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An Impractical Guide to Godhood ch 35 unbetaed - Titan's Game (Patreon)

Published:
2025-07-26 07:55:59
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

The time has come. The mighty Penguin Army is on the march to inflict decisive retribution on the Emus. March, sons of the Ice!

This may be the beginning of the end for many immortals.

Welcome, Fools, to the Titan's Game. Volunteering for this grand carnage is optional. Failing to entertain the Titans is not.

As it is a glorious but typical day, the betaed chapter 34 will follow in another post.

Comments

Ravenext

Damn, can't believe I will say this but hats off to you, Zeus.

Tinashe

I haven’t read it yet but that first comment go me excited 😭😭

Zombie45

so bunch of things to say about this chapter, firstly Zeus kicked ass, major respect for the King. second, I thought when the titan king was invoked and a blonde boy appeared it was going to be Luke since he was the vessel in canon. thirdly did not expect Echidna to be the 10th member, when the 10th was first described I thought it might Mnemosyne or even Rhea not Echidna. fourthly very curious about the 11th and 12th thrones.

Jeremy

So still am expecting Heracles to be a member of the Coalition... Before this chapter I would say Zeus and Artemis were in competition for the worst deity. Now though? Artemis has quickly surpassed Zeus, since we at least have some perspective on his trauma and been shown some good qualities. Artemis on the other hand just seems to be a monster in divine skin. I am rooting for her survival as a mortal, since her death would probably destroy Apollo and Zeus.

Jeremy

Might be misremembering the beginning, but Luke should have been safe. The Titan King might be either dead or powerless to bring the souls from Practical Guide over.

Zombie45

yes the titan king is gone but that's where my mind went to when I read a blonde boy appeared

Jeremy

Now that I think about curious what Hades' concern is in regards to Python's ploy three best guesses... (1) The game is only involving the Sun and the Moon, so if Artemis and Apollo fall would that make it easier for a usurpers to claim their other domains? So Python might be shooting for other Gods to rise? (2) Since I think all member of the Coalition have not been revealed. So trying to get a member on the Council? (3) Symbolically Artemis and Apollo's mom is dead, but Zeus is still around to protect them. Maybe a ritual to cripple or kill Zeus that relies on mirroring Artemis' broken oath.

Forgottenone

I thought it was Luke and remember the titan of time gave away three pieces of himself. I didn't remember what Luke got so I was like uh this could be bad. Then the lightning showed up. I was O this is really bad for the coalition, after all someone has to be the Titan Kings page.

Forgottenone

Well at least someone gave the rulebook to the person going to be put in charge fixing this mess. Honestly Grace should be happy that the other two didn't show up. Her father could stop being king of the gods. The moment the snake became a referee I wouldn't join unless I had my own Oracle. Wait we do but we are not using her abilities! I think the Sire main plan is to go after all the oracle's while the guardian is trapped in the game.

El

Really really nice and it is as blood as I though it will be. A lot of interesting things you revealed, especially with the unnamed cupbearer of Zeus (I am really curious about that and how that trauma affected him and his relationship with his…fourth weddings - if you count Nike). I am really curious about how the inclusion of the Lords of the Coalition will play in the Game and about the identity of the others members - for me it’s not Hyperion and Theia since they were imprisoned during most of the Coalition existence.

Sagewizard89

Damn, Zeus really went and showed everyone why he's the King and not Hades or Poseidon. I also really like that the "bad" guys get their characters explored in detail. Sooo many fics just repeat, "Zeus is bad and evil. Please read and be enraged" every single chapter and it gets boring pretty fast. I think this is the first time I've seen him depicted very realistically and not as some comically evil, hilariously powerless guy. He's an asshole, but you can see why, and so many authors fail at this. Kudos!

Antony444

Yes. Zeus is...assuredly arrogant, unpleasant, and has a lot of flaws, including a rampant paranoia. But he is the King of Gods for a really important reason: he's a demon on the battlefield. He beat Kronos. The only one who can boast having defeated him at his height is Typhon. One-on-one, Zeus is an incredibly tough opponent that most Gods don't last a second against.

Antony444

Yes, in comparison to their genitor, the younger Olympians...do not have that many reasons to be in 'club badass'. They did not fight during the Titanomachy...and it is felt in their deeds and reactions.

Antony444

Necessary connection: in this timeline, Zeus' marriage to Nike is his seventh wedding, not his fourth. As for the Cupbearer...we are going to examine it a lot, beginning next chapter.

Antony444

More 'the rulebook as they know it'. It's more or less everything Zeus and Hades were able to obtain, based on Zeus' experiences and everything. One has to be reminded the Olympians arrived at the end of this thing. Nice guess, but Python has to swear a non-intervention oath as long as he is a Referee...

Antony444

Lol, well, it is your privilege to do so... Obviously, Artemis doesn't appear to have any redeeming points so far. Unfortunately for her, karma has arrived, and it is not going to be easy. Unlike Apollo, after all, she has never experienced what it means to be mortal.

Antony444

Thanks for the enthusiasm, then!

Antony444

Yes, I thought this was going to be the reaction of a lot of readers...

Antony444

1) That entirely depends in what kind of usurper you are. If you hate music and poetry, I am really sorry to inform you that your chances to claim the Domains related to it are close to ' a cold day in hell' or something lower than that. 2 and 3) Good ideas...but those are not the Emus you're seeking, Padawan.

El

I’m sorry, did you just said it’s his seventh ? Who the heck did he marry ? Because I’ve only got four so far : Echidna, Metis, Hera and Nike (five if he married the Cupbearer).

Benjamin Mages

Question, maybe I just missed it, but why didn't Zeus just murder Python after throwing the rest of the Coalition members in the gate? Is it like the adjudicator games where the referee is untouchable until it's over?

Antony444

Lack of time to defeat Python. The Serpent was going to seal Apollo away, and then Zeus would have the choice of leaving or participating in the Titan's Game. The King of Gods chose to leave, since Python is way too dangerous as an opponent to be fought on a time limit, especially one which promised to be incredibly short.

imperialguard82

Were Kallisto and Atalanta also prisoners when they was brought to the thrones? Also congratulations, I have not as fired up from an Arc as this one in ages. Of course to really enjoy I will it probably have to wait until this time next year for you to have made a decent chunk of it.

Antony444

No, they weren't. The prisoners were Apollo, Artemis, Caligula, Julia Drusilla, Atlas, and Arachne...half of their numbers. Thanks for the support!

Yetsush

Great chapter! Loved how Zeus wrecked the traitors. Though I can't help but feel as though dumping so many into the Games was a way to deal with bloat, to lower the characters.

Yetsush

Oops, accidentally sent my comment before I asked any questions. With Hazel, did she still help Alcyoneus rise in this AU and how did she enter the Lotus Club? And in regards to the 2 hidden Coalition members, would Demeter be one of them? She's the only person I can think of that still acts weirdly than in Canon, enough to betray Olympus. And as an Olympian, her remaining hidden grants access to everything the council knows and does.

Antony444

My dear, the abundance of characters has a very cold and dreadful reason: there is an awful slaughter toll the moment the Titan's Games begin...

Antony444

Patience, young Padawan, all will be revealed in due time...

FusedBump96

Really enjoyed the chapter! Laptop died so had to read this off and on via my PC. ngl I kind of hope Perceus doesn't cave. I... kinda don't see the perks for him to get involved at this stage. All the players involved getting wiped as the Coalition and Olympus agree to bleed the other seems like kind of a good outcome? And really hoping some form of karma hits the seemingly pretty brainless huntresses. But also the Olympians who ordered their attendance and then... didn't ensure there was a command with a spine to ensure they actually participated? Sure they couldn't predict Prometheus' exact actions but surely there was a demi-goddess from Nike or literally any of the deities that could have been put as interim commander of the Huntresses but ultimately reporting to Percy? Like a circuit breaker/compromise pick or something. Like surely the self owns have to stop at some point.