Midnight Pals: Trilby (Patreon)

George du Maurier: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of trilbydu Maurier: its about this girl named trilby that everyone lovesdu Maurier: cuz she's just the bestdu Maurier: sweet cinnamon bun too good for this world

du Maurier: let me tell you, you're gonna go gaga for trilbydu Maurier: she's so greatdu Maurier: what are you gonna do when the power of trilbymania runs over you

du Maurier: trilby, she's so beautiful. just the hottest woman you've ever seenEdward Lee: bro Lee: are we talking like [gestures to indicate huge tits]du Maurier: oh no no no nothing sordid like thatLee: brodu Maurier: please! i'm british!

du Maurier: trilby is the most delicate bloom of irish womanhood and possessing the fairest traits of her sexLee: brodu Maurier: by which i mean feetLee:du Maurier: and by god what feet does she haveLee:

du Maurier: trilby has the most beautiful, amazing, delectable feetdu Maurier: you just wanna eat 'em updu Maurier: and now with the new official trilby brand iced cream, you can!

du Maurier: lovingly crafted by the finest confectioners of old europe, the trilby popsicle is a treat for young and olddu Maurier: now YOU too can feel what its like to suck on trilby's perfect toesdu Maurier: just really slurp on em

du Maurier: the trilby foot popsicle, coming soon to a friendly's near youLee: broLee: how does it taste?du Maurier: try oneLee:Lee: yeah ok 

du Maurier: it won't hurt you but it might make you more powerful and muscular

du Maurier: i see you're all wearing your official brand trilby hatsdu Maurier: how do you all feel about trilby now?King: miladyKoontz: miladyPoe: miladyBarker: miladyLovecraft: milady

du Maurier: everybody loves the new trilby-inspired trilby hat!King: [tipping trilby] i do feel a certain joie de vivreKing: in factKing: i feel a song coming onKing: HIT IT, BOYS!King: A LITTLE BIT OF MONICA ON THE SIDE, A LITTLE BIT OF

du Maurier: but then trilby comes under the control of the evil svengalidu Maurier: you can recognize him by his big hook nose and that he's always carrying around big sacks of money with dollar signs on themLovecraft: wow this is the greatest villain of all time!

du Maurier: svengali hypnotizes trilby to force her to singdu Maurier: to go out on stage and performdu Maurier: with her big stinky feetdu Maurier: big stinky feet, you can see the smell lines coming off themdu Maurier: just the stinkiest