TV Multiverse 114 (Patreon)

Carina’s reveal ended the commotion quite a bit. A Deputy Chief of Police trying to frame an undercover DEA agent as a favor was devastating enough, but one of the parties involved was a senatorial candidate, and the other was an ambassador.

Combined, it was a political disaster, the kind that involved the whole political apparatus.

Naturally, he had no intention of getting involved, which was the benefit of having Robert Zane as a lawyer. He was also hoping to avoid the bigger mess with Serena, Jenny, and their parents.

Unfortunately, that would not do.

He was still sitting in a waiting room when the door opened, and Lily van der Woodsen, Serena’s mother, entered. Technically, she shouldn’t be able to enter, but she was a billionaire, which was effectively a superpower.

Behind her, Dan and Jenny’s father Rufus followed, but he was hesitant, letting Lily take the lead.

Ethan decided he didn’t like Rufus much. Rufus had the kind, enlightened aura of a great father, but it was just the surface. He was more interested in playing the cool dad than actually being a good one. He consistently had been a terrible father who never truly helped when his children struggled.

His obvious inferiority complex toward his wife didn’t help his effectiveness either. He was following Lily like a lost puppy.

Jenny and Dan stood at the entrance, and behind them, stood their lawyer, who had been ordered to stay away. He examined the others. Jenny was hesitant and confused, while Dan was angry. Dan’s anger was understandable. Merely a couple weeks ago, he stole Dan’s movie star girlfriend.

Interestingly, Serena was absent.

Lily spoke first. “You!” she declared, delivering condemnation.

He smirked. Lily was clearly used to people falling apart to address her whims; combination of being rich and beautiful affecting the surrounding people. Unfortunately, it didn’t work on him. “Guys, you shouldn’t have gone out of your way to thank me,” he said.

“Thank you. For what? Putting two of my children into jail because you wanted to play undercover cop!” she spat out.

“You’re right. After all, I arranged for Jenny to date a shady, international drug smuggler because I’m a status-obsessed airhead,” he said, then let his eyes widen mockingly. He had no problem using his show knowledge to his benefit, and ultimately, it had been Lily who arranged that date.

That was enough to shatter Lily’s domineering aura. She paused. “Lily?” Rufus asked.

“He was the son of an ambassador, Rufus. How would I know?” Then, she turned to him. “You’re the one that arranged the sting. Don’t change the subject.”

“I was,” he said with a shrug. “I don’t like creepy drug dealers who’s trying to turn underage girls into addicts. Sue me,” he said.

Rufus looked surprised. “Did he?”

“He … he tried to make me ‘test’ the product,” Jenny whispered. “I didn’t know what to do.”

Neither Dan nor Rufus said anything, but their expressions showed that they were ready to blame Jenny for the admission. Which, unfortunately, was not a surprise. They seemed to have a terrible sense for when to be supportive, and when to be strict, consistently choosing the wrong one.

He ignored then, and turned to Jenny. “My recommendation: always carry pepper spray, and maybe take self-defense lessons as well. So, the next time an idiot tries to pressure you, you can just smash his nose.”

“That’s nonsense—“ Lily started to say.

“Because the Upper East Side is very safe, right?” Ethan cut Lily off. “Nothing bad ever happens.”

“It’s not your business to care about how I raise my children.”

“Yes, because you’re the mother of the year,” he responded, not giving her even an inch. He might have been somehow more forgiving if he hadn’t had to travel just to save both her daughter and her stepdaughter from terrible mistakes. “You know I’m only here because Blair asked me to save your other daughter from a serial predator.”

“Tripp might be married, but he’s not a…”

“Really. All it took was a call to dig that dirt,” Ethan said. “Eight interns who got fired with NDA’s. All female, young, and blonde.” He paused, then smirked. “But, I forget. He’s a van der Bilt, so he can’t be a predator. His interns are sluts.”

“I won’t stand here and listen to this nonsense.”

Ethan shrugged. “Go ahead and leave, then.”

“I don’t want you in Manhattan,” she responded, flailing at his lack of interest.

He couldn’t help but laugh at her attitude, amused that she was trying to pull a Blair. “Really? Are you going to exile me, Mrs. Woodsen?”

“Yes,” she declared, trying to sound serious.

He stood up and took a step toward her, radiating confidence. “Sweetie, I’m not one of the spoiled rich kids your children are hanging around. If you push, I will push back. Ask your stepson Bass how things went the last time he tried to pull a dirty trick.”

Lily fell silent, as it was clear that she was used to people folding under her threats. The day he got scared of a bored, aimless MILF was the day he should just leave civilization and start living as a monk, because it would be wasting every single gift he received.

“Hey, get away from—“ Rufus started, trying to shield Lily with his body, forgetting that he was merely a retired rockstar. He turned his gaze to him. He didn’t try to intimidate Lily, because she was still a woman, and he had standards.

Rufus had no such protection. Under his sharp gaze, Rufus blanched and took a step back. A detail that had been seen by both his wife and his daughter. Rufus was already fated to ruin both relationships, but looking at their utter disappointment, he wondered if he hastened both.

“Stay away from my children,” Lily declared, trying to look confident, then grabbed Jenny’s arm, and started walking away.

[Achievement complete. Defeat Lily van der Woodsen in front of her family.

Challenge: Hard]

[+5 to Any Stat

1 Random Gold Skill

1 Random Gold Reward]

He smiled. He wasn’t surprised to see Lily’s best quality was attractiveness. She might be annoying and entitled, but she was still incredibly beautiful and elegant. Franky, she was a grown-up Serena.

While they disappeared, he picked the reward option.

[Inspiration for an abstract painting]

He hummed. It was an interesting reward, potentially very valuable, and potentially completely useless. It depended exactly on how that inspiration would work. It was also a good reminder that Rewards could be very gimmicky. But, before he could consider, Dan returned.

"Why do you hate me?" Dan said. “Is it just because of Blair?”

Ethan shook his head. He could probably say something that would shatter Dan completely, but it would be too mean. Dan was more of a jerk than he realized, but not to a point that deserved to be torn down completely.

At least, not yet. Future Dan was a different issue.

“I don’t hate you,” he said. “Why do you think I do?”

Dan laughed. "You are kidding me, right? You stole my girlfriend, you help Blair in her schemes, and right now, you get my sister arrested.”

“Sisters, if we’re being technical,” he responded, watching Dan shuffle in discomfort. Serena as his new sister, was understandably uncomfortable.

“So you hate me.”

Ethan sighed. He decided to be honest, even though he suspected Dan wouldn’t listen. "I really don't," he said. "I liked Olivia, and so I seduced her. It has very little to do with you,” he said. “And, I actually did you a favor.”

“A favor?“ Dan scoffed.

“Yes, because you’re clearly still in love with Vanessa. Do you really have an idea how badly you would have screwed up if you stayed with Olivia while you’re in love with her roommate?”

“I … I don’t.”

“Look. I’m a good judge of character, and it’s obvious that you two have strong feelings for each other.”

“I’m not in love,” Dan repeated.

He sighed. “Look, I don’t really care. We’re not friends. I don’t even like you. Still, take my advice. Spend more time with your sister. She looks like a nice kid, but this Upper East Side nonsense would shatter her.”

With that, he left Dan standing at the precinct entrance and went to find Amy. Just because he needed to wait for Zane’s confirmation to leave didn’t mean he had to wait around, bored.

He found Amy and Terry around Terry’s desk, working on the paperwork. “Wow, that escalated quickly,” he commented.

“You’re telling me that?” Amy said, sounding dazed. “We just took down the deputy chief of police. He tried to suppress a federal undercover sting illegally. He’ll be gone.”

“You’re welcome,” he said with one of his best smiles, and Amy blushed. Terry gave a knowing smile, but said nothing. He was very respectful when it came to the private lives of his team. “So, any idea who’s next in line?”

“Maybe Captain Holt will be promoted?” Terry suggested.

Ethan shook his head. “Not very likely. From what I see, Captain Holt is too politically isolated.”

“I hate politics,” Amy said, looking exhausted.

“Who doesn’t?” he asked, and they chuckled. “Do you mind joining me for a quick bite while my lawyer handles the boring details?” he asked Amy.

She sighed, disappointed. “I would love to, but I’m still on duty, so technically, I can’t.”

He smiled, and turned to Terry. “Sarge, I’m feeling hungry, but I’m afraid one of the bodyguards attacking me. Is it possible to assign me an escort considering the extraordinary nature of the case?” he said.

Terry smiled conspiratorially. “That’s a sensible precaution, Mr. Calloway,” he said. “Santiago, please escort Mr. Calloway for a late dinner. Keep your eye on him,” he added, winked at Amy, and left.

Amy looked surprised at the sudden change. “What just happened?”

He leaned close enough for his breath to land on her neck. “I have just used your precious department rules and bureaucratic requirements for my nefarious purposes, of course.”

Against anyone else, it would have been a weird sentence. Against Amy, it was very effective dirty talk. “That’s…”

“Procedurally correct rule breaking,” he said while they walked toward the elevator. “Not that you would know much about rule breaking,” he said. It could have landed as an insult, but not with his throaty tone.

Amy reacted even better than he had been hoping. Her gaze suddenly turned competitive. “Fine, I’ll show you rule breaking,” she said as she started walking faster. She chose the stairs, so he followed.

Even when she climbed the stairs rather than going down. His smile grew when he noticed the corridor she stepped in had a broken security camera. Before he could say anything, she grabbed him and suddenly pulled him into a room, with another broken security camera.

It was an interrogation room.

“Who doesn’t know how to break rules now?” she whispered, and kissed him hard. He let her push him against the interrogation table. He noticed Amy reaching for her handcuffs. He could have easily prevented her from locking him to the desk, but he let her.

He didn’t want to ruin her enthusiasm. “Detective, I need my lawyer,” he whispered.

Amy grabbed his hair, her hold tight. “You don’t need one, criminal scum,” she said, her expression surprisingly scary. She roleplayed like she did everything else, with perfect focus and aiming for perfection. “Not before you reveal the location of your base.”

She looked spectacular.

He decided to play the smug criminal rather than a scared one. Knowing Amy, a scared criminal act would bore her. Instead, he brought his other hand to her cheek. “That would be boring, detective,” he whispered. “But, since I’m a bored criminal, I will give you a chance. If you play a little game, I might not bother calling my lawyer.”

“What kind of game, scum?” she said, her grip tight around his hair.

He sat on the chair, his arm stretched to accommodate the cuffs. “Easy, detective. You work hard to impress me, and I give you a clue. You impress me more, and I give you more clues. I hope you’re good with puzzles.”

Her smirk turned legitimately threatening, but it made her even sexier. Amy might look like a fragile nerd, but she took down hardened criminals for a living. Her threatening expression was not hollow. “I’m the best,” she said.

“Then, show me how good you are, detective—“ he said, only for her to push her pants down, unzip him, and take him in with a sharp drop. “In a hurry, detective,” he said, letting his strained voice show just how much he appreciated her tightness.

“We don’t have time to waste. The city is in danger,” she said, and the initial part of it was actually true. She moved recklessly, and the chair creaked under them.

“Alright, detective, you have won your clue,” he said, whispering an actual clue to a complicated puzzle. Amy’s eyes widened as he asked the question.

“That’s barely a clue,” she whispered.

“Then you need to work harder, detective,” he teased her, his hips meeting her speed.

She whimpered, losing her words as he picked up speed. “That’s cheating,” she whispered, her voice needier as she reached down and bit his neck hard.

“And, this is police brutality, Detective,” he responded. She opened her mouth to answer, but when he thrust up, she lost track of her words. Her head tipped back, throat working, her interrogation shattering somewhat.

Not wanting to ruin her very impressive show, he slowed down. “Impressive work, detective. Here’s your second clue,” he said, giving her a slightly more revealing clue than he had expected.

“So, the base in Northern Manhattan,” Amy said, the joy of solving part of the very complicated puzzle enough to give her some extra power. He pushed his hips up, but this time, she rose, slipping out. “Suspects don’t set the pace.”

“I disagree,” he teased, only for her to silence him by pushing her breasts against his face. He was more than happy to tease her nipples.

She moved down again. “Just give me the next clue, you criminal scum,” she said, rolling her hips in a tight circle. “Tell me.”

“Make me.”

She planted her boots on the rungs of the chair and rode him harder, chasing the angle that made her voice break. Every few strokes she remembered the bit and tried to interrogate him again.

Sometimes, he teased her. Other times, he actually gave her clues. Still, it was a proof of Amy’s incredible intelligence that she managed to assemble the clues. “500 West, Hamilton Heights, abandoned department store,” she declared.

“Very good, detective,” he teased. “But, you have made one mistake.”

“What is the mistake—“ she started, and her eyes widened when she felt something cold around her wrists. He raised his hands smugly, putting his newly improved Illusion ability to better use. “Let me go,” she moaned.

He pushed Amy to the interrogation table, her arms behind her back while her naked breasts pressed against the surface. He set a brutal pace, challenging her to keep her moans getting too loud.

“You should have been more careful, Detective. You’re dealing with a dangerous criminal,” he teased, spanking her. Her tightness was magnificent. “Maybe you should quit. I could use a concubine when I’m escaping to Mexico,” he teased, then grabbed her.

She moaned as she put her head against his shoulder, her eyes glassy, but the sight of her body on the one-way glass was incredible. She moaned louder and louder, the competent detective no longer active…

She climaxed twice before they stopped. “Well, that was fast,” he teased her.

She kissed him. “No time for slow, because of you,” she growled against his lips. “Do you have any idea just how much extra work you have created for us?”

He teased. “I thought you loved paperwork.”

“I do, but not when it comes with that much political consequence. We’ll have all the idiots from headquarters asking us for reviews even though they have no idea about the correct rules.”

He kissed her again while pushing her against the wall. “Well, I can always help you relax. Give me a call, and I’m at your service helping you relax … or conspiring to get the idiots who dare to soil your paperwork fired.”

“Don’t tempt me,” she said, but her legs parted. He slipped inside again, this time not holding back even a bit, fucking her hard and fast.

Watching Amy come undone was fun…

[Achievement complete. Help Amy break a rule.

Challenge: Hard]

[+10 Intelligence

1 Gold Skill

1 Gold Reward]

As he walked out of the precinct twenty minutes later, he was whistling, and the achievement made him even happier. He picked the stat reward, as Intelligence was always a valuable reward.

The next step, his home…