The Alpaca in the Room - F4A - Comedy - When Jealousy Gets Complicated (Patreon)

Okay, so… funny story? You know Alex, my ex ex, capital-E-X? Ran into them in the supermarket. Totally fine, nothing weird... except they think you and I are dating, which is obviously ridiculous. Right? Right?? Except now I can’t stop thinking about it and you're giving me that look and I’m holding this cushion like a shield and oh my God, why are you so annoyingly attractive when I’m panicking? I didn’t mean to say any of this. Honestly, I came in for biscuits and now I’m confessing my undying feelings. Cool cool cool.

✧･ﾟ Meet the Players ･ﾟ✧

🧑‍🎤 Speaker Teaser

This is not a confession. It’s a meltdown. A biscuit-fuelled, Alex-triggered, slightly adorable meltdown. But also maybe a little bit a confession. Tiny one. Teeny. Shut up.

🎧 Listener Teaser

You're not helping. You're just sitting there all calm and lovely like “oh, go on, tell me how you’re secretly in love with me,” and I will, okay? I will. Probably. Maybe. Shut up.

✧ Filed Under: This Is What You’re In For ✧

[F4A] The Alpaca in the Room [Romance][Comedy][Best Friend Roleplay][Love Confession][Friends to Lovers][Jealousy][Vulnerability][Supermarket Encounter][Ex Drama][Mutual Pining][Miscommunication][Not a Date, but Totally a Date][Wait, Did You Just Say That?][This Is Fine. Everything Is Fine][We’re Just Friends, Shut Up][You Said the Quiet Part Out Loud][Who Told My Ex We Were Dating?][You’re So Annoying I’d Still Date You] Will Use This Cushion in Defence][That Is Not a Happy Look][Why Not? Just Say Why Not.][It’s Not an Alpaca, It’s an Elephant][Yes, I Want To Date You, Shut Up][Don’t Say It Unless You Mean It][We’re Super Best Friends, Okay?][Definitely Not a Confession][This Is a Trap and I Fell In][My Ex Thinks We’re Dating and Maybe They’re Right][I Wanted To Say It, Okay?][I Want You To Want Me]

⚠︎ Read Me Before You Regret It ⚠︎

Trigger Warnings: emotional vulnerability, romantic confusion, accidental love confession, self-deprecating humour

✧ Just One Question... ✧

Your brain decides to do a full emotional striptease in the middle of what was supposed to be a petty rant. Do you go with it, or try to shove the feelings back into your internal filing cabinet marked DO NOT OPEN EVER?