Midnight Pals: Baby Musk (Patreon)

Stephen King: [throws football] go wide, joe! Joe Hill: [catches football] I love you, dad!King: I love you too sonElon Musk:Musk: eyyyy whata the fuck

Musk: you thinka you winna this round, Stephano king?Musk: you thinka you betta than me just because you bambinos like-a you?Musk: I showa youMusk: eeeey looka here it’s baby elonMusk: [hastily putting on diaper] eeeey itsa me baby elon

Musk: eyyy it’s me baby elonMusk: I lova my papaMusk: my papa da smartest man inna worldMusk: he so smart he never getta caught roleplaying online assa his bambino

Musk: itsa mee baby elon!Musk: ima just a little bambino!Musk: a blanka slate!Musk: nothing inna my head!Musk: ima yours to molda twitter xXxFartknocker420xXx: did you know that black people have a goblin that lives in their heads and makes them do crimeMusk: mama mia!!!

Tiefling_Fucker6958537: did you know that trans people make their HRT out of the blood of Christian babiesMusk: mama mia!!!Musk: thata concerning!!!Musk: whya da media no report onna this

EldritchBitch4Eva8753: did you know that Italians aren’t even a real raceMusk: mama mia!EldritchBitch4Eva8753: 90% of crimes are actually done by ItaliansMusk: madone!!!EldritchBitch4Eva8753: they even have special crime “families!” families that just do crime!Musk:  itsa an outrage!

EldritchBitch4Eva8753: chef Boyardee is a plot to groom our children into the Italian lifestyleMusk: eyyy I don’ta know about thisEldritchBitch4Eva8753: one secEldritchBitch4Eva8753: [acquires blue check]Musk: mama mia!!! It musta be true!!!

Musk: mama mia we must enda da Italian minda virus!!!Musk: da Italians, mama mia, dey no compatible with a de civilization!!Poe: wait this EldritchBitch4Eva8753 screenname looks familiarPoe: howard did you radicalize elon against himselfLovecraft: [sweats] n-no