Life's a Drag - Chapter 7 (Patreon)

Sarah groaned as she came through the front door.  “Thank God this day is finally over,” she said, kicking her shoes off by the door.  She walked barefoot into the living room and flapped down on the sofa.

“Rough day?” Chris asked as he poked his head out of his office.  Sarah gave a startled squeal and jumped.

“You have no idea,” she said as she straightened her skirt.  “You’re not going to guess in a million years who I ran into today.”

“Hmm,” he said thoughtfully as he came up behind the sofa and wrapped his arms around her.  “Marcus?” he asked.  Sarah laughed.

“Well, him too, but no.  Susan,” she said flatly.  Chris froze for a moment, and then slowly walked around the sofa to sit beside her.  

“What happened?” he asked.  He seemed to have no idea either, which made Sarah feel better that he at least wasn’t hiding this from her.

“Hell if I know,” Sarah said as she threw her hands up.  “I walked into my new Home Ec class, and there she was.  She’s a little older, and she cut her hair, but it was her.  I took off running.  Lucky the shop teacher Karmen caught me before I ran all the way to the parking lot.  They got me transferred to a different class.  How could she do this?” she sighed.  “No.  You know what, I don’t even care.  I don’t want to know.  As long as she stays out of my way.”

“Sarah, I’m so sorry,” Chris sighed.  “I had no idea.  I haven’t had any contact with your mother in eight years.”

“Eight?” Sarah paused, turning to look back at her father.  “Daddy, she left when I was 6.”

“I know Sport,” Chris nodded.  “Your mom...” he sighed.  “Susan had a serious addiction problem.  I mean really serious.  She hit rock bottom, went crazy and tried to kill herself.  She checked herself into rehab, and then dropped off the map.  The last thing she said to me was that she was sorry, that you deserved better.”

“That doesn’t explain what she’s doing at St Catherine’s though,” Sarah sighed.  “I mean that was years ago.  Who the hell knows how long she’s been living here in South Haven.”

“Probably hoping to someday see you.” Chris shrugged, “Who knows what Susan was thinking.”  He put his arms around Sarah and held her close.  She sighed, putting her head on his shoulder.  “I was going to surprise you tonight, but maybe it’s best if we cancel our reservations at Clover.  I think you’ve had enough surprises for one day.”

Sarah looked up at him again.  “Depends on whether it was a good surprise or a bad surprise.  On a scale of I can’t race anymore to Danica Patrick naked in my bedroom?” she teased.

Christopher laughed.  “Neither of those, that’s for sure,” he said.  “Um... Meghan and I have been dating for awhile now.  I’m not sure how it happened, really.  You work enough late nights with someone and you start to realize you’re more than just colleagues, or friends...” he sighed.  “I’ve been wanting to tell you for awhile, but then everything with finding out I had a daughter who can outrace veterans like Lorenzo happened.”  He laughed and hugged her again.

Sarah smiled a little.  It wasn’t a forced smile.  Just a tired one.  “That’s great, Dad.  Meghan is awesome.  Definitely stepmom material.”

Chris laughed at that.  “You think so?” he asked.  “Because I was thinking of possibly considering asking her to marry me, but since I hadn’t even told you we were dating yet, I didn’t want to just ambush you out of the blue.”

Sarah nodded.  “Definitely.  You shouldn’t let her get away just because you’re worried about hurting my feelings.  Even with Susan back in the picture, she lost the right to call me her daughter a long damn time ago.  Isabella Martin is ‘Mom’ to me, but Meghan is definitely a close second on the Mom figures,” she teased.  “I’ll go start getting ready for dinner.”

Christopher watched Sarah get up and walk upstairs.  He sighed and pulled out his smartphone, hitting Mike’s number.

“I just got an earful from Morgan,” Mike sighed.  “So if you’re going to yell at me too-”

“I’m not going to yell at you too,” Chris laughed.  “But I guess this blindsided you, too huh?”

“Like a friggen mack truck,” Mike sighed.  Chris could hear Mike’s office chair creak as he leaned back in it.  “Talk about seeing a ghost.  Morgan thinks I knew.  Chris I swear, I haven’t talked to Susan since she got out of rehab six years ago.”

“That’s two more than me,” Chris answered.  “I almost cancelled my dinner plans with Meghan and Sarah, but Sarah insisted we still go.  She thinks I should propose.”

“Smart girl,” Mike laughed.

“I had to tell her, about Meghan anyway.” Chris laughed.

“I’m going to poke around and try to find out what’s going on with Susan,” Mike said.  “I’ll let you know if I turn up anything.  Amy’s trying to calm Morgan down, but I honestly don’t blame her for being upset.  This was probably all just one massive coincidence.”

“According to Theresa she’s been around for almost a year actually.” Chris spoke. “I got the voice message before Sarah got home.  She’s going by Keston now so she must have gotten remarried.”

“Oh, damn,” Mike sighed.  “Talk about rubbing salt in the wound.  A whole year without saying anything to anyone.  Poor Sarah.  Alright.  Well, if that’s how she wants to play it, I’ll leave it alone for now, but I’m going to draw up papers for a restraining order just in case.  I don’t want to use them, but that’s not my decision to make.”

“Nope, that’s Sarah’s,” Chris answered.  “Thanks Mike,” he said as he hung up, looking up at Sarah, standing in the doorway to his office.  She was holding a short black dress on a hanger.

“What’s Sarah’s?” she asked.  “And is this too short for Clover?”

Chris laughed a bit.  “Um...” he said hesitantly.  “Not sure how I feel about my teenaged daughter wearing that anywhere,” he teased.  “I was talking to Mike about what happened today.  He didn’t know either, but he said that he’s going to draw up papers to request a restraining order, just in case.  That’s what I was telling him - that the decision would be yours, if it ever came to it.”

Sarah shook her head.  “No,” she answered.  “I don’t want anything to do with her right now, but if she has something to say to me, then I want her to be able to say it.  It’s not like she knew I was living as a girl now, let alone that I transferred to St. Catherine’s.”  She trailed off.  “I realize that now.  Marcus said there’s a lot more going on there.”  She shook her head.

“You’ve definitely grown up a lot.  I’m sorry I hadn’t been around a lot to see it.” Chris gave Sarah a hug before continuing.  “Now go put on that cute dress you had the other day.”

“That’s her fault too,” Sarah sighed, forcing back a sob.  Sarah had never cried so much in her life, as she had the last two weeks.  She nodded.  “The blue one with the cute belt,” she said, changing the subject back to clothes.  “Thanks for being so understanding Dad.  I know this hasn’t been easy on you either.  Not every day you find out your daughter is Racer Z,” she laughed a little, and turned to leave again.

By the time Meghan arrived at around 6, Sarah was still upstairs getting ready.  She sat at her new vanity working on her eye makeup.  She had used a hot iron to put some volume in her hair, and put in her nice fake diamonds earrings.  Meghan appeared in the doorway wearing a nice black evening gown and heels with her hair up.  She knocked gently on the open door.

“Your dad told me what happened today.  Are you sure you don’t want to reschedule?” she asked.  “We can have dinner any time.”

“Just don’t ask me if I want to talk about it,” Sarah laughed.  “I’ve done my mascara four times now.  Waterproof, my ass.”

Meghan laughed softly as she approached.  “I feel so bad Sarah.  We weren’t trying to keep our relationship a secret from you.  There just was never a ‘right’ time to say something.  Time got away from the both of us.”

Sarah turned in her chair and stepped into a pair of patent black 3” heels.  She leaned down to pull the dainty strap across and buckle them as she smiled up at Meghan.  “You’re not the only one that’s been keeping secrets though.  I mean this is different from Susan.  I overheard Dad tell Uncle Mike she’s been here an entire year, but at the same time, Marcus,  a guy from the club that I found out works security at the school told me there’s a lot more to it, so I’m just trying to process it all right now.”

Sarah got up and walked over to Meghan, giving her a hug.  “ If she wants to talk to me, I’ll let her, but as far as I’m concerned, Isabella is Mom, and you’re Stepmom,” she blurted out, paused, and then blushed a little.  “You know what I mean.”  She giggled, trying to cover up for just letting the cat out of the bag like that.

“Yeah,” Meghan laughed softly.  “I know what you mean.  You look amazing by the way.”

“Thanks, ‘Mom’,” Sarah giggled again.

~oOo~

“So there I was holding the leaking gas can, and Lisa is like, ‘Nobody strike a light’.  And Marcus walks by smoking a cigarette,” Sarah laughed.  They were on their way home from dinner after Chris had proposed to Meghan.  “Marcus points to the puddle around my feet and says ‘Is that gas?’ and I’m like yup.  He starts slowly backing away.  I haven’t seen him smoke since then.”

Meghan laughed as Sarah’s phone beeped with a new text message.  “You scared the nic fits out of him,” she teased.

‘OMG Sarah she’s here wat do? :( :( :(’ Morgan’s message read.

“Everything okay back there?” Chris asked, looking at Sarah in the rearview mirror.

“Um, yeah, fine,” Sarah answered, texting Morgan back.  ‘Who?’

‘Don’t make me type her name :(  U know who,’ Morgan texted back.

Sarah sighed.  ‘What does she want?’

‘Wanted to talk to Dad,’ Morgan texted back.  ‘Now Mom’s talking to her too.  They haven’t mentioned u.’

‘k I’ll call u when I get home,’ Sarah texted, putting her phone away.  She didn’t want to spoil the mood, so she smiled.  “Minor drama,” she said.  “No big.  So you’re breaking ground on a brand new building huh?”

“Yup,” Chris answered.  “We’re going to rent out a floor of another office building until then though.  With Muscle going primarily digital distro we don’t need to maintain a big corporate office anymore.”

Sarah fidgeted as she stared out the window.  It was only 7.  If she hurried she could get over to Morgan’s with plenty of time to spare.  As soon as they pulled into the driveway, Sarah hopped out.  “Can I go over to Morgan’s for a bit?” she asked sweetly.

“Don’t you want to change first?” Chris asked.  

Sarah shook her head.  “I probably won’t be gone long.  I’ll change when I get back.  Besides, the night’s young.  You two have a date to finish,” she teased as she ran inside to get her keys.  Meghan laughed.

“Well there is that new romantic comedy I’ve been wanting to see,” she teased.  Chris nodded.

“I’m just worried about Sarah,” he sighed as he backed out of the driveway again.

“I am too,” Meghan said.  “But she wouldn’t lie to you.  If she’s going over to see Morgan, than I believe her.”

“You’re right,” Chris said after a moment.  “I guess having Susan suddenly step back into her life, however unintentional, just has me on edge tonight.”  He leaned over and kissed her as they sat at the stop sign at the end of the street.  Meanwhile, Sarah had just caught up to them.  She honked her horn.

“It’s a stop sign, not a stop light,” she called, giving them a playful thumbs up and waving.as she put her bluetooth earpiece over her ear.  “Hey girl,” she said as Morgan picked up.  “I’m coming over.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Morgan asked.

“As far as she knows, I’m coming to see my girlfriend.  If I happen to learn something about why in fuck she’s been back in South Haven for a year and hasn’t tried to contact her best friend, let alone her firstborn daughter, that’s just a bonus.”

Morgan sighed.  “They’re downstairs in the living room.  Want me to tell them you’re coming?”

“No,” Sarah answered.  “I just got home from dinner at Clover.  I haven’t even changed clothes yet.  I’ve got a big surprise that I want to share with you.”

“In other words, you’d be coming over regardless, huh?” Morgan giggled.  “Can’t wait to see you,” she said, before they hung up, just as Sarah pulled into the driveway.  She stepped up out of the car, brushed her hair back, and walked up to the door to ring the doorbell.

Morgan only lived a couple of blocks away, in the same upscale neighborhood, so it wasn’t exactly far to drive.  Still, Sarah knew better than to be caught out after curfew - which thankfully wasn’t for another two hours.  Being in an auto club with a cop had its disadvantages, however small.

“I’ve never run from a challenge in my life,” she said to herself.  “I’ll be damned if I’m starting now.  I’m not like her.  I’ll never be a coward like her,” she stated to herself just before Amy opened the door.

“Oh, Sarah,” she said, surprised, and stepped outside, closing the door behind her.  “Now is really not a good time sweetie,” she said.  “I’ll just go ahead and say it.  Susan is here.”

“I don’t care,” Sarah answered.  “If she wants to talk to me, fine.  But today is the first time I’ve ever run from a problem.  I’m not going to run away from her again,” she answered calmly, but with a little venom in her words.  “I came to see Morgan.  I have some really exciting news that I didn’t want to tell her over the phone.”

Amy nodded, giving Sarah a hug.  “If you’re sure you’re okay with seeing Susan again, then come on inside.  Morgan’s eavesdropping at the top of the stairs.”

Sarah laughed quietly.  “I’m sorry I didn’t call you after what happened.  I was just on edge because I did run away...  I’m not going to be like her and run from my problems, though, so... Yeah.  I’m okay with seeing her again.”

Amy opened the door, and Sarah followed her inside.  Morgan walked up to Sarah from the hallway and hugged her.  “You look great.  Clover?” she asked even though she already knew the answer.  Sarah nodded, taking her hand.

“Yeah.  Dad and Meghan took me.  We’re celebrating finally moving the corporate office to South Haven,” Sarah said, pretending Susan wasn’t sitting just feet away from her, at least for a moment.  She then turned and looked right at Susan.  “I’m sorry I ran away from you this morning.  It’s just you were the last person I ever expected to see again.”

Susan nodded her head.  “I’m sorry for not telling you I came back.  I thought teaching at an all girls school, I wouldn’t run into you until I figured things out - what to say, or even if you wanted anything to do with me again.”  She sighed.  “I should go,” she said as she started to stand.

Sarah held up her hand.  “Don’t leave on my account.  Amy told me you’re uncle Mike’s best friend.  I’m sure you’ve got a lot of catching up to do,” she said as she approached Susan, who was still standing next to the sofa. 

“I’m not letting you run away from this,” Sarah said quietly.  “You ran away once, and fell off the map for most of my life, but if it hadn’t been for that, I wouldn’t have had time to discover my true self.  I don’t hate you.  I just don’t trust you.”

Susan nodded.  “What I did to you was inexcusable.  No amount of ‘I’m sorry’ will ever set it right, but I am so proud of the beautiful young woman you’ve become, despite the horrible mother I was, for whatever that’s worth.”

Sarah nodded.  “Believe it or not, that’s worth a lot.  Dad told me about your addiction problem, and that you tried to kill yourself.  You’re right.  It was inexcusable.  But it’s not unforgivable,” she said, and then surprised everyone, especially Susan, when she gave her a light hug.  

“You and I need to talk some time, about a lot of things.  But you came over to talk to Mike and Amy, and I came over to see my girlfriend.”  She smiled as she stepped back again, turning to take Morgan’s hand as they walked upstairs.

Susan sank back into the sofa slowly, not realizing Sarah was listening by the door still.  “I swear, if I did one thing right in my entire life, it was that young lady.  That’s the second time today that I expected the worst, and that she’s surprised me.  She’s a better person than I am,” she sighed.

“She’s grown up strong and independent,” Amy said as Sarah quietly edged away from the door to follow Morgan upstairs.

“Admit it,” Morgan giggled quietly.

“What?” Sarah asked.

“You enjoyed that,” Morgan answered.  Sarah shrugged, but nodded.

“I’ve never run away from anyone or anything in my life, as Sarah.  I came right out and told Amy I was a girl.  Hell, I’ve kicked Kevin in the nuts on more than one occasion.  I wasn’t about to let my fear control me this time.  And I really did want to come see you,” she added with a giggle.  “The thing about the corporate office wasn’t the real big news.”

“Oh?” Morgan asked as she led Sarah into her bedroom.  It was exactly like Sarah remembered it, and a complete estrogen zone, with frilly bedcovers and curtains, sharply contrasted by the huge Forza 5 poster on one wall, surrounded by photos and posters of fast cars decorating it and the other walls.

Sarah nodded.  “Daddy finally proposed to Meghan.  I’m getting a new stepmom,” Sarah giggled.

“Awww, that’s so sweet!” Morgan giggled.  “I like Meghan, too.  I mean I’ve only met her a handful of times through my Dad, but she seems like a real badass lady.”

“So, honest answer,” Sarah said as she sat on Morgan’s bed.  “Are you okay?  I know you were more upset at Susan than I was.  I was just.. I wasn’t upset.  I was freaked out.”

Morgan nodded as she sat down and hugged Sarah.  “I’m okay,” she answered.  “I was upset that she upset you, like a knee jerk, gut reaction to seeing someone I love in pain.  But I apologized to Dad for yelling at him about her before she showed up.  Mom made me realize he didn’t know what the hell was going on either.  Nobody did.”

“Been clean since I entered rehab,” Susan spoke up from the doorway.  “I never tried to contact Michael or Christopher because I was ashamed of the pain I had caused, and I was afraid of causing more pain.  I took the job at St. Catherine’s because I was finally ready to come back to South Haven, but every time I reached out, Mike and Chris were always busy.”

“You could have left a message,” Sarah sighed, shaking her head.

“No, I couldn’t,” Susan answered.  “Can you imagine how Chris would’ve reacted to his secretary telling him his estranged ex-wife called?  No, it was something that I had to do face to face.”

Sarah snorted.  “I know exactly how he would’ve reacted.  He’s been looking for you for nine fucking years, Susan,” she said as she stood up.  “Nine years later we still talk about you; I wondered why you left, if I had done something wrong, or if we just weren’t good enough for you.”

She had by now crossed the room and was standing toe to toe with her mother, looking her right in the eye.  Susan shook her head.

“I don’t know what else I can say.  I was young and stupid, and I prayed every night that my baby wouldn’t grow up and make the same stupid choices that I made, but at the same time I was afraid to come back because I just knew you hated me.”  She turned to leave, but Sarah grabbed her hand.

“I’m not letting you walk away from this,” Sarah said sternly.  Susan turned to look back at her, questioning.  “I don’t hate you.  I NEVER hated you.  You’re my Mother for God’s sakes.  Mother is God in the eyes of a child,” she said more softly.  “But if you want a relationship with me, you’re going to have to earn it, starting right now.”  She actually cracked a small smile.  “Because I want one.”

Susan nodded her head.  “What do you want me to do?” she asked.

“I don’t want anything material,” Sarah answered.  “What I want from you is a promise that you will never, ever abandon me again.  If you don’t want to talk to me, you’ll tell me.  If you’re having a bad day and can’t deal with me, tell me.  I want honesty.  That’s all.”

“Sarah, I would never... will never shut you out just because I’m having a bad day,” Susan answered.  “I know that’s just one more thing I’ll have to prove to you.  But I want a promise in return.  I want you to promise me that you will never become a slave to addiction and hurt the people you love.  That’s the one, the only thing I will ever expect of you.”

Sarah cracked a smile again and nodded.  “Drugs are for cowards who can’t handle reality.  No offense.”  She paused.  “No, actually, I do mean some offense.”

Susan laughed.  “I do love you Sarah.  So much so that I asked Rayne to give me a general idea of where you’d be throughout the school day so I could stay out of your way.”

“Don’t do that,” Sarah said, shaking her head.  “Don’t walk on eggshells.  Don’t avoid me.  Just be you, and I’ll be me, and maybe with time, we can meet in the middle.  I want to give you another chance - whether you or Mike, or Morgan, or Daddy or the Pope thinks you deserve it or not, I think you do.”

Susan smiled a little, tearing up as she handed Sarah a post-it with a set of phone numbers on it.  “I really only came up here to give this to you,” she said, a little more self-assured now.  “You said we needed to talk sometime, so this is how you can reach me, so we can set something up.”

Sarah nodded and gave Susan another light hug.  “I think we just did.  Let’s go talk to my therapist really fast.  She’s downstairs,” she said with a small giggle in her voice.  

Susan followed her downstairs, unsure of what this was about, but Amy was waiting at the foot of the stairs for them.  Sarah hugged her more tightly than she had Susan.  “Aunt Amy?  You know that whole doctor patient confidentiality thing?”

Amy nodded.  “You want me to add Susan to your list of confidants right?” she asked.  Sarah nodded.

“You already tell Uncle Mike and Dad everything anyway,” she teased.  “But I realize seeing me today at St. C’s was as much a shock for her as it was for me, and... she’s probably got tons of questions that I’m just not equipped to answer right now.  But you are.  I’d really like it if you’d be our mediator going forward, if that’s okay with Susan,” she said, looking to her mother.

“Oh, of course,” Susan answered immediately.  

“Of course,” Amy answered.  “Why don’t we set something up for this Friday afternoon?”

“We can use one of the school’s meeting rooms,” Susan offered.  “It would be neutral ground for us all I think.”

“That’s actually a really good idea,” Sarah answered, turning to Morgan.  “Walk me to the door?” she asked.  Morgan giggled.

“Sure,” she answered, and the pair stepped away.

“Sorry things got kind of weird tonight,” Sarah said as they reached the door.  She hugged Morgan tightly.  “Ever since I started the hormone thing, my emotions have been out of control,” she sighed.

“That just means you’re human,” Morgan answered as she cupped Sarah’s face in her hands.  “You don’t have to apologize for anything.  Just keep being you, the girl I love.”  She pressed her lips to Sarah’s softly.  

Sarah smiled fondly back at her before stepping out.  It was beginning to get dark, but she still had an hour before her 9pm curfew.  She jumped in the car, looking over at her empty passenger seat.

“Don’t know if I really do have an angel riding with me when I get behind the wheel, or if it’s just superstition,” she said to the empty seat.  “But just in case... Thanks for having my back in there.”

There was no heavenly choir, no bright lights or harps, not that she expected any of that, and in truth it probably would have caused her to drive right through the Morgans’ garage door anyway as she had already started the car, backing out of the driveway to head home.