Midnight Pals: MOONFLOW IS COMING (Patreon)

Bitter Karella: well well well Karella: guess who's got her debut horror book coming out next week King: Poe: Lovecraft: Barker: Koontz: Karella: c'mon guess King: Poe: Lovecraft: Barker: Koontz: Karella: it shouldn't be this hard

Karella: c'mon you know the answer Karella: you know, the book MOONFLOW? Karella: the novel that's "delight from start to finish" (Literary Hub)? Karella: a "rollicking, trippy ride" (Library Journal)? Karella: an "intensely entertaining novel that fans of mushroom horror will gobble up" (Booklist)?

Karella: you know, that "hilarious psychedelic orgy of a novel" (Publishers Weekly)? Barker: yeah but was it a starred review? Karella: Karella: one second, i'll check Karella: OH! Karella: GUESS WHAT Karella: IT WAS

Karella: so anyway Karella: guess who's got Moonflow debuting in stores for purchase for cash money on Sept. 2? Poe: King: Lovecraft: Barker: Koontz: Karella: jesus christ Karella: the answer is strongly implied by my insufferably smug tone

Karella: c'mon Karella: c'mon guess Koontz: is it Koontz: is it you? Karella: finally! Karella: jesus even dean figured it out Barker: who are you again Karella: i'm a real horror author for really reals Karella: i can totally be here if i want Barker: Barker: uh huh

Karella: in fact, if you go to your local bookstore TODAY, you might even see my book (MOONFLOW) right next to the shelf of stephen king titles Karella: clearly placed there to indicate its quality King: they're shelved in alphabetical order Karella: Karella: that really hurts coming from you steve

Karella: Moonflow premieres Sept 2 Karella: that means you have less than a week left to preorder it Karella: sure, you could go down to the store and buy it when it comes out Karella: but that's a real chump move Koontz: gosh! I don't want to be a chump Karella: that's right dean Karella: you don't

King: but what about those of us who prefer our narratives in audio form? Karella: well you're in luck my friend Karella: its also available in audio book form, expertly narrated in the sultry dulcet tones of professional actress Venus Rose Fisher Karella: really, you have no excuse NOT to buy it

King: but where can I find Moonflow? Karella: i'm glad you asked Karella: you can purchase moonflow right now at this link https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/bitter-karella/moonflow/9780316581936/ King: but what if you're british? Karella: GODDAMNIT DO IT HAVE TO HOLD YOUR HAND THE WHOLE WAY Karella: FIGURE IT THE FUCK OUT

King: wow! moonflow sounds great! i think everyone should buy it! Poe: absolutely! that sounds like a wise choice Mary Shelley: Shelley: the fuck is going on in here Karella: nothing Shelley: this is starting to feel kinda john barthy Karella: [sweats] Shelley: you know how i feel abou