GUARD THY GULLET: DROW BANQUETS (Patreon)

GUARD THY GULLET
A Drow Banquet In All Its Splendor

Many times I’ve been asked about what food drow eat, and what delicacies and treats they feast on when they gather for special meals. The fungi-dominated everyday fare I’ve covered many times down the years, but not so the “special food for special occasions,” so it’s finally time to explore drow banquets.

Don’t listen on an empty stomach; if you’re hungry, or could soon be, go devour something. I’ll wait with utter patience; it’s something we do, we images caught in the Internet.

Right, ready?

Consider then this menu, from a banquet thrown by House Claddath of the drow city of Haundrauth. It consists of six traditional courses: The Fore, Vaedrence, Trelvurr, Qonthlo, Laerazss, and Tearel.

• The Fore

• Thalspiders on armor plates

• Crunchfingers

• Blackthrips

• Roast Thuldur bites

• Farramber

Translated, that first course menu means: Arrival and Mingling (general chatter)

Thalspiders on armor plates (faux spiders fashioned of pitted black olives from the World Above for the bodies, and fungi for the legs, posed on crackers of the thinnest shelf fungus, cut into ovals and rock salted around the edges)

Crunchfingers (deep-fried—in frillstalk fungi oil—cave crickets)

Blackthrips (glistening black cave worms, stuck alive to cave fisher web-daubs, to be plucked therefrom and eaten wriggling and fresh—they move like lightning, so will escape if dropped)

Thuldur is the local Haundrauthan name for the pack.............

**Please find the full script attached in .txt and .docx formats