River City Connections — 2025-12-28 (Patreon)

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River City Connections — 2025-12-28

Today is the last Sunday of 2025. A lot of people are looking ahead. Me? As Michael and I head into church, I’m looking back.

In January of 2025, a link in an email took me to X where my old, old, account—high school and freshman year—popped up. Who was that girl! How could she be so open? But as I think about those years, I was even then beginning to pull inward.

Yet seeing that planted a seed, and on February 1, I plunged back into social media, unsure what to do or how to do it. Since then, I’ve made over 360 posts, shared my thoughts on sustainable living and faith, told you about my anxiety disorder, and shared episodes which left me hobbling.

But I did keep moving, and so many of you started encouraging me. Together, we pressed on.

Not all of the moments I shared were of me being strong. I shared a few of my breakdowns. And I didn’t share a lot more.

Out of the blue, a guy I’d swapped a few DMs with on Twitter back so long ago and I started DMing on Instagram. Then commenting on posts. Then texting.

We felt a growing bond and we went with it. We followed it to Azoroth, into World of Warcraft. Discord voice chatting was replaced by FaceTime when we played. And that grew into spending waking days with FaceTime running as we shared our lives across the internet.

We planned for him to come see me at Thanksgiving. And for me to go see him after Christmas. But that Thanksgiving visit made it clear: I did not want to be apart from him.

Now, I’m living in a hotel in Memphis, looking for a house to buy in the metro area, and now—sometimes quietly, sometimes obviously—I’m thinking about a future with him.

My panic attacks have changed from routine events I just accepted to surprises that I fight with—and sometimes overcome. I’m not cured. Just improved.

God said to God’s followers: "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand" (Isaiah 41:10).

The Storylines are the heart of Ailana Geven Imagines, and they are found in the Collections section of the site.

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All characters in this story are fictional characters, their images generated with AI for AGI Stories. They do not represent any real person, nor is their appearance based on any real human.

BACK TO IT by Roman Lenox

I’m on my way from Lexington back to Memphis. Time to get back at it…

And if you’ve followed my posts, there are a few “its” in play.

I’m smiling. I think I’m trying to convince myself I can keep the “its” all together.

One thing I have to get back to is work. The holidays falling in the middle of two consecutive weeks is a pretty big disruption. Even though most everyone in the world celebrates January 1, by the end of the day in Memphis it will already be January 2 for some of my clients. I’ll be working late on Wednesday and getting back at it early on Friday.

During 2025, I’ve pushed out a lot of automation packages that can be customized on a client-by-client basis. Year-end and new-year startup season puts a lot of strain on those custom builds.

There’s a lot happening right now. Counters reset, billing scripts trip over old dates, and a few clients always manage to discover bugs no one else hit.

I’ll be busy, and the other coders at LDM will be, too. (They drew names to see who gets to work remotely on Friday.)

Working late or not, I’ve been conscripted to attend a New Year’s Eve party at Hayes’s apartment. Jordan Warner is relentless and very convincing. She’s invited all the ClearStream people, plus me, and promises it will be relaxed with good snacks.

To be honest, I’m looking forward to hanging out with Michael Allen and meeting the new guy, Carter. Maybe some male friends will do me good…

Clearly, the other “it” I need to get back to is Hayes. I really haven’t hit on a viable option for following my feelings and staying in the right place regarding workplace relationships. I told her not to worry—or something like that—but for now, it’s sort of an empty promise. I don’t have a good plan.

I’m not ready to say what my bad plan is, but I’m sort of heading that way. I just don’t think I can ignore how I feel.

More on that, but not now.

Be your best you!

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