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[#54] Patreon Bonus (Patreon)

Published:
2023-12-27 20:00:05
Edited:
2024-12-15 03:57:33
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

Content

QT and Maya tell a story about cheaters using the Ashley Madison online dating service, discuss Christmas traditions, upcoming trips, and go over the reddit.

https://www.reddit.com/r/wineaboutitpodcast/

Files

Comments

Chloe Rene

These always make my day 💖

jill

Uploaded 7 min ago…… I am a crazy person

jill

girls who like to break up relationships have what I call Ariana grande syndrome

your_reese

i feel betrayed :( never subsribed

Alysson Farris

There’s a hospice nurse on tiktok (can’t remember which one or her name) who talks about death and dying, and she said that it’s very common and normal to want to know how people died because then we can gauge our risk level of dying that way. And that this is somewhat of a survival instinct. She says that it doesn’t make someone a bad person if they are anxious about the cause of death and their own potential risk of dying by that cause. If nothing else, her video normalized that anxiety for me.

Julie

Wowie 🫣

KellyAnn

Kathy Park-Hong’s book Minor Feelings discusses how one of her therapist straight up said to her that she couldn’t help her anymore and just referred her to other therapists. It was crazy

Devyn

i've heard qt ask so many different people what to get Lud's mom that I'm dying to know what she actually got her lol

ChillsPaysBills

Very disappointed to hear such River Dolphin slander this episode 😞 they're one of my favorite Amazon animals

Jesper Nielsen

I finally caved in and subscribed to the patreon (before watching the latest episode) and found out that I got baited FeelsBadMan

Sam

Not maya calling Blaine from Glee Blaire

SuperPax

Is it Blaire or Blare?

Smalls

Didn't expect to hear a random Nik Nocturnal mention. lol

Nivaldo Farias

come to brazil 🇧🇷 (be careful though)

mayhemilyy

12:50 i've been in this situation, actually. my dad was on dating apps when i was a teenager; i told him either he could come clean or i would. really shitty choice for a kid to have to make tbh

Jeremy

it wouldn't be -ists, it would be -isms. an -ism tier list could have some fun -isms like socialism, alcoholism, or activism

BisonHero

Maya really called jumping spiders "stout", when "chonky" was right there.

Alec Guerin

A tier list of prejudices

Luke Schultz

When I was around 10 I had to check my dads email for something and he had an email from Ashley Madison. Figured out what it was when I asked my mom and safe to say she wasn’t happy.

Manny Rod

Damn you got me!

Elijah

Happy new year’s, everyone! Can’t wait to hear/see all the cool events and streams and all the rest going into 2024!

Michael Alexander

QT has extra baller spoons. Its goldware not silverware

Alex Blythe

Congrats to bringing wine about it back in 2023. Cheers to amazing 2024! Thank you for the S tier content!

Alex Blythe

Baited but stay for a good time ☺️

Melodyingg

People don't make mental health channels because sometimes people will trauma dump. Been a mod in a server with that happening and it got so uncomfortable for everyone, you shouldn't go to a discord server to have someone talk you out of sh. It puts a lot of weight on people that aren't trained to handle those situations

bruna

QT, most homophobes aren't "a little curious", they just hate gay people.

Kady

saying that homophobes are secretly gay just minimizes the violence they perpetuate toward gay people

lyrra (lurrkingly)

as a therapist (i work mostly w couples)--""breaking up"" with clients is definitely a thing that happens. typically ending therapy should be initiated by the client, but the therapist always has the right to end the relationship themselves if they don't feel like it's a good fit ("fit" here can mean, like, personality-wise, or just that the therapist doesn't specialize in the type of care that the client needs). It's normal to offer the client referrals to other therapists who might be a better fit, lol. Typically it's regarded as doing the best thing for the client--they deserve to work with a clinician who is actually a better fit for their individual personality and needs. Just like how you can't get along with everyone you meet in life, you're not going to be the right therapist for every client that comes to you.

ApplesOranges23

I paid $5 to make sure FanFan hadn't felt pressure to. And if so, I'd be willing to have everyone hate me for saying so. I'm relieved that it was a nice interview, like all the rest. I have first born traits, and have 2 young kids, so I often have mama bear instincts. Also related to a WAI ep when you called FanFan: one of the "I've Had It" ladies, who's going to be a Fear& guest soon, has a story of trying to use a spoon after being so constipated after childbirth. I love Jennifer & Angie, they are so funny. They're long time best friends and both of your podcasts have similarities.

Chipz

I’ve never heard of Ashley Madison, that’s insane that that exists

Xavier

Love the hair/nails Maya! Usually just an audio listener but had to click in for those. Also, at the Christmas show, I was so afraid QT would slip on the chair- especially in high heels but honestly props for pulling it off 👏

Cumtropolis

i was subscribed before but I'll happily pretend like i came here for fanfans boobs n not the hot goss

Klav

forsen

Dohregard

I paid $5 to hear this weird babysitter story. To add about the therapist thing, yes they do break up with clients if they do crazy stuff. My therapist had me sign some stuff and explained to me that it was because of a bad experience with another client the week before and I can only imagine what happened...

soloPFL

The sentiment that anyone doesn’t deserve proper therapy is understandable but that is what leads to extreme outcomes to a mental health crises. Essentially the most fuck up people need therapy the most. What we learned is that maya would not be a good therapist. Also the “isms“ they listed can all be summarized under fascism.

ashyc

I remember ashley madison from that guy getting exposed from 19 kids and counting

pipaman247

I had a feeling that babysitter resurfacing randomly was going to turn dark and sad very quick.

Twirby

I can’t even fathom getting on a dating app to meet people who want to cheat on their current partner. How could you ever trust each other?

Taylor

Kind of wild to think there was a chance QT would have pressured fanfan into flashing her tits

Fraud_Monet

My girlfriend is a (couples) therapist, she definitely hates some clients, but is 75% of the time will to profit off their bullshit. It's a little more tragic when the people they're hurting are sitting there as well.

Grace

As someone training to be a psychologist I've always viewed it as a unique opportunity to prevent harm. Of course you, as a therapist, have every right to say "I don't think I am the right fit for you" and refer them elsewhere, but having a client who has harmful behaviours or actions, regardless if that's towards themselves or others, is what I signed up for (personally) in being a therapist. I think if they've made the effort to be here and I'm not willing to listen to them or engage in some level of understanding, then how are they meant to grow as a human and learn to be better? Unconditional positive regard doesn't mean condoning or justifying someone's actions, it means reserving judgment and providing a neutral space to acknowledge and work through them with the goal of understanding and improving.

ApplesOranges23

Hi Jimothy. The only time I've heard that name was when Post Malone called Jimmy Fallon that at the Olive Garden. I thought he made it up as an affectionate nickname. I won't leave you hanging for too long, the kids and I are going to help our neighbor who just started working in her yard, the roses are blooming right now. As soon as I clean up the cup of water one of my cats knocked over on the carpet. I am verbose, and it normally takes a few edits to get to the point. My answer probably has as many levels as QT's sense of humor, and hopefully isn't as offensive as you might be imagining. I genuinely appreciate your similar protective inclinations.

Julie T

my fav part was mayas look of horror and confusion when qt said the river dolphins turning into men and kidnapping women story reminded her of something

Andrew Roberts

I love when QT tells high school stories because its always through the lens of this sheltered mormon girl. It always ads a funny aspect to them.

samilovee

funny maya brought up exs or bad people from ur past getting special treatment by their therapists luckily in my case my ex went to therapy after our break up n specifically chose a female therapist n ended up getting pissed n dropping her cause she called him on his shit basically telling him he needs to do better. hope that gives u peace of mind it’ll catch up to them eventually. bible

theholyspirit

i dont wanna be annoying but the narrative that homophobes are just secretly gay is harmful, i understand people joke. but majority of homophobes are just privileged cishet people who wish to oppress and enact violence against those who are different than them. That narrative pushes the blame on queer people as an in-community issue rather than holding straight people accountable for harm and violence they do. its kinda like passing the blame to avoid acknowledging the oppressors violence. dont get me wrong, i also make this kind of joke sometimes as a queer person, i just wanna make sure no one actually believes that all homophobic people are secretly gay, and as they mentioned, this kind of narrative doesnt work for other forms of oppression(racism, abliesm etc) because its simply not true that those harming marginalised communities are the communities themselves. idk if this makes sense at all. also disclaimer im not trying to be mean, annoying, accusatory or anything, im just writing my thoughts in hopes to inform if needed. Also completely unrelated but therapists can drop clients for whatever reason, and they should be calling their clients out on bad behavior in order to help them progress, if theyre just being a yes-man, thats probably not a good or productive therapist imo.

KyberShiesty

Regarding the scenario you described about "awful people" and their experience in therapy If you believe other people are receiving unconditional positive feedback from their therapists without being appropriately challenged, or without receiving honest negative feedback when necessary, do you feel that you are also receiving the same treatment as well? Or to put it in other words, is it possible the substandard therapeutic treatment from your scenario is a reflection of how you perceive you are being treated by your therapist? Just a thought that occurred to me when watching, because my understanding of therapy and my personal experience with it are very different from what you were describing in that scenario. That difference in how we perceive therapy is also why I disagree with the idea that awful people don't deserve therapy, because I don't view therapeutic care to be only positive and affirmative in nature. As for the idea of therapists only choosing to treat "good" people, while I respect therapists' right to refuse treatment for any reason, I hope that they make that decision based on whether or not they believe they can help the patient, rather than refusing to see anyone they personally dislike.

Aaron Forbes

As much as I got baited, I only bought it after Maya said she would talk about the AM friend on the patreon, so here I am lol

Shunbound

Racism comes from ignorance and insecurities People who have nothing else will cling onto ANYTHING to give themselves worth.

MK 1XA

I really really love the podcast but i really think you guys should wear earbuds rather than these headsets. Maybe its just me i feel like it will look better since headsets look goofy and feel more personal??

Robert Fisher

Yeah, I'm 30 and for deaths of people I knew in high school, it's really weird. Like, you kind of expect the ones that are ODs, but you never really expect suicide or people getting hit by cars. It really stings when the ones that you knew had a family with kids. Crazy to think about, but that's just life I guess.

jaspersjourney

It would an -isms section Yes therapists can refuse to treat people. Therapists are allowed to tell people what they've done is wrong. They are even allowed to be super straight forward just most aren't like that. Every one is different. Therapists don't just try to make them understand why it happened, they're meant to help prevent new things from happening as well. (and obviously coping skills) Just knowing why you did something doesnt prevent you from doing it. That being said, therapists who treat actual criminals are trained differently than your regular everyday therapist. They can be more straight forward because criminals (generally) respect that more. Edit: oh yeah i have a b.s in forensic psychology

Isobel Nixon

I had a friend in a very similar situation to Brittany, except the wife was my friends manager at work and she eventually found out. Very messy.

BinkyBonky

i think an idea for a channel in the discord about mental health could be like a "venting/mental health" channel. I've seen it in a couple other places where the rule is that you can vent, but no one is allowed to give advice, only care and empathy/kind words that kinda stuff

Heather von Tater

Patreon fam, how do I join the discord tyia 🫡

Hanna

I'm one of those kids where my mom cheated on my dad, I found out thru snooping on her phone (my bad lol), and then she told me I'd break up the family if I said anything so I kept the secret for YEARS before I finally told my dad, only after she cheated again. They're still very unhappily together to this day. Not fun but it happens lol

sims3enjoyer

i have had 2 therapists tell me they can no longer see me. The first was because she simply was not knowledgable enough about my specific therapeutic needs, and recommended me many many of her collegues who she thought would benefit me more. THE OTHER TIME my therapist was flat out like no I wont see you anymore because I was just genuinely too much for her i think. Anyway. DBT is magical and wonderful and I recommend it to everyone.

Eric

This episode resonated with me so hard. Never cheat, people would much rather have you end it than lie about it

Lezzleee

The frother is just an cheap aerator. you might already have in your home. Some wine people do indeed use aerators

Kirsi

My sister was dumped by her therapist once! She essentially was like "I can't continue working with you if you refuse to put any of the work in the get better" or something like that, bc they'd been working together for years and my sister was still up to the same bullshit

octoberdancing

A good therapist will hold someone accountable! 100%. People go to therapy to learn their blind spots, so the therapist has to do that. But I have thought about that and it is gross and also they’re likely not even telling the whole truth.

octoberdancing

I’ve been broken up with by a therapist because she couldn’t handle that I was suicidal. Looking back, she was a bad therapist in other ways though. She said she specializes in PTSD but she was soooo bad.

Paddy

That's beyond fucked up, they should have their licence and degree taken away IMMEDIATELY. A children's psychologist told me at 15 that I was going through too much (also suicidal) and couldn't be helped and I will never get that out of my head. I don't know if therapy can fix that kind of thing 😅