Midnight Pals: Just askin questions (Patreon)

[mysterious circle of robed figures] JK Rowling: hello children Rowling: i'm back from my advissory role in the transs genocide Rowling: Obergruppenführer ssstarmer thought i had sssome real interessting new ideasss Rowling: well, real interessting old ideass actually Rowling: ssome real classsicss

Rowling: now back to busssinessss Rowling: my busssinesss being yelling at the transs on twitter Rowling: and bussssinesss iss good! Helen Joyce: dark lord! dark lord! Joyce: terrible news! Rowling: ssilence! let me do my dark bidding on twitter! Rowling: huh Rowling: it'ss quieter than ussual here

Joyce: the trans! they've fled twitter! Rowling: preposssterosss! they would never! Rowling: how will they get their daily dosse of disscoursse? Rowling: they can't ssurvive without it! Joyce: dark lord, i don't know! Joyce: they must be getting it... Joyce: somewhere else Rowling: imposssible!

Rowling: check everywhere! find them! Rowling: check the threadss about how transgender vs transssexual Joyce: they're not there! Rowling: check the threadss about how nonbinarys people are kaposs! Joyce: they're not there! Rowling: check the warhammer threadss! Joyce: they're not there!

Joyce: you know what this means, dark lord? Joyce: we did it! they've been eradicated! Joyce: not a single trans remains on twitter! Joyce: you'll never have to see or interact with a trans again! Rowling: Joyce: isn't this joyous, dark lord? Rowling: Joyce: isn't this Joyce: uh Joyce: dark lord?

Rowling: confound it! they flee twitter? they don't want to sssuffer my consstant abuses? Rowling: they deny me my ssport? Rowling: really, it's just another example of their inherent missogyny if you think about it

Rowling: wormtongue! wormtongue, come before me! Jesse Singal: yes mommy? Rowling: i charge you with a ssacred task, wormtongue Singal: mommy mommy yes i can do it mommy! Rowling: you must go unto bluessky and bring me some transs Rowling: mother hungersss

[on bluesky] Singal: hello? excuse me? Singal: isn't there anyone here who wants to have a civil debate? Singal: isn't there anyone here who wants to talk like rational adults? Singal: Singal: hello? Singal: Singal: Singal: Singal: isn't there anyone here who wants to answer my questions?

Singal: c'mon! Singal: come one! Singal: i'm just asking questions! Singal: doesn't anyone want to hear my reasonable concerns? Singal: doesn't anyone want to have a polite discussion? Singal: Singal: look i'll give you freaks until the count of three Singal: but then i'm going to talk to a manager!

Singal: c'mon! talk to me! Singal: yell at me! Singal: call me a worm! Singal: you love calling me a worm! Singal: YOU LOVE IT! Singal: please! Singal: [crying] i can't go back to mommy without screencaps! Singal: [crying] mommy needs her screencaps!

Singal: [hitching up belt] ok time to get tough Singal: no more mr nice contrarian! Singal: listen up you freaks and weirdos! Singal: you gross inhuman monsters! Singal: you second class citizens! Singal: you vile disgusting degenerate scum! Singal: Singal: Singal: Singal: i'm the victim here!

Singal: why won't you even hear my reasonable questions? Singal: i've got so many! Singal: i've been asking them for a decade and i come up with more every year! Singal: it's easy when you never intend to find answers