Midnight Pals: Swamp (Patreon)

Elizabeth Broadbent: Submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of ink vineBroadbent: what if there was a magical lesbianBroadbent: in the swampEdward Lee: broLee: broLee: i want to know more about this swamp lesbianPatricia Highsmith: i too would like to know about this swamp lesbian

Broadbent: there's all sorts of mysterious things in a southern swampBroadbent: it's a spooky place where a strange lesbian might eat you if you wander past the dogwoods

Broadbent: so there's this girlBroadbent: she's all 'i'm a bisexual'Broadbent: 'i like boys and girls but girls slightly more'Broadbent: and she's the only bisexual in her shitty little hillbilly swamp townBroadbent: it's a lonely lifeBroadbent: forced to sit on counters kind of weirdly all by herself

Broadbent: now her mama's always warning her don't go in the swampBroadbent: cuz it's dangerous, that swampBroadbent: but then one dayBroadbent: guess what she does?Broadbent: she's going deep into that swampBroadbent: that wet messy ooey gooey musky soppy swampBroadbent: deeper and deeper into the sucking slurping sopping muckBroadbent: burrowing under the spongy moss, sliding into the sloppy dark waterBroadbent: shes got water in her crevasses

Broadbent: she goes into the swampBroadbent: and she meets the swamp lesbianBroadbent: her mama's always saying don't go in the swampBroadbent: but she's all try to understand mamaBroadbent: try try try to understandBroadbent: she's a magic lesbian

Broadbent: but then after meeting the swamp lesbianBroadbent: suddenly these weird tattoos appear on her bodyBroadbent: like a vine around her legsBroadbent: a vine with a real mind of its own

Broadbent: 'oh no' she thinks 'how will i, a girl who likes both boys and girls but girls slightly more, explain this mysterious tattoo to my close-minded town?'Broadbent: 'and also my bisexuality'Broadbent: 'how will i explain that'

Broadbent: anyway spoilerBroadbent: turns out these close-minded podunk townees are more accepting of one thing than the otherBroadbent: so now she's got no choiceBroadbent: but to fuck shit upMary Shelley: yeah YEAH

Shelley: now we're talkin!Shelley: fuckin' fuck shit up!Shelley: breakin the law! breakin the law!King: wow mary you really like this bisexual disaster fucking shit upShelley: she's very relatable