Midnight Pals: Dad Jokes (Patreon)

Stephen King: so i was down at the bookstore and they were throwing my books around Dean Koontz: oh no! why were they doing that? King: well dean Koontz: they could damage the books! King: well dean Koontz: or hurt someone! King: well dean Koontz: or King: let me finish dean

King: i was all 'what's going on?' and then IT hit me Koontz: why were they doing it? King: well IT hit me Koontz: King: see, IT is the title of one of my King: oh for pete's sake King: the rest of you got it didn't you?

King: the rest of you got it, right? Barker: yeah we got it Barker: it just wasn't funny King: King: oh come on clive i mean i thought it was a little funny Poe: it was very amusing steve Barker: don't encourage him edgar Barker: he's only going to get worse

Stephen King: well, don't worry, i got plenty more! Joe Hill: dad, please, i'm tired King: hi tired, i'm dad Barker: hahaha Barker: ok now THAT ONE was funny Poe: really? "hi tired i'm dad?" that's the one that does it for you? Barker: it was all in the delivery haha

King: IT hit me? get it? IT? King: oh never mind, please yourself then Elon Musk: [rising from bushes] eyyy stephano king King: oh no Musk: itsa funny joke no? Musk: i lika da jokes eyyy!

King: well, elon, i guess we finally have something in common King: no one likes either of our jokes Musk: eyyyy whatsamatta for you, stephano king? everybody lovesa my jokes! Musk: i maka da joka, alla my fans applaud, they clappa da hands! Musk: they say "masterful gambit sir"

Musk: i ama very funny! mama mia, alla my jokes, they very good! Musk: let datta sink in! King: Koontz: Barker: Lovecraft: Poe: Musk's Toddler RP sockpuppet account: HAHA MASTERFUL GAMBIT SIR!!!

Musk: eyyy CHRISTINE say iffa da book falla offa THE STAND, you can CARRIE it to da REVIVAL in your CELL as THE SHINING example for THE DARK TOWER CUJO SKELETON CREW CYCLE OF THE WEREWOLF FOUR PAST MIDNIGHT PET SEMETARY RITA HAYWORTH AND THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION

King: sigh, i guess i'm just not cut out for comedy Poe: don't feel bad, steve, we can't all be kim newman Kim Newman: [bowtie spinning] good evening ladies and germs, i was on my way to this campfire when this guy told me he hadn't had a bite all week