The World's Weakest Hero, Volume 2, Chapters 2-3 (Patreon)

Chapter 2

“Ahem.” I clear my throat as Lyra and I start walking down the street once more. “So, did you want to get something to eat before we go to our next destination?”

“I’m not hungry at the moment, but…” Lyra eyes me. “Aren’t you ignoring something important?”

“Am I?” I look around.

“It’s me!” A telepathic voice fills our minds.

“Oh yeah, the Great Spirit of Water. Didn’t you say you were going back to sleep?”

“And didn’t you say you wanted me to stay awake and work hard!?”

“Dunno. Can’t remember.”

“Tritooooon…!”

“The name’s Lezard now. Triton died 15 years ago, remember?”

“Lezard?” The Great Spirit of Water goes silent for a few seconds. “Lezard!? You mean like lizard!? Bwahahaha! What a silly name!”

“So you don’t understand the greatness of my new name, huh? How unfortunate.”

“Lezard the lizard~” Her playful voice contains a hint of harmony. “Watch out everyone, the reptile is here~”

“This reptile is going to really enjoy telling your new host all about our previous adventures together.”

“Wha…!?”

“Hey Lyra, I’m feeling a bit like reminiscing today, so how would you like to hear about how 15 years ago, the Great Spirit of Water’s host got incredibly drunk and—”

“STOP!! Nothing like that ever happened!”

Lyra sighs. “It seems the two of you have more of a history than I imagined. I knew the previous host had met you, but I didn’t realize that you had such a close relationship with the Great Spirit of Water.”

“Well, the host at the time, Sybil, was one of the first spiritkin I met when I first arrived in your homeland. She was quite accommodating, unlike the spirit she hosted.”

“What’s that supposed to mean!?”

“What were your words, exactly? ‘Throw him back into the mist from whence he emerged!’, wasn’t it?”

“Hmph! It’s only natural when faced with such a powerful human who suddenly appeared, isn’t it? At the time, you weren’t a host for—" The Great Spirit of Water goes silent for a moment. “Um, what exactly have you told Lyra…?”

“I’ve kept all the secrets I promised, and I’m sure she would like it if you did the same.”

“I guess it can’t be helped.”

“Lyra’s smart, so she’s already figured some things out. But a promise is a promise, so until I have her permission, I’ll be avoiding a few subjects.” My second sentence is aimed at Lyra, more so than the Great Spirit of Water. “Ignoring that, let’s iron out a few things. Just how much has your spirit power recovered?”

“Not a lot, unfortunately. The corruption sank deep before I went into hibernation, so I haven’t been able to gain most of my strength back yet.”

“I thought so, from the power I feel coming from you. But I’m the same right now. I overused my power and almost left this world for a second time.”

“Someone managed to push you to your limit?” The Great Spirit of Water sounded shocked. “Don’t tell me—have you already defeated whoever it is that was creating the mist?”

“No. The one who made me use all my strength was … one of the weakest leviathan-class I’ve ever seen.”

“…Huh?”

“Take a good look at me.”

The Great Spirit of Water gives me a thorough look. Not just at my body but at my soul. And what she sees is…

“Why are you so weaaaaaaaaaaak!? What happened to that overwhelming strength you used to have!?”

“Overwhelming…?” Lyra says softly. “Even to a Great Spirit?”

“Bwah! Even if all twelve of the Great Spirits fought Triton, the battle would have been over in an instant.”

“You don’t mean…”

“The twelve of us wouldn’t have stood a chance.”

“No way…”

I shrug. “That power’s been sealed … for now. I recruited Lyra to help me get it back, but none of us are at our full strength yet, so we’ll be staying in the city for a while.”

“You said you had a destination in mind? Where are you taking us, then?”

“Right here.” I stop in front of a large building.

Not only is it massive compared to everything around it, but the land on both sides is blocked by a stone wall, which runs all the way behind the building. The wall encases more land area than the building’s footprint, which goes to show just how wealthy the owner must be, considering the price of real estate in a city like this.

Although calling the one who runs this place the owner isn’t quite right. The true owner is the king himself. And I don’t mean that in a symbolic way, like how the king technically owns all the land in the kingdom.

No, he literally owns the building because what they offer inside is essentially a state-controlled service—though each individual one does have some autonomy.

“An Adventurer’s Guild,” Lyra says. “From my studies, I learned that places like this help strengthen human warriors by giving them tasks, such as defeating monsters.”

“Yeah, you heard right. That’s the ultimate goal, though not all of the jobs they offer here will make their members stronger. Some quests are barely more than busy work, but they’re necessary to make sure low ranked adventurers can earn a living when starting out.”

“And you want us to join?”

“Even though we’re a little lacking right now, that doesn’t mean we have to just sit around the inn all day. So, I figure we can at least join and take some jobs for a few days. It’ll be fun, and we can earn some coin.”

“I’m not against it. Do you think you’ll be able to get stronger before we enter the mist?”

“Well … probably not. Defeating weak monsters won’t do me any good. Only something on the level of an aberrant gives me experience points right now—and not much, at that. And I don’t plan on taking any tough missions here since I need to conserve my strength.”

Lyra nods. “Makes sense. The last thing I want to do is nothing again. I had enough of that while staying in the previous city as a refugee.”

“Oh, right. I bet you were bored, huh?” I push open the guild doors. “But we won’t have time to be bored anymore.”

The guild’s inside is as large as one would expect, considering the size of the building. Not only do adventurers come here to accept quests, but the place acts as an official hub for people who are serious about growing stronger.

That doesn’t mean raising their level—that can only happen out in the field, completing quests. But there’s another way to get stronger, one that if ignored, often leads even powerful adventurers to their deaths.

Knowledge.

“It’s quite crowded in here.” Lyra peers around the large room, which looks like a restaurant with all the tables and chairs filled with patrons. “And why are some of them treating it as dinery?”

“The Adventurer’s Guild provides more services than just a place to accept missions. Food, personalized coaching, and combat training are all available in-house. And that’s not including other reasons to spend time here, like picking the brains of more experienced adventurers or finding the scoop on the latest news on monster movements or the mist.”

“I guess that’s optimal for growing them into strong warriors. Does that also mean there’s a lengthy registration process?”

“Well, lengthy isn’t quite right, but there might be a few bumps in the road.”

“Such as?”

“You’re about to find out.”

We step up to the counter, where a woman is sitting. She looks up from the book she’s been reading, but she doesn’t get in a hurry to greet us.

Her hand moves across the counter, then comes back holding a red ribbon. After meticulously placing it into the groove of the book, she slowly closes it. Finally, she takes a pair of glasses from somewhere else on the counter and puts them on.

Then, and only then, does she decide to greet us.

“May I help you?” She sounds drowsy. Or just really lazy. I can’t rule that out.

“Hey there, Miss. The two of us would like to register as adventurers.”

She looks between us, slowly. “How old?”

“Fifteen!” I puff my chest out.

“Fifteen, as well.” Lyra speaks in her usual monotone.

The guild receptionist looks between us, slowly … again. “Are you sure about that?”

I put on a slight pout. “Why are you looking at me when you ask that? I’m an adult, okay? An adult.”

“You’re just a little … lacking?”

“I’ll have you know I’m the average height and weight for a person my age.” I take a look around the guild room and see a bunch of men much taller and thicker than me. “It just so happens that there’s a positive correlation between those with large frames and those who join the Adventurer’s Guild. For obvious reasons.”

“Is that so?” She opens another book, then pushes it towards us. “You look like the sort who can write, so just put your name down and everything else.”

I take the registration journal, along with the quill. “Thanks, Miss.”

The only information they want is name, age, and hometown. While I could put the name of any number of nearby villages down, it’d be strange for someone well-dressed and well-spoken to come from a rural town. So, I simply place the name of the city we’re currently in.

If they do decide to look into my background, it’d be easy to question a small village and find out I lied on the registration. But it’d be much harder to do so in a large city, where there are so many nooks and crannies for a person to grow up.

I instruct Lyra to do the same, and while she’s writing, she raises an eyebrow at the name I put in for myself. She uses her actual name, as nobody knows she’s working with me, except Mitsuki.

And there’s no way she’s going to spill our secret alliance.

When Lyra finishes, we push the book across the counter. The receptionist takes the registration back, and after removing her glasses, she picks up the quill herself.

“You’re going to Lina, obviously…” She scribbles something next to our names. “Nobody else likes dealing with children.”

She quickly finishes, putting the quill back down and closes the registration. After making sure both are in their proper positions, she rings a bell that she keeps barely within arm’s reach.

Finally, she retrieves her original book, opens it, takes the red ribbon out before placing it meticulously back onto the counter, then begins to read.

As soon as the receptionist’s eyes begin moving across the page, the door behind her opens. Standing in the doorway is a young woman with a long ponytail. She gives off the vibes of a scientist or a schoolteacher, though she’d need a pair of glasses to really seal the deal.

The young woman, Lina, looks to the receptionist first. But seeing that her older coworker is busy reading, she doesn’t bother asking any questions. Instead, she looks directly at me and Lyra.

“Oh, hello there. Did both of you register to join the guild?”

“Yeah.” I nod as I speak.

“Goodness.” She opens a small door built into the counter. “Please, follow me. I’m Lina, and I’ll be your advisor for as long as needed. And don’t worry, there are many jobs here that aren’t any more dangerous than farmwork.”

“I’m not worried, though.” I step through the small opening in the counter.

“That’s great! As an adventurer, it’s good to have confidence. But it’s even better to know your limits, so please don’t do anything too dangerous.”

“It’s true that I’m very limited right now, but that won’t be the case forever.”

Lina nods. “Yes, exactly! I’m glad you understand.”

She and I are talking about different things, but I don’t plan to correct her misunderstanding. Instead, Lyra and I just follow her through the door in the back and into a private room where she can begin her advising.

Chapter 3

“Lyra, is it?” Lina puts her registration paper down onto the desk and looks up at my spiritkin companion.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Please, call me Miss Lina. I’ll be your advisor for a long time, so it would be nice to speak less formally, wouldn’t it?”

“I understand, Miss Lina.”

I turn my head slightly and mumble under my breath. “Why aren’t you this understanding with me…”

Lyra’s eyes flick to me, containing all the moments of lizardry that she’s had to put up with since we met.

I ignore her gaze and give Lina my most innocent smile as our new advisor turns her face to me.

“Triton?” Lina looks between me and my registration paper. “You are just the right age for the name, aren’t you?”

“I sure am, Miss Lina. And as you know, the name got really popular when the last hero defeated the one that was creating the mist.”

“Goodness, that’s true. You couldn’t go a city block without at least one mother who wanted to name her next child after Hero Triton.”

“You still refer to him as Hero, huh?”

Lina shows me an understanding smile. “Some people can be quite harsh on him now, but at least the mist retreated for a few years. It was more than anyone else could do.”

There’s an unspoken apology in Lina’s smile. No doubt she suspects I’ve been bullied for my name, considering some people believe that Hero Triton failed.

But she’s too sweet to bring the subject up directly, worried that she’d be pouring salt on open wounds. That’s not the case, and I want to make that clear. After all, she’ll be our advisor for a while.

“Triton succeeded,” I say. “I don’t know what happened after, but I’m sure he defeated whoever was creating the mist. So, I’m proud to have the name.”

“That’s good.” Lina nods, the apologetic look vanishing. “And now that you’re an adventurer, you want to follow in his footsteps?”

“Yep! I want to walk the same path he did. And maybe one day, I’ll get his strength and become this world’s strongest hero!”

“Goodness, me. That’s quite a goal, Triton. As your advisor, I’ll do my best to make it possible.”

“Thanks!” I give her a small bow.

With introductions out of the way, Lina visibly changes gears. She reaches into a drawer at the desk where she’s sitting and pulls out a few pieces of paper.

After spreading them out for everyone to see, she flips one so the words are upside down from her perspective. But since we’re sitting in front of her desk, that means Lyra and I can read it properly from our angle.

“Typically,” Lina says, “I recommend starting off with this. It’s simple and safe, but the pay is better than most F-Rank quests.”

“Gathering herbs, huh?” I read over the quest Lina is recommending.

“Since you two grew up here, you should recognize these plants. That will make finding them simple for you, wouldn’t it? And since they’re needed for potions, we can never get enough of them.”

“Says here that the guild sponsors trips to the forest to gather them, too.”

“Yes. Every few days, a guild member will lead a group there, and the junior members will spend time gathering the herbs. It’s efficient and safe. Since the guild member is a former adventurer, there’s no need to worry about any monsters.”

I nod. “A good way to orient new adventurers while giving them a bit of autonomy.”

“I’m glad you understand. Then, would you like to sign up for the next trip? It’s tomorrow morning, so you won’t have to wait long.”

“No, thanks. Pay isn’t something I’m worried about, and spending an entire day in the forest picking plants would be inconvenient.”

Lina looks surprised. “Goodness. I was sure this would be perfect for you. In that case…”

She begins flipping the next page so we can read it from our perspective, but I raise my hand before she can start explaining what the next quest is about.

“Actually, I don’t think any of those quests will fit us.”

Lina smiles a bit awkwardly. “I know they’re not as heroic as you imagined, but it’s dangerous to take a monster hunting quest as your first. There are a lot of things that can go wrong when fighting.”

“I’ve fought my share of monsters already, which is why I want to take the rank test. If I’m stuck as an F-Rank, I won’t be able to take any good monster hunting quests.”

“Eh!? You want to take the rank test!?”

“Yep. According to the Adventurer’s Guild, new members can request the rank test when joining to determine their strength so they’re placed in the appropriate rank. I’d like to request it, as would Lyra.”

“But … that rule exists mainly for new members who were former soldiers. It’s highly recommended that those who just came of age not take the rank test.”

“Highly recommended, but not outright forbidden.”

“True…” Lina looks conflicted. “The examiner really dislikes it when … err, confident youngsters request it.”

“Hmm. I get the feeling this examiner isn’t so kind as to use the term ‘confident youngsters’.”

“Haha…” Lina’s smile doesn’t reach her eyes.

“Either way, we want to take it. And don’t worry, we won’t get beat up by the examiner.” I turn to Lyra. “Right?”

“I plan to win.”

“See?” I turn back to Lina, who still looks unconvinced.

“If you’re that determined, then I can’t stop you. But please reconsider one last time. The examiner, Hawk, is a former B-Rank adventurer. He’s even fought in the mist.”

“Perfect. Sign us up.”

Lina deflates a bit at having failed to convince us, but this is just how it has to be. There’s no way I’m going to do something boring like picking flowers all day tomorrow, under the supervision of a babysitter.

Even if we can’t afford to go all-out against some powerful monsters these next few days, raising our adventurer rank will open up a lot of options. We’ll be able to choose nearly any quest we want, meaning we can find one that suits us.

The F-Rank quests that Lina was kind enough to offer us are put back into the drawer. In their place, another document appears. There’s actually two, but they’re both the same. One’s for me, and one’s for Lyra.

“If you’re sure you want to take the rank test, then please sign these request forms. I’ll deliver them to the Guild Master for review.”

“Thanks, Lina!” I take the quill and sign my name without hesitation.

Lyra does the same, and afterwards, our new advisor gathers the forms, asks us to wait patiently, then leaves the office.

“She’s very trusting,” Lyra says, looking around the office that contains a mix of Lina’s personal possessions and guild items, including documents and paperwork.

“Lina seems like the type to see the bright side of people. Or maybe her instincts told her she could trust us to not steal anything.”

“Those kinds of people are the best targets for those with bad intentions. I have a feeling her trust has been betrayed before.”

“And yet she still left us alone in her office. Anyone who can get burned and still trust their instincts is okay in my book.”

“I suppose so. It’s still a little concerning, though.”

“She has a bright aura,” the Great Spirit of Water says. “That’s rare for people her age.”

“She’s still rather young, though,” I say.

“Yes, but most people lose it by the time they reach adulthood. She’s a rare exception.”

“And what about me? My aura should be just as innocent and pure as Lina’s, right?”

“Hahahaha!”

“Don’t laugh, you stupid water spirit!”

“GAHAHAHAH!!!!” Her laughter bellows through our mental connection even louder than before.

The dumb water spirit’s reaction aside, Lina does have a level of innocence that’s not often found in adults. Some might say she’s naïve, but she’s not airheaded enough for that.

Rather, she’s just the kind of person that would rather trust someone when her instincts tell her to, rather than suspect them before they’ve given her a reason. Thanks to that, getting her to agree to the rank test was easy.

After a bit of a wait, Lina returns to the office, the paperwork still in her hands. When she takes a seat and puts the papers back down on the desk, I can see where the Guild Master stamped them, giving permission for us to take the test.

“He wasn’t happy about it,” Lina says. “But the Guild Master agreed to allow both of you to take the rank test.”

“That’s great news. When do you think the examiner will be ready?”

“I stopped by to speak with him on my way back. He was … also not happy. But he wanted to start right away.”

“Perfect. We’re ready, too.”

Lina stands, despite having just sat down at her desk. “Then, please follow me again.”

She leads us back out to the hall, then to the end of the corridor. Rather than a room, the final door in the hallway is an exit, leading to the walled-in section of the guild’s open grounds.

It’s here that trainers are teaching young adventurers the art of combat and magic, passing on their techniques and knowledge to the newer generation.

Those young adventurers are even older than me and Lyra, which just goes to show why Lina expected and wanted us to take the slow and easy path. The lifestyle of an adventurer is a perilous one, but there are ways to mitigate that risk.

It’s possible to increase the chance of survival by taking easy quests, earning some coin to buy better gear, training in our downtime, and soaking up knowledge. As someone who obviously wants to see us stay safe, that’s the path Lina wants us to take.

But there’s nothing quite like dropping a nuclear bomb on people’s expectations and enjoying the aftermath.

“You can’t be serious, Lina.” An eye-patched man looks us up and down with his one good eye. “These cocky upstarts were the ones you were talking about?”

“You know the rules, Hawk. If they’re strong enough for a higher rank, they have the chance to prove it when they join.”

“You really think these kids are good for anything but exterminating rats in the sewers?”

“Haha…” Lina’s smile stiffens. “Well, I’m rooting for them. And you’ll go a bit easy, right?”

“Hell no.”

“Aww…”

Hawk’s eye falls back on me. His gaze is a bit piercing, but it’s nothing compared to the eyes I’ve had glaring at me in the past. Even Isaac had an icier stare than Hawk.

But he wasn’t a B-Ranked adventurer without reason. He’s clearly been through some difficult situations, as evidenced by his missing eye. And that experience has given him the ability to judge people far more accurately than the average person.

“You.” Hawk’s one eye narrows. “What’s your name?”

“Triton.”

“Tch. Taking after that bastard, are ya? This fight might be worth it, then.”

“I’m glad to hear that. Then, do you want to test me first?”

Hawk takes a blunted metal sword from the rack, then steps into the nearby dirt arena. “Don’t be scared. It’ll only hurt for a few days.”

I follow his example, grabbing the same style of sword. “I’m not a masochist, so I was thinking of just blocking and dodging all your attacks, rather than getting hit.”

“Easy to say.” He smacks the blunted edge of the metal sword into his palm. “Hard to do.”

Standing across the dirt arena, I ready myself for the test. A small crowd has already gathered to watch, with more coming from other parts of the walled-in grounds.

Wanting to give them a good show, I give the sword a few practice swings to get a feeling for the weight and balance. After only a handful of heartbeats, I fall into a combat pose.

The first of the rank tests is about to begin.