More Shades of Being[A FtM and MtF Race Change Story] - Prologue (Patreon)

This story is a sequel to my series Different Shades of Being! I hope you enjoy it!

Saanvi and Soraya have spent nineteen blissful years embracing their new lives as Indian women. But when their world is suddenly upended as they are thrust back into their former identities as Kayden and Henry. Meanwhile, Soraya’s son, Arjun, who knows nothing of their past, embarks on a desperate search to find his mother and sister, uncovering unexpected truths about himself along the way.

Prologue

Soraya muttered a curse in Hindi as she smeared turmeric across the paper in front of her, painting a yellow thumbprint across the opening statements. 

“Maybe you can pretend it’s highlighter.” Manuel smiled, leaning over her shoulder.

“Highlighter that smells of curry?”

Manuel just laughed and pressed a soft kiss to her greying temple. “Maybe this is a sign, yet another sign, that you should retire properly.”

“I am retired,” Soraya said stubbornly. “They are just overworked at the moment and need a second set of eyes for these midterms.”

“That’s what you said last year.” Manuel chuckled before pulling away and glancing over the kitchen. “I think the rice is burning.”

“Damn!”

“This is why you shouldn’t work and cook at the same time!”

Soraya ran to the pot to find the rice cooking perfectly, not a char in sight and she shot her husband a sharp look. 

“Would you rather I wait until it actually started to burn?”

Soraya sighed and gave him a playful smile; she wasn’t about to admit he was right. But she did bundle away the papers; she could mark them in the morning, this meal was far more important. She had maybe half an hour until Arjun and Katie arrived and this meal had to go perfectly. It wasn’t every day that her son decided to bring a girl home. Manuel seemed to read her mind as she stirred the rice vigorously just to make sure it wasn’t burning. 

“I’m sure she’s lovely.”

“I’m sure she is.”

“Soraya…”

“I just don’t want him to rush into things, he’s barely in his twenties and he’s acting like he’s going to propose to this girl. A girl I have never even met!”

“Arjun has always been a private boy, you know that.”

“Too private.” Soraya clicked her tongue. “What sort of son keeps secrets from his mother? Saanvi told me everything…”

“She’s a girl, it’s different for boys. Now, stop stirring that pot before the rice flies out and onto the stove.”

Soraya sighed and set down the spoon. Deep down, she knew Manuel was right. Arjun had always been a good boy, sensitive, soft-spoken, and kind. Watching him grow up had been one of the greatest joys Soraya had ever had. But it was hard to let go and realise he was a man now. A man who had been seeing a woman seriously for months, without saying anything. And as joyful as she was at the prospect of seeing at least one of her children married, nobody was ever going to be good enough for her little boy. 

“Why don’t you go and get ready, you’ve been switching back and forth between reading and cooking all afternoon.”

“Manuel,” She said with mock scolding, “Are you trying to tell me I smell?”

“I would never, but there is flour in your hair.”

She let out a huff of laughter and patted her greying hair, feeling the flour between her fingers. 

“Fine. But call me if they arrive!”

She shuffled off to her room to get ready and carefully ran a brush through her greying hair to remove all the flour. She was in her mid-sixties now, life was quiet with Arjun and Saanvi out of the house, but Soraya was enjoying her twilight years. She and Manuel had both retired, officially, but she couldn’t stop herself from volunteering to help with marking now and again. After a lifetime of working as the head of English, it was hard to give up. She picked out her very favourite orange and green sari and smiled at her reflection. Her face had laugh lines on it, her dark hair had lightened to a dusky grey, and she had the curves of a mother who’d raised two children and never quite gotten her figure back. But she didn't mind; her body told the story of a life well lived. What did it matter if her breasts sagged a little with their weight now? It didn’t stop Manuel from thinking she was the most ravishing beauty in all the land. She was just putting on a spot of lipstick when she heard the front door open and a familiar voice rang out. 

“Mom? Manuel? I’m heeeeeere!”

She chuckled to herself. Saanvi was almost forty now, but that didn't stop her from calling out like a teen every time she came home. 

“Hello, dear!” She smiled, stepping back into the kitchen just as Saanvi placed down a bottle of wine.

She was looking well. Saanvi had grown into a fine, respectable young woman, with high cheekbones, sharp eyes and a knack for smiling in a way that knocked people for a loop. It served her well as a journalist; half the time, she didn't even have to ask questions, just smile and look at her interviewee knowingly, and they filled the silence with exclusives. She was dressed in a tight fitting, professional pantsuit with large golden earrings that shone against her long black hair. Red lips split into a smile and she opened her arms eagerly and wrapped Soraya in a warm hug and kissed her mother's cheeks. 

“It’s so good to be back here; it’s been such a hellish week.”

“Well, let’s open this bottle and you can tell us all about it.” Manuel grinned, and Soraya tutted at him.

“We need to wait for Arjun and Katie, this will be her first time meeting us. What sort of impression do you think we’ll give off if we start drinking without them?”

“Oh, Mom, you worry too much.” Saanvi sighed, “Things are casual now. It’s not like when you went to meet dad’s parents.”

It had been the single most nerve-wracking experience of her life, trying to impress her first set of in-laws; as it should be. People these days take love too casually, especially Saanvi. Soraya did wish her daughter would settle down, but that didn’t seem to be in the cards any time soon. 

“This is some good stuff!” Manuel whistled, picking up the bottle. “How did you afford this?’

“A bonus,” Saanivi winked, “For exposing that embezzlement scandal last week, some of my finest journalism. And I have done a lot of very fine journalism.”

“Saanvi, arrogance is unbecoming of a woman.” Soraya chided, but there was no venom in her voice. Truth be told, she couldn’t be prouder of her daughter. 

It was all she could do to stop from bursting every time she met up with friends, and they started bragging about their children. Maintaining a modest smile was almost painful when her daughter was so accomplished and beautiful. There was a knock at the door and suddenly, her heart began to race.

“That’s Arjun!” She gasped, “Is the food ready?”

“It’s wonderful.” Manuel massaged her shoulders for a moment, “Now, I will serve up while you go get the door.”

“Take it easy on the poor girl, won't you, mom?” Saanvi smiled as she leaned over the bench, “My last boyfriend almost had a heart attack when you gave him the third degree.”

“He wasn’t good enough for you.”

“Nobody is.” 

“Exactly.” 

Soraya straightened her back and headed for the door, schooling her features into that of a calm but intimidating mother. It was time for this Katie woman, really was, and if she was even remotely acceptable as a partner to her darling son. 

“Mom!”

“Arjun.”

The door swung open, revealing Arjun. He had grown into a handsome young man, with dark olive skin, curly dark hair that he kept a little longer than Soraya would have liked, and soulful brown eyes. He had all his mother's charm and his father’s good looks, and brains that were all his own. No wonder women fell over themselves trying to get him. She hugged her son and squeezed him tight enough that she heard his spine crack.

“Look at you!” She cooed, placing a hand on his soft cheek. “You’ve grown another inch.”

“Mom, no, I haven’t.” He laughed, “Anyway, this is Katie, Katie, this is my mom.”

Soraya looked the woman up and down; she was white, with blonde hair that looked more sunbleached than naturally pale and green eyes framed by dark lashes. She was dressed in jeans and a delicate-looking blue tank top that was cut just high enough to be considered modest. 

“Hello.” She smiled nervously, looking Soraya up and down. “I’m sorry I didn’t realise tonight would be formal, I...I wouldn’t have worn jeans.” 

Her voice had an accent Soraya couldn’t quite place. 

“Soraya.” She held out her hand, and Katie took his. “Come on in.”

Manuel was just laying out the food when they returned and Saanvi hugged Arjun and noogies his head.

“Ow! Hey! What are you, twelve?”

“Never too old to put my baby brother in his place.” She grinned, “And you must be Katie!”

“Oh my goodness, you’re…you’re Saanvi Singh!” She cried, “I…Arjun never mentioned that his sister was a famous reporter. Your story on that embezzlement scandal at the Fund for Hope was incredible. I can’t believe how well they hid it for so long!” 

Katie was breathless, practically balancing on the tips of her toes as she leaned forward in excitement, only to catch herself and quickly clear her throat in embarrassment. 

“I mean…nice to meet you.”

Manuel laughed, his full belly laugh that Soraya loved. She tried to straighten out her smile; Katie seemed sweet and earnest, without even meaning to, she had made a wonderful impression, but Soaraya couldn’t just admit that. It was her job as a mother and ‘old crone’ to be hard to win over! Saanvi seemed flattered and shook Katie’s hand. 

“I can tell you all about how I did the undercover work, but honestly, I am more interested in hearing about you! Come on, let’s eat. Mom’s cooking is to die for.”

Katie nodded eagerly and sat down next to Arjun. He was alternating between staring at her with utter adoration and giving them all warning glances. 

“I’m not very interesting.” Katie laughed nervously. “Not compared to Pulitzer Prize winning journalism.”

“She’s selling herself short.” Arjun insisted, “Katie is doing a double major in computer science and engineering. I’ve never met somebody who works harder.”

Soraya sighed. Arjun had that soft, love filled look in his eyes. This relationship was definitely serious. She wasn't sure how to feel about that. Saanvi always told her when she was going on dates; she’d never been good at keeping her love life a secret. But Arjun had been a totally different story. Even as a teenager, she’d never heard about his crushes or relationships. She only found out about his first girlfriend when they broke up after six months. It wasn’t that her son didn't trust her, he was just a private person and that bothered her. She was his mother, and she worried now that he was out of the house at college she would start to lose her closeness to her son. Getting any information was like prying teeth; hell, she’d only learned about Katie a week ago and it was clearly serious. Maybe they had been dating longer than Arjun said. 

“So Katie, what’s that accent of yours?” Saanvi asked and Soraya hissed.

“Saanvi! Don’t be rude, you know how much I hate getting that question…”

Secretly, though, she was glad. She had been wondering herself. 

“No, it’s fine.” Katie beamed, “I’m Australian. Came here on a scholarship program. In fact, that’s how Arjun and I met. He was at the sign-up event when I first arrived and I was selling Australia to other students. Thankfully, I’m not a very good saleswoman, because he decided to stay.”

“Wait, you were going to go on exchange?” Soraya blinked, “To Australia of all places, you never mentioned that!”

Arjun shrugged. “It didn't seem important.”

That’s what he always said. Soraya pouted, and she felt Manuel squeeze her knee under the table. The rest of the meal went well, Katie was a delight, no matter how much she didn’t want to admit it. Polite too, she ate everything without hesitation, even the spicy rice. She didn’t even sweat, a feat that made Manuel deeply impressed. 

She tried to figure out what else she’d been missing; if Arjun had considered leaving the country and not thought it worth mentioning, what else had he been up to? But his answers were short and sweet as usual, and he asked so many of his own the focus inevitably turned to Saanvi as it always did. She loved the spotlight, while Arjun was made for shadows. It was the way it had always been and the way the pair of them liked it, but Soraya felt her frustrations mounting. Was she losing her son? Is that…what he wanted? 

Soraya hugged her son extra tight as he and Katie left. “You know you can tell me anything, sweetheart.” 

“I know, Mom.”

“No, I mean it.” She said seriously, “I want to hear about your life when it's happening.”

He gave her a slightly confused smile and nodded. She could only hope he really did understand as she watched his car until it disappeared around the corner. A hand rested against her shoulder gently, and she turned to see Saanvi smiling at her. 

“Come on, Mom. Let’s do the dishes together.”

They washed in silence for a few minutes, and Soraya revelled in the normalcy of it. It had been so long since Saanvi had lived at home. It was nice having her daughter close again. Arjun had moved away to live on campus a year ago, and yet, she felt as though the distance between them had grown exponentially. 

“He’s doing well.” Saanvi said finally, “Katie seems nice.”

“Yes, she does.” Soraya stared into the soapy water, “I wish I’d known about her earlier…I feel like I only ever learn news about your brother long after it's happened. Does he not trust me?”

“No, Arjun is just… private. He keeps his cards close to his chest. It’s not just you, Mom. It’s Manuel and me too.”

“But why, I raised him the same as you and you never kept secrets…for long.”

Saanvi laughed. “I had my fair share; a mother can’t know everything about their children.”

“I’d settle for anything really.”

“He’ll come around.” Manuel said as he walked into the kitchen with a stack of fresh dishes. “He’s still young, finding himself. One day he’ll be calling you every other day, just like Saanvi here. You’ve been an amazing mother, built an amazing life for him, he’ll always remember that.” 

He pressed a kiss to Soraya’s cheek, and she gave him a grateful smile before he left the two women to their work. Once he was out of earshot, Saanvi whispered. 

“It is a good life, isn't it?”

“Yes…”

“Do you ever…think about those old dreams?”

Soraya shook her head. “I remember having them, but not…the dreams themselves.”

Flashes, imagined lives as a white man in a business office. An odd fixation to have, especially at the same time as Saanvi. On some level, Soraya recognised that it was real, but she rarely thought about it. This life, this culture and place had been her home for decades now. She didn’t even remember the name she used to imagine. 

They finished the dishes, and Saanvi poured them another glass of wine. Manuel was asleep in his chair, snoring away, and Soraya chuckled. 

“Sweet, old fool.”

“He still makes you happy, Mom?”

“Treats me like a treasure. I wish you could have somebody like that.” Soraya sighed as she sat down. “At least one of you seems to be heading that way.”

“Settling down just isn’t my style.” Saanvi grinned and raised her glass. “To life.”

Soraya mimicked the motion. “To life.”

~

Arjun settled back into his seat, driving down the familiar streets with ease as he headed back to his apartment. Katie was tense, and he laughed.

“You did great, Katie. They loved you.”

“You really think so? Why didn’t you tell your parents we’re living together, then? Are you afraid they won't approve?”

“I…didn’t think of it.”

“You didn’t think your mother would want to know that we’re living together.”

“Of course she would, I just…didn’t think to tell her.”

Katie sighed. “Arjun, I know you love being the strong, silent type, but I think it’s a bit much sometimes.”

He knew Katie was right; Arjun had never been the best at talking, especially not about himself. He hated those icebreaker games they were forced through at the beginning of every school year. He hated people knowing things about him, even giving his favourite show felt oddly invasive. When they played two truths and a lie, he always told three lies. 

He remembered when he was young, explaining to his mother that he was worried he’d give the wrong answer. That if he told people about himself, they’d judge him, say liking pink was a girl's colour, or that chick flicks weren’t supposed to be his favourites. His mother had just held him close and told him to be himself, no matter what people thought. Those were nice words, but a lot harder to practice than preach. 

Over time, he got so used to playing things close to the vest that it became second nature. Nobody had ever broken through his walls until Katie. On their second date, they went shopping, and Katie had been shocked at how much he knew about women’s clothing and by the fact that he didn’t mind holding her bags. When he’d bashfully explained growing up with his mom and sister and how he’d learned to enjoy the experience, she hadn’t judged him for it. She’d been delighted. Said it was terrific that he was open to a more feminine side. After that, telling her things about himself had come easily. He’d even mentioned that strange absence in his chest; the feeling that he was missing something important in his life and couldn’t figure out what. 

“I’ll tell mom about us next time.” He promised.

“Hopefully that’s soon.” She smiled, “I don't want to wait months to see them again. Your family is lovely, Arjun.”

“Yeah,” He smiled softly, “They are. They can be a lot sometimes, but I wouldn’t change anything about them.”