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LIVESTREAM! Tomorrow at 3pm PST! (Patreon)

Published:
2017-05-11 19:11:40
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

Content

Ask your questions below and I will do my best to get through them on the livestream!! xoxo younow.com/katimorton

Comments

Emily Williams

Hey Kati. My entire life is changing right now. I'm about to move an hour away from my support system, I graduate college in December, I'm moving across the country in the spring, and I'm about to meet my little brother from my birth family (next weekend). I really don't handle change well (even thought these are good changes), and I've completely relapsed. I'm not really eating again, I've self-harmed, and I'm extremely depressed. I purged for the first time a few weeks ago and am struggling not to do it again. I want to act like I'm only struggling because everything is insane in my life, and it's not a big deal because I'll be fine once my life calms down... but I know that's not true. I'm not sure what type of help to ask for right now. Like, is it worth starting medication if I'll probably be fine in 4 months? Is it worth looking into ED treatment if I'm not willing to pause my life for it? I see a LPC right now, and am going to start seeing a dietitian in the fall... I just don't know how I'm going to make it through the summer. Question 2... Advice for meeting my little brother for the first time? I'm adopted, he was not... We talk almost every day but I'm still so scared. I'm 21, he's 19. We're both musicians and nerds and have depression so we should get along fine...

Steffie Eve Armstrong

Having issues trying to keep myself from being angry. I've not really experienced a lot of anger before so it's a really strange feeling. A lot has happened recently, we've spoken about that but I'm angry about everything! My dad dying, my ex leaving, what another person has done to cause my PTSD and pretty much everything is making me so angry. I'm normally a calm person but I'm just so pissed off about everything! And I hate myself for feeling like this.

Jenny Hughes

Hey Kati, I was laid off at work by my father whom I live with so I am having a hard time not being angry at him.I was in a bad wreck in march and had to get a new car so now I have a car payment and I have other bills I can't work because my physical health that is why it was ideal that I worked for my dad because he understood my limitations now I am not sure what to do I feel so lost

Em

Hi Kati. Question: Is it selfish to self harm or engage in ED behaviors that some call a "slow suicide"? That's not my intent - it's coping. But I had a family friend commit suicide and some people think that was selfish. I don't want to do that to my loved ones, and don't plan to. But is self harm/purging etc....selfish? I do so much for others, and it's the only way I can cope sometimes.

Emily Bensaid

Hey! Mines much like the first question here: I'm about to go to university as you know but this means I am moving six hours away from any support that I've got which scares me to death. I am sure however that if i went with my other uni option (2 hour distance) I'd give up at the first panic attack. How can I tell whether what I'm doing is positive and confidence building or actually too big a step for me at this point? It's the perfect degree for me and my dream city so I'm excited but really nervous. X

jenrox

Hi Kati, My OCD is getting pretty bad lately and I have been working with my therapist on it. My problem is that I can't use public restrooms. This is true at hotels too. I also can't shower unless I'm at home. This makes vacations very hard for me. I don't have any compulsions that go along with it, like I don't constantly wash my hands even though it really stems around germs. My therapist wants me to try and figure what my fear is and I'm having a hard time coming up with that and I fully realize that the whole thing doesn't make sense. So it's hard to fix. I don't worry that I'll get sick. It's like it's rooted deep inside me from childhood. Thank you for any insight.

Em

Thought Of another one. Is it possible to have had things (like sexual abuse) happen to you as a young child and not remember them? Due to blocking them out? I would have been 5-6 at least so I would think I would remember unless it was blocked out. Thanks.

Chantelle k

Hey Kati, My depression isnt doing so good at the moment, lack of motivation, negative thoughts are killing me. I have a disability called HSP (Hereditary Spastic Paraplegia) which affects my walking, I got a phone call the other day from the hospital for an operation on monday, to help me with my walking. I should be happy and hopeful and I guess grateful, but I dont feel any of that, I just rather be dead. Im not suicidal, I just wish I could just die (cancer,car crash,murder) sorry, in the end I didnt have a question, guess it was a vent

May Unmade

Does the Courage to heal workbook help for sexual assault in general?

Hannah

I'm currently finding it hard to stay positive on a daily basis... I have important school exams coming up to get into university and I feel like I don't have the time to take time each day to do mindfullness activities and journal etc. I'm struggling to sleep properly because of stress and now it's just a vicious cycle of stress and exhaustion and negativity. Not really sure what to do as there's no one I can talk to about this... Thank you xx

Sara

Hi Kati, My question is day to day things I have to do or conversations I have, I forget easily. Certain things from my past that has happened in the past abuse, assaulted, bullying etc theses memories keep coming to me out of nowhere. Why. I do go periods of time where I cannot remember Anything I just don't understand why these memories have to come out of nowhere

Siobhan

Hey Kati!! Can laughing for no reason be a symptom of mental illness?

Sofie Peschardt

Hey Kati, sorry for the late question, but.. You talk about how to make sleeping easier (schedule, not mixing your areas, limiting technology, etc) in your video about sleeping well. But do you have any tips on how to fall asleep in the moment? Like, when you are in bed unable to fall asleep even though you're really tired. Sorry if this isn't making much sense, I'm multitasking while listening to the livestream.

Keely Pearmain

Hi Kati, As you know I've been seeing this therapist and we are getting along really well even though it's really hard and I'm struggling. I've found ways to open up in session by using post it notes to write subjects on and it really helps. Last session we got through some hard things but I can't bring myself to talk about the abuse I suffered from my dad when I was young. It nearly came up and I froze. She said "so there are still things that you've not told me," and I felt really awful that I couldn't tell her. I decided to email her saying that I do trust her but I can't physically talk about it, mentioned in the email about the abuse (didn't go into details at all) but now I'm literally dreading going to therapy and I feel sick just thinking about it. I just don't know what to do because I know that I need to go but i don't think anything will prepare me to answer questions or talk about it. Thanks kee x

Sheepishness

Hey Kati! So, I don't think just therapy has been helping lately. I feeling stuck and a little hopeless to be honest. I suppose that means I should try medication again, and it is the perfect time to do it since the semester is finally over so side effects wont affect school stuff. I've had a bad experience with meds before so I am terrified of it... My parents are also really unsupportive about it. They "don't believe in medication" and just say a lot of comments that make me feel bad about it... Is there any other option? I can't really do it without their support since I can't pay for it on my own. I don't know what to do :( Also I'd love it if you could make a video on health anxiety! As soon as something is wrong, I google it and fall down the spiral of side effects and just causes so much anxiety. (Also the WebMD spiral everytime something is wrong that's somehow always cancer hahhaha)

Denise Daines

I have been through alot and I am not sure what information is important. I really have several questions. For now here is some quick info I will be 52 in a few days. I really didn't know I had any troubles copping until August of 2012 and even then I didn't realize I had any issues. I started therapy in October of 2012 and things got worse. Memories started flooding in. Almost 5 years later with several hospitalitions I finally know I need help. Now heres were it gets interesting. I'm willing to get help, and I recongnize the need for help and I once again have been left to figure everything out on my own. I don't get it. I'm tired of fighting so hard just to continue so hard to survive. I am in a DBT program now and so I am trying to just give you facts right now. My current therapist has stated to me she believes I say and do things to get a reaction. I don't need attention, I would Luke it! But I don't need it. U gave survived this so far without it. I no longer need it. She doesn't belive my diagnose. So, My first question is how do I get her to beyond her disbeliefs?

Kati Morton
>>5133691

It is definitely worth starting medication eve if you are better in 4 months! I have many clients who will go on a medication just to get through a tough period of time. Also, work with your LPC to come up with tools and plans for you when you are away and in transition. I would also encourage you to journal about all that you are feeling and all that is coming up for you. We need to give you an outlet for your feelings that isn't SH or ED. xoxo As for the ED treatment, it's always worth it as long as you want to get better (meaning you just don't like things the way they are now.. not that you want recovery. Not everyone can honestly say they want that.. and that's normal). xoxo As for your second question: Take your time. It's good you already talk to him, but maybe let him know that you aren't sure if you will be able to stay or how you will feel. Also, don't make plans for the rest of that day. Allow yourself to feel it all and give yourself time to process through it until you feel a bit better. xoxo

Kati Morton
>>5133969

I gave you some ideas about this in my message :) We are going to have to find healthy ways for your to express your anger.. cause it's okay to be angry. Bad things have happened.. we just need to find ways to get it out!! xoxo

Kati Morton
>>5142796

Sometimes it helps just to vent!! I hope you feel a bit better just getting it out!!! xoxo

Em
>>5140301

Thanks so much!! I couldn't watch so another kinion told me where in the video you answered my question. I'm going to watch the video you linked to now. Thanks so much!!!!

Kati Morton
>>5137784

I don't think it's selfish. we often don't see another way to cope, or a way out. SH and ED behavior are really just coping skills to get us through other things that are going on. I would encourage you to reach out for help though.. because things can get better with the proper treatment. xoxo

Em
>>5137784

Thank you for making me feel better about the selfish thing <3 I am going to see my therapist starting mid June. :)

Kati Morton
>>5138287

I honestly think that if you feel it's the best decision for you.. then you are good to go. Any change is going to make us nervous.. and if we have already struggled.. those old pesky urges and symptoms can come back. We just have to use our tools and supports to get us through. I find that if we can get through the first couple of weeks we are good to go. Allow yourself to feel nervous, just make sure you use your tools and support system too!! You got this!! I am so excited for you. Oh, and you can tell that something is too much if we are struggling to even get by with what we are doing right now. So adding more is obviously going to be too much.. but if we are doing okay now, then I think it's good to push a bit :)

Kati Morton
>>5138538

Have you ever tried any exposure therapy techniques?? I would bring this up with your therapist. I also have a video on it: <a href="https://youtu.be/mlJy85EQrCI" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://youtu.be/mlJy85EQrCI</a> I know it sounds terrible.. but sometimes we don't have to figure out where the compulsions come from we just have to fight back against them. In OCD by not doing the compulsion.. the urges slowly go away. Maybe talk about this in therapy and see if that helps. xoxo

Kati Morton
>>5152972

Can you try and set aside 20 mins each day?? I know that can be hard, but we have to prioritize our mental health or the other stuff we have to do can't really get done. It could be as simple as waking up 20-30 mins early and spending that time in meditation, journaling, reading positive quotes etc. :) That way you are still putting back into yourself even though things are feeling busy and stressful. It should also end up helping your sleep too.. cause if we feel better and are taking better care of ourselves, sleep will get easier an easier. xoxo

Kati Morton
>>5153308

Hey Sara :) What you are explaining sounds a lot like dissociation to me. Many of my clients struggle with this when processing or just surviving a trauma. Have you tried any grounding techniques? I have talked about them in past videos..heres one: <a href="https://youtu.be/1vckMPHaITA" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://youtu.be/1vckMPHaITA</a> and also with repressed memories (which most trauma memories are) they can sort of pop out of nowhere and upset us). I have a video about those too. If you aren't already, I would look into working with a therapist.. preferably someone who understands trauma. xoxo I hope that helps honey!!

Kati Morton
>>5154089

Truthfully something that can help.. and I think I have mentioned this before, so sorry if I am repeating myself. But that is to tell yourself the story of a dream.. like you get to set it up and decide what it will be about. make sure it's very dream focused.. not about things you have to do or need to do. Another helpful tip is to keep a pad of paper by your bed and write down the things you don't want to forget for tomorrow. Lastly, Melatonin helps me when nothing else seems to work :) xoxo I hope those help!! xoxo

Kati Morton
>>5154210

Hey Keely!! I am SO PROUD of you for opening up as much as you have already!! Yay!! I know how hard that is. As for what to do in your next session.. you can just tell her (or email her before) that you aren't able to talk about it yet. Ask her to check in with you in a week or two to see if you are, but you aren't there yet. It's completely okay to not be ready.. and just starting the conversation is a huge step. So be proud of yourself!! And know you can take a break from it for a little bit :) xoxo

Kati Morton
>>5155306

Are your parents supportive enough to come to a therapy session for a bit? I have had many parents come in for a session or half a session to talk about medication. Many psychiatrists will do that too and explain why medication works and why some people need it each day. You could also try talking to them about it.. (practice ahead of time as always, and imagine what they might say) but that way you could tell them that you are feeling worse and nothing else seems to help. There are so many options for medication, I have no doubt we can find one that works for you.. as always make sure you ask your doctor any and all questions you have and know what side effects are most common so we can be prepared :) Keep me posted!! I hope this helps a bit! xoxo Oh and as for that video idea.. its on my list!! xox

Kati Morton
>>5186245

In all truth.. DBT will help so much with all that you are feeling. and can help with that want for attention.. because it's normal to like it, but we have to figure out why and where that urge comes from. I think DBT is going to be so helpful for you!!! xoxo As for your therapist I would ask her why she doesn't believe your diagnosis and what she thinks your diagnosis should be. Know that you can disagree with her, but it's good to know why you agree or disagree. Lastly, if you don't feel this therapist is really working with you.. I would ask for a referral to someone else. You could even ask your DBT therapist for that too :) xoxo

Keely Pearmain
>>5154210

It's SO hard Hun, She has since said that we can talk about it when I'm ready, but she said it will be really helpful for me if and when I can eventually talk about it. Thanks Hun, I'm not quite at the "I'm proud of myself" stage yet. It's all a bit intense at the moment. I'm dreading going on Thursday just because now I know that she knows if that makes sense. I know that she won't judge me but it's still in the back of my mind. I don't want her to pity me either because I'm not a victim x I hope you and Sean are both ok xxxxx take care luv kee xx

Sara
>>5153308

Hi Kati. Thank you for the information I will definitely go check out the videos. I believe I might have in the past but that little girl refresh my mind. I have found it very hard to find a therapist here, and the once or twice I have gone in the past I had a really bad experience. I felt like they did not understand Oregon what I was trying to tell for what I was going through.

Tom Clegg

I just self-diagnosed myself (your favorite thing I'm sure) with tangential speech disorder; without know it was a "real DSM 5" thing. I do have a psychiatrist and psychologist thankfully, but was hoping for your opinion relating to it and "thinking too fast" being comorbid with bipolar and insomnia, and as a side effect of cautious NDRI medication for the former. It it's frustrating to others and myself. Asynchronous editable communication helps, and I did edit this about a dozen times. Obviously isn't always an option and other real life things have an effect on this. P.S. Any chance of more collaboration with Always Open? P.S.S. I have a 'pattern' of hitting a breaking point every ~6 years and that matches up with 2017 and sorry if my knowing the definitions of things makes this harder to answer.

Monica

Hi Kati, I'm worried about trust issues i'm feeling with my psychiatrist. Long story short: My best friend of 20 years and i used to see the same psychiatrist until the beginning of last month ( April) when my best friend was wrongfully 5150's by our shared dr. I cant even begin to explain how this made me feel. I was terrified for my friend, and terrified that i was going to be misunderstood during a session and 5150'd too since we are SO SIMILAR. I'm currently struggling with BPD and think i'm struggling with bipolar 2 mood swings, but dont think the Psychiatrist believes my struggles are to the as problematic as i do. I feel like i'm spiraling out of control and since my last appointment on April 10th, i'm been doubting that she's the right doctor for me. Event though before this situation, i loved her. Any advice? I'm really scared of confrontation and am nervous to talk about it. I also want to inquire about an out-patient therapy program. Do you have a talk on Short term disability for outpatient programs? If not, i'd love to learn about that. I'm so nervous about talking to my doctor and work about it.

Monica
>>5220297

Sorry for the typos. if i would have sat and edited this little paragraph more than i did, my OCPD would just tear me apart, and its way too early for that. ( 9:05am)

Robyn Couch

I decided to train for a marathon just to be healthy and celebrate strength not thinness, but I'm finding that my ED voice is creeping up. I've been in recovery for a while now so it's not a "new" recovery, but I find I'm being mean to myself on my runs, like if i stop and walk for a bit I'm embarrassed or telling myself that i'm lazy and can't do anything and it only counts if i don't stop. I don't want to stop training but I don't want to potentially relapse or even slightly slip back into old behaviors. (Also, when you're running a lot you get hungrier and thats something that's been on my mind a lot too.)

BinsQ

Hello wonderful Kati, I was wondering if you could describe the different treatment approaches (if any) for a younger person (say 14-25) and an older person (35-45) with an eating disorder. The first time I was a teenager (14) and had BED, bulimia then anorexia b/p subtype. It came into being in that cliched 'all girls school, celebrities are so thin' way. But this time, the relpase into pure anorexia is trauma induced. My best friend enthuanised herself after discovering her severe chronic pain was not only unbearable but incurable and couldn't even be lessened. It was awful as we'd discussed her options and she was very open with me and her husband. So the secret and then the death (three year next month) just made my stomach go mad with pain if I ate normally so I just had to stop. So yes, two different ages and causes. Would you treat them differently? Obviously anxiety, depression and over crying come with the territory. What treatment level would you advise? I see a wonderfully funny psychologist once a week and it took years to find her so NEVER give up on finding 'the one' kids! Thank you so much, you have actually become my audiobook substitution and you have the greatest gift - a sense of humour. Unbreakable! Forget the workin' blues and let the good times roll (it's finally Friday here in freezing Melbourne). Bless you young Kati!

Hannah
>>5152972

I know this was from a while ago but I only just realised I never replied to thank you for your kind and positive words! They really helped! I managed to get through my exams and I am generally feeling a lot better lately☺️ thank you xox

BinsQ

Hello Kati and Sean, the Happy Little Vegemites and best anti depressants on the market, I was wondering Kati, you talk so much and so beautifully about PROCESS. I was wondering if you could just go a bit deeper into what exactly constitutes process in therapy. We hear this word so often in regular life and to clarify it from a psychological perspective would be very helpful, particularly for younger people battling mental illness. Many thanks and joyful wombat daydreams. :) BinsQ