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D&D Court: Pet Rocks, Raven Plagues & The Necromancer Dilemma (Patreon)

Published:
2021-09-02 22:41:16
Imported:
2026-06
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AD-FREE EPISODE FOR $5+ PATRONS!

Dungeon Court is back in session! Join Supreme Crit Justices Murphy, Axford, and Tanner, as well the Illustrious Bailiff Hurwitz, as we review your cases. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content!

CREDITS:

Dungeon Court Theme Song by Sam Weiller

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Comments

Summer Tribe

I still think their approach to the animate dead one is cracked. y'all just hate the spell. the player was trying to cast it. they wouldn't have to narrate shit if the DM just streamlined the process or talked to the player at all coherently. that player is 100% in the right then they follow up by standing by matéo (spelling?) for just no reason. both DMs in a row utterly failed to improvise or adapt to just having a spell be cast totally normally. why is the court on their sides?

Sable Szczeklik-Silvius

My Ancient Greek II professor would constantly remind us that she learned Ancient Greek in a 2week/10day intensive. Frustrating to hear when you’re in a semester long class and struggling, but my man. You can learn languages really quick. It’s retaining them that’s the problem.

LS777

I love the demeating character but only if it's in character and not just metagaming and only if all the other players like it

Scruggzi

'Universal healthcare but no separation of church and state' had me do a very British facepalm. Welcome to the UK, where the NHS is mostly still free (but also hands your medical records over to Palantir) and senior members of the Church of England get automatic seats in the House of Lords. I'd like to petition the court to replace my government with a pet rock.

Thomas Friedlander

Absolute perfect timing! I was about to replay and old episode

skat

Bless y’all

Owen Rath

solid work fellas

Dmkampz

Thanks beef cake Murph!

Mick

Impeccable timing! Thanks guys. Hope y'all are safe and well with the crazy weather over there. Good vibes from Australia!

ConflictedDM

Thank Malora and Palor I had nothing else to listen to at work. Saving lives one episode at a time.

Emily Lalande

I don’t know how you guys knew, but I’m about to get on a long flight and have a lot of flight anxiety! Can’t wait to listen to your dulcet tones and let them distract me!

Tyler Weikel

On the cleric pathfinder question just wanted to point out money is much more important in pathfinder than in 5e so the premise of the question is valid

Bulbarat

The one with the cleric, spell components with high gold values aren't usually consumed unless specified, so these should be one time purchases unless the spouse specifies otherwise. So everyone was wrong

GREYFOX!!!!!

Thank God I'm working an overnight so this will keep me sane

heavy harry

Mckayla absolutely rules

Tattoo'd P-psychologist

Wait...DnD court?! You're leaving us hanging on Fia's BA escape!??! Uhg. I hate it when Murpg amps up my excitement with prolonged suspense.

Mentalpop

the cleric case is just the american healthcare debate lolol

Kai

I feel like a good solve for the government issue pet rock was exactly what Caldwell said, secret egg and when it hatches...a pet ROC

Michael Singer

5e has rules on learning a language, it takes 10 weeks and 250 gold to learn a new language with xanathars guide

Armadon the only

With the case of cleric costs, for story reasons the cleric can res someone only if their god excepts it. For mechanic purposes the player should pay the full costs and since the cleric isn’t charging for the service, and only the components his alignment shouldn’t need to change.

Matt A

The creator of the court stats PowerPoint is my new hero

Bandanno

I love that Jake began his judging career so seriously with reciting the oath & then immediately began abstaining/shirking his duties 😂 Thanks for another fantastic round of court!

Alessandra

I think we need Brennan as a guest judge, yknow for fun

Hamish

Heyy guys come on now, please play the whole intro song! Makes me laugh every, single, time. Absolute gold.

Maxwell Haranda

All hail the new deity of Bahumia! The Salt Elemental, Brian Murphy!

Geraint

Can you pleeeeaaaase play the whole theme song every time? It's so so good!!!

Wretched Pie

I love D&D Court. You folks are just wonderful. ❤️

Noah James Perito

Cleric question - EVERYONE pays the bill! Universal resurrection healthcare

hell

i am so fucking glad the de-meat-ing question made it in i laughed so hard reading that

Josh Owl

The stats were GOLD!! I loved those!

Dave 3D Art

I'll knock it off with the MTG life counters, and the mediocre dice rentals. In my defense, the life counters are pretty, and I have an abundance of them. Makes rolling for large groups of enemies easier. As for loaning out mediocre dice to players, it was only ever the habitually forgetful ones. In any case, I with bathe in the forgiving light of Dice Christ.

ChromaticMars

Technically for fully learning a new language it’s 8 weeks in game time, but its -1 week if >more than 1 other person in the group speaks the language -1 week if any of the above people speak it natively (a dwarf teaching dwarven) -0.5 weeks for every point of intelligence bonus on the student These all stack, so say if the person had a 4 INT and learned from a gold dragon it would be 5 weeks to fully learn the language so I think 1 week of crunching the language the student would definitely have learned key words and some phrases

Professor Pratt

I am literally crying laughing in my car in a Walmart parking lot getting ready to go to work. Caldwell saying “I love to be a scamp. But I really love it when Daddy Murph punishes me for being a scamp!!” Bravo sir! Bravo!

Katina

Can you guys please do a liveshow halftime d&d court session? Imagine picking a case beforehand, and having the plantiffs and defendants give their case on the stands 😭I love it.

Akshata

i think skinner did a study where he would give pigeons food rewards either randomly or at like a fixed interval length, but it was not related to their behavior at all like normal conditioning is. so the pigeons just developed their own weird rituals, like one would spin counterclockwise a lot because it thought that was what caused the reward. people say you can use this to study human superstition. anyways love the new dice christ confessions segment.

Holly Garrick

I study languages and I absolutely looooved the language question about learning draconic because it made me think about which languages would make learning other languages easier in dnd - Like does elvish have similar roots to draconic, and therefore could an elf learn it faster than a halfling? so interesting, I love it!!

Sahara

I know nobody asked for an update on the ravens story but I feel like this will give some context. After a medicine check, I told the party that they have 2 options, see a doctor (there was one in town) or find a cleric (they'd have to go to the nearest city but I know they like to do things the hard way). They chose to find and kill a unicorn to drink its blood because an evil mage in a previous town had been planning to do that to cure his blindness. By the time they found their unicorn, they'd all succeeded on enough saves to have beaten the illness so they recruited the unicorn to fight alongside them and I let it happen because I am a weak person and I liked doing the unicorn's funny voice.

Queue

I have to vehemently disagree with the ruling in the de-meating case. In my opinion the DM is at fault here. The necromancer is just trying to take advantage of what his class has to offer. If I were in the DM's position, the first time the "de-meating" thing happened I would simply say "Okay, gross, stop. You can hold 'x' number of humanoid corpses in the bag regardless of meat quantity." If the player argued with this, THEN, I would steal the bag of holding and perhaps present him with other options for corpse holding, whether homebrewed or otherwise. If you're the DM and you're too afraid to sway from RAW then you need to be able to deal with the roleplay that comes out of that, especially since you knew he was a necromancer when you let him in the campaign. Don't ruin a player's fun just because you don't know how to set rules with your player: "Don't do the de-meating thing. It's gross and we don't want to hear it."

A. Godfrey

I think the party should pool resources for the cleric spells. The cleric in question said that this option would penalize party members that don't need healing as often, but one of the reasons they don't get hurt as often is probably because the tank is up there soaking up the damage, or because the fighter is getting up in the mix drawing the enemy's attention. Good heals benefit the whole party, not just the player receiving the heal.

Evan Cordero

I feel saved after hearing Father Murphy's teachings. I feel touched by Dice Christ in this moment. Thank you for your wise teachings Father Murph

Nick Bidaurreta

a tear of pride came to my eye when Jake took the oath...

Corey

God i love D&D Court

Stephanie Beal

I want to hear more about Cadwell's heretical Dice Christ theology.

Julie V Eckert

My group splits all our loot after each adventure so we can save for our own cool things (like magic tattoos) if we want. But our 2 main supports (myself being one) are often the ones to buy stuff that helps everyone haha. I think for something like a diamond we would all chip in. I love this podcast! Makayla's(sp?) stats were so fun!!

ChimiChangle

At 20:00 they're literally complaining about paying for life insurance lmao

Cliff

Good stuff, but am I the only one who dislikes that the intro was truncated?

James

All hail Michela the Crit Reporter

Eric and Andrea Benoit

I think could be fun for future dnd courts to Lou be a lawyer for the players and murph be lawyer for Dms and the rest be the justices. Who decide based on their arguments

Gabriel Graywood

Is it just me or did we hear the de-meat story before? Maybe it was another podcast? I'm tripping out here.

Carey Compton

I have to be on the players' side for the first one... I have two pigeons and two cockatiels, and my house is literally covered in poop at all times. What I wouldn't give for a "banish poop" spell!

Mak

Omg the cleric question - when I play I establish right away a Team Fund. If my party is 6 people, I divide all loot into 7 and put that seventh into the group fund. This pays for everything from tavern rooms to covering some personal costs - including items that are for the whole group, like diamonds. Because I’m the responsible person, I’m essentially the bank, and I always tell everyone when I dip from there. It works flawlessly because I’m not forcing people to give me money - I’ve established this fund for our group and it’s for things that an individual wouldn’t cover. In the same vein, it also holds each person responsible for personal purchases like armor and other spell components.

Omar Mtz

Wow it turn religious at the end way fast🤣

Chris Truex

I think there's a big disconnect, vis a vis money, with 5e vs Pathfinder. Pathfinder, for better or worse, is highly gear-based, and you do absolutely need to save up for important items, critical weapon improvements, etc. While we always will throw in a few hundred or a thousand if someone needs it for something, it's still your cash pool to spend on improvements. It's not like 5e, where you might have a magic item or two. That said, my Pathfinder groups always create a party fund, and split all loot counting the fund as an extra person. The cost of healing spells, if needed, comes out of that. And if someone is a bit short on a big purchase, they just check with the party and take it from there.

kara mac

That corpse stripper sounds like those brothers that stole bodies for Edinburgh Medical School and to get fresher corpses they started killing people