TV Multiverse 81 (Patreon)

Serena was the first one to break her silence. “You’re here because you want to make Chuck pay,” she said.

He didn’t stretch that moment long. “I’m assuming that Chuck is a middle name for the Bass asshole,” he said, then looked at Blair. “And, he’s a … friend.”

Blair nodded. Serena continued talking. “Charles Bartholomew Bass, actually,” she corrected. He shrugged. “How do you not know his full name?”

He shrugged. “I mean, in my defense, I just learned that he’s suing me for some stupid, frivolous lawsuit yesterday, and met his lawyers a few hours … well, several hours ago. Then, I had been distracted by something far more important. Why are you surprised that I don’t know him?”

“He’s Chuck Bass, who is a bona fide billionaire, and one of the most important people in Manhattan,” she said. “He’s always in the papers.”

He nodded. “And, I live in Los Angeles. Local New York media is not something I follow,” he said. “Naturally. I had no idea who Chuck is." He paused. “Well, I still don’t, other than knowing he owns Bass Industries, and he has a Bond Villain’s call sign as a middle name. A spoiled rich kid whose network is three thousand miles away from mine is hardly something that keeps me up at night.”

Serena blinked. "You … what? This is serious. Act like it."

He shrugged. “I mean, it really is not,” he said, radiating confidence, though he made sure to catch Blair’s gaze to convey he didn’t forget her.

Serena threw up her hands. "You are not hearing me—" she started, interrupted by her phone ringing.

She looked at it, and her face shifted. "It's … I have to take this. It's about the other thing. Don't go anywhere!" she said as she walked into the bathroom and closed the door.

Blair turned to him the moment the door closed, her expression shifting. “Is this…”

He opened his mouth, acting like he was about to refuse, only to stop. “You know what, it’s a fair question, so it deserves a proper answer, not just a deflection,” he said as he walked to the minibar and pulled out two bottles of water.

“Something stronger for me,” she said.

“No,” he refused sharply. “I don’t have emotionally significant talks while drunk. That’s how people become alcoholics.”

She seemed to be surprised at his assertion. “But you drink.”

“Of course I do. I like drinking. I also know the difference between social drinking and addiction,” he said as he sat next to her. “But, we have something more important to talk about.”

“Yes, we do,” she said, and paused.

He could have started explaining, but he deliberately did not. “I can start explaining, but I would like you to ask first.”

“Really? Isn’t it obvious?”

He nodded. “It is, but sometimes communication requires openness,” he said.

“That’s therapist talk.”

He nodded. “Likely. And a plumber would say stuffing chicken bones is bad for the pipes. Would you ignore it just because he’s an expert?”

“That’s not the same thing,” she said, her face getting cuter than her frustration turned intellectual rather than personal, also annoyed by his working-class metaphor.

He chuckled. “Isn’t it?”

She opened her mouth, she paused. “Don’t change the subject.”

“Ask your question.”

She took a deep breath. “Did you seduce me to get back at Chuck?”

“No. I didn’t know you were dating Chuck, or I was being sued by someone that went around calling himself Chuck,” he said, smooth and confident. Her expression shifted, hope battling with doubt. “And, since you’re a very beautiful and smart woman whom I would like to meet again in a context you will decide, I’ll give you more details. Remember how we first met?”

“You purchased my photo,” she said.

“I purchased a photo, along with several other items,” he said. “And, I want you to close your eyes and remember who started bidding for it first.”

She closed her eyes, then paused. “You did,” she said, her voice hopeful.

“Exactly. And the first time I learned of his name was when I met his lawyers, and I’m sure you can call Pearson Hardman and check for the meeting time, and see it’s hardly enough time for a grand conspiracy.”

She nodded. “Wait, you said you didn’t know I was dating Chuck, not that I was in a relationship. Means that you have researched me.”

He shook his head in amusement. “That’s mostly the body language, with a dash of makeup and your clothing choices. It’s not that hard to read.” He smirked.

Blair shifted. “Alright. Tell me about Serena, then. Dating or single?”

“It’s complicated,” he said, and Blair’s expression shifted back to anger. Her emotional volatility would have been troubling if he didn’t have the ability to handle her, but with that, it was far more entertaining. “I mean that literally. Give her a drink, chat with her for five minutes, then ask the question. She’ll say that it’s complicated. She probably has someone in her eyes, and aware that someone else is in love with her, but she’s also struggling to make a decision.”

Blair hummed, then she reached for her phone, and started showing several pictures. “Single. Dating. Single, but trying very hard. Dating, but looking to seduce someone else… that one, I have no idea. She clearly has no taste, so I can’t judge it without seeing her body language, single,” he said, answering every question she had.

Most of them, he didn’t even know from the show, but it didn’t matter. He wasn’t exaggerating when he said outfit and makeup choices revealed a lot about one’s dating status.

At least, to his sharp gaze.

“Fine. I accept that you’re sharper than I gave you credit for,” she said, like it was a favor.

He chuckled. “My turn,” he said. “Did you seduce me to help Mister Bond Villain?” he asked.

Her expression shifted. “How can you ask me that, of course not—“ she exploded, and he silenced her by stealing a kiss.

“I believe you,” he said. “I mean, I didn’t need to ask that question.”

“Why did you, then?”

He chuckled. “Again, asking questions is healthy. That way, you won’t suddenly start worrying about it when you see an idiot whispering that suggestion to me.”

“Why would I worry?” she asked, but her tone was telling. He didn’t bother answering. “So, what’s the deal between you and Chuck?”

“Amusingly, I don’t know. It’s why I wanted to meet him. He’s suing one of my businesses using a bogus trademark claim, and he’s using Pearson Hardman for it.”

Her eyes widened. “That’s a serious name.”

“Exactly, not the kind of weapon that you bring suing a small business unless you are trying to intimidate them,” he said. “I’m a silent partner, and he probably assumed that the operators were the sole owners, and that the sizable legal bill would scare them into surrendering.”

Blair sighed. “I hate to say it, but this sounds like Chuck.”

He nodded. “I mean, I’m not scared. There’s only so much you can rack up the bills for a trademark claim, especially since, unlike what his lawyers believed, they are not dealing with a small business with sloppy paperwork. I just wanted to meet with him because I wanted to learn why he was trying to bankrupt a small bakery,” he said.

Watching Blair’s expression shift was amusing, though he had to keep it hidden. “A bakery?” she said.

He nodded. “A small place, though it’s doing surprisingly well. A happy little investment.”

She paused. “Max’s Cupcakes?”

He nodded. “That’s the one.” She stayed silent. “Alright, I’m going to ask, because you look far too guilty for someone that just learned about it,” he said. He poked it, because he had already checked her phone and learned she didn’t order it.

She took a large sip of water. “I think Chuck is suing the bakery because of me,” she said, and told the story; which was long and had a lot of details he didn’t care about, including how she unsuccessfully tried to prevent the delivery, only to fail.

She wasn’t fully truthful. For example, the requested sabotage turned into a mere request for delay, but overall, she had followed the truth more than he expected.

“Did you ask Chuck to sue the bakery?” he asked.

She shook her head. “No. You have to believe. I can show you the messages and—“ she started, panicking. He silenced her with another kiss.

“I believe you,” he said once he pulled back.

She paused. “You believe me, really?” He nodded. "Just like that."

"Just like that."

She stared at him, and the distress was joined by disbelief, and a little hope. He knew she liked the idea of being taken at her word. Her reputation was mostly her fault, but that didn’t mean distrust stung any less. “Why? You barely know me?”

He chuckled. “First of all, we had talked for hours. You’ll be surprised how much you can learn from that. But more importantly, in addition to being a good wine taster and a god in bed, I’m a passable lie detector,” he bragged.

“A lie detector,” she said, then paused. “And, a god in bed? Isn’t it a bit too arrogant?”

He smirked. “I’m always open to another game,” he teased her, enjoying her blush. “But, seriously, I believe you because you’re telling the truth. It is obvious.”

Blair laughed, with amusement, but also some relief. It looked like not being blamed for something, even when she was in the right, felt unfamiliar to her. "You are the strangest man I've ever met," she said.

“Thank you.”

“That wasn’t a compliment.”

“I disagree,” he responded, chuckling, then kissed her again, and she responded. “But, I’ll take it as an insult happily as long as it comes with amazing kisses,” he added.

She pulled back. Before she could say anything more, Serena returned. “What’s going on?” she said, correctly reading the atmosphere. “Also, still not dressed?”

“We were discussing Ethan’s claim about him being able to tell if people are lying?”

Serena scoffed. “Fine. I had eggs for breakfast this morning."

Ethan chuckled. It was a lie, something that was challenging, but not impossible to pick. "I can't tell you," he said instead.

Blair frowned. "What? Why not?"

"It’s not magic, Blair. Serena has no investment in the fact one way or another. I read body language, and people don’t have tells delivering random one-liners and facts.”

“Fair,” Blair said. “How about we test it with something more interesting?”

Serena paused. “Interesting how?” she asked, her earlier hurry quick to be forgotten, but that didn’t surprise him. During the show, most of the problems they encountered happened due to their flighty attitude, always quick to jump into the next big thing rather than properly discussing and resolving their immediate problems.

“Well. We ask each other a few questions, and the lie detector here confirms. I’m sure you have a few that you want to ask,” Blair said, right between playful and smug.

“Fine,” Serena said. “Start.”

"Did the Marc Jacobs I gave you for your seventeenth birthday get lost in the dry cleaner like you said, or did you return it?"

Serena’s eyes revealed the answer. “Of course it got…” she started, but he had already shaken his head. She sighed. “Fine. I’m sorry. I didn’t like it, so I exchanged it for store credit.”

Blair chuckled. If the timeline had been closer, she might have taken it worse, but she was clearly amused by it. “I knew it. The next gift, I’m forcing it on you.”

“Fine,” Serena said. “If you could trade lives with one person in our old class for a week, who and why?"

That made Blair pause. “Probably Nelly Yuki,” she admitted, making Serena surprised. He merely nodded. He could guess the reason, as she was Blair’s closest experience with normalcy, with a family that cared more about their children than every single aspect of their reputation.

For Blair, it must sound like a fairy tale.

Serena, realizing her question veered heavier than she intended, calibrated quickly, and soon, they were asking moderately embarrassing questions, old clothes, old stories, some gossip.

Eventually, the expected question came when Serena relaxed, helped by the bottle of wine they opened. “The best sex you’ve had?” she said. Blair didn’t answer, but her blush and her gaze made it obvious. “Really?” Serena asked. “He’s that good?”

“How about I refresh the drinks while you gossip about me,” he offered.

“That would be awesome,” Blair said with a playful smile. He grinned and went to the other room, using the opportunity to send a few texts, checking with Caroline. Apparently, she had woken up near midnight.

They chatted a bit about the progress, and he shared the recording from Pearson Hardman, which helped her mood immensely.

[Achievement complete. Help Caroline by defeating and humiliating a bogeyman from her old life.

Challenge: Hard]

[+10 Perception

1 Random Gold Skill

1 Random Gold Reward]

The reward wasn’t surprising. Caroline always had the fear that her new life was in a bubble, and the powers from her old life could easily destroy anything she built. Seeing a legendary Senior Partner from Pearson Hardman humiliated helped her with that fear.

A monster from a horror movie would maintain its scary aura if it was defeated in a long battle. Watching him faceplant on a banana peel was different.

He could have eavesdropped on Serena and Blair’s talk easily, but he didn’t feel the need to. Even without the extra knowledge of the show, their attitude would be predictable.

Blair would brag about the amazing time he had to make Serena jealous, Serena would needle her about cheating on Chuck but not aggressively, considering her own history of cheating, which included Blair’s old boyfriend. All the while, Serena would assume Blair was lying about the full extent of his prowess but also feel curious, but not enough to make a move.

Yet.

In the end, Serena would promise Blair that she would keep what happened a secret and help her cover up … and, knowing her, she would reveal it in a week or two, either by accident or as part of another inane plot.

He chuckled. They were predictably self-destructive. Luckily, they were also fun, and he didn’t mind dealing with problem cases when they were sexy and fun.

Ten minutes later, Serena cracked the door open, and looked at him. The way her gaze wandered over his chest before dipping down to his crotch as if she was trying to see through its cover to confirm Blair’s stories. He was still texting Caroline, so Serena continued to watch him, assuming he didn’t notice her.

“You know, after a minute, the show needs a ticket,” he told her.

Serena paused, realizing that she was caught, but instead of apologizing or retreating, she opened the door, and walked toward him, trying to look confident and impervious. Her acting was decent, but nowhere near enough to convince him.

The fact that she was arrogant enough to try that against him, even after the little lie-detector trick, told so much about their dysfunction. Not to mention, just like her core friend group, she was needlessly confrontational. Frankly, it was the source of their biggest problem. Instead of pulling back and apologizing, they escalated to win.

“Don’t get it into your head. Blair is just using you to get back at Chuck for neglecting her, exaggerating everything in her mind,” Serena said. He smiled. Technically, it was not a lie because Serena believed what she was saying.

He shrugged. “If it happens, it happens.”

He could see that affecting her more because it was unpredictable. She was used to people either accepting her ‘wisdom’ or confronting her aggressively. Being dismissed was not something she expected.

“I’ll try to convince Chuck to drop the lawsuit. He listens to me. You just need to stay away from him or Blair. Maybe go back to Los Angeles, where things are simpler.”

He couldn’t help but feel amused at her belief that things in Los Angeles were simpler. Los Angeles was far worse than New York, especially under the combined impact of tech money and the Hollywood influence, but he didn’t bother explaining that to them.

The Upper East Side had its own way of looking at the world.

“I’ll probably follow Blair’s lead,” he said, once again dismissive. He could see Serena sighing, no doubt lowering her opinion of him.

Again, it was justified. Too many men fell for Blair’s charm, got weaponized against Chuck in a weird game, and were sacrificed once their usefulness came to an end.

She had no idea what he was capable of. He didn’t explain … as where was the fun in that.

Serena walked away, but to his amusement, he noticed a little trick. While closing the door, she slid a credit card to prevent it from closing properly.

Well, if she wanted a show, he would give her a show.

He walked back to the bedroom, and the sound indicated Blair was in the shower. He dropped his bathrobe and walked to join her, acting as if he hadn’t noticed the blonde figure slipping back into the living room, believing herself to be sneaky.

That would have worked better if she had managed not to gasp when he dropped his robe, and showed off his frame. He couldn’t blame her much, as he did look amazing.

“Finally, the talk is over,” he said, even as he stepped into the shower, leaving the door cracked open for Serena.

“Who invited you here?” Blair responded, trying to sound coy, but that died the moment he pressed her against the shower wall, and slipped inside her again. Her moan was beautiful.

“I can always stop if that’s your wish, princess,” he teased her, his hips pausing.

“Pull out, and I’ll kill you,” she responded. He chuckled and followed her request.

Ten minutes later, he got another reward, which didn’t surprise him even the slightest bit .

[Achievement complete. Assist Serena in having a naughty climax.

Challenge: Medium]

[+5 Charisma

1 Random Silver Skill

1 Random Silver Reward]

He carried Blair to bed after Serena retreated, as busting her for voyeurism wasn’t as entertaining.

He would have loved to focus on Blair until dawn. Unfortunately, while Blair had many interesting qualities, stamina was not one of them. Their little shower adventure had depleted the last bit of her stamina.

He slid next to her bed, and she clamped down around him.

Unsurprisingly, she was a cuddler. She might act like the cold queen of the Upper East Side, but she was desperate for intimacy. Something that her network was unable to provide in any capacity.

Before falling asleep, he pulled his phone, and did some remote work. The first thing he did was to adjust his publicly available information with a combination of hacking and casual manipulation.

Not to hide, but to do some controlled revealing.

Since he would be seen with Blair, he would start showing up in the newspapers as well. Luckily, reporters, especially the kind that works for gossip rags, were lazy, so feeding them information while letting them think they discovered was easy.

His aim was to have two layers. The first was to be Blair’s new boy toy rather than the mysterious new entrant to the game. That way, he would be reasonably concealed. Then, he created a second layer, to be found if someone dug seriously, finding that he was more complicated than expected.

Of course, serious meant good private investigator serious, not spy serious.

Then, he focused on the real work. He knew that Chuck had just decided to purchase his precious Empire Hotel, meaning the transaction would go through soon.

He probably could have blocked the sale, but that would have taken a few weeks of dedicated effort. Even for him, blocking a sale going around half a billion was a sizable challenge.

Adding some annoyance to the sale process, on the other hand, was much easier, especially since it had yet to be declared officially; his legal knowledge proved useful.

Using a few of his shell companies to sue Bass Industries and the Empire Hotel was easy, especially since he didn’t even need to oversee it.

Frankly, if Chuck had merely tried to buy the bakery on the cheap, that would have been the extent of it. Unfortunately for him, he tried to ruin Max’s life in the process.

He was very protective of her.