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Hey folks. Just letting you know I'm still alive and working on both the Digital Extreme contract and the elected fanfic. I am, as a matter of fact, looking over it to make some corrections and improve the flow of the story (and the prose.)

In the meantime, here's a snippet that I wrote for JonBerry's AU fanfic 'A New Jedi in an Old Republic.' I found myself enjoying delving into Coruscant's infrastructure, and along with the cancelled Star Wars 1313, was inspired to write the first draft of 'Through the Shadow and the Flame'.

Here it is, warts and all:

....

A moment of hope flitted across Anakin's face. “Together?” Finally he

could see what was bothering him, and in a moment, all his lies were

laid bare before him. “Actually, Master Katarn. Miss Ors? There is

something I would like to talk to you about. Privately. And that you

promise that not a word of it goes back to the Council, or Obi-wan.”

Jan and Kyle looked confused at each other before Jan ceded the choice

to him with a shrug. “Sure, I think. What did you need help with?”

The three of them had relocated back from the still-in-progress cockpit

to the work area and sleeping benches. Anakin sat on one side while Kyle

and Jan took the other. Once the rear hatch was closed, Anakin started

to fidget as he tried to find someplace to begin.

“Calm down,” Jan said, reaching for some Caf to heat up. “You asked for our help, and we're going to give it. Right, Kyle?”

“Yeah,” Katarn said as he put away his weapons. “Anakin,” he recognized

that in his mind 'Skywalker' was Luke, so he defaulted to the young

man's first name. “Something's bothering you, and if you're coming to us

instead of Obi-Wan, it has to be quite serious.”

“It is,” Anakin said as he accepted the drink with both hands. “I... I am afraid that I am to be punished.”

“For what?” Kyle said, taking the lead on the Jedi business.

"I..." Anakin suddenly realized what he was about to do: admitting to

two strangers he barely knew of his breach of the Jedi Code. He would

not be the only one to suffer should word spread: Padmé had explained to

him the need for secrecy. Her career would be ruined by a scandal. But

Anakin needed help, needed to resolve his somehow, so he told them the

truth... from a certain point of view. "I am married."

There had been an akward pause where Anakin had expected understanding to immediately dawn on Katarn's face.

"And?" asked Jan, finally. "I mean, congratulations, but I don't see why Obi-Wan would give you grief over something like this."

"...You mean, you do not know?" asked Anakin, who suddenly felt a tight

coil of emotions come unfurling into streams of fear, worry, and fear.

"How can you not?! The Jedi Code forbids attachments, and marriage is

probably the worst offence of all! I mean... Of course, how COULD you

know?! Your order practically allows you to FLAUNT your union while

my... they..." Anakin began to hold back tears, and felt sheer guilt for

not being able to keep his emotions in check.

There is no emotion.

There is no passion.

Serenity.

Please, I need Serenity!

"Hey," Katarn's tone was soothing, filled with understanding. His hand

on Anakin's shoulder seemed to emanate a wave of relief, and Anakin

thought for a moment that Katarn was using some variant of what mundanes

referred to as the Mind Trick... He allowed the 'force technique' to

soothe him, though he found that that coil of emotions was still there,

much to his disappointment. "Calm down, slow down... and let's talk."

Kyle motioned at Anakin to take a seat at the edge of one of the bunks,

while he pulled a small crate of thermal detonators and took a seat in

front of him. Jan handed Kyle a cup of Caf, and the Knight Errant

intended to give it to the young Jedi.

Just as soon as he's done cradling his face,

thought Kyle.

"I've made a terrible mistake," said Anakin, finally.

"I get that," said Kyle. "I take it 'getting married' is not he sort of thing that the Jedi Order is willing to let slide."

"No," said Anakin, as he accepted the cup. "The Code warns against any

and all kinds of attachments, as they may lead to the dark side when

they inevitably end." And from his experiences, Anakin knew that this

was true: When Anakin's mother died in his arms, his rage had driven his

saber in the hearts of every single Tusken raider in sight, and when it

subsided he had coldly left their wives and children to starve and die

in the desert. What was such hate, if not of the dark side?

"Well, if you understood that, why did you go and get married?" asked

Kyle. "As you said, as far as attachments go, that's kind of a big

deal."

"I love her..." said Anakin. "Is that not the sort of thing you do, when you are in love?"

"Well, she must be someone very special if you're willing to go so far as break one of your vows."

"She is." Anakin smiled. "She is beautiful and graceful..."

Uh oh, thought Kyle. This is starting to sound more like infatuation than love.

"...and brave, and driven, and smart... she loves peace, and is not afraid to fight for it."

"Ah, okay. Another Jedi?" asked Kyle a bit relieved that Anakin thought of this girl as something OTHER than a pretty face.

"...No," said Anakin, after a moment's hesitation. Jan thought that was

strange: after seeing how insular the Jedi Order was, she concluded that

there shouldn't be much opportunities for romance outside of it.

He must have met on her on one of his missions,

Jan

realized. "I'm sorry," continued Anakin. "I've already said too much

about her, and I must keep her identity a secret, if not our union."

"I understand," said Kyle. "So, let's assume the Council finds out..."

Anakin's eyes widened. "You... you promised!"

"And we'll keep that promise," Kyle reassured him. "You can count on that."

"But," added Jan, "secrets have a way of coming out, sometimes at the

worst possible moments. If that happens, what would happen next."

Anakin stared into his cup. "I would be called before the Council,

and..." Anakin gave it some thought, "and the Council would be lenient,

and understanding, but they would make a demand of me. They would demand

that I sever all ties with my wife, or be expelled from the Order."

"...And you'd rather not have to choose," said Kyle. "You'd rather have your love, and keep your knighthood."

"...Yes," admitted Anakin, shamefully. "Is that so terrible? Is that

impossible? Look at you two! You're in love, I can see it! All can see

it! And yet you are, still a Jedi! There has to be a way!"

"No," said Kyle, shaking his head. "There isn't."

"But..."

"The Council made me a Knight-Errant, sure, but I'm still technically an

outsider to their Order. They're likely letting my relationship with

Jan slide on account of that, but how would they feel if I were to start

preaching that they should abolish their 'no attachments' rule, they'd

likely ask me to leave and never come back."

Anakin couldn't bring himself to disagree. He had arguments with Obi-Wan

before, concerning just that, and he always shut them down by reminding

him that such talk would cause him to be expelled.

"And then there's you, one of their youngest and finest knights. They

won't make an exception for you: if they do, other romantics in the

Order will be encouraged and start coming out of the woodwork. That's

going to cause problems, and division in the ranks..." Kyle sighed.

"Honestly, in a better world, the Jedi would understand that attachments

aren't the bogeyman they think they are, that while loss and heartbreak

can put you in a dark place..." he looked at Jan, and remembered how he

thought about those dark days when he thought he had lost her, and how

it had set him on the path of stopping a resurgence of dark jedi.

"...they can also make you a stronger person, and alter your destiny for

the better. But that's not going to happen, at least not in your

lifetime."

"...Then tell me, Master Katarn... what must I do, if the Council won't compromise on this?"

Kyle thought about it for a moment and said: "Ask yourself: is being a

Jedi worth giving up on your marriage? Ask yourself: is your love worth

sacrificing your career as a knight over?"

"I... I don't know what the right answer is!"

"There is no right answer. But you'll have to meditate on it."

"But... I don't know if I can! I mean, leaving theOrder? I've

dedicated my life to becoming a Jedi Knight! If I were to leave now, or

ever, I... I can't even begin to imagine a life outside of the Order!"

Jan took a deep breath, and sighed. "Get up," she commanded, "Come with

me." Anakin obeyed her, and followed her to the Raven's cockpit. "Look

outside, and tell me what you see."

Anakin obeyed. "I see the skyline of Coruscant. It's lovely, but... what of it?"

"And what's happening in the skyline, in the buildings?" she asked.

Anakin thought that this was getting annoyingly close to a Jedi Master's

lesson, and braced himself for some frustrating, enigmatic vagueness.

He was surprised, then, when Jan followed up with:

"I'll tell you. Over there there's a Hydroponics technician planning the

next harvest. Over there in that truck there's a pilot who's hauling

food and medicine to a hospital. In that hospital there is a doctor with

his hands deep in someone's insides, trying to save a life. There are

countless other people in that horizon... and do you know what they all

have in common?

They don't use the force.

And yet, here they are, existing."

"You say this as if I don't understand that."

"You mean you do? Why then, is it so hard to imagine a life outside the

Order? Or is it because you can't stand the idea of becoming a Jedi

Farmer?"

"What Jan means is," interrupted Kyle, before Jan went just a little too

far, "is that your life won't end if you choose love over the order.

There's a whole world right outside your window, waiting for you. And

who knows, you might even prefer that life."

Anakin shook his head. "There is a war to fight. I cannot be so selfish as to simply leave the order in its time of need..."

"Then join the military," suggested Jan. "There's other ways to serve the Republic than with a lightsaber."

"But the Order... I owe them so much!" Anakin protested.

"This is the REPUBLIC, not the EMPIRE!" shouted Jan in frustration. "You

are not a SLAVE! You're free to decide what to do with your life, and

if the Council has a problem with that they can go to hell!"

"Jan..." Kyle began, but the pilot would have none of it.

"I have to go!" Jan stormed off, leaving both Kyle and Anakin shocked and confused.

"Did... Did I say something wrong?" asked Anakin, with genuine concern.

"Nah, she's just... a bit stressed, herself. I'll go talk to her. You stay here and think about what we've said, alright?"

"Yes, Master Katarn."

"Oh, and for the last time, it's just Kyle."

Katarn left Anakin alone in the cockpit. The young Jedi sat in the

pilot's seat. After a while, he took out his lightsaber with his flesh

and blood hand, and stared at it. He could feel the power emanating from

it, the potential power that slept in the energy cell, the artificial

crystal alive in the force. Then, he withdrew his mechanical hand, still

aching with the occasional bout of phantom pain. That was the only time

when he could truly perceive it as part of himself with the force, but

otherwise it was dead in it. And yet... and yet it existed, and made his

life considerably easier.

Anakin stared at both the saber and his hand, as he kept struggling with

the choice he would have to make. He hoped that time would be far and

away, but the whirring servos in his mechanical hand reminded him that

not all things go the way you want them to.

—

"Jan?" Kyle found his pilot outside the landing ramp, smoking to chill her nerves. "Wow, I thought you quit the Tabak."

"...Is this how it all began, Kyle?" asked Jan, as smoke from her mouth

was swept up by the wind. "Billions dead in the name of... Billions

dead! Just because of some, some KID who couldn't get his SHIT

together?!"

"Sobering, ain't it?"

"I just... I just can't wrap my head around this."

"It's not like this hasn't happened before. Luke's found a lot of

similar incidents in some holocrons, where a Jedi went completely nuts

over the death of a loved one, or even less than that. If Anakin loves

that girl as deeply as he claims... then yeah.

This

is how it all began." And stopping it... might even be as simple as sitting down with that kid and talking his problems out.

"...How close were you to falling, when Desann 'killed' me?"

"...I won't lie. I came close. Honestly, I don't know what would have

happened if Desann had actually done it. Finding out you were alive...

it gave me hope. Kept me from falling over."

"...Maybe I should convince him to annul his wedding," suggested Jan.

Kyle shook his head. "That's not going to work, at least not for long.

People form attachments despite themselves. He'd just come to care about

someone else. Could be a comrade in arms. Could be some girl he bumps

into. Could be a drinking buddy. Doesn't look like the Jedi Code has

prepared him to deal with that."

"Doesn't seem to me that the Code prepares the Jedi for real life."

"Makes sense. The whole light side and dark side dichotomy... the

philosophy. It's easy to embrace one over the other in the confines of a

monastery, safe from the world outside. Nothing is ever that simple

though... Aw, Sithspit! Look at me and all the 100 credit words."

An awkward silence fell between the two, as they considered the implications of what was said.

"So, Jedi Farmer?" said Kyle, breaking the tension.

Jan laughed. "Heh, yeah, there's a mental image."

"It's not that unbelievable," said Kyle, smiling. "Green Jedi grow their own food, I'm told."

"Do they? That's..." Jan Ors' expression became confused for a moment. Then, she asked. "Kyle, what do the Jedi eat?"

"...Food?" replied Kyle, wondering where that came from all of a sudden.

"I know, but where does it come from?"

"That's... huh. I don't know. I assumed the Jedi grow it, being basically monks. Figured they have gardens, or something."

"There's no way that's enough for their numbers. They'd need tons of it, every day."

"Why is this..."

"Anakin!"

Kyle turned around to see Anakin coming down the ramp, who still looked a

bit worried. "Ms. Ors," he said, "I apologize, I went on about my own

problems, I failed to consider—"

"— Nevermind that," interrupted Jan. "Anakin, what do the Jedi eat?"

"Um... food?" replied Anakin, as if he had been asked a fairly stupid question. Kyle couldn't help but snicker a bit, at that.

"Yes, but where does it COME from?" she insisted.

"Well, that's simple! It comes from... um..." Anakin scratched his head.

"I just realized that I have absolutely no idea. Perhaps Master Kenobi

knows?"

—

"Oh, the kitchen droids are tasked with preparing our food," answered

Obi-Wan, as if Jan Ors had asked the silliest question ever.

"Yes, but where does it come from?" insisted Jan, getting a bit frustrated.

"Well, that's simple! It..." Obi-Wan was about to give an answer, and

then realized that he had none to give. "This is embarrassing... I have

absolutely no idea."

"You buy it, right?" suggested Kyle.

"Oh, no. The Jedi Code forbids us from pursuing mercantile ventures.

Thus, we have no money to buy food with... which, now that you mention

it, makes your question all the more intriguing. Perhaps Master Paratus

knows? He is in charge of the droids, after all..."

—

Paratus opened his mouth, and sat at his workbench, mouth agape, as he

came to the realization that he had no idea where the food came from,

either. So he guessed. "The gardens, perhaps?"

"That's where our medicinal plants come from," said Obi-Wan. "There are a few

Almakia

trees in the grove, but they can only produce so much fruit."

"Hm..." Paratus used one of his extra mechanical arms to scratch his

chin. "Come to think of it, I didn't build those kitchen droids. I

didn't even program them: I just keep them functional and wipe their

memory cores when the random bits start being a problem."

"You never had a look at their cores?" asked Anakin surprised and a bit shocked.

"Ever?"

"Keeping the training droids up to date takes up most of my time, and I

never had a complaint from anyone about the performance from the kitchen

droids..."

"That you know of," Anakin muttered under his breath. Kyle chuckled,

knowing just how bad droid-cooked food could be. Obi-Wan didn't approve

of Anakin's complaint, thinking that perhaps that trip to Theed had

spoiled him.

"Who sold you those droids?" asked Jan.

"Oh, we probably didn't buy them. I think they were donated to us by...

hold on a moment." Paratus fished out a datapad from a nearby pile of

parts, and accessed the Temple's databanks from there. "Ah, yes, Cencil

donated them about... oh, 200 years ago. They even came pre-programmed.

Obi-Wan refocused the conversation. "That doesn't quite answer the question of where the food comes from."

Paratus tapped instruction on his datapad, and waited."Nothing here

about where the food comes from." He shook his head. "Strange...Have you

thought about asking the droids themselves?" suggested Paratus. "They

do have to handle the food, after all."

Obi-Wan tried not to groan. "Must we?"

"Yes," said Jan. "This is important."

—

The kitchen droid stood there, waiting for the Jedi in front of it to move.

"Droid! Answer me!" ordered Obi-Wan.

Maker, I hate droids!

he thought.

Anakin cleared his throat. "It already did, Master."

"It just beeped and whistled at me!"

"I know. It said: the food comes from the train station."

"What train station?" asked Obi-Wan.

Anakin, to everyone's surprise, translated Obi-Wan's question in beeps and whistles.

"You speak

Binary

?" said Kyle.

"Of course I do," replied Anakin. "I've been working with droids since before i could talk."

"Damned impressive, that."

"Thank you," Anakin smiled. This was the first time anyone complimented

him on his skills with droids. Even Palpatine couldn't appreciate them,

often preferring to change to subject to Operas and the like. "I asked

the droid to take us to this train station."

—

An elevator ride down into the depths of Coruscant, just below the

temple, and the group found itself standing in the darkness of an

ancient repulsor rail station, built for the rapid transport of cargo.

Only their lanterns and the occasional flickering light provided any

illumination. Small, insect like maintenance droids skittered about,

wary of the newcomers.

"...I don't think I've ever been to this part of the temple," said

Obi-Wan, actually fascinated. "And this is part of the temple, make no

mistake. Look at the arches, and the tiles."

"You mean past the layer of cobwebs, dust and grime?" quipped Kyle.

"Something's coming," said Anakin, and soon enough the loud hum of a

repulsor train could be heard, fast approaching, heralded by a rush of

wind that kicked the dust up.

A line of cargo cars came through the tunnel's mouth, slowed down, and

stopped. The Kitchen droids, which had been standing there, came to life

and proceeded to enter the train and took out plastic crates full of

food, and stacked them on the dock, while simultaneously loading in

empty crates.

"What a piece of junk!" proclaimed Anakin, as he shone a light on the

old train engine. It was shabby, made mostly of bolted on plates and

industrial glue. It was a miracle it worked at all. "This is maintenance

droid work," he said, finally. "Shoddy, messy, and done for the sake of

doing it. It's obvious their cores need wiping, and soon, or they'll

turn this engine into a pile of greeble."

"Stuff's fresh," said Kyle, as he popped open a crate of vegetables.

"Damned shame you guys are letting the droids turn this into boiled

mush."

"Oh, don't get me started," said Anakin.

"Over here!" Obi-Wan called out. He shone a light on the side of one of the cargo pods. "That's a corporate sigil, is it not?"

"Logo," corrected Jan. "They're called logos. And this one's seen better

days... man, there's got to be centuries of wear and tear on those

things."

Anakin approached, and looked at the ruined logo. "...That looks

familiar." He shone a lantern on another car, finding its own ruined

logo, then another, and another, until he could mentally superimpose

them into something recognizable. "Czerka! Masters, this is the Czerka

logo!"

"You know of this company?" asked Obi-Wan.

Anakin nodded. "Watto often sent me and a few other children out into

the desert to scavenge for parts. Czerka hardware could be found all

over the place, once upon a time, and the few parts that remain still

fetch a good price, especially when properly restored. They made

everything from hyper-drives to moisture condensers."

Obi-Wan nodded. "Well, that's explains this mystery of ours. The Czerka

corporation is donating our food, and has automated the process to the

point that nobody remembers were it came from."

Anakin and Ors looked at each other meaningfully. Ors knew corporations

never did things out of the goodness of their hearts, and Anakin knew

that Czerka dealt in slaves, since his mother's slave anklet had a

Czerka logo on it. But not only that...

"I just remembered," said Anakin. "Czerka went out of business millenia ago."

—

"Well, this is a bit troubling," said Obi-Wan as they stepped into the

main hall. It was night outside, the glow globes covered the area with a

warm light. "I'll take this up with the Council as soon as possible. If

they can manage the time and resources, they'll have this investigated

further."

"No, I think you need to take this up with them RIGHT NOW," Jan insisted.

"It's hardly urgent." Obi-Wan was polite, but a bit dismissive.

"I'd say it's pretty urgent! Look, it's obvious someone is footing the

bill for the place, and I'm willing to bet that someone's on the Senate.

Hasn't the Senate been pressuring the Jedi Order to rush off into war?"

"They have," Obi-Wan gave Kyle a quick look. "But the Council saw wisdom

in your words, and has refused... Do you think the Senate will use what

we just discovered against us, somehow?"

"Of course they will! When politicians don't get exactly they want out

of someone, they look for a string to pull, and this would be the

perfect one!

Do exactly as we say, or starve

."

Obi-Wan shook his head. "It's not possible. Czerka's leadership is

effectively gone, and our food production and supply is automated. We

didn't even know it existed, up until half an hour ago, and it's safe to

assume the Senate knows nothing of it at all."

"Trust me, they're going to look, and even if they know about the food

supply," Jan held out her arms. "Who supplies the power for this place?

Who supplies the water? Who pays for them to do it?"

"Hate to say it, Kenobi," said Kyle. "But for folks without bank accounts, your place screams 'money money money'."

"...I have to admit," said Kenobi, "Ms. Ors does being up some troubling

questions. But regardless of the answer, I do not believe that the

Senate would stoop so low as to cut off our support and supplies simply

because we're not willing to—"

It was just then that the lights went out, and the fountains stopped working.

"...Oh no," muttered Obi-Wan in quiet horror.

"Like she said," commented Kyle. "Politicians."