Midnight Pals: The Passion of Jesse (Patreon)

[mysterious circle of robed figures] JK Rowling: hello children Rowling: what newsss, wormtongue? Rowling: how goes the infiltration of bluesssky? Jesse Singal: mommy mommy Singal: it was SO HARD Singal: the trans were SO MEAN Singal: they all blocked me! Singal: i was almost ignored to death!

Rowling: you poor child Singal: but i did it mommy Singal: every single person on the site told them to ban me Singal: but i'm way more important than any of them! Singal: so i can stay! Rowling: excellent! Rowling: door'sss open, boysss!

Singal: mommy i fought so hard for you Rowling: i know you did, jesssse Singal: i did it all for you mommy Rowling: yess you did great jessse Singal: i asked all those questions just for you mommy Rowling: yeah thats great Singal: i had all those reasonable concerns just for you mommy

Singal: mommy mommy the trans were so mean, they said mean things about me on the internet Singal: i don't know how they could do that! Singal: they just don't understand how much it hurts to have people say mean things about you on the internet! Singal: they just can't relate!

Singal: it hurts when people say mean things about me on the internet! Singal: the trans don't understand Singal: they have their hard reptilian hides to protect them Singal: but i'm not a monster like them, i'm a person! Singal: i have feelings!

Singal: mommy they were so mean Singal: my feelings are so hurt Singal: kiss it and make it better mommy Helen Joyce: do we Joyce: do we really need to keep this guy around? Rowling: patience, ssssisster, we must bide our time Joyce: you don't have ANYONE else who could do this? Singal: mommy mommy

Joyce: i mean, we don't have anyone else who could launder transphobia into respectable liberal discourse? Joyce: anyone at all Rowling: well i really thought tatsuya ishida was going to be ready for prime time by now Rowling: but we missed that window Rowling: now he's overripe

Rowling: oh helen you don't understand Rowling: sure, jessse might look like a sniveling worm, a nasty crawling slithering little shit, a spineless craven buffoon Rowling: but damn if he isn't the best reasonable concern haver in the business

Singal: mommy mommy they were so mean to me Singal: i was unfairly judged, just like a child molester is unfairly judged! Rowling: Rowling: Rowling: Rowling: