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Book 3 Ending Feedback (Patreon)

Published:
2018-08-05 05:13:54
Imported:
2026-06

Content

Well the journey is over. I hope! And I hope you enjoyed coming along with me for it. I mentioned before I'm quite the seat of your pants style writer so I always need to check in to make sure I'm hitting the right marks. 

I'm very bad at endings so I really need your help here. If you can give me your answers to the following questions I'd be greatly appreciative. 

1) Did Witgar showing back up in Chapter 45 surprise you at all? 

2) Did the way Witgar dies feel satisfying and make sense? Or did it feel a bit deus ex machina and cheap?

3) Did chapter 45 feel like a natural ending?

4) Did chapter 46 add to the book or takeaway? 

5) Did 46 end on enough of a cliffhanger to make you crave the next book?

6) What are you overall feelings for book 3 as a whole?

7) Are there any areas you wanted more of or less of?

 

My thank in advance for all your answers guys! Once again I thank you for all your support and encouragement while writing this and hope it was enjoyable for you. :D 

The next plan will be to continue on with the series. I already have the first chapter of book 4 written, which I'll share shortly. But first it will be processing the feedback, adding tweaks and then getting this off to the editor.

So stay tuned guys. More is yet to come!

Comments

Marc Krafft

I think 46 is important in setting up the next book. It wouldn’t have felt complete after 45. Though I think his going for Braxxus is clearly within the scope of his characters motivations, him talking about ruling a kingdom seemed well out of them.

Marc Krafft

Also, bravo another great read! Keep up the fantastic work.

Mike Prunella

Hi Rick! Thank you for bringing your world to life! I love vacationing there 😜. As far as your questions, I knew Witgar wasn’t dead yet, and you made a point of mentioning that, so I figured he’d be back at some point, and it felt good having him double back. I had already forgotten about the lizard monster with all the action in between. I’m not sure if Witgar’s death feels “cheap” but it would have been way more satisfying if the party took him down, I mean how often do you get s chance to assassinate the builder of what is essentially Olympus. As far as the epilogue, if I were on the team I wouldn’t want to leave Braxis there to rebuild at our backs while we set off to New London. I’m 100% behind Reese, no matter his motivations, and I can’t wait to find out what happens next! Thanks again!

Dax

I liked the fact that Witgar ambushed them. I did feel his death was a little cheap though. Perhaps the salamander could have provided the opportunity for Reese (or Aiko, if Reese fails, but Val pops a Raise while the giant is distracted) to use Assassinate or some extreme critical hit to finish him off? I liked the epilogue, but it doesnt feel like a real cliffhanger. It just feels unfinished. It doesn't really have enough suspense.

Robert Quach

Hey Rick, congratulations on finishing this book! I honestly liked how things ended up with Witgars pursuit and end. I didn't think him showing up was too much of a surprise. I am not sure if that was from following your updates and previous questions on how to proceed or in how you characterize him in the previous engagement, he has been one of most intelligent legendary monsters that you have introduced and you have shown him to be both stubborn and spiteful. It honestly makes sense for him to keep pursuit and it wouldn't have been satisfying for him to be left alive. My only issue with the scene in how it is currently written is that I feel like you missed an opportunity with the ice salamanders entrance. You had him enter and end the fight in literally a moment. Maybe its growing up on Jurassic park and later in life playing every monster hunter game but I believe giant reptilian creatures deserve an entrance full of destructive gravitas. I understand the ice salamander was invisible and probably has some degree of natural stealth but the terrain is icy forest that's been shattered by a couple large aoes attacks from a legendary monster. If the ice salamander didn't get hit by the attacks then it must have closed in really fast in which it would have made a bit noise while crashing through towards witgar. And if the ice salamander was in fact in range and and was aggrod by the aoes and chose to sneak up on witgar in response, it could have been expressed with ominous shimmer a flash of blue or even a full break of stealth as the figure moved up on witgar. Also I think the attack itself while descriptive and demonstrated the ice salamander elemental abilities really well, it could have been more animated. Witgars is a giant legendary monster, even injured going from 35 to 0 from a single bite and freeze was just so sudden. Even if you had added a single sequence that caused it go from 35->1x->0 it would cause the scene to flow better and build a bit more tension with the beast. I dont think it has too be all that complicated or all that different from how you currently have the attack written out. Like if witgar noticed the salamander approach last moment and attempted to move the attack could still happen, the clamp would be less instantly fatal, the ice effect could now occur on a surprised and conscience witgar which would endure the subsequent death slams that you had originally written for witgar post mortem. Overall I very much enjoyed the book and I think you did a great job setting up book 4 all the while keeping this adventure very wild and fun.

Marc Krafft

Hi Rick, I really liked having the salamander coming back to kill Witgar. It seems to have implications for killing Braxxus. Which makes that decision, IMHO, even more complicated for Reese. Also, I agree that to allow someone like Braxxus to hound you and attempt to kill you and your friends over and over again is enough of a motivation and protecting his friends and family has been his motivation all along. It’s Definitely in keeping with his personality.

Jonathan Campbell

I don't know why but for some reason this book as is shown thus far feels far too short like regardless of how many words made up the whole that the contents were just too short of a journey overall for what happened and the journey that the characters underwent, granted there was a decent amount of character development but the fact that so little happened and wasn't even really bolstered by going through much in the way of the thought processes of the characters or details of things like options for keep/town building and the like. Honestly it just kinda felt more like 2/3 to 3/4 of a whole book rather than 100% but maybe that's just me. Oh also unless I'm forgetting it there was never even any mention of what if any reply Reece sent back to Wilbur via pigeon.