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Livestream today at 4pm PST! (Patreon)

Published:
2017-03-10 20:15:41
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

Sorry for the late post, but ask your questions here for the livestream on @younow today at 4pm PST!! xox

Comments

Nicky Fitch

That's midnight here in the UK - I'm quite likely gonna be asleep x have a great one x x

Min

Hey kati. For the last few months my life has slowly gone to sh*t basically. I stopped going to uni, but didn't tell my family or therapist, because I figured I would manage to get everything back on track within a few weeks and I didn't want to worry them. Only now it's been almost six months, and they think I'm getting close to graduating, while instead I spend most of my days just feeling miserable in bed. I don't know how to fix it or how to tell them, but at the same time the longer it lasts, the worse I feel.

Sarah Jessica

Hi Kati! At your suggestion, I reached out to a therapist for the first time :) I had an initial consultation and really liked her. She said she would call me to set up another appointment, but its been 10 days and I haven't heard back. Is this normal and at what point should I look for someone else? Thanks so much for everything!

Bridget Arndt

#KATIFAQ I just finished my day program today. My question is how do I cope with not being in treatment anymore.

Mags

I've finally got a therapist allocated (letter for start date is in the post!) YAY! So my question is, 1. how best can I prepare, 2. what kind of routine is helpful to support the therapy, and 3. How do I mitigate being overwelmed and symptoms getting out of control. Now to take a nap so i can be up for the livestream xx

Manda Mandrell

Hi Kati, this is the question I have been iffy on asking about. Please bare with me. I have 3 therapists, one for sexual trauma and reframing beliefs and learning better relationships, one for EMDR for my PTSD, and one for CBT and to just talk. So we all had to take a break (in therapy) to address some really bad ideation (I'm sure you know what that means) and now we are FINALLY back on track and working again. The truth is, I told them that thoughts might be there but actions would never be taken and if that ever changes I would call them on the way to the hospital (to get help). So, my question is, I am actually happy (but terrified) that we're starting again, but there are still some thoughts. I don't want to tell them, because I don't know if they will just be aware and stuff or if they'll shut it down (again) until I'm more "stable." I am like 75% more stable now rather than when they shut it down to help me stabilize. I mean the thoughts are there, but unlike last time, I'm not self-harming everyday (just on occasion). What do I do?!? Please help me on this. It took A LOT to write that out and actually hit post.

Jennifer Hall

Thanks Kati!! I don't know if this is more of a question or advice. I had received news this morning that my only friend tried to kill herself. I've been isolating and haven't contacted her much until this week as we made plans for tonight earlier this week but she is in the hospital, she's okay. I feel absolutely horrible because I feel like I should have been there for her. I am anxious now that I am going to hear that she's gone. I keep trying to distract and not send her so many messages, but I am still checking in with her. I don't know what to do. I've seen most of your videos about suicide but I can't shake this feeling. I'm scared to talk to her about it. Thanks for the help (:

Hailey

Hey, so I've been feeling recently that when im around people everythingthey say and do is amplified as if they're in my mind and I feel like I need to explode but they won't go away. I was on a bus and all the noises from people felt like it was really loud and I kinda wanted to shout but I couldn't. Like too many stimuli or something.idk how to describe it but it's just me feeling really anxious but I don't really think this has happened before.

Amy

What do you do if your psychiatrist and friends are telling you one thing but your intuition is telling you another? I want to start coming off my antidepressants but my psychiatrist said definitely not to do this at the moment. My friends say "listen to the psychiatrist" but I really do feel ready to start reducing my medication (in a safe way). Do I ignore what I feel is right inside and just go with the view of the professional?? Isn't part of getting better involve starting to trust yourself again?

Hailey
>>4228874

Like everything is too much and I don't want people to touch me or come near me or anything

Rachel B

unfortunately i won't be able watch this livestream live, but i was wondering if it is important to talk about religion in therapy. I do talk about it sometimes bc being Jewish is a such a major part of who I am, but I tend to feel weird about it because we don't share the same beliefs (even though she is v respectful)

Hailey
>>4228895

Omg I'm like that too I barely talk about the fact I'm Jewish I think because frankly it doesn't mean much to me and it's more of something I have to do than I want to...

Christina Martin

Hi Kati I was wondering if it is normal to become paranoid and hear voices with depression. I am not one to watch scary movies but my sister loves them and a couple of weeks ago I went past the room and a woman was screaming on the tv. I immediately started in a panic attack and ran back to my room. I calmed down but since then I have become paranoid and I have not had this before and sometimes I think I hear things that I'm not sure of. I start to panic even thinking about that woman screaming even though I know it is just a movie

swiftymichelle

Hi Kati! I'll probably watch this stream later, it will be 1 AM here and I will be attending a wedding tomorrow, YAY! :) I have just one "problem" which I wanted to discuss with you, I'm always so worried that I'll lose some of my closest family (to death), like my parents or my grandmother and I feel so devastated about it, what can I do to "ease" this situation, like how not to think about it all the time? Thanks love you xo

Letitia.L

Heya Kati, i met this girl online through talklife. I've been trying to help her get through some things. She messages me everyday. I've told her she needs to start telling her therapist what she tells me because there is only so much that i can do, but she said i'm the only one she trusts. I feel like she is becoming attached and i don't what to say to her without hurting her. Also recently with things going on with my life i told her i needed some space and she reacted badly. Was i being selfish? I really want to help but i'm also not doing the best.

Tina

Hey Kati, I have chronic physical illnesses and lately I've been unwell. That's of something that my team still hasn't been able to diagnose and all tests keep coming up normal. I just feel like something isn't right. It has gotten to a point that I am even hoping something shows up on the test. Is that normal thing to hope for?! And also, it's making me feel really helpless the more we don't have a direction regarding this, and really affecting mood - any advice? Thanks! Xx

Jess Campbell

My question is can we be subconsciously attention seeking? That is can we be utilizing attention seeking behaviour in the eyes of others without realizing that we are doing it? And how do you deal with people accusing you of attention seeking behaviours if you don't know you are doing them?

Lanis

My question is that I have ptsd bipolar n voices I'm on meds but can't afford a psychologist n a therapist expel hilly a one that does specialty I've done the book on seal abuse but how can I stop the voices the flag backs n the panic attacks I know I have a lot of issues but I have no one to talk to

Aqueda Veronica

Hello Kati, I am considering subscribing for online therapy. Any things I should keep in mind or tips? Thank you and cheers from Estonia :)

Aqueda Veronica

Also, on an unrelated topic, can you please speak about gaslighting? Seems like people still don't understand this is a form of abuse so let's clear up some myths.

Megan Kiefer

Hey Kati! Do you have any advice on how to counter/temporarily overcome feelings of emptiness in a healthy way? I try to distract myself as much as possible and have just recently started therapy, but sometimes I can't help but get extremely depressed because of the empty feeling in my chest, and when I'm not distracted and the empty feeling comes back, it can at times be too much to bear and I'm not always sure how to overcome it so that I can be more functional day-to-day. Much love and thanks xoxo

Kayla Clare

Late post on my part - but any advice on what to do if you find rape threats that your father had sent your mother? Its just confusing and overwhelming and I'm not sure how to bring it up with my therapist or even if I should..

Holly Heilig

Can PCOS and Fibromyalgia feed SH urges and suicidal ideation ? Can you do a video on these diseases and mental health?

Elfie Ethereal

My question was, if you have any tips, if you are not sure if you are actually physically sick, because depression is making you feel bad all the time to the point where you can't tell if you have a flu or something or is it all psychosomatic, because of the mental illness. And I have a fear of doctors so I can't keep going there often and I often feel they are angry at me, because they never find anything and it's all psychosomatic and I have bothered them in vain. And the whole health care system is a you have to shout to be heard kind of place, but I have problems doing that, because I don't feel sure of my symptoms and dissociate.

Rachel Ilhan

HEY KATIIIII my questions is, how to get out of the routine of weighing myself every morning, everynight, after and before eating? Thank you, xxx

Courtney Powell

Howdy Heyyyyyyy! Kati, my psychiatrist wants to dx me with BPD. My DBT therapist says BPD is the same as complex PTSD. I haven’t found any reputable information about that on Google. What is your opinion on it being the same? She said this means it’s recoverable. Please share your insight!

Courtney Powell

PS- who uses more hair products; Kati or DapperRapper

Shi Hart

Hi kati Would you ever consider doing information on the effect of physical disability and mental illness? I have Cerebral palsy and depression and anxiety. Sometimes I have trouble with my legs/ moving, I wonder if this affects my mental illness?

Melanie Paul

I can't imagine keeping up my will to survive to progress into different stages of my life (I don't know if that makes sense, but like post-college and becoming like a real adult and eventually getting old and what not). Do you think this is just the whole "sense of foreshortened future" thing popping up again, or my depression making me hopeless, or something else? Also I was basically verbally attacked by a girl with borderline when I was in IOP (an absolutely terrifying experience for me) and now I'm in a DBT group that has a girl with borderline in it who acts very similarly to the way the girl in IOP acted. I know it's not fair to the girl in my group, but she kind of terrifies me because I feel like she's going to start yelling names at me like the other girl did. Is there a way I could separate the two in my mind and should I let the facilitator know this? Thank you! <3

Hannah d

Hi kati. I was diagnosed With disocation. I'm struggling with this because I find myself disconnected a lot and staying that way for a couple of days. I can't distinguish the difference between my self and my disocated self anymore.

Manda Mandrell
>>4229472

I'm am totally in a situation so similar! That should be a video.. KATI! What to do when people/friends see too attached to your help/advice.

Hanna Karlsson

Hi, how can I deal with being inpatient (I'm not in a hospital, it's lika a residential treatment center)? I'm here because of autism and trauma/dissociation. There are so many things that frustrates me. I find it very difficult to live with all these people all the time and staff always around. There are so many noises and people to close and very often being angry and a lot of very loud discussions/shouting/threatening to hit others and so on. Even if I spend the most time in my room it's like I can't be alone cause I hear it all anyway. Also there's almost nothing to do. I have to stay here, I'm not allowed to do things out of here, but there's no activities, groups or anything. I have a dbtsession once a week and that's it. The rest of the time I mostly just lay in my bed trying to occupy myself with watching series, reading and stuff. Also most of the staff is very undereducated and walks away when things get to tough to deal with, most of them don't even know what dissociation is. One person said she would read a book (coping with trauma related dissociation), but she hasn't. I'm just so frustrated. I'm waiting (have been waiting since november) to se a trauma specialist but don't know how to be able to stay here just because of trauma therapy once a week. I want to go home but then I can't get trauma treatment (there's not much of it here i Sweden). Everyone says I need to be here. I need this level of care, but it feels like I'm just angry all the time. There is no care? No "real" treatment. Most of them don't even know what my diagnosis means, then how can they help? I don't know what to do. I'm not allowed to choose where to go because of the rules, the social services choose for you. So it's either to stay here or go home to my apartment where I wont receive therapy at all (I'm to ill to go outpatient they say). I feel so trapped. Don't know what to do. Have talked to the staff here about how I feel but all they say is "you are free to go if that's what you want". Any advice on how to deal with it all would be very much appreciated. Thank you! (Sorry for the long post)

Morgan Curtis

I wish it was a little easier to try to say to foo that I don't want to talk or hang out with them. I have come to realize I really don't want to be around them but then my reactions are trying to keep the peace. The last time I talked to them I realized I had two voices in my head (it was weird to me). One screaming not to talk to them and trying to say I don't want to hang out with you. The second voice which I actually followed was let me check if it's possible basically anything that tries to keep the peace. Is there any suggestions to help myself be at peace with this choice I want so I can actually follow through? I hope I make sense. Thanks

Kati Morton
>>4228667

Hey Anne :) I am so sorry that you are struggling so much right now.. do you think you could tell your therapist? I would start with that.. maybe write a letter or email to tell her?? They can help you figure out how to tell your family.. but know that it will be okay. As long as they know why you are taking a break (because you are struggling so much) and your therapist can even withdrawal you from uni properly so that it doesn't effect your gpa etc. I would start with your therapist and then have them help you figure out how you want to tell your family. xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4228696

I would reach back out and see what's taking so long!! It's okay to check back in. It does sometimes take me a week to get back to someone on scheduling just because I need to see some of my clients to see if I can move them around.. but I would reach out again and ask to set up that next appt :) If she doesn't reply to that in a few days I would look for someone else xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4228722

The transition from a program out into real life can be really hard.. I know I talked about this on the livestream but just remember to use your tools and supports that worked while in treatment. I know you don't have groups and stuff all day like you used to, but you still know what helps.. (ie. journaling, calling a friend, doing a craft, etc). Make sure you make time to still do those things. xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4228752

YAY!! That's amazing :) The best way to prepare is to write down what it is you struggle with and what you want to work on. As for a routine.. I think as long as you are doing your self care things and making time to try out your new therapy techniques you are good to go :) xoxo When you go for your first appt I would make sure you let her know what symptoms you feel are hardest to control so she can offer up some tips for that :) But make sure you keep doing what has helped you in the past.. and that helps you feel a bit better. Maybe just showering and listening to music.. whatever it is, keep doing it :) xxoo I hope that helps some honey!

Kati Morton
>>4228812

Hey Manda :) Sorry it took me so long to get through these questions.. the truth is that these thoughts aren't as bad as before.. make sure you let them know that. And in truth, having thoughts of suicide isn't uncommon and shouldn't stop them from seeing you. I think it's important for you to know that you can tell them about the thoughts before they get any worse.. I honestly think if you told them what you told me they would be fine with it. Therapy only works when we feel we can tell our team what we are going through..and truthfully you are doing much better!!! xoxo Keep me posted okay? xo

Kati Morton
>>4228874

Have you ever been assessed for a sensory processing disorder?? This is something I am still learning a lot about.. but from what a few of my clients have said it feels exactly like what you said (like everything is just too much). It could also just be due to being overwhelmed about other things in life.. but I would bring this up with your therapist asap so they can offer some help and tools to make it better :) xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4228883

I would keep talking with your psychiatrist about it.. and it's okay to ask him why he thinks you need to stay on it still.. then feel free to offer up why you disagree. Usually (in my experience) they will let you go down on your dose for a bit and see how you feel first.. so that you don't withdrawal or feel terrible all of a sudden. I would bring it up again.. because going off of medication without your doctors consent can be tricky. xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4228895

If it's important to you.. it will be important to your therapist :) If you feel it would play into your therapy and certain things you want to talk about.. then you can definitely bring it up!! As a therapist, I just don't bring it up unless my clients do because I don't want to assume anything about it.. if that makes sense :) xxoo

Bridget Arndt
>>4228722

Thanks Kati! I still have one weekly group that I'm using. I've caught a cold which isn't helping my motivation right now.

Kati Morton
>>4229078

Some people do get paranoia and/or hear voices when they have psychosis with their depression.. but what happened to you doesn't sound like that. It sounds like you were overly scared.. if not traumatized by what you saw. I would take some time to talk about it (even if it feels a bit silly) and even journal about why it scared you so much.. and keep doing that until these symptoms go away. xoxo Cause they will. <3

Kati Morton
>>4229271

Have you watched any of my videos about thought stopping?? Or even my one about pure O OCD.. check those out :) I think they will really help <3 xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4229472

In truth.. you were not being selfish at all!!! You have to take care of yourself first.. and if she was a true friend she would see that. Know that you do not have to message her back.. you can say that you have to take a break in order to take care of yourself, and then leave it at that. I know it's hard but we are only responsible for ourselves and you know that you need a break.. cause you are struggling.. so take that break. She does need to start telling her therapist and she does have other support, so know that it's not your fault and it's actually up to her to take control of her own recovery. xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4229734

Of course that's normal to hope for!! We want to know what it is that's making us feel so bad. I would definitely make sure you get in to see your therapist or psychiatrist so you have someone to talk to about this. Also, keep pushing for more tests and assessments.. I have heard from a lot of people that that's how they found out what was going on.. and that in conjunction with therapy should help you feel a bit better :) also, I hope my Monday video was helpful too <3

Kati Morton
>>4230275

I would give the one that doesn't specialize a try.. if that's our only option, it's worth a try :) Cause just having a safe place to talk about it can really help :) xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4230429

Definitely! This is actually on my video list.. I just have to do a bit more research on it :) xox

Kati Morton
>>4230545

Hey Megan :) Is there anything healthy that helps fill the void?? Like time with friends or doing some self care things? Cause that can definitely help.. but the truth is that this feeling usually comes from our depression and therapy and medication together will get rid of it the quickest. If you haven't looked into those options.. I would talk with your therapist about it :) Oh and also, something that helped a clients of mine in the past was writing down things she wanted to recover for.. sort of like goals, but more like things she just wanted to do. She put them up and read them each morning and night.. That helped her a bit :) oxox

Kati Morton
>>4231189

I would definitely bring it up with your therapist! That way you have a safe place to talk about it.. and all that comes up for you because of it. Trust me, they aren't going to do anything, just listen and help you process through it. Even if you have to write it down.. or just show her this post.. you will feel so much better having someone to talk to about it :) xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4231402

Start small :) Like not doing it one day until noon.. and then until 3pm.. and keep pushing it for as long as you can until you can go a whole day :) Start with those small goals and it will add up to success :) xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4231382

Hey Elfie :) I am so sorry you are going through this! Have you talked to a therapist or psychiatrist?? The best way to know if we are physically sick or mentally struggling is to notice if our symptoms only come up when we feel like shit. If you can feel emotionally good but still feel sick, then you need to go to the doctor.. if it's the other way around, then I would see if you can get into see a therapist or psychiatrist :) xoxo I hope that helps!! Just know that no matter where you symptoms are coming from you deserve to feel better and get proper treatment. xox

Kati Morton
>>4231871

They are very much the same.. you can check out my videos on each topic (I have one for C-PTSD and BPD) and you can see that they present very much the same. xoxo But I think they need to have different diagnosis because their origins can be very different.. if that makes sense. xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4234341

I would definitely talk to the facilitator about that worry.. cause your response is normal and something that they should be able to help you work through :) As for the lack of energy and will to keep going, it's normal to get really tired and worn out in treatment.. but it could also be your depression getting worse (that's such a common depressive symptom) so I would bring that up with your therapist so you can talk about it and decide what your next best step is :) xxoo

Kati Morton
>>4234777

Have you checked out my videos on dissociation and maladaptive day dreaming?? I really think those will help :) xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4235504

Hey Hanna :) I am SO sorry that you have to be stuck there! Since this is the only way you are able to get the help that you need and hopefully finally see a trauma specialist, can you bring in things to work on?? Like bring in your own workbooks, and coloring books or projects you would like to work on?? So you keep your days busy and feel like you are working on something?? There are some great books & workbooks out there ( I have my recommended list on my website) as well as my free workbooks for SH & ED & LGBTQ... I would try to fill your days with those sorts of things so it's not so frustrating for you :) I hope that helps honey.. and I hope you get to see someone soon!!

Kati Morton
>>4242895

Hey Morgan, if I am understanding you fully.. I really would watch my videos on dealing with toxic people and my other videos on boundaries :) They should help a lot!! You can just search for "kati morton boundaries" on youtube and they should all pop up :) xoxo

Kati Morton
>>4247566

Have you talked about why it really is you don't like the group with your team?? Cause it sounds like it's more the group idea itself that you don't like rather than this particular group.. It could be that sharing and hearing from others is hard and uncomfortable for you? Or maybe you just dont like sharing in front of others? I would talk this out in therapy because group can be so beneficial but we have to be invested in it. So if you talk this out, really think about why you don't want to go, and still decide it's not best, then I wouldn't go anymore. I am a firm believer in groups because it gives us a time to practice saying things out loud to a group and being supported.. it can be really validating and healing. xoxo

Hanna Karlsson
>>4235504

I did your self harm workbook a few years ago, when I was still at home :) I will check the LGBTQ out! I actually have a skills workbook for trauma/dissociation, kind of gave it up though, but I'll start trying to do it again. And I got the date for starting trauma therapy today, I'll start in the beginning of april, so just have to hang in there a little bit longer :) Thank you!

Melanie Paul
>>4234341

Thank you! I have another group with the same facilitator tonight, so I'll talk to her about it then. I also have an appointment with my therapist tonight, so I can go over the depression stuff too. So good timing for the response! :)

Mags
>>4228752

Started making lists under those topics. Had a super hard day today but had my support worker take me to a drop in after she saw me, went for a tea after with some people I knew from a group I attended who also happened to drop in, one of them was kind enough to walk me to the bus and wait with me. It's a short walk home but I'm not tempting fate at the moment as a couple of weeks ago I had a pretty bad bout of dissociation trying to do that. I really think the spring coming in is helping. The structure I'm being asked to encorporate really scares me, that I'll be overwhelmed but I'm always willing to try so I'm trying. Still waiting for my letter but should be soon now. Thanks for all your support and encouragement xx

Shi Hart
>>4231936

That would be great thanks. I'm not sure if you know about cerebral palsy. But it basically because of damage to the cerebral cortex, it affects all four of my limbs, as a result i'm wheelchair bound. This is why I want to support you on patreon, I believe in education not matter what it is. It helps reduce stigma and discrimination, so thank you =)

Morgan Curtis
>>4242895

Hi Kati, I don't know if you will see this but I wanted to let you know, Thank you for replying with your video recommendations. It was good to watch them. It has been hard going through this process and it is not easy even though I (the real me) knows that my decision is to cut off contact. Every time i time i think about it my anxiety gets going. I am working on it with T. T says I'm not ready to completely cut off just yet. Again, Thank you! I will share more later. I hope you enjoy your travels. :)