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MPL Ep 39 - High-Res Artwork + Discussion (Patreon)

Published:
2020-07-04 01:51:08
Edited:
2020-08-08 01:27:31
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

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Content

Yay a hug. I always come up with a ton of things to talk about in these discussion posts, the night before episode drop day, but all of that always promptly disappears when I post. It'll probably come up again some time later.Issa paper plane :3

Files

Comments

Elizabeth

That episode length, that CONTENT. It was everything. I'm crying.

Myruhhz

I haven’t stopped crying since 6

Marie-Michele

I literally am listening to collide as I read it. It’s beautiful

Caslpk

Ouch. Just ouch 😢💔

Maddie O.

I’m so so so sad. 😭😭😭😭

Jas

I just wanna listen to Adele and cry after reading this 🥺

Jaki

I'm still crying 😭😭

lilkingtrashmouth

1. TORA BETTER GET HIS DUMBASS BACK OVER THERE & LOVE THAT WOMAN I STG 2. WHAT’S IN THE FUCKING PAPER PLANE

TanyaC9

I'm a mess right now. 😭😭 but I know they'll see eachother soon when she goes to talk to Quincey.

Pip Finter

It will all be ok. It will all be ok. It will all be ok...

madam_volta

I legit started crying 💔

Pleione

Same as above 😭 so so sad

Rebeca

The scrunchie getting crushed KILLED ME 🥺🥺 and omg, Tora’s ring ☹️🥺

Brooke

First time a webtoon has made me legit cry 😭

Lacey Blankenship

I was not prepared. You warned us to have tissues ready, but I was not prepared for this. My heart is broken. I just.. I need to go have a moment. Lily, that was beautiful and heartbreaking and perfectly written. You are a true artist and know how to make us feel so strongly. I am so anxious but can't wait to see where this goes and how you get us there.

Blasianz

MY HEART.... Listening to the song definitely​ gave the episode an additional layer that was so heartbreaking and beautiful and like faaackkkk... i still have tears in my eyes as im typing this. For ya'll who haven't read the episode yet, LISTEN to Collide by Howie Day while tackling this weeks episode.

MaeT

Like, god dang it Im sitting here crying because I'm wrecked. Absolutely destroyed. HOW DO I GO ON FROM HERE?!?!

Michelle Rodriguez

💔💔 why did you have to go and break my heart like that

lilkingtrashmouth

3. this episode made me so emotional it should be illegal wtf

Shoelace

First of all she is wearing the necklace every day, Second her mom looks like she got a second life that we’re not gonna find out about till later

Maudie

Everybody's corazoncito right now 💔😭

Lilydusk

Guys I ugly cried for 4 days in a row when I was working on this. Y'all got nothing on me 🤣🤣❤️❤️

Roxyfoxyrachel

LILY I AM CRYING!!! You really did it this time. Oh my God RIP my heart!! He still has the hair band! And the little gifts he left her... i just... i can't. This story touches my heart in a way no other has, so thank you for that

Blasianz

God damn Lily... Tora giving her his ring and wrist band... and Tora thinking that Poppy came for him in the end but then just faded away.... THE FEELS. Was he gripping Poppys Strawberry hair tie in his pocket?!

caseyjarryn

My poor heart!! Lily, why must you do this to us?! 😭

Leslie

I........I....... Yeah. Guys I’m calling out of marble-catching tonight because I just.....I need to go somewhere quiet for a little while. And feel very sad. I will maybe come on tomorrow with deeper responses to Lily’s incredible work.....but I think right now I need to go sit with my heart and not my brain. Hugs to all you. See you tomorrow. ❤️❤️❤️

Emily Neilsen

No not goodbye plus birthday alone 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Cass

do you guys think this is when she’s gonna to “fall in love “ with quincy?

Bronwyn Stoddard

You guys, I can't stop crying. This just made me relive so many wrong place, wrong time moments from my own life 😭

Afton Jennings

I'M TYPING THROUGH SOME REAL ASS JESUS TEARS RN OH GOD

Aysia

Tora and Poppy are so perfect together 😭 I really can't wait until they start dating for real and all thr sweet moments that will come behind that! I know once Quincey is in the mix, they'll see each other more!!!

RaineReigns

SHUT UP & HUG ME BACK!!! 😭 my poor heart wasn’t ready for this chapter. 😭

Kae

Why does this hurt my heart so much 😫 💔

GenX

While I was reading the comics, the music I had in the background was about goodbyes. Darn, I felt that goodbye between those two. It had to be on her birthday. What a way to rip my heart. 😔

Mu

Im crying. Im crying real tears 😥

Veeda Alahari

They already love one another it feels like. Maybe not IN LOVE quite yet, but they definitely have love for one another.

Demi Ricci

Tora leaning on his car after dropping off Poppy🥺💔

Lise

That episode was everything. ♥️♥️♥️

Emily Basso

Y’all get NOTHING from me tonight. I’m an emotional wreck, I feel like I was hit with a Mac truck at 3 separate points, I’m going to be crying on and off for a while and maybe if I’m lucky I’ll be able to make sense of this later. Buy y’all, group hug times a million right now 😭🤗😭🤗😭🤗

Allie Kelly

Must sleep but can’t wait to read all you beautiful peoples comments tomorrow. This story is a gift and perfectly illustrated how emotional abuse can undermine your confidence in everything. Lily you are amazing.

Fe

....I didn't expect to cry so hard. Man. Like real tears...sheesh. Such a good episode, but my tiny grinch heart...I just..I need a minute.

patience

*shakes fist at the sky* WHY!

Amanda Rae

I was totally fine and happy until that damn bento box!!! 😭😭. Poppy seems to have healed from her pain but Tora just keeps himself in his. But you know he kept her 🍓 hairtie in his pocket. ❤️❤️ but... 💔

Mishka Athena

I don't know what to do with myself after reading that

Heather Hutton

I am fucking crying. The ring, braclet, and paper airplane. My heart can't. That massive goodbye hug. Dear god. And her birthday....Lily you broke me.

Meggy

....I’m so sad 🥺

Shay

🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭😭 so good! This whole episode was so sweet. Is it really goodbye for a bit 😢?? oh no are things going to be escalating in the danger department? Ugh Julri or however you spell his name was such a dick😡. Did he know it was her birthday I wonder??? Since he had Gyu do a background check and get all her info.

Tyana Ortiz

Please tell me this isn’t the end...😭😭😭

Martina Csiki

3.01am...this episode...I'm just going to the corner and cry myself out...

A. Paz Díaz

Ok. THIS IS DOING SOME ILLEGAL SHIZ TO MY POOR HEART. it literally ached seeing them reminiscing right after they‘ve said goodbye. Seriously Lily this is some monster level rollercoaster. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR WORK. -feeling blessed-

Ally

Wow my heart is literally torn in two. Lily, you are a master storyteller and artist. Never have I ever read a story that made me have literal tears and just sit there in my feelings. You’re amazing!!

Blancaliz Fernandez

Wow this episode hit me like a train. I always re read them like twice back to back but with this one, I need a few days fam.

Megan Renobato

I just became a patron a few days ago and I’m so glad I did. I love this WEBTOON!!!

Natalia

Ahh my heart Lily!! 😭😭 My heart is in pieces after this episode...each piece a different emotion/feeling. I haven't cried before over a webtoon, but here I am, crying over my first webtoon lol. Thank you tho, because as always, it was beautiful 💜💜💜 I'm so invested in this, from your writing/storytelling of Tora and Poppys story. I prayyyyy that these tears turn into heart clenching smiles next week lol 🤞🤞

Ohmyvegeta

I can't with this one. I almost died! My heart can't take this agony 😭😭😭 beautiful as always. Now to build a time machine. 🤔

Lilydusk

He gave Poppy up and is content to have her hairtie instead. Everyone hug me now pls 🥺🥺😂

J-nell

Literally felt that hug within the recesses of my soul. I know this can't be the last time they see each other but damn this episode hurt 😢💔

Annie J

My god, my heart. 💔 He lost his light. I can't say anymore more. Lily....❤❤❤❤❤❤

Ann Om

Love ain’t patient, and love ain’t kind. Real love is hard work, and a pain in the ass... They’ll find their way back to each other. I have faith! 🖤

Kali Duke

I am sobbing 😭

Roxanne Ferland

I’m a mess!!!! A part of me can’t believe it!!! They have to be together!!! They are like peanut butter and strawberry jelly!!! They are made for one and the other !!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️😭😭😭😭

Pribbz

The bracelet and ring!!! The hair tie?! All of the other things that I can’t type right now but I saw! They are tucked in the back of my head until I stop dying. 😭

Bre513

Tears 😭

Tiffanyyyyy B

Wow, I started to feel it. I'm generally one of those self sabotaging people and I tend to think the worst. It literally seemed like a dream come true and I was crushed when it was goodbye. & it being her birthday was just the thing that broke my heart in two 😭😖 I hope its not the end. Thanks so much for the balance though. That tiny bit of comic relief helped but this episode was simply bittersweet.

Kayla

I am NOT okay.😭😭😭😭😭😭

Cheesely

IM CRYING SO MUCH! I loved all the little details, like Tora holding Poppy’s shoes and then at the end Tora holding the strawberry hair tie she gave him. It’s such a bittersweet episode.

Lola

Good evening. We are gathered here to witness my lack of marbles. Hi. Oh God that panel again. Thank you!!! The colors are so beautiful. The landscape is adorable. They look so cute together despite the rope and heavy conversation. I see you there with the clarification, Poppy. Ex. Bolded. Just in case he don’t know. Lol @ jerkwad tho OMG TORA!!! Not keen on hearing about it either!! Tora looking like he’s about to rip him a new one. Concerned about Poppy being treated right! Ugh. Baby! Looks a bit irritated but ok. He’s got a point. Poppy opening herself up and her self esteem issues coming out. Oof girl. Yes. I felt that so much. Stupid ex’s. Replaying conversations ✅ Making sense of things ✅ Insomnia ✅ Being gaslighted ✅ Good Lord. Poor baby girl. Ok wait. She is saying these horrible things that happened but let us stop for a thirst interlude and: Look at how Tora is holding her closer, his arm around her arm and HE’S HOLDING HER SHOES FOR HER?!?! Help me baby Jesus Ejdneinfkendkendkdnkdndkdndkdndkndkdmdkdndndndmdnnfnfnfnf Good Lord those calves ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) “Never easy when you are trapped in the inside” oh Lord. 🥺 Look at him protecting her feelings with “I hope you’re not blaming yourself”. Honestly, thirst and everything aside, this is a really good sign from Tora. The opposite of a red flag: a GREEN flag? Yes. Sure, that. This reminds me of my husband actually. He makes me feel so supported no matter what happens and by taking away that “edge” of self blame, I have felt my burdens become easier to bear. But that grip tho ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) No nose Tora! She gets away with murder, that’s what. If you can find someone who knows the way up. I see you, I SEE YOU TORA! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) sly dog. Goodbye for us now What What What What is happening What What What do you mean ????????b ????? No, no, no, no. Shadow division sounds pretty badass tho. Lol @ Aniki gigolo Relieved? NO I AM NOT. Thanks for asking? Pfft. I just This is so bittersweet. The badumps but him saying goodbye. Telling her he has been honest. She thinking about the stupid ex? :/ But Tora wait wait wait ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) “look in the damn mirror” . You cute. Omg Omg Omg Hug?! Nejdndkdndof dkndkdnfkdndkdnkrndkdk I know this is not a sexual hug (or whatever that means) but God. Tora’s empathy and seeing her needing comfort and being the man she needs him to be despite who he is and despite what he has to do for his job and be away from her. This is so beautiful. My feelings. “I know what that means” lmao proving my theory that Tora just hides behind a certain vocabulary so people don’t know how SMORT he really is. Smort. Yes. Hug me back. AND A THANK YOU? What What What What What is happening!!!! Poppy making such a big impact on his life. Ugh. Lol “you’re using it all wrong”, no Poppy. He really is thanking you for all you have done for him. I know in my heart of hearts this is true. Defection with sexual innuendo strikes again. I see you, Tora. 🚨Dimples and WRINKLES. 🚨 HEE HEE LMAAAAAOOOOO IT WAS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE WANTED TO SPEND IT WITH TORA?! And she didn’t tell him?!! WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT LILY!!!!!! What What what What Mom don’t look super happy. :/ She was protecting his feelings? JFC Omg Omg Omg Omg His bracelet and ring and a paper airplane Guys I’m crying LILY WHAT I NEED A HUG. Someone sedate me. Ativan. Please. Stat. 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Veeda Alahari

Usually we can put in predictions and wonder what could happen next, even if it’s completely wrong. But I’m so shook at what happened, I have NO IDEA what to expect. Will the next episode’s setting be weeks, months, or years later? Will poppy move on? Will she be successful at finding quince herself? Will tora be unable to stay away from her and maybe keep track of pops with the help of gyu? Will she wear the ring and bracelet for the rest of her life??? WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN.

Liz Z.

Husband knew something was off bc I'm usually so, so excited to talk about Tora and Poppy but tonight all I could say was "That was fucking sad babe" and he was like 😳 "oh shit they break up?" and I just silently saw myself to the bed and now I'm just going to burrito myself in a blanket and call it a night. 😭 It was beautiful though, Lily has a very special way of creating such humanity and real raw feelings with her art. So talented! I'm looking forward to reading all the comments tonight and the days following!

Scarlett3m

AKSHHAKDHAHAH )'''':

Amanda

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I know angst was going to come at some point. We had so much happiness and cuteness.

Talisha

😢😢 why Lily. I know you warned us but 😢😢 It was a beautiful chapter but 😢😢 My heart broke more in that episode then it ever has after a breakup 😢😢

Lauren Hoover

Did we just break up? 😭😢 I feel like I need to text him... lol

A Texan Loving Texas

You know I like the emotion on this chapter it was true. Not anyone can do that in stories . Thanks lily ♡

Christina Agan

Well, is anyone else a broken, sobbing, mess of snot bubble producing humanity right now? Or is it just me? I didn’t think a webtoon was capable of absolutely breaking my heart into tiny little pieces, but here I am, sitting in bed and sobbing. He was waiting for her. He’s always going to be waiting for her. This episode just broke me.

CNanda

Somehow there’s something sweet about their hug and goodbye. Now if you excuse me, I’m gonna silently cry in the corner. Thanks 💔

Madi

What a ride!! Her mom looks like a badass though! That’s where she got that killer focused stare from. I’m so excited to see where we go from here!

Erica Vanesa

I am in legit pain right now omg...all the feels in this episode yet so beautiful...gosh Lily you are so talented. You’ve got us all bawling like babies 😩😭

Kristinniicole

I did not need to cry that hard this evening. Just for the record.

BegoniaRex

My. Heart. I have never cried while reading any Webtoon ever, but oh, you got me crying. Poppy described my relationship with my ex to a t. You come out of a relationship like that not even knowing who you are anymore. Took me several years before I was ready to date again.

lilkingtrashmouth

WAIT WAIT AT THE END, WAS THE CLACK SOUND HIM BREAKING THE STRAWBERRY ON THE HAIR TIE?!

Dani

Tora found his new calm, it's no longer the bracelet and ring representing Joe but the hair tie representing Poppy. That hurt to read but it's going to be ok, he's only wanting to protect her. They need each other in so many different ways. This was beautiful, that hug was one of the things in this episode that took me out!!! So genuine and natural with one another!!! He clenched that hair tie so hard!!!🍓🍓🍓😭😭😭

rubia1213 .

😢😢😭😭😭😭😭😭

EmeryDiLoncrete

Lily I don't know if you realize the impact you have in our hearts with each episode. Joy, laughter, sadnesses, hope... all those mixed feelings, it's just beautiful. The character development is simply perfect. How we can empathize and identify with them it's truly the sacred goal of a master storyteller. ❤️

Andrea Chen

I’m.... in pieces, my heart is wrenched and my eyes are misty. Even though it’s heartbreaking, this episode is my new favorite because I think their mutual understanding of parting ways now speaks volumes about their care for one another and honestly, is so much more meaningful than if they had kissed instead. Now I'm REALLY praying to whatever cosmic energy that exists in the MPL world that Tora and Poppy are able to be together without any worries 😭because I don't think my heart could take it if they didn't...

VintageNerd

😢😢😢😭 My heart. 💔 This was soo sad, but beautiful at the same time. I feel sad for both Tora and Poppy. 😭😭

Marsprinz

Omg I Literally was expecting another kiss or something else! I started this episode with a whole heart and Finished with a bunch of pieces, but dang it was soooo gooodddd! Lily thank you for this amazing story and I can’t wait to see what’s comming! Now if you excused me, im gonna go to a corner and listen to sad songs for a while.

Latanga Gustave

😩 Lily who told you that you could make me cry huh who the HELL told you 😭 to do this to me

Tia

Thank you for blessing us with such a good episode, Lily💞 I hurt man, but the pain is perfect

Elena Shachneva

It’s so saaad😭😭😭 why I’m crying 😢

Alondra

Tora really needed that hug.. they both did. I really hope they can both find happiness with each other 😞

CoCoPuff_BB

For some reason this episode made me want to cry! So much angst! The fact that Poppy birthday was today and Tora didn't know but still took her out. I truly feel like it didn't have to b a good bye. We were making good progress with Tora heart... 😢😢😢 they can't say goodbye! But I am curious what the note say or was it just a blank airplane with his ring?

Amanda

I... I'm not ok 😭😭😭😭

Vanessa

I'm NOT crying, YOU are 😢😢😢

NurseAmethyst

I avoided reading this episode the longest I could. Only because I knew it was going to give me feels. Which it did. I felt Poppy’s confession regarding her relationship with Julri SO DAMN DEEP IN MY SOUL. Especially because my last relationship felt like that. It gets to a point where you know you want to stay, but can't decide why, and you give yourself so many 'reasons' thst you just confuse yourself... Everything in this episode was absolutely beautiful like always, but the thing that got me the most was Tora giving Poppy that ring and bracelet. It is a form is 'love' and 'respect' if you will, from him. Who had a ring and bracelet before? Joe. Alice’s son. The importance of Joe and Alice in Tora’s life is obviously big, and Alice is clearly one of those few people that Tora actually cares about. It was like an anchor reminding him why he did things, or to keep going. Now, he's got Poppy. Maybe Tora doesn't 'love' Poppy in a very sexual manner yet, but the emotional connection has been made, in him giving her a 'piece of himself' as well. I don't know if she knows what those items meant to him??? Likewise, Poppy with the cooking him meals is an expression of how she shows her affection... I dont usually get this mushy, but damn, this episode was just.... dammmmmmmmn good. Shoot. Im tearing up again... Thank you for the feels, Lily!!!! But I will now go cry it out in my room for a bit.😪😪😪 Like always ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ so amazing!

Christina

I’m so sad right now 😭😭😭

Natasha

I haven’t read any other comments yet, so I don’t know if anyone else has said something like this, but this episode really hurt to read. I associate giving away personal jewelry with suicide. I don’t think Tora is actually suicidal, but now my head is there and I’m re-playing another jewelry-giving situation over and over in my head and I want to curl up in a ball in a corner and cry.

romanycreams

My heart :'(((( I'm just hoping Quincy is the reason they're back in each others lives (like asap would be good). I wonder if we'll ever get to see the actual text Tora sent Pops... I remember in Ep 37 he was tapping on his phone but I just assumed it was to tell her when he'll pick her up :(:(:(:(:( Also, is there any particular significance to the paper plane? I don't remember it being used in the earlier eps but I could've forgotten. I wonder if he wrote a note to Pops

Abbiline

Happy birthday, Poppy. 🍰 😢

Gingerine Tangerine

Devastated. You laid out all the hints, I saw it coming but I was hoping for just a little more time. Poor things!

Tashi

Oh no...I cried so much. Even the 5th time I read it. 😭

Natalie Jo Bray

My heart....this week waiting for the next episode is going to be painfully long.

tambourina

Brb gonna go cry in the shower

ladyface

Lily WHAT. The light of his life went out and I’m not okay. How did you make it through this week 😭😭😭

Ms Millennial Pink

I have so much to talk about this episode ... But I'm currently overwhelmed with so many feelings so I'm just gonna focus in one aspect for now: The symbolism of Tora and Poppy hugging goodbyes at the edge of a cliff and Tora tying her up to keep her safe while he hangs on the edge of a big fall... That was moving and brilliant and a perfect visual metaphor to what they are currently about to experience.

Christina Agan

Guys, it was Valentines Day, her birthday. He knew that, he had to. Gyu had all her info. He GAVE her Joe’s ring and bracelet for safe keeping. I don’t know if that means he will come back for them, but I’m processing everything between crying and sobbing. I really am broken up over this. Damnit, this one was heavy. And he just hugged her. Crap, I am crying way too much.

caseyjarryn

I should have listened to you Lily, I was not in a private place and I was not OK! 😅

TeHeeJones

This panel just took me on a roller-coaster of emotions. I love their joy that they experience when they are with each other. Their connection is so simple and true. The way she could open up to Tora, and the way he wishes he could open up to her is beautiful in its own way. Heartbreaking finding out that out of all the people she knew she wanted to spend her birthday simply with Tora. Would he have been able to let her go if he had known? Their embrace was a sign of hope 💜. The fact that Tora left her with something that he holds close to him heart is comforting. His ring and bracelets obviously meant something to him and now Poppy should know that she means something to him too 💜. I wonder if the paper plane reminds her of the time she spent with her father... I hope what it says doesn't break her heart... This panel literally had me struggling to read it Lilydusk 💔

Kae

My mind is all over the place right now. Even though I KNOW they’ll end up together (they just have to 🥺), I’m devastated. I started screaming at my phone early on but seriously lost it when Tora hugged his Bobby ❤️ Even while comforting Poppy you could feel how desperately he needed that hug himself. How connected he felt to her pain of being trapped and doubting your own judgement/actions. He knows this is the end of their time together. He’s savoring this rare occasion of peaceful physical contact with someone that has become his new safe place. In his mind this night is the closest he’ll ever be to her and you can feel his heart breaking 😖

Becca Darnold

Oh hell no! I lost my breath with that damn bento box. And actually teared up. This story is soo not good for my heart one chapter...... then soo uplifting the next. Very few things can do thatvto me... and for that, I commend you Lily.

Sydney

I threw my phone down when they hugged and fought back tears when I saw his ring and bracelet. Lily you’ve made me a mess for these two amazing characters. What the fuck 😭🤧

Amy 💕

I loved this episode. The hug was very sweet and intimate 🥰

TMK

What are you doing to us?!

SamtheCEexplorer

He'll be back. He upgraded his ring and bracelet for a strawberry hairtie.

Sara Brown

Well now I'm ugly crying. This was such a beautiful and heart wrenching episode. Poppy, we have all been there girl with the douche bag of an ex that makes you feel less than. That part broke me because I was there at her age (I got a happily ever after, but it took some serious work on my end, with myself, and eventually with someone who was super patient who is now my husband lol) . Seriously I have all the feels for this episode, on so many levels.

KIMBERLY CRETIN

Lily, literally, I'm crying so hard, I don't know why, my heart is so broken for Tora, but also for Poppy it's her birthday ... OMG, I can't with such emotion, THANK YOU VERY MUCH! Her mom is perhaps alive! That's a lot of information. But I can't stop crying 😭, now I understand why you previously told us to look for a private space to read it, I love you, the best story, Wow, just WOW! ❤️ And the ring with the bracelet... Nooooooo I'm going to cry all the night today 😭😭😭😭😭

Schkaka

My heart hurts. I need a hug. I cant even right now 😭😭

ObstinateHeadstrongGirl

S’okay guys, he’ll be back. Pretty sure Poppy still has that notebook and she’s definitely going after Quincey boy for work.

Meghan Richardson

Omg, that frame of him seeing her and then her image disappearing....that got to me. This whole episode was...it’s just...with all the...ugh. You guys know what I mean, I have no words. Beautifully done Lily.

princesahyuuga

Dunno what to say. My heart is full of emotions. Great episode with beautiful metaphors. Terrific! 👏👏👏❤️😭

Sarrrruhh

I am literally addicted to the way you illustrate. I read a TON of manga but this has got to be one of the most capturing. Please make manga forever😩💕

LouCas27

OMFG - that was intense. 😳 I started tearing up when he hugged her, but totally lost it when I saw the trinkets he left for her (accidental birthday gift?), including the paper airplane that started it all. 😭😭😭 So, this is the third outcome, the inevitable he tried to delay, eh? 💔 I feel their interaction in this episode was far better than any make out session that we were hoping for this week. Methinks the depth of the dialogue shows how much they are connected on an emotional level. Tora doesn’t say much, but when he does, it’s a critical hit. And Poppy was brave enough to process a failed relationship, and no doubt she will come out stronger. Oh yeah, happy birthday little hamster! 🐹 Thanks to Lily for taking us on this wild journey. We still have many questions (where’s the notebook? Who is Tora really in the clan and the Shadow Division? Is Goliath still alive? Who will replace Trevor the sh*tty security guard? That Aniki’s seriously a gigolo?), but I am definitely pumped for the next episodes. I almost forgot that today non-FP fans will read EP #35, and I am genuinely excited for them 😘✌🏻🍓

Lee4992

Is it naive of me to hope he is embarking on a journey to free himself from the mob so he can come back to Poppy and live a life with her that won’t put her in danger. Maybe I’m way off base but it also kind of felt like a last supper situation and giving away maybe his most valued possessions like he is not expecting to be alive much longer, especially with the Poppy fading away panel.....or maybe Poppy is not alive. I know that’s crazy to say.....this episode is really throwing me for a loop and did not go as I anticipated. On a side note last week someone commented that they wondered if Tora would freak out if Poppy cried, and I knew he would know just what to do and how to handle Poppy with care and he did not disappoint. Ok, now I’m gettin flashbacks to Ulaan leaving Yuwa to fight and her getting a false report that he’s dead and Ulaan showing up months later to claim his woman. Tora is a warrior, he’s got to make it back claim Poppy! I want Tora to go back in Poppy’s building and have his night of passion before he goes off to war.

MollzJJ

*handing out tissues and free hugs* 😭 Need to just say that my first husband was a Julri x10 and the way Poppy describes the way your mind struggles with sorting out right and wrong and if this person is ok or not hit me so hard. I know I’m not alone in being with someone who blindfolds and spins you until you can’t tell which way you’re facing. Learning to trust your gut is the hardest thing to do when it comes to love. Poppy’s birthday cake made the super ugly cry come out 😭😭 and then it was a floodgate from there. I haven’t cried this hard with a fictional story since Jamie sent Claire back through the stones! Love you guys and Lily - we’ll get through it. ❤️

Chelsea Fleites

I started to cry lily why you do me like this my soul hurts 😭😭 poor baby tora he is mad deep in his feelings and him leaving something so poppy could remember him that just straight killed me ❤️❤️

Jamie Dubiak

"So you say it's your birthday... well it's my birthday too!" Happy Birthday to us, Pops - funny because we were speculating that Tora was the Cancer over on Web Toons, haha. I wonder if that ring is to remember him by, and maybe let others know to leave her alone. Is it just a paper plane? Got to be a note there... Thank you for all the feels, Lily! Just, all of it was wonderful!

Tiffanyyyyy B

Can we talk about how he left her with something so dear to his heart though? I mean that speaks volumes! It's like giving someone your dog tags or a police officer giving his badge charm. Its very special to them. I hope she wears it. 😢🤧

mabarigroomer88

I want something to be inside the paper plane so badly. I feel for these characters so much. I am so looking forward to the next episodes. These are keeping me going during my stressful life. I want to keep them safe from hurt but I know things will look up soon.

Ele_Smiles

Oh my God, this hug looks so sweet. It kind of squeezes my heart ❤️

Chloe Hopkins

Tora stole his car and his dick appointment lmaoooo

Izzy Meraz

Omfg I’m in tears 😭 like my heart strings were pulled

Alondra

Did he just break the strawberry hair tie as a symbol of him not seeing her anymore 🥺😩💔💔

AKstargazer

The new ring and black band for Tora is now her strawberry hair tie. Man... this is so heavy.

Darla (Tora’s THOT)

My chapter 39, my heart aches in multitudes. First off, fuck Julri always with his ungrateful ass… MOVING ON!!! What killed me this chapter was seeing Tora’s ring, bracelet, and paper plane (note) left in the bento… it made me think HE THINKS it may be his time… remember there’s a big clan war and he’s a heavy hitter… he can be taken down as well and that’s the last thing we want but it’s reality for him. One lucky mofo can easily take him down if they got him in the right spot. Not only that, the only memento he is keeping with him is the strawberry hair tie that poppy gave him. THATS his only link to any sort of loving relationship he has ever had. It hurts my heart so much. Poppy disappearing I’m his imagination- KILL ME THE FUCK NOW. anyway do I believe this is truly goodbye? OF COURSE NOT. they’re gonna be reacquainted when they don’t expect it, to whose the link? QUINCY OF COURSE. Anyway…. now I see where poppy gets her inner bad bitch from- she gets it from her mama…. she a BIIIIITTCCCHHHHHHHHHH (I know I’m judging by looks but I’m thinking that is a baddie way) my heart hurts. Think I need to eat to feel better bye

AndySaro

😭😭😭 was not expecting the heartbreake 😢😢💔💔💔🤧 Such a good story though, so engrossing. I just can't right know 🥺

Christina Agan

That HUG. That’s the sort of hug you give someone when they’re breaking apart and you’re trying to squeeze all the pieces back together. And somehow not only was that moment more impactful than the kiss for me......but it felt deeper, more meaningful. I can’t even begin to process all these really deep emotions that got yanked to the surface of my heart from reading this, but damn. I just really am swimming in them right now.

Asia

Def felt this. Pulled on my jeart strings you Scorpio lol the destruction and pain--then the success. He truly was saying good-bye. Very heartfelt; deep like a Scorpio would lol I can't wait till they meet again.

Victoria Dias

vick cannot think. she broke down. that’s me. bye

Amy Chab

They had their last night together on her birthday. I literally paused and said no when she brought up the text. I can't, they just got so close in the last few episodes 😭

Enginerd

Okay. Now that I’m done bawling my eyes out, I have a theory... Poppy still has to run into Quincey. Maybe he is looking for some fresh ideas as asks for input from Poppy. She recalls this evening and tell him this all-the-feels story. Tora is then with Quincey as he’s reviewing his tailored story and Tora of course isn’t really paying attention until the story sounds oddly familiar and asks where he got the idea. And boom! Poppy is back in the picture. If that’s not a sign of fate, I don’t know what is XD

Nordorr

I have been waiting for Tora to give/accept a meaningful hug with Poppy since episode 27, but not like this 😭. My husband had surgery this week and I thought I was all out of tears, I guess I was wrong. We need Poppy to connect with Quincey stat so that Tora and her are thrown back into each other's orbits.

PotatoRunner

I'm out right now, it's day where I'm at, as soon as I read up to the possible goodbye, my heart sank, absolutely dropped. I can't read this till I go home, I'm not ready to read this in public 😭

Alyssa McClain

I’m not crying, you’re crying!! Okay, yeah I’m crying because this episode hit me hard 😭😭🥺🥺

TMK

Wait, why did someone say something about August? Did I miss something?

mapahuit

I can't write everything this episode made me feel, I'm crying so hard. Everything was so heartbreaking and I hate goodbyes, but looking at it in a really cold and analytical way I'm so happy Tora had the emotional and affective responsibility towards Poppy and that, my friends, is the purest form of love. My love and admiration for Tora just grows and grows every Friday, but it's not compared to the admiration and gratefulness I feel towards you, Lily. Oh, I don't leave Poppy behind, I wish I could haver her emotional intelligence towards everything, she's just the best. And there's a lot of information I can't process because this episode was really hard for me, but one of the most beautiful so far (imo) PS Everyone here is really beautiful and even if it is hard, never let anyone tell you or make you feel like you're not enough 'cause, hell you are. And you deserve someone that appreciates you just for breathing, you deserve to be treated well, to be respected, to be heard and to be loved.

stargazing

*rocks back and forth holding her knees in the fetal position, weeping softly*

Wild Poppies

* Deep Shuddering Breath* I'm so sad right now. I was not expecting them to say goodbye. Even if it's only temporarily, it hurt my heart something fierce. Especially the ending when Poppy sees his personal items and has big tears and Tora sees her image disappear and looks devastated. 🥺😢😭💔 Lily, you are a magical storyteller. I'm so invested in these 2 characters that I cried real tears!

Mizu

I know the summary for it has been edited so that might just mean the plot direction has changed altogether, but does anyone else think this is where Poppy's interest in Quincey/the possible love triangle begins to develop? It would make sense, like other comments have surmised, that Poppy would meet up with Quincey again because of work and her promise to look for him for Mr. Lam. I'm so curious how the direction of the plot is going to go, and while I'll definitely miss the Poppy x Tora moments, I'm also excited to see how the other relationships in this story develop and to learn more about the other side of Tora's life. This was a fantastic chapter, by the way💕 The execution and pacing was phenomenal and I appreciate the themes and emotions assessed in the story, as always. Wonderful work as always, Lily❤

Linkan

I got teary eyed knowing it’s Poppy’s birthday and I’m so happy she got to spend her special day with Tora even though it might be the last time 😭😭😭😭 But Tora giving her his ring & a paper plane and Poppy gave him her strawberry hairtie got me thinking that they will be seeing each other a lot more 👀

WilderNESS

1. First of all *starts playing My Chemical Romance’s “I’m not okay” in the background full blast* my eyes are fogging and my snot is choking me. 2. LORDTTTT the details. LILY YOUR DETAILS. Idk why the simple act of him holding her shoes had me #REKT but it did. 3. You know, the first time I heard of gaslighting was not too long ago and it made me stop and think about all the times in my life where that has happened to be but i wasn’t aware that this was happening to me so thank you for addressing these kinds of complicated feelings in MPL because I am gaining self awareness and emotional intelligence just from relating to the realness here. *sobs in gratitude*. Also: I would like to say that I also LOVE how emotionally intelligent Tora is. 4. Okay so as a long time reader of romance novels I used to not get it when the women would say something like *swoon* this man play my emotions like a violin. WELL LET ME TELL YOU... Lily... WHY Y U PLAY MY EMOTIONS LIKE A VOILIN? I’m over here fox-and-the-hound sobbing and then he goes off and is like TEE HEE and I’m over here hiccuping in snot TEE HEE-ing at their light banter while blinded by my own salty tears. 5. He thanked her.... *geyser levels of sobbing* 6. Beyoncé once said: “if you liked it you shoulda put a ring on it” AND HE SORTA PUT A RING ON IT?!?! *hoover dam levels of tears break* brb guys...

Shara Jan-Burl

I've read this 3x in an hr and all I can say is...I love how their both trying to protect each other in their own ways. Their not a "couple" but the feelings are deeper than a lot of relationships I've seen. I'm also dying of curiosity of where her shoes went. He WAS holding them (hes so sweet) and then they poofed...odd thing but that's where my exhausted mind went.

Alexandria Murillo

LILY! What are you doing to me 😭💔 I love Tora so much 😔 I really hope in the end they do end up together. But it’s hella risky if they do.... that kind of lifestyle is hard. My dad was in it and it was really hard for my mom. My mom had to leave cuz she didn’t want to put my brother and me at risk. So I totally feel this episode on so many levels. Thank you for being an amazing story teller.

Kat

So are they going to be apart for a while now? :(

Hannah Aureum

Oops! My heart went *splat*. It’s dead. This was my first week on Patreon and fast pass and BOY I COULD NOT HAVE JOINED AT A BETTER TIME. My heart is ACHING. I want to give tora the BIGGEST hug (thank u, Poppy, for covering that for me). I’m totally obsessed with these two and can’t wait to see what comes next 🥺🥺🥺 ah fuck. I’m going to sob when we get to read the note huh?

Julia G

I am in tears, my heart hurts in so many ways for them. The song made this episode a thousand times sadder. 😭😭😭 It’s like he’s testing to see how she’ll handle it when he ghosts on her 😢 but like like how, even though he’s not “keen on hearin about him” he’s giving Poppy a chance to talk and vent about it. Julie is a piece of shit and I want Tora to punch him. Originally, I was team just glare and scare but now I want Tora to hit him and say “That’s for Poppylan.” and then just walk away. I’ve been where she was, the second guessing and replaying things trying to sift through the manipulation. Feeling like you can’t trust your own mind, it is exhausting like she said and I’m so glad she found this opportunity to get away from Julri because when you’re in that situation, it is so hard to know if what you’re thinking is true, if leaving is what you need to do. It’s so hard to read of Poppy going through that, no one deserves it. Guys! I found Poppy’s shoes 🤗 Tora relating to what she said and his encouragement not to blame herself. I feel like that something he needs to do for himself as well. Not blame all the bad things he’s done to survive on himself. He was dragged into this life and survival or death were his only options and that’s not his fault. Poppy saying she knows it was the right decision and she can breathe again...Tora’s expression says to me “If she can be okay after all that, she’ll be okay when I’m gone.” And that breaks my heart. It’s like her words were unknowingly encouraging his decision to leave her. Poppy gets away with being an asshole because she’s small about as much as Tora gets away with being an asshole because he’s intimidating 🤣 What goodbye text?! Lillydusk!!! Why u no show us?! 😓 So Tora stole Aniki’s blue car 🤔 the fact that he left that money really speaks to Tora’s character. He does what he has to but he also tries to make it right as well. This “new project” must be Vincent’s plan to pull Tora back into the clan. The fact that he says he won’t be coming around anymore rather than often or anytime soon makes my heart squeeze, he’s so sure he won’t see her again...ever 😢 When he asked if she was relieved he wasn’t coming around and she didn’t say no, I wanted her to tell him she would miss him or something but she didn’t. She brought up the thug stuff again and that hopeful look on his face just vanished and he dropped his arm. Without words, she confirmed his belief that she’s actually relieved he would come around anymore. Whether she’s actually relieved or not, we don’t know but he definitely thinks she is. Poppy tried to use humor to lighten the mood and it backfired on her, sent her down a rabbit hole of Julri’s manipulative bullshit. I hate that he’s made such a strong impression that she doubts she’s even pretty. 😤 dirtbag! Poppy is crying, partly because of the memories of Julri’s words but also because she’s realizing that this is the end of her time with Tora. Though she didn’t deny Tora’s “joke” about her relief, just like on the roof, she’s sad at the idea of Tora not being around. *insert Quincey* “Why is Tora hugging you like his life depends on it?” I felt that hug right in the feels because it’s a goodbye hug. Tora is so careful about touching her but he’s holding on to her like a lifeline, a lifeline he’s about to cut loose. Him saying thank you at the wrong time and her gently correcting him was so cute. And the laugh, he’s had so little experience with laughter that his laugh sounds like a car trying to start. The sensation is so foreign to his body that it’s stuttering trying to do it 😭 It’s Poppy’s birthday!!!! And she spent it with Tora 🤗 awe! Lillydusk, was that supposed to say “I asked him out on a date”?! Was it a date?! That’s so unfair, their first and last official date 😭 *stomps feet like angry toddler* no fair!!! He left her the ring and the bracelets, his most prized possessions, his moral compass, his reminder of his worth and humanity, his connection to Joe and Alice that he carried with him wherever he went and he replaced them with the strawberry hair tie 😫😭 and then she faded away while he held the hair tie in his fist *ugly cries* my heart is in pieces!!! 💔 I don’t want “the third option”!!! 😩 take it back!!! I NEED TO KNOW WHAT WAS IN THE AIRPLANE NOTE!!! I need it like I’ve never needed anything else in my life 😱 the connection to their first meeting was so beautiful and I hate how much it feels like an ending. I know the story isn’t over but it sucks knowing we’re going to have to wait a pretty long time to see them together again...unless she does start working with Quincey soon, then there’s a little hope. And would that just throw a wrench in Tora’s get out of her life plan 🤨 crossing fingers and praying to the MLP Goddess (Lillydusk)

Maudie

Poppy is now in possession of Tora's ring, bracelet, a paper plane/ possible mysterious note, AS WELL AS HIS JACKET !! 🤯

Christina Agan

I am praying with all my heart and soul that the paper airplane is a note for her that will take some of this sting away.

Christina Agan

Also, she still has his hoodie and I hope she starts wearing it. Seriously, I would love to see her wearing his hoodie just because it makes her happy.

Blueberry

Was not emotionally prepared for that. And being on my period dose not help . 😢😢

Allison

I AM LITERALLY CRYING.

Sandy Attaalla

This episode seriously made me so sad. 😭🥺😞 But, I know it’s not the end for these two, and that’s what’s keeping me going. 😯💪🏽😊

princesahyuuga

What If it is written on the note: Happy Birthday? 🥺

Cleide Sousa

Ahh, this episode was so meaniful (all this goodbye arch), but so sad... Oh God!

Tanya Sabo

I’m ugly crying. 💔😭💔😭

AKstargazer

Also... Poppy Happy Birthday love <3

Vita

Omg, Tora knew it was her birthday!!!! With the extensive background check Gyu did, that knowledge is definitely within his reach. I am SOOO sure that part of the note will be wishing her Happy Birthday. And that just means more tears from me 🥺

Noey Kamaril

Hai everyone, im new to Lily patreon. But been her fans since MPL 2.0 launch. I havent come across wholesome story that give reality approach to the plot, and here we are now. So sorry if im rambling & all over the place to put my thoughts. After binge Lily art, canon & non-canon, posting after posting. I realised why the story been sitting on her laps for so long, it been waiting a revival from reality stand point. Beside the art cant lied, even my hubby ads exec whom dabble in illustrating & manual drawing said your art Lily really on point! Love-drama-violence/abused reality plot doesnt come with easy journey, that’s why Lily story soo relatable. I feel the pain for introvert nature person want to feel love and disappointing when open-up. Maybe PoppyxTora will be together & coming stronger than ‘mafia/yakuza/triad’ life that need to be kept hidden. But now they both put in a place where options are limited and consequences are mounting. I put ‘Crying Free Man’ & Mcmafia references, Tora want Poppy save from anything he do & done. Fak i just realised Lily’s SG#77 image, its filling the dots where they are when could meet again in different circumstances, its intimate but both crying. I cant imagine two people that gradually love & well matched have to waiving ‘sayonara’, hug for the last time 💔 joking to comfort each other without knowing what the future hold. I feel like they being robbed for hope. How do you cope from it? You cant just forget, you took momentos: ring, bracelet & 🍓hairtie. Now Poppy’s anchor is Tora and poor damage Tora hold-on to hairtie to keep himself sane: there something good to live for. Really am so sorry to ramble, im hugging myself now for not sad. Because PoppyxTora story are relatable for me & hubby, we both coming out from very abusive long term relationship, with our exes. *ghost hug* for lovely & lively Lily’s patrons, brace ourself for Hi-Res artwork, i might start to weep again

Katie

My heart was already fragile today and this had me rolling with all the feels 😭 So beautiful, so sad, so sweet 💖 That's all I have for now. Beautiful 💜

kluebcke

Oh, wow, that was painful to read, even just the first time. Exchanging the momentos of the person who tried to teach him how to be a human being for the momentos of the person who is teaching him how to reach out in a positive, emotional way. Even with the teeniest bits of affection, maybe. And as hard as all that was to read, there seems to be a lot of story to go and the rest of Chekov's gun to reckon with regarding the clan war. *trying to avoid playing Troy and leap to conclusions in a single bound* (And I still can't shake the question of whether the notebook is a MacGuffin.)

Julia G

I think this “new project” is extremely dangerous and Tora doesn’t expect to survive. I think he chose to cut ties with Poppy now, before she got too attached to him, so it wouldn’t hurt her as much when he dies. While I know the ring as bracelets are Joe’s or a tangible reminder of Joe, whom we know was influential in Tora’s life, it’s not just a reminded of Joe’s life. It’s also a reminder of the loss of Joe. Like Tora wears them as a homage to Joe after his passing, I imagine Tora gives the ring and bracelets to Poppy so that she has that tangible reminder of him when Tora is gone from her life. Making the giving of those items both a passing of a meaningful possession to someone who matters to him and also a possible omen that Tora will suffer a similar fate as the previous owner and is passing the token on like Joe possibly did.

Kazu Hana

This episode really full emotion and heart felt😭 criess arghh and that hug is soo sweet 😭😭 made me want to hugs everyone too TT 💦 thanks Lily for this sweet yet emotional episode cries sobs hard 😭 💓🥺💓

Christine

I’m so heartbroken I can’t even form words! 😭

April Rainey

If I was Poppy I would wash his hoodie because who knows how long they’ll be apart 😭💔

?? Shortie ??

This episode genuinely made me cry my eyes out.. it really did and it’s seriously hard to do that. This webtoon is full of emotions that make me sympathize with these two amazing characters. Lily dusk has not failed to impress me with her work and I can’t wait for the next episode! While I know this isn’t quite the end, I do know it had to happen. I’m sure however that their paths will eventually gross again. But deep down in my soul I want to him to climb that balcony, knock on her window, she opens it saying “I thought you said you couldn’t scale buildings” and they kiss and stuff 🥺😭 and I just remembered that he still has that motion sensor in the tree that’s in front of her apartment sooooooo :0 In total, I love this webtoon with all my heart and I’m very excited about what comes next. I’m ready and waiting for them to be in each other’s lives! I can’t type forever because I’m bouta cry again but that’s all I had to say! Amazing work Lilydusk! You’re an amazing author and artist!! 💕💕

JL

just as a FYI, i'm still reading this chapter but noticed that there's I believe, an accidental duplicate in dialogue in the panel where Poppy says "narin city's a pretty incredible place, i should bring up my easel one day", like it says it twice This chapter was bitter sweet :( The story, characters and art is phenomenal - MPL is the reason why I started reading webtoons. Need to know what's inside that paper plane omg

Callie Adkins

Ugh. Send help, I am NOT okay 🥺

Didier Arias

Im new here and aaaaaaaah this is my first post😻 i love hugs!!!! I love both Tora and Poppy!! and also, Tora loves getting inked!

Susie Marie

I bet that paper plane becomes her most cherished birthday present even though he doesn't know her birthday... or does he?

Gracie Bou

This episode was so wonderful. I love that it’s not just like drama for the sake of drama. Not being together is the most responsible choice. But damn my heart. I’m glad they have a foundation now though, because I get the feeling fate is gonna throw a lot at them

Kelly Gutierrez

First post ever, I read the chapter an hour and 45 minutes ago.... I am still crying, my boyfriend ran to get me food to try to cheer me up.... I can’t.... so heartbroken..... Beautiful story Lily... just beautiful

Julia G

Lillydusk, was that Tora’s hoodie in the clothes hamper?! 😢 can we see Poppy wear it with the ring and bracelets? PLEASE 😢😓

Asteroid

This is not what I expected when Lily said find a quiet place... did lily know we would be crying like this?! Lily do you get pleasure from this?!?! Lol This was just so heart wrenching!!!!! Just knowing how much the ring and bracelet must have meant for Tora and him giving them both to Poppy as a GOODBYE GIFT?! PLUS THE PAPER AIRPLANE!!!!!!! signifying their first encounter!!!!!! Bruh 😭 mi corazoncito 💔 that means Poppy must really REALLY mean a lot to him, even though they met not that long ago and they barely got the chance to spend time together they’ve impacted each other so much, I guess it wasn’t about how much time they spent together but instead how special and memorable those little moments were for each other. It feels like we’re about to start a new chapter and I’m excited! But honestly a little scared for Tora especially on his “new project”. I hope he won’t stay away from Poppy for too long... :’) also what did he text that made poppy think this was their goodbye? Did I miss something?! (Gotta go read and be sad again) Also as always!!!! this was just beautiful! Song recommendations: “Adore you” by Harry styles I feel like the lyrics represent Tora’s POV regarding Poppy at this point. “I'd walk through fire for you Just let me adore you Like it's the only thing I'll ever do” 👀😩 “Flower” by Ikon It’s in Korean but hear me out!!! The lyrics!!!! Poppy is literally Tora’s flower, a flower he had to let go of... “I hope the departing path brings no pain I hope you continue smiling happily I hope you never return to me even in my dreams... ”bruhhh And then “I went crazy over the thought of never being able to see you again, so I tried to hold on for a short while… because I couldn’t forget you walking away with a smile... “ this is literally their last scene together! Tora hugging Poppy and Him remembering her smile at the end. 😭😭 Okay that’s all; peace out! ✌️Adios, hasta luego!!! ❤️❤️

Nordorr

Ok, ok but, Gyu is going to show up as a security guard at Poppy's apartment, right? She doesn't know that he and Tora are friends. Between Gyu and Quincey he can still keep tabs on her until he can't stay away anymore. :: Cries in grasping at straws::

RpG

Shes so little in his arms 🥺

EmeryDiLoncrete

The thought that the note on the paper plane could be Happy Birthday Bobby it's just... it's just....holy fuck I can't even find the words to describe all these feelings 💔

Rachel B.

I had so much to say but, the moment they hugged I just cried. Damn... That cannot be all. I felt Poppy's esteem issue on a personal level; I too have been in that kind of turmoil. His ring folded into the paper airplane.. The way he saw her fade away.. damn, damn, damn!!! That is all, I'm going to compose myself by a box of tissues.

TicklemeAli

I will come back with a more witty comment, but... for now. I think I need a moment to mourn the fact that two of my best friends, that I shipped from the beginning because they’re perfect for each other, just had a very mature and amicable breakup, because the time isn’t right. And nothing is right. And I selfishly hate their selflessness. And I’m heartbroken, because I want them together. I... it’s too real and too raw. I need a moment

andrea

Dammit Lily! Why you gotta play with our emotions like dat? It's like ... I can't .. I don't even know what .... 🥺🥺🥺 You're the only Webtoons author that make me happy and sad and confused and heartbroken all at the same time. WHY though?! 😭😭

Kathleen West

I cried!!! Is it next week yet? 😭

ObstinateHeadstrongGirl

Ok yes all the feels but why did Tora jack that car?? 🚙 Where was his??

SerpentinaShana

Tora is giving her his prized possessions, and using HER now (her strawberry) as a grounding anchor. And he’s ok with walking away... letting her find someone else, have a happy life, have a family—whatever— because he doesn’t want her to be subjected to him, and his life. And I was taught that when someone gives your their important possessions... sometimes, they are assuming their life might be coming to an end, as it’s a signal to watch out for in suicide prevention. I hope that’s not the case here... but you never know what can happen in the mafia, especially with how he recently handled Vincent’s wishes... Regular readers : THEY KISSED! Fast Passers: *get their hearts ripped out of their chests*

Bukgirl

A couple of thoughts: 1. Poppy isn't going to let Tora go. She is very much a go-getter, she proved that with Mr. Lam. Pretty sure she is going to go after him. 2. Tora is going to need her, even if he is trying to protect her. Plus, he is going to want to make sure she is okay. 3. Quincy is going to play matchmaker. Not quite sure how, but making Tora squire to get back at him and to help him find some joy. It seems up his alley.

Erica Vanesa

It’s been like 2 hours and I’m still emotional lol...but omg I will be ugly crying again next week if that note says Happy Birthday...and I’m with all of you who say he definitely knew it was her birthday considering he did that extensive background check on her. What if that’s why he got her that muffin the day before 🥺🧁

Ruth

Just read the fast pass 😭 somehow i feel like image in SG #77 will occur in future when he's coming back to her.. so emotional

Susanna Nguy

Unrelated to the discussion, but are we supposed to be able to see the fast pass chapters? I thought the patreon would bypass the need for me to also pay 5 coins for each chapter, but I am still required to pay it.

Sabrina

Them shorts yass!!!

Nikole

This episode TORA me up. 😭 Yes, I’m the dork that posted that comment on Webtoon 🤣 Seriously though, this is one of the best stories I have ever read. Beautifully talented, Lilydusk!

Asteroid

Are we gonna get a time skip!?!!? 👀 It seems like they’re both going on their own separate ways, at least for a little while since they both have things they need to take care of regarding work 😔

Depressed_Ghostii

Omg this episode was emotional. How dare webtoon tell me this was the episode I have finally been waiting for with kissy faces and hearts only to them make me tear up and wrench my heart out. I am way to emotionally Invested. X

YukinaSuzumori

Im still emotional. 😭 Does Tora know that it's her bday? I'm guessing he does because he probably invested her. Hence, the ring was a birthday and a goodbye gift. 😭😭😭 And now I'm crying even more.

Christina Agan

So.....has anyone else been reduced to a shattered, aimless soul, staring at the broken, dry and crumbling remains of your former physical self that was left behind as your essence tried to shuffle off that mortal coil in a vain attempt to escape that blinding pain that enveloped your entire being when Tora watched Poppy fade from his vision? Just me?

Ms Millennial Pink

ugly_crying.rar Gotta reread everything again to try to unzip more than just all these feels

Blueberry

It took me a second read to understand his “I had rougher things” comment. It made me laugh through the tears. Then I got to the bento box and cried some more.

Soosie

Happy birthday Poppy 🍰💖 So happy she got to express herself and lift some heavy thoughts off her chest, and that a hunk of a man was there on her birthday to affirm her and restore back the self-esteem that her ex slowly peeled away.... "So I hope you're not blamin' yourself...*Grip*..." 😭 Maybe he secretly knew it was Poppy's birthday though? I don't know the exact story behind the bracelet and ring yet, or how much it meant to Tora, but it must've meant a lot to him... Seeing Joe wear it, then Tora...now it's passed onto Poppy. Part of me hopes this isn't goodbye forever, and part of me is still hanging on to the words from episode 1, "...but when you look back at your life...you'll see that the dots are all connected" 💖🙏🏻 I love that panel where Poppy said she should bring her easel up to Regina's Peak one day while Tora was holding her shoes as she was so freely swinging her arms and legs 😩🌺 Shout out to gigolo Aniki from AU! 😆 Escort life can't escape him hehe Can't wait to see if there's a note in the airplane! ✈️ I wonder if the airplane symbolizes something...that their 'goodbye' moment is going to fly them to the next stop where they'll meet again, perhaps?  Tora is such a gentleman and sweetheart.... I can feel the warmth in the hug they shared. My heart is hurt yet so full at the same time.. "shut up and hug me back" hehe I love them so much...💖

Rosemary Hunt

This was just gut wrenching... but it can't be all for them?!?! It can't be?! I would be so upset... just awe of the emotion this Webtoon stirs in me... can't wait but also all the little cross overs!!! You have to pay attention to everything!!!

Kassandra Nichole

So, I'm wondering if her mother is involved in the underworld, given her expression int he photo, her unknown whereabouts, and that Poppy's father had her learn how to box.

Asma Alshamsi

The epsiode made me so sad.. that ring and string and letter 😭😭😭😭😭😭

noonanoonayay

Where are my easy criers that cry at the drop of a hat just like Poppy?? You know, the criers who start crying as soon as they get into a mildly heated argument or hear any form of criticism 😆😂😭 Jokes aside, my heart goes to Poppy. She tries so hard not to be a burden to Tora or to anyone. Those words from her ex that crept into her mind left a great sting. It was so warming to see Tora gave her the biggest of bear hugs and words of confidence she needed to hear for herself. I don't know how soon we will see these two cross paths again but I can only hope it's sooner than we expect. You've created such a lovable and likeable couple that is more than just stuttered awkwardness filled with miscommunication, but rather being comfortable in each other's space. I'm really excited to see the fantasy aspect of this world and what you will unveil to us, Lily-san. Thank you for yet another wonderful chapter ❤️❤️❤️ Also shout-out to Aniki who always ends up getting the shit end of the stick for the sake of our entertainment 😂

Nana6781

This was so sad!😭 This episode got me so down.

PleasantPeasant

Not sure if the sound I heard was from my heart dropping to my stomach, or the tweens lighting fireworks in the street. Literally lurched at bento box image. 😬😥😳

vana

i can't wait until they find their way back to each other.

nativa

I'm literally like so excited for anything you put out there involving these two. Now honestly, when you go an pull on my heart strings like that and take my soul on an emotional helicopter ride all for the (Greater Good) I'm chilling as long as we can still *spill the tea* and have popcorn during those entertaining moments s'all good. I'm not going to even be sad, even though you throwing these tissue balls at me and I brought some tear repellent along the way for this emotional coaster! I.E -I'm not crying, you are.- However, Ms.lily you never cease to amazing me with you amazing story, can just tell you making every penny worth it, I can see how much emotional background and foreshadowing you put into this chapter and all in all it had your girl tossing and turning in bed like I was having a nightmare, trying to KEEP THE FEELS ALL BOTTLED UP INSIDE! 😖 Anyways, I hope all is well for you, and take your time gathering all the precious memories back, it must have been tons for you tonight EP ! You did wonderfull, wish I could throw a bit extra on your book. Thawadah 😊

Christine Lopez

The song that started playing in my head was movie by Tom misch. It made me so sad reading this gahhhhh

WilderNESS

I went back and reread it 4 hours later than the first time when I was uncontrollably sobbing and now...I’m like... I wonder what she wished for her bday since seemed to be wishing for something silently before she blew out her candle 🥺❤️

mluchsin

Ok, so, I definitely need to catch up on everyone’s comments, but before I do, I really want to share how much this chapter means to me. I recently (as in, he moved out less than two months ago) got out of what could be described as a toxic relationship at its best and an abusive one at its worst. I was with this man for 4 years, and we lived together for 3. This chapter means SO much to me, because the conversation Poppy and Tora have about Julri is just so SPOT ON. It’s so easy to look at a toxic situation and say “I’d never put up with that shit,” but the toxic person in your life isn’t just toxic all at once. It starts so small. They step just a hair over your boundary line, and it seems so small at first that you just move the boundary to meet their overstep. And you go through YEARS of that kind of manipulation, and suddenly you don’t even have a boundary. You don’t remember where it was, what it was, or even what’s right and wrong anymore — and all the while that person manipulates you and convinces you that you’re the crazy one, and you bend over backwards to keep them happy. I spent years thinking I was unlovable. My ex had me so convinced of it, I believed even my parents were disappointed in me. At one point, I was almost suicidal. He had me so down in the dumps, I didn’t even leave him after he cheated — it had to escalate to physical abuse before I broke it off. Almost no one in my life knows, because to everyone else I’m so fiercely independent. Everyone thought I was the one who “wore the pants” (I hate that phrase) because it was obvious I had become his caretaker, and he had all of our mutual friends convinced through subtle manipulations that I was controlling. He even had me convinced that I WAS controlling, even though privately I never once told him he could or could not do something — I only made requests out of self preservation. When Poppy says “It was like my sense of ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ had become so distorted, I could no longer tell which was which,” I FELT that in my heart of hearts. And it WAS exhausting. Since he left, I DO feel like I can finally breathe again. I love this for Poppy as our heroine, because I’ve felt what she’s going through — my own self confidence shot through the roof when I finally left that relationship, and the truth was, I had been mourning the loss of that relationship long before it was over. I also love this for Poppy and Tora as a couple, because when you’ve been with someone who treats you like that, it’s so hard to find a new partner that understands the way Tora does. Obviously, Tora had things a lot worse in his childhood, but I feel like for Poppy, Tora’s understanding saves her from a whole other world of hurt, because she never has to face some other dickwad trying to justify her ex’s actions or telling her she should have packed up sooner. And for Tora — I feel like he feels seen by Poppy probably in a way he never has with anyone before. Even though he hasn’t shared what he’s been through, he knows that on some level, she understands him. Add the fact that he’s probably never had an open discussion about any of this with anyone, and he’s never heard how it has impacted someone else, he’s probably feeling some type of way right now.

NEETU KAHLON

I had a hunch that this was coming... I can feel Tora... if he continues with Bobby, it’s inevitable that she’ll get dragged in his thug life... and even Tora doesn’t like it... it’s NOT his choice... and it’s only fair... it’s only love, to protect her from that life. Some always have it tough! ... I had a hunch this was coming.... nonetheless, it hurts the same... perhaps also because it was beautiful along the way... thank god! This is written by a human, and not fate...so they’ll meet again... and I’ll wait for that...after all that’s why I live some through these stories... they fill the holes :) PS: ‘Happy Birthday sweetheart’ on the paper plane?

Alex Smith

Little heart breaking this week

Darla (Tora’s THOT)

Ok I read it finally in complete solitary and definitely shed tears. It takes time for to me read/feel what they are saying in relation to looking at the imagery. First- it took me back to the painful memories of being with someone that IS COMPLETELY WRONG/TOXIC for you yet you don’t know how to leave them and try your best to turn them off so they break up with you but it’s simply not happening so you continue to take all their insults on your appearance and being called out of your name. Thankfully my RL bae would never do that to me and always makes me feel like I am beautiful even though I still question the validity. I shed tears when poppy said, “it was nice to meet you...” I felt that in my soul. I pictured how it would be if I had to say goodbye to my RL bae knowing our undeniable connection, it would break me. I would drown in my sorrows. And of course cried at bento box. The reasons he left them are endless but damn I’d cherish them with my life and wear them everywhere and kiss it every day in hopes of his safe return. Crying still can’t help it

Chapis1990

Did he snap the strawberry headband in his pocket at the end. Was that a symbol of Tora letting go of Bobby? Did anyone else see it? Was it just me overthinking things? ( I feel I’m so late to this discussion and missed my chance for an answer) 💔

Megatron

I absolutely loved this episode. I felt like crying, I guess because it made me remember the younger me and certain situations we were in. (I'll never forget you...❤ Thanks for the memories)

Amyzades

Hi, author! I'm curious: when you thought of Tora... Do you imagined some real person? I mean, some celebrity, or something like that? If yes, who this person would be? If we're making a movie out of this story, who do you think could be him? And ANOTHER thing: how old are Tora and Poppy? Approximately? I'm curious about these little things...

Lilz

I just reread it and I'm pretty sure he's keeping her strawberry hair tie in his pocket now and is gripping it at the end and my heart just can't. I also cried again when she blows out her birthday candles because I have spent too many birthdays blowing out candles alone too.

Life is beautiful

My Damn Spotify decided to play "Right here Waiting" by Richard Marx while I read this episode.. I have cried soo much.. I felt my heart break... THIS CAN'T BE THEIR END!!.. She can't end up with Quincy... No!!!

Chapis1990

They have to meet again when Bobby starts working with Quincey. We have to believe that 💔

LouCas27

It seems a lot is riding on Quincey’s back to help these two to reconnect soon somehow. Am sure he’ll do it, with or without pants 😜👖 Though is it correct to say that Poppy has not (yet) figured out that Quincey and QB Noyouko are the same person?

Soulchan91

I am overwhelmed with infinite sadness .. the tears flow all by themselves..And do not stop..ok I had a hardweek but there,....😭 😭 😭 😭 when she remembers the way she felt trapped in her relationship with her ex, is exactly, what I went through what i felt with my narcissistic pervert toxic fu%@ing Ex.. Pffffffffff, i can't really thinking of this goodbye between them right now, & that the anniversary was celebrated alone. it's too much...

Alexandria Murillo

Who else went back to re-read the story? Damn. I’m just like fml.

Frosina❄️

My tears won’t stop (;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`) the more i read the discussions the more i’m crying. (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞

EyeCan02

This chapter really broke my heart. I just kind of felt numb after I finished reading it. :/ Got my hopes up thinking they would kiss/ask each other to go steady in this chapter. I know why Tora had to do it but still. His pain was my pain in the last few panels. ;__;

Nanie

Cuties 💕☺️

Liga Z

Its fine. Im fine. We are all fine. It will be fine. Did I say we are Fine Yet??? *sobs in denial*

Audrey Mathieu

First time a webtoon made me burst into tears. so it's my first comment too. thank you for this. the toxic relationship hit me so hard. and then this hug... and the necklace and ring :( tora in the dark again.

larosamorada

Y'all. Sad Panda Provisions were not enough- my heart was so unprepared for all of this (though kudos to the hubs for getting me ice cream! 🍨🍨). I'm not shitting you when I say I haven't cried this much for a piece of fiction since the series finale of Six Feet Under. My heart will just never be the same after this. 💔💔💔 I'm fairly certain I just went through all 5 stages of grief at one time. Okay, time to dive in… Cheating EX boyfriend...way to know your worth honey boo! 👏👏👏 I think maybe some of that wisdom from Alice really sunk in. When Poppy called Julri her ex, I immediately pictured Alice saying "No self-respecting lady chases after a man." Especially a cheating man. Good riddance to bad rubbish. 🗑️🗑️Wise grannies for the win! I am low key hoping those two women meet someday and cackle over Poppy and Tora (denial stage here 🤣).  Ladies, I want you to pay very close attention to what Tora does next, because this is hands down the BEST example of healthy relationship dialogue and being a supportive partner. I love the way Tora helps Poppy put into words how she might be feeling, and most importantly, phrases it as a question. "Are ya sad?" So simple and yet it truly opens a space for Poppy to feel what she needs to, without having words put in her mouth. Equally important is Tora acknowledging how he feels about the conversation...and still says "but if you need to rant." Too many times, I see partners where the conversation stops at discomfort- the lines of communication close down. Tora doesn't do this here- he leans into his discomfort and receives Poppy's answer with open arms. Arms quite literally wrapped around her. 💔💔😭😭 Poppy, GIRL. Thank fuck you didn't think for a minute that Julri treated you right. But oh that stuck feeling, that moment of indecision. Again I see this a lot- one partner putting in all the work in hopes that things will get better. OOF, that line "Or even if I should have left." That is the siren song of abandonment...being unhappy in a relationship, but not ready to leave it because the idea of being alone is too awful/depressing. Why do I feel like this has a LOT to do with her mom (more on that later)? And of course, the death of her father; that had to be a void she needed to fill. I still feel like Poppy settled for Julri because she'd rather have a crappy relationship than no relationship at all. Lonely is a hard thing to feel all the time. But Poppy, sweetheart, you are not dumb! Your heart just needs time to heal and unravel all the bullshit Julri fed you.  Okay, this bit about Julri fucking gaslighting Poppy...NGL, it lit my brain on fire. 🔥🔥🔥🔥 Forget Tora going after him, forget Poppy verbally flogging him...I wanna backhand this motherfucker for making Poppy feel like she couldn't trust her own judgement. This is the kinda shit that makes me go momma bear for my friends with a quickness. 🤬🤬🤬 More kudos to Tora, who, sensing Poppy's discomfort, doesn't make her feel more uncomfortable with direct eye contact. Sometimes our eyes need distractions when having hard conversations. Also, I love how much Tora is validating Poppy's experience here. He may not understand all of it, but he's putting himself in her shoes- he of all people knows what it's like to feel stuck in something you can't leave. That look of anger as he says those lines speaks volumes; no wonder he resonates with Poppy so much. And then the bit where he tells Poppy that she's not alone in her experience, that being dumb/smart or experienced/inexperienced has nothing to do with what happened and imperatively- that it's NOT her fault. Okay, Tora...I'm gonna give you a candidacy under my license at this point because goddamn, that was beautifully done! 👏👏👏 I love, love this hopeful panel of Poppy saying she's not gonna let this bullshit artist of an ex-boyfriend break her down! Thata girl!! I just love seeing how her facial expression lifts- you can tell she feels lighter and able to breathe. I also feel it's important to note the panel composition here- Poppy is the only one in the frame. She will be okay to be alone, she can make it, man or no man. And then the next panel, we see Tora looking on in the background - perhaps a bit sad. Maybe reflecting on their short time left together? The day of the inevitable has come. He is the one who needs her. 💔💔😭😭 Lemme tell ya, I was so grateful for the humorous panels that followed. My heart needed a little respite and I love how Poppy just pulled the greatest inside joke on Tora here with the towed car. 🤣🤣 Inside jokes are the sign of a forever-relationship folks. I don't make the rules, it's just science. 🤣🤣 And I love how Tora has caught on to Poppy's game of the cute and small.  🤭🤭 But on a serious note, don't think I didn't catch you deflecting with humor again Poppy! 🧐🧐 Also, this Thug's Pavilion spot...I have a feeling those two will be back there again someday. Maybe Poppy does find her way up there on her own and they find each other again? Oh, the feels 😭😭 PS: that whole panel was so adorkable and wholesome. I love Poppy's little feet just dangling and OMG, he's holding her shoes?! 😭😭😭 🥰🥰🥰 But oh, there you go again ready to skewer my heart Lily… that drop in Poppy's face, the question "Is this goodbye for us?" 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭  And oh gods...the conversation those boys are having about the Shadow Division. 👀👀🧐🧐 Tora wasn't kidding when he said "Someone's gotta take out the trash." He's been cleaning up after Vincent for years. I definitely wanna know who else is in this elite group and WHO Tora has had to take out. *Oh please dear gods don't let it be Joe* 😳😳😳😬😬😬 Also, yay for more comedic bits...🤣🤣🤣 Aniki being in this one, I am DEAD. And Tora leaving the car in enemy territory (lovely parking job btw Tora 🤣🤣) to be picked up and some wads of cash?! Tora, honey, Poppy may have underestimated your level of thug, but you underestimate your level of Robin Hood. 😘😘 Okay, intermission of heart stomping over. Back to the pain. Why do I feel like part of Poppy was hoping he'd been lying about his gang involvement so she could keep him around? She looks really sad when he asks if she's relieved she won't have a "big scary thug" bothering her anymore. That's not the face of someone ready to let go. And then Tora is the one to let go here. I AM NOT OKAY PEOPLE. 😭😭 And Poppy not believing that she's pretty?! Honey, I'm with Tora on this one- anyone with eyes could see that! 😍😍😍 But oh, those ugly, nasty comments from Julri- I hate that those still play in her head. But I love that Tora counters them at every single turn. Tora met Poppy on literally the worst of days for her, completely disheveled, not feeling beautiful or wanted. And he fucking fell head over heels on sight. There's something about a man that sees you at your worst and still finds you beautiful. 💜💜💜 OHGODOHGODOHGOD...I've read this so many times, but bloody hell, when Poppy starts crying I fucking lose every time. AND THE HUG?! I CANNOT. 😭😭😭😭😭😭 I feel like that hug was for both of them (and I love that Poppy acknowledges this). Tora, my man, I'm pretty sure you just expressed your feelings just fine here. I HOWEVER, AM A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION PEOPLE. GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD.😭😭😭😭😭 Okay, okay... resurrected by humor once more. I love how many of their greatest hits they're reliving in this episode- the car towing, chasing down the tow-truck, Tora's bad parking skills,  "thank you", calling her Bobby, his pervy sense if humor, the throwing him over a cliff (🤣🤣), the banter. UGH MY HEART. 💜💜💜  Annnd just when I thought I had run out of tears...you come for more Lily?! 😭😭😭😭 Poppy's celebrating her birthday ALONE?! 😭😭😭😭😭 (Get used to this emoji, it's all I can use right now). HAPPY BIRTHDAY Baby girl!! 🎂🎂 And OH BOY. Momma Wilkes makes an appearance… that death glare, well I think we know exactly where Poppy gets her dark side from. But I have to wonder, was it nature or nurture in this case? Did Poppy spend enough time with her mom to see this dark side? Is this why Poppy tries so hard to mask how she feels and hiding it under a cutesy facade? I highly suspect it. 🧐🧐 And where in the world is Momma Wilkes? And more importantly, why is she gone?  FUCK FUCK FUCK...here come the water works again- how do I even have tears left at this point?! Tora gave her the ring and bracelet?!?! Holy fucking hell y'all!! 😭😭😭 Giving something that meaningful to her, thinking he'll never see her again?! He's leaving a piece of his heart with her. And the paper airplane note?! Y'all, seriously, just get digging a 6 foot hole and stick me in because I don't know if I can handle what's in the note. 😭😭😭 And Tora imagining Poppy standing there and then fading away?  Gaaaahhh KILL. ME. NOW. And how dark that panel is when he's resigned himself to saying goodbye?! I am speechless. 😭😭😭😭 Lily, ma'am, you have managed to break my heart to pieces and yet somehow I adore you for it. It's pouring cats and dogs outside and I feel like that's pretty fitting for how I feel right now. Like SRV always said, "The sky is crying"....😭😭😭 Alright fam, because I'm ever the musical masochist and I want you to suffer with me, I'll leave you with this song that pretty well gutted me as much as this episode. Goodnight. 💜💜💜 Fleurie- Hurts Like Hell  How can I say this without breaking? How can I say this without taking over? How can I put it down into words? When it's almost too much for my soul alone I loved, and I loved and I lost you I loved, and I loved and I lost you I loved, and I loved and I lost you And it hurts like hell Yeah, it hurts like hell I don't want them to know the secrets I don't want them to know the way I loved you I don't think they'd understand it, no I don't think they would accept me, no I loved, and I loved and I lost you I loved, and I loved and I lost you I loved, and I loved and I lost you And it hurts like hell Yeah, it hurts like hell Dreams fight with machines Inside my head like adversaries Come wrestle me free Clean from the war Your heart fits like a key Into the lock on the wall I turn it I turn it But I can't escape I turn it over I turn it over I loved, and I loved and I lost you I loved, and I loved and I lost you I loved, and I loved and I lost you And it hurts like hell

Martina Csiki

I wonder what's in the letter for Poppy. I think Tora knows it's her birthday (he did a background check on her in the beginning...he knew dark secrets of Trevor too so I don't find unbelievable to know Poppy's birthday too) Birthdays are part of the online records (ID, Licence card, Passport, medical records u name it). I think the bracelet and the ring are like a gift because he wanted to give something "personal" not a stuffed animal or amazon gift card 🤔 thoughts?

Actionsloth

I’m glad it’s not just me, was feeling a bit daft for a minute there 😭 The fact that it makes you feel just shows how amazing it is.

Raquel

Jesus... I’m speechless... I believe that love is hard and the more you fight for it, the more worthy is! That hug was far more powerful that any kiss... I just can wait for them to be together for real, acknowledge their feelings and for them to be the missing part in each other 🖤

Heather Hutton

That is one of my favorite songs. And yeah so fitting.

Yrudea

OK... What to say about this episode... It's just awesome. This hug is so unexpected, and therefore so powerful. It's the better way for Tora to show her his feelings. We all know they love each other, but they must leave. And it's so sad, even if I know they gonna meet again. And Poppy's still hunted by his ex boyfriend, or at least what he said to her. This son of a b*tch don' t deserve her and it's a good thing she left him. I hope Tora will soon realize he can't live without her. And, when they meet, I hope too he will say other things like "look into your damn mirror" to help her regain self-confidence. Also, the gift he gave her is a real and deep proof of love. I've never expected that, but it's a genius idea. Thank you for all, Lyly. I can't wait next Saturday to know the rest of Tora and Poppy's story. ❤️

sandra jamet

Reading this chapter with this song (Shattered Trading Yesterday) killed me :(... Can someone enlighten me on what tora holds in her hands when poppy looks at the pictures of her grandmother and her parents???

Brianna Logan-Hazzard

Ok... As the ever hopeful Aries that I am, here's my theory. Tora wrote some cute message on the paper plane saying something like "Would you wait for me?" Poppy will write her answer and then throw the plane down to Tora who's waiting in front of her building.

Derf n’ Bob

She already knew it was coming, he needed to say goodbye. But a love like that isn’t dying. It’s fighting to stay alive❤️

Rachel Rossi

I am broken 😢. Man they are so naturally at ease with each other but simultaneously so guarded just let go and be in the present 💗 OMG and he have her his ring and the hair tie back 😭 Lily please don’t break our hearts 🥺

Marie

Love this story! Can't wait to see where it goes. Hoping for happiness but I see it won't come easy.

Nordorr

Tora's tokens to Poppy and their significance in their relationship, the note, ring and bracelet, the airplane is when they first met, when he throws her notes on the train, the ring and bracelet are how she recognized him from saving her when she fell from the tree, how she knew she could trust him. When she saw beyond his big scary thug exterior. Last episode he asked her what altruistic meant because she said it in regards to hating how it felt to hurt others, and I would be shocked if it doesn't show up in Tora's vocabulary later to describe how he feels giving up Poppy to keep her safe. We've seen more insight into Tora's thoughts and feelings about Poppy, hers being the first hand he's held, how she gives him hope for an alternative life, the way his heart beats for her and how he wishes he could hold onto these moments with her just a little longer. We don't know how deeply he's affected Poppy, but there are some hints there that it wasn't one sided, and I believe Tora came into her life at just the right time for her to heal and recover from Julri. Alice told Poppy no self respecting woman chases after a man, so I think Poppy is going to respect Tora's goodbye, for now, at least. --tin foil hat crazy thought time-- Poppy's mom, maybe she just has RBF, or maybe that's the only picture she has of her parents, but I can't help but notice the similarities in that picture and the one of the Lam's. A happy person in the foreground with a creeper behind them. Maybe there was some subconscious drive for her portrait to see the Lam's both smiling because they had a happy marriage vs. her parents.

Lore Vera

In between the conversation, him holding her shoes, them hugging and saying thank you, Tora's laugh and wrinkles, Poppy's birthday, the ring and airplane, Tora crushing the hair tie and the last panel when he's looking down in the shadows. My heart can't take it 😭💔

saucytuggles

Note to self: Never comment the night of an episode. I feel hungover this morning, purely from emotions. And I didn’t even have any ice cream, booze or cat treats like my homegirls. Why am I reacting like this - some of it is the emotional amplification of a group, but bitch please. Taking a page from you ladies, here’s my notes. 1. I need to pay MUCH closer attention to Poppy’s expressions from here out. They are running easter eggs that Lily likes to play with so she can Agatha Christie the f out of us. Oh, you didn’t see Poppy startle at him unpacking or noticing his bracelet/ring in the fancy restaurant, or 10 other ways I misdirected your little head, did you? No I did not. But I’m going to be giving you my full attention now, little hamster. 2. Drunk chick list of fantasy ways for Poppy to get on back to Tora: develop a raging passion for hole-in-the-wall sushi places, surprise Jacob with a birthday bash at Club Midnight, go undercover for Lane, and of course, yoga. 3. Yeah, so what if the “boss” Tora refers to isn’t Vincent? 4. Tora: how do you talk so easily about your feelings? Also Tora: gives Poppy masters level therapy session about cheating ex and what it’s like to be trapped on the inside. Yeah he’s no stereotypical emotionally stunted bad boy. 5. Okay fine, let’s see the damn text. 6. Uncle Aniki was brilliant, and perfect to slow the tear river momentarily. 7. Ten bucks says Tora pretty much is the whole “shadow division.” 8. Hands. So many beautiful man hands. 9. The mental symmetry created by her impulsive kiss on the mouth and his impulsive bear hug is perfect and wrenching. Also, if holding his hand felt warm and nice, imagine what it’s like for her on a cold evening on a ledge in the wind being in that Tora wrap. 10. No, I refuse to fall prey to birthdays and dead parents and missing parents and paper airplanes and secret gifts and nope nope nope. Shake it off, girl, he’s still got the damn camera in the tree. So to return to my initial question, why. Why did this episode leave such deep skid marks on my heart? I think it’s the camera work. It’s not just the Poppy fade out to the empty street - which btw was such a LOW BLOW - takes short Kleenex break - it was the SECOND FRAME of the f-ing empty street when Lily panned sideways slightly, as if he was impossibly looking for her even knowing she wasn’t there. Goddamn it. Then the next two frames of pan out from searching Tora alone, to head tilt down face shadowed and small as he gives up the search. Oh my god. That camera work cracked me like a fucking egg. Still not okay.

TottyB

It's all good people, it's all good. The reunion will begin soon. 😊😊😊❤

Lee4992

I forgot to say that I think Poppy’s boss found the notebook on Poppy’s desk when he came back from his trip early and grabbed other things from her desk(remember guys). At one point Poppy said she is helping Gil run a tabloid-adjacent publication. I think Gil is going to unilaterally publish what he found, cause like they’ve said Goldfish is looking for capitol. However if my theory were to pan out it would make it near impossible for Tora to protect Poppy, so I don’t know. While I’m diving off the deep end there is one Secret Garden where it look like Poppy and Tora are on the floor of a motel room making love and there is blood on Tora and I’ve wondered if down the road Tora will have to kill someone to save Poppy and then they have the hide out and then Poppy is overcome with emotion from Tora saving her life and they finally do the deed, I’ve hypothesized about what’s going on in that sketch?!?

Dyane Rodriguez

I had to gather my thoughts after reading this chapter and let me just say that I am glad she told Tora how her ex treated her.. I like how great Tora handles it and reassures her that she is nothing that her ex says she was and that it’s not her fault for being manipulated by julri.. I also like how he radiates honesty and I think that’s a breathe of fresh air for poppy.. she is able to be comfortable with him and she is able to open up to him.. so it made me sad when he said his goodbyes to her; however he showed her, her place in his life when he hugged her and mostly when he gave her his ring and bracelet.. I know there is going to be more to this but it is just sad because of so much Chemistry they have..

KH

Lily, thank you for finding a way to put so much emotion into that hug, the amount of feeling in those visuals is simply astounding. You combined such a sorrowful goodbye with so much sweetness ❤️ There may be more dialogue in future episodes, but his last line to her - He knows the sound of her laughter (and she, his.) Another intimate and powerful thing among so much in just the last few episodes. Bravo 👏🏼

Lee4992

@Lilydusk - we are going to need more SG’s to fill in for Tora and Poppy’s time apart!

Katy Lee

@Lilydusk- my heart 💔 please tell me it will all be ok...

Raquel

I keep thinking that when Tora said “shut up and hug me back” is almost the same Yuwa tells Ullan in that special last chapter “shut up and kiss me back” My heart can’t take it 🖤

TottyB

That last picture of the paper plane symbolises the relationship between Tora and Poppy is about to take off very quickly......😊😊😊😊😊😊

Roxanne Ferland

I didn’t sleep at all last night!!! I feel like I have a heartbreak, I’m still a complete mess this morning, I keep crying over and over again just to think about it.!!! Tora can’t give up his light!!! Please be the reunion between those two be soon!! It’s going to be a long week until next friday

Gracileuda Silva

Hello dear Lily I'm new hear. This ep. melted my heart, thank you so much for this amazing masterpiece. ❤😊

romanycreams

My brain and my heart are still processing everything that happened in this episode 🥺❤️ On a lighter note, maybe Tora had to say goodbye so that we could finally have the long awaited love story of Poppy and Aniki 🤣

CINTHIA V

OMG !!!My heart broke into a thousand pieces when I saw Tora's sad face ,i really cry with this episode.

Kayla

Im literally looking at the MPL fan group (non FP) happy and full of joy bc they just made it to the kiss episode. Meanwhile Im sitting here DEPRESSED. Bc this author is absolutely amazing and this wait for the next chapter is going to be torture !

Kelee Parker

My heart is shattered with this episode 💔💔💔 I wish she had told him it was her birthday or that he found the cake. I wish here didnt say goodbye to his only happiness😭 and I hope she doesn't let him go. Girl you got his number, use it til he gives in. You know he isn't strong enough to block you😭😭

Eri821

My heart... my heart can’t take it. She needs to text him to come back or stay or whatever. They need each other.... 😭😭😭

ladyface

What will happen next? None of us REALLY know and that’s the beauty of this superior storytelling of Lily’s. 💕

BlueCaty

I am not ok. This is so hard to process. I thought I was prepared for a heartbreak, but I was so so wrong. "Delaying the inevitable just for today" (from ep 35) - which happened just yesterday in the timeline - has a heavier meaning now. Tora just kept saying for several episodes that he wants to get out of her life, that he wants to keep her away from fear and paranoia. I think we as readers were wishing so hard that they get together, that maybe we didn't see it, didn't want to believe he will actually keep his word. The fact that they are so comfortable in each other's presence, that they know it and despite of it they still say goodbye...so sad. He knew it was her birthday (Gyu did a background check, so it's plausible) and he chooses to give her his ring and bracelet (which I assume he got from Joe, the only true paternal figure he had that we know of). His gift is part of him, and the strawberry hair tie he kept is part of her. I will never be ready to be heartbroken, to see what's in the airplane note, to see them stray apart, but I also know that real growth and real love comes with the price of pain and loss. And the funny thing is when you give away a part of yourself...you will spend your life trying to have it back, to be complete again. So I will wait until they meet again, until their love is strong enough for them to see it and fight for it. Their loneliness without each other - she blowing the candles alone, he finding himself alone on her empty street, the cinematics of her smiling face dissapearing... I am soulbroken. For now.

Life is beautiful

I have had the kissing scene as my wallpaper now I am All like should I change it.... I hope they do end up together... I think if she ends up with Quincy as others are saying that will be the end of MPL... For me...

Gizemdrawssometimes

Guys I'm not kidding I walked into work crying this morning because I read it on my way to work, luckily I was the first one in wow what an episode

Vita

Is there a word limit on Patreon? I'm having trouble posting my analysis :/

Ezra V

Man I’m all sad listening to John Redcorn by SiR and it reminded me of tora at the end 😭 like is this what he’s mood feels like? But without being the side dude(that’s what the songs about). Or even poppy if you really think about it. Mostly anyone who feels alone. My heart and my eyes hurt 😭 my brain told me “see you don’t need to blame yourself.” Thank you lily, I’ve never felt such strong emotions towards a fictional story but man have you really dig yourself deep into my heart and reopened a lot of pain that I haven’t let go completely...

~LostSoul~

This episode brings up so many emotions. Poppy dear, I know how you feel about someone you care about saying those things to you and not being sure if you should leave. You feel like that's the best you can do and it's better than being alone, even though you still feel alone with that person beside you. You always strive to be what they want, to make things better, to hold on because you hope it will get better. You feel like your the one that has something wrong with you because the other person gets good at making you feel that way. Like they are the normal one and you're just some broken thing. This episode resonates with me in so many ways...wish I had a Tora to talk to! Thank you Lilysan...you are amazing!! ♥️

Ms Millennial Pink

So many beautiful insights and comments about the episode! 😭 I have some LOOONG ramblings here so sorry in advance, guys! This episode truly got to me: 1) I'm still processing the hug and the deep connection and recognition of feeling trapped inside toxic circumstances. It's like Poppy put it in words what he experiences and I feel like Tora needed that hug more than Poppy. It really shows in how he's grabbing her with all he has and she's still a bit uncomfortable with it, pat patting his back, not sure how to process it, but it's an amazing contrast to how their first hug went down and how he was the one who "jumped" her this time with affection because that's what one does with friends and family as Poppy stated to him. I can hear a "I feel safer with you in the edge of this precipice than anywhere else" going on in his mind. She might need that rope but all he needs is her to keep him grounded. It's also interesting to think about the contrast of Poppy being tied up and talking about finally being free and Tora being there without any sort of the same and being the one feeling trapped. Feeling safe, cared for, protected in that sense it's what frees us? It makes me think of the contrast between the idea of a "unbearable lightness of being" and Nietzsche's concept of heaviness and eternal recurrence, a contrast that Milan Kundera explores in his romance and that hits me hard when I think about those two. Heaviness might be associated with burden but it's also that which grounds us to earth and to ourselves. When Lily states that all the dots are connected and that this two people are meant to be together as they already were in past lives and bound to repeat that eternally it's like taking a philosophical stance for the "heaviness" of eternal recurrence. Tora like Kundera's Tereza wants to belong to somebody not in the sense that he belongs to Vincent but to ground himself to a purpose and to a loved someone. He's grabbing her like his life depends on it, like she's the only thing grounding him and keeping him from just puffing away like her image does at the end of the episode. The "lightness" of this life he has so far is unbearable and the emotional connections he stabilishes are the only thing that keeps him grounded. In that sense the visual metaphor of both of them hanging in the edge of this cliff, Tora tying Poppy to safety and hanging loose on the edge of a fall is again very symbolic. What does that fall represent? Falling in love? Falling for his death? Free falling not being held by any anchoring weight to hold him? What matters is that Poppy is grounded. Poppy is safe. Poppy is being held back or symbolizing that weight which bound us to life while Tora is there ready to take the plunge but holding on to her. That makes me see the whole giving her all his precious belongings as an act of goodbye in more ways than one. Those are the only tokens he has of the emotional connections that grounded him to life before Poppy, and he's giving it to her. He's going on a suicidal mission and probably feels like he might not make it. That ring and bracelet were passed on to him in face of Joe's passing and now he's passing them on to Poppy. But he kept her strawberry hairtie as a "here's hoping". Here's hoping I make it, here's the reminder of something weighting me down and keeping me from free falling, and when her image vanishes he grabs it, he holds on to that concrete reminder of something that abstractly he cannot hold on to.

TicklemeAli

Welcome to my heart and entrails been ripped to shreds followed by 12 hours of insipid whimpering... *inhales* I know we strong independent vajay jays who don’t need no man and when they go low we go high, however... My psychotic gemini twin needs revenge.... BLOODY, PAINFULL, MAYBE VOODOO INDUCED REVENGE on a PIECE OF MANURE CALLED JULRI. THIS MOTHERFUCKER... I swear. First of all, do you even KNOW what it requires for a bitch to look NATURAL in makeup!?!?! *offended in beautuber* Second, a bitch can fix her face with bondo... BUT no AMOUNT of makeup CAN👏🏼 FIX 👏🏼 THAT 👏🏼 DICK 👏🏼 . You gaslighting piece of shit. I hope SOMEBODY ANYBODY will give yo ass a beating. “Is this goodbye for us?” .... say wut now? YOU PUT THAT SENTENCE BACK IN YOUR MOUTH!!!!!!!!! Gentlemen please take notes. You can be part of a super secret badass Mafia Swat team that kills people and STILL be a DAMN 👏🏼 ASS 👏🏼 FINE 👏🏼 SUPPORTIVE 👏🏼 CHEERLEADER 👏🏼 FOR YA HAMSTER, who also hold tiny shoes with hand *cries in emotional thug maturity* This is love and Im ready to defend it with bullets and bitch slaps. Try me hoes ImfineimfineEverythingsfineWerefineAllisfine Am a manatee in a sea of plankton despair. This can’t be happening. Why is this hug so beautiful and heartbreaking and funny and.... im not fine. THIS IS NOT OK! IT WAS HER BIRTHDAY!?!?!?!?! Lily...... Li........ *sighs* ... IT WAS HER BIRTHDAY!???!???? I need a minute Mama Wilkes looks like she has said “hold ma earrings imma beat this bitch” one to many times. We know our way round the coke ring huh lady? Heh... Baby boi I know you think yo ass is dying but you’re ain’t going nowhere... our hamster first needs to manhandle you some moar. Did I say this is love? ‘Cause this is love... k? Cool Bai ✌🏼

Lynzeth

This may be the wrong place for it but someone please remind me why he calls her Bobby sometimes, I keep forgetting. Lol

KIMBERLY CRETIN

I just want to live under a rock until their get back together, my heart is so heartbroken, I'm passing through the stages of grief, yesterday I got myself drunk to death because of this, and today I woke up extra hangover and sadder than ever 😭💔, I need a bucket of ice cream and some romantic movies 🥺😢

Lee4992

I want to take a stab at what’s in Tora’s note.......”Bobby my little hamster, I wanted to wish you a HBD tonight but realized that it would be weird me knowing that without you having told me. I thought about buying you expensive jewelry or getting flowers or a cake but in the end I felt the best gift I could give would be a piece of me. The ring and bracelet I wear were given to me by someone who meant a lot to me and impacted me in a way I never forgot and now I want to pass them on to someone else who has made an impression on me in a way no one ever has before. Poppy I don’t want to let you go but it’s for the best. I live in a dangerous world and I don’t want you any further involved in it, so although I hate to say goodbye I have to for your own safety. Now I’ll only be able to pinch those cute little cheeks in my dreams but I suppose my dreams and the memories of rice tiger will just have to sustain me.

Leslie

EDIT: everyone’s comments are healing my soul. I love you and your brains and your emotional intelligence and all the things you see and think. Hugs for you Lily, and for all of you MPL’ers, and for me, because oh wow. Oh wow. My heart hurts. I’m a bit sensitive because this is the anniversary of the dissolution of my own “happily ever after” so I think other people not having theirs hits especially close. ………… First. Going back to episode 37, after Poppy asks Tora to come over....those 3 panels of Tora’s reaction (noseless), the tapping the response, the sitting after he hit send.....I see him sitting in defeat this time, because after all, he just sent a “goodbye” text. No wonder he looks so small and alone sitting against that wall...... Ep 39. Tora, way to show up for Pops. Asking if she is sad, giving her space to express her frustration....oh you sweetie. I will not befoul this space and all the hurt we are all feeling by mentioning the gaslighting J-word and making this worse. Oh Poppy you poor girl. But I am glad she knew he wasn’t right, even if she didn’t know how to leave. And PROPS - PROPS, I SAY - to Poppy for trusting her own previously-gaslit internal compass to act with such agency from DAY ONE with Tora. YES GIRL. YES. I am SO PROUD of you and how immediately you committed to a different way of living and engaging with someone. We’ve all been singing Bobby’s praises for her agency - if there’s joy to be had in this episode, it’s understanding how dramatic and SUDDEN the change was in Poppy’s life without the J-word. I have no space, energy, or compassion for gaslighting scum. Tora holding her and her shoes, feet dangling off the edge. It’s the easiest posture I’ve ever seen him in. It’s so gentle - the way he touches her and everything she owns. I don’t buy much into typical heterosexual relationship dynamics but it is devastatingly tender to see someone whose modus operandi is in power and force and strength and breaking things hold Poppy and her shoes as softly as if they’re a baby bird. TORA STOP WITH THE FACE I AM GOING TO CRY. AGAIN. The way he looked at her when she spread her wings a little. I cannot hold enough emotional space to comprehend his pride in her resilience, his awe in her optimism, Poppy’s own determination, the joy in them finding each other, and the grief of impending separation both are holding. I can’t do it. My stomach hurts. AND POPPY. STOP DEFLECTING WITH HUMOR IT CRACKS MY HEART. Even though your boldness just makes me smile inside. And outside. God Bobby is perfect I can’t. No fucking wonder Tora is in love. Tora wants her to find another person to drive her to the top of the mountain. He wants her to come back. He wants her to see the view and have happiness even if not with him. I. AM. NOT. FINE. OK so Tora grabbed Bobby her muffin and then just walked off with someone else’s car to bring her said muffin. You were a delivery boy for “that hamster” LONG before you ever saw that painting, my dude. Tora always pays his debts.....I am...afraid of how that is going to play out, eventually. Why steal the car? That’s not an accident. To keep the clan from finding out about Pops? But he has already asked “his men” to keep an eye on her place. To hide clan activity from the police? Makes sense if he had a sniper gig the next night. Does his going underground have to do with Vince? Or his work with Gyu and/or the police? I can’t actually say if I think he’s about to disappear because he thinks he’s putting Poppy at risk (with nothing really changed in his clan life) or if he’s going underground because he and Gyu have sabotaged the Balthuman’s and have to hide from them, or if he has to do a top secret clan assignment. He’s trapped on the inside no matter what. Poppy has the key to this cage, I’m totally sure of it, I just don’t know how. I don’t know if we are about to see a time jump. The breakup sets us up for a jump to months or years later.....but things seem set up at a boiling point in the clan, and Poppy has to figure out Q. in the nearer term, so I’m not sure if/when we will see a jump. This separation is going to make them both so much stronger, but I hope they stay connected to their honesty when they see one another again. I am glad this comic isn’t a “do they like one another?” comic - it seems to follow HOW they will eventually come together, not IF they have feelings for one another. But that makes the pain more real, knowing that their connection is also real. Oh Lily. Why? I’m proud of Pops for not stifling the question she really had when Tora asked if she was relieved. I’m proud of her for not deflecting. And I’m proud of Tora for meeting honesty with honesty. But taking his hand off her shoulder - as if he can’t bear to have her push it off herself - and essentially admitting to her worst fears just hurts. Oh and Poppy, STILL trying to lighten the mood, STILL trying to take the weight of someone else’s pain, STILL living up to her own admission that she HATES hurting people - trying to take the sting out of her own question and implicit accusation of Tora by teasing him again and pretending everything is okay, clinging to things being ok for just a few more seconds..... I need a cry break. Ok. Fuck that guy. Fuck him. Gaslighters have a ring of hell all to themselves and I will meet them there with a pitchfork and rage. Oh Tora. Oh Tora you sweet gentle giant. I want you to have the opportunity to see Bobby’s face every damn day for the rest of both of your lives and I KNOW you will tell her how beautiful she is for every single one of those days. If anyone is good and kind enough to deserve Poppy, you are making the greatest of cases for it. I love how simply and honestly Tora meets Poppy’s vulnerability where she’s at. Once again, the tiger is gentle enough not to crush the flower. EXCEPT THATCRUSHING HUG AND POPPY TRYING TO MAKE SURE SHE DOESNT HURT TOra by telling him it was so good to meet him WHO HAS EVER TOLD TORA THEY ARE GLAD THEY MET HIM WHO I AM N- -cry break- Stop joking it hurts. I can feel myself shriveling inside from how sad this is. They’re both trying so hard to buoy the other one up..... I don’t know how to feel about the cake. The anticipation of him seeing it and the subsequent letdown is bitter. Happy birthday Pops. Your dad would be SO proud. I bet your gran is too. Withholding judgement on Ma but I’m skeptical. Pops needs a hug. Lily can you draw me into the panel next week just so SOMEONE CAN HUG POPPY I MEAN FOR THE LOVE OF GOD???? Poppy stop squashing your own broken heart for the sake of a man’s feelings, even a man as wonderful as Tora. He can take it. He’ll sift through the pain with you and you’ll put the pieces back together. They’re both too kind at heart for their own good. Those last TWENTY panels. TWENTY. The ring the paper plane the bracelet the hair tie the fade out. I have nothing. I have nothing but sadness and dread. I’m going back to my corner. I don’t have the capacity to catch marbles. All I want is to comfort these two lost spirits and see them safely through the trials ahead so they can come back to rest and happiness with one another. This episode left me hollowed out. My whole body hurts.

Life is beautiful

I have cried like you... I have questions... I just want poppy to run out of her apartment and run to him! Her man! The one who saw through all her flaws! After all his HER lethal weapon..

Christina Agan

How do I know this episode was a heart breaker? My boyfriend, my sweet boyfriend who only recently started reading MPL with me read the episode last night, and was so upset. He was awake randomly at 4am and like: “they’re going to get back together, right? She’s eating her birthday cake alone and that’s not okay! He needs to get back to her!” 4am, folks. Once again, the subtle changes in lighting and color made this episode incredible, even if it did shatter my heart. Also, quick inventory. Poppy has: his hoodie, ring and bracelet and possibly the notebook still. His REAL phone number AND Quincey’s number. Tora has her strawberry hair tie, a picture of her bento box, and the camera is still outside her apartment. He didn’t leave her alone. He can still make sure she’s safe.....

Starii

sad hours activated!

Pink Moon

Well I don’t think my heart has been this broken by a fictional character since Harry Potter was smashing the dumbledore s office after his god father died. And that’s saying something. Man is my heart in pieces, I just, I can’t

Nina Castelmonti

I don't think you can get out of the mafia alive with a boss like Vincent. If Tora tries to betray him or leave he will kill him, or he will try. If I were Vincent, and Tora left I would go crazy.

PhoenixFyre

You can also feel the loneliness in Tora. He is going through emotions he either never felt or wasn't allowed to feel. Quince is cool but his dad has to go for what he did to Tora as a kid. Very abusive. Poppy is good for him and I love her positive attitude which is good for Tora. She is also different from all the girls that chase him. She is fun to be with also. Damn I love the difference of where they both came from.

Christina Agan

I want to also take a moment to acknowledge Lily’s feelings in all this. As painful as this has been for us, the readers in the fandom, this also must have been hard for Lily. These characters are her brain children and you can tell by the love and care she puts into this webtoon every episode, that they mean at lot to her. I’m sitting here processing how much this episode hurts me, but for Lily, even if she knows what comes next, it’s still not easy, I’d imagine. Either way, thank you, Lily, for this episode.

Blueberry

Is it hard for poppy to show affection? She seams like she’s awkward with showing it

Erica Vanesa

The song Passenger Seat by Stephen Speaks came on for me while reading and omg the FEELS. I highly recommend especially considering we may get a view in the next episodes of the car ride back to Poppy’s apartment 🥺❤️ “Oh and I've got all that I need Right here in the passenger seat Oh and I can't keep my eyes on the road Knowing that she's inches from me”

Bronwyn Stoddard

And to think, about a week ago (in their time, it was so many episodes ago for us!) Tora characterized Poppy hugging him in the 24-hour grocery as "attacking" him. That hug says so much about what kind of impact she's had on him. I love both of these characters so much, and I will cherish every last frame of their relationship, regardless of where it goes or how long we get to spend with them. Thank you, Lilydusk, for sharing this with all of us ❤️

Jo.Rho

I usually read so quietly, but when I saw the ring and the paper plane in the bento box, I shouted, "NOOOOOOOO!!" Ugh, my heart can't take it!

Kait

I am CRYING in the CLUB (joking about the club but not about the crying)

Michelle Le

Am I the only one who laughed at the reference to Aniki from one of the Secret Garden chapters?! I had to find the humor in this episode somewhere.

Christina Agan

I’m just going to my own personal head canon space. About 2 years from now in MPL time, Tora and Poppy sitting on the porch of a beach house somewhere, it’s sunset. Tora softly playing his guitar, and Poppy humming along with his song. It’s peaceful. Tora doesn’t have to dream about the beach, it’s right at his feet. The ocean air is clean, Poppy is writing her own book. Quincey, Gyu and Erdene are coming over for a bonfire that night. Granny Alice called earlier to tell them she wants them over for dinner next week. She misses them. They’re all happy. This is my own personal head canon. I’m just gonna focus on that so I don’t sob all night......

EmeryDiLoncrete

Come to think of it, this is the first wave of fans crying. Second wave will be when the episode is up for everyone.

Anya

I think a lot of us have been there. In this episode Tora hugged us too. 😍can't wsit until next week. yay!

Lilydusk

MPL challenge for the week - go back two episodes in time and read from the angle of them thinking it's probably their last night together (and also how it's Poppy's birthday). That would be me, these past few weeks 🥺🥺🥺😂😂

Katy Huckelby

I GET WHY BUT...... but the first time I buy those stupid coins to get a fast pass..... it has to be a sad one!!!!!!

Ms Millennial Pink

Okay... So I just reread that last couple of episodes in face of their goodbye like Lily suggested and I am not okay... 😭 The punch on the wall and the strawberry hairtie. At first it just seemed like being reminded of Poppy was what dissuaded a bit of all the pain and anger going through him. But now... It just feels like there's more painful stuff than what went on... And the light switch turns inside him from rage to just sadness and resignation. "I'm all yours tonight" - tonight, as in we're on borrowed timed here, but I'll give you all the time I have left. Tonight. At first I just looked at this line as a contrast to how he says "I ain't got all night" when he cushions her fall from the tree... Like she literally falls. On him. And he has "no time" for that. But now he would be welcoming it. But rereading it with this new perspective in mind just makes me think of a "last round, show all your cards", there won't be a next time, make the best of it. And revising all the laughter, the banter, the openness, the light and not so light touches (Poppy, be gentle, bruh! - not really) and the whole exchange in face of that is too heartbreaking. "Cursed to be mafia for life" - that one got me thinking a lot... I previously assumed he was setting a plan in motion to leave the clan. Maybe working with Lane. But if the curse is right... "For life" - I'm going on a suicide mission here; I'm only leaving this shit dead... so be it. Unless like in Asura's Bride is his gentleness to the enemy that breaks the curse. Maybe Poppy breaks his curse. Their connection sets both of them free. And that "for life" there might be an analogue fake death? And "for life" becomes a blessing over their union instead. HERE'S HOPING "No grown-ups, no cops, none of that shit" - When I first looked at this scene and this nostalgic look he has on his face I just thought back on the "Photograph" song and how Lily mentioned how bittersweet it was for him to look back on his teen years. But seeing his face now... It seems way more about the current moment he's experiencing than the past itself. Back then, here in this place, I had none of that shit over my head... It also breaks my heart to think that he's revising his life there. Like one does when faces their own upcoming death... All the while, Poppy is braiding his hair. Preparing him for war. Like the ancient Narin soldiers would. "Is like the people are gone, but part of them is still here" - GOD DAMMIT TORA! 😭 foreshadowing much? He's talking about all that he lost, he's talking about the bracelet, about the mementos with friends that remain there in the graffitis and that place, but ultimately he's talking about himself, and the items he's leaving behind as a gift for her, for when he's also gone... Like all of them are, like "hope" (the graffiti tag) is. I'm not okay you guys.... "But leaving him was the right decision to make. Because it finally feels like I can breathe again. So I think I'll be okay" - Tora looks at her with such an intense look. How he wishes he could say the same about himself. That look... such a mixed feelings expression. Bittersweet contentment, longing, defeat, hope, proud of her, moved, wishing he could say the same... Despair, acceptance, hope... The graffiti, the strawberry hairtie, the colours and the use of light and shadows in this episode... It all seems to be revolving around this bittersweet mix. Parting is such sweet sorrow that I shall say goodnight till it be morrow. I swear this last episodes just broke me. This webcomic is so beautiful and sensitive... I have a lump on my throat and it just won't stop even though I know they'll ultimately be together. Rereading this past episodes made me think back on something a friend once taught me. She was teaching me self defense and when showing me a move she just said to me "when they come for you, don't push them away. Pull them in. Pull them towards you. That way they lose their balance and when they fall and collide with you THEN is your time to run away".... Well, Poppy doesn't push him away. She pulls him to her. Pulls him in. But now that they collided (here's the soundtrack in my mind now) and he fell... She doesn't want to run away but he's the one who's pushing her towards safety.

MissT

I can't help but realize that the whole time they were sitting on the ledge being vulnerable, the night sky was what they were looking at, unfettered. No bars, no sense of being underground or caged. I can't wait for them to get back to a place like that - where they can enjoy the way they make the other feel free and safe rather than dreading a goodbye 😭

Matcha_Cakes

Well, Now that ive had some time to process *clutches heart like Tora* I can put my thoughts down here. First of all @lilydusk, thank you so much for this episode, it was hard but I have always felt that they wouldn't be able to just immediately mesh together even though they have such a strong connection . I think that this arc was beautiful and we will still see more of them in the future. They are still connected and in Tora's heart he wants to "live differently" although the logistics of leaving a gang are usually impossible. They will see each other again because of Quincy. Quincy pointing out that Pops is Tora's type makes me feel like he will want to "ship" them just like the rest of us! I can hear / see Quincy being like "where were you, you let her go!? you Neanderthal!" I'm excited to see this all unfold. Lily you are such an artist, thank you for sharing this with us <3 <3 <3

Inês Serra

I just finished rereading MPL all over again. It hit harder than ever, I can't stop crying. Lily you lil devil, how do you expect me to wait until next Friday :((( I have so many thoughts on all of this, it's so hard to put into words. This story really has been the only thing I'm excited about every week, thank you for making me feel something, even if it's pure heart wrenching angst ;)

Rebecca Darby

I've done my first re-read in quite a while, with the playlist on and everything. It's so good to go back and see again all the little clues and hints and side characters I'd forgotten about. It's taken a good chunk of today, there's a lot of material - and that's not including going back and forth to catch some tiny reference or other 😉 I'm still heartbroken about this episode! It made me cry again when I was just thinking about it a couple days ago (and what Webtoon takes up this much headspace?). God what a gut punch 😭😭😭 I guess I've never been good at doing "the right thing" vs what (who) I want... the few times I've tried not to fall for someone, it's backfired on me and I've ended up running back to them. I suppose what this re-read has done is highlight all the craziness that went on since Poppy and Tora met not so long ago in a small town called Moonbright. The sheer comedy of them bumping into each other over and over, in the most unlikely locations. How they kept (unconsciously) touching each other before they'd even swapped names. It's very, very hard for me to see how that doesn't override all other factors... which I guess tells you what kind of person I am, eh! Gonna go sit on my bed and plink at my guitar sadly until the next episode drops... HOW are they gonna come back? Will Quincey have a hand in it, or will they miss each other until they figure it out? Will Tora bounce back after whatever job Vincent has him on next?

Veronica Weston

I have this sinking feeling that this could be one of those love stories that does not necessarily have a happy ending for both protagonists. I keep thinking of the book/movie Me Before You by JoJo Moyes...where the protagonists fall in love but because of certain life events, they part ways(not trying to give spoilers for those that haven’t read or seen the movie). But it’s in their parting that left a life changing impact that helps them move forward in life in the most positive and profound way that would not have happened if they stayed together....

MollzJJ

Well I’ve been trying to catch up on all the comments but my poor phone can’t seem to load 700+ comments without crashing lol. I keep starting a thread and then bam app crashes. I’d use my laptop but my daughter accidentally dropped it and cracked the LCD screen, so I’m waiting for the replacement screen to come on Tuesday so I can replace it. Argh 😤 just having a little fit because I wanna read everyone’s thoughts since Friday night!!

Chloe Hopkins

Nothing to do with the chapter but I can really imagine them getting a big ass dog, poppy be like them videos of babies cuddling vicious looking dogs

Rosemary Hunt

Ok... so who else is on the boat where while waiting for the next episode you go back and start from the beginning?!?! I think I've read episode 2 about a dozen times or more... and I just noticed something about the scene with Goliath at the casino table... everyone around him has a blanked out face... except the woman next to him...

Lee4992

Ok, I’m ready to take a pause from grieving this temporary “break up” and flash back to my favorite SG which was when Poppy and Tora visit the hot springs and Erdene sets them up. First, I love how Erdene planted the note for Poppy but Tora didn’t need to be filled in at all because it was given Tora would be following Poppy where ever she hid. Then I loved how incised Tora was at the idea that Bobby would keep her person from his person ( of course that’s only cool when a couple is already on that level). I need more Secret Garden!

Leslie

If you need yet ANOTHER sad soundtrack....”Leaving on a Jet Plane” by Peter Paul and Mary.....

TicklemeAli

Sooo we are all in agreement that he low key “put a ring on it”... yeah? No? I mean, it was a ring, and he kind of like gave it to her.... and she can like... you know, wear it. Si? No? Anybody? *takes self out in Beyonce* 🦦💨💨💨

Noey Kamaril

There’s one song, indie alternative band from Australia - Thirsty Merc titled Someday, Someday back in my Uni day. Up until this ‘sayonara’ i only reread specific episode..but the lyrics kind related with whole 39 episodes Someday, someday I'll know that you love me Someday, someday I just need you here with me Don't have to try Love will take us there babe Someday, someday I will be the one babe Someday, someday Look towards the sky babe Someday, Someday There's no need to cry babe I know that you're always what I want babe I will be the one babe Someday, I will be the one babe Someday, I just need you here with me Now i have water in my eyes on my way for workout. Here’s the spotify link if anyone of you want to check out: https://open.spotify.com/track/6bPZQf8qxgKYaNmPInGZ7F?si=EMUJT4jsSf6KvG5CpYXCaA

Ruth

"Dancing" by Elisa. First time I heard the song was from SYTYCD season 3. Beautiful song and beautiful dance in my opinion. I feel like it could be a soundtrack for this episode as well. Especially when Tora hug Poppy. He's about to get away from her life, but still gonna watch her from afar.

Christina Agan

Lily, A few of us were talking about Tora’s leg tattoo and the topic of how much detail goes into your work came up. We had a question. Do you draw his tattoos each time you show them? Or do you have a short cut? Like a piece of artwork/template you copy/paste onto his body when you need to? Just curious. They are so beautifully done and look so nice each time you show them

Jessisafan♡

I absolutely adored this episode!❤❤❤

Lilydusk

One more thing (just dropping comments as they cross my mind 😢). That moment when Tora took hold of Poppy's hand, as she was trying to stop herself from crying. This is the first time (since the story started), that Poppy isn't crying alone. Poppy's been holding it together, all by her own lonesome self. But this time, someone notices, is actually paying attention to her, and is trying to take away her sadness, instead of her having to do her own self-soothing.

Ms Millennial Pink

Oh gods, when I thought I couldn't cry anymore over the last episode life comes and proves me wrong! 😭 You guys..... Doing a reread of episode #15 a friend pointed out the contrast between the scene of Tora coming across Poppy smelling the fake plastic tree in front of Alice's and this episode and now my heart is breaking all over again!!! Their first date: "...but I'm searching for an answer myself. Maybe that's just how it is for people like us. When all we can do... Is to stumble through the dark. Wondering if we'll ever get to see the light someday" (The same light he keeps seeing through bars in his flashbacks. Unobtainable) And enters Poppy. He is walking towards her. In the dark, and she's surrounded by this warm glow. Poppy lights up the darkness. Cuts to last date: The image of Poppy locking the gate and walking towards him vanishes. And with it the all the light. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Emdiaznorton

Hello fellow patrons and Lily! I’m Emily(or Em) and I’ve been reading MPL as a nonFPer since the beginning of April and have been a patron for about a month now. I finally caught up to reading every single comment thread all the way back from episode 1 and it’s been a blast getting to know Lily and fellow patrons/their personalities through ALL the comments😄! I’m super anxious posting this but here’s my first ever comic comment😳... So, I have finally given in to the Fast Pass just a couple days ago and am here at the same point with this amazing community...and I think I’m ready to don my tin foil hat and share my “notebook” thought that I’ve been sitting on for about a month now(I wanted to make sure I was caught up/had read and processed other shared theories). I don’t think this theory has been talked about here in Patreon but please forgive me if it has been! *takes a breath and puts hat on head* —What if Mr. Lam has the notebook?— I can gather that Lily never unintentionally throws out leads but the notebook is a loose end that I think she’s baffled us with because there are actually quite a few things that could have happened to it. I think the most common idea out there is that Gil has inadvertently taken it from her table when he grabbed the reports he mentioned in ep. 30. I think that comment is there for a reason and it’s the most plausible theory if you’re reading through and not getting all conspiracy theory about the notebook’s whereabouts... and here I am with my hat on saying that I think it may have been unknowingly passed to Mr.Lam... by Poppy... In ep.30, Poppy rushes off to see Mr.Lam in the restaurant from work as soon as she hears from Mr.Lam. I’m assuming she grabs the proposal and shoves it in her fancy and fun/new(to her?) yellow bag as she runs off to get ready for the lunch. In her mind, everything’s all set with it because she’s organized everything... right? In the second panel of their restaurant scene (still ep.30) we see only a binder on the table but everyone, look closely at that binder and there’s a book/notebook inside 🤔... I’m a very visual person and once I saw that in there, I couldn’t not theorize that it was THE notebook. Plus I feel like Lily doesn’t include things like a detailed still of a binder sitting on a table for nothing... every panel takes time, so I really felt like it was there for a reason. Lily drops both linguistic and visual hints all throughout her stories in both the most blatant and subtle of ways. Now, I understand she wrote a huge report for this proposal and it could have very well been that report bound up nicely like a book/notebook but the last we knew of the report, is that it was written out in loose leaf pages and when I think of a binder’s purpose that’s what should have been organized in there, loose papers or papers in sheet protectors or something. Not a perfectly glued together and nicely bound book(yeah she works for a publishing co. But work with me here!). My theory is that Poppy emptied the contents of her brown bag onto her work table(ep.21 panel 39-40?) and we see the black spine of the notebook in the stack of work she pulls out. At that point, she is rushing to get over to that hotel so while she remembers the following morning that she “organized everything” she never went through thoroughly item by item organizing so she never came across the notebook being in the stack on her table that afternoon before her wild night on Ares St. Then, jumping to ep.30, Gil mentions he grabbed things from her table but he had to have shuffled through items to find what he needed, right? So maybe he shuffled somethings together and inadvertently stuck the wrong book in the wrong binder after finding what he needed so it didn’t look like someone had ransacked her work area...? Maybe? So if this is the case... Mr.Lam having the notebook would be a very interesting turn of events for everyone involved and again like any plot twist, there are SO many ways it could come back into the story😏.... Side note: If I’m wrong and completely off base, I’m very okay with that! I think that’s the fun in finding the courage to throw ideas out there and to grow and learn from what you think you understand, it’s humbling 😌 *slowly removes tin foil hat* Okay so this episode was incredible and I’m not going to deep dive into it because I already blabbed so much above. Some one mentioned the likeness of the layers of characters to onions previously in a thread and I can’t get the visual of Tora being a great big, bulky vidalia onion and Poppy being a cute little cipolinni onion out of my head(😆). They are both beautifully complex and layered characters who give off “perceived brute” and “perceived cute” vibes. We know from crumbs Lily has left through the series so far (and through her comments and musings here) that they both have an incredibly insightful understanding of how they function in their respective worlds and how they want to learn from what they have experienced thus far. We were just beginning to see how the hamster and tiger could perhaps coexist together in the wild, so obviously we’re crushed to see it come to a seemingly devastating end. From reading between the lines of what I’ve gathered from comments (Patreon readership and Lily’s alike) I think we all know we’re at the point where Tora is off to war like Ulaan went off in AB. He didn’t have the choice to stay with Poppy much like Ulaan didn’t have the choice to stay with Yuwa and he knows it’s going to be involved in such an incredibly dangerous clan war that he believes he’s perhaps never going to see her again because he knows the power of his part in the organization. Tora has always come across as intelligent, introspective and an often times calculating person to me. He’s an OG Ares Street King and he’s not the “Tiger of Ares Street” for nothing. Similar to how Ulaan fights with his soldiers but doesn’t seem to care for the nuances of reigning over people/having a harem of women to choose from: Tora will stand by the clan because it’s all he’s ever really known but he’s not going to fight so hard to “climb to the top” because he wants no real part of it... and the ladies? they’re fine but don’t truly fulfill him... the way Poppy(Yuwa) does😏 The parallels between MPL and AB are incredibly interesting and I think we’re at a point in the story where there’s going to be an immense amount of violence, personal growth and deeper connections between the complex web of characters and plot lines that have been expertly developed through the course of the series. Yes, I was sad at the end of this episode but I feel like this break was something readers of both series saw coming and I’m actually really exited and intrigued by how Lily is going to piece everything together! Lily, thank you for creating such a beautiful series. You’re incredibly thoughtful with everything you have shared with us as readers. Being a ceramic artist and having taken part in openings and critiques(crits) what you and your team produce to completion every week reminds me of how similar your episode releases are to holding a world wide virtual gallery opening/crit of your latest work every week and that’s pretty amazing! You get immediate, raw emotions, thoughtful interpretations, constructive and honest quips from fans and supporters of your work every single week, that’s so special! Your story, artwork aesthetic and attention to minute details are absolutely mind blowing. I never(coming into my mid 30’s now) thought I would read and get so enveloped in a Manga/Anime/comic series(forgive me I don’t know what you classify this as!) like I have with your work. This is the second ever online comic I’ve ever gotten into(Lore Olympus was 1st at the suggestion of a friend and then I very quickly came upon MPL- I’m a huge mythology/folklore/urban legend fiend, I devour those stories and this ticks those boxes!) because I’ve never really found other comics truly interesting or memorable (yes, I’m kind of a story and art snob but I think we all are to an extent, we all have different tastes and aesthetics). Lily, Thank you so much for creating such an engaging, complicated series for your readers, you’ve truly captivated thousands upon thousands of us with your words and art, you’re an artist in the truest sense of the word! 🙏🏼🐹❤️🐅🙏🏼 P.S. Sorry if that was too long! 😬 I often process my thoughts in a “stream-of-conscious-manner,” over analyze and much think too deeply about things and I think it’s part of being a maker. I’m always thinking about every little detail about why I’m making an object and for what purpose I am bringing it into the world. Intention, function, interaction and a viewers/users emotive responses to your creations are incredibly powerful things to think about when you bring your ideas to life. I know that can be perceived as “art head” or “cheesy” but I think it’s why I’m so drawn to this comic. Lily puts so much behind every single episode to benefit the greater story and I’m in absolute awe of how much it draws us all in. Art is deeply powerful. Again, this community is awesome and thank you all for letting me share my thoughts and thank you Lily for allowing yourself to be so open to all of us, that’s a truly honorable trait to have💛☺️ P.P.S. Don’t even get me started on the parallels of my very long/current LTR and this one here whew, maybe another time 😅💙

Sarah Snow

In an earlier comment I read on this thread, Rosemary Hunt pointed out the woman to Goliath's left in the photo from episode 11 where he is gambling. I finally got around to looking at it and this is what came to my mind. Analyzing the woman next to Goliath: 1. Damn it looks like she has red talons for nails. 2. What kind of flowers are on her dress? (I just listened to TigerPops podcast and the comment about koi fish on Yuwa's dress being related to Tora's tattoos stuck out to me.) 3. Her body position relative to Goliath seems domineering. Like an adult putting their hand on a child's shoulder to assert dominance, yet it's subtle unlike Vincent's behavior towards Tora. 4. Which got me thinking... Tora is 26 and Goliath seems younger than him in the teenager photo (episode 2). Is Goliath really such a genius that he had every clan boss wanting his loyalty before he was 26? Or is it more realistic he is the front for the actual badass genius? When trying to take out competition in a brutal man's world, mass deception would be super advantageous, especially for a woman. People are much more likely to trust a "genius" attractive young man than a brilliant attractive woman, and I think that would be even more true in the Mafia. I think this woman may be the one pulling Goliath's strings. 5. Going with the mass deception, behind the scenes, super boss theory, changing hair color, using colored contact lenses, plastic surgery, etc. would seem pretty standard. So I'm down for this woman being Poppy's mom. I'd love to see this woman be a total badass. 6. One more! Only 9 of her nails are showing in the picture. Her nails looked like talons to me on first impression but maybe it's a metaphor for Nine Daggers.

Cris

Please, please, can anybody tell me why Tora gives Poppy a ring and a paper plane? Is something about another chapter?? I am reading all the chapters again but I don´t find anything. If somebody can tell me i´ll be the happiest person in the world. I´m spanish, so sorry for all the mistakes. Thanks.

KIMBERLY CRETIN

Dear Lily, I just want to tell you that it's been 4 days, 23 hours and 40 minutes since I read the chapter and I'm still as devastated as in the beginning... I love you ❤️.

Elizabeth Fair

Congratulations on being #1 on WEBTOON today! Love this storyline and art. Absolutely genius character development and plot. Super excited for Friday 😄

Shona

❤❤ art was amazing as usual and the character development is just great not gonna lie had a tear at the end of this one.

aneuqinom

I haven’t felt this empty after reading or cried this much over something so beautiful in such a long time. These characters and this story means so much to me. Thank you Lily for all that you give to us! I can’t wait to see what else awaits Poppy & Tora 💖

Mariana Mahe

This epsode broke my heart... but again is simply flawless. 🥰

LaLaLauren

Wait....doesn’t that old aniki guy look like the one from that one secret garden where poppy mistakes Tora for him? It was Secret Garden 79+80, right??? Also, oh my god I wanted to cry. The bracelet and the ring. 🖤🖤🖤 BB

Pearl Thompson

Such a sweet episodes this was ☹️

TheGreatSabs

This episode was so fucking good. I'm not crying you're crying

Irene A

Another masterpiece. Such graphic mastery and storytelling genius. My heart cries for him.

Mookies

I love how throughout this episode, Tora’s arm/hand travels along Poppy’s shoulder and arm. He’s so comfortable with her and is such a gentleman I just think it’s a really tender thing.