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Hey friends, it's Jon again. Alex and I have a brand-new episode of "Scorigami" just for you, completely ad-free and months before it hits YouTube. In the first episode (which is here if you'd like to catch up), we quickly found that scorigami is more than a trivial numbers game. It's a keyhole through which some of the weirdest, funniest stories throughout NFL history can be found, some of which we've been sitting on for many years. In particular, the Rams-Giants game you're about to see is one I've been waiting for an excuse to talk about for at least five years. It's perhaps the dumbest NFL game ever played, which means it is also one of my favorite NFL games ever played.

Thanks as always to each and every one of you who have decided that early access to projects like these is worth your hard-earned dough. If you're a new Patreon member, we've got tons more exclusive stuff waiting for you, including my four-part series "Fool Time" that still hasn't been released to the general public. Enjoy! We'll be back with with Part 3 of Scorigami on August 4th.

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Comments

Jake R

We. Are. So. BACK!

Boreal Tempest

Perfect timing: I just got out of a meeting and it looks like I'll be taking 48 minutes for lunch.

CJ

I won't be able to watch until after work, but I have to ask before I watch, is the Rams/Giants game the one where the Giants recovered their own opening kickoff for a touchdown because of a special teams miscue, but then the Rams scored a punt return TD and *three* safeties? It's not Scorigami but it is a funny game

Isaac Howard

scoirgami part 2 rahhhh!!! 🔥🔥🔥

Alchemist Jijo

I was about to point out an editing error in the 19th minute of this program but decided to sit it out, confused- glad I did

Sebastien Rempel

It’s my birthday today, so this episode better be super duper extra good

Mouse Madness

Lamar Hunt (no relation to me): "Yeah, well Im going to start my own league. With blackjack and hookers!"

M. C. T.

Waiting five weeks for part 2 of this series has felt like five months!

Ryan Petriello

Holy shit that Rams-Giants game really didn't disappoint

NowIOnlyWantATriumph

45:39 The Rangers beat the *Orioles* 30–3, not the Orioles

Robert

How is this your first reference to the Heidi game lol

John Dees

Rangers beat the orioles 30-3, not the Astros

Robert

Yes!

Andrew North

Had no idea Heidi Game was a scorigami. Way to capture the frustration of watching it live.

Trenchgun

holy hell we're so back

nywatt

Hell yeah, love to see the return of Classical Odyssey.

DisAstro

"Sometimes three little dots can say more than a thousand words ever could."

Matt

The return of l'espace temps!

James baird

Got it, so for my idea of a five point trick shot field goal to be added just to cause chaos I’ve got to start my evil oil empire and manipulate my eventual son into founding a rival league, thanks for the advice Jon

An Enemy Spy

The Broncos getting pasted in the Super Bowl for a Scoragami? Man, it would be wild if that ever happens again.

Alex Mattson

omg skyline is back and well used

CJ

That's basically the Dorktown motto

Sasha Lišková

Jon, I hold your writing in the highest of esteem, but as the math dork I am, I must inform you that the proper word for the distribution at 38:10, if one wants to avoid the confusing "normal" and the associations with Charles Murray conveyed by "bell-curve", is "Gaussian." It's definitely not parabolic. Loved everything else!

Dr. Katz

Jon will make a long winded segment about the beauty of life and all it has to offer only to return to a football game from 1975

Charlie Fellows

30-3 was Rangers/Orioles not Astros unfortunately

Trey

lol I actually got chills when he did the Heidi cut because it confused me for a second. I remember playing NFL 2K5 as a kid, and reading about that being a classic moment you could play and wondering how that could happen and what that would be like, and he absolutely pulled the rug on me. I knew this game existed, I knew the twist, but the reveal that this was the Namath team en route to SB III totally distracted me.

Batti1358

Jon, love your stuff but by God could you have someone just sit down and listen to your videos before you post them? Half the time you're fighting against the background music in the mix!

Blue Weber

I went back and replayed that cut a few times when it happened because I was so confused. I am with you though, got chills when he explained that process.'

Sam

As a diehard O’s fan, it’s should be noted that the Rangers beat the Orioles 30-3, not the Astros. Put some disrespect on our name please

Kylie McInnes

The odds of that happening are like, 43:8 or something.

Abigail Rytel

What I'm gathering from all this is that Jon should form a new football league where you get one point if you just throw the ball through the uprights, the capitol he'll need for such an endeavor he'll acquire from selling off his vast empire of mattresses.

Robert

Also that game wasn't even Scorigami! It was the second ever 30-3 major league game!

Datsko

Seeing the bit about the two eternal scorigami happening in clobberings of the Broncos in the Super Bowl is fascinating, especially knowing there will be another

Nicholas Poer

If I had nickel for every time that happened...

Saul Allan Weinberger

I remember watching AJ Brown's kick/punt return mix-up in my VHS copy of The NFL's 100 Greatest Follies. Had no idea how incredibly WACKY that game was. Actually, that gives me an idea for a video. Saddest Punt, but goofiest folly instead. You could add some variables into the equation like when the play took place during the game, if it resulted in a score, how long the play took, etc.

JohnnyTikitavi

I cannot believe that the Heidi game was eternal scorigami! Crazy

Jamie B.S.

i have not laughed out loud at a static image as hard as i did at the goalpost taking a nap in a long time. incredible. it looks like a goddamn cartoon.

Rebmon

When the Raiders-Jets game was mentioned. I knew the Heidi cut would happen. I didn't realize it was also a scorigami game.

Riley McPherson

came here to see if anyone else had pointed this out as I was going to if it hadn't. I'm a Tigers fan but the night of that game, I was at Comerica Park and when the final score popped up on the out of town scoreboard, me and my brothers thought it was broken and the moment we got to our hotel room, we turned on ESPN to watch the highlights of the insanity

David James

I know you're talking about American sports rather than sports as a whole, but it's wrong to say that American football is the only Scorigamic sport. Because rugby exists, and it has weird combinations of numbers that can create odd scores in the same kinda way. Actually rugby is TWO entirely separate sports (much like how there's American Football and Canadian Football), one called Rugby Union and the other called Rugby League and they have differences in how the scoring works, most notably Rugby League offers a way to score individual points, whereas Rugby Union does not. So yeah in Rugby Union there's a few ways to score, a Try (equivalent of a touchdown except you actually have to touch the ball down on the ground) = 5 points. Conversion Kick (like the extra point after a touchdown, you only score these after scoring a try first) = 2 points. Penalty Kick = 3 points. And a Drop Goal (dropping it out of your hands and kicking it up and through the posts with your foot, like as if it was possible that you could use a punter to score in American football) = 3 points. So yeah, Scorigami exists in Rugby Union too. It kinda exists in Rugby League too but less so because again there's a way to score single points in Rugby League (a drop goal is worth only 1 point instead of 3). So yeah it'd be interesting to go through the history of rugby union, and try to work out if there are any possible scores that haven't yet been achieved. But since it's a far more popular sport than American football, globally, there's been many more games with which any scores can have been scored, so maybe there's very few possible Scorigami left in it by this point.

CJ

That's similar to the single/rouge in the CFL

Fox Doucette

Rugby is also helped by one of my favorite rules, which is that the conversion kick is taken from the same spot, just moved back, as where the ball was touched down for a try. The upshot is that there are a lot of orphaned fives to go with the sevens in calculating potential Scorigami. There's also the fact that there are some downright comical mismatches in international competition, like when the All Blacks play against some little coral atoll that's about 10 years from being swamped by global climate change but still manages to field a rugby side. Lots of upside potential at the far right of the X-axis. I'd love to see that in American football, incidentally. Score a touchdown right on the sideline? You get to kick the PAT from the sideline 15 yards back. Good luck getting that through the uprights.

Fox Doucette

My favorite part of that whole box score is the fact that a save was recorded. A reliever who enters a game regardless of the score and finishes at least the final three innings without being the pitcher of record (as Wes Littleton was that day, entering for the bottom of the 7th of a game that was already 14-3 in the Rangers' favor) gets a save.

Fox Doucette

Congratulations H.L. Hunt, you just invented the Roman Republic, where citizens were functionally on a tierlist that was by statute set by their wealth and allowed to vote with power proportional to the tier they occupied.

Efren Echavarria

That cut to Heidi has been one of the most hilarious and confounding things I've ever seen. This is why I love secret base.

Jon Martin

Best jump cut in the entire JBCU. I knew it was coming and still almost pissed myself.

Jason Free

You guys are asking for the Giants to get walloped this year and add to their total!

Mitch Raeck

"If you get too weird, it'll horseshoe back around to the realm of the ordinary" is the jon bois twitter/bluesky experience

Ben

You’ve elevated Scorigami. The comparison between basketball, baseball, and football scoring distributions was fantastic.

David L.

My friend was at that game rooting for the O's. He said it was tragic but eventually looped back to hilarious

Ben

In part 2 I think Jon makes the case that Football Scorigami is interesting because it says that something weird happened. A one point score is not a weird thing. So football Scorigamis would become as normalized as baseball scorigamis.

Benjamin Czarnik

As you talked about the Jets Raiders game, I just kept saying "Wait for it." Classic.

Fox Doucette

So give a team four points, but the throw has to be launched from behind the 50-yard line (where the line of scrimmage is doesn't matter. If you snap it on the 20, run back 30 yards without being sacked along the way, and then huck it through the uprights, boom, four points.) So one, more Scorigami because a four would play merry havoc with the scoring permutations. Two, a Hail Mary when down by just a field goal would be a blast for fans. And three, the entire four column and row of the Scorigami board, presently walled off by the need to score two safeties and ONLY two safeties, is now on the table for a final.

ben_

Still a believer that Browns/Chiefs '02 is the most Scorigami Game ever but these definitely compete

Harrison Hodges

Although you can score 1 point in Rugby League, it's about as rare as the safety in American Football and only tried in certain circumstances, making odd numbers pretty uncommon.

walterxbenjamin

While on sheer player participation numbers Rugby Union would have American Football completely wiped, football does have a pretty high reach world wide as a spectator sport - Rugby (Union) might still be more popular, but certainly not FAR more.

Nate Wild

"Narrator is 42 years old" does not have the right to be that funny

Jason Free

Real question is how does the CFL scorigami compare to the NFL?

KeegoTheWise

7:50 i mentioned this last month, but the cowboys causing a two-year old nfl team to move to kansas city is quite poetic since kc’s previous nfl team, the blues (seen briefly in part 1) changed their name to the cowboys in their second and final season before being shipped off and sold for scrap

KeegoTheWise

39:00 ok, so the closest thing i can think of to scoregami in the nhl would be when the red wings (around 2022 i think? time is weird from that era) managed to lose games by a margin of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, and 10 in a single season

Robert

Which Rugby Which League

Kevin Moynihan

46:00 Was the display of 43-8 here an intentional Easter egg calling out Super Bowl 48.

Kevin Moynihan

I feel like the fact there’s absolutely no way to score less than 3 points at a time however makes for a far less interesting scorigami landscape. Scorigami is made possible not just by the odd multiples you can score in but by the fact that American football also has one exceedingly rare where to score in the safety worth just 2 points that can push things off normal. Missed PATs and two point conversions definitely help a good amount as well. With 3,5, and 7 being the only tools I think that by now the only scorigami left would be towards the higher end of the spectrum.

Kevin Moynihan

I was looking to see if anyone else noticed the 43-8 there.

moshcreep

good nice great cool

David McClelland

There's a CFL scoregami chart here: https://cflscorigami.ca/ The middle is filled in a lot more, thanks to the ease of scoring a single point, and the fringes have some good stuff, like the 55-55 tie between Montreal and Edmonton, Edmonton's 87-45 win over Ottawa way out on the right side of the chart, and Montreal handing Ottawa a 1-0 loss in a 1966 game where everyone apparently decided to play association football instead.

Jason Free

60-1 is my favorite.. What I was trying to imply is we need Jon to talk about these and the other oddities

Edward Tischler

I can't wait for the homage to Pete Carroll that will surely come at some point in this series

Edward Finer

Missed several opportunities for a Queens of the Stone Age reference near the end of this one, boys, but excellent work nonetheless

Sam Aronow

I think I figured out the silver thing. In Hebrew, the word for money is “kesef,” which literally just means silver. French also does this, though Greek doesn’t. At least modern Greek doesn’t. Any Koine Greek speakers who support Secret Base (I’m sure you exist) can feel free to jump in with the relevant knowledge.

Hurt Reynolds

I love the work and detail that Alex contributes! I have one minor nit to pick: I wish he'd dial down the Sports AnnOUNcer AFFext about 30%. That aside, it works as a great play-by-play to Jon's color commentary, and I'm glad for the specifics to flesh out the overall mood!

Antonio Barry

Everybody say thank you Tom Kennedy

Jimmy Keffer

At 43:25 the 21-8 game is not lit up. Literally unwatchable 😭 (Goated video as always, I wish it would never end)

Guy Atkins

But if you get too weird...Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on one's perspective) I took a sip of water at this moment and literally did a spit take.

Michael Putlack

Joined just so i can watch this video immediately after part 1 instead of waiting.

theMasochistGamer

Well, it happened again. Seattle recovered their own kickoff in the endzone for a touchdown against Pittsburgh (week 2 of the 2025 NFL season). Part of me wants to see a compilation of all NFL kickoff recovery touchdowns that we have on video, because even more than the safety, any one of THOSE touchdowns is guaranteed to be the result of a figurative trainwreck