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Fed Up: Part 15 (Full draft) (Patreon)

Published:
2024-01-01 01:42:16
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

Alright, I still need to give this another readthrough and edit for grammar but I'm out of time tonight since it's new years eve and I've got plans I need to get to.  But the full chapter is finished.  I'll add some more polish to this in the future before I make a post of it on DA, if it is a substantial update (after I get piengoo's feedback) I'll repost it here.  If nothing major changes, I might just update this post with a cleaner draft.

This update is a little over 4,000 words.  I hope you enjoy!  And have a happy new year! Feedback as always would be lovely.

Thanks for all your support this year, it has really made a positive impact on my life every month.  You all are the best!  I appreciate any and all the support you give me. 

-Polaris

Comments

Rune Ebsen

Feel like there should have Been and ending with the entire friend group, however excellent work

polarisdreamer
>>126109853

Piengoo and I are thinking an epilogue that focuses on providing resolution for the group might be a good idea to cap off this story.

BlommStarr

This was awesome. Damn fine writting. Really well done and well executed conflict. Love the dynamic between HedI and her mother and law. I will say, I agree with the above comments. It does feel like there should be a bit more to cap off and wrap up the excellent story. The ending does feel a bit sudden. Though that being said, I think you wrapped up the central theme of the story really well (HedI’s struggle with her husband around weight). There are other pieces that would be good fan service to touch on that I’m sure all readers of this story would love to see (IE The supporting cast of characters, How Hedi’s personal relationship with her weight lands, if she still cares about trying to lose/maintain weight or if she gives up on that, etc). But yeah, maybe an epilogue would hit home as it seems you were planning.