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Consider this a first draft. I've been working on it for a few months, right? Something like that. Not sure if I want to keep the little, idk, breezy sound at the end or maybe i continue the song? idk. thoughts welcome.if you love-loved it, lemme know. if you thought it was okay, that's helpful, too <3Also: Happy 4th, everyone_[Verse 1]They dropped us hot on the wrong grid, wrong time, wrong warDessy’s likeGood—I’m boredMight as well bleed some moreI said, "Aye, Ma'am"She snaps, "Don't Ma'am me""What am I, yer' mommy? You want milk or a time-out, Bam-Bam-Bambi"[Verse 2]The west ridge is humming like a hymnbook, hellish, high-strungScreams too fine for flesh—but I caught onePatch notes made me perfect, but she likes when I act dumbSays she likes her lassies glitchy, twitchy, tongue-tied, numb[Verse 3]She one-taps tanks, nails filed knife-wideOnly thing she kens is call for fire—So I fire back my bestLayin’ down hate like herNails through mah prom dressWe ghost gun nests quicker than herKitty soaks mah chestAnd maybe I confessed, buried deep in the messI’d rather die with her thanLive for less[Verse 4]She called me “idiot”—meant “don’t get hit” againFelt that in my chipset, hardwired to commit again[Interlude]AgainAgain again againAgain again againAgain again againAgain again again[Verse 5]Got grit in your teeth and your blood on my handsAnother lost bet in a no-man’s landYou smile like an air-burst right in my face, you—Guess every love’s got its war to embrace[Verse 6]Helmet hair, last cigaretteI’d trade every scar for just one minuteSay you’ll meet me in the dirtKiss me hard, then make it hurt[Bridge]If dying means staying, then leave me right hereThere’s love in your orders,[Break]But you can't hide pain in cheer[Outro]Pick me up or knock me flat_For my notes: RGR_🍾, R1, M_01

Comments

Malak997

Slaps harder than a 308, will be blasting this for days.

Charli Morgan

đŸ„č that's seriously so sweet of you to say

Seph[đŸȘđŸ–€đŸˆ]

Not what I was expecting but it’s still fucking amazing. I love the direction you’re going with it. I think I need to go listen to it on some speakers cause I felt like my earbuds weren’t giving it its best shot.

Cody Cannon

My gym Playlist just extended.

timberwolfj

10/10 you've done it again!

Charli Morgan

is the ending perfect or could the song go longer?

Seph[đŸȘđŸ–€đŸˆ]

You’re the only one who can really know if it’s perfect. But I’m fighting against my own bias to say that the ending might be perfect. I almost always want your songs to last a little longer (Charli Charli give me more) but I also usually want you to take it easy on the distortion. This song might need neither.

A

First listen I wasn’t sure on it, but it’s grown on me. Something on Verse 1 doesn’t quite jive for me but I like the rest of it, especially Verse 2 (double especially the call for fire) and Verse 6 and the ending. I think the dreamy/breezy bit of the ending is nice. The change to add the Scots is neat too.

Charli Morgan

this whole song is super weird isn't it 😂 I felt the same way with verse 1

A

We’re consistently somewhere on a spectrum of weird, but that’s also what makes your songs so entrapping! Trying to put my finger on Verse 1 it might be the phonetics make it sound a little loose for those lines. Like the pronunciation of “Ay” vs a harder “Aye” for example.

Charli Morgan

I think I need to extend this song. it feels like there is so much mroe that could happen but, ugh, it's basically done and I don't want to wait another four months on this one.