A Big Ol' Swing (Chapter News) (Patreon)

When I was young, my cousins came to town and we went to the local fields to play some football. We had a lovely old time until the youngest cousin awarded himself a penalty kick.

Now this little guy - let's call him Pascal - was about eight inches high. The ball loomed over him. But while he was little, he had learned one important lesson in his brief life. That lesson was that if you wanted to kick the ball hard you needed to take a huge run up.

So he placed the ball on the penalty spot and retreated. And retreated. We all stared with astonishment as he strode, purposefully, all the way to the half way line. There he turned, full of grim determination, and rushed - tongue out - towards the ball.

He ran. And ran. Every part of him pumping and popping and dropping but not stopping. Every part of him intending to kick the s out of that ball. This was to be the definitive penalty kick of all time.

Three inches away from his target he ran out of steam and collapsed in an ungodly heap, nudging the ball about two rotations forward. He was too tired to even respond to our laughter. It was, and remains, one of the funniest things I have ever witnessed. If I wrote it in Player Manager you would mutiny, saying I had gone too far and that I had abandoned realism completely. Demons? Imps? Sure. A kid taking a forty-yard run up and being unable to kick the ball? Get stuffed, Ted Steel.

About an hour ago I was wondering why I didn't like the first 6,000 words of my latest chapter. Those words are good and charming. But I realised I wasn't taking a big enough run up. I want to completely rewrite it from a different perspective and while I could do that tomorrow, I'd end up as a total husk and have to skip Monday. So why not skip Friday and give you something seriously beefy and succulent on Monday? Instead of something rushed? Makes sense, right?

As I was thinking that, my publishers asked me to check the final proofs for book 3 on a fairly tight deadline. I love overdelivering and hate missing deadlines but that seems like a sign.

TL;DR:

No T3 chapter this Friday. (I'll post Tiers 1 and 2 and on Royal Road, but they won't get one on Monday so it'll even out.)

I don't want to make a big drama out of every rewrite or delay, but this one hits home for some reason. I can't promise that by delaying from Friday to Monday you'll like it, but I can promise that I'll have taken the biggest swing at it imaginable. It might still turn out shit but mate, I'm plonking that ball down and walking ALL the way back. If I fall flat on my face, at least it'll be funny.

See you on Monday. Roar!