Becca Hillburn

Slow Learner (Patreon)

Published:

2024-06-27 16:00:14

Imported:

2026-10

Tags:

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Content

This week, I made the mistake of recording in different color space han I normally work in. This is supposed to be a better color space and was a beta option to try out, but ended up completely breaking my workflow! Rather than edit my usual way, we had to take the whole process into Premiere and do a decent amount of color fixing and tinkering. The upside, I suppose, is that now I'm that much more familiar with Premiere. The downside is that it took FOREVER just to edit a single timelapse video. No Rec2100QC for me. I have several videos recorded in this format, but I've found a way to handle it that isn't so desktop-intensive.

Sometimes I feel like the more I learn, the more it bogs down what I'm doing and makes me less interested. This is the case with learning Premiere. I understand it's necessary if I want to grow (or even continue what I'm doing at this point), but being chained to my desktop computer in my studio takes a lot of the ease and fun out of messing around with video.

In case you didn't know, I'm going to share a dirty little secret- I record AND edit on my phone. I used to do ALL of my editing on my phone, using VN Editor, but due to some fairly recent bugs that affect how I add in music, I'm now doing some of my editing in VN and some of my editing in Premiere. It's not an elegant solution and slows me down considerably- I would often edit in the evenings while doing free roam with Basil or even from the bathtub and screen videos while doing household chores. Now, I have to dedicate more Sit Down and Do time to editing, which can sometimes be challenging.

A couple weeks ago, Joseph and I took a swing dance class. It was supposed to be lowkey and easygoing, and I've taken swing before and did swing dance in high school as part of Ensemble (think Glee but way dorkier), and sometimes while at rockabilly concerts. Unfortunately, Sjogren's has taken away most of the limited grace and limberness I used to have, and I've forgotten pretty much all the steps I used to know.

The real issue is I'm an extremely slow learner- it generally takes me at least twice as long to pick something up as those around me, and I'd forgotten how much time I'd dedicate after school to teaching myself math or doing drawing drills. I'd gotten kinda good at hiding the fact that I'm slower to pick things up than others, and in some ways, have structured my life to support the additional time I need to pick up new skills. If I'm taking an art class in a new medium, I'll research the heck out of it first and watch a lot of Youtube videos of people practicing the craft (that's if I'm brave enough to take an in-person class- there's a reason I'm a fan of kits), and I try to just let go and have fun.

It was a little embarrassing to keep messing up the same steps over and over again in front of people who picked them up effortlessly. I've gotten good at cracking a smile and making a joke to hide my discomfort, and I honestly didn't really mind that I was fumbling the steps. What bothered me more was a reminder that I often struggle to learn new things and need extra time, and most of my day-to-day life offers little time to take things slow.

If you're a slow learner like I am, I commiserate. It makes trying new things more daunting, as it means a significant time investment to even decide if you enjoy it. Whether its art or dancing, learning new things takes courage. I am so impressed by anyone who decides to start learning art as an adult- it was so much easier to pick up new hobbies and interests when I was younger and had more energy.