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50: Wild Ass Celebrity Rumors [VIDEO] (Patreon)

Published:
2024-01-15 12:01:01
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

The lads discuss some of the juiciest, most wildest celebrity rumors going on around Hollywood. Celebrities discussed: Taylor Swift, Julia Roberts, Andrew Garfield, Kanye West, Matt Damon and MORE!

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Comments

Jacob Leiser

Well lads I think this is your 100th ep including Patreon ones so I gathered a list of 100 moments that gave me joy. They’re in the thread of this comment and I’ll also post on the YT so any newbies can see what they’ve missed out on.

Jacob Leiser
>>127029073

100 moments from Joy Tactics that brought me joy (in no particular order and mostly with no context): 1. “Jeeter gave me herpies!” 2. “Let me do the Willie Wonka and the pharmaceutical industry. The Wonka family kinda like the Sackler family but they do cool chocolate. I love chocolate. Hmmm. Do you guys like chocolate?” - “You just air bended the conversation in a crazy way.” 3. Hearing “yesterdaaay” flying past in a sports car. 4. Jack’s shock at hearing about red bull and milk - “That’s gonna curdle, that’s gonna curdle!” 5. “You guys taking about brain slushee?” 6. “The sub-dermal fidget spinner.” 7. “Hits from tha bubbla.” 8. Nate being a paramotoring terrorist aka “the pararist”. 9. Jack taking a pause to go puke. 10. Eric saying he has neanderthal dna cos of how he goes crazy he goes on the battle ropes at the gym. 11. Being a needle-ific tongue assassin - “Go up to a senator *heh* right in the neck.” 12. Nate’s xmen power is have explodable eyeballs - “You only get two shots.” 13. Nate describing his bald mullet as “Empty lot in the front, party in the back.” 14. The voice mods on the weed ep. 15. Sexually role playing as stand up specials. 16. “Whoever has the most busted room, we’ll pray for you… for an hour.” 17. “Here’s the thing about crickets, you think the cricket sound means boring but if i was doing a set for a group of crickets, that would mean i’m crushing.” 18. Nate’s bedside manner as a doctor. 19. What yous think black holes sound like. 20. Jack setting up a hypothetical scenario where a dog bits Nate’s leg and Eric says “Then you start nutting outta control.” 21. “You know how they spell authenticity in 2023? s-w-a-g… swag!” 22. What we should send into space in 2023 - “Half a bottle of acai XXX Vitamin Water, a pink pistol, 24hrs of MTV2 from the early 2000s and Ryan Reynolds cryogenically frozen.” 23. “A mystery is a story people don’t know the answer to.” 24. “What’s the point of looking like anything, when you can look like everything?” 25. Jack trying to come up with anagrams of Lars Mitank - “Tarantula Milk.” 26. The Department of Defence used to be the Department of Kickflips back in my day. 27. “No-one can break into Eric’s house.” - “You know Ring cameras right? I’ve got two of em!” 28. “You used the word execution. Is there a word ecution or cution? What makes it ex?” 29. If everything had flesh on it, i would be fucking the shit out of everything in my house. That’s the only thing stopping me sticking my dick in a fucking window or a painting, is some skiyn.” 30. “I want to go to Australia’s tallest building and fucking jump off of it and kill meself.” - “All right, I want to go to Australia’s deepest cave and jump out it and kill myself somehow that way.” 31. Nate getting a fright from the speaker and grabbing his gf to use as a human shield. 32. “The belly-up guillotine.” 33. “Sucked up, fucked up, tryna get my nuts touched.” 34. “I’m a people pleaser but i’m also a people destroyer if you fuck with me.” 35. Jack being Evel Knievel conversationally. 36. “Is an angel an animal?” 37. Jack’s demonic latin. 38. “What do you mean the elements? Earth, wind, fire, water and magnesium?” 39. “Jack you need a consultation with almighty God, the creator of the universe” 40. “Do you guys think i should just have a dead snake on me at all times that i just kind of whip at people?” 41. Nate’s french freestyling 42. Lonnie 43. “When I saw that sistine chapel, I started crumping immediately.” 44. “Could you guys imagine dunking on a priest?” 45. The guy at the sports shop thinking he knew Eric from his voice on a thank call. 46. Jack’s version of the Cain and Abel story. 47. “Eric has been white in all of his past lives.” 48. “Getting ya bootie flipped on the battlefield.” 49. “I can’t think of anything more different. Water, magma and… isosceles triangles?” 50. Nate saying he can’t hear Eric when he’s doing his low, quiet, serious whisper voice. 51. “Remember when they foreclosed on houses cos of the housing bubble popping?” - “Yeah trust me, I was closing them. I was a child forecloser.” 52. The sounds you made while receiving a prediction. 53. “We need to talk about some of the couples that everyone in the public looks up to like Jay Z and Beyonce.” - “Ariel and that French painter.” 54. “You go back in time and everyone thinks you’re gonna kill Hitler but you were just riding Einstein’s face.” 55. “Lebanese Tiger Woods has never been a descriptor of anyone ever, you just broke new ground.” 56. “Record deal… I’m tempted to unleash my full brain power on this topic.” - “No you can’t Jack, you’ll die. “- “I think I have to, fuck! Record deal. Okay let me reorganise the letters… blrhjaldprheb… decor dale… lead decor.” 57. “I’m pretty sure Michael Buble doesn’t have an American accent, he just sings… like a slice of cheeeeese.” 58. “Going back to the 50s singing Thotiana, doing the worm.” 59. Nate has huge sweat pits - “You look like a car salesman at the end of the month and you’ve sold not one car” 60. “Chess 4: The Pawn Chronicles” 61. “What i feel every time i see a horse: mystery, astoundment, not knowing what they’re thinking, wishing i could know what they thought.” 62. “I need a one dance, shot of hennesey and Vyvanse” 63. Having a ramen pack instead of a cyanide tooth so that when you get waterboarded you can make soup. 64. Jack at school spelling grasshopper ‘grupper’ then a boy standing on a table and pulling his trousers down. 65. “Standing in front of a fan saying bbbaaalleeeggggnaaa.” 66. Jack scratching his face cos he didn’t want to go to work and telling them a cat attacked him. 67. The thank call where Jack mentioned that he was on The Bear. 68. “If fenti sponsored all of us… you think… people would like that?” 69. Eric getting bodyguards and making them dress as modern angels and play video games with him. 70. Jack’s plans to involve lettuce in his proposal. 71. Eric pulling his hamstring. 72. The Joy Tactics Nascar sponsors - Vyvanse and Twizzlers. 73. “I’m gonna die in a crazy accident and it’s gonna put a warning label on socks.” 74. “Polio is a gene accident.” 75. Did you hear how Eric died? He cracked his knuckles and thought he felt it in his leg then started hyperventilating and just thought himself into being dead.” 76. Nate saying his name is “Maef” on a thank call. 77. “Evolve Fitness Ridgewood, you can come there and try and assassinate me and I swear to god I’ll take a plate and smack it in your face.” 78. “I know we promised no ads ever on this podcast. We’ll never have ads, ever. We’ll never bow down to an advertising agency. Unless the money is pretty good, unless it’s decent.” 79. The Joy Tactics parody of the Happy song which was a roast of someone that sent a negative comment about the podcast. 80. Nate doing his Six Flags haunter audition at the top of his voice in the business centre of a hotel. 81. “Instead of Jumanji 17 it should be called James Elvis.” 82. Referring to non-bald people as ‘haired’. 83. Nate doing the splits off screen on the Zoom - “With his thang hanging down resting in a bucket of iced cbd oil” 84. “Usually when someone comes up to me and says they love Joy Tactics, they’re not doing well.” - “They’re soaking wet regardless of the weather.” 85. Testing how many words yous could say in 10 seconds and Nate started saying ‘lalalala’ after about 5 words. 86. “If you guys are saying the greek gods aren’t real then shut the podcast off right now.” 87. “The Megalodonk” 88. Coming up with the word misty then forgetting to ever use it again. 89. “For the next week, we’re gonna do the be nice challenge. Usually people are coming up to us and we’re smacking them in the face and littering in people’s homes.” 90. “I should burn the poster of brad pitt, I’m just waiting for the right fire.” 91. “In good news today, you’re not the beloved man that died by suicide.” 92. “Are you saying my type is someone that can’t read and isn’t suave?” 93. The Girl is Mine karaoke. 94. “You go downstairs on Christmas day and what do you see? Is it daddy going down on Santa Claus, showing him his new tricks?” 95. Shower gel being so multi-purpose that it’s also a shirt. 96. Jack having a couple bugs crawling out of him in one of the Martha’s Vineyard eps. 97. Nate palming Rachel’s head. 98. The saga of the fly that Jack saved from the toilet and later landed on Eric’s face. 99. Jack’s threat in Spanish to the person that hacked Nate’s Netflix. 100. Eric finding out on the pod that he had to check out his hotel room.

Jacob Leiser
>>127029073

Hmm it’s saying “Something went wrong” went I try and post, any idea what the issue could be?

Alex Johl

eric & jack - your sets at the idgafology were the funniest things ive seen in a while. was looking forward to it at all month and it delivered