Midnight Pals: Firefly Returns (Patreon)

Joss Whedon: greetings whedonistas and whedonistos!Clive Barker: who're you?Whedon: i'mWhedon: i'm joss whedon!Whedon: c'mon, you remember me!Whedon: i was everyone's woke 90s bae!

Barker: hm doesn't ring a bellWhedon: c'mon!! i was huge! i made firefly!Barker: oh yeah? and what have you done since then?Whedon: i did that show about keeping mind-wiped hotties as slave spiesWhedon: then i mumble mumble mumbleWhedon: anyway lately i've been following this cybersmith guy on tumblr and i think he really has some interesting ideas

Whedon: you guys gotta remember me!Whedon: remember "bored now?"Whedon: remember "curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal?"Whedon: remember "that happened?"

Barker: OhhhhhhBarker: now i remember youWhedon: yes!Barker: joe whedon!Whedon:Barker: ha ha ha

Barker: look everyone it's joe whedonPoe: clive don't make fun of his nameBarker: oh yeah i definitely wouldn't want to make fun of joe whedonBarker: and his totally real, not made up nameBarker: ha ha ha

Whedon: actually um it's jossWhedon: it's joss whedonBarker: yeah i knowBarker: why are you here joeWhedon: great news everyone!Whedon: firefly is back!Piers Anthony: it is?!Whedon: noWhedon: not like that

Whedon: i'm talking about the less rapey fireflyAngela Carter: how much less rapeyWhedon: only about 5% as many rapes as anthony's fireflyWhedon: they're done real classyWhedon: as only the most feminist man of 1995 can do them

King: whoa! firefly is back?!King: that's huge! that was everyone's favorite show 20 years ago!King: it's like give shiny things to weasels day came early!

Whedon: i know you're all excited for the return of the most feminist man of 1995Angela Carter: weren't you outed as a sex pest?Whedon: like i saidWhedon: the most feminist man of 1995!Whedon: c'mon guysWhedon: why all the hostility?Whedon: you all loved firefly!Angela Carter: there's beenCarter: a reassessmentWhedon: whatWhedon: no!Carter: almost a referendum, if you willCarter: i am afraid so, joss

Carter: in hindsight, it seems like firefly was just lost cause mythos in spaceWhedon: b-but the quips!Whedon: you all love my quips!Carter: there's been a reassessment on the quips tooWhedon: NO!

Carter: also firefly was strangely white considering the supposed in-universe Chinese cultural hegemonyWhedon: ok maybe butWhedon: consider thisWhedon: it was feminist!Carter: i'm getting to that

Whedon: what an inglorious fate for the most feminist man of 1995!Barker: oof tough break, joeWhedon:Barker: ha haBarker: ha ha ha