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Gam Bonus 011: The Phantom Menace (Patreon)

Published:
2017-03-29 17:54:39
Edited:
2023-12-05 16:27:07
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

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Content

This week we review one of the gravest cinematic disappointments in human history, the film that everyone loves to hate, and (in my opinion) the fourth worst movie in the Star Wars cinematic franchise.

Comments

TwistyPretzel

Thank you to Tim for making these collections!! This is so cathartic - my oldest was about 3 when he saw this movie. It became his obsession and we watched it through the day every day for like 6 months.

Zach Van Stanley

I have to defend John Williams in that last song. The parade song is actually a sped up and pitched version of the emperor’s theme. So it’s a subtle cue that even though things seem good, something sinister is happening

Sparrow

Everyone is entitled to one shitty movie they loved before puberty.

Jessica Eastvold

I have to clarify. I know this is almost a decade old post. But the magnolia edit. The aliens aren’t speaking gibberish. They are speaking Spanish and then distorted audio. 😂 I speak Spanish. It’s hilarious to watch it 😂

Tala Hobballah

"No Muslims are listening" Only took 9 years Noah muwahaha

Chonkerooni

The creepy flirting between Anakin and Padmé makes a lot of sense considering Lucas really wanted Indy to be involved with a 14 year old Marian 😬

Tan Jacket EDC

How the hell do I get this to work on my Apple podcasts. I’m going insane having to log in every time I have to pause the show

AK

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Ellemelt

Aaaaaa! But what are the three worst SW movies? Let's start a nerd fight!

Carol McGreevy

Only fourth worst? Lies. Lies and deceit.

GodAwful

Worst: Attack of the Clones. 2nd worst: Return of the Jedi. 3rd worst: The Force Awakens. I reserve the right to change my rankings once I see Rogue One.

AK

Dunno mate, pregnant to twins running down corridors? The movie so bad I honestly can't remember how it's called without googling?

Lawrence Mahmood

But but Attack of the Clones has all that great comedy, like the line about sand being gritty...it's hilarious.

Ellemelt

I always have a hard time, because I love the moviegoing experience. There isn't a Star Wars movie I didn't love for at least a week, just for the spectacle. That said, I have to disagree with Jedi being in the top four while revenge of the sith isn't. RotJ is maybe the worst of the original trilogy, but it was still good, IMO.

Nolan Tenholder

Why do you think the Force Awakens is worse then the Phantom Menace?

Fel Martins

In my opinion, Phantom is the worst. It's a movie that could've been skipped and very little would have been missed. I think they should've just started with Episode 2 and made Episode 3 into two parts. Really play up the rise and fall of Anakin. But the prequels aren't that great. Though they at least tried to do something different. Episode 7 felt like the Episode 4,5 and 6 got thrown in a blender and served back to us.

Ellemelt

Which was a huge improvement over the last three movies to have been miscarried into the public sphere, sadly. I think people just love TFA in the way that my parents loved my "most improved citizen" award in the third grade.

Mark Siefert

YES! Another blow has been struck for cinematic decency against the millennial shills who have been trying to rehabilitate the prequels!

Samuel Shearer

Please do the Hulk Hogan movie No Holds Barred.

SquickRetro Jae Surreal Sapphire

Laughed so hard at work. Sure I got looks from coworkers. Btw we prefer the term alternative Jedi and not Sith. Thank you very much. Suggestion for Leonard part 6.

Thabiso Mhlaba

I was maybe 11 when Phantom Menace came out and I liked it. I also appreciated the next 2 movies. My favourite characters were Amidala and Darth Maul. Later in my teens I decided to watch the original Trilogy and struggled to sit through it. It's like trying to watch Cheers after years and years of TV sitcoms. You see where they all got it from, but in its most primitive form. I am absolutely in love with the Star Wars Universe and the lore and many of the characters. I'm just not as ready to throw away the prequels or any of the new stuff because I think it has value. I really liked Force Awakens and was ok with Rebel One.

Bfahome

I was confused when you talked about CGI Yoda because I definitely remembered him as a puppet, but apparently they replaced him in later versions and I've only ever seen the original VHS version. The thing is it's actually a step up from the puppet, which looked like the shrunken head of Jack Nicholson. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxaZxpNTm8A" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxaZxpNTm8A</a>

Deadeye Nick

Eli, did you really quote your father saying "boyo?" A quintessentially Irish-American term. Not cool. That's our word.

John Copeland

Funniest episode yet. Fucking splendid.

John Copeland

Apparently Terrence Stamp did voice work for little money on exchange for a special gift. The gift ended up being a child's stencil set. See above link.

Carlos Marchi

The prequels are "entertaining" to watch. Mostly in a twisted "look at that car crash... oh... there ain't no way someone survived that" way of entertaining... All the while, Jar-Jar whispers into your ear: "how wude," as life slowly fades away from the Star Wars franchise still stuck in the wreckage.

Matthew Maxon

I nearly fell off a fucking ladder. Fuck you guys! :)

SadakoTetsuwan

Fan edits prove that there was a decent movie trying to get out. If you want to delve into that part of the fandom, look up the MagnoliaFan edit 'Episode 1: Balance of the Force'. They change all of the alien dialogue to be gibberish like in the originals so they can subtitle in literally half of the film to make it more interesting. Another fan edit (maybe The Lone Gungan edit? I don't remember) moved the space battle and the stupid Gungan fight to the beginning of the movie so the climax was only the lightsaber fight and the attack on the palace, etc. Hell, there was a version inspired by the Topher Grace cut where they combined all 3 prequels into one movie, and literally the only thing they kept from Episode 1 was the Darth Maul fight, which they edited into one continuous battle instead of cutting away to stupid bullshit ever 30 seconds.

RobotScarecrow

Just got to the "Storming the Castle" scene where, in a world that has jetpacks, VTOL spaceships, and Hover-EVERYTHINGS, The "Heroes" have to get up one floor using ROPES.

Brendan Horn

Any chance of getting Airbender as a bonus bonus episode?

Kyle Caithness

This was fantastic. I hate to admit it, but I was only 6 or 7 when this came out and I loved Jar Jar... Never quite realized how wrong I was (mainly because I've avoided these movies like the plague since the third one came out) until listening to this. ... Ew. I used to like this shit.

Simo Hyttinen

I love taking weepy wank-shits when my fiance isn't in the mood. You guys described my daily life.

The Gray Hunter

Oh god..... the Samuel L Jackson riff had me on the floor! So much shit I'd forgotten about, especially my astonished reactions when I first went to see this dreadful film. When Jackson appeared I spontaneously bust into laughter in the theater. No one else but me gaffawed loudly (they were still in shock at how bad this thing was... no doubt) I also remember when Jarjar is snatching food from the table with his tongue someone in the theater yelled "USE THE FORK!" What a disaster this film is..

John Copeland

I hope they do episodes 2 and 3.this one show was worth the several months patronage even if it was the only one.

Max Winfrey

Please episode 2 and 3 next!!!

Aaron Flenser

I cant for the life of me find the video of the shirtless guy explaining the galactic senate that Eli was talking about

Mark Siefert

"It seems to me that you want me to kill my father and fuck my sister." No, it's more like that George Lucas makes this shit up as he goes along without any regard to story logic and continuity. Remember, this is the guy largely responsible for Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

KRiS

I can't either. I keep looking but I'm only coming across different kind of 'politics of Star Wars' videos...and an interesting prediction of how Episode 9 is going to end. And, holy cow, how did I not know there were a ton of Trump vs. Clinton Star Wars videos out there?

KRiS

This was so enjoyable it deserved a 3rd listen-through. The banter between all three of you is prodigious and perfectly priceless.

Dustin Nelson

Do Episode 7, few things could make me happier

Matty B

Great episode. So glad the guys acknowledged that the final fight was really inspired, though probably by accident. Wish you had a little directed love towards Ray Park, the actor who portrayed Maul (dialogue​ was by some other guy who was far more British). Stunt guys need more recognition.

Roger H.

I really enjoyed this episode but I could tell that the movie was delivering more pain than pleasure when you rewatched it. Regardless, you guys made me laugh, and we all appreciate the fruits of your suffering. ALL PRAISE SHAKARA-KIKI!

David S.

Odd as it may be when I was younger and had to go to Catechism/C.C.D. one of the teachers there insisted that the force made a strong analogy for the holy spirit. All the kids attending classes of that grade were taken to cafeteria where we watched one of the star wars movies except with them pausing it every 10 minutes to explain how what we'd seen since the last pause related to Christianity and the bible. It was a load of crap. 58:30/1:22:00 Just putting this here for my own reference in case I need to hear Eli doing British Darth Maul, again.

Savoir Fae

Not gonna lie... terrible movie, but "dinosaurs and disco balls'? THAT'S a party I want to go to.

Chris M

I just became a Patron and the secular reviews are great. I also had midnight tickets to this and still remember seeing it. My brother and I both looked sideways at each other when the Neimoidians first did their Fu Manchu accent. It was all downhill from there. When the "What's the name of that droid?" scene and the theater ERUPTED into applause, I literally said "Is this fucking kidding?!"

Autumn Cedar

One good movie? The Orig Trig is fucking great.

jessah with the demon tits

Fuck you guys, the sea monster scene was and is one of my favorite scenes, bar Jar Jar's stupid comments.

Corey Hardin

The only way I can handle movies with Jar Jar in them is to pretend the fan theory of him being a Sith Lord and manipulating all the events in the background