Midnight Pals: Black Phone 2 (Patreon)

Joe Hill: but if you think THAT'S scaryHill: wait until you hear about the tale of the black phone 2Hill: oh hero, named FinnHill: like Stranger Things!Hill: is now in the 80sHill: like Stranger Things!

Hill: but get readyHill: cuz the sequel is going to be even more KING-ESQUEBarker: does it take place in maineHill: NOHill: i mean that it harnesses the power of modern American myth-makingBarker:Hill: there's a girl on a horse

Hill: there's going to be MORE psychic kids with prophetic dreamsHill: MORE bluecollar alcoholic dadHill: and this timeHill: i'm throwing in some sanctimonious ChristiansPoe: truly joe hill is our more king-esque writerKing: that's my boy!!!

Hill: so after defeating the grabber (see black phone 1- ed.)Hill: finn is having trouble adjusting to normal life againHill: but what he doesn't know is that the saga of the black phone isn't overHill: because the grabber is back from hellHill: and he's grabbing again

Hill: so this guy ernie invites the psychic sister to a Duran Duran concertHill: you know, Duran Duran?Hill: that famous band from the 80s?King: you know they're still around?King: you should get them to do the soundtrack

Hill: well i don't think that duran duran would be right for thisKing: they just did a whole Halloween albumKing: really spooky stuff!King: you could use some of those songsHill: dad, i have a soundtrack in mindKoontz: i like the song they did about the wolf

King: oh yeah, hungry like the wolf?Koontz: i am kinda hungry, now that you mention itHill: OH MY GODHill: WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT DURAN DURANBarker: her name is rio and she-Hill: CHRISTBarker: ha ha ha

Joe Hill: they'll be gone for two weeksKing: at a Duran Duran concert?Hill: no! they're going to a camp in the mountains!Poe: wait, is the duran duran concert at this camp?Hill: no! it's unrelated!Hill: ernie is taking them there, tho

Barker: the guy who invited her to the Duran Duran concert?Hill: yesBarker: so the guy who invited the sister to the Duran Duran concertBarker: shows up in front of their houseBarker: and the sister is all "bye, we're going somewhere"Barker: and we're supposed to know that it's NOT to the Duran Duran concert?Hill: yesHill: why are you all so obsessed with Duran Duran?Hill: they haven't even been any good since Medazzaland

Mary Shelley: you fuckin take that back, joe hill!!!Shelley: you fuckin' take that back right now!!Shelley: i saw them in at the Soverign Bank Avena in Trenton, New Jersey 1999 and THEY ROCKED!!Barker: oh i did not know mary was a duraneeBarker: that was a twist i was not anticipating