Midnight Pals: Large Adult Son (Patreon)

Eric Stenbock: hello midnight societyStenbock: i'm Count Eric Stanislaus StenbockStenbock: [producing life-size mannequin] and this is my son le Petit ComteThomas Ligotti:Ligotti:Ligotti: Ligotti:Stephen King: you're uhKing: really staring at that mannequin kinda intently there, tomLigotti: hm

Eric Stenbock: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the true story of the vampireStenbock: one sec, let me just get le Petit Comte comfortable firstStenbock: how are you doing le Petit ComteStenbock:Ligotti:Stenbock:Ligotti:Stenbock:Ligotti:Stenbock: he says he's doing good

RL Stine: hey does your puppet talkStine: my puppet talksStenbock: does my what talk?Stine: your puppetStenbock:Stenbock: you mean my son?Stine: yeah your puppet thereStenbock: Stenbock: never speak to me or my son every again

RL Stine: i just wanted to know if le petit comte talksRL Stine: [producing ventriloquist dummy] cuz knothead here talksRL Stine: especially when i drink a glass of waterRL Stine: watch he'll sing the old gray mareStenbock: how dare you

Stenbock: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the true tale of a vampireStenbock: it's the story of carmilla Sheridan Le Fanu:Stenbock: not THAT carmillaStenbock: a totally different carmilla

Stenbock: this carmilla story is not to be confused for sheridan la fanu's carmillaStenbock: for one thing, this isn't a lesbian vampire storyStenbock: it's a gay vampire storyStenbock: extremely gayBram Stoker: oh noAnne Rice: oh yes

Stenbock: so carmilla lives in a castle with her sexy brother gabriel and their dadStenbock: and she's narrating this story soStenbock: she's all "hey its me carmilla, let me tell you what i look like"Stenbock: "i'm just an average girl, but i think i'm pretty hot"Stenbock: "but boy my brother, damn what a smoke show"Stenbock: "pouty youthful mouth, tangled blonde locks, the whole deal"Stenbock: "you know how it is"

Stenbock: "so my brother was so kind and gentle, filled with nothing but love"Stenbock: "just loved animals"Stenbock: "and animals loved him"Stenbock: "he was a delicate cinnamon bun too good for this cruel bitch of a world"

Stenbock: "anyway this vampire comes to our castle"Stenbock: "and he's always hanging out with my brother"Stenbock: "but my brother is suddenly all sick and pale and doesn't have as much blood as usual"Stenbock: "suspiciously vampiric"

Stenbock: "anyway then my brother died and the vampire left, the end"Stenbock: what do you think of thatLigotti:Ligotti:Ligotti:King: thom it's not going to move, it's not realLigotti: hm