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Chapter 14: HOLIDAY HOURS by Jacob Brown

First, Merry Christmas from all of us here at Crossroads. If you missed Hannah’s party story from last night… Yeah, you should go back and read that.

If I’d written this update twenty-four hours ago, I would have said not much has changed since I got myself on The Pay It Forward Society team. I work at the Apple Store. Open 10am-6pm today. All hands on deck!

I live in one of the micro-apartments—same as Kent, Merritt, Noah, and, lately, Devon.

If I had to say which guy I’m closest to, I’d probably say Noah. Kent’s a bit older, and Merritt is pretty locked in with work and he spends a lot of time with Emma.

Speaking of my high school friend, Emma’s no less amazing than I figured she would be when I copied her notes on lab reports when we were in AP Chemistry.

Okay, last night… Mistletoe incident…

Addison and I have been hanging out a lot. I really like her, and we get along great. But, I stayed in a holding pattern.

Growing up where I did, you learn early to think before you act, even if it’s following your feelings. In Vicksburg, a Black man just looking at the wrong person at the wrong moment could turn into a problem fast.

So I learned to—as they say—stay in my lane and stay harmless. Old habits don’t disappear just because the setting changes. I wasn’t scared of how Addison would react. I was just keeping in mind that I don’t know where all the lines are up here—and thinking about how others might react.

I don’t know if I would have kissed her if Eric hadn’t been here. I don’t think anyone living here would have reacted badly.

But Emma, Merritt, and Noah had to come up in that same stifling air of lingering southern racism. If you're a Black person, you probably know what I mean.

I know what Emma saw back then. When I kissed a White woman, she had to see images of the boys with pickups and Confederate flags in the back window. I know I had to choke that image out before I kissed her.

No regrets. Just an inkling of concern over things I don’t yet know about.

Be your best you!

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Common Hamster

Chapter 14: HOLIDAY HOURS by Jacob Brown. Jacob, I can't speak to that experience. Where I am, black guys kiss white women. Some drive pickup trucks. I rarely see Confederate flags any more. I would think that in Brooklyn, minds would be more open. I know there are some Southern roots up there with you, but the people seem to be past all that. Especially since you wore matching sweaters? Merry Christmas, sir.