Eric Linnaeus | Book 3 | Chapter 1 - They Left Me at Dunkel! (Patreon)

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𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕃𝕖𝕗𝕥 𝕄𝕖 𝕒𝕥 𝔻𝕦𝕟𝕜𝕖𝕝!ᴄʟᴀɪʀᴇ ᴡᴀʟsʜ: ᴀᴘʀɪʟ, 𝟷𝟿𝟿𝟿.

─── .✦········· ───

So, as it turns out, I’m not very good at waiting. Achaicus and Molly showed up at the Mansion, and Eric left a day later. He went directly to save Nathaniel, or whatever, while the rest of us traveled to Dunkel. They spent the following day preparing, and I milled around uselessly. Of course I wanted to go with them, but Markos wouldn’t let me.

“It’s too dangerous for you. The Fae at Leúchtend are different from those here. You won’t be safe,” he explained in a very unsatisfactory manner.

“I’m a big girl; I can take care of myself,” I insisted, latching onto his waist to be difficult as he tried to get dressed.

“This isn’t a debate,” Markos stated firmly, brushing me off. He adjusted his shirt and grabbed his weapons as I continued after him, pleading.

“I’ll stay out of the way, I promise!”

“I said no, Claire. It’s not a leisurely day trip; this is a fight, and people are going to die. You’re not allowed to come.”

“You think I can’t look after myself?”

“I know you can’t.”

That stung, “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“You’re too weak and not trained; at best, you would be a hindrance. At worst, you would die. I won’t allow it.”

Who was he to tell me what I was or wasn’t allowed to do? “I didn’t think you were so pigheaded! I want to come!”

“And I said no! I don’t want to see you torn into little human pieces and sprinkled across Leúchtend. You are not coming, and that’s final.” He had never raised his voice to me before. In fact, that was probably our first argument, and he didn’t give in. No matter how much I begged him.

“Fine,” I muttered spitefully, his attitude kind of pissed me off.

When it was time for them to leave, Markos gently kissed my cheek in farewell, and in return, I gave him the silent treatment—folding my arms and glaring after him as he went. I wanted him to feel how mad I was that he was leaving me behind. It was childish of me, and as soon as that cherry-red Mustang of his disappeared from view, I knew I had made a mistake.

I shouldn’t have let him leave like that. I should have told him how much he meant to me and asked him to stay safe instead of being an idiot. It dawned on me that there was a possibility that he wouldn’t return, and a deep regret replaced my anger. What if I never saw him again and the last words I spoke to him were angry ones?

The anxieties I felt then were an odd mixture of mundane and magical. See, when you’re dating a monster, you still get the generalized worries like: He could crash his car and die! But then you also get the ones like: He could get killed horribly in combat! And there is no middle ground between the two.

After a while Ávila moved to go back inside, but I stayed where I was, cursing my own stupidity about everything. I stood out in the cold alone until the sun began to fall, before reluctantly turning to go. Without Markos around, nobody really spoke to me. Hell, I was lucky if anyone even so much as looked in my direction. It was lonely…

I found one of Markos’s coats in his room. It hadn’t been washed yet, so it still smelt like him, and I curled up into it gratefully as I lay on the bed. The novelty of staying in a castle was starting to wear off.

If I wasn’t wearing Fae clothing, I didn’t look like I belonged. I stood out like a sore thumb in my human clothes, and honestly, even if I was wearing one of the dresses Markos had made for me, I was still the only person with dark hair. No one wanted to talk to me or be my friend, and I had a hard time accepting that.

I tried befriending Ávila, since she’s one of the few who will even talk to me, and she’s nice. But I could tell she was just being polite. She’s kind of old and motherly for a fae. If I had to put it in human terms, I would have said she was around fifty? When I asked, she said she was five hundred and sixty-eight, which completely blew my mind.

Another interesting thing about her is her teeth. They’re like Markos’s, long and pointed. All Fae men have noticeable canine teeth, but Markos, Nathaniel, and Achaicus have the longest. I had assumed they were the only ones who had canines that big, until I saw hers.

Absently, I wondered if my baby would have teeth like that, and my hand automatically moved to my stomach. I wasn’t far along; there wasn’t even a bump yet, and I hadn’t told Markos. Honestly, I didn’t know what to do.

The orders Nathaniel placed on me meant I couldn’t tell anyone about my baby before I told Eric. He had been sitting on the floor in the kitchen when I at last got the chance to talk to him, and I hesitated because he looked upset. Charles was beside him, and when I first tried to speak I found I couldn’t because my brother was still in the room.

I had no idea Fae commands could be so restrictive like that, and I wasn’t able to say anything about it until Charles was out of hearing range. But when I finally told Eric he didn’t react at all. I hoped he might be excited for me; instead, he was quiet. Taking a long moment to think, he let out a slow breath as if he had come to some kind of conclusion before responding.

“I’m assuming you’re telling me because it’s a Fae child?” he asked calmly without emotion.

“Yeah, and Nathaniel told me in a scary voice that I had to speak to you before telling anyone else, so… I didn’t really have a choice.”

“And Markos is the father?”

“Yeah!” I was happy, and if he wasn’t so passionless about it, I would have been brimming with excitement. But his mellow demeanor sucked all the fun out of it.

“That’s fine. You’re not far along. I can get rid of it,” Eric assured as he stood, and my joy evaporated.

“What? No!” I sputtered, causing him to pause when I grabbed his arm, “…I don’t want to get rid of it…”

“You don’t have a choice.”

“What do you mean? Of course I do; it’s my baby.”

I could have sworn he almost looked annoyed. But when he spoke, it was just as calm as ever, “You’ll die if you don’t terminate it.”

“…What aren’t you telling me?”

“The only thing you need to comprehend is that it’s a monster, and you need to get rid of it.”

“It’s not a monster. It’s my child, Eric,” I told him curtly.

“Your ‘child’ will tear through your body and start eating you from the inside,” he stated bluntly, and that gave me pause.

“That… can’t be true, can it?”

“It’s a Fae child. You can’t support its dietary requirements.”

Until then, I hadn’t considered that Markos’s child would be any different from any other child. But it made sense that a fae baby would be different, and the first notion that crossed my mind was that I was going to have to eat human meat. Cannibal Claire, I thought to myself. The idea made me sick; while at the same time, I couldn’t bear the thought of getting rid of it again. I hated doing it the first time.

I had always wanted to be a mother, so it wasn’t an easy choice for me to make, and I don’t like to talk about it. But there was no way I was going to have my uncle’s child… I cried the entire procedure and then some more for days after. No one told me how scary it would be, and the nurses whispered about how young I was when they thought I couldn’t hear them.

“I-isn’t there something I can do?” I insisted.

“No. Fae are predatory, and we are prey. When it starts to starve, it will do what every other living thing does: try to survive. It will eat you alive from the inside out. Hollow you out slowly over time; it will be an agonizing death for you both,” Eric snapped.

That was terrifying to hear, “What if, what if I eat human meat? That would keep him happy, right?”

“You would have to eat only human meat.”

“I-I can do that…”

“No, you can’t. And even if you could, it doesn’t matter. You’re not compatible with it. You’ll die long before it ever reaches adulthood, and that’s assuming it doesn’t miscarry or kill you first.”

My heart raced, was that really how it would be? I didn’t want to believe it; my baby would be half-human, so maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as he was saying? “What will the baby be like… a-after…?” I asked quietly, and Eric grew frustrated.

“Listen to me. It’ll be a monster. It won’t love you; it won’t be capable of it. If you keep this thing, your life is over. Think about Charles; I’m sure he wouldn’t want to lose you over this…”

“..Are there any more downsides?” I murmured; I had to be sure.

“Plenty. Human fetus’s kick. Fae kick and discharge magic. There’s nothing that can be done to stop it, and fae children bite frequently. They also learn how to use glamours and commands at a young age. Which means you will have no control over it. If it doesn’t want to go to bed, it won’t, and it might very well bite your fingers off. When they throw tantrums, it’s not only annoying but dangerous as well.”

“What will he look like?” I don’t know why I wanted that information so badly.

“Are you listening to anything I’m saying? Your life is forfeit if you have this child.”

“I just want to know… Will it look like Markos?”

Eric snorted, “Is that why you’re considering this? Because of Markos? You realize he won’t want it, or you, if he knew. He doesn’t want children. He will probably kill you just to get rid of it.”

“…He wouldn’t do that…”

“Yes, he would. I’ve tried to warn you before, but you ignored me every time, so I’ll say it plainly for you now. Markos doesn’t care about you. And he won’t want this child. If you decide to keep it, it will kill you. If, by some miracle, it doesn’t, your life is over anyway.”

“Markos wouldn’t hurt me…”

“Even if you believe that, why do you think he doesn’t already have children?” I didn’t have an answer for him, so he continued, “It’s because he doesn’t want them. If you tell him, he’ll use his magic to induce a miscarriage. You won’t have his support or anyone else’s. You need to get rid of this child.”

I couldn’t think what to say. The back of my throat burned, and tears were beginning to well in my eyes. Was everything he was saying true? Was it pointless for me to bring this child to term? Would he suffer? Would Markos kill him, and me?

As I started to cry, Eric only looked more annoyed; then his demeanor changed, and his expression softened. “It’s okay… It’s not your fault this happened. I should have warned you before. I’m sorry,” he assured sympathetically as he gently placed a hand on my cheek.

It was odd to see him show an emotion, and I realized he must have been making an effort just for me. That was sweet of him, and I found it strangely comforting. Without thinking, I wrapped my arms around him. I cried into his shoulder, and he patted my hair.

“Please get rid of it… I can do it right now. It won’t hurt…” Eric whispered softly in my ear, and I shivered.

His voice was velvety and smooth, and I had never noticed before how nice he was to hold. His body was firm; I could feel his muscles through his top, and he smelt heavenly, like sandalwood. When I pulled back to look at him, his good eye was startlingly blue, mesmerizing like a sapphire sparkling in sunlight.

“Please, Claire…” he murmured, and I felt strange.

I had heard what he was saying, but I was distracted in a way I couldn’t quite comprehend. It was as if part of me would have done anything he asked; while another part was loud, like an alarm ringing in my head, alerting me to some peril I couldn’t see. Why did I feel like that?

The spell was broken when his fingertips touched my stomach, and I recoiled sharply. That felt like danger, and pure panic coursed through me as I broke into a sweat. I can’t explain why, but I felt like if he had placed his whole hand over my stomach, my baby would have died.

“Claire,” he warned, and his tone was immediately colder.

“N-no, I haven’t decided yet,” the words felt weak. There was a bitter taste in my mouth, and I was afraid, terrified, of him for no reason I could place.

“You cannot keep that child; it will kill you.”

“I just want to think about it some more…”

“Listen to me. Nothing good comes from keeping it.”

I didn’t answer as I backed away from him before turning to run upstairs. I saw Charles through a stream of tears and didn’t stop. Maybe I was overreacting… I’m sure Eric meant well. He just didn’t know Markos like I did, yet I couldn’t help but feel like he would have killed my baby if I had given him half the chance.

─── .✦········· ───

I still haven’t told Markos yet. So, maybe I’m not as sure as I should be. I thought about trying some human meat at dinner the night they left to save Nathaniel. I even put it on my plate as Ávila watched, amused. It seemed Eric was right, and I couldn’t bring myself to eat it. I dry-retched just looking at it and couldn’t touch anything else on the plate either.

I had to swap out my plate with Zhanna. She was one of the other few fae who would talk to me. She was about my age, looks wise anyway, and her father was a fae named Alvíss. Although, he didn’t look very happy when one of his daughters spoke to me. I didn’t know much about her mother yet, but apparently all three girls had different mothers.

After a moment I made eye contact with Ávila, and it looked like she was about to ask me something when guards came through the doors, “Lady Ávila, there are ghouls at the gates, waiting for you.”

“Ghouls?” she asked curiously, “Whatever could they want at this hour?”

She stood without saying anything more, and I was quick to follow her. I had no idea what ghouls were or what it meant that they were here, but I wasn’t about to be left behind. I was hoping it might have something to do with Markos. The longer he was gone, the more deeply I regretted not saying goodbye.

At the gates a small crowd had gathered, and nervous murmurs indicated a certain level of unrest. There was a tension in the air that made the hair on my arms stand up, and I recognized it to be magic despite being unable to see it. At the center of the crowd stood a small group of people.

They weren’t as tall as most of the Fae around them, and they stood out starkly as all had black hair, red eyes, and doubled canine teeth. Among them was an older man with salt and pepper hair, a middle-aged woman, a younger man, and a woman who seemed to be about my age.

As I arrived with Ávila their focus moved to me, and I was like a deer in headlights. Maybe I looked just as weird to them as they did to me? A little human girl amongst the Fae, wearing jeans and a knitted top under an oversized fae coat? Yeah, I could see why they were staring.

“Tougo, a pleasant surprise. What brings you here?” Ávila asked politely. She, unlike the others around who murmured amongst themselves, was unfazed by their appearance.

“We received a call from a man named Eric Linnaeus. I believe you might be familiar with him?” the older female ghoul spoke up.

“Ahh, Nathaniel’s Pet; what did he tell you?”

“He said you are in the middle of a territorial dispute. Ordinarily, we wouldn’t get involved, as it’s your responsibility to protect the boundaries.”

Ávila smiled tightly, “Of course,” she agreed humbly. I got the impression they were subtly suggesting the Fae weren’t doing their jobs.

“However, we have decided that it is in our best interest to ensure that Dunkel is victorious in such circumstances. As such, we are here to help.”

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