Midnight Pals: Concert (Patreon)

[mysterious circle of robed figures]JK Rowling: hello childrenRowling: i'm really in a bad mood right now because issssuess with the new harry potter tv ssseriesssKathleen Stock: ah yes i heard about the on-set bullyingStock: someone should turn all those bratty kids into blueberries!Rowling:Rowling: ok um

Rowling: no i don't care about thatRowling: the on-sset bullying is not what upssetss meStock: then what, oh dark lord?Rowling: have you sseen nick frost as hagrid?Rowling: he looksss like a nerd!Rowling: i disstinctly told HBO "NO NERDSSS!"

Maya Forstater: dark lord i have news that will bolster your spirits!Rowling: isss it about that little floating nonbinary library alien that only you can ssee and hearTala: hello, dum-dums!Maya Forstater: they're here right now, dark lord!Rowling: uh huh ssure

Rowling: sso did you finally defeat that nonbinary library alienForstater: no but any day nowForstater: i'm sure we'll vanquish them for good!Tala: before you get up for that final snack, i want you to know i'll be right back! HA!

Forstater: this isn't about the nonbinary library alien that only i can see and hear, oh dark lordRowling: oh no? you got a new bit?Forstater: yes oh dark lordForstater: we heard there was a trans benefit concertForstater: so julie bindel and i bought tickets to go see itRowling:Forstater: but only so that we could complain about it!Rowling: oh good

Forstater: julie bindel and i infiltrated the trans benefit concertForstater: we heard the trans were listening to musicForstater: and we just couldn't stand for thatForstater: we did this at great personal risk to ourselvesForstater: because, as you know, if the trans had recognized us as the most famous terfs in the UKForstater: they might have done discourse at usRowling: that's the worsst

Rowling: good work my death eaterssRowling: what did you learnForstater: it was terrible! all these no-name performers that you've never heard of, like ian mckellan and the sugar cubesForstater: obviously because all the cool celebrities were too busy filming the new harry potter tv seriesRowling: yess yess that sscanss

Forstater: of course julie will back me upJulie Bindel: [tape over mouth] hmmForstater: or she would except she's still got that tape over her mouth as a symbolic protest against how gender critical views are censored by the trans loving british mediaBindel: mhhf!Rowling: very powerful sstatementRowling: never getss old