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May Bonus Poll: TERRIBLE Space movies (Patreon)

Published:
2022-05-06 14:57:37
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

Content

We wanna hear your schlockiest space operas, your worst alien encounters, your far our other lunar oddesies and then we'll pick one undemocratically :) 

Comments

Mark Siefert

Space Mutiny. Reb Brown, filmed in a factory, recycled space combat scenes from the 70s Battlestar Galactica, characters appearing alive in the scene AFTER they are killed, and, best of all , CAMERON MITCHELL IN A MUUMUU!

A.J.

How have you not done Battlefield Earth yet?!

Dustin Hummel

Leprechaun in Space!! We've seen him in the hood so let's follow him to space.

Sarvis

Star Wars Episode 2: Attack of The Clones. Or Episode 9: The Rise of Skywalker I really want you guys to do more Star Wars movies, the episodes you have on them are great.

David

Battlefield Earth for sure

Khristle

You gotta do Moonfall right? Like you gotta

FabricatorOfUselessUtterances

I have soooooo many suggestions! The film adaptation on Isaac Azimov’s short story ‘Nightfall’ has got to be one of the worst films ever made, period.

A.J.

Disney's "The Black Hole. "

Diana

Devil Girl from Mars! Aliens, alcoholism, AND anti-feminist propaganda from the 1950s.

Chris W

Curve ball here, the film Knowing. Its got it all - Nick Cage, aliens, biblical prophecy, shit dialogue, everything!

B. King

Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn. 80's "3d" sci-fi western with Richard Moll

Trish Roper

Battle beyond the stars. A Star Wars/Magnificent Seven rip-off where the spaceship has boobs.

Geoffrey T. Blackwell

Lost in Space (1998) is, I think, the perfect kind of goofy-bad for you guys.

MrHolbyta

I mentioned Phobe: The Xenophobic Experiments in a message, but I'll toss it in the ring here, too.

Dexter

Yor!

Damon Blanchette

Jupiter Ascending is a beautiful, awful piece of shit

FabricatorOfUselessUtterances

Last couple for now: Wing Commander, Just stupid bad, and Turkish Star Wars. The later being almost incomprehensible madness.

Birder Stuart

‘Solo’ - the cinematic expression of the word ‘meh’

lf

Oh! That's a personal favorite.

lf

Yes! Flank Slabrock! Bob Johnson!

Mark Siefert

FRIDGE LARGEMEAT! FIST ROCKBONE!

Dustin Hanson

Armageddon, but Heath misunderstood the assignment and watches Deep Impact

tarin indell

Killer Klowns from Outer Space

lf

I like the film, but "Hellraiser: Bloodline." Pinhead goes head-to-head with the descendant of Lament Configuration's creator... in SSSPPPAAACCCEE!

John F

Big McLargeHuge!

Paul Freelend

Spoiled for choice here. Prometheus, Battlefield Earth, Mac and Me (it's an alien from space, at least), Armageddon, Jupiter Ascending, The Adventures of Pluto Nash ... the list goes on and on. If I only had to pick one, Battlefield Earth will probably end up on the main feed some day, so I'll say Prometheus.

Tom Gould

Ice pirates! It has a sexxy lizard lady, a castration machine, time travel, and huge blocks of ice to have sword fights on. Its kinda awesome!

lf

Whisper whisper whisper same shots re-used at nauseum. Whisper whisper whisper.

Jeff Grenet

Someone mentioned it already, but I gotta toss in some support for Starcrash, its BAFFLING what happens in this movie. Does the main character suddenly have magic powers with no explanation or set up? You bet your ass he does!

lf

The logic of Prometheus was so sad :(

Iridescent Pigsie

Space Mutiny. All the thrill of golfcart-racing and semi-high-walkways-without-saftey-rails-falling...IN SPACE!

Stuart Blair

Star Crash. Incredibly, David Hasselhoff delivers the best performance from the cast. Also features an actor so robotic in his delivery that it's not clear throughout the movie whether he is actually playing a robot or is just a terrible actor. Robinson Crusoe on Mars is another odd one

Ashley Kennett

Battle beyond the stars a true joy of the 1980s.

Leighanne Davis

Star Games. Evil Tony Curtis who completely phones in his performance. Clowns etc. It was horrible

TBoneSF

Definitely Star Crash because it has David Hasselhoff and Christopher Plummer. Plummer explained why he starred in this Italian Star Wars ripoff with "most actors would be willing to do porn if it meant they could spend the summer in Rome".

Mark H

The Green Slime has a special place in my heart. Rubber tentacled cyclops aliens!. Italian sexpots! Tomato juice blood! And a…catchy?…theme song. THE GREEN SLIME!!!! https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0064393/

Michael Colon

Ice Pirates. What.... was it? Why is it?

AnEvolvedFilthyMonkeyMan

Space Cowboys! Clint Eastwood, Tommy Lee Jones, Donald Sutherland! The best-worst writes itself.

Don Toovey

Mom and dad save the world,the very loosest of the term sci fi

Don Toovey

Space rangers while technically a series.It tried to be many things and fails at all of them

Don Toovey

If you’ve not done it yet the undisputed schlock “Heavyweight champion of the woooooooooorld”.Statship troopers

Mark H

Loved that when I was a kid

Mark H

YAAAAAAS

Mark H

I loved that movie as a kid! Does it not hold up?

Will

As an 80's kid I have soft spots for Howard The Duck and Killer Clowns From Outer Space.

Mark H

Star Crash looks like what Star Wars would have been if George Lucas had had the same leeway in them as in the prequels.

Wookiestick

The 1989 movie, Robot Jox. It's a post WW3 story where wars are decided via champions in giant mech suits.

Toast

Transmorphers, a transformers ripoff about aliens that take over the world forcing humans to live underground. 1.6/10 on IMDb

Adam Parkin

Badi, the Turkish rip off of ET

Adam Parkin

Jason X? I like that one 😂

Dion Bouman

I remember "2001: A space travesty" to be terrible. Or maybe it's just the fog of time.

Devil Doc Josue

Y'all need to do Geostorm with Gerald Butler

Caitlin Cipriano

I second Battlefield Earth. Oh God, Eli's impression of John Trovolta alone.

Patrick Bracken

Cosmos: War of the Planets, which features a robot made out of air conditioners.

Ada the Muscle Witch

Also you forgot to mention it was filmed in South Africa during the apartheid, uses footage from Battlestar Galactica and has dancing space witches

Joel Turner

Event Horizon - I used to think this movie was the shit, and scary fucked up, but it didn’t age well

Patrick Haughton

Starcrash, Jason X, Pluto Nash, Saturn 3, Flash Gordon

Lisorael

Star Crash!!! Do it!

David Brooklyn

I've nominated that a couple of times, but I'd still love to that happen. It's GREAT bad

I_know_you_dont_really_care

Battlefield Earth, of course! Worthy of mention: Any episode of Space 1999 Any episode of UFO (the 1960's series) Obviously Howard the duck All Highlander movies except the 1st (because the 1st wasn't aliens)

Mobius Rex

Buckaroo Bonzai. A brain surgeon-astronaut-racecar driver-rock star stops an alien invasion with help from his man harem and a half-lizard mad scientist. And Jeff Goldblum.

I’mNotSayingThat

This. I liked the book as a kid (especially the second one focused on Bean).

Iridescent Pigsie

True! I also forgot Thick McRunfast's geriatric "teenage" love interest who's *presenting like a mandrill*, the ignored resurrection of that one bridge woman, and that the space witches were only added to pad the runtime

Tom from College Park

I nominate "The Man Who Fell To Earth" for complete lack of plot. Also, the remake of "The Day The Earth Stood Still" for trashing one of the classic Si Fi movies of the 1950's.

Dustin Price

Star Crash (Hasselhoff!), Battlefield Earth (Travolta!), or Buckaroo Banzai (Lithgow!). All are GAM gold! Why is there a watermelon there? Will we find out later?

Kim-nir

This please, its got the 5 types of weather! Hot, Cold, Waves, Wind and Lasers. Plus magic gravity controlling paint.

Kidda Sweet

Jupiter Ascending. Howard the Duck, which has the creepiest near human and a bird sex scene.

Shut up Wesley!

Valerian: The City of a Thousand Planets. Hot garbage that tries to be an epic space adventure with a very 5th Element aesthetic but none of the charm. The leads have no chemistry despite the movie pretending otherwise and it has a shape shifting pole dancer played by Rihanna.

Unofficial_Opinion

Wanted to see if anyone was going to mention Sunshine.

Jin Hadah

You take that back! This was a masterpiece!

Niamh Coghlan

Another vote for Battlefield Earth. I mean seriously how can we not do Scientology In Space?

Julie Wine&Reason

"Ice Pirates" is a deep cut of best/worst space/science fiction movies from the '80s. If y'all can find it, I think you'll have a lot of fun with it.

Julie Wine&Reason

That one took the franchise to a Hell in the heavens place for sure. LOL

Jeb Dale

Three votes from 5 hours ago! The people have spoken!!

lf

Oh that's a crime against humanity.

Julie Wine&Reason

I love Flash Gordon. It's terrible in the best way. Although... I'm thinking the villain is going to be problematic watching it now. There will be cringe!

lf

The theme by Apollo Four Forty was insanely good.

Jennifer Nollan

Ghosts of Mars. I love John Carpenter, but this was truly terrible.

Sara Daveline

It holds up pretty well but it is still a hilarious premise.

CarrieBoo

I'm surprised they haven't done this one now that u mention.

CarrieBoo

Castration machine, you say?

CarrieBoo

I do love this movie and I would love to hear it get ripped to shreds.

CarrieBoo

Just to throw in one I haven't seen on the list yet... Apollo 18 (2011)

Jennifer Eckert

Oh, please do Flash Gordon. I barely remember it from my childhood but I’m pretty sure it was ridiculous. But I remember watching it several times and I need to know if my 7 year old self liked bad movies. 😂

Rewi Arts

Voyage of the Space Aliens. It's an 80's rock opera that might be the most 80's movie ever made. If the 80's were drink mix then Tango and Cash would be a glass that's mixed with the perfect amout of water and tastes perfect; Voyage of the Space Aliens would be snorting rails of drink mix till you die

Sammy Sews That

Sunshine has good cinematography though. I think they need to do something that looks as bad as it is.

Scoop Bucky

Perhaps controversial, but Rise of Skywalker. That was a steamer that was given to us.

Dustin Price

How does it compare to Iron Sky?

BDonz

The Arrival (1996) Took a while to find out the name because the only thing I remember about watching this on late night TV as a kid besides it being bad was the ending with the body transformation looking really stupid

Roslyn Walker

Moonfall, which even my 7 year old declared to be trash

CarrieBoo

....one has fewer Nazis?

Ilan Woll

Star Trek 5 or Nemesis

Ilan Woll

You confused awesome movies here.

Celena Jones

Apollo 18 (2011), produced by Harvey Weinstein “What we have here is Conspiracy Theory 101 all Blair-Witched-up.”

Jonathan Renderos

Doom, starring our favorite sweatiest action hero, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson.

Curby Dickens

Battlefield Earth. Voyage of the Rock Aliens.

Regina Calabrese

THE ORIGINAL DUNE. Patrick Stewart carries a pug into battle. I want Eli's reaction to that SO FUCKING BAD.

mmik

That one Cloverfield movie

Itai

Rim Of The World

Leslie Marchant

2001: A Space Odyssey. Unwatchable. This is the hill I die on.

RocketDoc

Buckaroo Banzai is objectively wonderful

RocketDoc

I think they have to do that in the mainline show and give us a different sci fi one.

RocketDoc

Yea, but it knew it was ridiculous. It was literally pulp sci-fi comic strips with a Queen soundtrack

Scott Farley

Gor. Having read the books a few years before the movie it was bad even then.

Notorious PJZ

This is a new one that just came out and it's sooooo fucking ridiculous that I couldn't look away!!! It stars the man half of the supper christian ghost hunters of Annabel fame. It has a comic relief that I can only imagine is Marsh on acid! It took 55 million to make this steaming pile of warped scenes with a tenuous grasp of reality! Enjoy? https://m.imdb.com/title/tt5834426/

Notorious PJZ

Fun fact: Moon fall has a cat named Fuzz Aldren in it and is one of the most charismatic characters in this thing. Sorry for posting twice!

Victor Matesi

The Black Hole. The king of Star Wars rip offs.

RocketDoc

Armageddon is a special kind of terrible for somehow getting every bit of physics and engineering wrong. And just being genuinely terrible, but I suspect it won’t make it, because everyone already knows how terrible it is. But as a rocket scientist, working with other rocket scientists,, we used to sit around and do the drunken MST3K thing all the time. That, and “The Core”. Which is equally accurate in the other direction. But gets geophysics even worse than Armageddon gets astrophysics.

Mattbox

2nding Doom or Battlefield Earth

MutatedWisdom

The Turkish trainwreck "Dünyayı Kurtaran Adam", AKA "The Man Who Saved the World", AKA "Turkish Star Wars", is easily the best worst space shit ever.

cwoodfield

One more vote for Moonfall. Because it deserves it.

Rebecca Cooper

Um. I went to find this because it does sound amazing and there's a short of the same name from 1950 with a very different description. If it's not porn, they need to rewrite that summary.

Rebecca Cooper

My vote here as well! Best movie ever.

Rebecca Cooper

Love it but I think it might be in on it's own joke a bit too much for this treatment.

RocketDoc

Isn’t it Ice Pirates where a doomsday bomb has an existential crisis? How could you do better?

My PhD is in studying palindromes. I'm Dr Awkward

Movie in space: since you just did Two Days From Today (sorry, The Day After Tomorrow), it seems like you should really do Moonfall. Otherwise Apollo 18 is pretty crummy. Movie with space stuff: Battle: Los Angeles is the perfect secular GAM. It tries to be really good. It’s not.

Alex Hencken

John Carpenter’s Dark Star or Starman

tarin indell

Looks like my comment didnt save. I voted for Killer Klowns from Outer Space

Bobby Tropicana

Just barely a space movie but definitely awesome. I met Gary Graham once at a Trek convention and told him how much I loved the movie, and he said to me "You're that guy. You're that ONE guy that loves that movie...". Later at the convention I got his autograph and had him write "To the ONE fan of RobotJox."

Bobby Tropicana

Aww, I liked Nemesis. It's the more serious version of Insurrections.

Bobby Tropicana

Battle: Los Angeles could make it to the main feed if you consider military propoganda to be religious; pretty sure it was made with the cooperation of the US Marine Corps.

Your Music Saved Us

the years move faster than the days, there's no warmth in the light. benson arizona. the warm wind through your hair. my body flies the galaxies my heart longs to be there! benson arizona. the same song in the skies. the days seem so much kinder when we watch them you and I!!!!!!

NowhereChrissy

SPACE CAMP. My all time favorite space movie (even now). It’s cheesy 80’s goodness that I still quote to this day. You can watch it on YouTube.

NowhereChrissy

Also, The Last Starfighter would be a fun one.

Troublemaker Jake

Space Truckers, the great Charles Dance with a pull start cybernetic penis. I think I've said enough.

Troublemaker Jake

Oh, Also Stephen Dorff and Dennis Hopper, now I've said enough.

Tom jackson

Battlefield Earth. Travolta should be ashamed of himself.

CarrieBoo

I've seen the movie. I hadn't seen it on the list yet. I enjoy the found footage genre and this movie, but it is absurd.

B

Dracula 3000. It ends with Tiny Lister and a robot hooker going off to bang before their ship crashes into a sun

Joshua Little

God I remember how excited I was when it was announced and went and watched it right away. Ugh, so damn boring.

Joshua Little

Only if they let Eli read up on the Goreans BDSM community and explain it to the other guys/guests.

Mark Siefert

Personally,I think Battlefield Earth ought to be a regular GAM episode since it is a “sacred” text of $cientology.

Mark Siefert

Like Manos, It’s one of the classic MST3K episodes.

Mark Siefert

Well, Orson Scott Cars is a Mormon.

Joshua Little

I vote for The Wandering Earth. Basically in the future the Earth is about to be swallowed by the Sun turning into a red giant.... so they strap giant engines to the planet and turn it into a giant spaceship to move out to Jupiter's orbit where it'd be safe. Just look up the trailer, I think that Moonfall might actually be more realistic compared to this one which means this one would be funnier. Oh and speaking of Jupiter... Jupiter Ascending would also be great. Come on, Mila Kunis getting horny over a dog man, Sean Bean who's made of Bees, the most overacted bad guy in quite a while and basically an ancient family that controls the galaxy through.. essentially, adrenachrome. I don't think they are named Rothschild though. Oh, and Mila Kunis is a "genetic reincarnation" of the bad guys mother and lots of implied incest.. so, you know, Heath would love it.

Mark Siefert

Now, by “best” you mean “sucks moose dick,” because the Denis Villenue adaptation was sublime. Hell, even the SciFi Channel’s miniseries version was better than the pile of pre-spice-mass that was Lynch’s abomination.

Mark Siefert

SAVIOR OF THE UNIVERSE! (Soaring Brian May guitar solo)

Joshua Little

But backwards knees... BACKWARDS KNEEES.

Joshua Little

Obviously the.. rock spiders uploaded it to youtube.

Mark Siefert

Yes, starring John Boy, Hannibal Smith, the white guy from Enter The Dragon, and co-directed by Roger Corman and featuring a soundtrack by the late, great James Horner.

Joshua Little

I would love to hear Eli's reaction to duck tits. I mean... there's duck tits. I don't even know how to process that to this day. I also nominated Jupiter Ascending. Dog men, bee boys, adrenachrome, incest, it has it all.

Joshua Little

Huh.. oh yeah I guess it technically is him as an alien again. And there's that fairy girl.

Mark Siefert

The weird ending could qualify it as a Christian movie.

Joshua Little

It hurts so much that the movie was so good until that third act.

That Julia Person

Jupiter Ascending is an absolute masterpiece of nonsense.

FabricatorOfUselessUtterances

Oh shit! How did I forget Enemy Mine?! That was all kinds of glorious horribleness. Alien Louis Gossett Jr laying eggs for Dennis Quaid to raise? Yes please!

Amanda

After Earth was amazingly fucking stupid; the spaceship appeared to be constructed of mostly toilet paper, there was that whole thing about the cat creature (and boo to what happened to it), and his son was clearly embarrassed the whole way through to be involved in this nonsense

AmbyLotl

have yall done Plan 9 From Outer Space? The acting felt like it was done by aliens that had a fairly loose grasp on the English language :3

lf

Iron Sky was watchable. It's sequel however... stopped 15 minutes in.

lf

"You die Joe!" It's definitely not for everyone, but it's ground breaking.

lf

"But they're out there. And I'll be in there." Such a moving scene.

HidariMak

Moonfall. As colossally stupid as the movie Armageddon was, the stupidity in Moonfall is even more blatant.

Thomas J McMullan

I suggest "It the Terror From Beyond Space" this gem bout one of the victims "All of his in his body are broken, but tht a was not the cause of death." The alien had its tongue out, because the mask was done wrong and the stuntman's chin stood out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OZHrCkEmgFo and the Creeping Terror which makes Manos look like Lawrence of Arabia https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IgiA2u2FL7c and Starship Invasions where Robert Vaughn helps defear Christopher Invasion of Earth https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QESnwxRUxyw and finally War of the Robots an Italian scifi romp https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gb7rNA8rjCY

Peter Anthony Anderson

Wild Zero. It's less space and more alien invasion with zombies, but it's a very fun movie! The way they destroy the alien mothership at the end is absolutely insane! I don't want to spoil it!

Peter Anthony Anderson

You're in luck! I actually think they did this one! I don't remember which episode it was though... :(

The Dreaded Rear Admiral

do all y'all actually *remember* Battlefield Earth? It's so long and dull that it's hard to even enjoy ironically.

Jess Donovan

The book is literally twice as long. don't worry I didn't support Scientology to buy it, got the Op shop edition way back before I knew anything about L Ron. Ucckk

Dustin Price

I forgot about The Core. I had to get a new tv after that one.

Jin Hadah

Only if they do the 4+ hour extended version for an extra dose of suffering

Jin Hadah

Circuitry Man! It's post-apocalypse earth rather than space, but it's got it all! Illicit microchip-based drugs, android love, super leeches, Vernon Wells after a horrifying accident with a soldering iron, who could ask for more?

parker burgess

They've already done the core. I'm not sure if you knew or not so I apologize if you did.

Dustin Hanson

How about Flesh Gordon the porn parody?

Nicholas Monter

Space Mutiny! It's honestly an enjoyably bad movie with grandma-daughter and Beefcake McHero

Nate McDonald

Not sure if this movie could be found to even watch but gay n words from outer space is a movie that was made. They don't say n words though, they use the actual word.

Amanda Horne

For me it is simply the best worst movie of all time

Hazel Cat Lady

MOONFALL!!! Do Moonfall you cowards! I've been watching it for hours and I haven't stopped screaming at the TV. I have no clue what's happening. Please make the moon make sense again.

Hazel Cat Lady

I don't think any of the leads of this movie were ever in a room together ever. Neither were the writers. Everyone was doing different drugs on different continents. Including me.

Total Absolutism

Battlefield Earth. Dear dark lord, Battlefield Earth. It's a bad adaptation of a book that was, itself, already bad! Really, really bad!

Single Malt Sinner

The Ice Pirates (1984). Please, please, please. For the love of all that’s indecent and unholy.

TheDingoThatTookYourBaby

I don't know if it counts as a space movie. But "Dr Strange: Multiverse of Muddiness" has to be a contender.

Sean Harmon

I’ve always been partial to ‘Battle Beyond the Stars’ from 1980. Richard Thomas (John Boy Walton), was in it, and a rather mouthy ship :)

Robert Hullah

Suburban Commando. It's a Hulk Hogan movie, what more need be said.

Woodsy Boredom

Battlefield Earth is legitimately painful to watch. The cinematography alone is atrocious. However, the alien movie I hate most is Contact. It starts out pretty good and the last third is such a total betrayal of its whole plot. Do we make "Contact" with aliens? Only Jodi Foster does, after an interlude that confirms multiple conspiracy theories. Do the aliens look cool? No they are look like Jodi Foster's deceased father. Why? So she'll be less freaked by meeting them. Ha. And does the world believe that she met aliens? Only those that have faith. I hate Contact. Stupid fucking movie. It is not actually about meeting aliens.

David

Would Pacific Rim count?

חנן

Iron Sky - what if there were nazis on the moon?

חנן

Also, can’t say this is a “bad” movie, but it is eminently “B” movie: The American Astronaut - it’s an autobiographical musical space western (and is glorious)

Mama Llaga

"The Man Who Saved the World" ( https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0182060/ ) is also known as "Trukish Star Wars" on account of how they filmed some scenes with the original playing as the background. The even stole some of the Indiana Jones score so they couldn't be accused of JUST stealing from Star Wars. "Battle Beyond the Stars" ( https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0080421/ ) has George Peppard as drinky-cowboy-Han-Solo, and genuinely seems to have been a sincere attempt at a space opera.

Mama Llaga

I nearly forget the perfect GAM bad-space-opera, "Starcrash" (1978)! Not only does it have David Hasselhoff... it's got MARJOE Gortner as their Luke Skywalker knock-off! Freakin' MARJOE!!! https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079946/

Ben Wilcox

The Last Starfighter! 80's cheesy Star Wars-knockoff at its finest!

Zac King

Lost in Space (1998)

Nicolette

This island earth!!!

L. C.

Moooonfaaaaallllll. :-)

Eric Johnson

Prometheus. There are plenty of other answers on this post but this is the only true one. It's so bad that Skeptics Guide to the Universe did an episode on how bad the science behind it was. Plus there's some not-so-subtle Christian symbolism in it, so it's technically God Awful.

Doncor Leonie

Moonfall. PLEEEAASSEEEEE!!! It's got so many rotten Easter Eggs for everyone. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!

john Morrow

Robert Preston nuff said

badgertide

omg, Battlefield: Earth!

john Morrow

That ending is straight out of the book. In fact they improved it.