I, Kibutsuji Muzan, Does Not Want To Die (Patreon)

Chapter 7: Journey

"Yugetsu, I need you to check in on Nakime from time to time.

If anything happens… lend her your aid. I’m counting on you."

"Understood."

Just before our departure, Yugetsu and I spoke in the mountains near the town where Nakime was set to operate.

Having spent decades living in the mountains, Yugetsu seemed to have no complaints about staying behind.

I was grateful for that and bid him farewell as well.

. . . . . . . . . .

Leaving Nakime and Yugetsu behind left me with a slight sense of unease.

Until now, I had never parted ways with those I had turned into demons.

This would be an experiment of sorts—observing how our connection might change with distance—but still, I couldn't help but worry.

—That said, there had been no issues in all these decades.

I reassured myself that things would be fine, and with that, Tamayo and I set off on our journey.

Having lived comfortably for decades, traveling proved to be full of challenges.

I quickly came to appreciate the luxury of having a roof over my head.

After all, there was almost nothing I could do during the day.

The worst incident was when I took shelter from the rain under a tree, only for it to be struck by lightning.

And immediately after, the sky cleared as if nothing had happened.

With nowhere to escape the sunlight, the despair I felt in that moment was immeasurable.

For the first time in my life, I dug a hole to hide in—an experience I never wished to repeat.

That event solidified my belief that traveling should only be done at night.

Even as we journeyed, I continued my experiments.

The primary issue with being a demon was the necessity of consuming humans.

Without that need, demons would simply be exceptionally resilient beings.

—But of course, things weren’t that simple.

From a sorcerous perspective, perhaps demons gained their powerful bodies in exchange for carrying the burden of their sins—the sin of consuming human flesh.

If that were true, then abstaining from eating humans should, in theory, strip them of their demonic traits.

If that were the case, wouldn't they eventually return to being human?

But the demon’s instincts made such a thing nearly impossible.

A demon’s hunger, once it reached its peak, left them unable to think rationally.

Tamayo had once conquered those instincts, but she firmly stated she doubted she could endure it a second time.

Ideally, I would have tested what happened if a demon went without feeding for even longer.

But I had no intention of subjecting Tamayo, Nakime, or myself to such an ordeal.

"Guh… Gaaaghh… ah…"

"…Another failure."

A filthy bandit lay dead, blood seeping from his mouth.

He had attacked us, intending to kill us for our belongings, and I had struck him down in self-defense.

I used the opportunity to test my blood on him, but…

It seemed he could not withstand it.

"Hmph. This isn’t going well."

"Seeing this… could it be that Nakime-chan and I were simply incredibly lucky…?"

"That’s—! I’d like to say no, but…"

Tamayo, watching the scene, murmured uneasily.

I wanted to deny her words, but reality would not change.

With this, the number of humans I had tried turning into demons had surpassed ten.

And considering the results… I could not bring myself to refute her.

"Hmm… but why? What’s different?"

My instincts told me that this amount of blood should have been sufficient to turn him into a demon.

—Well, there was no helping it.

"What's done is done. Let's take care of the body and use it for sustenance."

"…Alright."

Tamayo's expression was difficult to read, and I found no more words to say.

. . . . . . . . . .

The primary goal of this journey was to find a way to turn demons back into humans.

If Nakime wished to live as a musician, then her existence as a demon would inevitably be a burden.

That was why I continued my research—to restore her humanity so that she could fully enjoy life as a musician.

—Though, I had yet to find even the faintest clue.

I also searched for the Blue Spider Lily, hoping it might provide some insight, but I had found no information at all.

—Well, there was no helping that either.

For now, I could only take things one step at a time.

"Ah, Lord Muzan, I heard there's a place on that mountainside where beautiful flowers are in full bloom.

Would you like to go see them together?"

"…I see. There's a chance the Blue Spider Lily could be mixed in with them.

Very well, let's go take a look."

"—Eh?"

"Eh…?"

"Ah— no, you're right! We should definitely go and search!"

…Did I say something strange?

Tilting my head in confusion, I noticed Tamayo giving me a slightly awkward smile, as if trying to cover something up.

Unfortunately, the Blue Spider Lily was nowhere to be found among the flowers blooming on the mountainside.

However, the sight of countless flowers illuminated by the moonlight was breathtaking.

That night, Tamayo and I stood side by side for a long while, silently admiring the beauty before us.

. . . . . . . . . .

During our journey, we came across a dying human.

He seemed to have been attacked by a beast—his abdomen was torn open, and his intestines were spilling out.

Though he was still alive, gritting his teeth in agony, he wouldn’t last much longer.

"Huff… huff… huff…"

The man himself must have understood it as well. Even after finding us, he simply clutched his abdomen, his breathing rough and labored.

He did not even call for help.

—Yet, his eyes welled with tears, trembling in fear as the shadow of death crept closer...

Perhaps unconsciously, his mouth began to move, forming silent words without sound, yet unmistakable in their meaning.

"I don't want to die."

The moment I heard that voiceless plea, I found myself injecting my blood into the dying man.

And then... I came to realize that my blood reflected my will far more than I had imagined.

In the end, everything was dictated by my own intentions.

Thinking back, I had already sensed it—when I first turned Nakime into a demon.

A human who receives my blood will not turn into a demon unless I truly, from the depths of my heart, wish for it.

“Ah— guh—!”

With a sharp cracking sound, the wounds on his abdomen began to heal, and his canine teeth elongated into fangs.

In the end, I was never capable of conducting starvation experiments on demons.

Because the only ones I wished to turn into demons were those I did not want to die.

And there was no way I could bring myself to be cruel to such people.

Mere filthy bandits—I had no reason to wish for their survival...

Yet, even then, deep down, I did not wish to make anyone suffer.

—How contradictory.

Was I trying to claim that the life of a demon was without suffering?

Did I think that Tamayo had never suffered at all?

How foolish—everything was nothing more than my own selfish perception.

As I gazed down at the man, now kneeling slowly before me as a newly transformed demon, I could only feel disgusted by my own self-indulgence.

At that moment, I felt Tamayo press herself against my back.

She wrapped her arms around my chest, holding me tightly…

And as if clinging to that warmth, I placed my hand over hers.

Tamayo said nothing.

She simply stayed by my side in silence.

And that, more than anything, was comforting.

. . . . . . . . . .

As I continued my journey, selfishly saving those I wished to save and spreading the cursed existence of demons in my wake…

One night, under a magnificent full moon, I found myself gazing out at the sea, illuminated by moonlight, enjoying a quiet drink.

Zaaaaaah…

The sound of the waves was soothing.

“—The ocean bathed in sunlight is beautiful as well.”

Tamayo poured me another drink, and I took a small sip.

I couldn't truly taste the alcohol, nor could my demon body become intoxicated.

But these things were about the atmosphere.

Perhaps one could say I was getting drunk on the mood itself.

Heh, it seemed Tamayo thought it made me look rather dashing—like a refined, mature man. I could feel her thoughts reaching me.

—Hm? Does that mean you usually don't think of me as an adult man?

Strange. I am always an adult man… or at least, I should be.

—Well, whatever.

I tilted my cup and drank my sake.

"If you were to return to being human, would you watch it with me again?"

Hearing those words, spoken with a gentle smile, I narrowed my eyes.

—So that's what she thinks. Tamayo believes that I am searching for the Blue Spider Lily in order to become human again.

But in truth, my goal is solely to find a way to turn demons back into humans—for Nakime’s sake.

…Well, there’s no need to correct her unnecessarily.

"Ah… That doesn’t sound bad."

When I answered, Tamayo deepened her smile and poured more sake into my cup.

Heh, this isn’t bad.

I thought the same thing when we watched the cherry blossoms before—spending time appreciating beauty at a leisurely pace is quite pleasant.

It soothes the heart… perhaps even heals it.

Setting aside time for moments like this… it wouldn’t be so bad.

And so, surrounded by the beautiful moon, the beautiful sea, and the beautiful Tamayo, I spent a blissful time, feeling truly content.

The next morning…

"…Forgive me… Muzan-sama…"

"—Yugetsu—? Nakime—!"

Yugetsu’s final words reached me… and I realized he had perished.

And… Nakime’s voice was nowhere to be heard.

. . . . . . . . . .

"That is all… You both did well…

Tonight’s Blood Battle for Rank…

The victors are… the challengers…

Daki, Gyutaro… You two are the new Upper Rank Six."

"W-We won—!"

"Well, obviously… It was two against one…"

—So, even though they only recently became demons, they’ve already climbed to the sixth-highest rank, huh?

In my stronghold, the Infinity Castle, a Rank Exchange Blood Battle had taken place for the first time in a while.

The Rank Exchange Blood Battle is a duel system proposed by Kokushibo for the Twelve Kizuki, allowing demons to claim higher ranks.

A lower-ranked demon can challenge a higher-ranked one, and if the challenger wins, they take the superior rank.

Every year, Akaza challenges Kokushibo and loses. Then, another demon—who underestimates Akaza—challenges him, only to be utterly defeated.

If any other duels occur, the challengers are usually slaughtered without success.

However, in the blood battle that had just taken place, after a fierce struggle, the challengers, Daki and Gyutaro, emerged victorious and claimed the position of Upper Rank Six of the Twelve Kizuki.

These two were a unique type of demon, unlike anything I had ever seen before, despite having turned countless humans into demons myself.

We demons have several weaknesses, one of which is the Nichirin Blades wielded by the Demon Slayer Corps. If our necks are severed by those blades, we die.

However, due to their peculiarity of being two yet one, Daki and Gyutaro did not die even when one of them had their neck severed.

Daki boasted about how they had used this ability to triumph over the demon slayers, but as I listened skeptically, her head suddenly fell off.

"If it's a Nichirin Blade… I have one. If you test it… you'll understand."

Daki, looking completely bewildered, stared up at me with only her head, seemingly unable to comprehend what had just happened.

Then, she turned her gaze toward Kokushibo, who had swung the blade.

Her tear-filled eyes met mine, as if silently pleading for something.

What followed was utter chaos—soothing a bawling Daki, restraining Gyutaro as he lunged at Kokushibo, stopping Akaza from gleefully joining the fight, and holding back Doma, who was laughing and egging them on.

In the end, I had to put a stop to it all by caving in Kokushibo's face after he sliced up everything around us.

—I'd rather not go through that again.

—I got sidetracked. Let's return to the matter at hand.

Daki and Gyutaro becoming Upper Rank Six is a good outcome.

Though, when I think of the sacrifices made in the process, I hesitate to call it entirely good—but let’s set that aside.

"Now then… Muzan-sama… please proceed."

"…So, I have to do it after all?"

"But of course… The appointment of the Twelve Kizuki, and the engraving of their numbers into their eyes… only Muzan-sama can do that…"

"Y-Yes! Please, Muzan-sama!"

Daki stood straight, her arms at her sides, staring at me with expectation.

—Sigh. I suppose I have no choice.

"Fine. Hime, keep your eyes open and don’t move."

I dislike this process—it requires delicate precision.

Placing my left hand under Daki’s chin, I tilted her face slightly upward, then slowly brought the fingers of my right hand toward her eyes.

As I gazed at her face, I couldn’t help but let out a small smile at her youthful features.

She still has traces of childhood innocence…

I do feel something about having turned such a young girl into a demon, making her devour enough humans to rise to Upper Rank Six… but if I hadn't, she would have died.

For that decision alone, I suppose I can praise Doma—just for that.

Alright, now to engrave the number into Daki’s eyes…

"Pii—!"

"…Why are you turning your face away?"

"Ah, um, y-you're too close— Ah, ihyu…"

As I leaned in, Daki’s face turned red, and she averted her gaze.

—At this rate, I won’t be able to engrave the number.

"What the hell are you doing? You’re such a useless brat. Don’t go causing trouble for Muzan-sama."

"B-But—! O-Onii-chan, you go first! I-I can’t do this, my heart feels like it’s going to explode—!"

—How troublesome.

Well, if she insists that she can't do it, I won’t force her.

I suppose I’ll engrave Gyutaro’s eyes first, as requested.

Daki practically flung herself away from me and ran to Nakime, crying.

In exchange, Gyutaro stepped forward, bowing his head slightly.

"Ah— Sorry about my sister, Muzan-sama…

And for making you look at my face up close… It must be disgusting, right?"

Disgusting? What nonsense.

"Ridiculous."

I leaned in toward Gyutaro.

"What is there to be concerned about? No matter how much you think of yourself as disgusting or ugly, it doesn’t matter to me.

And despite that self-loathing, you have protected your beautiful sister all this time—you are a man of great pride.

Your performance in the blood battle was remarkable.

You could have left Daki to fend for herself, given your unique ability, yet you made sure she wasn’t harmed.

Be proud. Do not belittle yourself. I accept all that you are."

A man with such dignity should not be degrading himself.

He should have more confidence in himself.

Now then… this time for sure, I’ll engrave the number into his eyes…

Or so I thought, but as I reached toward him, I noticed Gyutaro’s face had turned red, and he was desperately avoiding my gaze.

"Onii-chan is avoiding it too! See!? You get it, right!? Right!?"

"S-Shut up—!"

"…I haven’t even started yet… What am I supposed to do with this?"

I sighed, scratching the back of my head, and glanced at the other Upper Ranks for help, but they only shook their heads, utterly useless.

Neither of them calmed down, and I couldn’t afford to rush the process.

In the end, I had to wear a hood that only revealed my eyes.

—Why am I even doing this?

As I pondered that question, I carefully engraved the kanji for "Six" (陸) into Daki’s slightly flushed eyes.

In the end, it took almost an entire day to engrave both of them.

—Is it really necessary to carve the numbers into their eyes?