TOMORROW: New Patron Appreciation Day! (Patreon)

Oh, hi there! Welcome to The Valleyfolk's beloved Patreon page! 

You're probably not new here, but if you are, we just want to say hello and thanks for being here! As a token of our mildly creepy appreciation, tomorrow, June 28, will henceforth be known as New Patron Appreciation Day. It's not a national holiday yet, so keep that in mind when you're making your decisions for the 2020 presidential race. 

Throughout the day tomorrow, you'll be treated with a buffet of digital treats, and you'll have access to all of them regardless of whatever tier you're a part of. Fun! 

Breakfast starts with the letter "b," so tomorrow morning, pour yourself a glass of OJ and have yourself some bloopers, Game of Thrones-style. . . 

Then, go about your day. We're not gonna let you sit around with all those carbs in your body. Just come back here for lunch, which will be ten minutes of never-before-seen couch footage. It's a bunch of bonus segments that we cut for time from the original thirty-minute extravaganza. Portions are important. You should be stuffed by now. Feeling sleepy? 

Why don't you take a nap over there? Maybe curl up on the couch and turn on your favorite Disney movie. You're gonna wanna prepare for dinner, which will be over six minutes of EVEN MORE MOVIE MOVIE GAME WITH JACKSFILMS. You thought we ran out of footage? We didn't. I don't know how. Apparently we filmed nighty-eight hours of this video, but our influencer exploitation is your thoughtless gluttony! 

That's the face of a real movie-lover. You can tell by how passionate and knowledgeable he is. I should shave. Anyway, after you've enjoyed your three meals, it's time to relax at a day well done. Next up is drugs-- I mean dessert! Settle into your love chair, alone, in the dead of night, and enjoy this UNCANNY VALLEY EPISODE with Joe and Scuzz watching a girl slam her face into a bowl! Uncanny Valley is our half-Folk, half-puppet Reaction series where we go through viral, weird videos, or open the old SourceFed vaults and reminisce! It's more enjoyable and light-hearted than it sounds, usually. 

SEE YOU TOMORROW!