The Daily Grind - Chapter 384 (Patreon)

The second of this week's chapters. This time I even put the right number the first time!

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"I am, somehow, less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein’s brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops."  -Stephen Jay Gould, The Panda's Thumb: More Reflections in Natural History-

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There was something incredibly satisfying to James about having a dungeon based problem, that he already had a dungeon based solution to.

Sometimes it came in a broad form.  Dungeon combat was often incredibly dangerous, and the Order’s ownership of shield bracers, survival enhancing purple orbs, the Climb spell that made you invincible, and most recently Kiki’s charms, took that normally risky endeavor and made it… not safe, but manageable.   A calculated risk.  But it wasn’t a specific fix either, it was just that there were a lot of things that generally wanted to kill them and they had a lot of ways to not die.

Sometimes, it came in an almost hilariously targeted fashion.  James still remembered the sludge mass in the Underburbs trying to give him cancer of all things, only to run into a purple orb that he’d really never expected to need himself.  Though he also kind of knew that was hubris waiting to happen.

And sometimes, like now, it was more just that the Order had a suite of tools that they probably used and shared and had more expertise with than was expected by anyone that was designing security systems.  Whether those security systems were human or dungeon-made in nature, it didn’t really matter.

Right now, it was a dungeon he was busy circumventing.  Specifically, the one that Vex and her partners had explored before meeting the Order.  And explored… extensively… James realized as he reviewed the somewhat scattered .mem file Vex had given him.

The thing about their dungeon’s security was, as every navigator in the Order that got near it would claim, it was something of a work of art.  You could just walk straight into the dungeon at any time.  But no one ever would, unless they were acting intentionally abnormally, and that made it even harder to get back into the dungeon once you knew it was there.  People wouldn’t notice that they were skirting around the archway that opened to another world.  And no one would be able to properly know or track that it was happening if they were watching either.  It was like knowledge itself just slid off of the world like rain on a windshield when it came to the dungeon.

You couldn’t share it.  You could barely share it with yourself, though there were apparently a lot of tricks people could use to make their way back in, like how domain senses flat out ignored the veil around the place.  But you couldn’t talk about the dungeon, make art about the dungeon, you could barely explain the magic you’d gotten from the dungeon while doing it.  The only place safe was in your own head.  Your memories and thoughts, it would never change, it would just… snip off expression.

So it was kind of neat that skulljacks let them just dodge the whole thing.  Assignments, too, and navigators to a lesser extent.  But Vex, though she was still new to using her cybernetic, had taken the knowledge that she could give their dungeon the middle finger and ran with it, getting back to James with this .mem that was imperfect, but contained a lot of useful information.

They called their dungeon the Orphan Recesses.

It was a good name, in James’ opinion, but because of how disjointed Vex’s prepared memories were, it only took a brief moment before he understood it wasn’t just for dramatic effect.

The dungeon had a population.

A human population.

In amongst the endless playgrounds, the blacktop that would sometimes warm in waves under the eternal silver-purple twilight, and the occasional inspiration that brought with it an addendum to a person’s domain, there were children.  Vex and her polycule had seen them, multiple times, but only ever from a distance.  In truth, they couldn’t actually confirm they were human.  Not really.  But Vex had taken pictures of them, over two years of delving, and had matched faces to supposed missing persons.

Why the kids never approached them, they didn’t know.  And after the third attempt to get close to them had ended with the only actual traps that any of the team had encountered in the Playground, they stopped trying to approach back.

Before James had been able to wonder how there were people surviving that long in a dungeon, he’d gotten an answer from those same scattershot memories.  The food in there was not only safe to eat, it was very effective food.  Not only in terms of nutrition, but also acting as a temporary boost to a different aspects of a domain.  And it was very likely each kid that was in there had a domain that was probably growing steadily more useful, if they actually had what it used available.

But not only were the food and water safe, the whole place was safe.  There were no monsters.  No traps.  No weather events worse than tightly focused circles of spring rain in some places.  The dungeon was the kind of place that, if you went deep enough, you would find almost everything you needed for survival, with relative ease.

Oh, there was always the chance you hurt yourself, of course.  James saw memories of places farther in where the geometry warped so far that it would qualify as biome shifts.  Places where the wood and plastic castles spanned great chasms, places where the jungle gyms rose up to skyscraper height with nothing but shaky wood platforms between a delver and a fall, places where water fountains and sprinkler systems turned the dungeon into a marshy wetland that grew weeds like dandelions and cattails in huge patches taller than a human.  All of those places, there were chances for a mistake that could prove fatal.  But…

It wasn’t really worse than a kid on a playground.  You could put yourself in stupid situations, and James was sure if there were especially young kids in there that some of them definitely had.  But as long as you didn’t, the dungeon wouldn’t hurt you.

He wondered, with everything he knew about dungeons so far, what that meant.  How did this one derive any kind of food-income from the way it did things, if it was like this?  Or did it simply not, and that was why its reward was so spread out, thin magic that required a long time before it tipped over to something usable?

But then again, Clutter was basically the same way.  A dungeon that wrapped people in a warm embrace instead of a blanket of thorns.  What made them different?

He wanted access to the notes.  The secret document that told him all the answers.  James was doubly annoyed that he didn’t have that file, because he was pretty sure it actually existed.  Members of the Pact of Pillars had made repeated references in the Order’s conversations with their number to the fact that ‘dungeons’ were actually some kind of intentional containment measure.  So if anyone was going to know, it was them, but even finding them was a pain and getting a straight answer was right out of the question.

“Maybe,” James said slowly to his partners that he was hanging out with at home, pretending to have a quiet day for about an hour or two, “we should rob another pillar.”

”James, you are dear to me in a way I often have trouble expressing.”  Anesh said, not lowering the hand of cards he had in front of his face.  “But.”

Alanna, looking half asleep, swung her head around to stare at Anesh.  “You can just throw things at him, you don’t need the preface.”

”No, he needs to know I love him before I throw things at him.”  Anesh shook his head with mock seriousness.  “It’s been a part of our process since before I even knew I loved him.”

One of James’ hands went up, fingers splayed out, elbow propped up on their living room table.  “I am… right here?”

”Hush.”  Alanna reached over that table to try to grab his face, and James just sat still and let her, because he knew for a fact she had no backup plan for what to do if she actually succeeded.  After James showed no reaction to her assault on his face, Alanna dropped her hand back down to the couch, and sighed.  “Okay, what were you saying?”  She asked Anesh.

”That we should maybe stop robbing people that can kill us without thinking about it.”  He said in a subdued voice that wasn’t quite playing along with his partners.  “That… that maybe we don’t need to take the same risks as before when it comes to the pillars, who are, in case you’ve both forgotten?  Utterly and completely mad.”

James grimaced.  “Okay, I’m not gonna just say yes, because it might be a lie.  But I understand at least.”  He told Anesh, before smiling.  “Also I remember you doing that thing a lot.  You did it the first time I told you about the dungeon!”  He didn’t say which dungeon.  He didn’t need to, this time.  “I seem to recall you calling me the ‘hypothetical godfather for your future children’.”

”Well that wouldn’t make much sense anymore, would it?”  Anesh asked, taking what reassurance he could from James as he sat the cards he was holding down fully, knowing that he and Alanna were going to abandon their game entirely anyway.

When James noticed that Alanna looked away with a guilty expression, not saying anything at all, he felt a residual discomfort in his own chest.  “In… what sense?”  He asked Anesh.  “Because…”

”Oh piss.”  Anesh reached over to Alanna as he realized he’d spoken a little carelessly.  “I meant that James would be upgraded from godfather to something… likely undefined and pointlessly complicated.  Not…”

”Not that our extended polycule is somehow entirely incapable of reproducing?”  Alanna asked with a sardonic smile.  “Oh wait, no, Sarah!  But that doesn’t count.”  She grabbed at Anesh’s hand over their living room table and squeezed, reassuring both of them at once that things would be fine.

”If TQ and I actually are dating - and that kind of is an if right now - then Cheha exists in our polycule’s web.”  James offered.

Anesh and Alanna turned to him with an artillery battery worth of flat stares.  “James.”  Anesh said.  “That is a horrible suggestion.”  Alanna nodded along as the two of them both leaned back, separating with a lingering touch of their fingers.

”Also we don’t even know TQ can’t get pregnant!  Camracondas use gender as decoration!  James I have a fact finding mission for you.  But… uh.  Did you want to be a dad some day?”  Alanna asked Anesh directly, with a little conversational whiplash.  “I know James’ weird smoothie of feelings on it, but what about you?  We’ve gotten in more struggles to survive together than conversations about the future, huh?”

With a peaceful smile, Anesh leaned back, letting the warmth of the apartment’s fireplace wrap around him as he thought over his answer.  “I think… I think I’m okay if it never happens.”  He said.  “It‘s been something I’ve always assumed was a part of life, but it isn’t, is it?  Or it doesn’t have to be.  Maybe I’m thinking that because I’ve been learning first hand that I’m a little less heterosexual than predicted-“

”Cute.”  James offered.

”Yes thank you.”  Anesh’s blush flourished around his nose and cheeks.  “But I wouldn’t hate having kids, even now.  I just don’t want to go hunting for it.”

”Adoption is still an option.”  Alanna said, before squinting and mouthing the similar words to herself, until she shook her head and got back to the point.  “We keep finding dungeon life that’re… I mean, they are kids.  The stuff animals especially?  But also ratroaches, camracondas… chanters?  Oh, crocamaws?  I guess we’re doing crocamaws now?”

James chuckled.  “That reminds me, I haven’t heard from Alex and Simon in twelve hours, and the last thing we did hear was them saying it’s a mess we’re working on it.  Maybe I should go check on them.”

Tapping on the table, Anesh pointed at James.  “Now see, this is why adoption isn’t going to work.”  He said.

”Me?”

”You.”  Anesh nodded.  “And Alanna, and… and Arrush too.  Sarah.  Me.  All of us have a deeply unhealthy work life balance.  And Alanna you already put in time with your sisters, too.  Having a kid in this apartment?  We’d… we’re good at solving problems.  I don’t think any of us are good at solving schedules.”

”Touche.”  James sighed.  “But imagine if we did settle down and just got to have a family life…” he trailed off, staring up at the ceiling of the apartment wistfully.

He’d always had a rather hostile relationship with responsibility.  But that was mostly because James had always been ordered to take it up, instead of approaching responsibility on his own terms.  What would it be like, he fantasized, to be a parent?  To raise and protect and care for maybe a few different younger kids that needed a family?

There was a deeply tempting fantasy there.  He spent so much of his time ending worlds, maybe he could build one for that hypothetical family.  He had a mental image of making dinner for everyone, Arrush and Alanna listening to happy or dramatic recountings of days at school or small adventures, Sarah and Keeka telling bedtime stories, Zhu being the drop of chaos that led kids into strange situations and new experiences, TQ and James himself imparting different flavors of the same worldview as best they could…

”You okay over there?”  Anesh asked.

”I… dunno.”  James said, still smiling.  “Just thinking about a future I don’t think we get.”  He said.  “At least not yet.  Too much left to do.”

”Yeah.”  Alanna said in a strange tone, staring at him with sad eyes, before shaking that off too.  “Anyway, breaking away from sad hour, what memory are you eating over there?”  She asked.

James perked up, looking down at the USB stick he’d taken out of his skulljack braid and left on the table when he’d interrupted Alanna and Anesh’s game.  “Oh!  Thing from Vex about her dungeon.  Orphaned Recesses.  Great name, A+ foreshadowing.”

”Oh I hate that already!”  Alanna laughed.

Clearing his throat, Anesh shifted back in his own chair and assumed a relaxed pose like he’d metaphysically melded with the comfortable apartment itself.  “Is it full of orphans?” He asked as a joke.

”Yes!”  James said.

“Well fuck me, I’m never asking questions again.”  Anesh groaned.

“It’s also strange that I can talk about this with you guys.”  James realized.  “Zhu’s fault, maybe?  No, Zhu’s not here today.” He frowned as he mentally poked at the navigator and found those separate thoughts largely empty.  “Maybe because we delved together?  But Anesh didn’t…”

”The universe could be taking pity on us!”  Alanna lied.

James shook his head.  “Why would it start now?”  He joked.  “Well whatever.  So.  The domains.  I want to talk about the domains.”

”Go for it buddy, don’t let us stop you.  Though I am gonna ask for the .mem before we go in again.”  Alanna made a grabby motion and James expertly flicked the USB into her palm.

James nodded as he stood and stretched, his partners both watching him with dumb grins as he arched his arms over his head, noticed he was being observed, and tried to glower at them.  “Dorks.”  He said.  “Anyway, so.  Vex’s memories are a hodgepodge with a lot of unclear supposition in them, but I think that there’s a common theme in the dungeon.  My suspicion is that every general region has one of those points of power, and also that they’re visible from an elevated position nearby.”

”Oh, you think the challenge isn’t in randomly stumbling on them, but the climb?”

”I suspect!”  James said happily as Alanna caught on instantly.  “Currently, being able to sense paper in a tiny patch of space a foot away from myself isn’t super useful, but I can clearly see where there’s a potential tipping point in the future if we do dedicate a lot of time there.  Do we have that time?  I dunno!  The world is falling the fuck apart!”

”I would still like to know what is going on with my nominal home.”  Anesh said with a grimace, looking away and out the sliding glass door to their back porch.

”JP’s on it.”  James reassured him.  And then, going for actual reassurance, added, “But no, really, JP’s on it, and… it doesn’t look like things are on fire, you know?  We’ve also identified everyone’s families by now, and I know you get updates on that, right?”  Anesh nodded, still looking away.  “Your parents are safe.  It’ll be okay.”

“I know.  I… we’ll talk later.  Domains, please.”  Anesh welcomed the distraction.

James caught the stress in his boyfriend’s voice and cleared his throat, taking only a second to oblige.  “Yeah.  So we still don’t know what Alanna got…”

”I’m useless!”  She lied with a boisterous enthusiasm.

”But I still want us to get a little more to do with the things, because I want to see how they interlink with other magic.  Like the Breath thing?  Huge.”

Alanna nodded as she flicked her hand up.  “I really like being less cold.  The orb means I can survive it, but I don’t have to like it!

”Yeah, so, does it do that with Velocity?  Or even better, some of the Bank dungeon mana we haven’t gotten to play with yet?  God there’s so much we don’t know.”  James was so fucking excited to see how all the magic worked together.  “I’m actually kind of shocked it doesn’t do anything with our demiplanes.  Or maybe it does?”  He was pacing now, grinning widely.  “I think what excites me most about it, with everything that Vex just passed on to me, is the fact that the dungeon is safe.  That we can just… funnel a few hundred people through there a week?  More?  That we can make domain magic a population magic!  How cool is that?”

”You know, some day,” Alanna snapped her fingers into pointing at James, “you’re gonna get some kind of actual high impact superpower, and you’re gonna whine that it only applies to you.”

”Correct.”  James nodded, watching his girlfriend roll her eyes at him.  “But I’m mostly interested in the scope of what domains affect though.  Broad categories, right?  Which means that they have broad potential applications, which means that getting your domain isn’t going to lock you out of anything.  Not really.  I constantly worry about having to nudge our society into place on optimizing for job satisfaction and not job utility, you know?”

”I don’t think you’d ever stop worrying about that.”  Anesh told him.  “Though I am with you, don’t get me wrong.  I can’t think of anything worse than having some kind of wizard lottery to see what job a person got to work for their whole life.”

Alanna sucked in a breath through her teeth as she got up and maneuvered around James to get to their kitchen and get something to drink.  “Or worse!”  She added.  “If we sorted jobs by what species was best at them!”

”Christ, I will fucking shoot the first person who suggests that.”  James said flatly.  “Maybe not lethally.  But I’ll fucking do it, just watch.”

”You could try explaining the issue first?”  Anesh suggested a more moderate path forward.

”That never works.  I need to assert dominance.”  James said with a disappointed shake of his head.  “Over… uh… civic education, I guess.”  He faltered just a little.  “Anyway.  Anesh, want to see what your domain is?  I bet you get math.”

His boyfriend’s embarrassed groan was a little satisfying, but Anesh followed it up with a little tsk noise before saying, “I don’t think I’ve done actual high level math for months.  And that’s my fault too!  I should be working on the statistical distribution of orbs or something like that, because randomness is never really random, and how it isn’t random would give us rather relevant information on where we should focus delving efforts these days.  Though maybe there’s less of a rush if we know we aren’t quite so on our own against the end times.”

”Well let’s not go that far.”  Alanna held up a hand.  “The Coalition can have all the credit for saving the world if they want, but shit would it have been so much easier to save lives a bunch of times last year if the fucking army was around.”

”I am also annoyed about that.”  James agreed.  “But that doesn’t change that I want Anesh to have a math domain.”

”Right, shit, sorry.  Carry on.”  Alanna gave him a small bow.

James bowed back theatrically, then faced Anesh again, who looked up at him with expectant eyes.  He took a moment to let himself just… look at his partner.  The swell of affection in his chest echoing through Alanna, who he heard say something teasing behind him.  Then James shook his head and looked away.  “No that was kind of it.”  He said with obvious embarrassment.  “I want to get you a domain.  Oh!  We should make bets on what it’ll be though!  I bet that could be a fun Order ritual.”

”I refuse to wager on-“

”Math!”  Alanna cut in.

”I already called math.”  James folded his arms at her.

Anesh neatly concussed James with a thrown pillow.  “I will not be taking this seriously.”  He declared.  “But I wouldn’t say no to making a day out of going on a long hike together. Which is what the dungeon is, no?”

“Essentially.”  James shrugged.  “I do want to know why it’s eating children, but since it’s not hurting anyone… I mostly just want to make sure they’re okay, you know?”  He sighed.  “We can’t do anything about the Coalition right now, we’re still trying to learn about what’s going on with the Tyrannies, we don’t even fucking know why the US is torching the whole economy by grounding passanger flights, and things just feel bad right now…”

”…and…?” Anesh asked, waiting for the second half of James’ list of Worst Fears.

”…and I love you two.”  He said with a shrug.  “And we should focus on what we can do.  Which is get Anesh a domain, figure out what Alanna’s even is, power them all up, and track down some lost kids.”

Alanna thunked the mason jar she was drinking out of into their sink.  “We can do a bit more than that!”  She threatened.

”Sure, but I figured scheduling a whole week of delves is optimistic at best.”  James laughed.  “And I’ve got other stuff to do, and I don’t even know what the hell is going on with all the new dungeons we’re learning about.  Plus, I don’t want to be out of touch if Alex and Simon do need me to swoop in and join them.  But I wanna do some delves, yeah.  Fuck, I really want to do another massive Library expedition, that one was so good last time.  We just need…”

”A month where nothing happens?”  Anesh suggested.

”Hush.”  James told his boyfriend.  “If you say it too loud you’ll spook it and we’ll never find it!”

”Months aren’t deer, James.”  Anesh laughed.  “I’d know.”

James eyed his boyfriend suspiciously.  “Because you have a skill rank in calendars or because you have a species rank in deer?”

”Both, surprisingly.”

”That’s not surprising.”  James laughed.  “Anyway.  Who wants to come with me and help me get to the point that I can fire paper airplanes like railgun slugs, the same way Vex can with oil?”

Alanna coughed suddenly. ”Vex can what?”

”Oh yeah!  She’s way more dangerous than she looks!  She just doesn’t know how to be violent, really.  You remember their dungeon; there’s nothing there to fight.  Vex is… like… goth club intimidating.  Not battlefield intimidating.”

While trying to make a mental catalogue of how many times she’d said something sarcastic to Vex, Alanna turned her attention to the ladder that led up into the apartment’s ‘attic’.  “I’m in.”  She said.  “But first, I need to help our dog out of a dungeon.”

”Yeah I hear footsteps.”  James also looked up.  “Anyway, how about tomorrow?  Anesh?”

”All of me would be delighted.”  Anesh said.  “But aren’t we supposed to be relaxing today?”

James smiled with a long, long sigh.  “I do not know why you would think I would be doing that.  I’ve sat still for over an hour already.”

”Ooooof course.”  Anesh stood up and let James wrap him in a hug while Alanna scooted behind their couch and looked up the ladder like she was preparing to catch a whole hundred pounds of falling dog in her arms if it came to that.  “Now if you’re interested in a little wager…” he told James with humor in his voice.  “What color do you think Auberdeen is going to be when she comes back down?”

”Whiiiiite?  Oh no.”  James let out his own sigh, remembering Clutter Ascent’s new hobby of making hot springs that changed hair, cable, or fur color.  “What would look silliest?  Blue?  Does she have one for blue?”

”I suspect we’re about to find out.”  Anesh said, as from up in the hole in reality that led to the current forerunner for friendliest dungeon, a call from Sarah rang out warning Auberdeen to be careful on the ladder.

The answer, which neither of them guessed, was a deep and almost shining crimson.  And Auberdeen herself managed to get down without needing to be caught, a feat that Sarah didn’t replicate herself, though that might have just been so Alanna would catch her and spin her around in the apartment’s living room.

James loved this strange life he’d ended up in.  And he took a moment to savor it before he ruined the moment by running off to poke his head in on all the other concerns that he was trying to keep from boiling over into big problems.

At least he had tomorrow to look forward to.

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Scrap collapsed in a heaving heap at the end of a mild obstacle course.

The camraconda waiting across the finish line clicked a timer with a neutral gaze.  “An improvement.  Do you know where you can improve next?”

”N-n-nnnn…” Scrap felt like he was going to throw up.  Or die.  Or both!

”Your tail.  The uneven bifurcation makes your weight distribution different during jumps.  But do not become too used to it; you are learning your body so you know what you want to rebuild.”  The camraconda said with an odd inflection in its digital voice.

”H-h-h…” The unmodified ratroach forced his body to take a breath, the deep inhalation coming with the sensation of broken glass in his lungs, even through the potion that fixed some of the worst of the pain.  But it let him talk at least.  “H-h-how d-d-d-do you know ab-ab-about my tails?”  He asked, snarling through his stammer.

The camraconda looking down at him gave a smile that didn’t fit on its face.  “Oh!  I am a ratroach.”  Ishah told him.

”N-n-n-nnnnnnnooooo.”  Scrap protested, a different kind of heaving coming from his exhausted form as he tried not to laugh while the exercise potion did its work.

Ishah nodded someone else’s head.  “Mercy insists I have a hobby.  So I have joined the body exploration club, on the condition that I not attempt parkour with anyone else’s body, which I think is unfair.”  He shook his cabled head in a hefty back and forth, overcommitting to the motion.  “It is… fun… to adapt to new forms.”

”W-why are y-y-y-y-you here th-th-th-then?”  Scrap asked as at the start of the obstacle course, the next aspirant started their own run.  This one human, and being gauged for actual improvement, not just understanding of how to move a body that was going to be fixed in the near future.

The camraconda laughed, which sounded incredibly strange, even to the relatively new ratroach who had only been here for months and not years.  “I was told I needed a hobby, I was not told I couldn’t do two things at once!”  Ishah flexed forward, offering the bulk of his current cabled body to Scrap so the ratroach could pick himself up.  “Now!  Rest for you.  And we should talk about reshaping your paws.  I can see where you put weight, and a lot of us don’t realize it’s easy to add a little chitin for support during surgery.  I will show you.”

”Th-th… thank you…” Scrap said, scurrying after the camraconda that wasn’t really a camraconda, wondering more than anything else in that moment if he could join the body experimentation club too.

_____

James blipped into Oklahoma to visit a bunch of old people and also his favorite scout team, and found that he wasn’t the first person to have that idea.

Surprisingly, it wasn’t Kiki.  He didn’t actually know where Kiki was at the moment, though James suspected that it was doting on her newest adopted grandkids in the form of Clutter Ascent’s stuff animals, or hiding in the cabin in the mountains that the Order had acquired for her.  Or both.  Maybe Kiki could duplicate herself for vacations, James didn’t know.  But either way, she’d earned more than a little downtime after being murdered in a Wal Mart parking lot.

Instead, after making his way into the old elementary school that James was pretty sure had never been cleaner or more well maintained than right this moment, he found one of his own knights hanging out in the old library.  Beyond just Charlie’s team, too.

The Northern Oklahoma Proud Grandparents Adventuring Society - James legitimately loved saying the whole thing at high speed just to see Alanna’s reaction every time - was a comfortable place to him.  And not just because they were friendly and had free jam he could take home, but because their whole little clubhouse felt like the Lair.  As soon as James walked into their main room, he was met with a scene of people relaxing together on a couch watching football, flipping through a photo album, making notes with highlighter on a travel brochure, playing with a cat that was currently outsmarting the person playing with it, reading, napping, puzzling through a magic item’s use, and feeding fish that definitely weren’t from outside a dungeon.

And how could he ever not fall in love with that?  As far as vibes went, it was perfect.  This was a place where people spent time.  It was, in its own way, culture.  This was something James wanted to recreate in a thousand different forms and formats and gift to everyone that lived under the Order’s umbrella.

He also wanted to know about the dungeontech they had here, but that wasn’t what he was actually what he was here for today.  But he still took some time before going over to harass Charlie and Alice to stop at the other Order member he recognized.

”Hey Vex.”  James said, stopping by the roughed up but still fancy table that Vex was sitting at holding a had of UNO cards, glaring at an old man across from her who seemed like he was having a great time.  On his shoulder, a partly distracted Zhu waved at them as well.  “Hey Archie.  How’s Eileen doing?”

”Jimbo!  Fluffy!”  The old man cheerfully greeted him, tossing a card onto the pile between himself and the delver.  “She’s having a great time now that we’ve got a working kitchen here!  Hope you like cookies.”

Zhu perked up.  “Cookies?”  He asked.

”I do like cookies…”

”Oh, don’t admit that where she can hear you, you’ll be walking out of here with a hundred of them.”  Archie laughed.

James grinned widely.  “You have no idea how many people I have to feed cookies to, it’ll be fine.”  He paused.  “Actually you probably do know, I think you’ve met most of my people at this point.”

”Eh, most.”  Archie pointed menacingly at James, a bony elbow propped on the table.  “I want to meet this Sarah character who does your news reports.  She never asks the interview questions I want to hear the answers to!”

On the other side of the table, Vex buried her face in her hands.  “Gramps, you can’t just demand to meet people.”  She swept one hand out to indicate James.  “Especially not from my boss!”

”No no, this one’s okay.”  James said reassuringly as Zhu suppressed a laugh of his own.  “Sarah loves meeting contrary old geezers.”  He grinned at Archie, who grinned back at him.  “Of course Sarah loves meeting everyone.  Also I’m not your boss!”

“You pay me.”

”Bob pays you.  I think.”  There were three people in their accounting department that actually managed payroll, since Karen had moved on to optimizing new projects.  “I barely give you operational commands.  Also wait, are you actually her grandpa?”

Archie nodded with a smug grin.  “Sure am!  Hell of a thing, isn’t it?”  He jerked his thumb at Vex, who seemed to be either focusing on her turn in the game or having abandoned it altogether.  “This little brat was supposed to get one heck of an inheritance.  Now I find out it’s not that impressive!  I’ve got catching up to do!”

”Oh I bet Eileen and Chuck love that line of thinking.”  James said with a horrified snort.

Zhu tapped at James’ chin with a talon like he was thinking.  “Didn’t Eileen have custom leather armor?  I bet she’d love to go into a dungeon.  Oh!  I have a great idea for tomorrow!”  He exclaimed as James tried to grapple Zhu away from his face.

The grandparent gave him a smile that was a little too toothy.  “You think those two idiots aren’t exactly as put out as I am?  Heck no, Jimbo!”

”I promise you my name is James.”

”Nah, you don’t feel very much like a James.”  Archie shook his head.  “Get yourself a better name.  You know how much happier that makes people?  Look at Chuck!  You’ll get used to it, stop wasting time!”

Zhu’s manifested glowing form poked at James.  “You definitely need to bring Sarah here.  Then we can get everyone to team up on you!”  He threatened.

As always, James had no idea what he had expected walking in here today.  This wasn’t on his list anywhere though.  He also realized he’d had that exact same thought at least three times upon entering this specific building, so maybe he needed to show up here like he was on a dungeon delve and not on an actual task.  Expect nothing, prepare for anything.

Vex - who had spent the last thirty seconds of chatting sneaking cards from her hand onto the bottom of the pile on the table - gave James an apologetic look.  “Sorry, he’s like this.”  She said.  “So, you need me for something?”

”Actually no, I’m here for Charlie, I just wanted to say hi.” James told her with a casual shrug.

“You don’t want to talk about the-“ Vex’s words ran flatly into the interdiction of the Orphaned Recesses, and she went from relaxing and cheating at UNO to scowling.  “Did you not use the thing?  Come on, this sucks!”  She said, switching from her uncertain dancing around that she did in conversation with James to being irritated, which felt a lot more honest.

James pointed at her grandfather.  “Well…” he said.  “Also hi Archie, sorry, you know that thing where dungeons mess with memories and communication?”

The old man grunted and waved a hand.  “Yeah, yeah, I know, talk away.  Gives me time to stack the deck.”

”Wait what?”  Vex flicked her eyes back at him but saw nothing amiss, only her grampa smiling like an idiot.  “Fine, whatever you skeleton.”

”I also can’t talk about the thing!”  Zhu told her.  “Which is extra silly, because I am inside this dumbass, and I’ve also been in the dungeon?  The whole apparatus is like it’s a jet engine built out of craft supplies.  Really impressive, but I don’t think the dungeon knew navigators existed or would have to put up with it.  So I can just openly talk about domains and stuff even if other people are around - oh!  I got oil too!  So we need to hang out and you can show me stuff for that! - but I can’t talk about things I learned secondhand and it’s very dumb.”

Vex stared at the navigator with a look like she wasn’t sure if she was being messed with.  “Breathe, man.”  She told him.

”I don’t.”  “He doesn’t.”

”Well figure something out and do that.”  Vex shook her head.  “Whatever.  You know what I know?”  She asked James, and he nodded.  “And?”

”And I’m going in tomorrow to check it out.”  James said.  “Anyone is welcome to come along.  Though I might need to requisition your girlf-“ Vex’s eyes got wider than James had ever seen and she started making slashing motion with her hands between them, but he already had verbal momentum “-riend to open the door and whyyyyy are you panicking?”  Silently, Vex grimaced and her eyes drifted over to her grandfather, who was leaning forward and watching her with a piercing stare.  “…Vex, have you met Archie?”  James asked.

Zhu’s feathers flared up and he waved his own arm around to get attention, eyes all dancing with mirth.  “Wait, wait, let me do this one!”  He said, revving his voice in an imitation of clearing his throat.  “Vex.”  He said, also trying to mimic James’ own voice.  “Are you aware that your grandfather is in a reasonably gay polycule himself?”

”…No?” She said.

”Dammit, boy!”  Archie flicked one of the cards at Zhu with an impressive amount of accuracy, the corner plinking off the navigator’s mass without actually sinking into one of his eyes.  “I was saving that one!  Now I’m out one more surprise, and I’m losing ground on teasing my Vivi!”

”Oh god don’t call me thaaaaaat…” Vex, now bright red, started trying to hide under the table.  She flipped James off as she went, seeming actually kind of irate at him.

”…this has been great.”  James said, taking a quick breath and refreshing his smile for Archie.  “I’ve gotta go actually talk to Charlie, you two have fun cheating at each other, let me know who wins.  Also Archie, you guys are welcome to drop by the Lair sometime and maybe check out one of our other dungeons.  I know we never really talked about this, but… well, you guys are cool.  And I trust you more than some of the new kids when it comes to not dying in the Pylon or something.”

Archie snorted, flexing his arm.  “Yeah, eighty years of muscle in here!”  He joked.

James rolled his eyes, Zhu adding his own similar motion for a team effect.  “I am aware of what Kiki did to you all.  You can probably bench press more than me.”  He waved at them over his shoulder, Zhu also adding to that, as the two of them wove through the room toward his next conversation, James barely dodging the cat that seemed to have a preternatural understanding of just where the human was about to step.  He did not dodge Dance, who clipped him in her pursuit of the cat, yelling an apology as she kept going undaunted.  “Hey, how’re my favorite scouts today?”  James asked as he got to where Alice and Charlie were sitting with a plate of cookies between them.

He really hoped those were the cookies he’d been threatened with.  They looked delicious.

”We’re being lazy instead of following up on the thing in Chicago.  Why are we your favorites?  Wait, is the leaderboard real?”  Alice asked, mouth full, not looking up from the map she had open on her tablet.

Charlie answered in his curatedly neutral voice. ”We’re the favorites because we’re the only ones to bring back a dungeon.  Everyone else brought back bad news about pillars, a mandatory wave defense situation, or nothing yet.”  He explained.

”We brought back the Underburbs attack that one time.”  Alice pointed out to him.

”That would put us even with everyone else.”  Charlie’s voice didn’t waver; he’d gotten used to talking about the event in a way that wasn’t joking, but was familiar and no longer quite so painful.  “We still have one dungeon.  Mathematically, we are ahead.”

Zhu’s theatrical whisper to James cut across the little side reading area with the plush chairs that the scout team had commandeered.  “Maybe we should have a real leaderboard.  I bet it’d motivate them!”

”Don’t encourage them.”  James said, at the same time Charlie was saying almost the same thing.  James chuckled, before continuing.  “So.  I’m just here to check in on the bank dungeon, and also on your newest ward.  How’s Manon doing?”

At that question, Alice set her tablet down on the arm of the chair.  “He only really talks to Dancy, but… that’s more than he did when you sent him to us!  I see him smiling a lot, too!”

”He gave me a hug yesterday.”  Charlie said, still in his same neutral voice and typing up whatever he was working on.  When everyone else went quiet, he looked up to see the others staring at him with raised eyebrows.  “What?”

”What do you mean, ‘what’?!”  Alice leaned over, barely grabbing her tablet before she knocked it onto the floor, jabbing at Charlie’s side with one finger.  “You gotta tell me stuff like this!”

”Stop using your incomplete finger to stab me.”  Charlie told her with a professional glare, before looking back to James.  “I don’t really have the proper information to know how Manon is doing.  But I think he’s becoming more comfortable with us.”

Alice looked like she wanted to melt her partner with her glare alone.  “Jesus Christ I am going to shove an infomorph in your head that blocks your ability to use qualifying statements.”  She threatened.

”It’d explode from overeating.”  Zhu said with grim certainty.

Charlie frowned.  “Specificity is important.”  He said, unqualified, before continuing.  “The bank dungeon is a work in progress.  We’ve been putting together information on its entrance window, and I’d like to request a team to go in with to build on our preliminary exploration.  A large portion of the Northern Oklahoma Pro-“

”NOPGAS.”  Alice cut him off with a pleasantly oblivious smile as she held her screen up like she was hiding behind it.

”…Proud Grandparents Adv-“

”NOPGAS.”  The word was repeated.

”It generates more questions than it answers.”  Charlie sighed.  “Fine.  The local delvers.  They’ve expressed interest in coming along.  We believe that a larger expedition could get us a good picture of the early biomes and threats with minimal risk, more so than our team going in alone.”

”Well yeah, you guys aren’t delvers, exactly.”  James mused.  “Much to Dance’s chagrin, I believe?”  He caught Alice’s embarrassed wince and nodded.  “But yeah, one of the shield teams is finishing a portion of their ongoing training coming up here.  You’ve worked with Evans, right?”

”Not yet, but we’ve met in Townton.”  Charlie said.  “Regardless.  What I can tell you now is that the Wealth ‘mana’ is useful mostly for activating dungeontech, and while memories have been lost and we cannot confirm if this is confirmation bias, the majority of the identified dungeontech here is focused on creation and rearranging of useful material.”

”Like gold?”

”Like stuff.”  Alice corrected, raising her legs on some kind of deep reflex as first a cat and then a camraconda raced under her.  “Hey, don’t run into anyone Dance!”  She called after her retreating adopted daughter.  “Anyway yeah, it makes… what would you call it, consumer goods?”

”Products, maybe.”  Charlie said with a sharp nod.  “It’s often very specific and detailed, not useful as raw material.  I haven’t had time to do market research or run the numbers, but at a guess I would say that the bank’s magic outproduces most factory processes in terms of value per unit.  But this will require more information.”

”Which we can get you!” Alice said happily.  “Sometime next week, when I predict the door will open again.”

”Wait, I thought it was monthly?”  James asked curiously.

The woman shook her head, tapping her fingers together before arcing them apart as she explained.  “It’s messing with us.”  She said.  “The time differences themselves move in a pattern.  It’s not complicated, but it is enough to ffffffail a normal new delver group.”  She arrested her own profanity as Dance slithered up to her chair, the camraconda panting and out of breath.  “Hey Dancy, have fun?”

”The cat is mean!”  The young camraconda declared.  “It thinks its smarter than me!”

”…Dance, I don’t want to judge you personally,” Charlie said slowly,  “but we don’t know how smart Sir Ironpaw is, and she might actually be smarter than-“

”Mom!  Be more supportive of me!”  Dance demanded, swinging to stare at Alice.

”The cat seems really smart.”  Alice said with a muffled laugh.

Dance looked back at James and Zhu, who just shrugged at her.  James hadn’t gotten to talk to the cat.  But he kind of wanted to now.  Maybe offer a skulljack or something, just to see what would happen.  Dance seemed like she deflated as she flopped to the ground, and started slithering away, dragging her face on the carpet.  “I’m gonna go find Manon.  He won’t betray me!”

”Don’t wander too far!”  Alice told her, smiling as she looked back at James.  “Sorry.”

”Don’t be.”  He said with his own calm smile, feeling a strange echo of his earlier conversation with his partners bouncing around him.  “So, time pattern?”

”Right!  Five days from now!  And it should be a twelve hour window!  Or, if we think we can risk it, a two week gap before the door reopens.”  Alice offered.  “Now, I can already tell you what Charlie is going to say, and I can feel him frowning from all the way over here-“

Charlie was frowning. ”You are two feet away.”

”But I think, based on our first peek in there?  We can do two weeks with no problems.  Unless you want us back on the road?”  Alice glanced at her partner.

The frown Charlie was wearing went from consternated to considering.  “We don’t have any leads at the moment.  Second has been busy.”

That was a slight understatement.  Second was currently undergoing the AI version of either physical therapy or strenuous exercise, getting an anticipated upgrade to their hardware that included integration of a few pieces of equipment swiped from the Library.  It was, as far as James knew from his tracking of the conversation about it, going well, but it wasn’t an instant process and it was mentally taxing for the new arcane assisted intelligence.

It did mean that their supercomputer that could find the holes in patterns that indicated dungeons or other weirdness - the kind of information gaps that a lot of people had trouble seeing because of even just the casual residue of antimemetic effects - was on vacation at the moment.  And beyond that, James still needed to have a long and serious talk with Second about what the AAI actually wanted from life, and what they wanted to be, both as a person and as a member of the Order.

Also, James knew for a fact that when Charlie said they didn’t have any leads, that was a lie.  They just didn’t have any that weren’t being checked out by other teams, and for some reason the scout teams tried not to overlap their efforts.  Or maybe this whole thing, with this particular team hanging out in the Northern Oklahoma Proud Grandparents Adventuring Society hangout and mini-lair, was their form of a vacation.  The sort of downtime after a big event that James knew always revitalized him when it happened, and made the next step on the journey afterward feel welcome and not exhausting.

”I’ll get a team together if you guys figure out who here wants to go in.”  James said, sort of answering Alice’s question.  “If we have the interest from people who have expedition experience, then, yeah.  We’ll go for a longer delve.  I really want to tag along too, but I’ll probably only be there for the first little bit.”  James had too much to do, and his own tiny day without throwing himself into danger was more like a negotiation with the people who loved him, rather than actual downtime.  “In the meantime, do you guys need anything?”

”A sword!”  Dance declared, ambushing James as she returned with a crocamaw in tow.

James felt like he levitated a little at the startling exclamation.  He thought he had better situational awareness than that.  Though Zhu’s laughing probably meant the navigator was in on his plight, if not directly enabling it.  “I will not get you a sword.”  James said with a whoosh of breath as he held a hand on his chest.

”We all appreciate that!”  Alice laughed, while Charlie just raised a single eyebrow at him.

”Alright, thanks for the update.”  James said as Dance pouted, the crocamaw lightly patting her on the back in confused consolation.  “Five days.  Got it.  And your report on the server is up to date, right?  For assembling gear and stuff for this?”

”It will be by the time you talk to me again.”  Charlie said, raising his laptop threateningly.

”It’s weird he makes that sound ominous.”  Zhu pointed out, getting a burst of agreement from the other scout.

James nodded and stretched.  “Sounds good.  Alright, I’ll see you all when we’re about to fall out of reality then!”  He said, letting Zhu wave goodbye too before they wandered back through the building.

That was a few delves set up now.  Because James, while he was still waiting for the next problem, was aware that he couldn’t just let himself sit still.  It was either go delving and maybe make himself or his Order a little more of a problem, or it was… well, realistically, it probably wasn’t interfering with whatever JP was up to.  It would probably be going and joining Alex and Simon with their much more direct mess.  And he might just do that, but only if they really needed it.  James knew he couldn’t be everywhere.  He had to, at some point, trust the people who he had decided to trust, or else what was the point?

”Your brain feels like a commute.”  Zhu complained as James exited the Society’s version of a grand ballroom.  “Are you rationalizing again?  We talked about this.”

”You talked about this!”  James retorted cheerfully as he walked.  “I’m still worried about missing something important.”

”Hey, look, I’m not the expert on magic or anything,” Zhu quietly and ironically spoke, “but… it seems like a dungeon that has magic that makes things you might want for a city under construction is exactly what we want to be delving?  We don’t do targeted delves that often, but…”

James pursed his lips.  “I guess you’re right.”  He admitted.  “Yeah.  I mean, we are going to the Pylon just to try to find a ‘car’ that copies stuff, but you’re right on everything else.”  It was, even now, hard for James to grok the fact that delves were more than just a hobby.  That going into dungeons wasn’t the same thing as leaving the world to burn, because the things they found in dungeons were the fire extinguishers.

The noise Zhu made was like an engine stalling.  “You know, the downside to my growing and getting more powerful is that I can just barely hear when your metaphors break containment.”

”Sorry!”  James lied with a laugh, as he strolled toward the exit with a little more confidence.

He could have just teleported away.  But it felt right to go the long way around to the front door.

That might have been Zhu encouraging him to take a quiet walk, or, it might have been James secretly hoping to be ambushed and given a plate of cookies to take home.  Whichever one it was, though, they both got their wish.

_____

Karen had an odd relationship with the concept of mind control.

In many ways, her mind was under constant control.  She had kept a very tight leash on stray thoughts for the majority of her life, because those thoughts weren’t professional.  Weren’t normal.  Weren’t the kinds of things that were appropriate for a working wife.

Now, after over two years with the Order and a year of that living with them, Karen’s grip on that leash had started to slip.  Which was uncomfortable, because she had been schooling even her internal self for so long that the idea of being allowed to do something else was strange.  Karen could talk about her worries, and no one gave her strange looks.  She could think about breaking her routine, and not have to hold back because it would be disruptive to a schedule.  She could breathe, and not be belittled for sighing too deeply.

Her own self-inflicted mind control, which she knew was not actually purely from herself, wasn’t the only kind she had experienced though.  The thing from Officium Mundi - and Karen was shockingly relieved when they stopped joking that it had her name - that had collected humans like machine parts, had not been a pleasant encounter for her.  She hadn’t even known for a while how long she had been wired into a forced group mind.  Her apparently latent telepathy used for almost a year as a weapon against the dungeon, her body left to atrophy until she, too, would be thrown aside and replaced.

No individuality there.  No concerns at all.  No social norms or politeness.  There was just blank obedience because conceptualizing something more wasn’t possible.

Perhaps it was that encounter that had made her loosen her own interest in the way she modulated her own thoughts.  What was the point in reducing herself to a cold professional tool, when there wasn’t a good reason for it?  ‘Someone else wants me to be useful to them’ was, it turned out, not good enough for Karen.

And then, the next time she had a run in with a mental compulsion, it was from a distance.  Auditing records of the Mormon church and their large scale child abuse scheme, seeing in clinical terms the damage that was inflicted by forcing young humans to make themselves believe, word by word.  Magic that could change a mind like that was almost worse than what the hiring manager did to her; because at least when she was made into a finger puppet Karen was fully removed from the world while it happened.  This, this was…

Well it was like what she’d done to herself, over her whole adult life.  Except faster, and crueler, and magically enforced.

For all of that, Karen surmised, the logical thing to do would be to hate any scrap of mind control.

And yet, as she sipped at her morning tea and looked across the dining table, observing the camraconda she lived with caught briefly in the cool light that leaked through into their strange shared apartment, Karen wondered why she didn’t mind this that much.  Or at all, truly.

Amber Icon was a spell from the same source as Mindful Reverberation - that afformentioned child abuse enabling magic - that would produce a glass of nutritious if odd tasting beverage.  If the person casting the spell put enough work into it, then it could fill a person’s nutritional needs for a day with only a few hours work.  Even better, eventually it would make a second mug.

Those mugs, especially the more advanced ones, were quite durable, and were becoming a common sight getting frequent reuse in the Lair’s eatery and even down in Townton.

The strange and magical thing of it was, when two people drank what came in the paired mugs, it changed them.  Mentally.  Emotionally.  In many ways, it changed how they approached the world and especially how they approached each other.

Amber Icon made two people closer.  It took their bond, and it amplified and crystallized it.

It was mind control.  Obviously.  Karen had scoffed at any attempt to call it something else.  Dressing things up with imprecise language was itself offensive to her, and this spell definitely did do something to the minds that drank deeply of its offering. 

But she and Texture-Of-Barkdust had still drank deeply of it together.

Karen watched the sea-green and sky-blue camraconda from over her teacup, quietly smiling as Texture used a mechanical limb to gently leaf through a small publication.  She didn’t know how she had ended up in a position where she would willingly subject herself to more mind control.  She didn’t know how she had ended up living with someone who wasn’t human.  She didn’t know how she had missed that she was growing closer and closer to a person she worked with.  She didn’t know how she had ever failed to realize how lonely she had been; how gnawingly cold life had felt when even the relatively unhappy marriage she was in had gone away and all she was left with was a daughter that Karen had almost felt like a stranger to.

She didn’t know when she had fallen in love.

And even now, she struggled with that.  With the word itself.  Saying it in her head made her stomach twist with guilt and fear, and Karen knew damn well that this was a form of a more mundane mind control from her old life.  The lifelong ingrained chain that was the belief that she needed to be normal.  That she needed to marry a man and have children and work a professional job and never step outside the lines.  But now she was outside every line, and the old chains hadn’t actually gone away.  Karen wasn’t holding her own leash, but she was still tangled in it.

Maybe that was why, when Texture-Of-Barkdust had suggested that they share the more advanced Amber Icon drink, Karen had said yes with only a little hesitation.

The camraconda shifted, rays of cool daylight through the curtains seeming to splinter against her matte metal head as her lens caught Karen’s gaze out of the corner of Texture-Of-Barkdust’s vision.  The tightly bound cables around her mouth pulled back enough to reveal gleaming brass fangs in a small smile before Texture shifted again and settled herself in the basket chair and kept up her reading.

Karen sipped her warm tea and realized she was smiling so much her face hurt.

What was a little mind control when she couldn’t even tell what it had changed?  Karen knew something was different.  Knew things would never be the same.  Knew that her partner was the anchor for the life she suddenly found she was doing more with than counting down to the end of.  But she knew that before.  Didn’t she?

Or did she need something to remind her?

She was still trying to understand what Amber Icon actually did, but sometimes, when she found herself watching the camraconda’s tail escape around a corner, or when she met Texture-Of-Barkdust’s gaze while they got dinner together, or when Liz visited what was ostensibly her home and gave the two of them hugs in no particular order, Karen believed she understood.

It didn’t change anything.  It was mind control, only in the sense that it controlled the mind to know.  To not be allowed to look away from something beautiful out of shame or guilt or puritanical fear of being different.

Karen had a strange relationship with mind control.  But a perfectly lovely one with the person sitting across from her as she started her morning.

That relationship, however, included actual work which they did together.  And as pleasant as it was to have the time to slowly wake up and face the day without a rush, they did have a few things on deck that needed to be addressed.  Redoing the replication ritual priorities, for one.  And doing more dry trial runs for the shipping company that was set to begin operations in a week.  Texture-Of-Barkdust also had a call scheduled for later to arrange for another large scale sale of the Order’s platinum supply, which could easily double the organization’s income and make Robert’s job quite a bit harder, which made Karen glad she had abdicated their lead accounting position already.

Valuable work on valuable projects, things that could tangibly improve the world, that had worth.  If there was nothing else going on in the Order, Karen liked to think that alone would have kept her around.

For now, though, she wiped away the small drop of moisture that had formed in the corner of her eye and sat her mostly empty teacup down.  Texture-Of-Barkdust turned to her fully, similarly placing the small folded paper flyer with what looked like a hand drawn cover on their table, lens focusing on Karen’s face before she ducked her head with a long and sibilant hiss.  Karen shook her head with her own quiet smile before she decided to ask about something coming up that day, and opened her mouth.

”I love you.”  She said, somehow, before clapping an aging hand over her mouth.

Texture-Of-Barkdust’s hiss took on an almost high pitched whine as she raised her heavy head back up, her own digital voice replying from the speakers in the half-collar she wore.  “And I love you.”  The camraconda told her human that was framed in the warm shadows of their shared kitchen by the light coming through the balcony door.  No hesitation at all between the hearing and the responding.

The two of them sat together for another several minutes, staring at each other without realizing that neither of them had blinked in a while, before Karen trusted herself to speak properly.  “We do still have appointments to keep.”  She pointed out.

”Yes, yes, motivation to train our replacements, I suppose.”  Texture-Of-Barkdust said with her own recovered composure.  “Shall we?” She asked, slithering from her chair.

”I believe we shall.”  Karen replied with an unfamiliar lilt to her voice.  “Oh, your usual cloak is in the laundry.  One of the other options?”

”I do not feel up to looking like a noble knight today, so no thank you.  Perhaps a scarf, for the cold.”  Texture-Of-Barkdust mused as Karen slipped her shoes on.  “And it may make my conversation partner more comfortable when I visit.”

Karen nodded and took one of the scarves off the hook by the door, kneeling with an almost easy motion and folding the scarf around Texture’s neck in a loose knot.  Texture’s ongoing talk therapy with a certain goliath of a ratroach had stopped concerning her since after the first few times when her camraconda had returned unscathed.  “Comfortable?”  She asked.

”Quite.”  She replied as she mirrored the motion with a much less colorful scarf for Karen that matched the dull red of her suit jacket.  “Now let us go and see what has been done to our organization system in our absence.”  She said, slithering through the front door to their home that Karen held open for her.

The human watched the camraconda for only a few seconds before following.  Thoroughly mind controlled, and yet, somehow, in no hurry to correct that.

_____

There was something incredibly annoying to James about having a dungeon based problem that should have had a dungeon based solution, but didn’t.

Not because the solution didn’t exist, not because the magic wasn’t good enough, not because they hadn’t developed their own study enough to take advantage of it, but for the simple reason that he had, personally, failed at something.

The Beautiful One, or the ratroach that had used to be her anyway, was broken in a hundred different horrifying ways.  And there were a  frustrating number of barricades between all of the things that should have repaired that damage and putting those things to work.

Well, mostly one barricade.  The fact that people grew a tolerance to shaper substance over time.

The ratroach body could operate while dealing with a tremendous number of flaws.  Incomplete lungs that locked up when used for speaking, a stomach that didn’t digest rice properly, eyes that stung under any kind of light, hide that was coated in what seemed like multiple layers of different fungal or bacterial infections, a muzzle that didn’t even close properly, and so many very literal rough edges.  But all of that could be worked on if a patient could be bought the time needed to study their own physiology and make the transition to a new body; or, if they could trust enough, to let one of the Order’s own experts plug into their brain and take control for the change.  And getting that time was almost easy, because they could survive all that nightmarish damage already, and a little help went a long way.

James could remember how, when Arrush and Keeka had first come to the Order, it had taken two purple orbs, skill ranks in a couple languages, and a daily dose of potion, and they got to live with less pain than they’d ever known before.

Except, well, ratroaches were people.  And the more a person - any person - used shaper substance, the worse it got to use in the future.  The body twisted against the changes someone tried to make, until eventually a point was reached where there simply wasn’t any safe threshold, and any shaper substance use would go wrong.

And when that stuff went wrong, it didn’t kill you.  It just left you in sharp, consistent, ongoing, pain.

The Beautiful One hadn’t just casually dabbled in shaper substance.  She had indulged, deeply and vigorously.  She was several thousand pounds of weaponized flesh and chitin, fur gleaming and beetleshell casing opalescent, claws that had been sharp enough to hack apart anything that threatened her.  And a body that she had pushed so far that it produced more of its own shaper substance, even.  Though at least that didn’t affect her.

So now, the purple orbs that were meant to be temporary patches were things that might need to be longer term duct tape over the gaps.

When James had met the Beautiful One, she had been… well, just another ratroach, really.  When he had taken Arrush and Keeka away from her, she had been larger and sleeker, but no more modified than either of them had been.  Now, though?

She had made herself into something terrifying.  And James felt a sick guilt over it.  Because he could have just ripped her out of the Sewer at any time, and he’d left her there.  And the excuse that the Sewer had been eating any thought of rescue for her after it had noticed what they were doing was… an excuse.  Useless.  James did not care if it was true or not, because it wouldn’t change the fact that they could have fixed her wholly if he had been faster and smarter and better at his single job.

He ran through these thoughts while looking through a security glass barricade at the massive ratroach’s medical ‘nest’.  The last time he’d been here, he hadn’t really done well with seeing the ratroach in person, and again there was some kind of hostile infomorph to blame for it.  The Akashic Sewer, James thought with a scowl, seemed to be breeding a lot of those things, and that was something he didn’t approve of at all.  The fact that the Order was going back into the Sewer soon, to map changes after a chunk of time away and also to discourage it from sending out hunters, just made him more uncomfortable with the idea of factal-sized infomorphs that could make you hate yourself.

“I can do that enough on my own without help.”  James muttered, a little too loud.

”What was that?”  Holly asked, the woman approaching from behind him to open the way to the remodeled interior area of the barn with a small hiss of air from the door.  “Also we can go in now, she’s conscious and lucid today!  You came at a good time, she needs more visitors.”

That made James feel even more self conscious.  ”Not sure I’m the person she wants to see.”  He said, as he followed the doctor in, with one of the two people keeping watch at the observation desk trailing after just in case something went wrong.  James wondered how much the Beautiful One noticed the security, if she had any resentment over the fact that people with guns were tracking her moves because no one trusted her fully not to lash out.

Holly just patted him on the shoulder in the most awkward gesture of human reassurance James had ever experienced in his life.  The woman was constantly smiling, and seemed like she did good work, but he got the impression she’d been very happy to get a job that didn’t involve talking to anyone.  “I’m sure it’ll be okay.”  She told him, moving around into the ratroach’s field of vision.  “Hello hello.  Are you up for another guest today?”  Holly asked the Beautiful One.  She must have nodded, because Holly motioned him over into her line of sight a few seconds later.

James sighed and stepped forward, looking at the curled up mass of a creature that had substantially fewer tubes and needles involved now compared to when he’d first shown up here.  And he noticed, instantly, that she was hiding how well she could move.  James didn’t know why he could tell, but the Beautiful One was definitely acting like she was more hurt and far less mobile than she actually was.

He said nothing about that.  Though he kept it in mind if she tried to kill him.  “Hi.”  He said instead, finding his voice a little rough.

The dungeon creation stared at him with the cluster of her eyes that wasn’t pressed down into the pillows.  Even with her bed being lower to the floor than most any hospital bed ever was, she was at eye level with James, and he had the sudden understanding of just how concerning it could be to be locked in a room with a predator that was a lot bigger than yourself.  “You.”  She said.

James couldn’t help himself.  He smiled.  “Your voice sounds better!”  He told her.

The Beautiful One’s muzzle twisted into something that looked like it was a very tired snarl, and then she closed her eyes.  “Goawwway.”  She mumbled.  “I… can’t.”

”Okay.”  James said without hesitation.  “I’m…” his voice choked on the word.  “I’m glad you’re doing better.  If you’re comfortable talking with me eventually, let Holly know, okay?”  He turned to leave, seeing the doctor hanging back and checking something on one of the monitors.

”Wait!”  The ratroach said as James started leaving, one of her paws snapping out in his direction before yanking on the restraint she had on with a loud snap of the material.  “W-wait!”

James wasn’t above admitting he’d jumped when she’d moved, but the motion wasn’t an attack, and he could tell that too.  “Yeah?”  He asked, trying to smile as he turned around.

The Beautiful One stared at him, motionless, before she started to move with laborious effort.  A couple of her paws tucked under her head and body shoving her bulk upward, her form rising by inches off the padding to pull her head up to stare at James with as many of her eyes as were actually still working.  He hadn’t noticed before, and hadn’t been able to bring himself to read the medical reports, but at least a few of her eyes were a milky grey and probably couldn’t see anything at all.

James didn’t step back, but he didn’t get any closer to the maw that might be about to try to snap him in half.  He just watched the Beautiful One, trying to not let his expression twist into something of sad pity and sadder self-loathing.  He barely noticed the guard behind him as the man sucked in a sharp breath and moved to put James out of any potential line of fire. 

Whatever she was looking for in him, it took her long enough to find it that her arms started to wobble, and the ratroach collapsed back down to her nest with a thump.  “S-s-sorry.”  She uttered.

”It’s alright.”  James said on reflex.  “What… what did you want?  Is there something you need?  I don’t know what I can really offer but if there’s anything-“

”No!”  The Beautiful One snapped at him fiercely.  “I.  Am. Sorry!”  Her voice, repaired to functionality through almost a dozen purple orbs that all had unintentional future consequences for a ratroach specifically, shot through the room like a knife.

James opened his mouth, and nothing came out.  He’d come here to… well, it sounded stupid, but he was here just to check on her.  To ask a few questions about the Sewer before he did something dumb on a delve when he could just debrief an ex-resident instead.  To maybe see that she was doing alright, and that he didn’t have to feel quite so much like shit about the situation himself.

He didn’t know where to go with this.

But a moment later, he took an unconscious step forward toward her little nest.  And then another, more on purpose, and another, until James was standing next to the person who had tried to murder him multiple times, who was not as restrained as everyone thought, who was looking at him like he was finally going to kill her like she had expected when she’d been ripped away from the Sewer.  Less than a foot from the fangs and claws and the girl who his boyfriend had once asked ‘could she have been my sister’ of.

James slowly lowered himself down to the ground, one of his knees scuffing against the sterile flooring as he turned and let his back thump against the edge of her bed.  “I’m sorry too.”  He said, leaning his head back so that his neck curved over the edge of the bed.  He’d done this at home a thousand times, when relaxing or playing or having an existential crisis with his lovers.  And now he mirrored that motion here, on someone else’s bed.

”Why?”  The Beautiful One asked him, the word coming out like she was still surprised how smoothly and quickly she spoke.  James could feel her breath on the back of his head, but he didn’t move away.  It felt too personal, now.

”Why am I sorry?”  He snorted.  “Because I fucked up.  Because I didn’t save you when I could.  Because this is my fault, or it feels like my fault.  Why, what about you?”

”I hurt you.”  She said, obviously confused, especially as James waved a hand from just below her and banished the other armed human and also the woman with the needles and medicines and too many strange words.  “Hated you.  Hate you.”

James nodded, a sad smile unseen on his face.  “Sure, but I mean, why are you sorry?  It’s just… you don’t need to apologize to me.  I get it.  I know what happened, but I’m not mad.”

”Don’ know.”  She muttered as she failed to keep herself from sinking further into her bedding.  “Why… are you?”

James blinked back sudden surprised tears.  “I said I… oh.”  He realized something.  They were talking at different directions, and he was answering the wrong question.  “Because I don’t want to be the kind of person who hurts people and doesn’t care.  Because… because you deserved better.  And if I apologize, it reminds me that I have to do better.”

”You hate me.”  The massive ratroach challenged him with a wet hiss.

”I can’t hate you.”  James said softly, quiet words that were just for her.  “I won’t hate you.  I refuse.”  He closed his eyes as he heard the Beautiful One shifting behind him.  Something had cracked between them, and James somehow knew that she wasn’t going to hurt him.  But he was still surprised when her muzzle settled over his shoulder, one of her paws placed on the edge of her nest on the other side of his head.  He saw the guards on the other side of the barrier start to panic as they realized the Beautiful One had way more range of motion than she should have, but James didn’t feel threatened.  Partly because he still had at least one safety charm on him, but still.  “Hey.”  He muttered to her, not wanting to talk to loud into her ears.  “What’cha doing?”

”I… don’t know.”  She replied.  “How do I be strong?”  Her claws, even blunted down, sank into the padded side of the bedding as she clenched her paw.  “How… do I do what you do?  Make it stop hurting?”

James raised his hand and twisted his wrist around, grateful for the orb that gave him a greater flexibility because otherwise it would suck to need to rotate this far just to cup his fingers over her clawed paw.  “Physically?  I listen to people like Holly that’re smarter than me and know how to put my body back together.”  James offered.  “But that’s not what you meant, right?”

”Nnnno.”

”No.  Well.  Bad news.”  He sighed.  “I don’t know.  Talking helps, but…”

”Talking hard.”  The Beautiful One said, clipping her words even though she didn’t really need to.  She was still getting used to her voice, and might be doing so forever.

James nodded.  “You know what I do know helps, though?”  He asked, and felt her focus settle on him like a radar lock.  Sighing, he squeezed the paw that was still ripping holes in her bed, and turned his head so that he was meeting the cluster of eyes that were peering at him from inches away.  His next words, he intoned like a ritual, and not a conversation, because it was a ritual.  An important one, too.  “I forgive you.”  He told her solemnly.  “I know you hurt me.  And I forgive you.  And it can get better.”

The Beautiful One twisted away, nearly toppling James as she pulled her head back with a sudden wet sniff that heralded a river of glowing blue tears flowing from her eyes.  And James got a reminder that while purple orbs could do a lot, they couldn’t make ratroaches less corrosive. Yet, anyway.

”Why… here… just to say… thaaaat?”  The massive ratroach asked between heaving breaths, as if she were trying to force herself to not cry by simply being irately distracted.

”Oh.  I… uh… I was here to ask you tactical questions about the Sewer.”  James said, almost laughing at how silly he sounded.  “Sorry.  It’s… it’s not important.  But there’s a delve - what we call it when we send a team into a dungeon - coming up, and I was going to see if you knew some things that we didn’t so it would be safer to explore.”

The ratroach latched onto something in his words.  “You will hurt it.”  She said.  Not really a question, but James nodded slowly, looking at her from where he was sitting against the bed with grim determination.  “Like… when you took me.”

”Yeah.”  He didn’t have anything to add.

The Beautiful One - or maybe she had a different name now, James felt like an idiot for not asking - stared at him as she forced her thoughts to do what she wanted them to.  To focus on a problem.  To refuse to feel hate.  To be forgiven.  And, most importantly, to stop crying before she ruined everything valuable.

”I will tell you things.”  She told the paladin.  “Sssssoon.”  She added, struggling to pull in air all of a sudden, needing to catch her breath to continue talking, even if her throat and tongue no longer stung like they once had.

James settled in, shifting to a more comfortable seating position.  “I’ve got some time.”  He said calmly, wiping at his own cheek with the shoulder of his shirt.  “Are you okay, though?”

”Tired.”  The ratroach admitted before going through the all too familiar pattern of realizing she’d said too much and tensing up for an assault on her vulnerability, before forcing herself to believe that wouldn’t happen.  “…Please stay?”  She asked, hearing her words crack as she almost chittered like one of the even more broken versions of her species.

”Sure.”  James reassured her.  “Go at your own speed.  I’m not going anywhere.”

At least, not until tomorrow.  And then the day after that.  And then later in the week.  And then whenever that Pylon delve was scheduled.

But not right now.

Right now, James felt like he was somewhere he could actually do some good.  And that felt more magical than any of the dungeon stuff at the moment.