can manage that. Would seven be a good time for you?”

“Seven would be perfect. I’m sure that I will be ready to give another feeding by then.

What do you think, little one?” She asked looking down at Tonya, “Will you be hungry by then?”

“I’m sure she will be.” Apple said. “And if she isn’t, the other one could use the test.”

“There is another one?”

“Yes, she’s three days away from completion and she’s been working hard to make sure that she gets there.”

“I see. I think that would make for a lovely little test. And I don’t want you telling your big sister what’s going to happen.”

Tonya shook her head, inwardly glad that someone else would be getting breastfed other than her. It would still be Daddy’s decision, but there was a chance. With several more pats to the back and another burp, Donna was satisfied that she had been thoroughly fed. She had survived yet another humiliation.

Getting back to the car proved just as embarrassing as the elevator had several people in it and there was no way to hide her appearance. She could hear the snickers and comments made, but could do nothing but try to cover her face with her mittened hands, sobbing quietly behind her pacifier and knowing that her first diaper was leaking into her second.

She would have given anything to disappear into the ether until Apple whispered in her ear.

“You’ve been such a good girl today that I will talk to Daddy about giving you a second chance. It takes a really brave person to accept that you are different from others and it’s not a bad thing. For what it’s worth, I’m very proud of you!”

Hope. Hope kept her going. She could trust Apple and for some reason, Apple knew just how to convince Daddy to ease up. It would still be up to him, but it was something to keep her going, and right now, with a tummy full of breastmilk and a soaking wet diaper, she needed anything she could get. Or a nap. A nap sounded good. And with the smooth ride and the comforting security of the car seat, a nap is what she got.

Part Three: The Agreement

The pleasing aroma of lightly grilled chicken permeated the air. Carmen knew in an instant that something special was going on that night. She had finished her shift at the pharmacy and patiently waited for Daddy to wrap up what he was working on to drive her home. There wasn’t a car seat in Daddy’s car, and she still had to sit in the back, but she didn’t mind.

She had made it through her work day without any accidents, using the potty only after seeking Daddy’s permission. Daddy had bought her a meal from the local diner, an adult meal, instead of the kids’ meals that she was normally allowed to have, for her lunch and she had sipped on the lemon water that he got with it. Daddy didn’t allow soft drinks in his house and to be honest, Carmen didn’t miss them much anymore.

She hadn’t thought at all about Tonya until she got into the living room to find the girl sitting on the floor, looking smug yet miserable. Apple wasn’t too far away, busying herself in the kitchen. Tonya had lost her pants and looked like she had either gained another diaper, or the one she was still wearing had swollen to the max.

Daddy didn’t acknowledge Tonya’s existence in the slightest. He closed the front door and paused for a moment waiting until Apple appeared to take his coat and briefcase. He went into the living room and sat in his reclining chair. Apple followed not far behind him, his slippers in her hand, and dutifully changed his shoes. She brought him the remote of the freshly dusted television stand and excused herself back to the kitchen.

Daddy turned on the television and put on the news. He scrolled through the personal emails on his phone, reading and deleting most of them. Some he sent quick replies to, but none that really caught his interest. He listened to the weather and stock information for a while before snapping his fingers and pointing at the space on the floor next to him. Carmen and Tonya both rushed to his side, kneeling down next to his chair.

“How are my girls today?” He asked, not really addressing them, but casually speaking in their direction.

“Good, Daddy.” Carmen said. Tonya mumbled something similar but couldn’t form words around her pacifier.

“That you have been, Carmen. Daddy is very proud of you. How about you go and ask Apple if she needs any help. If not, be a good girl and sit quietly at the table. Daddy needs to talk to Tonya.”

“Yes, Daddy.” She said, backing away from him on all fours before rising to her feet and heading into the kitchen. She knew what was coming. Tonya was long overdue for a spanking and a change, both of which only Daddy could administer.

“Did you have a good day with Apple, Tonya?” He asked.

Tonya nodded in reply. “And were you a good girl?” Tonya nodded again.

“I see that you have filled not one but two diapers. It appears as if you aren’t trying as hard to grow up as Carmen has. Do you want to be a baby forever?” Tonya vigorously shook her head.

“I hope not. I don’t like having to see you make so much progress and then regress back to this.”

She shook her head again, slower this time and with a sadness in her eyes.

“So what’s it going to take to get you back on track?”

She shrugged in response but the question was rhetorical. Daddy wasn’t looking for an answer, he was the answer.

“Well, as I’ve already stated, it’ll be a month this time for you, but this is the last time we are doing this. If you regress again, you are staying this way forever.”

Her face paled and she grew nauseous. Forever? Could he even do that? What are you thinking, of course he can. He can do anything, so of course he could make me a baby forever.

God, I don’t want to be in diapers forever!

“Let’s go to the bedroom and get you changed. We have company coming and I’d rather not have my dinner spoiled by the smell of a wet diaper.” He said, standing up. “Apple? Could you be a dear and meet me in the bedroom?”

“Yes, Sir!” Apple said from the kitchen, wiping her hands on her apron. She left Carmen to sit at the table by herself and followed Daddy to the bedroom. Tonya crawled on all fours behind Daddy, as she had done before during the last time she had regressed. She had been resistant the first time and had been severely punished for her insolence. It had been a painful lesson for her to learn and was not something she was keen to repeat.

Daddy pointed to the bed and Tonya crawled up and laid on the changing mat. Apple had set it out as soon as they had gotten home. She did a lot of things in preparation for Daddy getting home and it seemed like there was always something that he needed her to do.

Daddy pulled open the tapes on the first diaper, peeling it back enough to get to the inner layer. Those tapes didn’t pull open, instead, because of how long she had been wearing it, they pulled part of the plastic layer of the diaper. He loosened them up enough to pull the entire soaking wet mass of plastic and urine filled sodium polyacrylate out from under her. He handed it to Apple who balled it up and set it on the corner of the bed. He grabbed Tonya by the ankles and pulled her hips to the edge of the bed before twisting her legs, flipping her over.

He motioned to Apple, who got up on the bed and held Tonya’s hands by the wrists. Tonya was starting to cry as she knew what was coming. The sound was unmistakable. Leather tightly sliding through denim. She heard the buckle jangle before it was silenced by his clenched fist. She heard it swish through the air as he stretched his arm.

There was no way she could predict when the strike came. She looked into Apple’s eyes for some hint or sympathy but saw nothing but cold and emotionless amber eyes. Her eyes barely twitched when the first strike came. It was an echoing slap of folded leather across damp, sensitive skin. Tonya cried out in surprise and pain as her body lurched. Apple’s grip tightened to keep Tonya from pulling her hands back. Tonya’s eyes watered as she bit her lower lips to keep from crying out loud. The second strike was as hard as the first but lower, closer to her thighs. The third moved up and before he got to five, she was bawling, kicking her legs and flailing about, clenching her fists and digging her nails into her palms. She wanted to believe that by the end, she had gone numb, but that would be a lie. Daddy made sure that she felt each strike and when he was done, she was sure that he had left welts.

She sobbed into the changing pad as Daddy wiped her stinging, sore bottom with baby wipes. He spread her legs and her cheeks to get her private areas before he helped her turn back over on the bed. He wiped her front area clean and unfolded the clean diaper Apple handed him. He picked up Tonya’s bottom by her ankles, showing her just how strong he was, to slide the diaper under her. He sprinkled powder into the seat of it and on her privates, spreading it around with his hand. He pulled the plastic prison up between her legs before taping it around her waist.

“There. My baby is all clean and dry.”

“Thank you, Daddy.” Tonya said, between sobs and hiccups.

“You are welcome. Now be a good girl and take care of your dirty diaper. It’s just after five, so you won’t get a change until tomorrow morning. If you start to leak, I will double it up for you.”

“Yes, Daddy.”

“Dinner will be at six, so take care of your mess and start your chores.”

“Yes, Daddy.” She said as he walked out of the room. Her butt was on fire and sitting on it didn’t help.

Her chores consisted of her cleaning. The house was divided into sections by Daddy and each girl, Apple included, had their own responsibilities. Apple did the adult stuff, cooking, laundry, and anything Daddy needed done, while the other girls, up to four of them, had various daily chores around the house. Carmen had vacuuming, sweeping, and dusting in every room, Tonya had cleaning the bathroom, mopping, and emptying the wastebaskets. She didn’t feel like the tasks were balanced fairly, but she knew that complaining about it only got her more chores.

She gingerly walked around gathering the wastebaskets and dumping them in the big trash can in the kitchen. Daddy hadn’t given her any pants, and it wasn’t unusual for the house to have one or more adult girls walking around in diapers.

In the kitchen, she saw Apple wiping down the high chair. It would be the only way she would be eating, short of bottle fed, and it had been sitting in the corner of the kitchen for a while. Carmen and her had only been in diapers at night for being too loud out in public the day before. Daddy had sent them to bed early and without any options to use the potty, he had them diapered to protect the crib mattresses. Carmen had managed to hold it but Tonya had drank too much water and juice during the day and hadn’t been able to hold it for the ten hours they were locked in their cribs.

Tonya was so lost in thought, tenderly trying to find a way to walk that didn’t announce her presence with crinkling plastic and attempting to ignore the pain that she didn’t hear the doorbell ring for the first few times until Daddy’s hand pelted her bottom. The searing pain brought her back to earth and she heard the doorbell chime again. She hurriedly rushed to the door, forgetting what she was wearing, and pulled it open.

“C-Come in.” She said with a stammer, recognizing Donna’s voluptuous breasts.

“Why thank you.” Donna said, stepping past her and into the foyer. Carmen had appeared to take Donna’s evening coat and purse, laying them gently on the bed in Daddy’s room.

“And this,” Apple said, pushing the pacifier between Tonya’s lips, “is when babies are better seen than heard. Go wait in the living room until I come and get you.” She walked briskly away, back into the kitchen. Donna went into the kitchen, following the smells. Daddy left his chair in the living room and followed her. Tonya hated to be excluded from things, but knew better than to press the issue. She could hear them talking and laughing as she sat on the floor, mindlessly sucking on her binky. Apple would come get her when her dinner was done, which would most likely be something she ran through the food processor and turned to mush, but until then, she sat as quietly as possible to hear what the grown ups were saying.

“-and I’d have to admit that I was surprised to have Apple knocking on my door today.”

Daddy smiled, “It’s been too long since we got together and we needed the chance to catch up.”

Donna was expectedly suspicious. “Catch up? We haven’t talked in a month or so, it’s not like we’ve been estranged for years.”

“True, but there is much to talk about and I didn’t want to lose touch with you.”

“Much to talk about, huh? Shop talk then.”

“Yes, but not until after dinner, which is ready when?”

“Whenever you are, Sir.” Apple said, knowing that he was not only ready to eat, but ready to talk.

“Very well. I’ll leave you to handle things from here then.” Coded phrasing meaning

“Serve Us.”

Apple set the table, properly placing glass plates, silverware, and wine glasses for Daddy and his guest, while she placed plastic cups and plates for Carmen and her. It stood out as something peculiar to Donna but she didn’t say anything. It was his house and therefore, his rules. Apple didn’t seem to mind as she went around and served the requested amount of chicken alfredo to the adults, while giving Carmen a smaller serving. She poured Daddy his wine and with Donna’s coaching, wine for her. With them served, she stood off to the side, her plate empty, and waited for further instruction.

Daddy dug in with careful gusto, hungry but not impulsive, while Donna ate slowly, commenting Apple on her cooking skills. Carmen ate slowly while Daddy and Donna exchanged idle chit chat with Daddy controlling the ebb and flow of the conversation, keeping it around his work and only briefly touching on Donna’s new living arrangements. Throughout dinner, he would raise his glass for a refill or request something from Apple, who would quickly see to his needs.

After Carmen had finished and Apple took her plate, she sat there quietly, knowing better than to interrupt Daddy when he had company. She was thirsty but didn’t utter a word. Apple seemed to pick up on her discomfort as she poured Carmen a glass of mixed berry juice.

Carmen smiled at Apple and sipped her juice, surprisingly content.

With dinner done, Apple took their plates, refilled their glasses, and brought them bowls for their dessert. She set the pan of tiramisu, already cut, between them. She scooped out the section that Daddy gestured to and set it in his bowl. She did the same for Donna, moving around Daddy to wait patiently for Donna to pick her slice. As she waited, she felt Daddy’s hand slide up between her knees, his fingers pushing her thighs apart, so that he could press his on her sex before sliding them back and grabbing a handful of her ass cheek. Her expression was the same cold, unflinching face that she carried most of the day. She was used to it, even if she didn’t approve, and she had trained herself to not make a spectacle of herself.

Donna watched the whole thing with a blank expression, while inwardly screaming. She knew of his tendencies and hated them. His lack of respect for others personal space and privacy was a big deal to her but, like Apple, she knew when to pick her battles. If her suspicions were right, he was testing her. Which meant that he had something more to talk about than just idle shop talk.

Apple took it all in stride, such was her life. She busied herself with putting dinner away and pulling out jars of baby food for Tonya. Her night was far from over and judging by how frisky Daddy was, he would be expecting other things from her as well. She had the girls to take care of first and she tried not to think of what may or may not come.

With dessert done and Apple showered with compliments, Donna was ready to get the talk out of the way. He got up from the table, kissed Carmen on the head, and led Donna to the living room. He sat in his recliner, shooing Tonya into the kitchen, and motioned for Donna to sit in the love seat.

“And now, to business.” He said.

“Yes. Business. Straight and to the point, Mark, what does she want?”

He smiled, “You’re just as clever as always, aren’t you?”

“You don’t go out of your way to butter someone up unless you are looking to get something from them. So, what does she want?”

“She wants you to come back.”

“No.”

“Hear me out first. She-”

“Hear you out? Weren’t you part of the board that put me on administrative leave? And now she’s sending you like some lap dog to beg me to come back? I don’t think so. If she wants me back, she needs to ask.”

“So you can tell her no as well?”

“Absolutely. What she did was wrong on so many levels and you all know it.”

“It was. You are correct in that assessment. But it was the only decision we could make at the time. Penny needed to be made an example of and you were unfortunately caught in the crossfire.”

“Hollow sentiments three weeks overdue. And a poor apology.”

“It’s not an apology but a statement of the facts. It is also why we felt it was necessary to give you some time to compartmentalize before we approached you with a new task.”

“I wasn’t done with Kylie and who knows what kind of damage she’s had done to her by this whole debacle.” Donna said, her legs crossed and her knee bouncing.

“Which is why we want you back. Do you remember special project number five?”

“No. I stayed as far away from that Frankenstien division as I could. Special projects was always a horror show. And it never seemed to be fruitful.”

“There was potential there. Enough, perhaps, to spark your interest?”

“Stop being dodgy, Mark, and spit it out.”

“Project Womb.” Was all she said, and Donna’s twitching came to an abrupt stop.

“Project Womb? You didn’t! You unbelievable bastard!”

“I didn’t. She did. You know that we can’t have a failure. It would bring everything we’ve wanted to do into question.”

“There is a line that you do not cross!”

“Your anger is justified, but not required.”

“My anger is what it is. No one had the right to authorize such a treatment. You of all people know that there are some things that we don’t do.”

“I do. And it is irrelevant. The deed has been done and we need your help to pick up the pieces.”

“Pieces? Do you have any idea what kind of long term psychological damage you may have caused with this little stunt?”

“It is a concern. One of many. But tell me, what would you do? How far would you go to have Kylie back in your arms?”

Donna paused, her glare softened by her thoughts of Kylie. She had been such a happy baby, and happier still when she had someone to share her journey with.

“What about Lucy?”

“What about her?”

“Is she getting released too?”

“I can’t say.”

“But she can.” Donna said pointedly.

“Is that a compromise?”

“Are you trying to imply that my return is conditional to their mutual release into my care?”

“Yes. With conditions.”

“What conditions?”

“Ms. Hernandez can’t be released to you alongside Ms. Gillis. Lucy is being released to my care. If you want them to be together, then they would both have to be here.”

“And by proxy, I would have to be here.”

“Correct.”

“And what do you get out of this?”

“Besides working with a close friend and colleague?”

“Besides stroking your ego.”

“A mother for my girls.”

“You have Apple.”

“Apple is not a mother for my girls. Apple is Apple and her role here is to facilitate my needs, not to do my job.”

Donna was silent for a moment, contemplating. She looked around ponderously before speaking.

“I have terms.”

“I expected as much.”

“I will do this if only for Kylie and Lucy. These other two of yours are none of my concern.”

“Speaking of, Carmen, would you come here?”

Carmen appeared and knelt next to her Daddy. “You called for me, Daddy?”

“I did. I have a special treat for you, because you have been such a good girl lately. I have been very proud of you for doing exactly what I’ve asked and have one final test for you. It’s not enough to simply obey. A slave obeys, but a free person can make the decisions needed to exist as their own person.

“With that said, Donna would you mind?”

Donna smirked, knowing what he was referring to, and she promptly pulled her breast out from her shirt. It was full and ready to be drained.

“Donna hasn’t had someone to feed from her in quite some time. Would you mind helping her out?”

Carmen looked at Daddy and at Donna’s buxom chest. He was testing her and she knew it but she didn’t know how or why. What was his test? For her to refuse and be an adult? Or for her to obey in order to help a friend? She was confused and scared. She didn’t want to do the wrong thing and end up back where she started, three months further away from her freedom. Conversely, she didn’t want to give in and show that she wasn’t ready to be a big girl and still needed to be a baby. Terrified, she closed her mind off to everything and let her gut answer for her.

“Daddy? Can you put me in a diaper?”

“Why would you ask that of me? You haven’t broken any rules, or have you?”

“No, Daddy, I have been a good girl, but you have taught me that if I’m going to be a baby, I need to be dressed like a baby. And babies wear diapers.”

“That is correct and you have done well. Go tell Apple that you need to be changed. I have made the arrangements and tomorrow, you are going home. Congratulations, you have passed!”

Carmen, who had made it most of the way to the kitchen, stopped in her tracks and spun around, her eyes wide with disbelief.

“You mean it? I’m going home?!”

“Yes, you are. You have discovered your pain and healed your wounds. I think you are fully capable of living your life on your own now.”

With a swell of pride and excitement, she rushed across the room, flinging herself into Daddy’s lap and squeezing him tight as she said “Thank You” as many times as she could blurt out in one breath.

“I’ll be checking in on you from time to time, though, just to make sure that you are living your best life.”

“Okay, Daddy, I promise to be a big girl and keep my panties clean and dry.”

“I’m sure you will. So how about you go pack your things and enjoy the rest of your night here. No more rules for you, sweetheart. You don’t need them anymore.”

“But what about her?” Carmen asked, looking over her shoulder at Donna.

“I wouldn’t worry about her. I still have a baby around.” He lifted Carmen off his lap, setting her on the floor. “That’s no longer your concern.” He said, patting her on the bottom and waving her away. She disappeared around the corner and they could hear her footsteps thud with enthusiasm as she raced towards the play room to collect her toys.

“I guess that I don’t need to leave this out.” Donna said, pulling her shirt back over her exposed breast.

“There is still a baby that needs to be fed.” Mark said, standing up. He went into the kitchen and with a few snaps of his finger, led Tonya and Apple into the living room. Almost immediately, Tonya found herself being pulled back into Donna’s arms and a nipple pushed into her lips. She didn’t understand how Carmen had gotten out of this, but with Daddy nearby, she didn’t dare think too hard about it. She simply latched on and drank as she was expected to, which, much to her chagrin, tasted better than the baby food that Apple was spoon feeding her.

“We haven’t settled matters.”

“No, we haven’t. What are your terms?”

“The girls are my concern, not yours. I don’t want your particular brand of retraining around Kylie and Lucy. They have been through enough and when it is time, we will decide when and how they move to the next step. I don’t want any of this months long punishment to recur over and over again because of your thirst for power.”

“That is oddly specific.”

“No, what is specific is that I know how you like to get hands on and I will not tolerate that if I’m to stay in this house. These girls are still adults and nothing gives you consent to touch them in that way.”

“What makes you think I-”

“Please. Don’t attempt to bullshit me. You and I know very well what happened to Sarah and I will not let that happen to Lucy or Kylie.”

Mark paused, his anger flaring. He glanced over at Apple who seemed oblivious to the conversation.

“Anything else?” He asked through clenched teeth.

“This one goes. To whom, I don’t care, but she goes. My guess is that she’s passed your tests enough times already but you keep tripping her up. Send her on her way and do what you normally do, demand proof that she’s being behaved.”

“I’m not one to take orders from the likes of you.”

“No, but I’m guessing that your ass is on the line if we can rehabilitate these girls and that someone else has figured out your dirty little secrets.” “I will not be blackmailed!” He said, standing up.

“Oh sit down. Your posturing doesn’t impress me. Those are my terms. You and I will play Mommy and Daddy, but I take care of the girls. When they are ready to work, they can work for you but under my rules. You can act all big and tough, but in the end, I will wear the pants in this house. Those are my main conditions. Take them or I walk and you can find someone else to clean up your mess.”

Mark sat back down indignantly. He hated being told what to do, especially by a woman but he was stuck in between a rock and a hard place. If he didn’t accept her terms, he would most likely lose everything he had built and the secrets surrounding Sarah would come out. It was a risk that he couldn’t afford to take.

“Tch. Fine. We will do it your way. The girls will be here next week.”

“Then it’s settled. I will bring some of my stuff over this weekend to get settled in.” She sat Tonya up and turned her around, showing Mark and Apple her wet diaper. “Someone has earned a change and to go home, wouldn’t you agree?”

Donna left not that long after. They had talked about a few more things, the pendulum swinging farther away from Mark the longer she was there. The girls had never seen him backpedal that much and it was scarily impressive. Carmen and Tonya were happy that they were going home, one an adult, the other in pull ups. It was worth it for the both of them. Their rehabilitation was over and whomever Kylie and Lucy were, Carmen and Tonya felt sympathy for them. They had been in the program for little over two years, and the longest, hardest part was just beginning for them. To go from dependency to self-sufficiency was a grueling task, and it had almost broken them.

Two girls were starting their new lives, two more were about to be reborn.

Part Five: Rebirth

Pain and fear. Excruciating, piercing pain. Terrifying, heart stopping fear. Everywhere. It all hurt. Eyes screwed shut but blinded. Ears covered but deafened. Skin hurt, burning from the freezing cold. Muscles didn’t work, legs felt like jelly. She couldn’t walk. She could barely grasp her own body. Everything was so bright, so loud, and her skin felt like it was on fire. Hands were all over her and their grip felt like they were going to rip her limbs off. The mask was pulled off her face and ice cold air hit her lungs, making her cough. She was shaking from the cold, feeling like she had that one winter when she had fallen through some thin ice. Unshakable cold, like she had been stricken with hypothermia-esque symptoms.

Warmth. Heated liquid flooded over her, like where she had been, and her shaking subsided. She tried to find her bearings, to get a grasp on where she was and what had happened to her, but she couldn’t. Her memories leading up to now were clouded, like she had just woken up from a long, deep sleep. Soft things brushed her skin. All of it. There were so many soft things and they were everywhere, wiping, patting, and rubbing. No part of her was left untouched and no matter how she tried to protest, her wordless cries fell on deaf ears.

She was laid on her back, strong hands moving her around effortlessly and something was placed under her. She heard familiar noises and felt familiar sensations. Soft sand falling on her skin and a noise she couldn’t place came before an alarming pull of something from between her legs, held down and then pressed into a stationary position. More soft things brushed her skin. She was lifted up and something was placed under her. Her arms were folded across her bare chest and the soft thing was wrapped around her, covering her arms and tightly wrapping around her legs. Something else was pulled onto her head, something warm, it blocked her eyes almost completely. The lights went down and she was left in near darkness. A different, softer light and extra warmth turned on and she was silhouetted in blue. She was cozy, like back in the womb, protected, safe, and content. Unable to move much, she lay there, trying to figure out what had happened to her.

Her attempts at speech were fruitless. Noises that didn’t resemble words escaped her lips. Infantile coos and inane babble were all that she could muster. What she did remember of herself, she played over and over again in her head. She knew her name, her mom’s name, and where she used to live. She knew other things, but they all seemed irrelevant. There was a huge gap in her memory. Something major happened, about a month ago and she couldn’t remember anything more recent than that.

Her body, like her mind, was weak. She couldn’t break free of her bonds. She could feel everything but wasn’t strong enough to do even the simplest of tasks. Her fingers were clumsy, unable to grasp anything. Her legs felt unnaturally unsteady, as if she had never used them before. Even breathing was labored as she had to expand her chest to pull in air. Every task she set upon was exhausting and she wanted nothing more than for it to be over. She was too tired to think about trying anymore, and she let her mind rest, falling asleep.

More noise. Earsplitting noise that woke her from her slumber. Something was screeching. Something? Someone? Who? She turned her head towards the sound, but couldn’t locate its source. She heard hustling and bustling nearby, coming from the same area that the screeching was. The screeching turned to cries, like that of a baby, and there was something familiar about them. She had heard those cries before.

Memories flashed before her eyes of a girl, running scared down the street, naked except for something strange around her waist. She recalled feelings for that girl, something akin to a sibling. The girl’s face flashed in front of her eyes and a name. Lucy. Lucy? Lucy!!!

She mumbled something. Trying to get her lips to form the syllables of her friend’s name. What she managed was some unintelligible gibberish, a series of muffled consonants. She tried again, putting all of her breath behind it and managed to get out something that could barely be construed as English.

“L-lu!

The cries turned to frantic whimpers as Lucy recognized Kylie’s vocal patterns. “Ky! Ky!” She sputtered, having the same problem forming words as Kylie.

“Lu!”

“Shhh!” A stern voice said, pushing something bulbous into Kylie’s mouth. “There is no need for that.”

Kylie tried pushing it out of her mouth with her tongue but it was held firm. In her attempts to push it out, she pinched it with her teeth and a liquid dripped into her mouth. It tasted strange, not disgustingly strange, but just strange. When it hit the back of her tongue, her stomach growled and she happily sucked on the strange thing in her mouth.

“Yes. That’s better. Eat your fill. You’ve been through quite an ordeal.” The voice was gentle and seemed to imply care but was just as foreign as every other noise. It wasn’t the voice she knew in her head and that made her mistrust it.

The person with the voice didn’t say anything else but Kylie could tell that they were still there by the slow tilt of whatever they had put in her mouth. She continued to drink the strange liquid until she pulled in air and coughed. The object was removed and she could hear the click of heels retreat out of her vicinity. The room fell quiet save for Lucy’s vain rustlings and before she knew it, Kylie was falling asleep again.

She awoke to icy air biting at her skin. Whatever had been wrapped around her was gone and someone was pulling at the thing that encompassed her waist. She searched her memory to try to put a concept to the thing and as she remembered Lucy running towards her, she searched that memory for the missing detail. She focused on whatever had been hanging off Lucy’s hips and as her mind attached a name to the object, a flood of emotions and memories washed over her.

Diapers! She was in- I was in...diapers! And now? I’m still in diapers! Why? What happened to me? Oh God, it was full. Yucky! Wait. Yucky? It doesn’t feel yucky. Who says yucky anyway? Babies say-

More memories, triggered by the term baby, flooded through her consciousness. The bedwetting. The hiding of her soiled linens and underwear. Some familiar lady finding out. The pull ups. The denial. The eventual return to diapers. The Institute. The program. Going to live with her Mommy. Her mommy.

Lucy? Mommy? Lucy. Mommy. Mommy!

“Mmma.” She tried to say. “Mmma. Mmma!”

“No, sweetie. I’m not your Mommy. You will be seeing her soon. And your Daddy. Stop squirming now and let me change you.”

Daddy? I know that I have a Mommy but when did I get a Daddy? Who is he? What’s he like? Why do I need a Daddy?

More heavy thoughts. They were hard to process and left her tired. She just wanted to sleep. Her belly was warm with whatever she had drank and as she was wrapped back up, dry and clean, her eyes started to droop from being too comfortable. So much had happened at once and it was overwhelming. She listened to the gentle snoring of Lucy near her and let her rhythmic breathing coax her back to sleep.

Moira Vale stood in the observation lounge, looking at two of her test subjects. There were more, but these were the first two to come out of the pods and she had a vested interest in their recovery. Dr. Shanda Hammond stood near her, slightly behind, denoting Moira’s place at the head of this department.

“I am led to believe by this chart that everything is proceeding as foreseen?”

“The patients are recovering as expected. We anticipate them being able to talk in a few days and walk inside of the next month.”

“That won’t be necessary.”

“Pardon?”

“I want them kept as helpless as possible, for as long as possible.”

“Isn’t that counterintuitive?”

“No. This keeps them in the infantile state for as long as possible, short of permanently.”

“May I ask why?”

“With these troubled individuals, I don’t want to risk them going through the program too fast and not getting the help that they need.”

“Typical corporate response.” A gruff, manly voice said. The doctor turned around to see Mark standing in the back of the room. “You just need to admit the truth.”

“There is no truth other than what I’ve already said.”

“Oh really? You wouldn’t happen to be worried, then, about the girls getting stuck between where they were and where they are now in their development? Or, and potentially more damaging, they could rush through the program and announce to the world what kind of treatment that you put them through?”

“How is their memory retention, doctor?” Moira asked, ignoring Mark’s jabs.

“Uncertain. From what we’ve seen, there are some gaps in the memory, but we can validate that hypothesis as they can’t properly communicate.”

“A double edged sword then? We can’t let them speak as they might remember too much, and we can’t trust that their memories have been suppressed enough to block out what you did to them?” Mark quipped.

“That would be an astute description.” The doctor replied.

“It is irrelevant. What’s done is done.” Moira interrupted. “My orders still stand. They need to stay as helpless as this for as long as possible.”

“She won’t like that and I doubt she will follow it.”

“I don’t care what she likes.”

“You should. With what she knows and how invested she is in these girls, she’s already made it apparent that she’s taking complete control of their recovery.”

“That’s what you are for. Make this happen, as discreetly as possible.”

“I’ll do what I can, but I also need to voice my disapproval of this trajectory.”

“Noted.”

“And you are taking a huge risk that I don’t think we need to take.”

“I don’t remember asking for your permission.”

“Moira. Listen to me, and really listen. You can’t keep a dictatorial iron fist over this division anymore. Too many mistakes have been made. It’s best to get these girls their Acceptance and get them back to their families. This has already been a massive headache and we don’t need to complicate matters anymore trying to cater to your fears.”

“Fears? What fears do you presume to think that I have? I am deeply invested in the balanced, life changing recovery that these girls need. You are correct that mistakes have been made, but we would be making an even bigger mistake if we didn’t take the time to correct our indiscretions. We have a perfect opportunity here, let’s not squander it with meaningly delusions of grandeur.”

“What is your expert opinion on this matter, doctor?”

Sharon looked rattled at the implications of Moira’s plan but needed to tread carefully in how she voiced her view of it.

“Well, looking at these test results, I am concerned that reintroducing them to their fully functional lives could have disastrous physical and psychological effects. We haven’t had a successful reintegration with this technology so we must proceed with caution.”

“Straight from the professional. Do what you are told Mark.” Moira adamantly said.

“However, prolonged use of these types of drugs could render them catatonic or with long term vocal or physical paralysis.” Sharon continued. “It is therefore my recommendation that we proceed with a slow wean off of the drugs, with careful monitoring, and with the intention of having them medication free and regaining their faculties within the next two months.  The doses we gave them were pretty high, and they would be at high risk of muscle contusions should we push their recovery too fast.”

“Two months?”

“We are in uncharted territory, so it is best to err on the side of caution.”

Mark processed his thoughts. Two months didn’t seem like too long of a time. He could keep the lie going that long and it would keep both parties happy.

“What should I be looking for as they come off of this cocktail?”

“Weakness in motor functions, exhaustion, long term fatigue, things like that. They will have to learn how to walk again, though I doubt they will need therapy, but mainly to trigger their muscle memory. Akin to coming out of a coma.”

“And you’ve dealt with people like that before, so you shouldn’t need much in the way of help.” Moira said. “So surely you can manage two months of care for these girls before she cuts your balls off, right?”

Mark ignored the comments and looked through the window at the girls sleeping in their bassinets. They were swaddled in light blankets and blue ultraviolet lights were shining on their bodies. They were yellow tinged in the face, clearly suffering from jaundice due to a vitamin D deficiency. If it weren’t for the fact that they were fully grown adults, they could easily pass for newborns. Their heads had been shaved nearly bare before they went into the pods so the short, fuzzy stubble that adorned their heads made the look even more convincing.

Moira cut his thoughts short. “Do you have everything ready? Within a few more days, we want them moved out of here. The less they remember about this place, the better.”

“Yes. I have resupplied and Donna has moved enough of her stuff in for her to be comfortable.”

“And Apple?”

“She will be fine. I’m sure she’ll appreciate having another woman in the house.”

“Good. We need this to go as smoothly as possible.”

“It will. Though I have reservations about the girl I released early. I don’t think she was ready.”

“She will be watched carefully. She hasn’t said anything to anyone yet, not even her parents and as far as we can tell, she’s following your final instruction. She is no longer your concern, however. I don’t want you to lose focus.

“I won’t.”

“And report to me about Donna’s behavior. I am worried about her attachment to these girls.”

“I will.”

“And for God’s sake, don’t fuck this up!”

“Oh sure, lecture me when I’m here to fix your mess! Good day, Moira. Try not to slip any further into the pool of shit that you’re in. It’s already up to your neck.”

Mark left the room, and the door swung loudly shut behind him. The sound dampening braces needed to be replaced, though it didn’t matter as the sound echoed in the small room. Sharon stood motionless and watched Moira breathe in and out slowly, calming herself. She had been getting rattled by her employees at an increasing rate and there was concern that she was losing control of her empire.

Lori Gillis knocked tentatively on the apartment door. It had taken her a while to search out where Donna Duncan was staying. Her gated community guard had made it clear that she had not been to her home in well over a month and the only files she could find on the Institute servers had her last known address here. She didn’t know what sort of vehicle Donna would be driving, but when she had scanned the parking lot, she saw no sign of the sports car that she had seen Donna in.

Clutching the hastily written address in her hand, she knocked on the door again, listening for any signs of life. She thought she heard footsteps but was still startled when the door swung open. Behind her, Donna had boxes packed and stacked neatly around her apartment.

“Going somewhere?” Lori asked, using the obvious as an icebreaker.

“This place was never meant to be permanent.” Donna said, standing aside and inviting Lori in. “Was there something that I could help you with?”

“I wanted to talk to you about Kylie.”

“Kylie? What about her?”

“How is she?”

“I’m not sure I can answer that. There are things that I’m not supposed to discuss.”

“Is she here?”

“No.”

“Then what can’t you discuss? I’m not interrupting her care, am I?”

“No.”

“Then I don’t see the problem. All I want to know is how she is doing.”

“I’m not sure I can answer that either. She...hasn’t been in my care for a little bit.”

“Why?”

Donna sighed. “There are things that I can say, and there are things that I can’t say.”

“Can you cut to the chase? I haven’t heard anything about my daughter and I’m tired of getting the runaround.”

Donna sighed again. There were many reasons as to why they didn’t talk to the parents or loved ones about a patient. Beyond confidentiality, there were too many company secrets that shouldn’t be spoken about.

“Would you like a coffee?” She asked.

“Sure.”

Donna led her into the small dining area where the coffee pot quietly percolated. She pulled two cups out of a nearby box and unwrapped them. She gently put the packing paper on the counter and rinsed the cups out.

“Sugar and cream?”

“Just sugar, please.”

“My kind of lady. No fancy flavors.”

“Coffee is a drink of the mind, not a fashion statement.”

Donna laughed lightly and poured coffee into the two cups. She handed some sugar packets to Lori as she set the cups down on the table. She sat across from Lori and sipped on the hot beverage. Lori tore open two packets and dumped the sweetener into the dark liquid.

She swirled the mixture gently before taking a sip.

“God, I love French Roast coffee.”

“A woman after my own heart. I suppose I owe you some answers, so ask away.”

“What did you do to my daughter?”

“I helped her. As best as I could for as long as I could.”

“Then where is she?”

“I do not know. Honestly. But I do know that I am supposed to be getting her back.”

“When?”

“The end of this week. Which is why I am packing.”

“So, what happened?”

“Well,” she said, “she was a casualty of circumstance.”

“What circumstance?”

“She was socializing with another girl in the program and that girl’s caretaker was not following the proper procedures. Your daughter had built a friendship with the girl in the program and came to her defence when it mattered most. I am very proud of her.”

“Then what?”

“I can’t speak of anything past that. Those decisions were made without my input but I can say that she was responding well to the program and was well on her way to recovery.”

“Was she out of diapers?”

“No. Though she was close. She had reached the point where she was accepting the way things were. She’s a good kid and was very well behaved.”

“Do you think that you helped her?”

“I do. I feel that I gave her part of what she needed in her life.”

“And what was that?”

“To be frank, a mother.”

“She has a mother. I’m her mother.”

“You are. But there is a difference to giving birth to someone and being a mother to them. I’m not here to debate your role in her life, I am merely stating that she seemed to gravitate to my maternal methods.”

Lori sighed, remembering what Moira had said. “I see.”

“Don’t discredit yourself. You raised an amazing daughter, and there was no way of knowing that she would need something beyond your parenting.”

“It’s not that. I know I did a good job in raising her. I just never expected her to end up like this.”

“Like what?”

“Needing your brand of care. I know what we do and I know why it needs to be done, but at the same time, I didn’t think that she would need it like the others I’ve seen.”

“My brand of care? She wants to be mothered, cared for, and acknowledged for being a human being with foibles.”

“I know she’s a human being.”

“We just need to know that some care, some therapies, are more on the fringes of acceptability than others, but that doesn’t make them less viable as therapies.”

“I...I’m not upset with the methods...just...that it had to happen to Kylie. No. That’s not right. I’m upset because I couldn’t accept that this is what she needed.”

“Acceptance is hard for everyone. We are so used to believing that our way is the only way or the best way. We tell ourselves that we have a good grasp on our little corner of the world. It’s difficult for us to understand that we may not have the best view of the way things should be.

“That is not a condemnation of our ability to make knowledgeable decisions, but merely a reminder that we are not all knowing. You were far closer to the answers you were searching for than you know, but you are but one person and one person can’t be expected to shoulder all of the burdens of a household.”

“It sounds like you are saying that she needed a father.”

“Not necessarily. What I’m saying is that you are one person and you can’t control it all. Even if you could, it sounds like you weren’t able to live for yourself much less help your daughter. I did say that in the past tense, because when I met you, you were far more tense and, dare I say it, obsessive over controlling the situation. That doesn’t appear to be the case now, as you appear to be in control of your life, but relaxed about it.”

“I will say that I’ve had a chance to get a new outlook on things. I’ve had time to think about what my old lifestyle really meant, and how claustrophobic it really was. I went through the motions and tried to hide Kylie’s issues from my social group. But it felt like that’s all I was doing was hiding from other people’s opinions and it didn’t feel right.”

“Social shame is a recurring problem in my line of work. Everyone is afraid to be judged by their peers.”

“Ostracized more than judged. I can handle opinions, but not people I thought I knew turning away from me because of something that I couldn’t control.”

“Which is what led you to the Institute?”

“No. I didn’t know anything about this company before I fell head first into it. All I knew was that I wanted a certain type of lifestyle that I thought I was due. I believed that all my hard work as a single mother with two adult children was enough to earn a place among them. But what I found was a network of lies and liars, bent on preserving their good names by putting their children through reeducation courses.

“At first I was mortified, but the more I looked at it, and saw the company as a whole and what it was trying to do, the more I realized that I was trying to hide something that I thought was exceedingly rare, but found it far more common than I knew.

“That realization put a lot of things in perspective and I was finally able to accept that my daughter needed help as well as understand that things I may have thought were vile or disgusting could also be beneficial.”

“It sounds like you have found a path towards acceptance.”

“Acceptance isn’t the problem. I would be fine if she wanted to be in diapers for the rest of her life. What I need is her forgiveness. I wasn’t there for her to be the mother that she needed me to be and I need that chance to tell her that I’m sorry.”

“I’m sure that she doesn’t blame you for what happened.”

“Maybe not for this past year, but for other things.”

“You will have your chance. She’s come a long way and she still has some to go, but I can personally guarantee you that you will have your chance to tell her how you feel.”

“I hope so. I have so many things that I need to answer for.”

“I would recommend that you seek forgiveness, not penance. You may need to explain what you’ve done, but you certainly don’t need to be punished for it.”

“I have many things to explain and I’m glad I got this time to talk to you. You really are a good psychologist.”

“To be a good doctor, you need to heal the body and the mind. Ignoring one forsakes the other.”

“Can I ask you to do something for me. For when you do see her?”

“Sure.”

“Can you tell her that I love her and that I’m proud of her.”

“Absolutely. I would be delighted to.”

They finished their coffee in silence, a mother making peace with a surrogate mother. They both cared for Kylie and wanted the best for her. Lori felt as if she had gotten a huge weight off her shoulders. Taking in Isaac and helping him realize his needs and dreams had put a lot of perspective on her relationship with Kylie. In the end, her happiness was all that Lori really cared about and she couldn’t find a reason to judge her for how she found that happiness. Content with where she left things, Lori headed home to begin planning for Kylie’s return. She had been given a second chance to save her relationship with her daughter and she wasn’t going to waste it this time. She didn’t know exactly how, but she would find a way to make her house a loving home.

Part Six: Cracks

The trucks idled mindlessly in the underground parking structure. They had been supplied, manned, and were waiting on their cargo. Much like ambulances, the small, single drive axle trucks were meant for the transport of people, in this case, two girls. They were being wheeled down the hall towards the elevator that would take them down to the parking structure.

They were still in their cribs, and they would be until they reached their destination.

Sedated, they slept, swaddled like infants, and had just received a fresh change. Dr. Moira Vale walked slowly in front of them, her heels clicking on the floor. Behind her, the cribs were gliding along the floor with barely a sound. Dr. Shanda Hammond followed Moira, walking just ahead of the cribs. She carried a case marked with medical warnings and glanced over her shoulder at the orderlies that pushed the cribs along. Each orderly took an elevator with Moira and Shanda splitting up.

They rode down to the parking structure in silence and when the doors slid open, they emerged near the two transport trucks. A black luxury sedan pulled up behind the trucks and Moira headed for it, the driver pulling open a door for her. She glanced at the cribs as the liftgates of the trucks lowered to the ground. The cribs were pushed onto the liftgates and were raised into the back of the trucks. In the truck beds, the cribs were aligned onto pads that lowered into the bed, neatly locking the legs into place for safety.

Shanda made sure the girls were still asleep before getting into the other side of the black sedan. It pulled out in front of the trucks and led them out of the parking structure. In moments, they were out on the main road, heading out of town.

“Are you sure that this is such a good idea?” She asked Moira.

“It’s what needs to be done. The sooner we get them into a routine that they are familiar with, the less likely they will be to remember what happened to them.”

“I know, and I agree. But we don’t know what kind of damage was done with such a prolonged stasis.”

“There is only one way to find out. If this program is to improve, we need to try things outside of the box.”

“Improve?”

Moira paused, “Picture, if you will, a much shorter program, where we can regress clients to infancy within a month, guaranteed, without the heavy handed processes we have now. The faster we get them to Rehabilitation, the faster we can get them to Acceptance, and therefore, the more clients we can potentially take on. What this means for us, besides more income, is a much faster turnaround and less hiccups. The hardest part of this job is dealing with people that don’t want to change.”

“So we force them to change? That doesn’t seem very ethical.”

“You’re thinking too emotionally about it. We aren’t forcing anything but pushing the mind to reassess what led them here in the first place.”

“That doesn’t give them a way out of the program though.”

“No one has successfully left the program without finishing it and our successes speak for themselves. What they have is the illusion of choice and after a month or so in this new program, they will see that there isn’t a choice. The only way forward is by working with us, unless they really want to go out into the world functionally incontinent.”

“This all sounds so cruel.”

“Yet you have personally heard testimony from our successes. Everyone who has made it through, which is all but these two, have sworn up and down that we have saved their lives and given them a fresh start. I might also add that our recidivism rate has stayed locked at zero. Not a single client has gone back to their old ways or old lives. We aren’t just helping people, we are saving them from themselves.”

“I hope that is the case. I’d hate to see all that we have accomplished be used for nefarious purposes.”

“Nefarious purposes? You make us sound like supervillains.”

“I’m just saying that I won’t allow this technology to be used maliciously. It is mine after

all.”

“While you created the technology, it was my resources that made it happen.”

“Your money is not my patent. Remember that I hold all usage rights to its production and implementation. Let’s not have a measuring contest but instead agree that this is a trial run and we both need to agree to its validity before we move forward.”

Moira scoffed. She hated when people thought they had the upper hand. While it was true that Shanda had the rights to the womb technology, it was a contract and dollar figure amount away from being hers. She had to bite her tongue and grit her teeth when it came to Shanda, and for now, she would, but before the ink was dry, she would have Shanda thrown out on her pretentious ass.

They rode the rest of the way in silence, the driver keeping just enough of a lead on the two trucks to keep them in a small convoy. They rode for about twenty minutes before they slowed and turned into a subdivision. They crept down the paved paths before pulling up to an inconspicuous house with a fenced in yard. The fencing was wooden on the sides and rear, but brick in front. The metal gate that protected the drive was made of slats, painted brown, that were set in an interlocking fashion that prevented anyone from seeing in. The gate slid open and the trucks backed slowly up the drive. Moira and Shanda hurried into the lawn as the gate slowly slid shut. The drivers prepared the liftgates and the orderlies were busily unsecuring the cribs. To the left of the sidewalk was a concrete path wider than a sidewalk that led to a half basement. The fencing on either side of the yard loomed at eight feet, more than sufficient to block any view from any potentially nosey neighbors.

The orderlies went into the basement first and pulled out two of the empty cribs, rolling them to the side of each truck. The girls were rolled onto the liftgates and lowered to the ground. Moira and Shanda looked the girls over, making sure that they were still asleep, before nodding to the orderlies who pushed them down the path and into the basement.

Mark and Donna stood in the basement with Apple standing not far behind them. They watched the cribs being wheeled into place and Donna did her best to curb her excitement. She had been waiting for this day since she agreed to do this. Moira and Shanda followed the cribs into the basement and stopped just inside the French style doors. The orderlies rolled the cribs into place and the wheels clicked into the restraining locks.

“Donna, it’s good to see you back in the fold.”

“This is a dangerous game that you are playing and there better not be any long term damage.”

“Focus on your work and their recovery instead of your thinly veiled threats. What’s done is done. It can’t be undone so it’s your job to make sure that they reach their full recovery.”

“It shouldn’t have been done in the first place and now if you will excuse me, I have clients to help.”

“You will need this.” Shanda said, holding out the case.

“What’s that?” Donna asked.

“Just something to make their transition easier.” Mark interjected, crossing the room and taking the case from Shanda.

“Do you have enough supplies, Mark?”

“We have it covered from here. We will let you know how they progress.” His tone clearly indicated that he wasn’t in the mood to talk.

Moira scowled and snapped her fingers, turning on her heel and storming out of the basement. Shanda and the orderlies followed her and it wasn’t long before they heard the trucks pulling out of the drive and onto the road. Mark, with case in hand, closed the doors leading outside and headed for the stairs. Apple followed him, as silent as ever, leaving Donna to check on the girls.

She went to Kylie first, lowering the bars of the crib and rubbing her hand across the young girl’s cheek. She fought back the urge to shake Kylie awake and gently rubbed her shaved head. Her new hair growth was soft and fuzzy. She didn’t look the same as Donna remembered her but gentle snoring was all too familiar. She didn’t need to be changed yet but Donna wanted to be prepared. She checked on Lucy, who was in the same state, before turning on the baby monitor. Nearly everything she needed to take care of them was down in the basement, save for her personal effects. There wasn’t a bedroom for her to stay in, so she would have to leave them in the basement. She raised the rails on both Kylie and Lucy’s cribs, making sure that they were locked, before heading upstairs herself.

She found the receiver for the monitor and hung it from her hip. She hoped that the girls would be awake sooner rather than later so she could evaluate what condition they were in. There was a laundry list of concerns that she had and at the front of the list was whatever was in that case that Mark had.

She found him, per his usual spot, sitting in his chair, scrolling through his phone. She sat in the chair opposite him and bounced her leg over her knee. He glanced up from his phone but not at her face. He looked at her bouncing knee and knew that he would have to deal with the elephant in the room.

“Aggravated?”

“What made you guess?”

“Your knee is bouncing again.”

“I don’t like things kept from me.”

“And what things are you referring to?”

“What’s in the case Mark?”

“Medication.”

“Is this the cooperation I’m expecting while I’m here? One word responses?”

“Perhaps. All of that depends on your tone with me.”

“Tone? Oh, I see. You seem to think that while I’m a guest in your house, I have to kneel to your demands. And if that is the case, you are sorely mistaken.”

Mark put the phone down and locked eyes with Donna. The tension between them was palatable.

“A stare down? I can do that.” Donna said defiantly, uncrossing her legs and leaning forward. She wielded a glare that had made many a young girl back down. Mark’s stern look was only effective because it carried with it the threat of punishment which did nothing to Donna.

Mark sighed, his intimidation efforts wasted. “The case contains the medication they used to keep the girls sedated.”

“Couldn’t you have just said sedation?”

“It’s more than that. It’s a combination of a muscle relaxer, light paralytic, and a low grade anesthetic.”

“Why do we need it now? I can handle the girls.”

“It’s a precaution. As this process is untested, we don’t know the long term side effects. This will allow us to wean them off the chemicals at a controlled pace.”

“Then why hide this from me?”

“Because you’re too close to them. Too emotional to see the bigger picture. We have to proceed with caution.”

“You seem to believe that I can’t be approached with logic. Your need to lie and keep secrets from me because of your pointless need for control. What you don’t seem to realize is that your pathetic attempts only reinforce the idea that you have no control. You’re a classic megalomaniac with superiority delusions and while that may work on your girls, it doesn’t work on me. I want the truth from you. No more lies and no more secrets. This life you’ve built on top of your deceptions will ultimately end in the untimely reveal of your misdeeds. Unless you wish me to expedite this process, I suggest you be as forthcoming with me as possible. And remember, the sooner these girls have been rehabilitated, the sooner I am out of your hair and you can go back to being king of your castle.”

“I don’t need your psychiatric evaluations. And spare me your sermons. You are still a guest in my house and of tentative employment to the Institute so I wouldn't act so pretentious if I were you.”

“You seem to believe that you still hold some sort of power over me. You don’t. This whole thing,” Donna said, waving her arm around, “will only remain yours as long as you are the good little lap dog that does as he’s told. You don’t own any of this and you certainly don’t own me but if you want to play that game, I’m in. I know full well that you are on your last chance with the company. Your skeletons are piling up and the cracks are starting to show.” Their eyes both darted to the kitchen where Apple was making lunch.

“The last thing you need,” she continued, “is to try to wage a war with me through subterfuge. It didn’t work before, it won’t work now.”

Mark leaned back in his chair, contemplating. “You know I only do what I feel is in the best interest.”

“Of whom? You? Her? Your perception of what’s right has been skewed for many years, Mark and it’s not going to right itself until you acknowledge what you’ve done. But that’s your burden to bear, not mine. I told you a week ago that I am assuming total control over the care of these girls and I meant it. Nothing, and I repeat, nothing will enter or touch their bodies without my approval.”

“A point you have made abundantly clear.”

“Then I will take the case and all of its contents.”

“As you wish. It’s sitting on your nightstand.” Donna looked at him with bewildered amazement. “I may have my reasons for what I do, but I am not the monster you perceive me to be.”

“I never claimed that you were a monster. Misguided, perhaps, but not a monster.”

From the kitchen, Apple called out to them, “Sir? Ma’am? Lunch is served.”

They stood up to go eat, Donna checking to see if the monitor on her hip was still on. They had only taken a couple of steps before Mark grabbed Donna’s arm, stopping her. Donna shot an angry glare at him but softened when she saw the worry on his face.

“Is it that obvious?” He asked, being as vague as possible.

“No. But you are slipping. Part of me thinks that you want the lie to be over. You owe it to yourselves to come clean and let the chips fall where they may. I won’t say anything more but I suggest that you don’t dawdle too much longer.”

“You handle yours and I’ll handle mine.”

“That was always the plan.”

They left things at that and ate lunch in silence. Mark seemed troubled but played it off whenever he caught Apple looking at him. Donna excused herself from the table early, taking her sandwich on a plate down to the basement. She wanted to check on the girls and make sure that they were okay. The house didn’t feel like home, and she wondered if she would always be on edge there. The girls would be a welcome enough distraction, but at the moment, as she leaned against one of the empty cribs, she couldn’t think about anything except how uneasy she felt and how she knew she would always feel.

Dreams. Sporadic nightscapes of blurred imagery dancing in front of her eyes. She was young, she was older, she was happy, and she was sad. They weren’t coherent and she struggled to pin one of them down so that she could enjoy it. They flashed much like memories, quick glimpses into what was, what could be, and what had been.

There was tightness all around her, and she couldn’t move. She couldn’t tell if her dreams had her frozen in place or if it was something else. She could move her shoulders and wiggle her hips, but that was about it. She couldn’t tell if the noises that she heard from moving were from her dreams or not, so she disregarded them. She felt warm and comfortable. There was something maternal hovering on the fringes of her subconscious, something familiar. She couldn’t pinpoint what it was and why she felt a longing for it, but it was there and she felt safe because of it.

A different dreamer, one that was more scared than anything, slept restlessly. Her dreams were dark, with two ominous shadows that chased her endlessly. She was exhausted from running and there was nowhere else for her to go. She couldn’t hide from them anymore but she ran anyway. Her lungs burned, her breath was weak, and her legs were jelly, but she pressed on. She knew if she stopped then she would be no more. They would find her, catch her, and imprison her. Where, why, and how were impossible to answer, but their indistinguishable voices lent her no comfort. She had to keep running away from them, away from their truths, and away from her fears.

She moaned in her sleep, frantic sounds of panic and fear, but they went unanswered. Ears that would have heard were busy, and her voice was too quiet. She suffered alone, in near silence, unable to produce a sound that would bring aid, no word or cry. The demons that chased her were relentless, and she had to keep running.

In The Quiet Place, a place where she existed in solitude, a girl remembered. She remembered life before today, not the recent, but the long ago. She remembered when she used to run, to smile and play, giggle and enjoy herself, and genuinely be happy. She remembered when it had all started to change. When the age of innocence was slowly washed away with the survivor’s guilt of adulthood. She remembered being on the cusp of it all, the first time the sadness had crept in. She was a young girl, twelve or so, and one of her childhood friends had just asked her to join a tea party with her stuffed animals, Barry the Bear and Dorothy the Doll. She had refused, even after her friend had begged her, on account of not being a baby anymore. That phrase, not being a baby anymore, had opened the door for the sadness to come in. In her rush to be big and face maturity, she had turned her back on the joyful exuberance of youth, where imagination was all you needed to have the best fun in the world.

It was the first time she had felt the sadness, but it wouldn’t be the last. The more time passed, the more she felt compelled to stray away from not being a baby anymore. The older kids, her brothers and sister, were off doing things that looked really fun. Going to see movies she wasn’t allowed to see, having special drinks she wasn’t allowed to taste, wearing makeup as mom did, and the list went on. All of those things were so grand and exciting that she couldn’t wait to try them herself. She didn’t notice, however, the sadness that her brothers and sister had. While they did all the fun stuff that was so new and marvelous, they also had a lot of times where there was no fun. The books she had in school were a third of the size of the books the older kids had. Mom and Dad were more strict and stern with them, asking all sorts of questions about who they were with, what they were doing, and when they were going to be home. Her sister’s clothing changed, going from playful to more muted colors, with crazy images on them, and then changed again, and again, and one more time before she had a screaming match with mom and dad before shoving her things in her car and going away.

When it was time, and she had grown enough, it was her turn to try all the things that her brothers and sisters had done. They were gone then. Her brothers had gone off to a new school and she had last seen her sister over a video chat. There was such sadness in her eyes that day and all the things that were so interesting and exciting didn’t bring her any joy. Nothing seemed too anymore. School was a slog, long and boring days full of peer pressures, overbearing expectations, and general malcontent. The only excitement she found was from breaking the rules, usurping the powers that be, and finding her own way to rebel against her own unhappiness. Gone were the days where she could be carefree and unaffected by the problems of the world. Now, she dulled her misery with sneaking out, drinking, and trying her fair share of drugs.

That lifestyle ultimately led her to The Quiet Place. Among other reasons and actions that she didn’t want to think about, she remembered that day her friend had asked her to stay young and she wished with all of her heart that she had a second chance to say yes. She was willing to give anything for the opportunity to block out the sadness that now overwhelmed her heart.

A shifting body and creak of wood above her reminded her of who and what she was. She looked out past her hands and through the wooden bars. Her gaze was level with the floor and she had no idea what was happening beyond that. Curled up into a ball on her side, she pulled the pillow she had earned under her head and tried not to think anymore. Seeing the reality was only a painful reminder of the sadness and being a blank slate each and every day was preferable to more recent memories.

So she forced herself to sleep, dreaming a dream of nothingness. White spaces full of detailess voids. Here she was safe. Safe from her past, her present, and whatever awaited her in the future. Here was the only place she had any control and until she could gain control of something in her waking life, this would have to do.

Part Seven: The New Routine

After the jarring realization of what Kylie and Lucy went through, it didn’t take them long to settle into the routine. While everything was harder because of the drugs they had been on and the long term stasis that they had been subjected to. Akin to coming out of a coma, they were weak and helpless. While they could move their arms and legs a little bit, they could support themselves on their own legs, and were relegated to doing nothing more than rolling over. They couldn’t crawl or walk and with the cocktail of paralysing drugs in their systems, they wouldn’t be able to without significant help. They had been terrified when they first woke up, having gone from the lab to recovery to a basement. Helpless, and unable to articulate words, the only thing they could do was cry and scream.

Donna was quick to come to their calls and they were quick to settle. Kylie was the first to recognise Donna’s face and was overly excited to be back in her care. Lucy wasn’t far behind, either, full of similar exuberant cheer at being with Donna, and perhaps more importantly, with Kylie. They looked similar to newborns, as their hair hadn’t grown back in yet, and when dressed, they looked just like adult sized infants.

True to her word, Donna was the dictator of their care. When she did have help, usually in the form of Apple, she made every decision necessary for their care. Apple had to take on the chores that were left when Carmen and Tonya left, which left her with little time to be of much use, however, she was quick to set her chores aside at any request. Donna prepared all of the meals which consisted of bottles and pureed foods, and did all of their laundry. Apple’s tasks with Lucy and Kylie were limited to helping Donna bathe them, usually with a sponge, as they were too cumbersome to carry to the tub.

The drugs were given in their food, each portion measured out prior to the girls’ arrival. Donna had resisted the urge to cut them off from the medication outright but was unwilling to risk any potential side effects should any arise. She had just gotten them back and didn’t want to lose them to her own selfish arrogance. She did note how interested Apple was in the medication. The younger girl had asked several times what was in it and what it did. For Donna, it was more than a curiosity, but she thought little of it. Whatever Apple was thinking about was beyond Donna’s interests.

The first weeks passed by relatively quickly. The girls slowly regained their strength and mobility and by the end of the first month, they could sit up, grasp things, and clumsily crawl. Speech and walking were still behind, though, and the most the girls could manage was standing with assistance and a few words and phrases.

They spent most of their time downstairs as Donna wasn’t ready for them to be around Mark. When Apple was done with her chores, she liked to be around Kylie and Lucy, keeping an eye on them and sometimes playing with them. Apple’s helpfulness was less and less required as time went on and Donna wondered what the poor girl did when she didn’t have anyone to take care of. She was so great with the girls and Donna wondered if she would prefer to be one of them. What she knew of Apple’s story was mostly hearsay. Hushed stories told around the office of a girl that went too far down the rabbit hole. She didn’t know if there was any truth to what she had heard, but she did know that Apple was ruled over with an iron fist, which led her to believe that there was something to the whispers.

Kylie and Lucy slept a lot. One of the noticeable downsides to the medication was lethargy and dry mouth, so they drank a lot and slept, always waking up soaking wet. This further instilled the routine of frequent changes from Donna but took a taxing toll on their diaper supply. Near the end of the first month, the girls were crawling haphazardly and more akin to toddlers. It was at this time that Kylie shined. She was back in her true state and was recovering much faster than Lucy. She was the first to crawl, the first to stand, and the first to use coherent baby talk like firsty and hungy. She recognized Donna as Momma and Lucy as Lulu. She even had a name for Apple calling her Sissa. She hadn’t been really acquainted with Mark and Donna was doing her best to keep his influence out of Kylie’s affairs, but the more mobile she became, the more time that Kylie spent upstairs and their paths were bound to cross eventually.

Kylie was in Donna’s room, laying on a changing pad, getting her fourth or fifth change of the day. Donna was starting to lose count of how many diapers the girls were going through. She was minding her own business, calmly playing with a teething ring and listening to Donna tell her how proud she was of Kylie’s progress.

“You’ve done so well, Kylie! I am so proud of you! Now if I could just get Lucy up to your pace, we will be all set to move on.”

“She doesn’t want to move on.” Kylie said with clear intent and perfect prose.

Donna stopped in the middle of taping the diaper closed and looked directly into Kylie’s eyes. Kylie was absentmindedly chewing on the flavored teething ring, having a certain proclivity for grape flavoring.

“Did you just complete a whole sentence, Kylie?”

Kylie paused, looking up at Donna and pulling the ring from her lips. “I’ve been able to talk normally for weeks now. I can walk too.”

Donna was stunned but not surprised. She had stopped giving them the paralytic medication a week ago and was starting to grow concerned that she hadn’t seen any progress on the speech or mobility fronts.

“Then why haven’t you told me?”

“You never asked and I didn’t want to. I like being like this. This stage is perfect for me.

Yes. I can be an adult but why when I have you to take care of me.”

“Don’t you want to go home?” She asked, taping the diaper firmly in place.

Kylie sat up, opening and closing her legs to get the diaper comfortable between them.

“As long as I am with you, I am home.”

Donna blushed, her heart racing with pure joy. “That’s very sweet of you to say, Kylie, but your mother...your birth mother is very worried about you.”

“I’m fine, as you can clearly see.” Kylie said, standing up. She took a few steps around the bed with a measured grace of someone who had not spent a month medically paralysed.

“Clearly. And is Lucy…”

“Lucy is just like me. She can walk. She can talk. The whole nine yards.”

“Then I’m afraid I don’t understand what’s going on. The goal is to get you two home. You’ve been fully regressed back to infancy and now it’s time to adulthood and your lives.”

“What if we don’t want to? Let’s be frank, Donna, my life sucks. I’m a spineless, cowardly, insecure brat with mommy issues. I have no friends, no real family that doesn’t look down on me, and no one to act like they give a shit. There’s no reason for me to go back to that life.”

“Watch your mouth.” Donna said. “You may be more advanced than I thought you were but you don’t have my permission to cuss.”

“Sorry, Donna.”

“That’s better, but I am still not convinced of what you want.”

“What I want is to be happy and right now, I’m happy.”

“Being a baby?”

“Being your baby.”

“I see. And Lucy?”

“You should ask her yourself. I can’t speak on her behalf.”

“Fine. Then I think we should go talk to her.”

“Okay.” Kylie said, falling to her knees and starting to crawl. Donna looked at her in bewilderment as Kylie’s pink diaper swayed back and forth. She crawled from Donna’s bedroom to the stairs leading to the basement where she sat on her butt and slid with a thump down each step. Lucy was in her crib, staring off into nothingness.

“Lulu! Momma here! Lulu!” Kylie exclaimed, crawling from the steps to Lucy’s crib with earnestness. “Lulu! You wakey?!”

Lucy rolled to her side and smiled a big grin at Kylie. “I wake. I wake.”

“Momma talk now. Momma talk.” Kylie said, trying to climb into the crib with Lucy. Even though she could stand and walk, Donna had to help her get into the crib, one leg at a time.

Donna was amazed at how quickly Kylie could go from adult to toddler like flipping a switch.

“All settled in now, Kylie?”

“Uh huh.”

“Good. How about you, Lucy? Do you need to be changed?”

“I dunno.” Lucy said, sheepishly. Everyone could tell that her diaper was wet, soaked even, and yet she still tried to play it off. Donna squeezed the drenched mass between Lucy’s legs and gently spoke. “My my, I think you are wet. Very wet in fact. Let me go get a fresh diaper and some wipes and we will get you all fixed up.” “Otay, Momma.”

Donna left them to giggle in the crib while she crossed the room to the supply closet. She was down to her last half a dozen diapers and she knew that they would go through them much before the delivery would arrive. She would have to go out to get more, at least to tide them over, which meant that she had to take the girls with her. She could leave them alone, or, under Apple’s care, but they were her responsibility and she felt that they had been cooped up quite long enough. She grabbed a diaper and the refillable box of wipes and returned to the crib. Lucy had Kylie’s teething ring in her mouth and Kylie had Lucy’s thumb in hers. It was comical and heartwarming to see such innocence.

Donna pulled Lucy’s legs sideways so that her legs would hang outside the crib and pulled open the tapes on her diaper. With efficient proficiency, she had Lucy wiped down, powdered, and was pulling the fresh diaper up between Lucy’s legs when she started talking.

“Would you girls like to go buh bye with me? We have to go get more diapers because someone, and I don’t know who, has been a little pee pants lately.”

Both girls nodded excitedly, the prospect of going outside was exhilarating.

“Now that means we have to get you dressed but we also have a problem. We don’t have a stroller yet and I can’t carry you.”

“I can walk Momma!” Kylie said, pulling Lucy’s thumb out of her mouth.

“I know you can, Kylie, you’re such a big girl. Almost big enough for training pants.”

“Nuh uh! Diapies!” She replied. “I no want twainy pants.”

“Okay. You can still wear your diapers. What about you, Lucy? Would you like to try training pants?” Lucy shook her head and looked away, trying to shake the focus off of her.

“Are you sure?” Donna asked. “You know you can be honest with me.”

Lucy refused to answer anc kept looking away. Kylie sensed her embarrassment and pulled the teething ring out of Lucy’s hand.

“It’s okay, Lucy. Donna knows. I told her. You don’t have to play shy or hide it.” Kylie said. All shreds of baby talk had disappeared from her voice. She sounded like her adult self and she climbed out of the crib to stand next to Donna. Lucy looked at Kylie with fear in her eyes and then at Donna.

“The last step for us is Acceptance. I accept that this is who I am and what I like. I’m an adult baby girl who prefers to be a toddler. I have nothing to be ashamed of and no reason to hide it anymore.” Kylie said with swelling pride in her voice. “I still have a ways to go as I need to resolve the issues I have that brought me to this point, but I have decided that this part of me, this Little Side, will always be there and that there is nothing wrong with that.”

“I am very proud of you for reaching this stage, Kylie. You have done a fantastic job accepting that this was always a part of you, before you ever came here, and will remain a part of you for the rest of your life. The last few steps are Healing and Peace, and you are well on your way into them.”

They looked at Lucy who slowly sat up. Her eyes darted to her dangling toes as she mustered up the courage to speak.

“I...I’m not ready…”

Kylie was the first to say something, having more compassion for Lucy’s struggles with her inner demons than most would think. “That’s okay. It’s perfectly fine. No one is asking you if you are ready. And you don’t need to feel pressured to be ready any time soon. I just wanted Donna to know that we aren’t as helpless as she thought we were. I’m sorry if that was too soon for you.”

“You aren’t helpless, Lucy.” Donna said, kneeling down in front of her. “And Kylie is right, you don’t have to feel pressured to do anything. If you want to stay a baby, that’s perfectly fine with me. I’ll be here for as long as you need me to be and no matter what, I will never stop caring for you.

“I know this got far too serious, far too quickly, but I just wanted to know if you were okay with walking when we went out shopping. You don’t have to do any more adult stuff than that, I promise.”

“Pwomise?”

“Cross my heart and hope to die.”

Kylie chimed in, “Stick a needle in my eye.”

Donna held out her pinky finger to the girls. “Our pinky swear is our bond.”

Kylie wrapped her pinky around Donna’s and they looked at Lucy. “And even in the great beyond.”

Lucy hesitantly reached her pinky out to join the others and Donna smiled, holding her girls’ pinkies tight. “You will always be my baby!” She said with a smile.

“Y-you mean it?”

Kylie smiled. “What did we say in the Truth Zone, Lulu?”

Together they repeated their vow. “Cross my heart, hope to die, I pinky swear that I will never lie!”

Donna crossed her heart and held up her hand to take the solemn oath. “Cross my heart, hope to die, I pinky swear that I will never lie!”

On the last syllable, Lucy erupted from the bed, flinging her arms around Donna and holding her tight. Kylie stepped around behind her to get a hug in too and Donna did her best to wrap her arms around both of them. She had never had a reaction like this, or the overwhelming feelings that came with it. Lucy and Kylie were like her daughters and they had just vowed to stay that way forever. Donna knew the harsh reality, but in the moment, she was overjoyed.

“Now, now, before you go making me all emotional, we do need to get you two dressed.

We can’t just have you running around in your diapers and nothing else.”

“Yes, Mommy!” Kylie and Lucy said in unison. Being bare chested was something that had taken some getting used to, but now, and even when Mark was around, they weren’t fazed by their own nudity anymore. Couple being topless with being changed on a frequent basis and there really wasn’t any shame left to have. Hard to be embarrassed when someone is cleaning up after each messy diaper.

Donna pulled them out each a onesie that said Best Little Sister Ever! on it and help them pull them down over their heads. They stood with their legs apart while Donna did up the snaps. She then let them pick out their pants. Kylie went with a skirt that came down to just above her knees, got it on, before pulling it off with reckless abandon.

When prompted on why she didn’t want to wear it, she showed her legs to Donna. She hadn’t been allowed to shave any part of her body for a while and it was evident. Pouting, she picked a pair of loose fitting pants, tugging them on without thinking about it. Lucy laughed and pointed when Kylie stood up. The pants had ruffles sewn into the seat, just like baby pants. Kylie tried to pull them off but Donna stopped her, saying that she looked utterly adorable. Not to be outdone, Lucy picked a pair of legging type pants with a tutu skirt sewn in around the waist. Fully dressed, they both looked exceptionally babyish. Donna topped off their ensembles by clipping pacifiers to their shirts and tying summer hats onto their heads. She told them that she didn’t want them getting sunburns on their heads because of their lack of hair.

She packed the rest of the diapers into a diaper bag, added some toys, and some burp rags before leading them up the stairs. Apple was in the kitchen, wiping down the appliances. She cocked an eyebrow to the girls being on their feet instead of on all fours but she didn’t say anything. Donna opened the fridge and pulled out two large, full bottles of milk. She looked at the girls for a moment, seemingly lost in thought before she put the bottles back in the fridge. She didn’t say why, but motioned to the girls to follow her and she led them out the front door and to the van. She opened the side door and motioned the girls inside. They each got into their car seats and giddily waited for Donna to buckle them in. They held hands as Donna got into the driver’s seat and were giggling and laughing back and forth as she pulled out of the driveway.

Donna checked on them frequently through the rear view mirror. She drove to the little shop she knew, an adult kink store, where she could find the adult baby supplies that she needed. While she was expecting a delivery from the Institute, she had her own preferences on what her girls wore. The Institute was cheap, offering in large bulk those plain white, boring M4 diapers. While their efficiency was astounding, they didn’t have any flash or flair that kept the girls entertained. Pretty colors, childish prints, and the like made changes fun for the girls as each change could bring on something new and exciting instead of the same old, same old. Engaging the girls in their routine and care by making even the most mundane things fun and exciting made everything they had to go through easier.

They also needed to get out of the house. Two months of living in captivity was too much for them and she was worried that they would suffer long term damage by not being able to socialize. It also provided the perfect means in which to test Kylie’s proclamation. If she had truly accepted her little side, then being exposed as a baby in public wouldn’t faze her. Plus, if Donna had their routines down, they were both due for a feeding and a messy change while they were out.

She contemplated what Kylie had said about Lucy and how Lucy behaved during her change. She wondered about what Kylie said in regards to Lucy not wanting to move on. She would have to talk to her in a one on one scenario about it and look back at her notes. She was worried that Lucy had suffered some form of long term damage while in the pods. It had happened before and with the potency of the medication they were subjected to, it could happen again. She also pondered what Kylie had said about her own life and how there wasn’t anything there for her to go back to.

Kylie was adamant in staying right where she felt the best and Donna couldn’t blame her but there wasn’t any way that Moira or Lori were going to let her stay with Donna forever. Kylie, while having made great strides towards acceptance, had not yet crossed the hurdle that was holding her back. It wasn’t her mother that had spawned her behavior, it was her absentee father. While it all sounded cliche, a girl with daddy issues, it was the truth. Her father abandoning her had left some really deep wounds and the only way to get her to face them and begin to heal was for her to have far more interactions with Mark. She needed to face a father figure to trigger whatever was the cause of her internal regression.

Donna still had to discuss the matter with Mark, one to bring him up to speed and two to work out a treatment plan for their interactions so that he knew where he stood and Kylie got the care she needed. She was wary of telling him anything personal about Kylie, beyond what was in her file, but for the sake of her charge, she would have to do so. Kylie wasn’t going to be able to move on and heal without it and she was going to lose interest and happiness with her little side if she couldn’t process why she was in the state she was in.

Lucy, however, was an entirely different matter. While her situation bore some resemblance to Kylie’s, Donna surmised that Lucy’s mother was the denigrating factor in Lucy’s damaged psyche. While her father was a patriarch in every normal sense, it seemed like he was the disciplinarian in extreme cases only, while her mother handled the smaller, day-to -day offences. Donna had reread Lucy’s evaluation the night before and the story between the lines told a much darker story. Her mother came off during the interviews as meek and submissive to her husband, but when asked in a one on one session, she was much more vocal. After watching the tapes, Donna surmised that behind closed doors, Lucy’s mother was a calculating, manipulative woman with a cold, almost aloof behavior towards her daughter. Her actions portrayed her as insensitive and demeaning, treating her daughter like a puta instead of a daughter.

With the family’s cultural background, Lucy’s perceived actions were a great embarrassment to the family name and caused her father much shame. Instead of seeking the root of the problem or addressing the hearsay and rumors, Lucy’s mother ostracized her maternal commitment to Lucy and barely recognized her as a daughter. Lucy’s behavior made more sense with those realizations. She hadn’t openly talked about it yet, and that would be a hard conversation to have, but the signs were there. Lucy reverted back to infantile behavior and was clutching onto staying a baby for as long as she could to feel like some maternal figure actually cared for her. Donna suspected that there were one or more abusive incidents that were the crux of Lucy’s diagnosis. She didn’t know yet if it was a male abuser or female abuser but Lucy had suffered some form of trauma, most likely sexual, when she was a prepubescent girl.

She looked back on the girls via the rear view mirror and saw that they were asleep. They hadn’t been riding long and still had a ways to go, but it was refreshing to see. For the majority of the time they were really well behaved and when they were deep in their regressive states, they were absolutely adorable.

She thought about what was happening in society. Kylie and Lucy weren’t the first girls she’d dealt with and she was sure that they wouldn’t be the last, but she saw a clear trend of traumatized people coming through the Institute. While that number seemed really high, she also knew that it was just a percentage of the damaged population. She thought about the breakdown of the family unit and the lack of consistency in child raising. So many issues could be avoided if it were a simpler time. Broken homes lead to broken children who become shattered adults and most of them don’t even realize how traumatized they are until something causes those wounds to manifest.

“Regression has its potential but it’s a treatment for a much larger underlying condition. Society is sick and we have to treat the whole group and not just the individual. I don’t know how and I couldn’t begin to think of a place to start, but this cycle will never end unless something is done. But then again, if I could fix society then I would be out of a job.” She glanced back at the girls and her gaze lingered on Lucy. “Would that really be such a bad thing? She seems so attached to me. I know Kylie wants to stay a little long term but I don’t think it’s with me. Lucy on the other hand…. No. I can’t think that way. Just do the job and get them better. You know what happens when you get too attached. You see it every day.”

Unbeknownst to her, Kylie lay awake in her car seat, listening to the sounds of the road and Donna talk to herself. She was awake because, like Donna, she had a lot on her mind. She could feel the tension at home and she had picked up on how protective Donna was of her and Lucy. There was something off in that house and she didn’t fully understand what. She had seen a few things that struck her as odd and she had been watching Apple’s behavior whenever the guy was home. The whole house had a tonal shift when he walked in the door and it was disturbing.

Beyond that, there was that one time that she was crawling around the house and she saw into his bedroom. His bed looked weird, extra high off the ground and although she only saw it for a moment, she clearly remembered his bed sitting up on top of what looked like a cage that was the exact dimensions of the bed. She hadn’t been in the house long and she didn’t know the reason for any of it, but she worried for Apple. Apple treated her and Lucy with care and respect and there was a feeling of camaraderie there. If there was anything she wanted to accomplish before she left that house, it was helping Apple and Lucy find their lasting peace.

Part Eight: Exposure

Leah Hammond had just finished buying several sets of appealing underwear from a small specialty shop in the mall when her stomach grumbled. She was replacing her wardrobe for no other reason than to be seen as sexier. One of her latest one night stands at college had left her questioning her clothing choices. He had been just another guy, one she had seen at several of the parties that had popped up after finals that semester. He had been nice enough to not come onto her the first few times she had talked to him and as the party had wound down and the hook up selection was getting sparse, she had decided to give him a chance. The sex was fine, passable enough, and he was rather forgettable except for what he had said about her lingerie when she was getting undressed for him.

That was her thing. For each guy she hooked up with, she would do a strip tease for them to show off her body, entice them to perform their best, and to get herself in the right mindset. Drunk guys would say anything to get into a girl’s pants and she knew it, but to keep up the reputation of being a good lay, as it were, she set herself apart from the other girls by dancing for them. Often, a girl’s reputation would be ruined in the party social circles if he couldn’t perform. A disingenuous cruelty, they would blame the girl they hooked up with for not being good enough and that stigma was enough to be shunned from the party circles.

It was neither here nor there, as she didn’t hook up with anyone she didn’t think was sober enough to last. What stuck in her craw, as her grandmother used to say, was her bland underwear. She had danced for him as she stripped down to her bra and panties. Guys liked being the one to take the last bits off.

“Huh. I thought you would have had something more exciting.” He had said.

“More exciting? The fact that I’m getting naked for you isn’t exciting enough?”

“Oh, it is. For sure. But listen, just between you and me, guys don’t want to see cotton panties and lame bras. It’s boring. A girl can have the most rocking body in the world, but if she doesn’t think she’s sexy, it’s a turn off.”

“My underwear is a turn off?”

“Your underwear reflects how you feel about yourself. If you don’t think that you are sexy, how willing are you to wear clothes that are sexy?”

“I know I’m sexy. You came on to me, remember?”

“I did. And yet, you are the one that has to dance each time to get the mood set. But more importantly, your clothes reflect your attitude. Bland, boring clothes equals a sad and lonely girl.”

“You know you are killing the mood, right?”

“Hey, I’m still down if you are, I just thought I could use this moment to give you some friendly advice.”

“Sure, it feels all sorts of friendly. And I suppose you want me to go down on you too?”

“Only if you want, but you are more than welcome to come sit on my face.”

His tongue skills turned out to be rather amazing, which was good because the sex was terrible. It was one of the few times where she hadn’t worn a pull up. She had left after he had passed out, his words ringing in her head. They had followed her home and although they had faded in the weeks since she had left college, she had been folding her family's laundry when she found that she couldn’t distinguish her panties from her mother’s. Disgusted that he was right, she went shopping, trying to find something more her age and lifestyle.

The girls had been well behaved in the adult store. No one seemed to bat much of an eye at how they were dressed and when they got to the baby section, they were amazed at the selections available to them. Donna let them each pick out a package of diapers they wanted to wear, new pacifiers, and a set of bibs. Even though they were bottle fed a majority of the time, they needed solids to keep up their dietary needs. Donna grabbed a few other packs of diapers just to have a supply on hand and some wipes with aloe for their skin.

She changed them one at a time in the back of the van before getting them into their car seats. For all intents and purposes, she had done what she set out to do and had not elicited any real reaction to them being out in public. She knew that she would have to push them farther if she wanted to see them truly challenged. The best place for that would always be the local mall, a popular place for all the people their age and a place where it would be easy for them to be noticed. While the styles and trends of the younger kids were surely unusual, she highly doubted that any of them would be showing the clear signs of being in diapers.

The girls giggled and laughed in the back seat as she drove, oblivious to where they were headed. That was the great thing about being in little space, they weren’t bothered by much and they didn’t pay attention to much. The most that bothered them was being changed or fed. Donna knew that she couldn’t get away with giving them bottles at the mall. The girls would not accept them. She could force the issue and probably be successful, but she weighed her options on whether it was worth the fight or not.

They noticed where they were when she pulled into the crowded parking lot. She was watching them through the rear view mirror as they realized where they were. They stiffened and paled almost immediately, looking at each other and out the windows in a near panicked state. Donna brought the car to a stop a bit away from the entrance where there were far less cars. She waited for a moment, idly playing with her phone while keeping her focus on the girls.

She could hear them whispering back and forth in worried tones.

“Can you believe where we are?”

“It’s gonna be hard to hide our diapers!”

“Our diapers? Isn’t that the least of our worries? I’m wearing a tutu sewn to my clothes.

It’s bound to get noticed.”

“I have ruffles on my butt!”

“I’m scared, Kylie, I don’t wanna go in there.” Lucy’s tone changed to sound more insecure.

“Me neifer.” Kylie said, falling back into baby talk. “We should tell Momma we want to go home.”

“I can’t. You tell.”

Just as Kylie turned to talk to Donna, Donna put her phone back into her purse and opened the car door. She stepped out into the sunshine and quickly opened the sliding side door. The girls wanted to protest but Donna produced their pacifiers and pushed them into the girls’ mouths.

“We are not going back home. Mommy wants to do some shopping and she can’t leave you in the car unsupervised. You are coming with me, end of discussion, and you will do so calmly or there will be a spanking in your future when we get home, am I understood?”

“Can I just get the spanking? I don’t want to go in there Mommy!” Kylie asked, pulling the pacifier from her lips.

“There isn’t a discussion to be had here, Kylie. You are going and that’s final.”

“But I don’t wanna!”

“One.” Donna said sternly.

“That’s not fair!”

“Two.” Donna said, stern but calm.

“Mommy!!” Kylie said, nearly in tears.

“And that’s three. I don’t deal with fussy babies, and you know better.” She said, digging into her purse. She pulled out a different pacifier, one with a large, bulbous nipple and straps attached to it.

“No! I’ll be good! I’ll be a good girl! I pwomise!”

Donna paused and looked Kylie in the eyes. “I also don’t give second chances. You know the rules.”

Kylie nodded, fully understanding. She would be punished later, that was evident, and she was on very thin ice with Donna. If she pushed the matter any farther, she would find herself bound, gagged, and given a very public spanking. There would be another one, a worse one, when she got home. While that all seemed rather mundane given what she had been through, the worst aspect of it was knowing that she had let her Mommy down.

When Kylie had calmed down, Donna unbuckled them and helped them out of the car. She handed Kylie the diaper bag. It wasn't a bag so much as it was a backpack. It was white with a pink floral pattern on it. Easily disguised as an accessory that any girl could own, it didn’t stand out. She slung it over her shoulders and loosened the straps so that it hung down as low as it could, mostly covering the ruffles on the seat of her pants. Donna noticed her efforts, however, and tightened the straps back up.

“A baby isn’t modest. Do you want to prove that you have accepted this? Now is your chance.”

Kylie whined but didn’t say anything. She walked next to Donna, nervously looking around to see who was looking at them. They made it most of the way into the mall before she noticed anyone giving them strange looks. Most of them just did a double take at the way the girls were dressed but didn’t say anything. Those that did, said nothing about the secret that girls hid because they couldn’t tell. She thought about how blind people were. While their attire was eyebrow raising, no one really noticed what else they were wearing. She traced her fingers around the edges of the rear of her diaper and even with the ruffles, she knew that there was an outline of it hugging her rear. Yet everyone that passed her by, from the front or the back, didn’t notice anything. Or, if they did, they kept it to themselves. Lucy was likewise noticing that nothing was happening from the passersby and they began to relax.

They followed Mommy from store to store, becoming more and more confident that they were being ignored. They began to lighten up and be more playful as their ever present little spaces took them over. Before long, they were laughing and giggling again, acting like the children they wanted to be. Donna was keeping a close eye on them and when they started going quiet is when she began to smile. They had been in the mall for about an hour and they were starting to feel the pangs of hunger. Hunger, and something more sinister was brewing in their bellies.

Her shopping done, she slowly led the girls towards the food court. They had quieted down substantially and seemed to be more on edge. Nature was calling them and they were both facing the realization that they were going to have to fill their diapers in a very public place. Donna was cruelly clever.

In the food court, they stood quietly behind Donna as she ordered from a popular burger joint. She ordered a chicken sandwich and two kids meals. The young guy behind the counter looked at Kylie and Lucy with a peculiar gaze but said nothing. The girls were fidgeting where they stood, their urges getting stronger. They waited impatiently while the order was being filled, the pressure building.

With their food and drink on a plastic tray, Donna led them to a distant table, far away from as many diners as possible. While clever, she wasn’t sadistic. The girls had enough to go through that they didn’t need public humiliation added to it.

On the way there they passed by a table with a sole occupant, surrounded by bags. The person seemed to look intently at them as if they were long lost friends. The trio continued on their way and the stranger’s eyes followed them, looking intently at the two younger girls as they walked. They watched as the trio sat down and the kid’s meals were served. The younger girls seem to squirm in their seats, noticeably uncomfortable. It wasn't long before one of them stopped moving, staring off into space. She seemed to concentrate intently on one spot off into the distance and leaned to one side as if trying to tell a secret to the other girl. It only lasted for a few moments and then the girl seemed really self conscious, looking around intently to see if anyone had noticed or was paying attention. With no one seemingly paying attention, she started picking at her kids meal, once again back to her normal self.

The other girl, as ludicrously dressed as the first, began to fidget more but instead of leaning to the side, she leaned forward holding her arms across her stomach. Her face reddened a little, almost unnoticeable as she strained. She stopped suddenly, her face going a brighter red as if she had been startled by something. The first girl suppressed a laugh and pinched her nose. She quickly put her hand down after receiving a stern look from the older woman.

Their issues resolved, the girls resumed eating, giggling jovially as if nothing had happened. They were watched for the entirety of the time they were eating and when the older woman gathered their trash and dumped it into the garbage, the other girls stood up, squirming a little where they stood. The older woman grabbed her purchases and led the girls towards the exits. Their watcher seized upon the opportunity to follow them, slinging their purchases over one shoulder. In the parking lot, their pace quickened and with deliberate intent, they snuck up behind one of the girls and grabbed her as hard as they could on her ruffled behind.

“I knew it wouldn’t be long and you’d be back in diapers!” Leah exclaimed, squeezing a fistful of Kylie’s rear.

Kylie screamed in shock and pseudo-horror. She spun around to attack the person who accosted her to find instead a friendly face.

“Leah? Leah Hammond?! What are you doing here?” Donna and Lucy stopped walking and turned to examine the strange person who seemed to notice Kylie.

“Me? Oh, I just got home from college and wanted to pick up a few things. What happened to you? You just vanished at the end of the semester. I had to keep making excuses for you.”

“I...uh...I had to take care of some things…”

“Take care of some things? Things you couldn’t tell me about? I thought we were friends.”

“We are...it’s just...it was too hard to say.”

“Care to introduce us, Kylie?” Donna interjected, making her presence known. Kylie seemed to be torn between two worlds. The adult Kylie and the baby Kylie.

“Mo- Donna, this is Leah Hammond. We were roommates back in college.” Kylie said, almost calling her Mommy. “And this is my friend, Lucy.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Leah.”

“Likewise.” Leah said. There was a long pause among them as Lucy tried to shrink behind Donna. A soft breeze blew from behind Kylie and Lucy and Leah wrinkled her nose.

“Geez! What’s that smell?” Leah asked, looking around the trio to see if there were any garbage dumpsters nearby. Lucy blushed and tried to hide even more. Kylie dropped her gaze to the ground and Leah quickly picked up on it. “Is that smell coming from you?” She asked.

Kylie flushed red from embarrassment and hung her head with a slow nod of acknowledgment.

“I-It’s….it’s a long story….”

Leah looked at Kylie, taking a good long look at what she was wearing and how her feet were turned in towards each other. Just as a child in trouble would. Lucy was no different. She was clutching Donna’s hand and trying to become invisible.

“I...uh...I...don’t know what to say.” Leah stammered, putting the pieces together.

“Are...are you okay?”

Tears rolled down Kylie’s cheeks as she felt her bladder let go and the front of her diaper swell. She wanted to bawl like a baby, she wanted to scream, she wanted to run, to hide, to die, but most of all, she wanted to be understood. She slowly raised her head, remembering what she had gone through all of this for. Acceptance. She needed people to see her for the real her, not the fake person that she had been showing the world.

“Yes.” She finally said. “I want to explain it all to you. So that you can understand, but not in this parking lot.” She looked over at Donna. “Mommy?” She said deliberately. “Can Leah come over?”

Donna looked at Kylie with a stoic expression, but inside, she was swelling with pride. “If she wants, she is welcome to come along with us.” She said before turning to Leah. “I can bring you back to your car later if you’d like.”

“Sure. I just need to drop this stuff off in my car.” Leah said, shouldering the bags she was carrying.

“Sounds good. We are in that van over there.” Donna said, pointing to her van only a handful of parking spaces away.

“I’ll meet you there.” Leah said, quickly walking away.

Donna led the girls to the van. Kylie was trembling at what she had just done, and Lucy was scared out of her mind. It was fine that Kylie knew her secret as they shared it together, but someone that Lucy didn’t know was far scarier. To add to her stress, she really needed to be changed and the mess in her diaper was a constant reminder of what she had done. She grimaced as she sat in her car seat, waiting to be buckled.

“Momma?”

“Yes, Lucy?”

“I’m scared.”

“Scared? Scared of what?”

“I’m not ready. Kylie maybe, but I’m not ready.”

“I know. And you won’t have to do anything that you aren’t ready for. This is just a part of Kylie’s journey, something she has to do to get better. Your journey will take a different path. Tell you what, while Kylie is talking to her friend, you and I will do our own little thing together. How does that sound?”

“Our own little thing?”

“Sure! You’ve been such a good girl lately and I’m so proud of you.”

“You are? You mean it?”

“Of course I do!” Donna wrinkled her nose. “But how about a bath first? Cause no one likes a stinky girl!”

Lucy giggled and shook her head as Donna fastened the last belt. Donna moved over to buckle Kylie who seemed lost in thought. She didn’t seem fazed as Donna buckled her in.

“Are you sure you want to do this? It’s a huge leap.”

“If I don't do this now, when will I have another chance?”

“It doesn’t mean that you are ready for every opportunity that comes your way.”

“I know, but I can’t face my mother without knowing that I can be accepted by my friends.”

“Is it your mother’s approval that you really seek?”

“I don’t really know. But where else should I start if not here?”

“Good point. However, is this circumstance really the best? Or is it the most convenient?”

“If I can’t be accepted at my worst, then can I be accepted at all?”

Donna smiled and gave Kylie a huge hug. She was so proud of how far Kylie had come and grown. She could see Leah walking up to the van through the window. “No takesy backsies.” Donna joked. “I’m tired of hiding who I really am.”

Donna drove them home with the windows cracked. Leah and Kylie talked about college, avoiding anything that would reference the obvious. There would be a time and place for that discussion and Leah didn’t want Kylie to feel overwhelmed. She had so many questions and so many feelings. She had pondered just running away when she had gotten to her car. She had actually sat in the driver’s seat and held the key to the ignition. What she had thought was a joke had turned out to be more than she had imagined. The last time she had seen Kylie, they were laughing and joking about boys, reveling in the freedom of their adult lives and now, a few scant months since that day, she was facing the real possibility of her friend wearing and using diapers!

Leah was unable to fully wrap her head around the idea. There were too many things that were unanswered that she couldn’t. What she did know was that Kylie seemed happier than she was before. As they talked, Leah couldn’t sense any of that hesitation or doubt that Kylie was known to have. She was confident and self assured. There was an esteem about her, a maturation possible only through great effort. She was more than the scared, insecure girl Leah had once bought pull ups for and although it appeared that she had regressed further in that regard than was thought possible, she was perhaps more mature than Leah was. Older through experience, and more sure of herself.

She had to admit that it was hard to see that from a cursory glance of Kylie. She looked like a child, from the infantile clothing to the car seat she was strapped into. The pacifier that hung off her shirt accented her pigtails and her genial tone reflected her puerile speech patterns. Sprinkled throughout her sentences were bits of baby talk as if she had accepted the physical appearance as part of her adult psyche. Leah couldn’t help but find it all fascinating. She also couldn’t help but continually glance down at Kylie's pubic region where the now unmistakable bulge of her diaper was evident.

The same could be said for the other girl, Lucy, who had the same unmistakable bulge. Lucy was staring out the passenger window, trying to avoid any conversation or notice. While the questions Leah had were more about the entirety of Kylie’s situation, she was intrigued by Lucy’s presence and similar get up. Questions that would have to wait.

Donna pulled into the driveway of the unassuming house. She brought the car to a halt and shut it off. There was an uneasy feeling in the air as she unbuckled the girls and helped them out of the car. Leah stood off to the side, watching everything. Donna led them into the house and Leah mentally held her breath. There was no turning back now.

Part Nine: Affirmation

To say Kylie was anxious was an understatement. Although she had managed to keep calm on the car ride home, the closer they had gotten to their destination, the more anxiety ridden she felt. The condition of her diaper was chief among the causes, as the near hour long ride of sitting in her own mess was hard enough, but to add to her stress level, Leah wanted to engage her in mindless conversation. She both hated and appreciated it though, as it was a good distraction from her thoughts and more importantly her fears.

Mommy Donna was quick to keep things moving. When they arrived at home, she showed Leah to the living room while she rushed Lucy into the bath. Kylie sat on the floor while Leah sat on the couch and there was a palatable awkwardness between them. To make it worse, Apple strood through and handed Kylie a sippy cup of juice. Leah watched Apple’s indifference to the whole situation with interest, especially as Apple wrinkled her nose at the smell emanating from Kylie. As Apple disappeared back into the kitchen, Leah looked at Kylie as if expecting some form of explanation. When she didn’t get one, she felt compelled to ask.

“Who is that?”

“That’s Apple. She lives here and takes care of the house. Sometimes, she helps Donna take care of us.”

“About that...you going to tell me what’s really going on? Like, is this a for real thing or a coincidence?”

“There’s nothing fake about it, if that’s what you mean.”

“So, you are what? An adult that dresses like a baby?”

“I’m an adult that is dressed like a baby, yes.” Kylie said, “And an adult that is a baby.”

“Is a baby? What does that mean?”

“Exactly as it sounds. What do you think of when someone says the word baby?”

“I dunno. A little kid...in diapers.”

Kylie looked at Leah while she pieced it together. It was a short look, but a look nonetheless. Short, because she stood up and walked over to Leah, standing in front of her.

She knew that she smelled but needed to prove a point.

“If you want, pull my pants down and see for yourself. I’m not allowed to touch it.”

“Not allowed to touch what?”

“My diaper.”

Leah looked up at Kylie, seeing nothing but seriousness in her face. She reached out and gingerly pulled down the ruffled pants that Kylie wore. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting to see, but wasn’t surprised to see the shirt Kylie wore to be a onesie. Kylie spread her legs a little and Leah carefully reached between them to pull apart the snaps. Kylie pulled up on her shirt and fully exposed her shame. Leah could see the mess along the edges of the leg holes. The blue line that ran down the middle was bold. Kylie had used the diaper to the fullest and it and her were on full display.

“I...uh...I see.”

Kylie could feel Leah’s hesitation. She waddled backwards a few steps and let her shirt drop, covering most of her diaper.

“I know you have questions and I’ll do my best to answer them. If you want to leave, that’s fine too. I don’t want to try to push this on you.”

“No. No. I’ll stay.” Leah said after a pause. “It’s a lot to take in. And seeing it has more of an impact than imagining it.”

“Does it bother you?”

“No. I mean, I don’t know. I’m not sure what to think. I mean, I bought you your first pack of pull ups, so I’m partially responsible for all of this.”

“No, you’re not. There’s a big leap between pull ups so I don’t tinkle at night and being in full sized diapers 24/7.”

“How did it happen?”

“Well, that’s kind of a tale.” Kylie said, stepping out of her pants. “Do you want to see my room?”

“Your room?”

“Well, I sleep in the basement, but I have a place to play.”

“Well, okay, I guess.” Leah said, standing up. “Lead the way.”

Kylie sank down to be on all fours. “Can you bring my sippy cup?” She asked, crawling out of the living room. Leah grabbed the abandoned sippy cup and followed the crinkling sound as Kylie headed down the hall. Kylie opened the door and shifted from all fours to sitting on her butt. She then started sliding on her butt down the steps into the basement. Leah didn’t know what to expect as she descended the stairs. A line of adult sized cribs threw her off, but not as much as the cabinet nearby stacked to the brim with giant, adult sized diapers.

She could hear the sound of giggles and laughter coming from behind a closed door at the other end of the basement. She deduced that Donna and Lucy were behind the door, most likely cleaning up after Lucy’s messy diaper. She was still trying to wrap her head around all of it when the door opened and Lucy bounded into the room, fully naked. When she saw Leah, she squeaked and ran back into the bathroom to cower behind Donna. Both Leah and Donna smiled at the childish display, and Donna had to lead Lucy out of the room and to her crib. Lucy obediently got into the crib and laid down, her legs hanging over the edge of the mattress.

Donna crossed the room and grabbed one of the large diapers and a can of powder.

Leah watched as Donna expertly powdered and diapered Lucy. For some reason she couldn’t take her eyes off Lucy’s face. She was especially intrigued when Donna pulled the diaper up between Lucy’s legs and held it down. As Donna taped it closed, a glassy, glossiness came over Lucy’s eyes, like the feeling of the diaper had sent her to a far away place. If she had been childish before, she was infantile after. Coming off of the crib mattress, she sunk straight to the floor and crawled over to where Kylie was playing with her toys.

With Lucy taken care of, Donna turned her attention to Kylie. “You’re next!” Ushering Kylie towards the bathroom. Kylie crawled in obedience and Leah felt compelled to follow. For some reason, she had to see if all of this was real.

Kylie was kneeling with her arms up as Donna was pulling her onesie up over her head.

The water was running but the tub wasn’t plugged. Kylie got into the tub and stood there as Donna slowly undid the diaper. She was facing away from Leah when the diaper fell, and Leah was glad that she was. While the smell was offensive enough, seeing the reality was almost too much for Leah. It was everywhere, liberalling coating every part that the diaper covered, even so much as to be slowly being squished up Kylie’s back. Donna turned on the detachable shower head and hosed Kylie down, removing most of the mess with raw water pressure. What she didn’t get off, Donna removed with a lot of soap and a washcloth. Kylie stood there for most of it, only moving when Donna said so, bending, spreading, or whatever was needed and when Donna felt she was clean enough, she pulled the soaking mass of a diaper from the tub, let the water run a little, before plugging it and letting Kylie sit. She added some bath bubbles and tossed in a few bath toys before leaving the bathroom to check on Lucy.

“Make sure she doesn’t try to get out without getting her hair washed.” Donna said to Leah in passing. She left them alone but didn’t close the door all the way on the way out. Leah didn’t know if it was intentional or not, but her focus was on Kylie. Kylie was playing with the toys, pushing them through the bubbles as the water filled the tub. Leah sat down on the edge of the tub and tried to find a way to start a conversation.

“Believe me now?” Kylie said, not looking up from her toys. She took a handful of bubbles of the surface of the water and put them on her head, looking over her shoulder at Leah.

“Yes. I guess that I do. I’m just trying to wrap my head around why.”

“Why what?”

“Why would you want to do that?”

“Do what?”

“You know. That.” She said, emphasizing the last word.

“Poop my pants?” Kylie said, matter of factly.

“Yeah…”

“It’s not as bad as it looked.”

“It looked pretty bad.”

Kylie shrugged. “I guess I’m used to it. Been doing it for months now and it only really bothered me the first few times.”

“But don’t you feel embarrassed?”

“What do I have to be embarrassed about? I wear diapers all night and day. I don’t have a choice in that, or when or where I need to use them. Most people don’t even notice that I’m wearing them when I go out and no one says anything. And I don’t care what anyone has to say.

This is who I am and the only shame I have is that I waited this long to find myself.”

“How is dressing up like a baby finding yourself? Not being disingenuous, I’m just trying to understand.”

“I don’t dress up like a baby. I am a baby. Chronologically, I’m nineteen, but I choose to identify as a three year old toddler.”

Leah paused. Societal trends had people identifying as all sorts of sexes and orientations but this was the first she’d heard of an adult identifying as a baby.

“I...uh...I guess I understand.”

“You don’t understand and that’s fine. How are you expected to grasp this when it took me months of living it to figure it out?”

“I don’t know.”

“You can’t. So take this time while I play in the bubbles to ask any questions you want. When Mommy comes back and I get out of the tub, it’s right back to babyhood and I’m expected to act my age.”

“Okay. So you want to stay like this forever? What about your life? School? All of that?”

“What about it? It didn’t make me happy. This makes me happy.”

“Being a baby makes you happy?”

“It’s part of it. It’s not just being a baby, it's the whole package. Not only do I not have to worry about anything, but I have all of my needs taken care of. I have someone who loves me and takes care of me, understanding that what I need in life isn’t normal and that’s okay. It’s okay to not be normal and to fall into the same lines and traps as everyone else.”

“I get that.” Leah said. “It makes a lot of sense. I guess I don’t see the connection between this and being happy.”

“You ever wet the bed when you weren’t plastered? As an adult I mean?”

“No.”

“Even better, have you ever been in a heated discussion with your mom to the point where you peed yourself in front of her?”

“No. I can’t say that I have.”

“Have you ever had your mother threaten to put you back in diapers and then go through with it because you had an accident?”

“No. That’s never happened to me.”

“So, you’ve never felt so helpless and lost in your life or purpose that you would volunteer for a program that helps you deal with the emotional trauma that caused your bedwetting?”

“I…”

Kylie’s face broke into a smile. “I’m joshing you, Leah. Yeah, I’ve been through some shit and I have some problems. This helps me cope. Is it perfect? No. But it does it’s job.”

“What would you need for it to be perfect? What does perfect even look like?” She reached for taps and shut the water off.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, think about it. You aren’t going to stay here forever, right? At some point you will go home. What does life look like for you past this basement?”

“I haven’t really thought about it.” Kylie stopped playing in the bubbles and was soaking in the hot water. Leah had a good point. While she was happy, she hadn’t thought past her time with Donna.

Leah, meanwhile, went to the door and peeked out to see where Donna was. She was shocked to see that Donna was topless and holding Lucy to her breast. Donna noticed the door slowly opening and looked up to address Leah.

“Can you help Kylie get washed up? I don’t know how long this will take. If she’s done before I am, can you get her into a clean diaper?”

“Ummm, I guess so.”

“Or I can call Apple.”

“No. I think I can do it.”

“Thank you.”

Leah returned to the tub and grabbed a clean washcloth. She didn’t know what she was doing, but she felt compelled to help out.

“You gonna wash me, Leah?”

“I’m going to do my best.”

“Okay!” Kylie said, her voice becoming more childlike.

Leah had babysat before, and Kylie’s projected mentality wasn’t that dissimilar to a young child. She got the washcloth all soapy and went about washing Kylie’s body. It was weird and as awkward as it could be, especially when Leah had to wash Kylie’s chest and other private areas. Kylie took it all in stride, giggling when Leah accidentally tickled her. Shampoo was next and there was a brief window during that time when Leah felt something she hadn’t felt before. Kylie’s innocent demeanor and childlike nature was endearing and for a moment, Leah actually felt like she was taking care of a child. There was a faint tug of maternal instinct.

Washed and clean, Kylie was allowed to play in the water a little bit more until her fingers and toes were all pruney. Leah fetched a towel as Kylie pulled the plug on the tub. She stood up, water and bubbles running down her body. Leah turned the water back on and rinsed the remaining soap off her charge’s body. She helped Kylie out of the tub and wrapped the towel around her. She got another one for Kylie’s hair, patting it dry, and wrapping it up into a towel bun. Kylie covered herself with the towel and headed for the door, her routine kicking in.

The basement was empty and on one of the cribs lay a fresh diaper and the baby powder. Kylie headed straight for it and sat on the edge of the crib, bouncing her legs in anticipation. Leah was uncertain about going through with the next step and wished that Donna was there to take over. Giving a friend a bath was one thing, putting her in a diaper was another. Kylie pulled off the towel around her body and let it fall to the floor. She seemed to be waiting for something.

“I...uh...guess I’m supposed to put this on you.” Leah said, clearly unprepared.

“Nuh uh.” Kylie said in a singsong voice.

“Can you lie back?” Leah asked, gingerly unfolding the diaper. Her lack of confidence and authority made her easy pickings for Kylie.

“I don’t wanna!” Kylie exclaimed, sticking her tongue out.

Leah was getting exasperated but didn’t want to show it. Thankfully, a voice sounded from the top of the stairs and Kylie stiffened up.

“Is she behaving down there, Leah?”

Kylie nodded her head fervently and laid back. She had been busted and she knew it.

“Yeah. Just getting her changed.” Leah said loudly.

“She has a habit of not letting others get her dressed. If that happens, just roll her over and swat her bottom a few times. I’ll be down in a minute to check your work.”

Kylie shook her head, knowing that it wasn’t a threat so much as a promise.

Emboldened, Leah looked at Kylie. “Hear that? I can paddle your little butt if you don’t behave.”

“I be a good girl.” Kylie said, lifting her bottom. Leah went to slide the diaper under her but Kylie interrupted. “You gots to shake it first.” “Shake it?” Leah asked.

“Yeah. Like this.” Kylie made a gesture with her hands and Leah mimicked it. “It fits better that way.” Leah then slid the freshly fluffed diaper under Kylie’s bottom. “Then powder.

First in the diapy and then onto my princess parts.”

Princess parts? Leah wondered. She got the reference but had never heard a girl’s privates labeled that way. She did as Kylie suggested and wondered if she had sprinkled enough. She pulled the front of the diaper up between Kylie’s legs, twisting it from side to side to let it get a tight fit, before laying it over Kylie’s princess parts. She did the tapes like Kylie told her to, bottom ones first, and then the top ones.

Kylie wiggled herself off the crib and stood up, leaning side to side and stretching her legs out. “You did good. Wanna be my babysitter?”

“Babysitter? I just-”

“Leah.” Kylie said, matter of factly, “take the compliment and the confidence. You’re doing great but the hesitation is a turn off.”

Like flipping a switch, Kylie fell back into baby mode and dropped to the floor, crawling back over to the toys. She crinkled noisily as she went and Leah was stuck thinking about what was happening.

Compliment and confidence? What does that mean? And babysitter? She wants me to be her babysitter? I’m so confused.

“It’s easier if you just see her as a little kid and not an adult wearing baby clothes.” Donna said, startling Leah. She had been watching from halfway down the stairs and stopped just next to Leah.

“It’s not easy. Just a few months ago we were talking about boys and parties, and now she’s in a nursery, wearing diapers, and happy.”

“She wasn’t happy?”

“She was scared. She was ashamed of the bedwetting and I tried to help her out. I’ve had a few accidents myself from drinking too much at parties, so I took her and bought us each a pack of pull ups. They are far more versatile than they look.”

“Yes they are, and she will need to get back into them before too long.”

“You are making her?”

“She doesn’t have a choice. To complete this program, she has to go through a full regression back to babyhood and then back to adulthood. In doing so, she has the time and care needed to assess the cause of her bedwetting.”

“But she seems so happy like this.”

“Because she is. However, she can’t use this state as a shield. She still needs to confront her demons, as it were, for her to be able to truly move forward. Today was a big step for her. For most, seeking the approval, well, not approval, more like acceptance. She wanted to share this with you and is seeking your acceptance. For her to be able to move forward, it can’t just be her accepting herself, which she’s done, but it also has to be her friends and family that accept her too.”

“I’m still unsure as to how and why.”

“Those things don’t matter. What matters is that you can look at her as she is and still see your friend. Or are you repulsed by all of this? Would you still be friends with her outside of this place knowing what you know now? And, should she need it, would you be willing to take care of her in this state?”

“I…”

“You don’t need to answer yet. And you don’t need to answer to me. Those questions are for you and you alone.”

“Okay. What do you think I should do?”

“Well, first, you can give her this.” Donna said, handing Leah a full bottle of warm milk. “Feed her like you would feed a baby. And second, spend time with her. Get to know this side of her. You changed her like a pro, so you have that going for you.”

“You want me to change her again?”

“Only if she trusts you enough. That’s the foundation of all of this. Trust. She trusts you enough to reveal this part to her. You’ve seen the worst this has to offer, and yet you are still here. You stepped up when you didn’t have to and you are sticking with it even though you don’t understand it. She sees that. She knows that what she’s asking is a lot to take in, but she also knows that of all the people she could have told, you were the only one she trusted enough.”

Leah was silent for a few moments while she watched Kylie play with some stuffed animals. She never figured that her relationship with Kylie was that close. Her sexual experience had far outclassed Kylie’s and she thought that they had very little in common. Yet, there was something there, something that Leah felt pulling at her soul.

“Don’t let that get cold. She doesn’t like it cold.” Donna said, turning away and heading back upstairs.

Leah looked at the bottle in her hand, it was larger than normal and as she walked it over to Kylie, she thought about what Donna had said. While she didn’t fully understand what Kylie was going through, she wasn’t ready to give up on her friend.

“Baba?” Kylie asked, looking up at Leah.

“Are you hungry?” Leah asked in return.

“Baba!” Kylie exclaimed, clapping her hands. She made room for Leah to sit down and no sooner had Leah planted her butt, Kylie laid across her lap.

“You going to be a good girl for me?” Leah asked, holding Kylie’s head in the crook of her arm.

“Uh huh.”

Leah lowered the nipple to Kylie’s parting lips and within moments, Kylie was happily sucking away.

“That’s a good girl.” Leah said, settling in and getting comfortable. While it all felt weird, at least when she looked at Kylie, it didn’t feel wrong. She couldn’t explain why or how yet, but as she searched her feelings, she didn’t find anything wrong with what she was doing.

Kylie, meanwhile, was having thoughts and feelings of her own. She had been using her little side as a shield ever since Leah had grabbed her butt in the mall parking lot. She wasn’t ready to expose herself to the world as a functioning little. She hadn’t expected the world to find her out so quickly. To be honest, she was terrified. She had expected to have a difficult conversation with her mother at some point but beyond that, the only people that were supposed to know were in the house with her. Lucy, Donna, Apple, and Mark, that was it. To have Leah ambush her in a public place was not a part of the plan.

To add insult to injury, she was in the worst state she could be in at the time and Leah correctly deducing not only what she was wearing but the state of it was beyond humiliating. She was so ashamed of her condition and mortified that Leah would tell people about it that she had shut down, retreating into her little self and hiding her adult emotions away.

I didn’t expect her to stick around. Especially after seeing the state of my diaper. I can’t believe that she bathed me. It was...kinda nice… And got me changed! Now she’s giving me a baba?! This isn’t so bad. I think she’d make a good big sister. I always kind of looked up to her like that when we were in college together. Older, more experienced. Wiser. Well, if there’s wisdom in getting plastered every weekend. God, her touches feel good! I wonder if she will stay and take care of me. I hope someone is willing to take care of me…

Kylie was most of the way through her bottle when her eyes started to droop. Leah had been off in her thoughts when she happened to look down and see Kylie falling asleep. The bottle was almost empty but she couldn’t quite tell if Kylie was still eating or if she was instinctively going through the motions. She was only in her diaper and after a quick glance, she could tell that Kylie had wet herself

It’s like she doesn’t even know what’s happening to her. It’s like what she said, she’s not like a baby. She is a baby. And she needs someone to take care of her. She wants me to take care of her? Why would she want me? I barely know her.

A hollow noise pulled her attention away from her thoughts. She looked down to see that the bottle was empty. She pulled it from Kylie’s lips and saw Kylie’s eyes flutter open.

“Was that a good baba?” Leah asked.

“The bestest!” Kylie said.

“It...uh...appears that you are wet.”

“Nuh uh.”

“Would you like me to change you?”

“No. Play time!” Kylie sat up sharply and started playing with her toys.

“Later, perhaps.” Leah said, setting the bottle aside.

“Or not.” Adult Kylie said, her back to Leah.

“Huh?”

“If there’s one thing I’ve learned through all of this is that you need to assert yourself. Did you know that I never stood up for myself? I always followed what others wanted me to do but then I learned that if I want to be happy, I need to take control of my life and the direction it heads. That’s why I’m here. To seize control of my life. And you know how I did that? By giving control of my life to someone else. I have all the control because I trust someone else to know what’s best for me. I can say yes or no to anything that could happen to me. Do you know why you were able to do what you’ve done to me? Because I allow it to happen.”

“Okay…”

“So, when I allow you to take control of me, I do so because I trust you. I trust that you know what’s best for me, be it a change or a bottle or a nap. I trust that you will recognize your role and keep me in mine.”

“I...I’m afraid that I don’t understand.”

“She wants you to tell her what to do, and if she resists, punish her for her disobedience.” A new voice said. Both Kylie and Leah turned to see Apple standing nearby, her hands tucked behind her back, like she was hiding something. “Isn’t that right, Kylie?” “Yes, Miss Apple.” Kylie said, her childish voice returning.

“So when Miss Leah says that you have wet yourself and asks if you want a change, what should you say?”

“I supposed to say, yes, Miss Leah.”

“That’s correct. And what would happen if you tell any big person no?” Kylie whined instead of responding. She knew where things were headed.

“Answer me, Kylie or I’ll go get you mother.”

“I get a `panking!”

“That’s correct.” Apple said. “And I heard that you had one coming from earlier today, so if I were you, I’d be on my best behavior. And Leah, don’t hesitate to put your foot down. Little girls like Kylie need a lot of direction and a firm hand from time to time.”

“A firm hand, huh?” Leah pondered, looking at Kylie, who was trying to shrink into nothingness.

“I be a good girl!” Kylie exclaimed.

“A good girl, huh? We will see. Get up in your crib and let’s get you changed.”

“Yes, Miss Leah.” Kylie said, crawling over to her crib. She was wetter than before, as if the confrontation had made her bladder let go. Her diaper had a little sag to it. She crawled up into her crib and laid down.

“That’s a good girl, Kylie! Now, what color diaper do you want to wear?” Leah asked.

“Puppies!”

“Puppies isn’t a color, wait, what’s this? Puppy Pampers?” “Puppo! Puppo!” Kylie chanted.

“It seems as if you have this under control.” Apple stated, heading towards the stairs. “Remember that you are the adult and she is the child.”

“I will.”

“And don’t be afraid of discipline. Better her than you.” Apple said, disappearing up the stairs.

“Better you than me?” Leah asked Kylie. “What does that mean?”

“Me no no.”

“I see. Well, let’s see here. We have a diaper, some powder, and all we need is the wipes.” She looked around near the cabinet full of diapers and found a box of wipes. “There we go. Nothing to worry about here, just changing a diaper. That’s it. That’s all I’m doing.” “Are you okay with this, Leah?” Adult Kylie asked.

“Yeah, I think so. It’s just getting my head to accept what my eyes see. Do you trust me enough to do this? I mean, I would have to touch you...down there and all.”

“Yes. I’m used to it. It’s not sexual, it’s hygienic.”

“Okay. Can I ask you a question while I do this?”

“Sure.”

Leah pulled open the tabs on the diaper and tried not to think of the adult wearing them.

“Why me? I mean. I’m honored and all, but I don’t know if I’m the right person for this.” “For what?” Kylie asked, twitching a little bit as the cold wipe hit her skin.

“For all of this.”

“Are you not enjoying yourself?”

“I am.”

“But?”

“But I don’t know if I’m any good at this.”

“I think you are doing rather well. You could stand to be a little more bossy, but otherwise, not bad.”

“You want me to be more bossy?”

“I want you to enjoy taking care of me as much as I enjoy being taken care of.”

“You’re enjoying this?”

“Of course. I was worried about how you would react and feel towards me when you saw the truth, but you haven’t run away and are giving this an honest try. I love that. I love that you care about me enough to not just run away or laugh at me. Acceptance is the hardest thing for someone like me to obtain. I can accept myself all day long, but if I don’t have some level of real world support, then all of this has been for nothing.”

Leah set the used wipes aside and unfolded the fresh diaper, loosening it up as Kylie had shown her the first time. She slid it into place and reached for the powder.

“I guess I’m just worried about not giving you what you are looking for or need.”

“And that, that right there, is exactly why I trust you. You are considering my needs or wants when you are making a decision. That shows me that you care. So, if it comes to it, and you have to discipline me, I won’t resist.”

“And you are okay with that as well?” Leah asked, pulling the diaper up between Kylie’s legs.

“Can I tell you a little secret?”

“After today? You can tell me anything.” She said, taping it closed.

Kylie blushed a little and whispered. “I kind of like it.”

“Like what?”

“Being bossed around. Punished.”

“Can I ask why?”

“I don’t really know. I don’t like the pain so much as being submissive. Having someone bend me to their will is exciting, and humiliating, but when it’s over, I know that I’m still loved.”

“Let me get this straight. You don’t like it, but you like it?”

“Yes.” Kylie said, sitting up. “It’s hard to explain but it’s just how I am. I know it sounds weird but can you just go with me on it?”

“Certainly. I mean, who am I to judge?”

“Good. And thanks. It means a lot to me that you are here.”

“Yeah?”

“Absolutely.” Kylie said, sliding off the crib and down to the floor. “Cause-” “Kylie! Come up here this instant!” Donna’s shout thundered down the stairs.

Kylie seemed to quiver and shake before slowly crawling up the stairs. Leah followed, dropping the used diaper in the trash at the base of the stairs. She didn’t know what caused the tonal shift, but Kylie seemed scared and nervous.

In the living room sat Donna. Nearby was Lucy, playing on the floor, and in the chair across from the couch, sat Apple. Kylie instantly knew what was wrong. Everything about how Donna was sitting pointed to one clear answer.

Apple must have told Donna about Kylie being resistant to Leah in the basement. Her pose, her tone, and her look said it all. Kylie was well overdue for a behavior adjustment.

“Ah, Leah. Good. I see that you have changed the baby. You are a natural at this. So natural in fact, that I have need of you for one more thing.”

“Okay, and that is?”

“It seems that Kylie is acting a little too big for her britches and the best way to correct that behavior is to do what? Kylie, do you know?”

Kylie hung her head, knowing there was only one answer. “Spanking.”

Donna smiled and looked at Leah, “Leah, the honor is all yours. Do you accept?”

Part Ten: Awakening

Leah felt her bravado leave her almost immediately. She had been sitting there, watching Kylie as she lay across Donna’s lap and then Apple’s, receiving an authentic spanking from both of them. Her mind used the word authentic because her hand didn’t know what it meant. She obviously understood the mechanics, hand hits bottom, rinse and repeat, but she’d never bore witness to a true spanking until today. Donna hadn’t wasted any time stripping Kylie’s diaper down around her ankles, except for when she remarked at how tight the fit was, praising Leah for her work, before pulling Kylie across her lap. She was a good twenty or so slaps in before she said anything, chastising Kylie for her disobedience at the mall. Her hand never stopped moving, however, and it wasn’t long before Kylie’s bottom grew red. Kylie squirmed and whined, but didn’t cry. She tried her best not to show the pain. It wasn’t easy, and she failed not long after. Donna was efficiently able to elicit a struggle. Kylie knew better than to try to get in the way.

From Donna, Kylie wiped the tears from her face and slowly walked across the room to Apple. She couldn’t take any real strides with the diaper at her ankles. She prostrated herself across Apple’s lap in a clear sign of submission. Apple was just as prolific as Donna, albeit with a different tactic. While Donna assaulted the meat of Kylie’s bottom, Apple went around the edges, specifically near the hip bones and where Kylie’s thighs met her butt. She didn’t have the strength of ferocity that Donna had, but because those areas were more tender and susceptible, Kylie cried and flailed just as much. It was short lived, but effective, and when she finally stopped, there was little respite for Kylie.

“Go to Leah now.” Donna said. “You need to remember your place and how you are supposed to behave around adults.” Kylie hesitated for a brief second, but shuffled over to Leah and stood next to her. “Now what do you say?”

Through choked back tears, Kylie looked at Leah with a face of sheer misery. “I...I sowwy, Miss Leah.”

Taking a cue from Donna and Apple, Leah played the role. “I suspect that you are, Kylie, but your disobedience can not go unpunished.” She said, taking Kylie by the hand and pulling her over her lap. “You need to be reminded that you are a baby and must do what you are told.”

“Y-yes, Miss Leah.”

Leah felt her bravado leave her at that point. She could talk the talk but had no idea on how to walk the walk. Her experience with spanking anyone was a few playful slaps to a drunk girl’s ass while boys laughed and cheered. There was no intent to do harm or cause pain. It was like foreplay and it never led to anything more than the occasional drunken girl kiss. She thought about what Kylie had said when she was getting changed: I kinda like it.

Her hand fell across Kylie’s ass with little force, but it was Kylie’s reaction that said it all. Kylie squirmed and whimpered, not in pain, but in sensual matter. Emboldened, Leah brought her hand down again, a little harder, and a little faster, achieving the same response. Donna and Apple seemed to approve, though they didn’t notice or care about the fact that Leah wasn’t causing Kylie any pain.

Excited in her own way, Leah dug into her memories and brought up something that had happened to her. While a few playful slaps had been fun, one guy she had been with had taken playful slaps a bit too far. She took that and used it on Kylie, doing quick, simple slaps at a rapid pace from cheek to cheek. She was aimed for the base where the term apple bottom got the apple descriptor. There was no reprieve for Kylie and what started as soft playful slaps quickly became anything but. She squirmed and whined, kicking her feet and flailing her arms. Leah, without pause or thought, took a handful of Kylie’s hair, held it firm, and pulled back on it slightly. The result, for Kylie, was immediate. Her shoulders pulled back a little, and her back arched, sticking her bottom out farther, giving Leah more access. Leah capitalized on it and with every flurry of light slaps and a tug on Kylie’s hair, she made sure that Kylie wasn’t in a position to resist. She just had to lay there and take it.

When Leah’s hand was numb and Kylie’s backside was beat red, Donna finally waved to Leah to stop. Leah helped Kylie to her feet, noticing something that no one else seemed to notice. She kept it to herself as she pulled up Kylie’s diaper. It was a tight fit over Kylie’s sore bottom, and it added one last layer of humiliation and subjugation. Leah gave her another pat on the bottom before holding her arms open for Kylie to sit on her lap. Kylie, sniffling still, with tears running down her face, sat carefully down on Leah’s lap, burying her head in Leah’s shoulder. Donna handed Leah a pacifier and with a tap on Kylie’s cheek, she slid the pacifier into Kylie’s mouth. Leah rocked back and forth slightly while rubbing Kylie’s back. Donna watched all of it with a proud interest.

Donna was impressed with how well Leah handled herself. While rocky at first, she seemed to grow into her own. Kylie also seemed to respond well to Leah, like they had a chemistry that went beyond just friends. She was a little saddened that Kylie had found someone else but was excited to see her in the hands of someone who was willing to put in the effort. She knew that she was reading into the situation, perhaps seeing more than was really there, however, she felt that her and Kylie had reached the extent of their relationship. The last hurdle that Kylie had was facing a father figure but she had to think long term. Donna wanted to talk to Leah and see how she felt about all of this. Lucy had watched the entire ordeal and was quietly sitting nearby, yawning and playing with her toys. She was due for a nap, and therefore, so was Kylie.

“Naptime girls!” Donna said, standing up. She took Kylie by the arm, pulling her hand away from her face and gently getting her off of Leah’s lap. She went straight to crawling, and disappeared with Lucy down the hall and into the basement. Apple got up and headed off to the kitchen, leaving Leah to sit with her thoughts. Her mind raced over everything that she had witnessed and done and she didn’t know how to process it all.

Donna reappeared by herself. She smiled at Leah and went into her room. She came back out with her purse and her keys. “Are you ready, Leah?”

Leah nodded and stood up. She followed Donna outside to the van and got in the passenger seat. Donna started the car and headed back towards the mall where they had met.

“You handled yourself very well today, Leah. I must say that I’m impressed.”

“I tried to just go with things. I don’t really know what I’m doing.” Leah said modestly.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, you were rather impressive and Kylie seems to really like you.”

“She’s a special girl. I have to say that.”

“That she is. How did all of this make you feel?”

“I, uh, well, it’s a lot. It’s a lot to take in and a lot to wrap my head around. I don’t fully understand all of it but I tried to play along as best as I could.”

“You have her approval if that matters.”

“Her approval?”

“Yes. She likes you taking care of her and wants you to come back again.”

“Even after I spanked her?”

“She had that coming well before we ran into you, but you needed to establish where you sit in that power dynamic. She will respect you and behave better for you knowing that you are not opposed to disciplining her when needed. That is, if you want to spend more time with her.”

“I think I do. I want to understand this better.”

“That’s good. I’m glad to hear it. Now, do you have any questions?”

“Yeah. I have a lot of questions but I also need time to process everything before I get overloaded.”

“Which is very mature of you to say. That said, I do have to stress that you keep this to yourself. While she trusts you with her secret, she doesn’t want it proclaimed to the world.”

“I won’t tell anyone. I wouldn’t want her telling anyone that I wear pull ups occasionally.”

Leah said, then quickly added, “Not to be construed as I want to wear diapers, because I don’t.”

“I didn’t say that you did. No. I don’t think what Kylie is going through would help you. I don’t think you need my brand of help at all. What I do think is that you have been looking for a

sense of purpose and you are confused to the point where you may have found what you are looking for but it wasn’t what you were expecting.”

“I don’t really know.”

“I don’t expect you to. You look like you need to do some soul searching.”

“Or something. It’s just….god, there are so many things that I can’t get my head around.”

“The answers are there, when you are ready for them, and maybe it’s best that you not ask them so much as look for them yourself. It would be too hard for me to try to explain it to you when you could just see her journey and experience things with her.”

“But not as a baby.”

“Obviously not. As a babysitter, though, you can see how she experiences the world and get an idea on how it looks from her point of view.”

“I...I think that could work. She seems to like me taking care of her, even if I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“You know far more than you let on and let me just say that you handled yourself well. I’d be willing to hire you as a sitter for Kylie if you would be interested.”

“Could I take her out of the house?”

“Sure. I’d have a few rules I’d like you to follow but nothing major.”

“Like?”

“We won’t get into that yet. She’s not ready for something like that.” Donna said, turning into the mall. “I’ll tell you what. Let me get her out of diapers and into pull ups and then she can go out with you. You are welcome to come see her any day, but she can’t leave the house until that point unless accompanied by me.”

“Fair enough.”

“Then it’s settled. Put your number into my phone and we can work out the details later.” “Okay.” Leah said, adding her number to Donna’s virtual rolodex.

“Oh, and one more thing,” Donna said as Leah opened the car door, “if you are uncomfortable with any of this, you need to let me know before Kylie gets too attached.”

Leah paused, holding the door open with her foot. “Honestly, I’m not comfortable with any of it because I don’t know enough about it to be comfortable with it. But that doesn’t mean that I would be mean or anything to Kylie because of it. She told me today that she trusts me with this and I want to make sure that I’ve earned that trust.”

“That’s understandable. Most people that get introduced to this world like you have just shut down and reject it. You haven’t done that yet so if you are interested, I have a few things you could look up that may help you get an understanding of what all of this is.” Donna typed out a few things on her phone and sent them as a message to Leah. “Start there and if you want to talk about it and the healthy way it’s implemented, I usually stay up until eleven. I generally have to do a feeding at ten before the girls go to bed.”

“I don’t know how you do it. Honestly.”

“Do what?”

“Talk about breastfeeding two adults like it’s a regular occurence to you.”

“It is a regular occurrence for me. It’s not like they gain anything from it beyond the extra bit of regression that comes from nursing from me. That’s not really the point though. Take some time to think all of this through. I’d like to see you with Kylie again in a few days if you are still up to it.”

“Okay.”

“One last thing. I just wanted you to know that no matter what you decide, I’m thankful that you took the time to try. I also wanted you to know that I’m proud of you.”

“You’re proud of me? Why?”

“Let’s just say that I have it on good authority that you are one of a kind.” With that, Donna drove away, leaving Leah to contemplate what she had said.

As Leah drove home, she replayed the day’s events back in her mind. With so much that had happened that needed to be processed, it was hard for her to sort through it all. When she got home, she wasn’t any better off. She was putting her new lingerie purchases away when she uncovered the pull ups she had stashed away. She felt odd holding them in her hand, as if they were a relic of some age gone by. She heard footsteps coming up the stairs and hurriedly packed them back away. She didn’t know why she felt compelled to keep them a secret.

She sat on her bed and scrolled through her phone. She was trying to find something that could get her mind off of the day’s events. A lot of the conversations she was having seemed pointless now. Her world had just expanded rapidly and the limited view she used to have made the conversations feel stale. Exhausted and with the day turning to night, she set her phone down and closed her eyes. She could still smell the baby powder on her hands. It made her smile, like she just had some hidden experience that she couldn’t talk about. She drifted off to sleep thinking about Baby Kylie. Her college friend was gone, but her little friend was still there, and there was great joy to be found with her little friend.

Isaac Summers, now Isabell, looked around her new apartment with glee. Her time with Lori Gillis had ended and she was finally free to fully express herself. While she missed her old self to a certain degree, she didn’t miss him that much. Lori had helped Isaac realize his true potential and his real desires. He didn’t want to be himself anymore, he wanted to be the self that he felt inside. A female self. He discussed the matter with Lori one night after a particular vigorous session. While she was normally the one that controlled everything in the house and the relationship, he was allowed to speak his honest truth. She didn’t get upset, or even annoyed. She listened, she cared, and more importantly, she was supportive. He made her a promise that he would continue living his life to maximise his happiness and she promised that no one would ever know what he’d gone through or done. She helped him find a place of his own to live and when he moved out of her closet, he left Isaac behind. He had left the only key to his chastity device on her nightstand and stepped out into the world as Isabell. He was terrified of the notion of trying to start over, but it was the only path left in front of her. She would miss Lori. Beyond the physical, Lori was a good person at heart that just wanted what was best, but she knew deep down that Lori really needed to mend the bridge between her and her daughter.

Isabell didn’t really know how to help. She was too wrapped up in her own issues to feel like she was of any use, but as she unpacked the rest of her clothes from Lori’s, she felt as if she had to do something. The one thing she could think of was the one secret she had to keep from Lori. She knew where Kylie was. Her job at the Institute enabled her to have access to files that Lori wasn’t privy to. Isabell had to move and catalogue all the communiques that went between Moira’s office and her department. A majority of the time, the information was nothing of importance, and she hadn’t been snooping until the title of the communication caught her eye.

Titled: In Regards To The Pod Potential, it wasn’t even the most clever of titles. The pod portion was the most peculiar, so she opened the document and was astonished by what was contained within. While the technology was remarkable, it was the girls involved that piqued her interest. Kylie Gillis and Lucy Hernandez. Two names that caused whispers and hushed comments throughout the offices whenever they were mentioned. It was impossible to find someone who hadn’t heard or didn’t have an opinion on what allegedly had happened. Worse, with Lori being the head boss and Kylie’s mother, there was no way to get the whole story. So everyone made up tales of their own. Even Isaac, whom many knew lived with Lori, didn’t have the whole story.

Isabell knew that she couldn’t take what she knew to Lori. Moira would have her head. She would have to be clever with this information. She looked around her empty apartment that still needed updated furniture and sighed. There was much that needed to be done, and yet, she wasn’t the least bit stressed. Her imagination ran wild and she hit on an idea. A housewarming party. A simple, yet ingenious way to get people together, disguised as a normal celebratory function. Excited, she set about looking for affordable furniture on her phone.

Life returned to a semblance of normal for Lori. With Isaac/ Isabell gone, she had the house to herself again. It was strange to have the house so empty, and now she had to clean it herself. She thought about hiring Isabell as a maid. She had done a great job keeping the house clean while Lori was working late. In all honesty, Lori missed the help, but not as much as she missed Kylie. It had been nearly a year since all of this started and she wondered if it was all worth it. She regretted all of it, wishing instead that she had just taken the time to spend with Kylie, none of this would have happened.

She couldn’t dwell on it though as it wouldn’t get her anywhere. She was slowly learning that all of the things that she had wanted in life left her feeling empty. She had the social status, a respectable career, and acquaintances, but nothing that she felt was valuable. What she had, instead, was empty titles and unnecessary platitudes. She didn’t feel respected, only feared.

She didn’t feel liked, only tolerated. And she didn’t feel wanted, just a means to an end.

These feelings left her in a strange place. Unhappy emotionally, but content physically. Her time with Isabell had shown her that her prudish ways and narrow minded thinking were relics of the past, just like her mother’s lectures. Ancient colloquialisms that kept her from experiencing life and unintentionally dated her. She pondered what was the point of it all. If life was the pursuit of happiness, then who should say what makes a person happy? Isaac, for all of his perversions, had a clear view of what would make him happy and when it was given to him and Isabell appeared, it was a glorious moment. That moment stuck with Lori. If Isaac, someone whom she thought was clearly a deviant, could find the kind of happiness that Lori envied, what was she doing wrong? More importantly, what if it was Kylie instead of Isaac? Shouldn’t she want her own daughter to find that kind of happiness?

Time without distractions or conversations gave her a lot of time to think and soul search. The last thing she didn’t want to be like her mother and she didn’t want to be ostracized by her daughter. To make it right, she had to change not only how she presented herself, but how she handled special circumstances like Kylie’s. With a new resolution to not be the person she was, Lori vowed to make Kylie’s return home something she could be proud of.

The bars under the bed seemed larger than normal. She watched the morning routine of the man in the bed. The routine was the same as normal. Nothing had changed except for the views of the girl under the bed. The other three girls in the house had changed the tone and mood. The man was less in control and less vocal, spending most of his time in the chair or in the bed. With little for the girl under the bed to do, she cleaned what she could and stayed out of the way, but it didn’t help. At night, after the other three were sleeping, the girl under the bed was brought onto the bed and used as the man saw fit. It wasn’t unusual. That was the agreement. That was the lie. That was her life. But something had changed. Cracks in the man’s visage began to show, and his frustrations with the other three girls turned into a bitter resentment and a subtle cruelty. Her chores were increased, his critique harder, and her punishment worse. Pain was a familiar friend and humiliation a loving sister.

What the three girls offered was a chance, an opportunity, and a way out. She kept it all to herself, alone and abandoned under the bed. He never went down there. He never looked. She knew she had to go slow. Piece by piece, she had to work behind the scenes, letting the chips fall where they may. She couldn’t draw any attention to her plan for it would all blow up in her face and the retribution would be brutal.

She liked to attribute her awakening to the increase in his cruelty, but that cruelty had always been there. She could remember the first time she met him and the long series of secret events that led to her living with him full time. She could remember many things, but most importantly, she could remember her name.

It came to her after spending time with Kylie. The younger girl couldn’t have possibly known anything about her, or her past, but seemed to emulate behaviors that were distinctively hers. Kylie and Lucy were playing with dolls in the living room, innocently enough, and as she checked on them while doing her chores, she felt like she was a part of an out of body experience. There was something in the way Kylie was acting, with her hair done up in pigtails, prancing around the living room with her doll that seemed so familiar. The memory played out in unison with Kylie and Lucy’s play and Apple could see the child version of her dancing around the room like Kylie was. Stuck on the memory, Apple stood in the doorway of the kitchen and watched it play out, her mind recalling things that she had forgotten. The girls laughed and played, carrying on in a carefree sense and she could see her younger self, a small child of 7 or 8 dancing along with Kylie.

A ghostly memory of a woman came from the kitchen, walking through Apple and sending a chill down her spine. The apparition stopped in front of her and Apple watched Kylie and her memory self through the misty haze of the apparition. The apparition spoke as young Apple tossed her toy at the other girl.  Four syllables and the opening of a buried chest of memories.

“Sarah Walker!”

With the name came a tsunami of memories, ranging from early childhood to adulthood. They grew darker the closer they got to adulthood, as if there was some malevolent force suppressing them. They were overwhelming and caused Apple to grow dizzy. Her vision blurred and she leaned against the doorframe.

She held her hands to her face as her mind was overcome with memories. She chased the rabbit, following any and every memory that may explain what happened to her. Somewhere in the depths of a dark memory was someone familiar. She tried so hard to identify the person but could only hear faint tones in their voice. They were not alone and the other voice was just as familiar. Their words were garbled, like they were being filtered through some sort of sound dampening material. From what she could see and feel, she was in some sort of enclosure. It was claustrophobic and filled her with a sense of panic and dread. The memory went dark and she tried to dial it back to another one.

He was stern and strict, the faceless man that towered over her. She had done something wrong, something she couldn’t remember, and he was scolding her. Something felt off, weird and unnatural. The memory played out and she had little to no control. His words were full of anger and loathing. She looked down to see the white mass between her legs, felt hot tears run down her face and as she looked back up, her eyes clamped closed as his hand thundered across her face.

Shattered memories, many playing out similarly than the last racked her mind. Her knees gave out and she crumpled to the floor. Kylie and Lucy broke out of their characters and rushed to Apple’s side, calling out to her and to Donna. Between the three of them, they managed to lift Apple up onto the couch. Donna got a bowl of cold water and a cloth, dampening it and holding it to Apple’s forehead. Apple was muttering incoherent phrases, like she was talking in her sleep. She mumbled phrases akin to “No!” “I’ll be good!” “Sorry, Daddy!”

The memories came faster and faster, overwhelming her. The darkness that had started to creep into her teenage years consumed her adult ones. With the darkness came the pain. Pain, torment, and destruction. Like the visage of her younger self, Apple saw her memories as a bystander. She watched as the faceless man controlled her. Used her. Hurt her. She did everything she could to be a good girl, everything to make him happy, but nothing would. There were so many memories of her trying and trying yet failing and failing. He would always demean her. Nothing was good enough. Nothing ever would be until he had ultimate control. She remembered the first time she went under the bed. She remembered how much it terrified her, those bars feeling like they were getting closer and closer. She remembered the panic. The gut wrenching anxiety of the little gate closing and the lock clicking shut. She remembered the sleepless nights spent curled in a ball paralysed by fear.

And then there was nothing. The emotions were gone. Replaced by a numbness that seemed to permeate every part of her existence. The pain was still there, the object humiliation was still there, but the feelings were gone. He persisted regardless. Using and abusing, worse and worse, but there was nothing. He ordered and she complied. He hurt and she approved. The girl that used to feel was now a shell. A tool. A toy. She was nothing to him. He would bring other girls home and have his way with them as well. But not like her. He saved the worst for her. The girls kept coming. Year after year, girl after girl. The numbness slowly faded to acceptance. This was her life; there was nothing before, and there would be nothing else after.

Sarah’s eyes snapped open and she lurched onto her side to vomit onto the floor. Everything was so nauseating. Every memory, every violation, every thought, feeling, and emotion. It all came up with the acidic fluids of her stomach. She barely ate anything anyway. He had programmed her to maintain her figure and she hoped the burning bile would help sear the memories away. It didn’t. If anything, it made them more real as the pain in her throat mirrored the pain in her soul.

“Apple? Are you okay?” Kylie asked, looking on from across the room.

“I’m not Apple. Never call me that again!” Kylie shrunk back at the hate filled tone Apple used. She looked up from the stinking puddle of fluids to look at Kylie, wiping her wrist across the back of her hand. “I’m sorry, Kylie. I’m not mad at you. I remembered some things that were really upsetting.”

Kylie’s lip quivered and Sarah could see the regression flash across her face. She was protecting herself behind her little state, her face a mix of hurt and concern.  “I’ll be fine, Kylie. I just need to clear my head.”

Donna took the cloth and the bowl of water and began cleaning up the floor. Sarah immediately felt a twinge of shame at the mess she had caused. “I’ll take care of that, Donna.

It’s my mess, I’ll clean it up.”

“I think you need to take a moment or two for yourself, Sarah.”

“Wait, you know my name?”

“I do.”

“Is that all you know?”

“No. I know a lot about you, the real you.”

“What happened to me?”

“I think you know, or at least, remember most of it.”

Sarah closed her eyes and sighed. “It’s all a jumbled mess. I can’t put it into order.”

“Then perhaps I can help. Where would you like to start?”

“The beginning I guess.”

“Very well.” Donna said. She took the bowl and cloth into the kitchen and rinsed them out. She dried her hands and returned to the living room, sitting on the couch near Sarah, undoing her shirt. She motioned for Kylie to sit on her lap and once situated, began feeding her. “Your story is one that I hoped would never repeat. It’s a tale that should never have needed to be told.”

“Wanna skip to the good parts? My head is killing me.”

“I could, but there is a lot here. You were a part of the first group the Institute treated. While there had been a lot of successes prior to that, your particular group was the first official test group. A trial by fire, if you will. Many of us had only had one or two successful treatment sessions. We were young and full of idealistic notions of grandeur.

“You were assigned to Mark after Moira’s attention got pulled elsewhere. She was leading a burgeoning company at the time and she didn’t have a lot of time for you. Mark had never treated anyone in this way, and didn’t know what he was getting himself into. While later in life, he developed the skills and compassion necessary to be a successful therapist, he didn’t know anything when all of this started.

“Now, what happened to you could be conveniently explained away as a casualty of an untested program and inexperienced staff, but the failures go far deeper than that. You came to the Institute because you were an unruly teenager. That’s it. No great revelation there and by our standards today, you wouldn’t have even gotten into the program, but we were just starting out and would take anyone.

“That said, we didn’t really know what we were doing. Everything we did in those days worked off of the success of Moira’s first client, where she regressed her husband. He was a willing participant. Most of the first group wasn’t, especially when the regression started. A lot of them fell in line, slowly accepting the treatment, and we used that data to form the skeleton of what the program is today.

“While we knew we had to adapt around our clients, there were a few that tried to adapt our clients around us. While they had many good points, their methods were hard to justify and that’s where you came in.

“From the analysis of the situation, you weren’t the worst client. You were stubborn, for sure, but were slowly coming around to the idea that you needed help. Well, that your parents wanted you to get help. You weren’t really going through with the regression, just playing the part, and Mark was getting particularly frustrated with your lack of progress. The report of your situation has glaring omissions of what really happened, but we pieced it together that he was abusing his authority and, unfortunately, abusing you.

“Moira was adamant that we couldn’t have any failures. Failures meant that we couldn’t gain the support needed to further fund the Institute until the clientele fees kicked in. Moira is not a woman that likes looking bad. In truth, there were a lot of failures in the beginning. Our one hundred percent success rate is a metric that didn’t kick in until after you, and the creation of the pods.

“The pods as I know them today are nothing like what they used to be. Any corporation has buried secrets and this one is no different. The first generation of the pods were akin to the archaic treatments of the mentally ill. Think of them as the shock treatment for behavior issues. The intent was pure. I was on the board that developed them, but they were never approved for actual use.

“Behind everyone’s back, Mark and Moira decided to test them out on a few of the more difficult clients. Of the four that were chosen, you were the only one to survive. They aren’t dead, but they might as well be. They were left in a perpetual vegetative state. Unwilling to admit what they’d done, they paid off the families and swept the incident under the rug.

“Which just left you. You were awake and aware, but the procedure had left you with what we thought to be irreparable damage to your limbic system, the part of your brain that controls emotions. And with the potential for people to ask too many questions, you were groomed into telling your family that you were going to work full time for the Institute. To avoid any employees asking too many questions, you were given to Mark for observation. Really, you were just a toy that he broke and still got to keep. Over the years, your condition improved but you never regained any resemblance of your old self. Until now.”

Sarah sat through the whole story without making a sound. There were a lot of details missing because there was a lot that Donna didn’t know, but her story helped clear some of the fog in Sarah’s memories, bringing more details to light.

“Why didn’t you tell me this sooner?”

“I honestly didn’t know if it would make a difference. In all of my years as a therapist, I’ve never heard of anyone with a condition like yours making a full recovery. This information could have sent you into a catatonic state, or worse, done nothing. I know you are angry and you have every right to be, but you are alive and yourself again, though I don’t know how. I know you want to hold everyone accountable, and that’s only fair, but the issue now is making sure that you stay you and don’t revert back to Apple. When the time comes, and you wish justice upon me, I won’t put up a fight for playing my part in what happened to you.”

Kylie pulled herself off of Donna’s breast with an audible pop. Lucy and her had all but disappeared during the story, not making a sound. Kylie sat up and looked Sarah straight in the eye. Donna got up and went to the bathroom.

“I will help you.”

Sarah looked at her completely confused. “What?”

“I will help you.”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“You are angry, you are hurting, and you want revenge. I understand that. I can’t say that I know exactly what you are feeling, but I was in those pods too. I know what they did to us.

“You look at Donna as if she is to blame, and partly, she is. But she is just a piece of the puzzle. A cog in the machine. Taking out your vengeance on her won’t solve anything. But I have a means to an end and I will help you.”

“He needs to pay for what he’s done.”

“And he will. Moira too, in time.”

“So you want me to spare Donna? Because she’s like a mother to you or something?”

“I want you to focus on what’s important, truly important. Will taking your revenge out on Donna bring you peace?”

“No. Probably not.”

“And how many others do you think are out there like Lucy and me? Stuck being a baby because someone thought all of this was a good idea?”

“I...I don’t know.”

“You are in a prime position to change things. No one but us knows that you are awake.”

“I can’t just sit back and keep letting him hurt me.”

“No. You can’t. And you shouldn’t have to.” Kylie said. “I’ll make you a deal. I’ll keep his attention while you work out what you want to do.”

“You don’t want his attention, Kylie. Not like that.”

“I can take some inappropriate touching. It’ll keep his attention off of you. And give you the chance to make things right.”

“I can’t let you do that. It’s not right. And even if I did, what do you want in return?”

“Spare Donna.”

“Why?”

“Because she’s a good person who did her best given the situation and she’s been working like crazy to redeem herself. And I need her.”

“For what?”

“To change me, because I’m not allowed to touch my diaper!” Kylie said, with a laugh. Sarah looked down and she could easily see that Kylie was soaked. There was more than Kylie was letting on, but she went mum on the subject. Donna came out of the bathroom and Kylie returned to her little state.

“Where do we go from here, Sarah?” Donna asked, sitting back down. Kylie moved to the floor to play with her toys and Lucy crawled up into Donna's lap for her feeding.

“I-I don’t know. I have a lot of things to think about right now.” Sarah looked down at Kylie who was mindlessly rolling on the floor, her legs in the air. “It looks like Kylie really needs to be changed though.”

“If you are up to it, you can change her.”

“Come, Kylie, let’s go change your diaper.” Kylie flipped back over and crawled after Sarah. They went downstairs and Kylie crawled up into her crib. The switch flipped, and adult Kylie was back.

“Do we have a deal?”

“There’s no way I can let you take my abuse.” Sarah said frankly.

“And if he finds out that you have your memories back? What then?”

“I can handle it.”

“You need to stop thinking that you are the only one involved in this.”

“I know. But I need to do this on my terms.”

“Fine. Have it your way. But I can tell you that you have far less chance of success by yourself than with help.”

“I can take care of myself, Kylie. I don’t need you sticking your neck out for me.”

“Says the girl that sleeps in a cage under the bed.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that you need to even the odds and I can help you even the odds.”

Sarah finished changing Kylie and Kylie slid off the crib and stood up. She was Sarah’s height, and they had a similar slender build. While adult Kylie looked a bit ridiculous standing there having a serious conversation while in a diaper, Sarah had respect for her. Kylie was more than she initially appeared and smarter than she led on. Sarah had to put her emotions aside to understand that Kylie was right. Mark was taller, heavier, and fit. There was no way that Sarah could overpower him. Kylie was abstractly referring to the case in Donna’s room. A case that Sarah had no access to. A case and a chemical that could easily turn the tide.

Kylie was offering liberation for the price of turning the other cheek for one person. Sarah watched her crawl back up the stairs. She felt exhausted and wanted to lie down, but he was going to be home soon and she had to get dinner started. She had to put the real her away and bring back the facade. She needed to be Apple for a little while longer to get her plan in order. She would find time to talk to Kylie more, but Kylie was right, she would need the help.

Part Eleven: Honesty

Atop her metaphorical ivory tower, Moira Vale felt as if her grasp on her company was slipping. The reports and camera footage from Mark’s place didn’t lend any comfort. Kylie and Lucy’s progress was going forward, but there was something happening there that made her uneasy. Yet another girl had been introduced, spending time with Kylie sporadically. Mark had spent very little time with the girls, though now it seemed that he was finally letting his influence be felt. She didn’t know if Donna had finally relaxed and began to trust him, but she was letting him spend time with the girls, just not alone.

Moira knew of Mark’s proclivities. Every time since the first time, she kept tabs on Mark. The Sarah Walker incident had almost destroyed her fledgling company and in being the controlling person that she was, she spied on Mark ever since. She always let him toe a line that others would find too far. One, for information. Should she need to use any of the procured information against him, the more she had the better she felt. Two, for control. Above anything else, Moira craved control and her influence had to be felt everywhere.

She was too big to fail, or so she felt, and her narcissism was her biggest flaw. She was unable to let go of her pride and she knew that it was going to be her downfall. She refused to admit it and dwelled on the fallout when it all fell apart. Copious amounts of alcohol numbed her thoughts on it and as she stood in her floor to ceiling office windows, staring out at the city, she couldn’t help but smirk at the arrogance. Here she was, CEO of the Institute, looking out on the city as if she owned it, knowing full well that there were taller buildings, more widespread and powerful companies, and far wealthier CEO’s doing the exact same thing. She was a small fish in the big pond, even if her influence and clout reached from coast to coast and up to high ranking government officials. Everyone had their dirty little secrets and would pay handsomely to have her fix their embarrassing children. Her first major contract was the governor’s daughter.

The contract went well and the Institute quickly gained a reputation of discretion and efficiency.

Their successes led her to have an inflated ego about her abilities.

The cracks were showing. There was something about Kylie that seemed to poison everyone she came in contact with against the Institute. Moira couldn’t figure out what it was, but it was past the point of irritating. If she could just keep her shit together, Kylie would be out of her hair and things could go back to normal. Patience. It’s what got her to this point and it’s what would get her through. The Institute had dealt with troubled people before and perseverance had gotten them through. Her empire would not be taken down by a bedwetting brat with a penchant for diapers!

Three weeks had passed since Leah saw Kylie. In those three weeks, Leah had done the research that Donna suggested, namely looking into the term paraphilic infantilism. While more lovingly referred to as being an AB, adult baby, or DL, diaper lover, the terms were generally combined into ABDL. Within that “rare” paraphilia were numerous subsets, generally leaning towards their interactions with others, notably the DDLG, daddy dominant-little girl dynamic and the DMLB, dominant mommy-little boy. There were a plethora of other types but those two were the ones Leah was the most interested in. There were, of course, the same sex varieties, but they were all based off of these two archetypes. The more she dug into it, the more she came to understand why Donna had her do the research. There were so many facets to this kink that Leah hadn’t really thought about, but in the interests of Kylie, Leah began to understand exactly where she stood. Kylie wanted her to be a Big, that is, the adult in the friendship, while Kylie was the Little, the child. The Big would take care of the Little, providing them with everything they needed from companionship, to rules, to structure so that the Little could let themselves go, and be emotionally free. What Kylie got out of it was harder to grasp, and Leah spent some time in various forums asking strangers what they liked about it. She talked to everyone who bothered to reply, which was far more than she had thought, and found that her inner prejudice towards all of it to be nonsensical. There were a lot of confusing statements in her research, with nay sayers saying that it was one step away from pedophilia. She found that they couldn’t be any farther from the truth. The community at large remained very outspoken against minors or children of any sort partaking in their kink, stating that every single one of them were consenting adults and as soon as a minor identifies themselves, they are banned from social circle. Leah didn’t want to dive too far into that argument, as there was no end to it, but she believed them. Being an ABDL, some said, was about trust and control. The Little gives trust and control to the Big and in return, gets unwavering love and acceptance while being a safe environment in which they can be their true selves. Communication between the two is paramount and any breakdown in that or the trust ends the relationship. Some things can be worked out, but in general, it’s difficult to go back once the trust is broken.

When it came to why people want to “play” in this way, the answers were both wildly different and yet equally understandable. Leah was amazed at how many people there were like Kylie and even more amazed at how quickly they were willing to talk about it. It made them happy and didn’t hurt anyone like other kinks could, but since it dealt with childlike behaviors and dress, it was shunned by most of the kink community for “being too close to the line.” There were a lot of similar statements about having their childhood robbed from them; there were some about letting all of their adult problems fade; there were many about how they enjoyed the shift in power dynamic. It didn’t matter their reason, they simply wanted to surrender to their Bigs, if they could find one.

Bigs, on the other hand, loved the nurturing aspect of taking care of someone in such an intimate way. While it did seem silly to some, taking care of an adult who wants to be a baby, the bond that a Big had with their Little was unlike anything else. More than a friendship, it was a bond of love, born out of a trust unlike anything else. Others got off on the power aspect of it, and that was fine, but they knew enough that although they made the rules and enforced them, they weren’t in charge. The Little controlled the ebb and flow of a session, behaving one way or another depending on their mood.

Every Little wanted a Big, but not all Bigs were good for their Littles. The line there was perhaps the most talked about part of Leah’s research. She read many a tale of Bigs that took things just a Little too far or didn’t measure up. Keeping the session or play time separate from the rest of the Little’s life was the hardest part. The Little decided when it was time to play, with some flexibility based on behavior and a few Bigs wanted more control than they needed. The takeaway from all of her research was that if Kylie wanted Leah to be her Big, Mommy, or otherwise, she should take it as an honor and spend time with Kylie figuring out exactly what she wanted. Great communication would be the key to whether or not Leah was a good fit and if not, there were plenty of lonely Littles out there just looking for a Mommy.

Leah was flattered by their offers, and politely told them that she had a lot to learn before she declared herself anyone’s Mommy. She filled Donna in on all that transpired and Donna praised her for being so thorough. She applauded the effort that Leah put in and brought her up to speed on how Kylie was doing.

In the three weeks that Leah had spent away from Kylie, things had drastically changed. Kylie had completed her regression and admission of her flaws, as well as finding her voice and securing her character. Her final hurdle was confronting a father figure and getting her feelings out about how her father abandoned her. She needed to find peace in the fact that she wasn’t to blame for him leaving and accepting that his absence had something to do with her emotional issues. To do so, she had to spend time with Mark. Donna started her off slowly, and Mark played his role as expected. So far, he was kind and caring, leaving his other proclivities behind and doing his job. Kylie had been moved out of diapers and into pull ups and was adjusting well to the new set of rules that Mark had.

The rules were heavily scrutinized by Donna and all of their interactions were supervised off the start. She had started dialing back her paranoia to let Mark and Kylie interact without so much interference. They were good together, to a degree. Mark played Daddy pretty well and Kylie was receptive to his care. There was still an estrangement between them that Donna wasn't sure would ever go away and Donna began to suspect that Kylie was just going through the motions. She would have to wait for Mark’s evaluation on Kylie before she made any decisions about altering Kylie’s care. Donna was proud of Kylie’s progress and decided that when Leah was ready, they could spend time together again.

“Kylie? Are you dressed yet?” Donna called from the top of the basement stairs.

“Mostly!” Kylie responded, tripping on her leggings and falling on her butt.

Donna heard the thump and descended the stairs to see what was going on. Kylie had plopped onto the floor, her leggings bundled up around her knees.

“Do you need help?” Donna asked.

“I a big girl. I do it.” Kylie responded. She had been working on finding a middle ground between her baby talk and what she was truly capable.

“Okay. Do it yourself. I need to pack your diaper bag anyway.”

“No diapies! I big girl!”

“I’m putting a change of clothes and some extra pull ups and wipes in there just in case you have an accident.”

“No diapies?”

“One diaper.”

“No diapies!”

“One or you don’t go.”

Kylie whined out a pout but relented. “Otay. One diapie.”

“Would you like a sippy cup to take with you?”

“Grape?!”

“Of course. Grape juice it is. And do you remember the rules?”

“I be a good girl.”

“I’m sure you will be, but do you remember the rules?”

“Uh huh.”

“What are they?”

“Be a good girl. Say pwease and fank you. Big person knows best.”

“And?”

“No accidents. Stay dry. Ask for potty.”

“Very good. And what happens if you are a bad girl?”

“I no bad girl. I good girl.”

“Kylie. Answer me.” Donna's tone shifted to more stern and authoritative.

“Big person decides. And then Mommy or Daddy decides.”

“Good. And are you ready for this?”

“I think so. I really like Leah. She’s a good friend. I just hope that she can understand and accept this new me.”

“I’m fairly confident that she understands you.”

“Do you really think so?” Kylie asked hopefully, pulling her leggings up over her pull up. The leggings were tight enough that an outline of the pull up could be seen, but they didn’t grab attention.

“I do. But you need to be sure of what you really want. I don’t think she can be a Mommy for you, not like I do.”

“There is no one like you, Mommy. And I’m not looking to replace you. I know that my time here is nearing its end. I have to find acceptance outside of these walls and the Institute if I’m going to maintain my care.”

“Do you feel that your care needs to continue outside of the Institute?”

“Not necessarily. I don’t know if care is the right word. This is a part of me.” Kylie said, running her hands down her butt and patting it. “I like it this way. I like being little. I like having someone take care of me. It helps me feel strong when I have control over my life. I’ve spent so many years under the demand and control of my mother that I never felt like I had any choice in the direction of my life. But now, I have that choice. I can choose who I allow to enjoy this part of me and that’s not something that my mother or anyone else can take away.”

“I sense that there are a lot of unresolved issues between you and her.”

“I guess. I try not to think about it too much. I want to enjoy myself while I’m in your care.”

“I appreciate that. I really do. You’ve been one of the best babies that I’ve ever had the pleasure of helping.”

“Awww. Mommy wuvs me!” Kylie exclaimed, running into Donna’s arms.

“That I do, sweety, that I do. And you know that I only want what’s best for you.”

“I know. I’m still trying to figure this all out.”

“Don’t feel like you have to rush. I don’t know if I’m ready to say goodbye just yet.”

“It’s only for the day, Mommy. A few hours is all.”

“A few hours is too long to be without my baby.”

“You have Lucy. She’s more your baby than I am.”

“That’s a conversation for another time.” Donna said, letting go of Kylie and putting a few final things in the diaper bag. Kylie slung it over her shoulder, looking more adult than she had in months.

“You sound like you have a lot of thoughts about it.”

Donna held a pacifier to Kylie’s lips, ending the conversation with a look. She wasn’t ready to talk about it, much less be grilled about it by one of her clients. She had to maintain focus on the bigger picture. Leah was due to arrive at any moment and Kylie needed to be in the right headspace. She took Kylie by the hand and led her upstairs where Kylie went to stand in the window, looking out for Leah’s car. Donna went into the kitchen to fill up a sippy cup of juice for Kylie. She eyed the young girl standing in the window and knew immediately when

Leah had arrived. Kylie started fidgeting and bouncing in excitement. She rushed to the door as Leah walked up the sidewalk and threw it open, running out into the yard to wrap her arms around her friend.

She couldn’t hear the words but could tell from the pitch that Kylie was practically gushing over Leah as they walked back into the house. Kylie was talking a mile a minute, so fast and so rushed that it came out like babble. Leah was trying to keep up with her, answering questions as fast as she could but it got to the point where she didn’t know what to answer first. She was getting flustered but instead of lashing out, she remembered her role and asserted herself, pushing the pacifier Kylie had dropped back into Kylie’s mouth.

“Take a minute to collect yourself, Kylie. I’ll happily answer all of your questions in an orderly fashion, but I can’t if you won’t let me speak.” Kylie was still trying to talk around the pacifier but Leah stood her ground, holding two fingers on it, keeping it tight to Kylie’s lips.

“Ahhh! What did I just say?”

Kylie paused, debating on whether or not to continue pushing Leah. Her eyes darted over to Donna, who was standing at the threshold of the kitchen and living room, holding the sippy cup. Kylie took a deep breath and let it out slowly, calming down.

“Good girl.” Leah said, dropping her hand. “I’m happy that you are so excited and I’m excited too, but let’s not get out of hand.” Kylie nodded and Leah added, “Are you all packed and ready to go?”

Kylie nodded again.

“Got a change of clothes in case you have an accident?” Kylie blushed and nodded.

“Donna told me you are wearing pull ups. Is that true?” Kylie nodded again, happier this time.

“Drop your pants and show me.” Leah said, causing Kylie to freeze. Leah sounded authoritative and confident but she was shaking inside from her nerves. Kylie hesitated before sliding her leggings down to her knees and showing Leah her princess pull ups.

“Good.” Leah said, checking to make sure Kylie was still dry. “Is there anything else you packed that I need to know about?” Donna had already filled Leah in on what was in the backpack slung over Kylie’s back.

Behind her pacifier, Kylie garbled something about her sippy cup. She was skirting around the issue. Leah gave her the most stern look she could muster and after a second or two, Kylie caved.

“A diapie.”

“A diaper? I see. Well, let’s hope that we don’t have to use it.” She pulled Kylie’s leggings up and gave her a pat on the bottom. “I need to talk to Donna for a moment, so go wait by the door.”

Kylie sauntered off, feeling on top of the world. Leah had come in with a surprising amount of confidence and behaved in all the right ways. Kylie was feeling rather loved and little at the moment while she awaited Leah to take her out for the day.

“How’d I do?” Leah asked Donna.

“Phenomenal. You handled yourself very well, asserting yourself when you needed to, and reminding her of her place. I’m sure that she’s overjoyed right now.” Donna replied.

“Anything I should change?”

“That’s not for me to say. You need to find your own path as to what works between you and her. But I would say that you are on the right course. She wants you to lead and keep her in check. Expect her to test you and push your boundaries to see what she can get away with. It’s normal. Also, don’t be afraid to stand your ground or discipline in a public place. She needs to understand that your rules apply wherever you are.”

“Understood. And the diaper?”

“Just in case you feel she’s gotten too out of hand. I’d only use it if she pushes you too far or you feel like she needs to start over.”

“Start over?”

“It’s part of her rules. If she gets put back in diapers, all progress she’s made towards the end of her time here gets erased. She doesn’t go back to full regression, but to the beginning of this last segment.”

“So don’t use it unless needed. Gotcha.”

“I wouldn’t say that either. It’s a tool for you should you need it, nothing more. If you feel like she needs to be in it, for any reason, that’s your call to make. I’m sure you would let me know why you felt that it was necessary. Or maybe you wanted to have her in it for fun, who knows. The point is that it’s at your disposal should you choose to use it.”

“Okay.”

“One last thing. Do you need any money?”

“No. I think I’m fine.”

“Okay. Take this just in case.” Donna said, pulling a card out of her pocket. “This has five hundred on it. Use it how you see fit.”

Leah looked at the card. It had her name on it and a strange box style symbol. “What’s this?” She asked of the symbol.

“The Institute pays handsomely,” was all that Donna said. “It’s best not to keep her waiting too long.”

Leah took the sippy cup and slid the card into her purse. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Donna smiled. “You’ve got this. Your hesitation shows how much you care. She will appreciate that.”

“I hope so. I don’t want to let her down.”

“You won’t. Don’t hesitate to talk to her about what she’s looking for in all of this. Keep that communication as open and honest as possible.”

“I will.”

Leah left Donna in the hallway and she had to check on Lucy. Kylie was impatiently pacing by the door, looking agitated, sucking on her pacifier. Leah took the opportunity to remind her of her place,

“Do you need to use the potty before we leave?” Kylie shook her head hastily. “Well, I don’t want any accidents in my car so how about we go sit you on the potty for a few minutes to make sure before we leave?”

Kylie pouted and slowly stomped her feet towards the bathroom and stood in front of the toilet with her hands crossed across her chest. Leah pulled her leggings and pull up down to her knees and Kylie thumped down on the toilet seat. She pulled the pacifier from her lips and mockingly exclaimed, “See? I don’t has to go!”

Leah looked at her for a moment and pulled the wipes out of the backpack. She opened them and pulled one out just as Kylie hung her head and tinkled.

“Didn’t have to go, huh? If we had been on the road, I would have had to pull over. And judging by how much you’re going, you would have needed a change of clothes. Maybe I should pack some extra diapers just in case.”

“No! I’ma big girl!”

“Well then, my little padded princess, you should not be so hesitant to use the big girl potty. Stand up so that I can wipe you and we will be on our way.”

Kylie stood with her legs slightly apart and let Leah wipe her clean. Leah pulled the pull up back over Kylie’s bottom and the leggings followed shortly after. Leah washed her hands while Kylie flushed and they headed for the door. When they passed the living room, they saw Lucy in Donna’s lap being breastfed. Kylie waved to Mommy and they headed out the door to Leah’s car. Within moments they were on the road and Leah breathed a sigh of relief.

“Everything okay, Leah?”

Leah glanced at Kylie but kept her eyes on the road. “Yeah. Everything is fine.”

“You did very well. Better than the first time, so don’t be so hard on yourself.”

“Thanks. I appreciate it.” Leah was unsure by what metric Kylie was judging her but her words of encouragement were nice to hear.

“Not as much as I do, that’s for sure.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means that this is really important to me. You being here and being a part of this is important to me and I want to make sure that you are comfortable. If I push too far or too hard, you need to let me know, because I don’t want to push you away.”

“Why me?”

“Because I trust you. You took care of me before I even knew what I needed. Back in college I was struggling to figure out how to get a handle on my bedwetting and you happened to have the perfect solution. You didn’t make fun of me or out me to your friends and that means a lot.”

“I’m pretty sure I wet the bed more times than you did that semester.”

“You were drunk. I wasn’t. There is a big difference there. And it’s not really about the bedwetting. That was the catalyst, but it was really your blind support. We hadn’t really talked much or hung out during that time and yet you still took time out of your life to help me.

“And that was just the beginning. When you ran into me three weeks ago, you had no idea what I was going through, or what was going on, and yet you kept an open mind, spent the day in my world, and gave your best attempt to understand. Do you know how rare that is?

Given the type of world I’m into? I mean, how could I not see you as the greatest person ever?”

“I’m not the greatest person ever. Not by a long shot.”

“Perhaps not. But you are someone that I look up to, and I truly mean that.”

“I appreciate that, Kylie. I really do. I try to keep an open mind as best I can.”

“An open mind to the point where you did research to be a better caregiver.”

“I-I wanted to understand what you were looking for so that I could try to give that to you.”

“Not try. Succeed. And in ways that Donna hasn’t.”

“I don’t think I did anything special. But I will keep that in mind.”

“Well, just know that making me sit on the potty was both humiliating and exhilarating, and I loved it!”

“I’m glad.”

“So don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re doing great.”

“”I don’t know that I’m really hard on myself so much as nervous. I’ve never done something like this before. As an only child, I don’t really know how to care for a little sister.”

Kylie blushed. “You think of me as your little sister?”

“A bratty little sister who still needs to be potty trained!”

“I’ma good girl! I went on the potty!”

“I had to push you to it! Which reminds me, are you wet?”

“Nu uh.”

Leah reached over and pushed her hand between Kylie’s legs, making Kylie squirm as Leah cupped the material, giving it a small squeeze. “Not wet yet, but you can expect more checks like this today, am I understood?”

“Yes, Miss Leah.” Kylie said, all of her adult persona driven away with one action. She spread her legs a little to give Leah more access.

“That’s a good girl. If you are a good girl all day then big sister will buy you an ice cream.

Would you like an ice cream?”

“Yes, big sister.”

“Well, we shall see.” She pulled her hand back and pushed the sippy cup Kylie was holding up to her lips. “Sister needs to drive now.”

Kylie happily sipped the juice while Leah compartmentalized. It was hard for her to keep everything straight and she couldn’t imagine how Kylie managed to do it. What made it worse were the feelings she had as Kylie leaned over, resting her head on Leah’s shoulder, drinking from the sippy cup. She didn’t know if she was feeling maternal or sisterly or authoritative. Kylie responded positively either way which was great for Leah’s confidence but her hesitations were still there. She didn’t want to fail because she knew it would hurt Kylie more than she was willing to risk.

She pushed her thoughts away, deciding that dwelling on it would take her attention too far from Kylie. She wondered what else she could do that Kylie would respond to. She had some ideas, like public checks, use of the pacifier, and a few other things, but she really wanted something that would cement her place as Kylie’s caregiver. She would see how the day progressed and hoped that something would come to her.

She pulled the car into the mall parking lot and brought it to a stop. Kylie sat up, a little bit of juice running down the corner of her mouth. Leah used her thumb to wipe Kylie’s lip. After drying her thumb on her pants, she reached back up and grabbed Kylie by the chin with her thumb and forefinger. She turned Kylie’s face to look directly into her eyes. She could feel a little bit of hesitation in Kylie’s movements and what seemed like a tremor. She tightened her grip slightly and Kylie shuddered for a moment before flushing red. Leah looked right into Kylie’s eyes, a question written across her face and Kylie’s eyes held the lock for a moment before darting down. Leah took the gesture as an unspoken answer.

“And this is why you are the baby sister.” She said coldly, letting go of Kylie’s chin. She gathered her purse, tossing her keys into it, and opened the car door. She walked around the car to the other side, feeling Kylie’s eyes on her at every step. She opened the passenger door and reached across Kylie’s lap to undo the seatbelt. She helped Kylie get out of the car, handed her the backpack, and took her by the hand.

“I guess shopping will have to wait. Someone needs to be changed, doesn’t she?” Leah asked, leading Kylie to the front doors. “Doesn’t she?” She asked again.

“...y-yes.” Kylie stammered, her mind blown that someone had happened across her secret trigger. The experimenting with Lucy had shown her that she could be aroused by rubbing her diaper on something held between her legs, but Kylie knew that there was something more to it. She had slowly tried various things but knew that what she really needed was for someone to take control and put her on the spot. Much like her when her mother confronted her, being put on the defensive and reminded of her baby-like behavior was enough to make her pee a little. The humiliation of being treated like that and her nervous bladder was the ultimate trigger for her to fall deep into little space. Being led around and having to hold her caregiver’s hand exacerbated her feelings. She was a little weak in the knees and totally smitten with Leah, not romantically, but something close.

Leah led her inside and directly to the bathrooms. She chose the family bathroom for the added humiliation. There was a mother with a small child at the sink and the little girl watched Kylie being led into a stall. She kept rubbing the soap over her hands as she watched under the stall as Kylie slid off her shoes and had her pants pulled down to her ankles. The little girl saw the pull up and excitedly pulled on her mom’s shirt, pointing at the bundle of clothes. The mother tried to pull her daughter’s attention away but got stuck herself watching the display from under the door. They saw one of the girls, they assumed the one that had been led into the stall, stepped out of the leggings and a pair of hands unzipped the backpack they had brought with them. After some rummaging, one of the girls cursed under her breath.

“We forgot the wipes! And there is no powder in here either!” The other girl whimpered a small whine. “You let me worry about it, you just sit on the potty.” The pair of hands returned and pulled the wet pull up out of the discarded pants. A moment passed and the door slowly opened and one of the girls emerged.

“Toddlers, am I right?” Leah asked out loud, prompting another whimper from the stall. “And I didn’t bring any wipes with me. I couldn’t trouble you for some, could I?” There was another whimper as Leah balled up the wet pull up and tossed it into the garbage can.

The mother looked at Leah for a moment, debating on how she should respond. The little girl however, quickly pulled out the resealable package and handed it to Leah.

“Why thank you sweetie! I appreciate it! I’ll be right back.” Leah disappeared back into the stall and the toilet flushed. There was a bit of a shuffle and some whispering before the strangers saw a clean pull up being pulled from the bag, unfolded, and held so that the unknown girl could step into them. They were pulled up out of sight and the pants followed quickly after.

Leah emerged from the stall and handed the package of wipes back to the little girl. “Thanks again! You’re a lifesaver.”

She washed her hands and waited for a few moments before speaking to the girl left in the stall. “Come on Kylie, you need to wash your hands. Don’t make me have to collect you!”

There was a momentary pause and they heard the lock slide open on the stall door. It slowly opened and Kylie appeared from behind the slate gray wall. She hung her head and averted her eyes as she baby-stepped her way to the sink. The mother and her child watched her intently as walked. They were clearly looking for an explanation as to why this young adult was wearing a pull up.

The mother finally found her manners and refocused her daughter’s attention on washing their hands. Kylie’s face was beet red and she had never been more embarrassed in her life, and that wasn’t an easy claim to make. The mother and small child finished washing and drying their hands and headed for the door. Leah and Kylie could see that the younger girl didn’t understand what was going on and on the way out of the door, the small child blurted out,

“Why is she wearing a pull up, Mommy?!”

Kylie flushed an even brighter red and if she could have peed, she would have. Leah, thankfully, handled it like a professional, kneeling in front of the little girl. “Well, sweetie, my little sister isn’t quite the big girl she tries to be and sometimes she has accidents. She wears pull ups so that she doesn’t get her clothes dirty and her Mommy lets me take care of her sometimes.”

“Is she sick?”

“Angela! Don’t be rude!”

“No, honey. She’s not sick. She’s perfectly fine.”

“Come, Angela, we shouldn’t bother these girls anymore.”

“But Mom!”

“Listen to your mother, Angela. Always listen to your mother.” Leah said, standing up. Angela and her mother disappeared out of the bathroom and Leah retrieved the back pack, zipping it closed. Kylie was standing nearby, fidgeting.

“Let’s go, Kylie.” Leah said, taking her by the hand. Kylie resisted, standing firm. “Are you okay?” Leah asked.

“Hmmph!” Kylie said, pouting.

“Hmmph? Let me guess. You don’t like what just happened.” Leah said. “You and I both know that there are wipes in this bag. You think all of this was just a stunt to embarrass you in front of strangers, right?” Kylie nodded and stared at the floor. Leah stood in front of her and with one finger, pushed up on Kylie’s chin, turning her gaze upwards. “Did I go too far?”

Kylie was frozen in place, unable to respond with words. She took a moment to think about it and slowly shook her head.

“Do you want to go home?” Kylie shook her head again.

“Are you a baby who needs her pull ups?” Kylie blushed and nodded slowly.

“And who’s baby are you?”

Kylie looked into Leah’s eyes. “Yours?”

Leah leaned forward and kissed her forehead. “And don’t you forget it! Now, carry your diaper bag and let’s go shopping!” Leah exclaimed, grabbing Kylie by the hand. They gleefully marched out into the mall, a confident Leah and an ecstatic Kylie.

The afternoon passed with little instance. Leah was true to her word and it seemed like every time they weren’t being watched, she was checking to see if Kylie had wet herself. Kylie was loving the attention. She had found that even being in diapers 24/7 hadn’t been enough to keep her in little space but with Leah, it was like there was nothing but little space. That’s how it felt to her, anyway. Leah was quick to pat her butt or usher her into the corner of a store for a few minutes of paci time. She always felt that the attention was on her, even when Leah was clearly focused on something else. As they went from store to store, Leah seemed to find something that made Kylie feel little, a shirt a size too small, cute socks with cartoon characters on it, and childish cotton panties. Leah would comment that Kylie wasn’t ready for such big girl clothes, Kylie would blush and squirm, and the cycle would repeat.

Leah bought some outfits, a small teddy bear, and a few small toys. It was here that there was a disconnect. Even with all that Leah had done and was doing, there was still the glaring issue of Kylie being an adult. While the child’s toys were fun, they didn’t really fit with Kylie’s capacity. While she could separate her mind on most things, she couldn’t let years of education be ignored.

How does one be a baby or child with the mind of an adult? How can I separate who and what I am? Is this really me? Or is this just the mask I wear to protect my feelings? Leah’s been so good to me. Mommy Donna too, but is this all that there is? Do I play these games even if I don’t fully believe in them? Or is there something more that I don’t understand?

A quick slap to the butt brought her out of her thoughts. “Don’t be so hard on yourself.” Leah said as if she knew what Kylie had been thinking. “You’re making a serious face, do you need to potty?”

Kylie shook her head, still following her thoughts. There was something she wasn’t seeing and it was bugging her. Something earth shaking and drastic. She felt as if it had been in the back of her mind all this time, lurking in the shadows, waiting to be brought forth.

“Kylie? Are you okay?” Leah asked, pulling her over to the side so people could walk by. “I...I don’t know.”

“What’s wrong?”

“I...I just...this doesn’t feel right anymore.”

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No. Of course not. It’s just that, I don’t know, something is different. Something has changed and I’m struggling to understand it.”

“Okay. Well, I’m here to help with anything you need so let’s go to the food court, get something to eat, and talk about it.”

“Okay…” Kylie said after a pause. She felt wrong and out of place. She walked next to Leah but didn’t hold her hand. The backpack on her back felt awkward and heavy, like a weight on her shoulders. They ordered smoothies and sat down amidst the sea of other people and Kylie felt isolated and alone. No one could understand how she felt. She didn’t even understand it, but she knew that her feelings culminated into eight words.

Kylie looked at Leah with a heavy heart and a sad expression. While she had found happiness in the efforts Leah had put forth, the gravity of her feelings were more than her soul could bear. She sighed a mournful whimper and felt the burning of the tears starting to form.

“I don’t want to be a baby anymore.”

Part Twelve: Acceptance

“I don’t want to be a baby anymore.”

The words blocked out all other sounds and dulled the senses. Leah had just gotten comfortable in her role as a caregiver and her charge had just decided that she didn’t want to be a part of it anymore. It was an insult that hurt her heart. She tried not to take it personally.

Kylie hung her head, letting the tears fall down her face. She didn’t know what her words really meant but she knew them to be the truth. The implication shocked her to the core. Her admission went against everything her mind had created to protect her.

Without the shield of being a little, what did I have left?

Kylie looked at Leah, wanting some spark of hope to be on her friend’s face. She only saw pain. It confused her at first, but when she thought about it, she understood how much she had hurt her friend.

“Leah. Can you take me home? Not to Donna, but to my house? I have something I need to do.”

“Yeah. Sure.” Leah said, her voice low and depressed.

They left the mall and Leah drove. Kylie couldn’t look at her without feeling ashamed.

She hadn’t bothered to give Leah any directions but somehow she knew where she was going. The neighborhoods started to get familiar and before long, Leah pulled into the driveway of Kylie’s mother.

Kylie looked at the house as if it were something from a distant memory. She didn’t know what she was going to say but felt the compulsion to say something. She trembled in the seat, wetting her pull up. Her mother would always have this effect on her and she hated it.

“Are you okay?” Leah asked. She was looking at Kylie and could see that she was perturbed.

“Yeah. I’m just trying to get my bearings.”

“Did you want me to go up and ring the bell?” Leah joked.

“I could use your support, yeah. I don’t know what it is about her, but I always get this way. It’s like my spine turns to jelly. She makes me feel like I can never do anything right or good enough. She makes me feel little without even trying. I mean, I just peed sitting here thinking about it.”

“Bad?”

“I can’t tell.” Her voice was starting to waver. The longer she stared at the front door, the more uneasy she felt. “I...I don’t know if this is a good idea.”

“Do you want to stay a baby then?”

“No. I don’t want to feel this way either.”

“Do you think this is going to help?”

“I hope so. It can’t hurt, I don’t think, anyway. And it’s long overdue.” Kylie said. “I at least need to speak my mind so that I can get some kind of closure.”

“Okay. Well, whatever you need.” Leah said dismissively.

Kylie picked up on the tone immediately. “You’re mad at me aren’t you?”

“I’m not mad.”

“You sound mad.”

“I’m not mad. I’m hurt.” Leah said. “I tried really hard to give you exactly what you wanted and it blew up in my face.”

“This isn’t about you. You’ve been great! This is about me figuring out what I truly want in life and being happy with myself.”

“I don’t make you happy?”

“You do, and it hurts my heart that you feel this way. I didn’t mean to hurt you and I’m sorry that I did. My timing is terrible and you can spank me for it later. But right now, I need to get some things off my chest and I would really like you to be there in case I can’t go through with it.”

“I’ll hold you to that, you know.”

Kylie smiled. “You’d better. I didn’t ask to use the potty and I made you upset at me.”

Leah laughed, trying to cover the hurt with joviality. “Are you ready to do this?”

“I hope so.” Kylie opened the car door and got out, wiggling a little from side to side to adjust the wet pull up. “Talking to my mom with pee in my pants. What fun this is!”

“I could change you real quick. I think you have another pull up in the bag. If not, there is always the diaper.”

“The whole point of being here is to figure out if I really need to be in diapers or if I just like them and want to stay in them.”

“I thought you didn’t want to be a baby anymore.”

“I don’t want to be a baby in the sense that Donna would think. I want to be my own independent person.”

“It sounds like you already are.”

“-that also wears diapers for fun or pleasure.”

Leah paused. “Oh.” She thought about the implications of what Kylie was saying. “I’m to assume then that what you want from your mother is acceptance of the new status quo?”

“I want her to love me for me, no matter what. Like you do.”

“I-I see. And if she doesn’t?”

“Then I don’t know what I’m going to do. But I will deal with it one step at a time.” “Atta girl.”

“Then let’s get this over with.”

They walked up the driveway to the front door. They paused as Kylie steeled herself for what was to come. She reached for the door handle and was surprised when it swung open on its own.

“Hello. Can I help you?”

Kylie was flabbergasted at what she saw. The girl (boy?) that stood in the doorway was dressed in a white and black maid outfit. Not quite the French style but heavily inspired by it.

There was a pink collar around her (his?) neck and black tights that went up past the kneecaps.

“I’m...uh...here to see my mother.” Kylie stammered, still taken back by the strange person in her mother’s house.

The person curtsied and stepped back, inviting them in. “I’ll let her know that you have arrived,” they said, disappearing down the hall, their heeled shoes clicking on the floor as they walked.

The first chance she got, Leah burst out in a fit of giggles, unable to contain herself.

“I don’t know either, but don’t be rude.” Kylie said. She led Leah to the living room, memories flashing before her eyes. She could still picture the shopping bag of pull ups that her mother showed her. She remembered how she threw a fit and wet her pants in front of her mother. She looked towards her room and the bathroom door that was a little ways away and remembered the first time her mother put her in a diaper. And the mouth soaping incident that led to her soiling herself. It all seemed like ancient history, and yet, the wounds were still fresh.

“She will be with you shortly.” The effeminate voice said, and they turned to see the strange person curtsy again before returning to the kitchen. They could see through the entryway as the person clothed as a made wiped counters down before hand washing the floor.

“Kylie? Oh my god, it’s you!” Lori burst from the hallway and wrapped her daughter up in a big hug, squeezing as tight as she could. “I’ve missed you so much! You have no idea!” “Enough to take my breath away?” Kylie wheezed.

“My goodness! Sorry! Yes, of course. Can’t be too overzealous now.” She said, letting go of Kylie. “Come. Sit! I have drinks brought. Isabell?!”

Isabell returned, bowing politely. “You called, Madam?”

“Yes. I’d like you to meet my daughter, Kylie, and her friend...what was your name, dear?”

“Leah. My name is Leah.”

“And this is Leah. Could you be a doll and bring us some refreshments?”

Isabell bowed to Kylie and Leah before excusing herself, backing out of the room.

“Umm, Mom...what is going on here?”

“Is that a guy or a girl?” Leah blurted out.

“Isabell is my cleaning service. And to answer your question, Leah, Isabell is in transition at the moment.”

“So you have a boy who is dressed as a girl, cleaning your house? Just want to make sure I understand you correctly.”

“Yes. If we must be frank about it, though it really isn’t of importance.”

“How? Why? Who is this person?”

“He was my assistant until I found his filthy porn collection and I made him a deal. He gets rid of that exploitative trash, and I help him discover who he really is.”

“A girl?”

“A lady.” Lori corrected. “Isabell expresses herself as a lady and wishes to be treated as such.”

“That’s awfully progressive of you, mother, and completely out of character.” Kylie accused.

“People change, Kylie.”

“Do they?” Kylie challenged as Isabell returned with a tray of drinks.

“Yes, Miss Kylie, they do. People can change. Your mother has changed drastically since you’ve been gone.”

“That’ll do, Isabell. I can handle this.”

“Yes, Ma’am, my apologies.” She said, setting the tray down and retreating to the kitchen. Kylie glared at her (him) as she left.

“I understand that this is an adjustment for you, Kylie, but I’m guessing that you aren’t here to see what’s changed at home. Which reminds me, if you will follow me.” Lori stood up and led Kylie and Leah to Kylie’s room. She pulled a key from her necklace, one of two, and unlocked the door. “I took the liberty of making some changes to your room. I hope they are to your liking but we could change it if you so desire.”

For the second time today, Kylie was floored. Instead of her room as she remembered it, her bed, dresser, and vanity were gone. In their place was a large baby crib, a changing table, and a small kitchenette set. In one corner was a large chest that had Kylie’s Toybox scrawled on the side. Her room, which once housed the furniture of an adult, now looked more like a nursery.

“Y-you...did this...for me…?” She stammered, her eyes darting around the room. It had a warm, inviting feel. She felt safe, cared for, and most of all, loved.

“Of course I did. I had a lot of time to think while you were gone. That’s the thing with solidarity, and my promotion, is that I had a lot of time to assess what was most important in my life. And that’s you.

“I realize that I’ve made some mistakes. I judged you too harshly without ever knowing what you were really going through. I put a lot on your shoulders that you shouldn’t have had to bear and I wasn’t supportive of you when you needed me too. That ends now. This,” Lori waved her hand at the new furniture, “is a gesture of understanding. Even if you don’t want it and I spent all of that money for nothing, I know that I at least tried my best to understand and accept you for who you are, and not who I thought you should be.”

Tears rolled down Kylie’s face as she leapt into Lori’s arms. She never felt so vindicated in her life. While she may not have wanted this, the gesture was so overwhelming that she couldn’t contain herself. All she had ever wanted was to feel validated and loved.

“I-I don’t know what to say, Mom!” Kylie sobbed.

“You don’t have to say anything. You’ve said enough and I just wasn’t listening. I know I’m old and set in my ways, but my ways shouldn’t be at the cost of my daughter.” Lori said. “I haven’t been the best mother and the last thing I wanted to do was become my mother. I needed perspective, and my work at the Institute and time with Isabell gave me that.

“I was, and in some ways, still am, a prude. I get that. What I don’t want, however, is for my ways to push you away. My children are my pride and joy and if I am to provide the best for them, I need to see past myself. You are so amazing, Kylie. You’ve really surprised me and I’m so proud of you.”

Between happy cries and large squeeze hugs, Kylie managed to settle herself down. She had needed this catharsis more than she fully understood. A huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She didn’t know if it was going to last, but in the moment, she was the happiest she had ever been.

“That’s some room you have there, Kylie.” Leah said. “It’s a shame that you don’t want to be a baby anymore.”

Kylie stepped back from her mom and glared at Leah. She wasn’t wrong, but it was something that didn’t need to be said. Kylie’s need for acceptance was far more important than the who or the what.

“That’s quite alright, Kylie. I’m not trying to force anything on you.” Lori said.

“Mom, wait, that’s not what I meant by that.” Kylie said, looking back at her mom. “I didn’t want this anymore if it meant that we couldn’t be near each other.

“I...I had so much that I wanted to say. I expected you to be the way you were and not understanding of what this means for me. But I see this, and it’s like you are a completely different person. I can’t help but feel elated and yet cautious. Can I really believe that this could be my life?”

“If this is the life you want, then yes. I can’t say that I will ever fully understand what this means for you or how it affects you but I can say that I accept that this is a part of you. A part that I didn’t know existed and a part that I may be responsible for.”

“It’s not your fault, Mom.”

“Maybe. And maybe not. But that doesn’t mean that I haven’t made my fair share of mistakes and I can’t rest easy until I’ve earned your forgiveness.”

“You have it, Mom.”

“No.” Lori said, shaking her head. “This is but the start. This is to show you that I’m finally listening.”

“Maybe a demonstration is in order.” Leah suggested, trying to speed the heart to heart along. Lori and Kylie were going to spend forever in the circle of apology and forgiveness. They were both stubborn in their own ways and although the moment was touching, it was taking too long.

Lori raised an eyebrow and Kylie blushed a little. Lori nodded in understanding and took her daughter by the hand. “Do you need to be changed?” She asked, and Kylie nodded slowly. Lori turned to Leah, “Diaper or pull up?”

“I think we are out of pull ups.”

“No we ain’t!” Kylie exclaimed and was immediately shushed by her mother’s finger pressed to her lips.

“Diaper then.” Lori said, leading Kylie into the room. Leah followed, smirking. Kylie glared at Leah over her shoulder as her mother led her to the changing table. “Kick your shoes off and hop onto the table,” instructed Lori, “you seem to want to be dressed like a big girl so you can do some things yourself.”

“But-”

“No butts, just yours, on the table.” Lori commanded.

Kylie pouted and stepped out of her flats, lifting herself up onto the table. Lori swung her legs up and pulled her leggings down. Kylie lifted her hips up as she was expected to.

“You’re soaked! But I guess that shouldn’t be a surprise, hmm?”

“Oh, but it is. She’s supposed to tell me when she needs to use the potty and not go in her pants. Clearly, she’s not ready for pull ups.”

“I would say not.” Lori said over Kylie’s whimpers. Lori tore the sides of the pull up and peeled it off like a diaper. “The wipes, powder, and diapers are in there.” She said, pointing to the closet. “I didn’t think you would be coming home so soon so I wasn’t ready.”

Leah pulled open the closet door and gasped. There were three stacks of disposable diapers, pack after pack stacked on top of each other that went from floor to ceiling, all with various designs and colors. Next to those stacks was a shelving system and progress had been made with opening packs of pull ups and stacking them neatly on the shelves, much like the diapers. To the right of those were several packages of wipes, about twenty of them, and a dozen bottles of powder. Past all of that were neatly hung outfits ranging from cute dresses to simple day to day clothing.

Kylie sat up and looked at the wealth of things in the closet and again felt like her mother’s intentions were genuine. Lori had always been frugal and to see all of the money spent on an endeavor that could have been for naught was nothing short of spectacular. She looked at her mom as Lori gently pushed her back down. Her mother smiled a sincere smile and for a moment, Kylie thought she was dreaming. That is, until the cold wipe hit her sensitive skin and she felt like putty in her mom’s hands. Leah was standing next to Lori, at Kylie’s feet, and was handing her things as they were needed. Lori unfolded the diaper and ruffled it, puffing it up before sliding it under Kylie. Leah handed the powder over and Lori expertly sprinkled it into the seat of the diaper before dusting it across Kylie’s region. She spread it around with her fingers before wiping them off with another wipe. She pulled the diaper up between Kylie’s legs and expertly taped it in place. She swung Kylie’s legs back towards the floor and helped her daughter stand up before bending down to pull her leggings up over her diaper. It was a tight fit and there was no mistaking the outline of the diaper. Kylie took one glance at her butt over her shoulder and pouted, crossing her arms across her chest. The thickness of the diaper made her butt stick out and thanks to the tightness of the leggings, her legs were pushed farther apart than normal and she had to waddle a little bit.

“There, all better. Doesn’t that feel better?” Lori asked.

Kylie stuck her bottom lip out and shook her head. Inside, she was euphoric. Her mother had taken care of her just like Donna would have. She commanded the room with absolute authority and yet, had the gentle caress of a loving parent.

“Answer your mother, Kylie, you weren’t raised to be rude.” Leah said sternly.

“Sowwy, Miss Leah. Yesh, Mommy. Fweals better.” Kylie babbled.

“That’s what I like to hear. Come, let’s go sit in the living room and enjoy our refreshments. I haven’t forgotten your love for grape juice.”

“Otay, Mommy.” Kylie said, leading the way. Lori and Leah followed behind, both taking a moment to pat Kylie’s padded butt as she passed between them. They followed her to the living room and Kylie instinctively sat on the floor. Lori, however, tapped the couch beside her. Kylie crawled up onto the couch and laid in her head in her mother’s lap. Lori stroked Kylie’s hair as her daughter melted into little space bliss.

“So, Leah was it? How do you know Kylie?”

“We met at college. I was her roommate.”

“Oh? You are that girl?!”

“Yeah.”

“And how did you come about knowing this side of Kylie?”

“Well, I was kind of a party girl and too much drinking led to some bedwetting incidents. I found that if I was planning on drinking a bunch, I should wear a little bit more protection. So, I started wearing pull ups when I went to parties.”

“The boys didn’t notice?”

“Drunk boys don’t notice much. A few seconds to tidy up in the bathroom is all it takes to pull them off. And you get the added benefit of guys thinking you spent the whole night pantiless.”

“That’s really clever!”

“I thought so. Turns out that it’s more common than I thought, at least at the college I

went to.”

“I see.” Lori said, pulling Kylie’s hand up so that Kylie could suck on her own thumb. “Did you know about Kylie?”

“Not immediately. I mean, I had some suspicions but I didn’t know for sure. I took a stab in the dark when our room kinda smelled like pee and I hadn’t been to a party in a week. I feel like I approached it well and didn’t say anything until the next time that I got wasted. I offered my friendship and a pack of pull ups.

“She left not long after and I hadn’t seen or heard from her until a few weeks ago when I saw her at the mall. I was going to just joke with her that she had graduated from pull ups to diapers before talking to her but when I went to grab her butt, I was surprised that my joke was her reality.”

“Interesting. So how did you go from that to here?”

“Well, I went with her that day to see what was really going on and had my eyes opened to this world of hers.”

“What do you think of this world of hers?” Lori said, before calling for Isabell. “Could you bring me a bottle?”

“Yes, Madam.”

“I guess that I don’t really know. I mean, it’s up to Kylie. If she wants to continue being little, then she would need someone to take care of her.”

“Indeed.” Lori said, taking the bottle from Isabell and putting it to Kylie’s lips. “I could use a babysitter or nanny.”

“I, um, don’t really like those terms.” Leah said, feeling like she was biting the hand that could potentially feed her. “I’d do the job but I think of myself as more like her big sister than a babysitter.”

Kylie nodded in Lori’s lap, sucking happily on the bottle.

“A big sister, huh? I can see that. Well, the job would be the same, either way, title notwithstanding. How does five hundred dollars a week sound?”

“A week?!”

“The Institute pays well.”

“I, uhh, well, I’d have to think about it.”

Kylie bolted up with a start and looked at Leah. “Do I have to beg?” She asked, rolling off her mother’s lap. She crawled towards Leah saying Pwease, Pwease, Pwease! She stopped just short of Leah’s chair and looked up at her from her hands and knees. “Pwease, Leah? Will you be my big sissy?”

“You know I don’t like it when you beg for things.”

“I only beg to get my way.”

Leah looked down at Kylie’s hopeful, innocent face. “You’re not going to let me say no, are you?”

“Did you really want to?”

Leah sighed. “No. Not really.”

“It won’t be just warming bottles and changing diapers. That’s a major part of it, but I’m expecting you to be her best friend.”

“You don’t have to pay me for that.” Leah said, patting her lap. Kylie crawled up into Leah’s lap and laid her head on Leah’s shoulder.

“I know, but there is a lot more to this than just being a big sister. As a caregiver, her mental health as well as her physical needs to be taken into account. There will be days when she doesn’t feel like being little and there will be stretches where that is all she wants.” Lori explained, sounding like she knew far more about Kylie’s progress than she should. In truth, Lori had been instrumental in transitioning many clients from the Institute’s care back into the real world.

Leah was patting Kylie’s butt and rocking slightly. “Sounds like long term aftercare.”

“It is, essentially. There’s some red tape to go through first, but you will be in charge of her day to day little activities when you two have agreed on what her long term care looks like.

“We’ve found that this transition works best when the client has a say in what happens next.” It was strange for Kylie to hear her mother talk about her as a client and not as her daughter. There was a clear professional line that she walked when talking business.

“Okay. I’m sure we will come to some form of agreement.”

“I suggest that you talk to Donna and Mark about what they think she needs and make a plan from there. Some things she may not want because she doesn’t like them but it doesn’t mean she doesn’t need them.”

Kylie whispered in Leah’s ear. “Like spankings.”

Leah didn’t acknowledge Kylie’s words but nodded to Lori. “I’ll have to do that. I’m sure that there is a lot that she doesn’t want me to know.”

Kylie whispered something else but Leah ignored it. She would have to deal with her potty mouth later but she had to focus on what Lori was saying.

“Do you have any suggestions?” Leah asked

“No. I don’t. I haven’t spent the time with her that I should have so I don’t really have a

place to speak. What I can say is that her happiness is paramount. As long as you can keep that in mind, I’m sure you will be fine.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it. I’m really happy I’ve had the chance to see her.”

Kylie sat up. “I’m happy too, Mom. For everything.”

“So you like your room?”

“I love it!”

“I’m glad because it will be here whenever you want to come home.”

“Soon, I hope.” “Soon?” Leah asked.

“Yeah. I think it’s time. There are only a few things I have left to do.”

“Like?”

“I’ll tell you later. No offence, Mom, but there are things I can’t tell you right now.”

“That’s fine, dear. It’s probably best that I don’t know, but, if you want to talk about anything, ever, just know that I am here to listen.”

“I know. And I appreciate that.”

“I mean it, though. You can talk to me about anything. Judgement free.” Lori said. “My ears and mind are finally open.”

“More open than I thought.” Kylie said, getting off Leah’s lap. She shuffled a little bit to adjust herself. Lori looked around her to Leah. Leah shook her head and mimicked looking at her watch, indicating that it wasn’t time for Kylie to be changed.

“Quite. And we can talk about it later.” Lori said, standing up. “I’m sure you are due to be home, but how about you sit here and finish your bottle while I talk to Leah privately.”

Down the hall and in Lori’s bedroom, Leah stood in the doorway while Lori flopped onto her bed with a huge sigh of relief.

“How’d I do?” She asked Leah.

“Phenomenal. She was completely blown away.”

“She was and it makes me smile. I can’t thank you enough for all that you’ve done.” “I haven’t really done anything. I was just trying to be a good friend.”

“A good friend that’s willing to stand up to her friend’s mother. I wouldn’t have made these changes if not for you.”

“I doubt that. I’ll let you believe it, but after seeing Isabell, I’m sure you would have come around eventually.”

“It’s not easy knowing that this is the life that my daughter is choosing.”

“I don’t think it will be a full time affair, just when she needs that little bit of pick me up.”

“Hopefully. Are you sure that you can handle taking care of her? I’ll talk to HR on

Monday about getting you on the payroll.”

“I’m confident that I can manage things. She likes spending time with me.” Leah said.

“Though I wonder why you don’t want to take care of her yourself.”

“Oh, that’s simple. I want to be her mother and her friend. I don’t want our relationship to be just this. I want her to be able to come to me with anything and everything. What she needs, I don’t think I can give her. She needs friendship and space to explore her new identity. She needs rules and limitations. A structure. Maybe I’m not saying it right. I want to know the adult she is, not the child she needs to be at times, does that make any sense?”

“A little. It sounds like you want distance from that part of her. But if that is the case, then why did you go through all the effort to remake her room into a nursery? Why did you change her?”

“Because I’d rather have her in my life than not. If the price I pay for that privilege is changing her adult diapers, then I will happily pay. I want to understand this part of her. I truly do. I see people like her cross my desk every day and I want to understand what she gets from all of this. But my personal issues get in the way. I still feel like this is absurd but I’m working on it. Being a better parent takes time. I can’t just switch it off. So I want to help her from a distance for now.

“The room? The supplies? It’s all in preparation for when she’s comfortable enough to come home. That’s why I wanted to hire you. I feel that you can bridge that gap and be a barrier between her and me.

“I don’t want to push her away again. That’s how she ended up in the Institute in the first place. I want to help her and the best way I can right now is to just give her all the tools and support possible.”

“I think I understand and I agree with you. Repairing a relationship like this can’t be easy.

I’ll do what I can to help you both reconnect.”

“I’m sure that we will reconnect just fine. But you best be getting going now. Can’t have too much of a good thing. You two should come to Isabell’s housewarming party. I’d like to see you again in a social setting and see how Kylie behaves when out in public.”

“I’ll let her know and we will be there. I do have a lot to talk with her about so, yeah, we should get going.”

“Leah? Thank you for being there for her. It means a lot to me.”

“I can tell. I’ll be in touch with her progress.”

“Off the books. I technically can’t know how she’s doing.”

“Off the books then.” Leah said, heading for the door. “I’ll talk with you later.” She returned to the living room and collected Kylie, who had fallen asleep, curled up in a ball on the couch. The bottle was empty, half hanging out of her mouth. Lori and Leah looked at her for a moment, savoring the precious sight, before Leah gently shook Kylie awake.

“Time to go, Princess. Give your mom a hug goodbye.”

Kylie groggily sat up, rubbing her eyes. She unsteadily stood up and fell into her mother’s arms.

“Wuv you, Mommy.” She said, before heading for the door. She went right outside and to the car before Lori could utter the words.

“Love you too, sweetheart.” There was sadness in her eyes like she wasn’t ready for her daughter to leave.

Leah picked up on it. “You will see her again soon. I promise.”

“I know. She’s in good hands.”

Leah drove them back to Mark’s house and Kylie slept. Leah thought about how the day hadn’t been wasted after all and now she had a job on top of it. There would have to be some ground rules put in place but she was confident that Kylie would be open to them. She had her own fears and trepidations about where things were going but she kept them to herself. She figured that she could help Kylie restore her relationship with her mother and slowly excuse herself from the situation. She was pleased to have found employment, even if she had to fudge the truth a bit for her parents, she wasn’t sure if she could make a career out of it. What she did know was that a certain little girl was in need of a diaper change and a spanking, but that wouldn’t be until later. For now, she drove, and let her mind wander towards the future and what it might hold for her and her little sister.

Part Thirteen: Determination

The ride home was uneventful. Kylie looked out of the window of the car, lost in her thoughts. Her brief nap on her mom’s couch wasn’t enough to get the fuzzy sleepiness out of her head. She thought about the future and what it meant. She had expected to leave her mother’s house so angry that she wouldn’t be returning for quite some time. That wasn’t the case. She felt welcome there and missed even. It was a strange feeling and one that she didn’t fully trust, but at the same time, she knew that if she was to ever move forward, she couldn’t dwell on the past. Her mother was making a real attempt to meet her in the middle. The makeover of her room was the biggest sign of her mother’s change.

Lori would normally have been antagonistic towards Kylie for needing to be changed. She would have said something condescending and griped the whole time while she was changing Kylie. The guilt would have made things worse and Kylie would have most likely been wet or ready to pee before she even got back on her feet. There was none of that from her mother. She was caring and understanding, her touches were gentle and loving, and she was really trying to make the best of the situation. Kylie felt a little uneasy that it was only just a facade but she needed things to work out so badly that she dared to hope.

What does this mean? What do I do now? Do I go back and live with Mom? Then what? She hired Leah to take care of me, but what does that mean? Is this even what I want? Who are you kidding? Of course I want this. I want someone to keep me in diapers. I want someone to force me into them. But I can’t tell my mother that. I can’t tell her that I get aroused by being pushed around and forcibly regressed. She wouldn’t get it and I don’t know how to explain it. I know that I like wearing diapers but only when I’m made to. Who do I tell this to? How do I say that I just want diapers as a quote unquote punishment? I still want to do adult things. Go to parties. Hang out with my friends. That sort of thing. And as long as no one knows what I have under my clothes, I’m not hurting anyone. Maybe I’ll try talking with Leah or Mommy Donna later. There has to be a way that I can explain this that they will understand. I hope Leah understands. She still owes me a spanking. She’s so good at those!

Her body twitched a little in arousal and she blushed. She put her hands between her knees and clenched her thighs closed. Her wet diaper rubbed against her princess parts and it sent waves of pleasure throughout her body. She remembered her time in the crib with Lucy, where she learned of her affinity towards wet diaper masturbation. She hadn’t had a chance to have those feelings again since she came out of the pod, but it was always on her mind. She didn’t know if Apple could tell what kind of effect she had whenever she had bossy talked to Kylie but she had a way of making Kylie quiver in all the right ways. Donna used to have that effect, but as they spent more time together, their relationship became more mother and child than caregiver and client. She had felt the same way when Leah had first spanked her and she yearned for it to happen again. Earlier in the day had been great as Leah had been so controlling and constantly reminded Kylie of her place, but there was a hollowness to it. Leah was operating on the belief that she was keeping Kylie in little space and that wasn’t what Kylie truly wanted.

Little space. That protective barrier between the real Kylie and the almost real Kylie. She used little space as her way to play along with the expectations everyone had of her. It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t the truth. It was a half-truth at its best. To her, little space was the gateway to the real her. It was the aftercare. The only problem was there was no before, no lead up, and certainly no payoff.

“Are you okay, Kylie? Do you need to potty?”

Kylie looked at Leah with a blank expression, confused. She looked down and saw that her hands were between her legs and she was trying to clamp the wet mass of her diaper tighter into her body.

“Oh! No...I’m, uh, fine. I’m fine.” Kylie said quickly, blushing again. She looked back out the window and chastised herself for letting things get out of hand.

“I see. Well, I will have you to know that the potty is off limits to you anyway, so it doesn’t matter.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Kylie wasn’t in her little space so the words she heard were like an adult.

“I don’t remember stuttering. But I’ll say it again, you are not allowed to use the potty.”

“Why not?”

“Because I said so. You seem to forget that you are the one in a diaper, and I expect you to use it as intended.”

“A dia- What?!”

Leah reached over and pushed her hand between Kylie’s legs, grabbing her diaper area.

“How quickly we forget our place, hmmm?”

Leah’s grasp was firm and it smashed the wetness against Kylie’s parts. Kylie inhaled sharply. Audibly. Her face reddened as she wrenched her body away from Leah’s reach. Leah pulled the car over into the parking lot of a supermarket and put it in park far away from any other car. She shut the car off and they sat there for a moment.

Looking straight ahead, Leah finally spoke. “Kylie? I need to ask you something and I need you to be honest with me. Completely honest. Do you understand?”

Kylie was quiet for a moment before finally speaking. “Yes. I understand.”

“Good. Because I don’t know how to continue doing this. I...think that you are hiding something from me. I think that you have a secret that you are too scared to tell anyone. And you don’t have to say it if you don’t want to, but I have to know. Do diapers turn you on?”

Kylie stayed silent. She didn’t know what to say. If she lied, she could lose Leah forever. If she told the truth, she could frighten Leah away. She was damned if she did, and damned if she didn’t. She thought about the lessons that Donna had taught her. Honesty. Honesty with everything. For there to be honesty between Leah and her, there had to be truth.

“No. Diapers don’t turn me on.” Kylie calmly said. “Not by themselves.”

“Not by themselves?”

“No. It’s not the item, it’s the feeling. Being in a diaper is a comfort. It’s calming.”

“Then why did you pull away from me? I’ve checked your diaper before and you’ve never acted like that.”

“Because what I said isn’t the whole story. Wearing a diaper isn’t arousing, but being put in one is. Having someone take control of me like that and making me into a baby is arousing.

I...guess I...like...being forced.”

“Like a domination thing?”

“Kinda. I look at it as a humiliation thing. I can’t be trusted to be an adult so therefore, I must be a baby.”

“I guess that explains your penchant for being spanked.”

“There is an allure to being punished.” Kylie said, feeling a tightness in her chest.

Everything rode on how Leah took to her honesty.

“You could have all of that without diapers. So, why don’t you?”

“Because I like giving up control…”

“That’s not the truth.”

“I...this isn’t easy you know? It’s not like I haven’t tried to say all of this before.” Kylie said with a sigh. “But you are right. That’s not the truth. I’m too embarrassed to tell you the truth.” “Do I need to beat it out of you?” Leah asked, half joking.

“Yes.” Kylie said, matter of factly. “I-I’m very vulnerable right now.”

“It would be wrong of me to take advantage of you then.” Leah said, unbuckling her seat belt.

“Very wrong.” Kylie said, trembling. Leah turned towards her and leaned in. Kylie sat frozen in place as Leah undid her seat belt. She felt it pull across her chest as her heart pounded. With her right hand, Leah reached up and grasped Kylie by the chin, turning her gaze. With her left, she pulled her palm up from Kylie’s knees to her diaper area. As her hand inched closer, Kylie’s breath quickened. Leah squeezed with her right and looked into Kylie’s eyes.

“What is this? Is someone afraid I would discover her little secret? Is the big bad adult in my car really just a scared little girl? You didn’t think I would find out did you? You didn’t think anyone would know that you secretly love to wear diapers? Is your diaper wet? Do you want me to change you?”

Kylie was panting, unable to break free of Leah’s grasp and commanding presence. She couldn’t break her lock with Leah’s eyes. She could feel Leah’s hand rubbing her diaper, pressing the warm, wet mush into her princess parts. Her loins were afire and she was captivated by Leah’s words and touch.

“Want is the wrong word, isn’t it? Need is what I mean. You need me to change you. You need me to lay you down. To remove your clothes. To clean you. Powder you. And put you back into a diaper like the little baby we know you are. But you will fight, won’t you? You will struggle and squirm and try to get away, but it’ll just make it more satisfying when I tape it on you. Maybe I’ll have to put you over my knee first, redden that little butt of yours, and remind you of what you really are.” Leah leaned in closer, her lips practically touching Kylie’s. Her left hand was rubbing circles into Kylie’s princess parts and she was so close to release that she was shaking from her lips to her toes. It would only take a few more choice words. “My little baby.”

Kylie erupted, shaking and moaning, her body convulsing as she orgasmed. Leah’s lips had brushed hers, coupled with her words, and the motions pushed into her diaper, Kylie couldn’t take it anymore. It was so intense that her toes curled and she hadn’t realized it but she had been thrusting her pelvis into Leah’s gyrating hand.

“That’s a good girl.” Leah said, removing her left hand but remained holding Kylie’s chin with her right. “I think we’ve reached an understanding.”

Kylie nodded slowly, still trying to catch her breath.

“I’ll let you in on a little secret, Kylie.” Leah said, reaching across her to grab the seat belt. As she pulled it across Kylie’s chest, she brushed against Kylie’s breasts, causing her to twitch and moan. “I know exactly how you feel. I’ve done my share of experimentation. Granted, mine was in pull ups, but I think we made it work, don’t you?”

Kylie furiously nodded. She could barely think straight. Her body was still tingling and she was completely euphoric.

Leah settled back into her seat, got buckled, and started the car. She headed back out onto the road and they were quickly heading to Mark’s house. Leah focused on the road but dug in her purse and pulled out Kylie’s pacifier. She held it in her palm over the center console. She didn’t have to hold it long before Kylie took it from her hand and slipped it into her own mouth.

“Good girl.” Leah said, without taking her eyes off the road.

The rest of the car ride was in silence as Kylie brought her knees up to her chest and fell asleep in a ball, sucking on her pacifier. The sun was going down as Leah pulled the car into Mark’s driveway. She had to shake Kylie awake and she led her by the hand into the house. Kylie was exhausted and could barely see straight. Leah expertly led her downstairs and helped her get into her crib. She lifted the gate on it and locked it in place. She was sure that Kylie was in dire need of a change but sleep was more important. Kylie rolled onto her side and pulled Quackers to her chest. She sighed in contentment and was snoring not long after.

Leah watched her for a few moments before heading back upstairs. It had been an eventful day and although it was only dusk, she was tired. Donna was waiting for her at the kitchen table.

“How was your day, dear?” Donna asked.

“Busy.” Leah replied, sitting down and exhaling loudly.

“I bet. It sounds like it didn’t go as you expected.”

“It didn’t. It started off well, and then she threw a curveball at me.” “Oh?” Donna said, stirring her coffee and clinking her spoon on the cup.

“Yeah. We were at the mall having a good time and out of nowhere she tells me that she doesn’t want to be a baby anymore.”

“She didn’t like how you were treating her?” Donna asked.

“She liked it, it just wasn’t what she wanted.”

“What did she want?”

“She wanted to confront her mother.” Leah said and Donna’s eyebrow raised. “I didn’t know what to do at the time and just wanted to make her happy so I took her to her mom’s house.”

“That had to be awkward.”

“It was, let me tell you. I totally expected a screaming match between the two of them but surprisingly, there was nothing of the sort. They were perfectly civil and more surprisingly, her mom seems open to accepting Kylie being a baby.”

“That’s surprising.”

“And to top it off, I found out that her mom has some boy living with her that wants to become a girl!”

“Is this a problem for you?”

“No. Not at all. It’s just shocking to finally meet the woman that I’ve heard so much about and finding out that she’s turned over a new leaf!”

“You’d be surprised what people will do for their kids.” Donna said, sipping her drink.

Leah looked at Donna with suspicion. “You know something, don’t you?”

“I know a few things, but a large part of the job is figuring things out for yourself.”

“You know about the job?”

Donna smiled and stood up. “Let’s go check on the girls.” Leah followed Donna downstairs to find both Kylie and Lucy still asleep. “There’s some things that can’t be said in mixed company.”

“Such as.”

“Such as there are limits and rules to what I’m allowed to do and who I can talk to and the house is bugged. Down here, there is no audio and only video on the cribs, but in the bathroom here, we have some privacy.”

“Why all of the secrecy?”

“Because some things are better left said in trusted company.” They went into the bathroom and closed the door. “For your ears only.” Donna warned. “I’ve been talking with Lori for some time and have been helping her come to terms with her daughter’s condition. We are expressly forbidden from engaging with the parents but Kylie is a special case. I want her to succeed more than anything else.”

“Why?”

“Because her success means the end of this charade. Moira, Mark, the Institute, it all has to come crumbling down. But it’s not something that any one person can do. We need to be smart and careful.”

“What do you need me for?”

“At the moment, nothing. All you need to do is keep Kylie happy. Her success in the program is the first falling domino.”

“That’s it?”

“That’s an effort in and of itself. She’s been holding something back from me and I don’t know what it is.”

“I think I might.”

“Good. Keep it to yourself. Her success isn’t dependent on my ability alone.” Donna said. “There are a few more things that need to fall into place before anything happens but I’m trusting you to not say a word about this to anyone.”

“I won’t. I don’t even know what’s going on.”

Donna smiled. “That’s what I like to hear. Now, about this job of yours.”

“Is there anything you don’t know?”

“Plenty. But I pride myself on knowing people. You’d be surprised at how far you can get in life by just knowing how people work.”

“And you are never wrong?”

Donna laughed. “Occasionally, but it’s rare.”

“Well, as much fun as girl talk in the bathroom is, I must be getting on home.”

“Not quite yet. Your job doesn’t end until she’s put down for the night. Perks of a big sister.”

Leah nodded. “I’m sure she won’t be awake for a bit. She’s had an eventful day.”

“Oh, I’m sure that she’ll be up before you know it.”

“So what does this mean? This job. What’s all in it.”

“Seeing to her needs, making sure she’s happy.”

“I’ve heard that before, but it’s vague.”

They left the bathroom to check on the girls. Lucy was awake but Kylie wasn’t.

“It’s open for interpretation. I think you are finding your way.”

“I think so too, but what if my way is different from yours? Or the program?”

“Then you have moved beyond the limited scope the program offers. All of this, while successful in it’s own way, doesn’t allow for a lot of flexibility. Helping people, especially individuals, requires that you be able to think on your feet and adapt to the situation. It also means that you shouldn’t think there is only one solution to a problem. People are far more complex than that.

“The simple reality is that you don’t need me. You don’t need my advice. All you need is the insight as to what makes her happy and the drive to make it happen.”

“That sounds far too simple.”

“Sometimes the simplest answer is the right one. Not because it’s simple, but because it's pure.”

Kylie stirred, pushing Quackers away and stretching. Leah went over to the crib to see if she was waking up. It appeared so, so Leah grabbed a clean pull up and the wipes.

“Pull ups? I thought she had earned her diapers.”

“It’s a long story, but I think that I will take her out for something to eat before I get her settled into bed. I am of the belief that each nap is a fresh start.”

“That’s pretty amazing of you. Lucy here, on the other hand, needs to stay in diapers, isn’t that right?” Lucy nodded earnestly. Kylie looked over at her but didn’t say anything. She just laid there while Leah pulled her leggings down and undid her diaper. She was soaked so much that there wasn’t a dry spot in the thing. Leah guessed that she had peed at least five times since being put in it. Leah got the soaked garment off Kylie, wrapping it into a ball and setting it aside. She wiped Kylie down thoroughly before taking care of the waste. She left Kylie there to air out before unfolding the pull up.

“Kick off your pants and come here.” Leah told her. She held the pull up open for Kylie to step into. “We will see if you can keep these dry while we go out for dinner, but I’ll pack some diapers for you.”

“Don’t need them!” Kylie said defiantly.

“You will wear what I tell you to wear, when I tell you to wear them! And unless you want to stand for dinner, I suggest you mind your tone.”

“But...but...I a good girl.”

“Then act like one.” Leah said, pulling the pull up up Kylie’s thighs. She wiggled it a little bit as she pulled them up, making sure they were sitting right. She pulled Kylie forward a little to rub her hand around Kylie’s bottom before giving her a few playful swats. “Get your pants on and meet me upstairs. Don’t dilly dally.” Leah tried to sound as nonchalant as possible. She wanted to come off as aloof to the whole thing, like making an adult wear pull ups and threatening them with diapers was an everyday occurrence.

Kylie, however, loved it. She didn’t want wearing pull ups to be a noteworthy thing and she loved being threatened with diapers. It left the decision up to her as to whether or not she was put in them and being treated like a toddler was awesome. She pulled her leggings up as Donna and Lucy watched. Donna had a little smile on her face while Lucy seemed concerned. She knew she would have to talk to them at some point but for the moment, she had been told to be somewhere and she didn’t want to be late.

Upstairs, Kylie found Leah in the kitchen, preparing a sippy cup. She took one glance at

Kylie before checking the time. She handed the cup to Kylie and bustled around getting a few other things together. She had pulled the diaper bag apart and was packing it her way when she stopped and grinned.

“Kylie, go downstairs and pick three diapers for the bag.” She said, knowing full well that it was humiliating for her. Kylie puckered her lower lip but turned and went back down stairs. She stood in front of the diaper cabinet and stared at the selection. Every fiber in her being wanted to refuse. It had been ingrained in her that she wasn’t allowed to touch her diapers. That was her mother’s rule, Donna’s rule, Apple’s rule, and Mark’s rule. She dared to wonder what would happen if they caught her breaking that rule.

“What are you doing, Kylie?” A voice behind her asked, making her jump.

“L-Leah told me to get three diapers.” She replied.

“I see. And are you supposed to touch your diapers?”

“N-No.” She said, “But I supposed to do what I is told.”

“Yes, you are, which leaves you at a conundrum. Do you disobey our rules or disobey your caregiver?”

“I-I….” She thought for a moment, before having an eureka moment. “Can you help me?”

Apple smiled. “Of course I can, sweety. Which ones would you like?”

Kylie pointed to three different stacks and Apple pulled one out from each stack. She carried them upstairs as Kylie followed and set them on the table. Leah looked at her incredulously before turning to Kylie.

“That’s not what I told you to do. I told you to pick them out and bring them to me.”

“I-”

“She asked for my help.” Apple interjected. “You know that she’s not allowed to touch her diapers.”

“I do. I also know that for her to feel the gravity of her actions, she must have an intimate knowledge of what she will carry in this bag.”

“I think wearing them is intimate knowledge enough.”

“I disagree. Think of it like a spanking. You know it’s coming. You don’t know when, but you know. What’s better, being pulled over the knee and spanked, or having to go get the paddle and carry it to the person who is going to use it on you?”

“She has a point, Apple.” Mark said, coming into the room. He had been in his chair as he normally was but was listening to the conversation. He reached out and ran his hand along the back of Kylie’s head. Leah saw Kylie tense. It wasn’t much, but it was enough. “Knowing what’s coming isn’t the same as feeling it.”

“Sir, I-I meant no disrespect.”

“It’s fine, Apple.” Leah said. “I appreciate your intentions.” “So, where are you going?” Mark said, ignoring Apple.

“I’m taking Kylie to dinner.” Leah said.

“I see. Well, while you are out, could you run an errand for me?”

Leah didn’t sense anything suspicious. “Yes.”

“Good. Could you swing by my pharmacy and pick up a delivery? Apple knows the one. She will go with you.” He turned to Apple. “Check on the girls while you are there. Tonya has been getting a little out of hand and I left Marion in charge.”

Mark returned to the living room, his eyes already on his phone. The girls had a weird feeling about the exchange but kept it to themselves. Apple had an inkling of what he was talking about but didn’t want to say anything. She went to her room and pulled out her purse from her drawer. She didn’t have a dresser, she only had a drawer. Most of her clothes were hanging in the closet that she didn’t have access to. Like all other parts of her life, everything was controlled by him. To even say she had a purse was a bit of a misnomer. Sure, it was a purse like most others, but all that was inside was her identification badges for the Institute and the Pharmacy. Her licence was there but it didn’t have her real name on it. Her entire identity was created and controlled by him. She didn’t even have any feminie hygiene supplies or any makeup. These were things that he only allowed when the time was right, no complaints, no excuses. She glanced at the cage under the bed and involuntarily shuddered. She couldn’t wait for this facade to be over.

She pushed such thoughts from her mind and met Leah and Kylie at the door. Kylie had the backpack slung over her left shoulder and she was holding her sippy cup with her right.

Leah was twirling her keys. She bid farewell to him as she followed Leah and Kylie out the door. It was the first time since she remembered her name that she had been outside the house. While the scenery looked the same, there was a freshness to it, like she was seeing it for the first time with new eyes.

Kylie got in the backseat and got buckled. Leah didn’t know about Sarah and for now, Kylie was content to keep it that way. Apple/ Sarah directed Leah to the pharmacy, about a thirty minute drive from Mark’s house. Sarah gazed out the window at a world that had passed her by, suddenly feeling older and far more damaged than she was willing to admit.

“I’m sorry about all of this. I didn’t intend on ruining your dinner.” She said to Leah.

“You didn’t. And there is no need to apologize. I’ll do whatever I have to to make sure he keeps his hands off Kylie.”

“It’s just the way he is.” She said, lying to protect him because it was all she had done for years.

“It’s creepy.” Leah retorted.

Sarah didn’t say anything else, besides giving directions. She didn’t want to have the same old argument that she’d had so many times before.

The pharmacy was unassuming considering who owned it. The Institute logo was prominently hung above the sliding doors. Sarah knew it too well. Far too well. They walked in an Apple headed straight for Marion. They walked around, chatting. There were a few people in the store but they didn’t pay them any mind.

Leah and Kylie walked around the aisles, looking at everything. There wasn’t anything of interest. They loitered down the makeup aisle. Teenage girls will be teenage girls. Leah kept an eye on Apple as she headed from the front of the store to one of the other workers. They exchanged a quick conversation before she pulled the worker to the back and they disappeared behind the employee only doors.

When they returned ten minutes later, the worker looked rather distraught. She was wiping her eyes and looking uncomfortable. Apple/ Sarah seemed agitated but tried not to show it. She came over to Leah and Kylie still in the makeup aisle and was carrying a small package.

“We are done here.” She said shortly.

“Everything okay?” Leah asked.

“Yes. It’s not the first time I’ve had to come up here.”

“For deliveries?”

“The deliveries are an excuse for me to come up here and remind these girls of his rules. While he’s in control while they live with us, when they leave the house, he has no access to them. He employs them but can’t discipline them or anything.”

“So he sends you?”

“As a reminder.”

“Reminder of what?”

“His influence. He likes to act like they are his girls. Forever. And that at any time, he can impose his will upon them.”

There was a silence between them as they left the pharmacy and returned to the car.

Leah headed back to Mark’s house.

“What do you mean?” Kylie asked from the backseat. “How does he impose his will on us?”

“There are ways. Most of the time, he demands that they wear pull ups or something of that sort. Behaving he calls it. He will have the girls send him pictures of their undergarments. He will want me to inspect them. But his most vile thing he does, and only for the special ones, is marking.”

“Marking?”

“I call it branding.”

“Branding? Like what you do to cattle?”

“Yes. Although not with an iron, with a tattoo.”

“He tattooed you?”

Sarah was quiet. Too quiet. She sighed and wiped a tear from her eye. She leaned the seat all the way back and lifted up her shirt. She undid her pants and slid them down. She paused a moment before swallowing hard and sliding down her cotton panties. Just under the edge of her bikini line was a tattoo. Kylie leaned forward to get a better look. The Institute’s logo was clear and to the left of that was Mark’s initials. Apple/ Sarah was Mark’s baby, groomed for years to be completely obedient to him.

“That’s...that’s terrible.” Kylie said.

“How long have you had it?” Leah asked.

“I can’t remember how long I’ve had it. All I know is that even if I can escape him, I’ll never be free of him.” Apple/ Sarah replied.

“You will, Sarah.” Kylie said. “I’m sure of it. We just need a little bit more time.” “Time? Time for what?” Leah asked.

Kylie and Sarah were quiet for a moment. There was a weight on their shoulders. One, a tortured life of subjugation. The other, the heroic, arduous path of redemption. Sarah couldn’t wait to let it all go and Kylie couldn’t let it go.

“...Liberation…” Sarah whispered, putting her clothes back as they should.

They drove for a few more miles and Sarah filled Leah in on everything she had been through. It took all she had to not vomit all over the steering wheel. The implications were staggering and slowly, piece by piece, she knew that it all had to come crashing down. Mark. Donna. The Institute. All of it had to burn.

Part Fourteen: Housewarming

Kylie stirred sleepily in the bed. She was a baby, but she didn’t care. She fondly remembered the night before when Leah had taken her to dinner, dinner after dropping Sarah off at Mark’s house. They had tried their best to keep the seriousness of their time together. It hadn’t been easy, but they had made it happen. Dinner wasn’t anything special, but the time was. They didn’t play out the dynamic, they were just two adults having a good time.

It didn’t become a great time until later. Leah took her back to Leah’s parent’s house. They had gone out for the night and the girls had the house to themselves. They stayed up late, watching movies, giggling over boys and the like. Kylie managed to use the bathroom like an adult several times through the night, but hadn’t bothered to ask for permission. Leah hadn’t said anything, just kept things to herself. She wanted to act on it. She wanted to pull Kylie over her knee and redden her ass until the tears flowed. But that wasn’t really her. Sure, she could be the disciplinarian, she had it in her, she just preferred to have a more subtle approach. If she had to be the boss she wanted Kylie to want it that way, to give over control willingly.

The night wore on and as Kylie got sleepy, she wondered when or if Leah was planning to take her home. She had spent so many months sleeping in a crib that she kind of looked forward to it. There weren’t any signs that Leah intended to take her home and she began to grow nervous.

“Ready for bed?” Leah asked as the movie they were watching ended. “You look sleepy.” “I am sleepy. It’s been a long day.” Kylie replied.

“C’mon then, I’ll show you where my room is.”

“I’m staying here for the night?”

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t you?”

“I...Donna wouldn’t wan-”

“I’ve already talked to Donna. You are my responsibility now and I say it’s okay.”

“You’re my new Mommy?”

Leah laughed. “No. I’m not your Mommy. You don’t need a Mommy anymore. What you have is a big sister who wants to have a sleepover with you.”

“A sleepover?!” Kylie had never been to a sleepover. She never had the friends that were so welcoming as to invite her over for the night.

“Yeah! You and I, just two girls staying up late, eating junk food, and having a good time!” Leah’s bedroom was modest compared to the rest of the house, as far as bedrooms go. While the house reflected the upper middle class of the people that built it, Leah’s parents had slowly made it their own via alterations. Leah’s room hadn’t been touched, save for the decorations on the walls, and would have been the last room that was remodeled. Leah’s influence over it was minor, the previous occupant had been a simple girl and that simplicity was what attracted Leah to it.

Kylie had peered into the room once or twice in between trips to the bathroom. The most of it she saw was through the gap of the partially closed door. Leah had opened it just enough to toss the diaper bag onto the bed and before whisking Kylie away. Now, with the door wide open, Kylie was amazed at how similar their tastes were.

“Well, what do you think?” Leah asked, doing a small twirl in the middle of her floor.

“I like it. It’s cozy.”

“Cozy, huh?” Leah said, looking around. “Yeah, I guess you could say that. I haven’t had a chance to really redecorate since college. Been too busy.”

“Why redecorate?”

“Cause this is the room of a younger, more naive me. I’ve grown up. Seen some things.” “Good things?” Kylie asked tentatively.

“So far.” Leah said, pulling her shirt off and undoing her bra.

Kylie averted her gaze but it was pointless. Having roomed with Leah in college, she had seen her friend naked on more than one occasion. She fidgeted in place. While she was comfortable around Leah, and being naked, she wasn’t comfortable enough to sleep near someone else in a pull up. She was still wetting at night and didn’t want to wet the bed with her friend/ caregiver next to her.

Leah undid her pants and slid them down off her hips, exposing the polyester panties she was wearing. She always liked to dress and feel sexy and knowing what she was wearing that people couldn’t see was exciting for her. She could feel Kylie’s eyes on her but didn’t take it personally. She was used to people looking at her body, guys and girls alike.

Down to her bra and panties, she turned to Kylie. “You going to sleep in that?”

“I...uh…”

“Here, raise your arms, I’ll help.” Leah moved over to Kylie and lifted the girl’s shirt. Kylie raised her arms above her head and as Leah lifted the shirt over her face, she paused. Kylie couldn’t see anything but could feel Leah’s hot breath on her face.

“Wha-”

“Shhh.” Leah said, taking a step closer. Kylie could feel Leah’s presence. They were practically touching. Leah held the shirt over Kylie’s eyes and leaned in, brushing her lips across Kylie’s. Kylie trembled and inhaled sharply. Kylie heard a weird sound, one that she couldn’t place, but figured it out quickly when Leah nibbled on her bottom lip, before pressing her lips to Kylie’s. The kiss was soft and sensual, somewhat timid and yet emotional. Kylie let her arms drop, pulling the shirt down and freeing her sight.

Kylie looked into Leah’s dazzling eyes, the reflection of the ceiling fan blades dancing in a sea of blue. Hope glimmered in those eyes and Kylie felt lost in them. She stared intently into the sea until she felt a tug at her hips. She looked down to see Leah sliding her hands down Kylie’s hips. Leah tucked her fingers in between Kylie’s hips and the pull up, pushing all of her clothes down. The pull up was wedged between Kylie’s thighs and required Kylie to spread her legs a little.

“You won’t need these tonight, right?” Kylie tried to talk but couldn’t. She was confused, aroused, and confused on why she was aroused. “I didn’t think so.”

Kylie stepped out of her pants as Leah pulled her shirt up again, stealing another kiss. This one was quicker and more forceful but only with the intended goal of getting the shirt completely off. Naked and exposed, Kylie moaned as Leah moved from kissing her lips to moving down her neck, pausing at the collarbone, and giving Kylie a little nibble.

The same hands that had wiped her and cared for her now rubbed her. Commanded her. Without the padding and infantile clothes, Kylie was a woman; a woman on the cusp of sexual liberation. Leah controlled her, pushing her gently to the bed. Kylie said down with a gasp of surprise and Leah smiled. She stood between Kylie’s legs and reached behind her to undo her bra. She let it slowly fall off her shoulders before tossing it with the rest of her clothes. Kylie was leaning back on her hands as Leah snaked her fingers through Kylie’s hair. Leah cautiously pulled Kylie’s head forward into her ample chest. Kylie’s reaction was immediate, kissing, licking, and sucking. Kylie’s hands joined in and Leah moaned in response.  Arousal reached a fever pitch quickly and it wasn’t long before Leah forcefully pushed Kylie onto the bed.

When it was over, Kylie left the bed and got in the shower. She needed to use the bathroom for one and she needed a moment to think. Making love with Leah was unlike anything she’d ever experienced and her mind was relatively blown. She needed the shower to wash away her innocence and to clear her mind. She didn’t know if she felt in love with Leah, but there was a bond there that had been solidified in their fiery passion. She felt something so real that everything else seemed to melt away, at least under the torrents of hot water.

Kylie stepped out of the shower and dried her hair. She looked at herself in the mirror and was surprised to still know the person in the reflection. She had always imagined her first time to be so altering that she wouldn’t know her own face. She was glad to be wrong.

She wrapped the damp towel around her body, covering her sex, and headed back for the bedroom, feeling pretty good about herself. She found Leah laying under the covers, on one side of the bed, scrolling her phone. Leah glanced up from her screen and blew a kiss to Kylie, following it up with a whistle. She pulled the covers back from the empty side of the bed before patting it. Kylie closed the bedroom drawer and let the towel drop, nervous to be so exposed but more confident in herself having shared intimacy with her friend. She slid into the bed and lay her head on Leah’s chest.

“Leah?” “Yeah?”

“W-was I any good?”

“Why would you ask that?”

“Because I’ve never done anything like that before.”

“Then better than nothing is a great improvement. You shouldn’t worry about things like that, it’ll drive you crazy. Think of it like this, I loved it, and that’s all that should matter.”

“Do you love me?”

“As a friend? Or as something more?”

“Either.”

“Yes.” Leah said, putting her phone down to caress Kylie’s cheek. “I love you.”

“Can I ask you a question then?”

“You’ve been asking all sorts of questions. So, yeah, I think it’s okay to ask.”

“Can you put me in a diaper?”

“Why?”

“Because...I don’t want to have an accident in your bed and because...I want to be yours…”

“Mine?”

“Yours. I want to share this with you. I don’t know how to explain it so I’ll just spit it out. I don’t want to be a baby all the time. I don’t mind being a little girl if that’s what you want of me, but I want to be a woman too.”

“Okay…”

“At the same time, I want to be your baby. I want to give you that control over me. I want to share this secret with you. I want-I want you!”

“You already have me.”

“I want you not as someone who’s been hired to take care of me. I don’t want to be a job or a task. I want to be someone who’s loved and cared for, and taken care of should she need to be put in her place. I want you to be a part of my life like that. To know when I need to be a baby or when I need to be spanked. To be someone that I love and want to be with, not for the things she does to me, but for the person that she is.”

“And what makes you think that you don’t have that already?” Kylie raised her head and looked at Leah who smiled and kissed Kylie’s nose. “Slide over and I’ll get your diaper.”

Kylie moved to the side of the bed and lay on her back. She didn’t take her eyes off of Leah as she moved seductively around the room.

“I know how you feel.” Leah said, standing at Kylie’s feet. She unfolded the diaper and fluffed it with practiced ease. “I don’t want to think of you as a job. In the time we spent at college and the time I’ve spent with you recently, I’ve come to know you and care about you. You are an amazing girl, Kylie. You are brave and caring. You’ve gone on this great journey to find yourself and have come out stronger because of it. I envy that.” She said, “Lift up. Okay.

Now down. Shit, I forgot the powder. Stay there.”

She returned shortly with the powder, sprinkling it over Kylie’s diaper area. “You know what you want and you aren’t afraid to fight for it. And although this is definitely the weirdest way I’ve been asked out, it’s certainly the cutest.” She said, spreading the powder out with one hand. She tapped Kylie’s nose with a dusty finger. She secured the tapes and pushed the garment up tight between Kylie’s legs, making Kylie squirm. “And I accept. I will happily be your girlfriend slash caregiver slash disciplinarian!” She snapped her fingers and pointed to Kylie’s pillow. “Now get in your spot for bed young lady! It’s well past your bedtime!”

Kylie giggled and bounced into her spot. Leah walked back around the bed, shutting off the light as she did so. She rummaged for something before getting into the bed on her side. She was just getting comfortable when Kylie rolled over to face her, the crinkle of her diaper muffled slightly by the covers. Kylie wiggled closer and they kissed, with Kylie’s powdered nose rubbing off on Leah’s face.

“Guess I can’t call you my big sister anymore. Wouldn’t want things to sound weird.”

“No. I guess not.”

“What can I call you then?”

“Depends on the moment. You can use my name. Or you can think of something that you like. It’s up to you. I’m not your boss anymore. At least, not unless you misbehave.” “Oh, I plan on misbehaving.” Kylie said innocently.

“You still have a spanking coming. I don’t recommend pushing your luck.”

Kylie paused, staring at Leah’s dimly lit features. She was excited but hesitant. She wanted this to work but didn’t want to come off as overzealous. She rolled back over and was surprised when Leah pulled her closer, spooning her. She felt loved and cared for. And safe.

“Leah?”

“Hmm?”

“Is this too much? Am I being needy?”

“Shhh. Go to sleep. It’s late and I’m tired.”

“I just want you to let me know if I’m getting annoying.”

Leah sighed, rolling onto her back for a moment and fumbling for something. When she rolled back over, she pressed the cool nipple of a pacifier to Kylie’s lips. She lightly held it in place as Kylie sucked on it, finally getting the message, and falling quiet.

Leah removed her hand and wrapped it around Kylie’s tummy, holding her close. Kylie felt Leah’s lips on the back of her neck and a slight hug. “There. That’s better. That’s my good girl.”

The girl that fancied herself a woman, yet was dressed like a baby slept like her namesake, content in the arms of her lover. Leah listened to Kylie’s breathing and when it slowed and she was solidly asleep, she took the pacifier away and tucked it into her nightstand drawer. She didn’t expect her parents to barge in when they got home, but thought it best to keep Kylie’s tendencies out of their prying view.

Their dynamic had changed again, and instead of Kylie being subservient, Leah looked at her as an equal. She loved Kylie, as she was sure that Kylie loved her and deep down, this new arrangement was the best of both worlds for the two of them. There was bound to be bumps in the road as Kylie would still require diapers at night, whether she wanted them or not, but at least she was accepting of her need. The bigger hurdle would be how well she would be able to stay dry during the day. Leah wasn’t going to make her ask to use the potty unless there was some punishment involved. Kylie was ready to move on from the Institute and their influences, and it’s lasting impact on her would take time to get rid of.

I wonder what this all means for my job? We need to be able to support ourselves when she’s finally free from them. We don’t need to rush things and move in together immediately but not relying on our parents will be a good first start. I need to keep this job. I’ll talk it over with Donna in the morning. Maybe I can convince her that this is a training type thing. I can be like a sitter or something. Maybe we can both do it. Kylie’s on hand personal experience would be a huge leg up for being a sitter. She can relate to them in a way that I never will. Or could.

Unless…

Isabell had just finished all the preparations when the first knock came to her door. Her hair, which had finally reached her shoulders, had been dyed and straightened. She had gotten a manicure and pedicure, a flowing summer dress, and, thanks to a friend, her makeup done. It was exhausting, but worth it. She both looked and felt like a million dollars, and that was really the entire point. She gained so much confidence when she could look into the mirror and see the girl she always wanted to be. She needed that confidence because inside, she was a wreck. While she had Lori’s support and the support at the office, she still didn’t feel accepted. She felt as if she would always feel that way. Alien in her own skin. That’s why Lori had suggested a housewarming party. While the girls were sympathetic, the men at the office, and in general, looked at her with disgust.

She swung the door open for the first of her guests, some of the girls from the office. There were exclamations of how pretty they all looked and Isabell did a little spin to show off her dress and look. The positive reinforcement was encouraging and helped to keep her mood high. Within thirty minutes, most of the guests were there. Married couples, single friends, and more soon filled her small apartment. Among them were Lori, Donna, Lucy, Apple, and Mark. Leah and Kylie were the last to show, and much to her surprise, Kylie was a lot friendlier to her this time, complimenting her dress and eyeliner.

The party went very well, the table set up for gifts was covered with baskets and gift bags. The other table of snacks and drinks went over well and for the most part, everyone enjoyed themselves. As the party wound down and the guests started to leave, Isabell was finally able to breathe. She hadn’t sensed anyone having any animosity towards her and that made her feel great. Lori did her best to help, breaking ice and working her way around the crowd. As the last of the guests left, leaving Lori, Donna, and Mark and their respective charges loitering around, Isabell could finally breathe.

Breathe, and pee. The problem with being a hostess was that she had to be there for every guest. With only people she knew left in her apartment, she could finally slip away and tinkle. The girls were in the kitchen area, Lori and Apple were doing the dishes while Donna changed Lucy in the living room. Leah and Kylie were milling around the snack table, filling up on the fruit and veggie trays.

Isabell did her business. She was still getting used to sitting each time. The cage didn’t allow for standing. She flushed and straightened her dress out before checking her makeup.

She went to leave when she practically walked into the barrel sized chest of Mark.

“Rushing off somewhere?” He asked, his frame filling the doorway. Isabell was immediately on the defensive, backing away slowly.

“I...uh...have to go.”

“You already went, and by the looks of it, you still have some things to learn.”

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“C’mon. It’s easy to see. It’s obvious to everyone. Your flat chest and flat ass aren’t fooling anyone.” Mark stepped forward and reached out, grabbing Isabell’s chin. He ran his thumb across Isabell’s bottom lip. “You are just the kind of hopeless case that the Institute prides itself on fixing.”

“There’s nothing wrong with me. Now if you’ll excuse me.” Isabell pulled away from Mark’s grasp and slipped around him, heading for the door. In one swift motion, Mark turned around and, from behind, grabbed Isabell by the throat, pulling her back to him. He held her tight enough to mean business but not to hurt her.

“I don’t think so. A proper sissy doesn’t speak to a real man that way. But I’m guessing that you’re not fully trained, right? I mean, look at you, all dolled up for what?” Mark sneered, pushing the door closed with one hand and pushing Isabell towards the sink. It didn’t click fully closed. The porcelain hit her hips and she was bent over it slightly. She whimpered and pushed away from the wall but Mark’s large frame and power kept her from going anywhere.

“Look at yourself. Look at your sissy whore face!” He held her by the neck with one hand and held her gaze at the mirror with the other by her chin. “You know what you want. Those real women out there can never teach you the right ways, can they? Do you know what you need? A man. A real man. To show you what it’s like to be a sissy girl.” He slid his thumb across her lip again and her mouth instinctively opened. She could see his smile, even with him being a head taller than she was. He traced his thumb across her lip again and as it involuntarily opened, he slid his thumb into her mouth.

“That’s right. That’s a good sissy girl. She knows when to suck. The problem with real girls is they think they get to decide when and how they service a real man. Not a sissy. A sissy understands that her job is to please, not to think.”

Isabell watched his hand move from her neck down and out of sight. She felt his fingertips as they brushed against the back of her thigh, slowly moving up. He slid his hand under her dress, lifting it up until he reached her ass. He grabbed a handful of her cheek, squeezing and lifting, forcing Isabell to lean forward, taking more of his thumb in her mouth.

“Like that, don’t you? Used. Manhandled. I bet you’re locked away under this dress, aren’t you? Aren’t you?”

Isabell felt compelled to nod, knowing full well how it looked in the mirror, his thumb sliding in and out of her mouth. She could see the eye of someone looking through the crack in the door. She felt the rush of the exhibition and loved it.

“That’s what I thought. Do you know what you need to do?” Isabell shook her head.

“Before this night is through, you will bring me the key for your little sissy clit and I will take over teaching you how to properly service a man. Understood?” He reached around Isabell’s hips and brushed her plastic prison. He sneered at the damp spot on her panties.

Isabell didn’t nod in agreement, he made her nod. The watching eye moved away from the door and she couldn’t tell who it was.

“Good, now get out so I can take a leak.” He pulled his thumb out of her mouth and a string of drool dangled from it to her lip. She wiped it away and left the bathroom, flattening her dress out. Her head swarmed. His power. His presence. His command of both her body and his words. She shuddered to think what could have happened if they were alone in the apartment.

She quivered at the what ifs.

Back with her guests, the girls had cleaned the place up and they were all chatting amongst themselves. Isabell composed herself, unsure which of them had seen what transpired in the bathroom. Leah and Kylie were holding hands and sitting rather close to each other, not like caregiver and child, but more like close friends. Donna and Lori were sipping tea and chatting. Lucy and Apple were playing with some child toys on the floor. It was obvious to everyone in the room that Lucy was still in a diaper, but Kylie wasn’t. Something had changed with Kylie but Isabell didn’t have the room in her mind to figure it out. She still had to figure out if she was going to do as she was told. Giving Mark her key was a huge risk. She had heard many stories about how he was with the girls he took care of.

“Something wrong, Isabell?” Lori asked. Isabell hadn’t been paying attention and was standing in the hallway in a daze.

“N-no. Everything’s fine. I was just hoping that everyone enjoyed themselves.”

“I think so. The night was a huge success, don’t you think, girls?” Leah and Kylie nodded in unison. “Everything has been cleaned up so all you need to do is sit down and relax with us.”

“I...uh...wish I could, but you know how it is. Takes twenty minutes to get ready and three hours to get off.”

“I wouldn’t say three hours.” Kylie joked. She and Leah laughed and they got stern looks from Lori and Donna.

“I think that’s our cue to leave then.” Donna said. “Come, Lucy, let’s pick up our toys so we can leave.”

Lucy, with Apple’s help, did what she was told. Kylie and Leah went over to the door and Donna and Lori took care of their cups. When they returned, they could immediately feel the tension in the room. Mark had reappeared and was standing next to Apple. All of the young girls felt some form of animosity and Isabell was especially bothered. Lori and Donna scanned the room, looking for some sign, some truth on the faces of the young girls. There was nothing they could easily discern but Donna was particularly bothered. Whatever had happened was fresh in their minds and it didn’t bode well. She looked to Kylie for some sort of answer but found nothing. She looked to Apple and found the same stoicism she always carried on her face.

The girls filed out of the apartment, giving Isabell hugs as they went. She thanked each and every one of them for showing up and caring so much. She gave Lori the largest hug she could, thanking her repeatedly for showing her the path. She skipped over Mark, a deliberate action that Donna found curious. She couldn’t tell if it was because Isabell was in transition or if she didn’t like Mark at all. Either was plausible. One thing was for sure, one of the girls knew something, and it wasn’t good.

Part Fifteen: Resolve

Lucy Hernandez lay in her crib, living her best depressed life. Despite all of the craziness, her time in the program had gone by pretty uneventfully. She had forgotten most of the trauma in the beginning of her time with the Institute and she hadn’t really found her time in the pod to be that terrible. She didn’t remember it much. Everything she could recall was hazy at best, and she had emerged from it no worse for wear.

She had been carefully watching how Kylie was behaving and how she was growing out of the program by leaps and bounds. Kylie was ready to move on and yet Lucy found herself wanting to stick her heels in the mud. She didn’t want to return to the outside world. It was overbearing, judgemental, and cruel. Her parents only cared about their images and Lucy didn’t really feel a part of that. She knew her father loved her and her mother tolerated her, but their lives weren’t impacted by her presence or her absence.

That understanding had taken Lucy a while to get over. There were many nights where she would lay awake and feel the burning tears flow. She wasn’t really surprised, but it hurt nonetheless. She didn’t want to go home to that kind of atmosphere, but to that effect, she didn’t want to stay in Mark’s house either. She felt abandoned by her parents and unwelcome where she was. So she was stuck in place. She hadn’t progressed in her program and didn’t really care to. Staying a baby was the only way she felt cared about.

Behind her, Kylie stirred. She was still sleeping in a crib, still diapered, but Lucy knew that it wouldn’t last. Once she regained control of her bladder, she wouldn’t need to wear diapers to bed anymore and could move to a bed without bars. Lucy was convinced that Kylie was going to leave once she hit that milestone, which would leave Lucy alone and with no one to talk to about her feelings. She was losing time and had to act soon.

“Kylie?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Do you think there is a place out there for me?”

“Out there? Out where?”

“In the real world.”

“We are in the real world. I don’t remember falling through any interdimensional rift or something.”

“I mean outside of all of this. You know, the program.”

“What are you getting at?”

“You’ve been out there, you know, around other people, as…” Lucy was stuck on the words.

“As a baby? Or in diapers?”

“Both.”

“Well, you’ve been out there with me, and it wasn’t so bad.”

“It wasn’t super good either.”

“But it wasn’t terrible. We were teased or ridiculed or anything.”

“But we were looked at.”

“People look at other people all the time. It doesn’t mean anything.”

“How do you stand it though? Knowing that if they knew what was really going on, they wouldn’t see us the same way.”

“And their opinions matter why? I don’t mean to sound callous but if there is one thing I’ve learned during my time here is that the only opinions of me that I care about are of the people that love me. Everyone else can fuck off.”

“And that mentality works for you?”

“Has so far. I get it Lucy, I do. I used to be like you. Afraid of what everyone thought about me, afraid to stand up for myself, and afraid to be myself. You had it all in reverse. When I first met you, you were a badass bitch. You ruled the school and treated everyone around you like they were dirt. Do you remember that? You and your friends locked me in the boy’s locker room in my underwear and I peed my pants. I hated you ever since and when you and your new friends trapped me in that bathroom and videoed me in a pull up, I thought that I could never forgive you. But you know something, I was wrong. I judged you without knowing you. I hated you for your actions because they directly affected me, but I didn’t take into consideration that you were just like me, only acting out in a different way.

“And then there was Penny. I could have said that you got what you deserved. That the torment she put you through was karma for what you did to me, but that’s not who I am. I am not vindictive and cruel. I may have hated you, but I wouldn’t wish that treatment on anyone. Instead, I got to know you. Got to see the fine heart you have and how scared and vulnerable you were. I didn’t care that you used to be my enemy. In here, behind these bars, you and I are the same.

“I love you, Lucy, for being a friend to me when I needed you. I was alone, just like you, and because of some weird twist of fate, we ended up as babies together. I know what you are asking. I think I’ve always known since we first met at Donna’s. You want to stay here. You want to stay a baby, specifically, you want to stay Donna’s baby. And I will always support you in that choice. You need her and if you didn’t know already, she needs you.”

Lucy was silent. She was looking through the crib bars at Kylie, who was sitting cross legged in her crib. The cribs were far enough apart that they couldn’t touch each other, but they felt connected.

“You wouldn’t mind?”

“Why would I mind? I love what Donna has done for me and she will always be a Mommy to me, but my time here is almost over. I’ve made peace with my past and I’ve grown to accept the person that I am. I’m in love and I’m happy. But my happiness should in no way interfere with yours. If I can repay you for your compassion, I will make sure that you can stay with Donna forever.”

“You don’t need to pay me back for being your friend. We made a pinky promise to put all of that behind us.”

“And that’s what you need to do. Put it behind you. Not the crib or the diapers or the mentality, but that old life you had that made you so miserable. I can promise you that Donna will love and care for you. I can promise that she will do everything in her power to ensure your happiness. If that’s what you want.”

“I...I do. I want that.”

“Then leave it to me. But I need you to make me a promise.”

“A pinky promise?”

“Yes, a pinky promise. I need you to promise me that you will never look back on your old like and miss it. You are no longer that person. You are someone better. Smarter. Stronger. And certainly cuter.”

“Cuter?”

“Maybe I’m biased because I’ve recently figured out that I’m into girls. Or, just maybe, you look super cute in a diaper!”

Lucy smiled. “You always seem to know how to cheer me up.”

“It’s a gift I didn’t know I had.”

“Thanks Kylie. You are a true friend and I’m glad I got to get to know you.”

“Hey, think of it this way. Had you not taken that video of me, you wouldn’t have ever found out you like to wear diapers.”

Lucy paused, realizing that she was wetting her diaper as they talked. It was a strange feeling. Not peeing, she was used to that. But with her body not waiting until it was a necessity. She was slowly getting there with messing too. It was harder to let go on and it was something she was putting a lot of thought into. If she went down the road she was heading on, there was no going back. Both Penny and Donna had told her that the reason the program is loosely time based was because retraining the muscles needed to reverse bowel incontinence was difficult, if not impossible. Things could be done to help the situation but there were no guarantees. She could end up in diapers for the rest of her life, whether she enjoyed them or not.

Thankfully, Lucy enjoyed them. She couldn’t explain it to anyone but Kylie, as she was the only one who could understand, but she enjoyed them. The softness. The reassuring bulk between her legs. The smell of the powder and the refreshing feel of the wipes against her skin. She enjoyed the colorful designs and the crisp crinkles. She liked the warmth they retained when she used them. She liked how proud Mommy Donna was when she used them fully and how it felt to lay in Donna’s arms when being breastfed and having her butt patted. It was soothing and it made her want the attention even more. Her mother had always been so cold and callous towards her that she ached for that kind of attention.

She had been asking herself since they got out of the pods if being a baby was something she could do for the rest of her life. She needed the love and care that Donna offered. She felt as if she would suffocate without it. If she couldn’t be Donna’s baby, then she had no reason to be around anymore. She wondered if she had some sort of mental illness.

“Get out of your head, Lucy. Don’t chase that rabbit.”

“I’m sorry.” She replied, “It’s hard when you don’t feel wanted.”

“It happens, but you can’t dwell on the what ifs. And you are wanted. I want you to be my little baby sister. I want you in my life. You can come over and stay in my crib for sleepovers.”

“You have a crib?”

“Yeah. It’s been so long since we talked that I haven’t had a chance to tell you. Leah took me to see my mom and she remodeled my room into a nursery. I have a crib just like this one. A little nicer of course but that’s not the point. The point is, I’m not going anywhere. I know when Leah comes to get me today, she will have me wear a pull up instead of a diaper, but the reality is, I’m still a baby. This part of me is not going anywhere anytime soon. I won’t let it. I may not want to wear them all of the time, but they will always have a place in my life.

“Just like you. You will always have a place in my life. It won’t matter if you stay with

Donna or not, I will still want you in my life.”

“Awww! You are so sweet!”

The door at the top of the stairs opened and they heard Donna’s telltale footfalls descending the stairs. Kylie shot a quick look at Lucy. A look. A promise. Lucy nodded and smiled, sticking her thumb in her mouth. It was time for her to be a baby again.

“Morning girls!” Donna said.

“Morning Mommy!” Lucy and Kylie said.

“How are we today?”

“Good!” They replied in unison. Lucy’s speech was a bit muffled as she was trying to talk around her thumb.

“That’s great. Let’s get you changed, Lucy, and you can go upstairs to play. Breakfast is almost ready.”

“Otay, Mommy!”

Donna changed Lucy with minimal effort. She dressed her in a onesie just to keep everything tight to her body and sent her on her way. Lucy looked back at Kylie as she crawled up the stairs and Kylie gave her a quick smile. Donna had her back to them as she was discarding Lucy’s used diaper and getting a fresh one out for Kylie. Lucy didn’t linger though, as she knew that Kylie had an opportune time to talk to Donna and needed the space.

“Well, now. It’s been quite a journey for us, hasn’t it?” Donna asked as she lowered the bars to Kylie’s crib. “Seems like just yesterday I was putting you in your first diaper.” “A lot has happened since then.” Kylie said.

Donna stood at the side of the crib, setting the diaper to the side. Kylie was still sitting in the middle of the mattress.

“I see that you have things on your mind.”

“I do.”

“I’m always here to listen.”

“I know.” Kylie said, stretching. “I need to ask you a question.”

“Okay. Do you want me to change you?”

“Not yet. I want your full attention.”

Donna paused. “I’ve always given you my full attention.”

“Do you still want a baby of your own?”

Donna was put off by the abruptness of the question. Kylie had grown into a sharp witted girl who wasn’t going to sugar coat things anymore.

“Of course I do. But you already knew that. So, what’s this about?”

“Lucy. But I think you knew that already.”

“What about Lucy?” Donna was being dodgy on purpose. While she wanted to have this conversation at some point, she wanted to have it with Lucy, and not with Kylie.

Kylie’s face turned to a scowl. “Fine. You don’t want to be honest with me, then we are done talking. I’ll wait for Leah to change me, thanks.”

“Kylie, I-”

“Raise the bars, Donna.”

Donna sighed. She grabbed the diaper and raised the bars back up, closing Kylie in the crib with a click. Kylie turned around so she couldn’t see Donna. It was the cold shoulder and the silent treatment. Donna put the diaper away and lowered the bars on Lucy’s crib, the side closest to Kylie. She sat in the crib and after a moment of thought, relented.

“I’m hesitant to offer Lucy a permanent place in my home. As a baby or otherwise.”

Without turning around, Kylie engaged. “Why?”

“I had a little once. And like the two of you, she really took to being a little. Accepting the program and finding her own true desires, she wanted to stay my little. So, I made her an offer and for a while, things went well. But as time went by and we got more and more social with friends and family, the burden of being a little got to be too much for her and she wanted out. There isn’t a protocol for this sort of thing and she had spent so much time as a little that there wasn’t really any way she could go back. She had been in my care for over a year and was fully incontinent at that point.

“But...her mind was made up and there was nothing I could do to stop her. I couldn’t force her to stay with me and I bargained with her as best as I could, but in the end, she ended up hating me for what I had done to her. She sued the Institute for a large settlement, drug my name through the mud, and ultimately, broke my heart. I loved her like she was my own flesh and blood, much like I love you and Lucy.

“That’s why I’m so hesitant. I can’t handle that kind of heartbreak again. I care too much for each person I help to risk that lever of hurt again. I know Lucy doesn’t want to go home and I know that she hasn’t made any progress in the program because she doesn’t want to. I’m at a

loss as to what to do about it. Part of me thinks I should do what Mark and Penny would do and force her forward but that’s not the kind of caregiver I am. I want her to be happy, just like I want you to be happy, so I have to keep my distance so that I don’t cross the line between doing my job and loving my girls.”

“Your happiness matters too, Donna. You know that right?”

“Not really. I’m doing a job, nothing more. I have to keep it professional.”

“But you aren’t. You haven’t for quite some time. The reason that you let us call you Mommy is because you have already crossed that line between professionalism and familial understanding. You love us and treat us like we are your children. You can deny it all you want but you hate to see each of us go.”

“I do. But for the sake of my career-”

“Is your career more important than your heart?”

Donna closed her eyes and sighed. Kylie wasn’t saying anything that she hadn’t already tried to rationalize. “No.” She finally said. “My career isn’t more important.”

“Then why are you using it as a shield?”

“Because I don’t want to get hurt again.”

“But you don’t mind if Lucy gets hurt? She needs you and can’t finish the program without you.”

“I do mind. I don’t want her to get hurt at all, but-”

“But what? You can’t sit there and tell me that you are not the perfect Mommy for her and that you aren’t the best qualified to take care of her. I don’t buy it.”

“Kylie, I-”

“You’re making excuses. And I get it. You don’t want to get hurt. I understand that. But if my time with you has taught me anything is that you have to put yourself out there. Life is too short to hide your feelings.”

Kylie was right. Donna almost hated to admit it, but she was right. She had preached self confidence and standing up for what was right, even in small moments. She put great emphasis on personal happiness and when it was thrown back in her face, it rendered her speechless. She hated the thought of being a hypocrite and her stance was exactly that, hypocritical. Taking Lucy in was the clear and obvious choice, for both of them and her fear over being hurt was rationally irrational. Lucy made her happy and she made Lucy happy. For her to take that happiness away from both of them was selfish and nonsensical.

“Y-your right.” Donna finally said. Kylie turned around and faced Donna. The older woman was turning the fresh diaper over and over in her hands.

“This isn’t about being right. This is about what’s best for the both of you. And this may not be it. I can’t say for sure, but I know that it’s definitely worth a shot. It’s better to have loved and lost than never loved before.”

“Using poetry against me now?”

“I was taking an English literature class before I left college and Lord Tennyson stood out to me.”

“Not Oscar Wilde?”

“I didn’t really pay that much attention. Kinda too busy being stressed out about wetting myself.”

“Fair enough. Do you want me to change you now?”

“No. Leah wanted me in it, she will take me out of it. I just want you to do what’s right by

Lucy.”

“You're more pushy than I remember.”

“I guess that I’m all grown up.”

“I guess you are. I put your discharge papers in the other day. Once cleared, you are free to leave.”

Kylie sighed. “So much for the pomp and circumstance.”

“Anticlimactic isn’t it?”

“I’m sure there will be a lot of climaxes in my future.”

Donna paused. She didn’t know if she should comment or not. There was a hard line at mixing sexual gratification and diapers from an Institute perspective but Kylie had moved beyond the need for the Institute.

“You really have grown up on me haven’t you?” Donna said with sadness in her voice.

Kylie got up on her knees at the edge of her crib, reaching through the bars to Donna. “I still love you, Mommy.”

“I love you too, Kylie. You’ve given me a lot of joy this past year.”

“You’ve changed me too, and not just literally.” Kylie said, with a smile. “I’m a better, stronger person because of you.”

“Not because of me, but with my help. You did this on your own. I simply pointed you in the right direction and gave you the tools to help yourself.”

“Who knew a pacifier was a healing tool?”

“I did. It’s kind of my thing.”

Kylie’s smile grew larger. “I can’t begin to tell you how much I appreciate it. And she will too.”

“We will see.” Donna said, unlocking Kylie’s crib. “Leah should be here soon. You can get down and play.”

“Can you change me, then? Once more, for old time’s sake?”

Donna beamed. “Of course I can, sweetie.”

Kylie bounded over to the edge of the crib and flopped onto her back, wiggling her legs over the edge. She spread her legs so that Donna could undo the snaps of her onesie. Upstairs, they heard the thumping sounds of excited feet. Lucy was clearly excited about something.

It didn’t take long for the thumps to get closer and Leah’s tennis shoes to appear at the top of the steps. They descended slowly to reveal the freshly shaven and oiled legs, bare up to the hemline of the skirt she wore. It was a schoolgirl skirt, pleated, and white and black. The hemline started at the middle of Leah’s thighs and the skirt went up over her hips. The white polo shirt accented it perfectly and slung over her shoulder was a clothing carrier bag.

“I guess now is as good a time as ever to mention the surprise, huh?” She said, seeing Donna in the middle of changing Kylie. “You were supposed to wait until I got here.” She said to Kylie.

“She asked me to.” Donna said. “For old time’s sake.”

“Old time, huh? Well, I guess that is a good enough excuse, but this is the last time young lady!” Leah said, playfully stern.

“Sorry Leah.” Kylie said meekly. “So what’s the surprise?”

“That’s for me to know and you to not. Donna, can I talk to you in private?”

“After I finish with her.” Donna said, sliding the fresh diaper under Kylie’s bottom.

“She can wait, it’s kind of important.”

“More important tha-”

“Yes.” Leah interrupted. “Stay put and don’t pee all over everything.” She said to Kylie.

Donna and Leah moved over out of earshot of Kylie, who laid there with her diaper undone and her parts exposed. They stood off in the corner and Leah was whispering something rather frantically, waving her hand about towards the direction of Kylie. Donna seemed to ask the same question over and over again but finally relented as if convinced that Leah was certain of something.

Donna came back over to where Kylie was and continued with the diaper change. Leah was loitering around the cabinet of supplies. Donna helped Kylie change her onesie and then brought the clothing bag over. She unzipped it and pulled out the outfit. Kylie’s eyes lit up when she saw it. Like Leah, she was going to wear a schoolgirl outfit, this one reminiscent of the Japanese school girls with a blue skirt, white top, and red bow. She hurriedly pulled the top over her head and stepped into the skirt that Donna held open for her. It fit perfectly and she felt more girly than she had in months. She forgot about everything else as she ecstatically ran up the stairs to show Sarah and Lucy.

“That was easy enough.” Donna said. “She forgot the tights and shoes.”

“She should be busy enough for a moment.” Leah said. Donna turned around to see that Leah had stopped loitering and was standing nearby.

“Are you sure about this?” Donna asked.

“I am. I don’t know of any other way to get the experience I need to build off of.” Leah pulled her hand from behind her back and produced the puppy print diaper she had chosen.

“As you wish. Take your panties off and hop up into the crib.” Donna said. Leah complied and was surprised to feel her hands trembling. She had thought long and hard about this decision and hadn’t found a better way to fully understand what Kylie went through. The closest she could come would be to put herself in Kylie’s place and experience it for herself. She hiked up her skirt and slid her bare bottom into the crib. Donna gently pushed on her shoulders, getting her to lay back. She was nervous and felt vulnerable and exposed. It put her on edge but, strangely, she felt calmed by the situation. Her skirt had fallen down her legs and Donna gently flipped it up, revealing her.

“You’re trembling.” Donna said.

“I’m a little scared.” Leah said, staring straight up at the ceiling.

Donna rested her hands on Leah’s knees. They were clamped together and she let her gentle touch have a calming effect. “Why are you scared?”

“I...I don’t really know.”

“Well, you should know that this is happening whether you like it or not. That was the deal.”

“I know. I’m just feeling vulnerable right now.”

“Do you still want to go through with this? I don’t want to force you into something you aren’t certain about.”

“That’s the point though, to know what she goes through, I need you to force me.”

“As you wish.” Her calming hands turned invasive, pushing Leah’s knees apart. Leah thought about some of the guys she’d been with and how forceful they were to get in her pants. This felt similar but instead of fear and dread, there was a tinge of excitement. Her heart pounded as she heard Donna unfold and fluff the diaper. She lifted her hips on command and expected pain or discomfort but the garment was soft and inviting. It crinkled as she lowered her hips onto it. She felt the dusting of the powder fall lightly onto her skin. It was a strange feeling. Like a dry liquid flowing down the seat and between her cheeks. She heard Donna shut the bottle of powder and set it down. She twitched at Donna’s touch as the older woman spread the powder around her private area.

“Talk to me.” Leah said, feeling helpless.

“And say what? Usually I’m putting diapers on girls that need them. You clearly don’t need them, but you want them, don’t you? Don’t you?” She used that condescendingly stern voice Leah had heard time and time again.

“Uh huh.” Leah said softly.

“That’s what I thought.” Donna said with a sneer. She pulled the diaper up between Leah’s legs. It was too much for Leah and she sat up, pushing Donna’s hands away.

“I can’t do this. I-I can’t.”

“You should have thought about that when I offered you a way out.” Donna said, pushing Leah back down. “Lay still and stop fussing before I put you over my knee and give you the full treatment.” Leah whimpered, partially out of fear, partially out of a confusing excitement. “You can’t whine your way out of this young lady and you can consider yourself with one strike.” Donna said, holding it down while she taped it closed. It was weird to have something far thicker between her legs. She had been so used to pull ups that a real diaper was a jarring difference.

“There. All better now.” Donna said, helping Leah stand. She undid and adjusted Leah’s skirt, pulling it down so that the waistband of the diaper rode above it. After pulling the shirt down to where it should rest, the diaper couldn’t be seen. It was felt though. Her legs were farther apart and as she took a few steps, and it settled, it rested fairly comfortably there. She could feel it adjust and move across her butt and after a quick glance, the added bulk was apparent. The skirt barely hung low enough to cover it as she walked and Leah knew that she would have to be conscious of it when she sat down, bent over, or reached anything above her head.

“Now, one quick reminder. You are not allowed to take it off or touch it in any way. You will use it for its intended purpose and I will change you as I see fit. Remember that you wanted this and I will not allow you to take any shortcuts. Am I understood?”

Leah looked herself over and let the gravity of Donna’s words sink in. Use if for its intended purpose? She knew what it meant but hadn’t realized that she would be in it long enough for it to be needed. She didn’t know if she would be able to but she was left with no choice.

“I’ll take that as a yes. Put your tights and shoes on while I pack a diaper bag for you three. First one, then two, now three. Gonna need to pack far more diapers. What? You don’t like that idea? Too bad. This is what you wanted and this is what you will get.”

Donna fell quiet and went about her business, packing a bag with a half dozen or more diapers. She could barely get it zipped closed after the powder and wipes. She looked over at Leah who had finished getting dressed and was standing there with her toes pointed at each other, clearly feeling vulnerable and with a tinge of regret in her eyes.

“Are you okay?” Donna asked.

“Y-yeah. That was...intense.” Leah replied. “I had no idea that I would feel that way about being put in one.”

“It happens to pretty much everyone. It’s one thing to wear one on your own, because you are making that choice. It’s something else entirely when that choice is taken away from you.”

“So this is what Kylie feels every time I make her wear one.”

“More or less.”

“Interesting. Can you do me a favor? Don’t tell Kylie. I want her to figure it out on herself.”

“I won’t say a word. Are you ready?”

“Yeah. So, do I call you Mommy or Donna or what?”

“Donna is fine. This is just for today.”

“Okay.” Leah said. “It’s kind of weird walking around in one.”

“You will get used to it. We are heading to the zoo and aquarium today, so you will have plenty of time to get used to it. Let’s rally up the girls and get on the road.”

“Sounds good.” Leah crinkled when she walked. Hindsight told her that she should have worn jeans instead of a schoolgirl outfit. Too little, too late, she supposed.

Kylie and Lucy were ready, each wearing a schoolgirl outfit of their own, but not looking alike. Kylie had her thigh high tights and Mary Jane shoes on, while Lucy’s tights went up over her diaper. Apple had thoughtfully packed a bag of drinks and before Kylie could assess the situation between Leah and Donna, they headed for the door. Three girls, one Mommy, and a day full of whimsical adventure awaited them.

Sarah watched the van pull out of the driveway and head out of sight. They would be gone all day and she had plenty of time to herself. That’s all she ever had to herself. Time and chores. Time for her chores, and chores for her time.

With all of this time, she had the opportunity to plan. She couldn’t stand to be under Mark’s thumb much longer and the more time she spent aware of everything he had done to her, the worse it got. She had worked things out slowly, if only to make sure that she wasn’t discovered or her plan revealed too soon. She knew his routines and habits and without a girl like Tonya or Carmen to slake his thirsts, she knew that he would be wanting her to fill their shoes. She was numb to it after all of these years, no matter how rough he was, the pain was temporary. It was why he turned his attention to the girls in his care all of those years ago. He had nothing further to threaten her with and without that fear and intimidation, he had lost his power over her. He still tried but she would just lay there motionless and hide her tears. It was that coldness that allowed her to wear two faces. It allowed her to be Sarah and still remain Apple.

While her plan relied heavily on Donna turning the other way, Sarah was still cautious. Should Donna have a change of heart, all plans would go out the window. Sarah waited for at least half an hour before checking. Donna had been lax on the safety of the briefcase for weeks now, leaving it on her dresser and unlocked. Sarah had made periodic checks on its condition whenever Donna was away and like then, today was no different. The case was unlocked and as she opened it, all the syringes of the paralytic cocktail were present and accounted for. She pulled one syringe out and turned it over and over in her hand.

It wasn’t fear that gripped her in that moment, but uncertainty. She didn’t know if one would be enough to bring him down to her level. She also didn’t know if two would kill him. She knew that she couldn’t enact her vengeance on a corpse. She also knew that she would only have one chance to turn the tide in her favor. What would be the price of her salvation? How far would she be willing to go?

As far as she needed to. That was her resolve, iron clad and unbreakable. He had broken her will years ago but couldn’t break her spirit. She would wait until the opportune moment and then she would strike.

The drugs were only a part of her plan. She busied herself around the house, doing her chores while she thought out the rest of it. The lock on the cage under the bed had been jimmied. Over the span of weeks she had used an eye dropper to drip grape jelly into the tumblers of the lock. Not a lot at once, just a drop here and there to gum up the lock. She made sure to leave no trace of her activities and as she suspected, there was a payoff. Last week, he had gone to lock her under the bed when the lock wouldn’t close all the way. He tried blowing it out and oiling it but nothing would work. He made some comment about how it didn’t serve any point anymore and threw it away.

There was one last thing she needed to enact her plan. Opportunity. With her chores finished, she sent him a text asking if she could bathe. She followed her question up with a picture of the outfit she wanted to wear, a saucy, red dress, custom made to her frame. It accented all of the right parts of her. She followed that with the comment of not wearing any underwear and had him wrapped around her finger.

She bathed. Shaving everything from her ankles to her armpits. She wanted to be smooth and soft, her most feminine, and ripe for the taking. As much as she loathed what she was setting herself up for, she took pride in knowing that for this last time, she was going to be in complete control.

She lotioned her skin once dry and walked around the house naked, letting the weight of imprisonment kiss her flesh once more. The sights were all the same and the scars she bore now a reminder of the courage she finally possessed. She adorned her body with the marks of her slavery. Makeup, nail and toe polish, perfume. These were the symbols of her subjugation to him and the face of her past. She would wear them with pride, this one last time, and finally be free.

She had dinner in the oven by the time he got home. There would be an hour or so left for it to cook, leaving her plenty of time. Her anticipation and nerves ramped up the closer it got to him coming home. Everything was in place and provided that he kept to his routine, it would be done and over with by the time dinner was done.

He came home with expected zealotry. As was usual with him, the pictures and texts were enough to have him obsessing over her all afternoon. He quickly dealt with his briefcase and jacket before coming up behind her and running his hands from the back of her knees up to her shoulders, lifting her dress along the way and solidifying his assumptions about her clothing. She was, as promised, naked underneath and he was suitably aroused by it, pressing himself into her. He stood over a foot taller than her and his hips were roughly in the small of her back.

She could feel him twitching through their clothes and a small smile flashed across her face.

She had him just as she wanted him.

His hands circled around her shoulders and across her chest, cupping her breasts, and squeezing. She moaned as he massaged her nipples. Despite everything he had put her through, he still knew how to authentically please her.

One of his hands slid up to her throat and he grabbed her gently. She responded by leaning slightly into his grip and raising herself up on her tiptoes to place his twitching body part between her cheeks. She lowered and raised a few times, rubbing herself against him. He moved a hand down between her legs, still over the dress, and played with her. She moaned louder and reached her hands up over her head to interlace her fingers behind his neck.

The show was working and he was buying into all of it. He raised up the back of her dress as he bent her forward. Her fingers pulled apart as her hands slammed down on the table in front of her. He flipped her dress up onto her back and with his feet, he spread her legs. He kept his feet inside her stance, keeping her from closing her legs. This was his go to move and he had plenty of practice with it. What he didn’t have, however, was her cunning.

“Not yet, sir. I haven’t had a chance to make my lips all poofy.” Poofy. The term used when her lips were swollen from various activities, but the main being delivering oral pleasure.

“Mmmmm.” Mark said. He was a man and men were always easy to manipulate in this manner. The temptation was too much for him to resist and he stepped back from her. Her face was hidden by her hair and if he had noticed, he would have seen the devilish smile across her face. He left her folded over the table and went to his chair. It was his preferred space for such activities. She stayed put, exposed and within sight of him, bent over the table. She could feel his eyes on her with his every step. It made her feel slutty and dirty but she had to keep her feelings to herself. He could easily pick up on her mood and if she was hiding something from him, he could tell.

She heard the creak of his chair as he sat in it, signalling her time to act. She slid off the table and onto all fours. She crawled to him, seductively swinging her hips from side to side as she did. Her low cut dress allowed an easy view of her breasts as they practically hung out. She licked her lips in a teasing manner as well, laying it on thick for him.

When she got to his chair, she stayed on her knees but raised herself up to get closer to him. He kept his hands to himself and let her work. They had done this numerous times before and as part of the job, she had to do all the work herself. She started with his belt, pulling it apart slowly. She undid his pants and reached into his boxers. Her eyes never left his as she freed him. His arousal was immediate and he did slide his clothes down a bit to give himself more freedom.

She licked her lips seductively again, slowly moving her tongue from one corner, across her upper lip to the other side, and back across her bottom lip. While her tongue moved, her hands pulled her hair into a ponytail. She held the bundle of her hair and tilted her head down, offering the makeshift handle to him. It was her submission, something that they had worked on throughout their years together. She had to give herself to him to be used. Every part of her life was a willing submission to him and this was no different.

He took a hold of her hair and she immediately crossed her hands behind her back. She wasn’t allowed to touch him with her hands. Everything had to be done with her mouth, which he wasted no time filling. With his hand controlling her head, the most she could do was bear the brunt of him. As was normal, he was overly excited at the start and eager to prove his dominance. The normally quiet house was filled with the sounds of gagging and choking as he tried to cram all of himself down her throat. Her eyes never moved from being locked on his as he used her as brutally as he could from a sitting position. While it was rough, it was the norm and before long, he stopped being forceful, leaving her a drool covered, tear streaked, blubbering mess.

This was only the beginning. He had exerted his dominance on her and she still had to please him willingly. He only left her mouth when he was being nice enough to let her catch her breath, but now, with his hand merely holding her hair and not directing, she was able to catch her breath by licking him up and down each side. She then took him back into her mouth and did what she wanted to do.

His increased breathing and slight pressure on the back of her head told her she was doing exactly what she needed to do. It wouldn’t be long and she would be able to bring him to climax but she had other ideas in mind. With control in her hands, she could tease him with something greater.

“I’ve been a bad, bad girl, Sir.” She said between attempts at deepthroating.

“A bad girl, huh?”

“Uh huh.”

“How so?”

It had taken her ages to bring herself to properly answer that question. There was something that she hated doing, but was a guarantee to make him putty in her hands. She had been working on this secret weapon for years, slowly taking something that she hated and turning it into a weapon she could use against him.

“I’ve had some...dirty thoughts.” More code words, but cleverly chosen and barely used to maximise their impact. She rarely implicated her intentions and when she did, it was usually to get something she wanted later down the road. Willing submission was his demand and the greater the submission, the more she was able to manipulate his emotions. The trick was getting him to fall for it.

“Dirty thoughts, huh? Come up here and tell me about it.”

Bingo. She smiled inside but calmly took him into her mouth one last time, going as far as to push her nose into his body. She held herself there for as long as she could and came up with a gasp. She then crawled up on him, lifting her dress up, and settling in place. She slowly worked her hips in a small circle, keeping him focused on his pleasure and less on her deception.

“It’s just that...with all the girls that have come and gone...there hasn’t been a lot of time for you. I’ve been busy doing chores and being a good girl.” She said, keeping her voice innocent and childlike, like she was apologizing for something. “But I can do better. I can be better and I don’t want you to be mad at me. I’ve been thinking all day about how I can make it up to you and that led me to...dirty thoughts…”

His hands fell on her hips, merely to enjoy her movements and not direct. “You have been slacking in that area. You keep a clean house, little girl, but your duties are more than just a servant.”

“I know, Sir, and I’m sorry. I want to make it up to you, I really do!” She said in a pleading tone. He was close to being blinded by her. To seal the deal, she pulled the dress up over her head and tossed it aside, leaning forward and resting her head on his shoulder, and moving his hands from her hips to her ass. “Take me to the bedroom, Sir, and have your way with me.” She said and then, with a whisper in his ear, “I need it.”

The deal was sealed. He clenched her by her cheeks and with a show of his strength, he quickly stood up, carrying her, and not losing his place inside her. She gasped in shock and clenched onto him, keeping up the visage of being weak and helpless. He carried her to the bedroom, lifting her up and down with each step, using her.

In the bedroom, he lifted her off him and flopped her onto the bed. She squeaked in surprise, a reaction that she didn’t normally have. He looked at her for a moment but she rolled over on all fours and offered herself to him. He put his suspicions out of his mind and grabbed her by the hips as he stood behind her.

The pain was nearly crippling. His size and ferocity made her cry out but she quickly stifled it as he pushed her head down into the blankets. He was going to use her and he wasn’t going to be nice about it. She had to be punished for her imagined slights and he was happy to oblige.

When he was done, some time later, her tears were both physical and emotional. She hurt in ways that no one should hurt and as she lay in the cage under the bed, with him snoring above her, she felt confident that it would be the last time she hurt that way. She waited until he was deep asleep before she put the last part of her plan into action. From under her pillow, she pulled two syringes that she had taken from Donna’s case. She hoped that she would be fast enough to get at least one full injection into him before he woke up.

She stood above him, a syringe in each hand, primed and ready. She looked at his face and choked back the rage she had as the memories flooded through her. She held her thumbs over the plungers. The rage and the pain she felt as well as the humiliation of what she had subjected herself was overwhelming and in one quick break of her composure, as the tears fell from her eyes and the years of torment and abuse tore her soul, she stabbed both syringes into his leg and as his eyes snapped open, focusing on hers, she compressed the plungers as hard as she could.

She didn’t see the backhand coming and when it hit, it knocked her off her feet. He rose from the bed, reaching for her in pure, blinding rage. She scrambled back as he stepped towards her, hand outstretched, inches from her neck, when a confused look came over his face. He looked down at the needles sticking out of his leg and tried to bat them aside, his movements becoming slow and labored. He looked back at her and with a cold realization of what she had done dawning on his addled brain, he roared and charged her, taking two steps before his legs turned to jelly and he crumpled to the floor, paralysed. He tried to burn a hole through her with his glare but it was ineffective. The drugs had worked far faster than she had anticipated and he was a pile of dead weight. His eyes widened as the yellow puddle beneath him grew wider. She took a moment to revel in her success, staring coldly into his eyes.

“I suppose you're wondering where it all went wrong.” Sarah said, the last remnants of Apple fading away with his bowel control.

“You didn’t honestly think you could keep me as your slave forever, did you?” She smirked. “How fortuitous that the very people sent here for your help would be the ones to free me. Can I ask you something? Do you have any idea what it feels like to suddenly remember your real name and the life you had before all of this? Can you even fathom what that’s like? Let me give you a small clue, because even I can’t put into words exactly how I felt. Robbed would be the best word. You stole years of my life from me so that I could be this doll in your house that you would use and abuse.

“I hate you. You know that right? With every fiber of my being, I hate you. And I hate myself. I hate this body that I have to live in, knowing what you’ve done to it. I hate every breath I have to take to sustain the life you created for me. And all I want to do is cause you every ounce of pain that you’ve caused me. I want to take that case of needles from the other room and inject them all into you, causing you to die, most likely, or at the very least, be permanently paralysed from the eyes down so that you can feel even a sliver of the torture that you’ve put me through.

“But I won’t. Not all at once. See, I’ve had my eyes opened. You are a symptom to a greater problem, and if it’s the last thing I do, I will make sure that you, Moira, and this whole fucking Institute burns to the ground. It won’t be today. It won’t be tomorrow. But I want you to know and I want you to tell her that her day of reckoning is coming. Even if it kills me, I will make all of you pay!”

Sarah Walker stood up and for a moment, thought about sodomizing him like he had done to her. She slowly got dressed in front of him and left him in his filth. She retrieved the case from Donna’s room, the only thing in that house of value. She sent one text message and then smashed the phone to bits on the kitchen counter. With him in a vegatative state for an indeterminate amount of time, she had to act fast. She grabbed her purse, her keys, and her bank card. She would have to be on the run for a while but she needed money and there was an ATM not far from the pharmacy where she would ditch the car.

She stepped out into the free air and breathed a sigh of relief. While her future was uncertain, her resolve to be her own person had never been stronger. And with a squeal of the tires, Sarah Walker disappeared into the ether.

Part Sixteen: New Beginning's

The zoo was spectacular. Kylie hadn’t been there in ages, not since a school field trip and it was exciting to see it through older eyes. The animals were all out in force and with her mindset, she felt like a young girl again, seeing the wonder and majesty for the first time. The exhibits weren’t the only things she saw for the first time.

There was something off about Leah. The way she carried herself was the first indicator. Where she had a confident strut before, she was more reserved and cautious, taking extra time to make each movement, which exacerbated Kylie’s suspicions. Leah was also looking around a lot, and not just because the exhibits were spectacular. She was constantly adjusting her skirt to make sure it hung as low as it could.

Kylie didn’t have time to put a lot of thought behind it. The exhibits were so engrossing that the three young girls lost all track of time as they went from animal to animal. While Kylie got distracted by the sights, Lucy, however, had picked up on Kylie’s suspicions and was watching Leah with great amusement. She figured out what was bothering Leah in a short amount of time and the longer they were at the zoo, the more comical it got as the bottles of water added more pressure to the situation. When Kylie was distracted by a curious giraffe, Lucy crept up to Leah’s side with a smirk on her face.

“Pop your cherry yet?”

Leah choked on her slice of pizza. “Excuse me?!”

“Don’t be indignant. I may like pretending to be a baby, but I’m not an idiot. You’re wearing a diaper. So, are you wet yet?”

“I don’t know what you are talking about!”

“Do I need to lift your skirt in front of all of these people to prove my point?”

Leah looked at Lucy with a death stare. “Don’t you dare!”

“Then stop being a brat about it. Kylie may not have figured it out, but I have. So, what’s the deal?”

“Tch. Fine. But you keep your mouth shut about this or so help me!”

“So help you what? You’re not my mommy or my caregiver. Your threats are toothless.”

Leah swallowed hard, her bluff called. “I wanted to see what it was like…”

“See what it was like? Why?”

“Curiosity.”

“Curiosity, huh? Well, something tells me that you bit off more than you can chew.”

“I...I didn’t think I’d feel so exposed.”

“That’s the least of your worries. I’ve found, thanks to Kylie, that no one really cares unless it's shoved into their faces, but I’ve been seeing you down bottles of water like you were parched.”

“They are warmer than I thought. And the powder doesn’t help. I can smell it wherever I go and if I can, everyone else can.”

“You’re worrying too much, which is why it was so easy to figure out what’s going on with you.” Lucy said. “Look around. No one is paying any attention to us, except maybe those guys over there but that’s not the point. Horny teenagers seeing girls in skirts, it kinda writes itself.” Leah glanced over her shoulder to see a group of four or five boys looking in her direction. It made her even more self conscious because she knew her butt was sticking out more due to the extra padding.

“Focus, Leah. Ignore them.” Lucy said.

“Easy for you to say. You’re used to all of this by now.”

“I am. And you know how I got used to it? By not worrying about it. So what if someone figures it out. These are complete strangers. People you will never see again. And it’s for one day. Do you really think they will remember one girl in a diaper they saw once in passing while at the zoo?” She postulated. “Instead of thinking so much about the outside opinion on something that only you and I know, instead think of what you know, and what you feel.”

Donna and Kylie walked ahead of them as they headed for the rhinoceros exhibit.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, what do you feel? Right now?”

“Like I have to pee.”

“Good. That’s simple enough. Now look over there where the bathrooms are. See the long ass line up of women? That could be you, standing at the end of that line, waiting to pee, not quite sure if you are going to make it or not. But that’s not you today. Today, you can pee whenever you want to. I’ve peed three times since we left the house! It’s not a big deal. It’s weird as hell the first few times, but after a while, your body just kind of goes into autopilot. I mean, I’ve even started wetting fully during the night. Half the time, I don’t even notice that I have to go before I realize that I’m going, and you know what? No one suspects a thing! You could look me dead in the eyes and pee to your heart's content and I would have no idea.”

“But then you have to walk around with it all day.”

“Not all day. And that’s your head getting in the way of science. These things are like super absorbent, better than any tampon or pad. They pull the moisture away and unless you sit directly on it or cross your legs, you’d never even know it’s there. At least on the first pee. Three or four in and it starts to get heavy and sags, then it’s time for a change. And Donna is quick to learn your schedule and when you need such a change.” Lucy said. Her maturity and acceptance of wearing diapers was on par with Kylie’s.

“Don’t you feel wrong when you...wet?”

“Wrong? No. In fact, once you're used to it, you wonder why you would ever want to hold it again. At least for me. What I feel is what everyone feels. Relief. The thing is that I don’t have to go to a special room or wait my turn to get that relief.”

“There is some logic to what you are saying.”

“Think of it this way. You want to know what it’s like to wear one, I’m guessing so that you can better relate to Kylie. You are halfway there. You’re in one, you are clearly self conscious about how you look, and you are trying to get over that hurdle of actually using it. I’m betting that Donna told you that had to use it, no matter what. It’s your mind that is stopping you, not your body. Sure, you can obsess over the gross factor, but you’re grasping at straws. It’s less gross than your period and believe me, these are great for those weeks, let me tell you.

“So just let go. Take a minute, go over there next to the wall and let it happen. Your body knows what to do, you’ve been doing it since birth, and I promise you, once you’re past this first one, the rest come easier and easier to the point where you will wonder why we even bothered potty training in the first place.

“Which, by the way, is because doing the other in a diaper is gross. Like extremely gross. I don’t even like doing it yet and I made a deal with Donna that she changes me immediately after.”

“I don’t think I’ll be doing that any time soon.”

“You never know. It could happen. But go get over your fear and take a pee in your pants, it’ll change your world.”

They stopped to look at the rhinos and Lucy pointed to a wall that was a little away from the group. Leah bit her lower lip as she worked her way through the small crowd. She was scared of what she might think about herself or what she would feel if she let it happen but the urge to go was getting too hard to ignore. She was so used to sitting to go that she didn’t know how to let go from a standing position so she leaned against the wall, and slid down to feel like she was sitting. She tried to relax and think of anything else but how ridiculous she looked and when that didn’t work, and her legs started to cramp, she stood up, rubbing her back on the wall to make it look like she had an itch. She was frustrated with herself that she couldn’t accomplish something so simple as to pee without a toilet. She thought of all the guys she had hung around with that could just whip it out and go wherever and how envious she was of them at parties where she had to cross her legs while standing in line for the one toilet. She thought of all the times when she had been so close to not making it and the few times that she hadn’t made it. She thought about how embarrassed she was having it stream down her legs. Her bladder and self control had failed her and she had to let it out. Kinda like now. The realization hit her like a truck and she quickly looked around to see if anyone had noticed. She looked down to see if it was leaking down her legs but there was nothing. The pressure she had been feeling was easing and she honestly felt kind of good. Ashamed, but good. Lucy was right. It didn’t feel like it was sitting against her skin and the warmth was sort of reassuring, like peeing in a diaper was the right thing to do. She looked through the crowd at Lucy, who caught her gaze and responded with a wink.

Leah made her way back through the crowd and returned to Lucy’s side feeling both literally and figuratively relieved.

“Wasn’t that bad was it?” Lucy asked.

“No. It wasn’t. Getting it to happen was a challenge, but now that it’s over, I feel pretty good.”

“Not grossed out?”

“Not like I thought I would be, that’s for sure.”

“That’s because it was all in your head, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah. I guess it was.”

“And how do you feel?”

“Better.”

“That’s it? Better?”

“Should I feel something different?”

“You don’t feel little or childish? I mean, you just wet your diaper like a baby.”

Leah thought for a moment as they moved on towards the last exhibit, the lions. “No. I don’t feel anything like that.”

“Dirty or naughty? In a sexual way, I mean.”

“Nope. Nothing.”

“Then clearly, you aren’t like Kylie or me. You don’t seem to get any special feelings from being in one or using one.”

“Is that bad?”

“No. I don’t think so. I mean, not everyone is going to be as fucked up as Kylie or me, so I wouldn’t worry about it. You seem to get your rocks off being a bossy bitch so you’ve got that going for you.”

Lucy didn’t see Donna move through the crowd but paid fast attention when Donna’s hand slapped her mouth. “That’s enough of your potty mouth, young lady!” She said sternly, digging into her purse for a pacifier. She shoved it into Lucy’s mouth and held it there against Lucy’s protests. Lucy pouted for a moment before falling silent and sucked on the pacifier. The crowd seemed to take notice but moved on without them and Lucy’s face was red from embarrassment.

“Now that you’ve embarrassed me, you can keep that in your mouth until I say otherwise, understood.” Lucy nodded.

“I can’t hear your head rattle.”

“Yesh, Mommy.” Lucy said, garbling her words around the bulb on her tongue.

“Good girl. Now, I’m sure that you need to be changed by now.” Donna said, snaking her hand up Lucy’s skirt to squeeze the front of her diaper. “Very much so. What about you, Kylie?”

“Yes, Mommy.”

“I see. Well, let’s head back to the van and I will get you changed, then we will have lunch before we go to the aquarium.”

“To see the fishies?!” Kylie asked exuberantly.

“Yes, to see the fish.” Donna said.

“C’mon Lucy, I’ll race ya to the car!” Kylie challenged, taking Lucy’s hand as they bolted towards the zoo entrance.

“Those girls.” Donna said with a smile. “They have more energy than I remember having at that age.”

“They are so full of life.” Leah said.

“And what about you? Are you full?”

“I-uh...what?”

“Did you wet your pants like a good girl?”

“Donna, I-”

“My name is Mommy, little girl, now answer me before I check you myself.”

“Y-yes, Mommy. I did.”

“Did what?”

“Do I have to say it?”

“Yes. Part of finding out what it’s like is fulfilling the role entirely. It’s not just cute clothes and being waited on hand and foot. Best say it quickly before the next group arrives.”

Leah looked in the direction they came and sure enough, another group was coming within earshot.

“I wet my pants, Mommy.” She hurriedly said, not wanting to be overheard.

“And do you need to be changed?”

The thought of laying in the back of the van while Donna changed her diaper in a public parking lot under the prying eyes of Lucy and Kylie was too daunting of a prospect.

“N-no. I think I’m fine.”

“Okay. Have it your way, but that’s the last time that I will ask. Next time, you won’t get a choice and that’s final, understood?”

“Yes, Mommy.”

“Good, now take my hand and let’s go find out what your sisters are doing.” Donna took Leah’s hand, not giving her a choice in the matter and pulled her towards the exit. Leah felt like a child, having been exposed as a pants wetter and talked down to like she’d talked down to Kylie. It gave her a rush, but not a rush of excitement. She couldn’t really tell what she was feeling, just that she didn’t want to be changed in the back of a van in front of her friends. She didn’t want to be changed at all.

At the van, Leah stood watch while Donna changed Lucy. “The baby had to go first,” Donna said, “before she leaked all over the place.” No one seemed to notice or take heed to what was going on and Leah half wondered if she should confess her predicament to Kylie in order to get a change. Her diaper would undoubtedly be able to hold more and the longer she went between changes, the more likely Kylie would notice. She wondered if there was even a point to hiding it from her friend. After all, she was only doing this to better understand Kylie, but she felt that if Kylie knew, she would go out of her way to make sure that attention was drawn to Leah and she didn’t want that. Kylie was holding Donna’s purse when Donna’s phone chimed.

“Kylie? Be a dear and see who that is?”

Kylie pulled out the phone and saw the text message. Her eyes widened and the happiness drained from her face.

“Kylie?” Leah asked, “Is everything okay?”

“W-we have to go.” Kylie said, dropping all pretense of her little self. “Sarah sent this.” She said, reading aloud. “The deed is done. He’s on the floor in his room with two doses in his leg. I doubt that he will be able to stand for a while but I’m not taking the chance. He’s used me for the last time and I will make them all pay. I give you this one chance, Donna, on Kylie’s behalf, to walk away from him and the Institute. Take the girls and anything you need from the house and go. I will not chase you. But if I find that you aided him or them in what happened to me, there will be no rock, no island, no plot of land on the forsaken planet that you can hide from me. It will burn, it will all burn, and the fires of my revenge will scorch this land and leave it like they left me. Barren.”

Kylie was holding her hand over her mouth. “What does she mean by barren?”

Donna’s tone was grim, her voice serious. “It doesn’t matter. What matters is that we need to go. We have to get our stuff and get as far away from this mess as we can.”

Leah spoke up. “They did something to her, didn’t they?”

“Get in your seats, girls, it doesn’t matter. Sarah’s past is Sarah’s past.”

Kylie stood her ground, defiant. “The truth, Donna. I didn’t stick my neck out for you to be fed lies. And I will not let your lies put my friends in danger.”

“It’s not a lie. It’s a secret. One last secret.” Donna said, sitting on the bumper of the van.

“There is a department of the Institute that we don’t talk about. I first found out what they do there when I met Sarah for the first time, before she became Apple. The cases...like yours, that end in failure, they sometimes resort to extreme measures to keep their perfect record.”

“Like what?”

“Like forced medical procedures. Invasive. Cruel. Some are minor, yet all are terrifying. The tour guide? I don’t know if you ever met her. They ripped all of her teeth out, without her consent, to hammer the point home that they owned her. They gave her false teeth when she finally submitted to the program and became a success. Others have had surgeries done to make sure they never have bladder or bowel control again, forced to stay in diapers forever. But the worst one was Sarah. They gave her a hysterectomy, ripping out her womanhood so that she would stay a perfect girl forever, and so that she could never get pregnant.

“That was the last straw for me the first time. When I found out what they were doing to our patients, I quit, taking all of my work and my evidence with me, determined to shut them down. But the department was liquidated before any of my evidence could be collaborated. Without hard evidence, I was just a crackpot that had a mental breakdown, or so they called it, and made up crazy stories.”

“So why go back to work for them?”

“Because I knew that the proof was out there. It may not be in a file or on a piece of paper, but the people they did these things to were still there. They were brainwashed by Stockholm’s syndrome but I knew that if I could just get one to wake up, just one, then I’d have a chance to bring it all down.”

“So why not side with Sarah?”

“She could never trust me. She will always see me as the enemy.”

“Why?”

“Because I was the one who suggested she partake in the program in the first place. I set her on the path to have all of these terrible things done to her. It’s my fault and I deserve everything she has to throw at me.” Donna hung her head, tears running down her face. “There was only a few of us at the time. We hadn’t gotten the widespread renown that we have today. I-I thought I could help her. I thought that if I recommended her, I would be assigned to her care. B-but I wasn’t. He was and there was nothing I could do to protect her from him. By the time the truth had gotten out, he was too well protected by Moira to be stopped. And Sarah was gone. He had psychologically brutalized her existence out of her, replacing it with Apple. She wasn’t Sarah anymore and I feared that she never would be again.” Donna looked up to see Kylie furiously typing a message in Donna’s phone. “Kylie? What are you doing?”

“Saving you.” She said, hitting the send icon. “I let Sarah know that we will do everything we can to get any information that will help her take the Institute down. We will be her spies on the inside, Leah and me.”

“I can’t-”

“Shut up. I don’t want to hear it. You need to take Lucy and go, get as far away from this city as you can.” Kylie said, her voice stone cold. “Look, I love you, Donna, I truly do, but your part in this story is over.”

“Kylie, maybe we should think about this.”

“There’s nothing to think about, Leah. What they did Sarah, what they did to Lucy and me, that can’t happen to anyone else. It won’t stop until they are stopped. And it won’t stop if I turn away and do nothing. I can’t make you follow me, but if you love me, truly love me, then you won’t try and stop me.”

“I want to help.” Lucy said. “My dad’s got influence. I can use his name to get the word out on what’s happening. Donna and I will be in touch with you, you be in touch with Sarah, and together, we can make that bitch Moira pay!”

Donna looked at her girls, a swell of pride building in her chest. It was an insurmountable task by herself, but with a network of spies feeding information to the right people, it just might be possible.

“First thing’s first,” Donna said, “We need to get our stuff from Mark’s house, and send him a little message that he won’t ever forget!”

Kylie looked at Leah. “Are you in?”

Leah looked at Kylie. “I always knew you were a bad little bitch. You’re so fucking hot right now that I might cream my pants. You know I’m in!”

They came together and passionately kissed with Lucy catcalling from the van.

“I want you.” Leah said in a whisper.

“I know. But we have to handle this first.”

“I-I have a confession to make.”

“Can it wait?”

Leah took Kylie’s hand and pressed it to her groin. Kylie’s eyes widened and she stopped moving for a second, her fingers feeling the familiar smoothness of the plastic from underneath Leah’s skirt.

“You’re-”

“I am. For you. I wanted to see what it was like. For you. I’m all in for you.”

Kylie blushed and smiled, completely caught off guard. “You know you can’t get out of that until Donna says so.”

“I know. I was kinda hoping that you would show me what all the fuss is about.”

“Girls! We need to go!” Donna yelled from the front seat of the van. The engine was running and she sounded impatient.

“Later. I promise.”

For the first time since finding Kylie, Leah felt like she wasn’t in control. It reminded her of her college days when the guys called the shots and it made her tingle inside. She wasn’t going to be anything like Kylie, but for one day, she could play the part of the cute, inexperienced girl.

Mark was exactly where Sarah said he was. They recognized the smell the moment they entered the house. He was still breathing, though barely, as being face down on his carpet didn’t help. The girls had talked about what they were going to do with him before they took their stuff and ran. Donna lamented involving the three younger women in her plot but they cast her worries aside. They all had a reason to hate him, just to a lesser degree. Donna sent the girls downstairs to pack. They didn’t have any grown up clothes and there were some childish outfits that they loved. Donna, meanwhile, went to confront Mark.

“It seems your past has finally caught up with you.” She said, stepping into his limited sight. “Big bad man, reduced to being as helpless as an infant. My my, how the tables have turned.”

She crouched down in front of him so that he could see her. “I warned you that this could happen. Years ago, when you first introduced us to Apple. I told you that you couldn’t control a person like that forever. I wish I had time to gloat, but I don't. Her wrath will be great and terrible. And you rightly deserve it. But for now, I have other plans for you. Something that will help you remember me.”

The girls had finished downstairs and their stuff was stacked in the hallway.

“Grab that blanket, girls. Lay it next to him so we can roll him on to it.” Donna instructed.

It took some effort and a lot of gagging, but the girls rolled Mark onto the blanket.

“We need to get him downstairs.” Donna said, grabbing a bunch of the blanket. They heaved and hoed, pulling Mark slowly down the hall to the stairs.

“Won’t this hurt if he goes down the stairs like this?”

“Oh, I’m sure. That’s kind of the point.” Donna said, giving the blanket a tug. They didn’t complain as they pulled and pushed, slowly sliding him down the stairs one thump at a time.

“To that crib.” Donna said, pointing. They drug him to the nearest crib and Donna lowered the bars. “Go to the dresser over there and grab the scissors.”

Donna cut Mark’s clothes off and with the girl’s help, she cleaned him up. “A little taste of your own medicine, Mark.” Donna said, unlocking a drawer under the diaper cupboard. She pulled out two diapers, one larger than the other and both larger than anything the girls were wearing. Mark’s eyes went wide and darted from side to side in protest. Donna cut slits into the smaller of the two diapers.

“Hold his legs up, girls. Real high.” She said, unfolding the cut diaper. She fluffed it slowly and deliberately. “Lucy, will you grab the box marked Fleet from the cupboard?”

“Yes, Mommy.” Lucy said, grabbing the box, and opening it. In it was a bottle of liquid.

“Excellent.” Donna said, sliding the diaper under Mark’s bottom. She took the bottle from Lucy, removed the cap, and with an unsettling smile on her face, inserted the nozzle into Mark’s rear. She squeezed it as hard as she could, emptying its contents into him. She quickly tossed the bottle aside and pulled the diaper up between his legs, taping it closed with ruthless efficiency. She unfolded and fluffed the next one, repeating the process while the girls looked at her with fear and confusion.

The wet sound of gurgling from his bottom clued them in to what was happening to him, and the need for speed. His bowels emptied again in a series of squirts and farts as his eyes went wide from shock and horror.

“We need to get him into the crib.” Donna said, grabbing him by the shoulders. It took several tries and a lot of straining but they managed to lift his large frame into the crib. “Lucy, bring me the mittens. Leah, over there are the anklets. And Kylie, get the muzzle.” They had him sitting up in the crib to maximise the spread of his mess. Leah and Lucy put the anklets and mittens on him, with Donna strategically placing his hands at his sides.

“If you would, Kylie?” She asked, motioning to the pacifier gag. She turned her attention to Mark as she took the gag from Kylie’s outstretched hand.

“I’m not one for being cruel, but I am one for proving my point.” She said to Mark as she pushed the bulb of the pacifier into his mouth. “For far too long, you have treated every woman you’ve met as a piece of property. A tool for you to use and abuse. But that stops now.” She slowly fastened the straps around his head, tightly securing them. “Have you ever had a diaper rash? I know, they seem like a minor irritation, but let me assure you, yours will be anything but.

Let this be your one and only warning. Stay the fuck away from me and my girls.” She held the remote in her hand and slowly pressed the button. The anklets magnetized, pulling him from a sitting position to a lying position as his feet were stuck to the six in discs in the corners of the crib. “You know how this works, right? You’ve seen the schematics? They will only shut off from my remote or a power failure.” She pressed another button and his arms slapped to the sides of the crib, effectively securing him in place.

“There, the baby is all ready for bed. If my math is right, you will be paralysed for about a few days, with no one to know what’s going on. Too much soundproofing, you know. And, because you were foolish enough to trust me, I changed the code on the door to the stairs. So even if someone were to come rescue you, they’d need administrative privileges to even get down here.

“I can’t make this clear enough, Mark. Leave the four of us alone. I won’t give you another warning. And trust me when I say that you are getting off easy compared to what I really wanted to do.

“Let’s go, girls. Someone needs time to think about his life.”

They headed for the stairs and Donna made sure to shut the lights off and secure the door. No one would know he was even down there until he made enough noise, and that could be days. They packed their limited belongings in the van and Leah’s car. The four of them stood in the driveway at an impasse. There was much left to be resolved, but they all knew that their eyes were finally open. They had a goal, and with a triumph under their belts, they felt like they had a chance to win.

“Be a good girl for Mommy.” Kylie said, hugging Lucy. “I hope we will see each other soon.”

“I will. And thanks, Kylie. You really are a lifesaver.”

“This is it, then?” Donna asked. “We just go our separate ways?”

Leah chimed in. “It feels sort of anticlimactic, doesn’t it?”

“It's the end of our journey, but in no way the end of our story.” Kylie said. “There is much to do, but for now, we need to lay low.”

“Do you think they will come after us?” Lucy asked.

Kylie turned to Donna. “No.” Donna said, “They are more afraid of Sarah than they are of us.”

“And let’s keep it that way.” Kylie added.

Lucy gave Leah a hug goodbye and sat in her car seat, waiting to be buckled in. Leah hugged Donna and promised to take care of Kylie before she went to her car, subtly aware of her need to pee again. Sitting in the car made it much easier this time as she flooded the front of her diaper with a sigh of contentment. Who knows, she thought, I may be able to get used to this.

Donna and Kylie took a lasting look at each other. Their lives had been irrevocably changed in their meeting and they had grown rather fond of each other.

“I’m going to miss you, Donna.” Kylie said, her eyes misting over.

“And I’m going to miss you, my sweet.”

“Will you hold me? One last time?” Kylie asked, her voice breaking.

“Absolutely.’ Donna said, the tears falling slowly down her cheeks. She embraced her daughter, holding her head tight to her bosom, her heartbeat pounding in Kylie’s ear.

“I love you, Mommy.”

“And I love you, princess. I always will, no matter what.” Donna squeezed Kylie tightly until the tears stopped falling. She wiped her eyes and broke the embrace. With a smile she said, “I, Dr. Donna Duncan, with all the authority granted to me by the Institute of Behavior Adjustment for the Betterment of You Society, do hereby release you, Kylie Gillis, from my care, having successfully completed your course as part of the First Step/ Fresh Start initiative. You are a new person, Kylie, one I’m so deeply proud of and I wish you all the best in this world.”

Kylie Gillis stood in front of her caregiver/ Mommy, her diaper in drastic need of a change, and felt on top of the world. She had done it, beating all odds and extreme conflict, she had completed the program and become a better person.

“Behavior Adjustment for the Betterment of You? You mean B. A. B. Y.? Baby? Wow! How did I not figure that out before?”

“Because you were always a baby at heart. I just helped you see the real you.”

“And you will do the same for Lucy?”

“I think we both know that Lucy is going to stay the way she is for quite some time.” “And you will love her even more because of it.” Kylie said a matter of factly.

“Yes, I will.”

There was a pause between them as their emotions settled. They didn’t know where to leave things. Their history together made parting for good too difficult.

“I-I’ll come by some time to get my car seat. Who knows, I might need it.”

“Make it more than some times. I’m sure Lucy would love to have play dates.”

“That sounds awesome! Oh, I can’t wait!” She leaped into Donna’s arms again, for one last hug goodbye. “Message me often.”

“I swear.”

“Pinky swear?”

In unison, through fresh flowing tears, they repeated their silly rhyme. “Cross my heart, hope to die, I pinky swear that I will never lie!”

In the car, Kylie wiped the tears from her eyes and looked in the mirror as Donna and Lucy headed the opposite direction from them. Her skirt had flopped up her thighs when she had plopped into the car and her sagging diaper was showing. Leah gave it a reassuring pat before turning in the direction of Kylie’s house. She wanted to go home and get changed before doing anything else, but Kylie came first. Leah loved Kylie and would do anything for her happiness.

Lori invited them in with welcoming arms and a loving embrace. She had accepted her daughter in all of her facets. She was even graciously open to their relationship, clearly showing that she was turning over a new leaf.

“Well, I must say that this has been an interesting year.” Lori said, helping to move Kylie’s belongings into her nursery room. “But that leaves me with just one question.” She said, holding up a diaper. “Do you need a change?”

Epilogue 1

Moira Vale scowled at the monitors. She’d been watching the same tape over and over again. She watched as Apple took the syringes from the case, watched her use her whorish wiles to seduce Mark into letting his guard down, and then stabbing him with the serum. That was her term for it now. A serum. It’s proven efficacy led to a whole host of possibilities. She also watched as Apple took the case of her property and fled. She tracked her debit card usage to several ATMs where she drained Mark’s bank accounts. She could have stopped it but a lesson needed to be learned. Apple ditched her car at Mark’s pharmacy and got on a bus, heading God knows where.

“Do you want her followed?” A forced voice behind her asked.

“Yes. Followed, but not bothered. We don’t know if she’s shared the serum with anyone and at the moment, we can’t take that risk.”

“Okay. What do you want done with him?”

Moira watched the monitor carefully. It was playing at double speed until she saw the arrival of the van. She slowed it down to normal playback to see Donna and the girls enter the house, take what they wanted, and mandhandle Mark downstairs. She watched as they regressed him, taking special note of the enema Donna administered, before securing him in a crib and leaving him in darkness. He had been down there for two days, trapped in the dark, before his absence had been noticed. One of his employees from the pharmacy had called into the Institute looking for him and when security did a sweep of the cameras, they found the disturbing evidence that Moira was now watching.

“I’m sure that he’s suffered enough. Take this and wait until tomorrow before going over there.”

“Do you want me to pass along a message?”

“No. He’ll get the drift eventually.” Moira said, waving the voice away. Heels clicked on the floor in retreat and Moira scowled. While she was familiar with the transition, it was still jarring to her. Pretenders. She thought. Waste of time trying to be something that you’re not.

She watched the touching goodbye between Donna and Kylie and for a moment, she mentally kicked herself for every bringing them into the Institute. Her rage at their defiance burned brightly but she quelled it with her usual stoicism. There would be a time and a place to deal with them, but for now, she would let them be. Apple was her primary concern and her potential threat to Moira’s empire could not go unnoticed.

She looked at the stack of potential contracts for the serum. It’s lucrative value was far larger than anyone had anticipated. From medical to policing to military, the ability to render someone paralysed for 24 to 36 hours with minimal side effects was revolutionary. It wasn’t like a drug like this didn’t already exist, but a weaponized version hadn’t yet been developed. She stood to make billions off the military usage alone. And to think that one little damaged girl could destroy all of that potential.

“Not on my watch!” Moira said to no one. She was standing at her floor to ceiling windows, looking out over the city. She swirled the alcohol and the ice cube in her glass, listening to the clink. She sipped it as she stared out into the emptiness and felt the emptiness stare back.

Donna and Lucy had moved back into Penny’s old house. It had been put up for sale by the Institute when Penny had moved away and Donna was able to buy it for herself. It had taken a few weeks before the paperwork was finalized and another week for the cameras and proprietary technology to be removed. Things were left, like the crib, but the magnets and restraints were gone, the cameras were too, and all microphones. Donna paid an extra fee to have a third party company come in and sweep the house for anything else that might be broadcasting a signal out. They waited for another few weeks before they felt comfortable to fully move in, and were relieved when the Institute did nothing to retaliate.

Donna retained her job, but put in her resignation pending her employment as a general practitioner. It would be a pay cut, but Donna would be free from Moira’s influence. Lucy was still in the program and they wouldn’t let her go unless she was successful. Donna claimed that it was possible, citing Kylie’s success and through some clever manipulation and pressure from her father, Lucy was allowed to stay with Donna and her supplies would be delivered every week. It would be labeled as a mistake in the paperwork and go unnoticed for a long time. It wouldn’t tarnish the perfect record so it wouldn’t make it past the head of the department, Lori Gillis.

With that settled, Donna set out the rules for Lucy’s prolonged stay. They had discussed the matter several times and Lucy’s resolve didn’t waver. She wanted to be Donna’s baby. She only bargained for some leniency in her clothing choices. She knew that she wouldn’t be able to get out of wearing diapers and she honestly didn’t want to. She wanted to be able to dress the way she liked and Donna agreed on one condition, anything she wore had to fit over her diapers. Everything else pretty much stayed the same. Lucy did have a means of changing a few things she needed as Donna wanted to make sure that Lucy stayed happy. They settled into their routine, even as Donna changed employers and Lucy, to keep from going stir crazy, enrolled in college to further her education.

That didn’t stop her descent into full babyhood. Her control over her bodily functions weakened by the week and when Kylie and Leah finally came to visit her, in celebration for her promise to Donna, she was almost completely dependent on diapers. Her reservations about messing herself fell to the wayside as her control faded. She didn’t have a choice in the matter anymore as her body operated on autopilot and if asked, she’d never been happier. The stress and pressure of trying to be the perfect daughter, the perfect friend, and a perfect porcelain doll had all faded away. In their stead, she was loved by her new mother, cherished by her new friends, and played dress up and tea party with her dolls instead of being one.

Lucy’s transformation and acceptance as her baby was everything Donna had dreamed about. There was still a hole in her heart that Lucy couldn’t fill. She missed Kylie but was nothing short of delighted with Kylie’s success and continued happiness. She talked to Kylie on a daily basis, sending her updates on Lucy’s progress and just to talk. It wasn’t the same, but it was enough. She had to watch Kylie continue to grow from afar, thankful of her success and her impact on Donna’s life.

Kylie Gillis continued to thrive. Her mother’s open armed acceptance of Kylie’s new reality and it wasn’t just a facade. Lori had indeed had a change of heart and at Kylie’s bequest, she would help her daughter regress into diapers as needed.

Leah Hammiond, however, maintained most of the control over Kylie’s regression tendencies and their love life. She had gotten accepted to be Kylie’s long term au pair and was being generously paid as part of a new program Lori had pitched to the Institute. Leah was the first in a line of aftercare caregivers, people who would work with, and be available to, anyone who successfully completed the program, for up to a year, to ensure that there was no regression to their old lives. It was far more hands-on than the old method, which had caregivers like Mark or Donna messaging their clients. It stretched out the Institute’s power and influence and was voted on unanimously by the board. It was still in its trial phase, and Leah’s work and reporting of progress to Moira kept things under close guard.

The pay helped them to save for a place of their own, something that they would need to have furnished well in advance of moving in. Lori and Donna had offered to help, but the girls had refused, wanting to make their way on their own first, instead of taking a handout.

Kylie became a certified babysitter, through the state, by passing the necessary classes like CPR and the like. She worked mostly with young kids, building up her reputation around her subdivision but knowing that her calling was for people like her. She wanted to do what Leah did, but as she had to wait a year before applying, she wanted to contribute something of her own.

The three girls, Leah, Kylie, and Lucy, became very tight knit over the beginning half of the year. With Donna and Lucy living closer to Leah, Kylie wanted to spend as much time with her Pampered Princess as she could and Leah loved the on the job training. She kept Kylie in pull ups unless a punishment had been earned as Kylie worked on fully regaining control, yet every once and a while, the three of them would be diapered babies together. Under the watchful eye of Donna, that is.

How can one simple thing bring about such joy? And should they be judged for a happiness they found in the innocence of youth? Are we disgusted because we don’t understand? Or is it because we are too afraid to be happy from unconventional means? That, dear reader, is a riddle I leave for you.

Epilogue 2

Three young women, all around the same age, stopped by a pharmacy with a familiar label on the side of the building. They laughed and giggled as they went inside, joking about a movie they had just watched. They loitered around the magazine stand, flipping through various women’s magazines on celebrities and makeup. There was a couple walking around, looking lost. The woman, a stern, authoritative type, was bossing the man around. The man walked up to the store clerk, his face red, and asked where the diaper rash ointment was. The clerk, an older lady, was hard of hearing and asked him to repeat himself. He flushed again and repeated the question, loud enough for the clerk and subsequently, the girls to hear.

“Oh, I know where that is.” Kylie said. “Here, let me show you!” She headed towards aisle five as if she worked there.

“I’ve been here enough times to know what brands work best. My little brother was always getting rashes. Some of these work, but most of them don’t. So, how old is the baby?”

The guy tried to stammer out a response but the stern looking woman appeared behind him and cut him off. The woman reminded her a lot of Donna. She was tall, with dark brown hair, and carried herself with authority and purpose.

“My baby is about three and is having some difficulties with potty training, so I’ve had to keep him in diapers. Isn’t that right, sweetie?”

“Oh, I know all about that. My little brother Kevin was super difficult to potty train. He didn’t learn until he was ready for school. I’ve changed more diapers than I care to admit to. And the older they get, the more reluctant they are.” Kylie lied through her teeth. Her brother was older than her and they didn’t talk much, but it was better to put her experience into a babysitting role than to admit the truth to a stranger.

“Very true,” the woman said, “They act like they don’t need their diapers and then the second you get them in one, they are wetting themselves. They whine about wearing them, they whine about changing them, and they whine about everything else.”

“Well, they do say that boys mature much more slowly than girls. I know my brother whined a lot, so my mom had to get him one of these.” She pulled a package off its hook. “You see, this thing attaches to a baby’s pacifier so that it can be tied around their head. It sounds cruel, but it was enough to keep him quiet during changes. And of course, the threat of a

spanking was always good at getting them to behave.” Most people wouldn’t have had a clue as to what a pacifier restraint would look like which was evident by the untouched inventory hanging from the hook.

“Thankfully, I haven’t had to resort to that yet, but this sounds like it would be useful.

Don’t you agree, sweetie?”

The man shook his head no and looked mortified that he was a part of the conversation.

“And if he gets too out of hand, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to put some mittens on his hands. Keeps naughty boys from taking off their diapers.” She didn’t know why she was babbling but felt compelled to. It might have had something to do with how Leah had made her sleep last night, tied up in mittens and cuffs, curled up in a ball in nothing but her dia-

“That sounds like a marvelous idea! Where would I be able to find some of those?”

“I don’t think we need…”

“Hush now, the adults are talking,” The woman said sternly. It had to have been a slip of the tongue, but the damage was done.

Kylie stared for a second at the man, her initial suspicion back at the magazine rack gathering more proof. The man’s posture and the way he shrunk away from her gaze gave away more than the woman’ words did. She handed the package to the woman and then pulled her phone out of her pocket. She quickly found a website in her browsing history and showed it to the couple. The man strained but could barely see any of the images.

“Oh my, look at all the wonderful things! This is marvelous!”

“Yeah, I’ve had to use quite a few of them and trust me, they all work. And if you ever need any pointers,” she said, taking the woman’s phone from her and sending a message to her own phone, “just shoot me a text.”

“Well, my little one is a bit bigger than your average baby boy.”

“Boys are all the same. My brother wasn’t out of diapers until he was 18. It doesn’t matter how big they get, a baby is a baby. You have a good day, now.”

She left them alone and returned to her friends. Leah and Lucy were watching with interest and when she got close enough, Leah grabbed her by the arm and whispered.

“What was that all about?”

“Well, I need to get a job, right? So I may have led her on that I knew a few things about baby stuff.”

“What makes you think they were into your kind of baby stuff?”

“Watch the guy walk. Discreetly or you will give it away. Doesn’t it look like he’s overdue for a diaper change?”

Peering over the top of her magazine, Leah watched as the man waddled. It was painfully obvious after Kylie pointed it out. She had seen the same puffy bottomed features on her lover and her friend.

“I’ll be damned. You think she’ll take the bait?”

“I’m guessing so. I’ll play it off like it ain’t nothing and hopefully, make some money.”

“Don’t get lost in their world though. Remember who you belong to.”

“Like I could ever forget!” Kylie said, pulling the front of her pants open, revealing the Disney Princess pull up she wore.

“You best not, or it’ll be one week in diapers for you missy!”