Fairy Tale Gamer Chapter 1 — Congratulations, You’re Dead (Patreon)

Eddy Marsh had exactly one rule he lived his life by, and that rule was that there was always an angle, always a play, always some way to come out on top if you were clever enough and didn't mind bending the truth until, and for eighteen years that rule had served him pretty well, all things considered, right up until the moment it got him killed.

He had been running a fairly straightforward con on a guy named Pruitt who owed money to people who were not the sort of people you wanted to owe money to, and the plan, which had seemed like a genuinely good plan at the time, was to convince Pruitt that Eddy could get him out of the city before the collectors caught up with him, in exchange for a modest fee and Pruitt's car, which Eddy had every intention of selling the second they crossed the state line. 

It was not a kind plan. 

It was not even a particularly good plan. 

But somewhere in the middle of executing it, while they were sitting in a diner at two in the morning going over the details, three large men in cheap suits had walked through the door looking for exactly the man sitting across from Eddy in the booth, and Eddy, for reasons that he genuinely could not explain even to himself in the seconds before he died, had stood up, put himself between Pruitt and the men with the guns, and said something along the lines of "come on now, fellas, there's no need for this" in the most reasonable voice he could manage.

It had not worked. 

It had, in fact, gone about as poorly as it possibly could have gone, and Eddy's last conscious thought on Earth, as he felt something punch through his chest before the diner tilted sideways, was that he really should have just let Pruitt get shot, because Pruitt was a deadbeat who owed Eddy money too, and dying for a guy who owed you money was, in the grand scheme of stupid decisions Eddy had made in his life, somehow managing to take first place.

And then there was nothing, which made sense, because that's generally what happens after you die.  Eddy was not expecting anything else to happen, and so it came as something of a surprise when he opened his eyes again and found himself looking up at a sky.

It was not the ceiling of the diner, It was not the inside of a coffin, or a hospital room, or anything resembling the various scenarios that Eddy, might have vaguely pictured. 

It was just sky and Eddy lay there on his back for a solid ten seconds just blinking up at it before his brain caught up with the rest of him. "Okay," Eddy said out loud.  He pushed himself up onto his elbows, and the motion sent a wave of dizziness through his skull that made the sky tilt and swim for a moment before settling. 

"Okay," he said again, slower this time. "Okay. So. I got shot, and now I'm in a field?"

"I gotta be honest with you, whoever's listening, this whole thing has the energy of a really elaborate prank, and if it is a prank, I would like to formally request that whoever's running it lets me in on the joke now, because I've had kind of a rough night."

Nobody answered him. 

"Although—" he continued, getting to his feet slowly and patting himself down, checking his chest where the bullet should have gone in, finding nothing, no hole, no blood, no scar, nothing but his own shirt, which was not even the shirt he'd been wearing in the diner, it was some kind of plain linen thing that looked like it belonged in a Renaissance fair. 

"—if this is heaven, I gotta say, I'm a little underwhelmed... I was kind of expecting clouds and harps and maybe my grandmother showing up to tell me she's disappointed in me one more."

It was at that exact moment, while Eddy was still patting down his unfamiliar shirt and trying to figure out whether the pants were also new and also unfamiliar, which they were, that the air in front of him shimmered very slightly.

[WELCOME, HERO.]

Eddy stared at it.

He stared at it for a genuinely long time, long enough that a bird landed on a nearby branch and took a dump and left. "What the fuck," Eddy finally said. 

[Congratulations. You have been selected to become this world's Hero. ]

"Okay, no, hold on, hold on, what the fuck," Eddy said, stepping backward. "What do you mean selected, selected for what, I didn't sign up for shit. Besides I don't know what kind of hero material you think you're working with here, I once convinced a guy his car had been possessed by the ghost of his dead aunt so he'd sell it to me for two hundred dollars."

[ The system does not make errors. ]

"Oh, it talks back," Eddy said, and despite the fact that he was currently having what was almost certainly the strangest experience of either his life or his death, something in him relaxed slightly at the discovery that whatever this thing was, it could apparently hold a conversation.

[ The system has been monitoring your timeline for the appropriate window of opportunity to extract a candidate. Your death, while unfortunate, occurred at a moment that aligned with the system's criteria. You will now be briefed. Please do not interrupt. ]

"I feel like that's a big ask," Eddy said with a deep breath.

[ You currently stand in the world of Albion, a realm where the stories of countless worlds have converged into one. ]

[ Darkness has been permitted to roam unchecked for some time. Tyrants hold thrones that were never theirs to hold. Curses linger that were never broken. Monsters that should have been slain in their stories continue to hunt in this one. The balance that should exist between good and evil has tipped. ]

[ This makes Albion, at present, an ideal environment for the emergence of a Hero. ]

Eddy read the words as they appeared, his eyebrows climbing higher on his forehead with each new line, and by the time the system had finished he had crossed his arms over his chest. "Okay, so let me make sure I'm following you here," Eddy said, "You need me to go around swinging a sword and shit and being a hero to a word of shit heads snd bad guys, sounds simple enough but I think there might be a mismatch in your candidate profile, because what you're describing sounds like it requires somebody with, you know, actual hero qualities, somebody who runs into burning buildings, somebody who, I don't know, helps old ladies cross the street without trying to lift their purse while they're not looking, my point is, I don't think I'm your guy."

[ The system has already accounted for this. ]

"Of course it has."

[ A Hero is not defined by the absence of flaws. A Hero is created by the struggles he endures and the choices he makes in spite of them. This is why the system will not provide what is colloquially known among certain other realities as a "gamer's body" or a "gamer's mind." You will not become emotionally detached from your circumstances. You will feel fear. You will feel pain. You will feel grief, frustration, exhaustion, and doubt, the same as any other person, this will prove effective in help forging you into a hero. ]

Eddy stood there for a moment letting that sink in, and something about the phrasing made his stomach do a small uncomfortable flip that had nothing to do with the fact that he'd recently died.

"So just to clarify," Eddy said "you're telling me I don't get to just, like, flip a switch and stop caring about stuff. I don't get the detached numb guy experience where everything's just stats and I don't feel bad when bad things happen. You're telling me this is gonna actually suck."

[ Yes. ]

"Great," Eddy said. "Really glad we cleared that up. So what exactly do I get, then, if I don't get the easy mode?"

[ You have been granted access to the Hero System. This system tracks your growth across three disciplines: STRENGTH, the body; SKILL, the hands, the trained craft, and the mind; and WILL, the soul, encompassing magic in its many broad forms. ]

[ You gain Experience through combat, through the completion of quests, through acts of significance both heroic and villainous, and through simple survival in a world that does not forgive carelessness. Experience accumulates toward Levels. Levels grant Points. Points may be spent to learn new abilities or to deepen the ones you already possess. ]

[ Abilities exist in tiers. The first tier is earned through investment of points. Further tiers require more points, the cost of that investment doubles with each tier reached. Alternatively, abilities may be developed through dedicated practice over time, without the expenditure of Points, although this method is considerably slower, and the rarer an ability, the longer that road becomes. ]

[ A separate category, known as Hero Arts, represents the truest expression of what it means to carry this power. These are not common skills. They are not learned from a teacher or practiced. They are the inheritance of the role you have accepted, and they are both rare and costly, but they are also, when fully grown, extraordinary beyond anything an ordinary man or woman could achieve. ]

Eddy had been nodding along to most of this in the vague, slightly glassy-eyed way that people nod along to instructions they don't fully understand, but at the phrase "the inheritance of the role you have accepted," something in him snagged, and he held up a hand, palm out, like he was stopping traffic.

"Whoa, whoa, hold on, back up, back up to that part," Eddy said. "Role I accepted. I haven't accepted anything. Nobody asked me if I wanted to accept a role, you just started talking at me the second I opened my eyes."

[ You did not consent to die in that diner either, and yet you did, and the world continued regardless of your consent. The system extends you a courtesy that the universe at large generally does not. ]

"...Okay, that's fair," Eddy admitted, deflating slightly.

[ Furthermore, the system would like to clarify a point of frequent confusion. Despite being named the Hero System, and despite having selected you for the role of Hero, you are not bound to walk a path of heroism. The road ahead is yours to choose. You may use the power granted to you to protect, to heal, to stand between the innocent and those who would harm them. You may equally use it to take, to rule, to become the very darkness this world requires someone to oppose. The system does not compel virtue. It only provides opportunity. What you build from that opportunity is entirely your own affair. ]

Eddy blinked at that one, his head tilting slightly to the side, "Huh," Eddy said. "Okay, see, now you're speaking my language a little bit. So what you're telling me is, hypothetically, if I wanted to use whatever powers you're handing out to, say, run the single greatest, most elaborate, most beautifully constructed grift in the history of any world, that's technically on the table."

[ The system does not recommend this path, but it does not forbid it either. ]

Eddy rubbed a hand across the back of his neck, looking around at the field again, at the rolling grass and the distant tree line and the morning light. "Nice..." he muttered with a grin on his face. 

[ The system will now provide your starting allotment. ]

[ STARTING POINTS AWARDED: 10 ]

[ These points may be spent immediately, or saved for later use. The choice, as with all things, is yours. ]

Eddy looked at the number floating there and felt a strange little flicker of something that might have been excitement. This was a new world and a new chance to live and hopefully have a bigger life than the shithole one eh had came from.

"Ten points," Eddy repeated slowly, turning the number over in his head like he was appraising a watch. "Okay. Ten points. What do I get with it?" He paused, frowning slightly."

[ Your interface will respond to direct thought and intention. Simply will it open, and it shall open. ]

"Will it open..." Eddy closed his eyes for a second, feeling distinctly foolish, and he thought, with as much conviction as he could muster, open, and somewhere behind his eyelids the world lit up.

[ STATUS ]

NAME: Edward Marsh

TITLE: None

LEVEL: 1

AGE: 18

FAME: Unknown

XP: 0 / 100

UNSPENT POINTS: 10

STRENGTH — no abilities learned

SKILL — no abilities learned

WILL — no abilities learned

HERO ARTS — locked

"Huh," Eddy said again, quieter this time, looking at his own name floating in the air in front of him like it was the strangest, most personal piece of evidence he'd ever been handed. "Huh. Okay. That's. Yeah. That's really happening."

[ The system congratulates you on the beginning of your new life. ]

"Thanks," Eddy said, a little distracted, still turning his head slightly to watch the window track with his vision, the way it stayed perfectly positioned no matter how he moved. "Thanks, I, uh. I appreciate that. I think."

[ The town of Wall lies several miles to the south of your current position. The system recommends you travel there, as it is the nearest settlement, and a new life is generally easier to begin with walls around it and a roof over one's head, rather than alone in an open field. ]

"Wall," Eddy said, "I've heard of worse named places..."

[ The system wishes you well on your journey, and once again offers its congratulations on your new life. ]

Eddy stood there for a long moment.  "Well," Eddy said, "no sense standing around in a field talking to myself. Let's go see what kind of trouble this place has to offer." And with that, he started walking south, hands in his pockets, heading toward a town called wall.

...

The walk south was pleasant enough, if you ignored the fact that the person doing the walking had no idea where he actually was, no money, no food, no weapon, and no plan beyond "go to the town called Wall and figure it out from there," which, to be fair, was more of a plan than Eddy had operated with on several previous occasions in his life, so he wasn't too worried about it.

The field gave way to a dirt road after about ten minutes of walking through knee-high grass. The road was narrow and clearly hadn't seen maintenance in a while, but it pointed south and that was good enough. He had been walking for maybe five minutes when the curiosity got the better of him.

"Okay," he said out loud. "Let's see what we're working with here."

He focused, willing the interface open, and the status window bloomed into his vision again. 

[ STATUS ]

NAME: Edward Marsh

TITLE: None

LEVEL: 1

AGE: 18

FAME: Unknown

XP: 0 / 100

UNSPENT POINTS: 10

STRENGTH — no abilities learned

SKILL — no abilities learned

WILL — no abilities learned

HERO ARTS — locked

"Right let's see if we can't figure this out," Eddy said. He looked at the STRENGTH header and thought about it and the header expanded.

What unfolded beneath it was a list. 

[ STRENGTH ]

Strength — ○○○○○○○○○○

Toughness — ○○○○○○○○○○

Endurance — ○○○○○○○○○○

Regeneration — ○○○○○○○○○○

Constitution — ○○○○○○○○○○

Raw Speed — ○○○○○○○○○○

Lung Capacity — ○○○○○○○○○○

Pain Tolerance — ○○○○○○○○○○

Recovery — ○○○○○○○○○○

Metabolism — ○○○○○○○○○○

"Huh," Eddy said, slowing his walk slightly as he read down the list. "Okay, so Strength is just... body stuff that makes me tougher, stronger, faster... I guess it beats going to the gym for like five years." He tilted his head, reading the entries again. "Enhanced Strength, Toughness, Raw Speed, Regeneration... I mean, that's all useful... how the hell am I supposed to choose."

He focused on Strength specifically, thinking more, and a small tooltip expanded beneath it.

[ STRENGTH — Tier I ]

Raw physical power. Increases base lifting, striking, and pushing force.

Current: ○○○○○○○○○○ (0/10)

At 10/10: Evolves to Tier II — MIGHTY STRENGTH

Tier II: ○○○○○○○○○○ (0/10) — cost per point doubles

At 10/10: Evolves to Tier III — TITAN'S MIGHT

"So every ten points I fill in, the skill levels up and the next ten cost twice as much," Eddy muttered, doing the math in his head. "So the first ten are cheap, the next ten cost double, the next ten after that cost double again... yeah, okay, that's a curve that gets ugly fast. Getting to the top of anything is going to cost a stupid amount of points." He chewed on that for a second. "Good thing I only have ten. Can't overspend if you've got nothing to spend."

He closed the Strength tab and focused on SKILL, and the list that unfolded beneath it made him stop walking entirely.

It was enormous.

The entries rolled out in sections, dozens of them, then dozens more, organized into categories that kept going and going, and Eddy stood in the middle of the road and stared at the display as it populated itself, his mouth falling open slightly as the sheer volume of what he was looking at became apparent.

[ SKILL ] 

— Weapon Proficiencies —

Swordsmanship | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Marksmanship | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Archery | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Spear & Polearm | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Axe & Heavy Arms | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Daggers & Knives | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Unarmed Combat | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

And it kept going. Whip & Chain, Shield Mastery, Thrown Weapons, Dual Wielding, Mounted Combat, Improvised Weapons.

"Jesus Christ," Eddy said.

Then the fighting styles appeared.

— Named Fighting Styles —

The Royal Form | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

The Reaper | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

The Mirror | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

The Serpent | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Quickdraw | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

The Drunkard's Dance | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

The Marksman's Creed | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

The Iron Palm | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

The Flowing Hand | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

The Skirmisher | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

"There's fighting styles," Eddy said, still not moving, still standing in the middle of the dirt road with his head tilted up slightly as his eyes tracked across the menu. "There's actual named fighting styles, like you'd see in a kung fu movie."

Then the physical techniques. Footwork, Acrobatics, Climbing, Swimming, Stealth, Evasion, Reflexes, Precision & Aim, Parrying, Disarming, Breath Control. Then the crafts.

— Crafts & Trades —

Carpentry | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Blacksmithing | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Leatherworking | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Tailoring | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Masonry | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Engineering & Mechanics | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Tinkering & Invention | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Cooking | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Brewing & Distilling | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

"Cooking," Eddy read aloud, a note of genuine disbelief creeping into his voice. "There's a skill for cooking. There's a magic system that tracks how good I am at making dinner. This is all insane...."

The list kept going. Apothecary, Surgery & Field Medicine, Herbalism, Hunting & Tracking, Fishing, Sailing & Navigation, Cartography, Farming, Lockpicking. Then the arts: Music, Singing, Dancing, Painting, Writing, Acting, Sculpture. Then the mind and social skills, and that was where Eddy's eyes slowed down and started paying real attention.

— Mind & Social —

Persuasion | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Negotiation & Diplomacy | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Deception | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Intimidation | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Leadership & Command | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Reading People | 2 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Gambling | 1 | ○○○○○○○○○○

"Oh," Eddy said softly, and a grin was spreading across his face, the particular grin that had preceded some of the most regrettable decisions of his previous life. "Oh, hello. Persuasion. Deception. Reading People. Gambling." He read the list again, slowly, the way a man reads a love letter. "These. These are my people. These are where the magic happens."

He was tempted. 

He was very, very tempted to dump every single one of his ten starting points into Deception and Persuasion right then and there, because those were the tools he knew, those were the skills he had built his entire life around, and the idea of being supernaturally good at them was making something in his chest thump or maybe his pants rise.

But he didn't. Not yet. Because there was one more category he hadn't looked at.

He focused on WILL.

[ WILL ]

— Elements —

Fire | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Water | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Ice & Frost | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Lightning | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Wind & Air | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Earth & Stone | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Metal | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Light | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Shadow & Darkness | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Nature & Growth | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Storm & Weather | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Sound | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

"I can learn fire magic," Eddy said flatly, as if saying it out loud might make it less absurd. "I can just... learn fire magic... this system might be a little busted... with enough points you can essentially just become god."

He kept scrolling.

— Force & Structure —

Telekinesis | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Gravity | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Wards & Barriers | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Kinetic Will | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

— Conceptual & High Magic —

Enchantment & Imbuing | 5 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Transformation | 5 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Illusion & Glamour | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Mind & Charm | 5 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Healing & Restoration | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Life & Vitality | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Death & Necromancy | 5 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Soul Magic | 6 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Curses & Hexes | 5 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Blessings & Boons | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Divination & Foresight | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Animation | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Summoning & Conjuration | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Dream Magic | 5 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Binding & Sealing | 5 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Empowerment | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Spirit Sight | 3 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Voice & Song Magic | 4 | ○○○○○○○○○○

"Necromancy," Eddy said. "Maybe I should stay away from that... the dead always creep me out I can't imagine only hanging out with them."

He scrolled further.

— Apex —

Time | 8 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Space | 8 | ○○○○○○○○○○

Deal & Wish Magic | 8 | ○○○○○○○○○○

"Time," Eddy whispered. "I can learn to control time. For eight points that's crazy, what the hell would I even be able to do." He focused on the entry and a tooltip expanded.

[ TIME — Tier I ]

Command over the flow of time. Slow, accelerate, stop.

At Tier I, effects are localized and brief.

Current: ○○○○○○○○○○ (0/10)

At 10/10: Evolves to Tier II — GREATER TIME

Tier II: ○○○○○○○○○○ (0/10) — cost per point: 16

At 10/10: Evolves to Tier III — MASTER OF TIME

"Sixteen points per pip at tier two," Eddy said, his grin faltering slightly as the math hit him. "So tier one costs eighty to fill. Tier two costs a hundred and sixty. Tier three costs three hundred and twenty. That's..." He paused, his lips moving as he added it up. "That's five hundred and sixty-eight points to master time magic."

"And I have ten." 

He let out a long breath through his nose and nodded slowly. "Okay. So time magic is a long-term investment. Right now I need to focus on my survivability."

He closed the Will tab and stood there on the road in the shade of the old trees.

UNSPENT POINTS: 10

Ten points. 

"Okay, Eddy," he said, resuming his walk. "Think about this like an investment. You've got ten points of startup capital and a world full of monsters and tyrants and fairy-tale bullshit. You don't know what's in the town ahead. You don't know what's in the woods around you. You don't know anything about this world except that it's dangerous and that the system thinks you're the guy to fix it, which, again, questionable judgment on the system's part, but here we are."

Eddy stared at the number for about three more seconds before he slapped his hands together and cracked his knuckles.

"Right screw it, no point staring at a menu all day, let's get some skills."

He pulled the Strength tree back open and looked at the first two entries sitting there, he didn't let himself think about it too long because he knew these would serve him well in the long run.

"Strength. One point."

Strength — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

"Endurance. One point."

Endurance — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

UNSPENT POINTS: 8

Something shifted inside him... it wasn't painful or anything too uncomfortable more like a warmth that started in the centre of his body and spread outward into his arms and legs and fingers, like the first sip of hot coffee on a cold morning except it went deeper. Like his body had been running at ninety percent his entire life and someone had just nudged it up to one hundred.

"Oh," Eddy said, looking down at his hands and clenching his fists a couple times. "Oh that's nice if only it was this easy back on earth I might've not ended up becoming a total scumbag."

He pulled the Skill tree open and didn't hesitate.

"Swordsmanship. I'm in a Medieval fairy-tale world with monsters, bad guys, I'm gonna need a sword eventually and I'd like to know which end to hold."

Swordsmanship — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

That one hit differently than when he put a point into strength, instead information poured into his head, not a lot... more like remembering something he'd learned a long time ago and forgotten, the basics of grip and stance and the simple geometry of where a blade needs to be to stop another blade from reaching you. 

He didn't suddenly know how to fight, but he knew how to hold a sword without cutting himself, how to stand so his weight was balanced, and roughly what a parry was supposed to look like. 

"Oh shit... these point things are badass!" Eddy grabbed the sides of his skull. "It just shoved sword knowledge into my brain, well no point stopping now I'm going to need to be able to hunt!"

Archery — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

"Good good... noooow Survival. Because I'm in the middle of nowhere in a world I don't know and dying in the woods would be pretty embarrassing."

Survival — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

UNSPENT POINTS: 5

"Five points left." He cracked his neck. He could've picked a powerful magic to go along with his abilities but that's not what was importent... no the most important thing right now. Money and he could see one magic that would help him get lots of it. 

He ripped the Will tree open and scrolled past the elements, past force magic, into the Conceptual section, and jabbed his finger at the entry he'd been thinking about since the moment he first saw it.

Enchantment & Imbuing | 5 | ○○○○○○○○○○

He focused every last one of his points into it. 

Enchantment & Imbuing — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

UNSPENT POINTS: 0

This one didn't trickle information like the other skills. No instead this one hit him like a truck. Eddy staggered and almost fell over as it happened, but when it was finished... he understood,m what enchanting was. The mechanics of it, the way a person takes raw magical energy and threads it into a physical object the way you'd thread a needle, except the needle is a sword or a ring or a pair of boots and the thread is a piece of your own will made tangible. 

Different materials held enchantments differently, metal was easiest, wood harder, cloth harder still, living things couldn't be enchanted because life resisted foreign will. An enchantment needed an anchor, a symbol or mark carved or scratched into the surface, and the anchor held the magic in place after the caster's hands left.

He also understood that at Tier I his enchanting was basic as fuck. 

"Alright," Eddy said. "What can I actually do right now?"

[ ENCHANTMENT & IMBUING — Tier I ]

Current capabilities:

— Minor Sharpness: imbue a bladed weapon with slightly increased cutting edge. Duration: several hours. Requires physical contact and concentration.

— Minor Warmth: imbue clothing or fabric with gentle sustained heat. Duration: several hours. Requires physical contact and concentration.

— Minor Toughness: imbue an object with increased resistance to breaking or wear. Duration: several hours. Requires physical contact and concentration.

— Minor Glow: imbue an object with soft steady light. Duration: several hours. Requires physical contact and concentration.

— Custom Minor Enchantment: at Tier I the caster may attempt to imbue simple single-property effects into objects. Success depends on clarity of intent and suitability of material. Complex or powerful effects will fail.

Note: all Tier I enchantments are temporary. Permanent enchantment requires Tier II.

Eddy read the list twice, his face cycling through disappointment, resignation, and arriving at something that looked suspiciously like scheming.

"Temporary," he said. "Everything's temporary… damn that’s a little disappointing."

"Wait what am I complaining about this is perfect. Are you kidding me? Temporary is BETTER than permanent! Permanent means you sell a guy a magic sword once and he never comes back. Temporary means he comes back EVERY DAY. That's recurring revenue! I'm not a blacksmith, I'm a service provider!"

He started walking again, faster now, and the grin on his face was the kind that could sell ice to a penguin.

He pulled his status open one more time to see the whole picture.

[ STATUS ]

NAME: Edward Marsh

TITLE: None

LEVEL: 1

AGE: 18

FAME: Unknown

XP: 0 / 100

UNSPENT POINTS: 0

STRENGTH

Strength — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

Endurance — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

SKILL

Swordsmanship — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

Archery — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

Survival — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

WILL

Enchantment & Imbuing — Tier I ●○○○○○○○○○

HERO ARTS — locked

"Level one. No title. No fame. No points. Basic everything." He closed the window and grinned. 

"I've started with less."

He cracked his neck, shoved his hands in his pockets, and kept walking south.

"Watch out, Wall. Eddy Marsh is open for business."

...

Wall, as it turned out, was not a charming little hamlet.

Wall was a muddy collection of crooked wooden buildings squatting behind a palisade, and the moment Eddy walked through the gate, before he could so much as look around for the nearest tavern or the nearest mark or the nearest anything, a hand the size of a dinner plate closed around the back of his collar and lifted him clean off his feet.

"Got another one!" the hand's owner bellowed.

"Whoa, whoa, hey, HEY, hands, hands off the merchandise, I just got here—" Eddy got out, his boots scrambling for purchase on the mud and finding none, and then he was being carried across the square like a kitten by the scruff, past a row of grim looking men who were also being herded somewhere they clearly did not want to go.

The somewhere turned out to be a cart.

A prison cart, specifically, iron bars on all four sides, the kind of thing you put dangerous animals in, and Eddy was thrown into it bodily, landing on the wooden floor in a heap on top of a man who smelled like he'd been marinating in his own shit for several days.

A man in polished armour and a blue cloak strolled up to the cart, looked in at the half-dozen miserable bodies inside it and smiled. "Beautiful," the captain said. "Look at this haul. Stormhold thanks you for your service, gentlemen." He clapped his gauntleted hands together. "Fresh meat is always needed up north. Those savages have been chewing through our front lines faster than we can fill them, and a strong young lad like you—" he pointed at Eddy "—is exactly the kind of thing that plugs a gap nicely. Might even last a whole week."

"Okay," Eddy said, scrambling upright and grabbing the bars, "okay, okay, I think there's been a misunderstanding, a really big one, because I am not from here, I literally walked through that gate forty seconds ago, I don't even know what Stormhold is, I thought it was a type of cheese."

The captain had already walked off.

Eddy turned to the nearest guard, a bored-looking man leaning on a spear beside the cart, and switched seamlessly into the slick, reasonable, trust me bro voice. "My friend. My brother. Listen to me. You seem like a smart guy, and I can tell just by looking at you that you don't actually want to be standing here in the mud guarding a cart full of strangers, that's not the life you dreamed of, am I right? So here's what we're gonna do. You let me out, real quiet, and I make it worth your while, because I happen to be a man of considerable means—"

"You're not wearing shoes worth a copper and you've got mud on your face."

Eddy glanced down. "—a man of considerable FUTURE means, which is honestly a better investment, because—"

"Mate, if I had a coin for every conscript who told me he was secretly rich, I'd be richer than all of them put together." The guard didn't even look at him. "Save it for the savages. I'm sure they'll love a good story while they're cooking you on a spit."

"Okay wait how about—"

The guard walked to the front of the cart, the driver snapped the reins, and the whole thing lurched and started moving, hauling Eddy and his fellow recruits toward the gate and the long road north.

Eddy gripped the bars and stared out at Wall as it began to crawl past, the crooked buildings, the muddy square, the total absence of anyone who seemed even slightly bothered that six men were being carted off to die.

"System," he hissed under his breath. "System. Buddy. Pal. Now would be a GREAT time. Some assistance. Anything. A spell, a tip, a coupon. You implied this place was gonna be a nice little town where I could enchant some swords and bang some farmers' daughters and slowly build a merchant empire, but instead I've been here under a minute and I'm in a CAGE on my way to fight people who apparently eat soldiers for fun."

The system, which had been silent the entire time, chose this exact moment to chime.

[ NEW QUEST AVAILABLE ]

Eddy's eyes snapped to the window blooming in his vision.

[ A CROWN BUILT ON BONES ]

The King of Stormhold has waged an endless war for longer than most of his subjects have been alive. He feeds it with the bodies of his own people, dragging farmers and sons and strangers from their lives to die on a frozen front that never advances and never ends. Towns are emptied. Families are broken. The graves outnumber the living.

It is a wound on this world that has festered for decades.

If only a hero would rise to end it.

Objective: Bring an end to the reign of the King of Stormhold.

REWARDS:

— 50 Points

— 10,000 XP

— Heroic Alignment

— Fame

— HERO ARTS UNLOCKED

Accept? Y/N

Eddy read it once.

He read it twice.

Then his whole body went rigid against the bars and the colour drained out of his face.

"COME ON," he shouted, loud enough that two of the other recruits flinched away from him. "That's my FIRST quest? My first one?! Kill the KING? The KING of an entire kingdom, who has an entire ARMY, that's the opening number?! What the FUCK!"

The guard at the front called back without turning around. "Oi. Madman in the cart. Speak ill of the king again and I'll ram my spear up your arse."

"I just GOT here!" Eddy yelled, ignoring him completely, shaking the bars now, the quest window bobbing patiently in his vision. "I JUST GOT HERE DAMMIT AGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

The man he'd landed on earlier looked up at him with hollow, exhausted eyes.

"You alright?" the man asked.

"No!" Eddy snapped. Then, quieter, gripping the bars and watching the gates of Wall shrink into the distance. 

"No. I'm really, really not."

The cart rolled on.

(AN: New story I made a kind of unique gamer system for it, I've tried to make it look more interactive so I can feed that dopamine receptor in your brain but anyway there are a lot more magics and shit available than what you saw I just can't write it all down. Also this world is a Disney amalgamation so think MC goes around meeting Disney princesses. Also Stormhold is the main setting for the book and film Stardust which means yes the MC will be meeting a certain star. Hope you enjoyed.)