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The 20,000 Calorie Challenge: Full Draft (Patreon)

Published:
2023-01-29 23:39:21
Imported:
2026-06
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  • 20000CalorieChallenge_RoughDraft.pdf

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Content

Okay so I think I've finished my first full draft of this story, but I think I want to make some edits in places.  You feedback would be very helpful in this regard.  Let me know what you think of this one, I'll touch it up and move on to the next one.  This update is a little under 2,400 words, new content mostly starts at the bottom of page 16.

Sincerely,

Polaris

Comments

Rune Ebsen

Great story, only thing I would have added was other people reaction to her weight, like her sister or others

BS Writer

I think the biggest piece that is missing is a bit that brings her sister back in. Maybe and epilogue where her sister pranks her when she fails at dieting.