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CLUB VAN - AUGUST 22, 2026 (Patreon)

Published:
2026-08-22 18:10:59
Imported:
2026-09

Downloads

  • ELLEN 8.21.26.mp3

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Content

TRACE YOUR BOWLS! We're talkin' Ru's new 'dos, Troye's foray into poetré, Fluoride, The Merovingian, Theda's new speech therapy business, gay trans love, and PROGESTERONE HONEY!!!!

Files

Comments

Alex S

Get your RUCOCKS OUT

Derek

Macy, its good to see you (in London)

Luke

“EWWW, FINGER!!”

vic

It feels scandalous, taboo even to get my cock out this early

Go-Go “Juice”

Get your Outer Bios out, it’s time to stroke the AI skin graft!!!!

river

Caught In A Jam needle drop had my cock ‘caught in my hand’, if you know what I mean

roboboy

Bitch I’m a freak

Drew

I got cyclospora from the produce at Love Grocery :(

Josh H.

I'm getting in the unmarked Club Van, there better be free gay trans love in there.

Jo

We are go for sex people

Isak

Hope is a muscle that allows us to fart

Henry

A van you can Stan! Werk

Jo

🪱

Quinn

Sexy sexy drag queen 🎶

Isaac

Keeping my cock in so Michael Polansky doesn’t scan it with AI

Zach Defense

Every time Macy says oh yyyeeeaaaahhh in an Australian accent a palm is balmed

Christian Farley

Get your Michael Polansky is training an Al model on skin that's still alive out

Sia Furler

Hearing Troye Sivan’s name pissed me because I had a celeb ghost me after asking me on a date like 2 weeks before he even got to the country bc he was bragging about being friends with Charli XCX and Troye and I was like I don’t respect these people this doesn’t impress me

charlie

Holy cow talk about news you can use!!!! Its patreon please we won't tell🤞

freezy515

The dentists can scoop your bowl

Go-Go “Juice”

Imagine writing a tribute song about how much you love and respect someone and all you can come up with is “shes the best”

kasha davis

oh DADDY! is back on the soundboard 🤗

Emily

Cluuuuuubbb!!! 🩷

Davey

Club is a drug that allows us to faht

Alberto

You all outdid yourselves with this one 🫦

Josh H.

My Fair Hunty, where the cum-stain in Spain falls mainly on the dame!

Go-Go “Juice”

“Theda Hammel (age withheld)” Ohhhh Helloooooooooooo

Nicco

Charlene was transcendental in Nightgowns at Prospect Park last night and she made Sasha introduce her as a “spiritual leader”

Equus Quagga

Theda & Macy it’s good to see you, but what was the source of the 10 loads in the ramble audio from last week?

Davey

I’m gay I had a prophetic dream And I’m gay

Pete Sweenis

When the ep started with portraits of Tracy I thought i was hallucinating….,TRACY NATION

rmtn

are you ok?

Go-Go “Juice”

Troye sivan and charli xcx both listen to Nymphowars apparently

Benji

“A Girlfriend Sandwich on Gay Bread”….🤣🤣🤣🤣 ☮️❤️

rmtn

couldn’t care less about the faggot. are you ok?

Javi

Ready for love!!

reagan

When is Sia Furler biopic happening

Glen

I guess trans masc privilege is real because no one would ever write a dumb fucking borderline offensive pandering song like this about how we like frogs and have jizz dripping out of all holes or whatever

Sia Furler

I would actually love to know what your fave Gaga song is from each album after the Just Another Day debacle… For me, I think: The Fame: Brown Eyes The Fame Monster: So Happy I Could Die Born This Way: Government Hooker ARTPOP: Sexxx Dreams Joanne: John Wayne Chromatica: 911 Mayhem: Zombieboy

Sia Furler

If I’m not cast as Sia I’m going to put a curse on production

Sia Furler

Gay guy with trans woman girlfriend I have seen this play out 3 times before and it always becomes gay guy + t girl toxic cohabitation with no survivors. Do not let inertia prevent you from addressing the fact that you’re gay and you have a girlfriend lest you both end up resentful and 15 years down the line wondering what happened… forgive me if this take sounds cruel but as soon as you have to open up a relationship because you no longer want your partner you need to try and see the trees not the leaves…

EJ

I am a honey baked van

Theo

Anyone remember Philly Folsom

reagan

Theda Hammel (38, visual learner)

Henry

Macy’s “I dreamed a dream”! Is my prophetic dream ❤️❤️❤️

Ryan Koski

I often find myself singing the great Hammelian line from many episodes ago “I feel the rush, addicted to egg salad”

D

me, on progesterone for years, horribly depressed, talking to my doctor: “so do you listen to nymphowars podcast with macy and theda”

BigGayJack

Are you autistic? Because I don’t know if she can get away with that twice…

BigGayJack

Does a human toilet get shat on (in?) in the woods?

Beth Jerky

it's so good it's so good!

Beth Jerky

slap SLAP your bumper! slap SLAP your bumper!

Jae

Jeffree's favourite yak was struck by lightning and Lady Gaga is testing skincare on live human skin with the power of AI - its never been better

courtney

🎶ruuuus you can doooos, babay🎶

EJ

Glad I’m not the only one

Henry

The cheeky kath and Kim drop ticked me fancy 🇦🇺🦘

Dibi

All Stars Anchorage: Dentists v Hunters

Manuel Antón

uh the caller sounds like they're in a very tumblr term which is called a QUEER-PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP!! WOOO POLY PEOPLE WORDS

Manuel Antón

public affair is an incredible song btw, it feels like almost a perfect pop song? idk i love it so much

Pam

Those troye lyrics are dog shit.

Zach Defense

genuinely trans masc invisibility is a gift and anyone who doesn't think so is out of their fucking minds!!!!

BigGayJack

“Now would you call that cock grape or aubergine?” -Olympia Decockass, Steely Mags

Yummy

it was noice, different, unyewsual…

Jo

I was thinking about the Merovingian last week too - specifically where he says ‘Speaking French is like wiping your arse with silk’ - what is happening

Adobo chart updates

Meet @outerbio and YUNA. We are building the future of skin health. outerbio.com Welcome from Michael, Me and the entire team at Outer Bio.

Jakab Bailey

Does Becky have two toilets?

Jakab Bailey

So Happy I Could Die is one of her best songs everrrrr

Jakab Bailey

🎶 Crash and burn, girl, baby, swallow it dry🎶

Thomas

Ru Pual 💜

Zain

Salma Hayek is married to the owner of Kering, the main competitor of LVMH...he's a Russian billionaire

Ross Leonardy

Fad will do anything but be good at her job

Grant W

Get your girlfriends out, it's time to be a gay guy

nitrogen

that RedOne drop was sheer genius

INO

Remember when the Merovingian makes a cake that makes a woman cum??! Why didn’t the incels get obsessed with THAT?

caitlin gender

The club…is a place..that allows us..to fart..

DewLeepa

Tati Westbrook refusing to change in the back rooms would be something I’d love to watch

DewLeepa

Scoop, it’s bowl to see you

DewLeepa

That’s a plate

DewLeepa

Shartbreak feels good in a place like this

Grady

Recently met my friends wonderful French mother, and fifty years of smoking has given her full Tracy voice

hugomac

There is a 90s Mondo style 'documentary' called Montréal Clandestin that has a long sequence about gays eating piss-soaked baguettes from the urinal in the public toilet at the base of Mt. Royal. I saw it on a rented VHS in the early oughts. Can't find it online.

brucey

She's the Best is about James Charles

Alex G

Theres some great Madonna moaning sfx on her song with Tokischa “Hung up on Tokischa”

Kylee Kemlage

called out for being a progesterone fan (gay, boob guy)

Christ

if offered progesterone by a man in a van like candy i'd JUMP JUMP JUMP TO IT!!!!!

Garrett Young

i checked and nicole does indeed look 2

Lloyd

Emil, please never stop calling in. Thank you ❤️

Corey Faul

I love that the Selena Gomez impression is basically Poop Chute from Kill Drag Race up 🤣 💩

Dibi

Why can’t we all appreciate that Troyẽ Sivañé was trying to create a sexless version of Mickey Avalon’s So Rich, So Pretty for sex negative Gen Z and SUCCEEDED !!!

Pete Sweenis

Eagerly awaiting Theda’s final words on Jane Remover

charlie

Love wins

gay sully

I left a comment on the Ezra Klein podcast about how he mispronounces housing with an unvoiced S which to me comes across as extremely arrogant, and I think I was rightfully ripped to shreds by hundreds of people who accused me of embodying the main failings that have lead to the fall of American society. And I would do it again. Intervalic s is voiced!!!!!!!!!!

Meredith Gilbert

I had a dream a few weeks ago I hugged Theda, maybe it was prophetic!!! In my dream it WASNT CREEPY 😩

Trey C

so much skit from the girls lately. really got me grinning with my cock out😊

May

so matthew’s gf started transitioning 6 years ago and they’ve been together for 7? theda just saying “yeah…” over and over is the perfect response lmao i thought the call would never end

May

all the camels come out for a public affair

Henry

Parkeen my Volkswageeeen

Julia

Theda saying “torpedo tits.” Fucking hilarious

Henry

Avalon absolutely brings it. this song brings me back

Henry

Hahahahah

Joe B

I hail you for this. I hate Ezra Klein more than words can describe

Dibi

Penelope: The Spiritual Successor of Edible Ass Paint will return to Folsom

C

If you think about it trans men are like the bisexual cis woman with a boyfriend, of transgender

Bolkagirl

I needed to suck you to club me

Julie

eyeliner on her water butter dinner line

Grady

Please come to Folsom next month you GALS can stay at my apartment. Don’t worry about me I’m going to be living on the street FOLSOM STREET.

Noah

Wheel Lowndes

Nickerbockers

In this episode: Theda Hammel (38) and Macy Rodman (whom it is good to see) dive deep into all things scooped

Dibi

Me during dementia talking about how Selena Gomez and Charlotte Tilbury were always really kind and supportive

Henry

NY POST TODAY: “Biohacker Bryan Johnson reveals why he’s never slept with his longterm girlfriend — who he boasted is in ‘top 1% of all vaginas’”

Ross Leonardy

Now that gaga has gone from promoting melanotan implants to human skin AI research platforms funded by israel with Outer Bio will little monsters reflect on how they glazed michael polansky, a non-musician, for ... getting her to put out an album and put his name on the songwriting credits? I am ready to speak to her evil ways and the full history of her problematic behavior any time you need me to.

Runningstitch0

Sorry, Matt Perfect Illusion is the best song on Joanne. You’ve never seen someone thrash like that on a dirt road and you never will again.

M

“I just want a trace!”

Grady

Cocks out for Dolly

M

Omigod—did you do sketch in Club?

Isak

Keep that pussy fartin' for Parton

BungHole Liquors

Oh we are so back with this ep. We never left, but this was a good one gals

James Mitchell

Omg the Selina Gomez impersonation 😂😂😂

Christ

GADY LALA SKIN HARVESTER? yak jerky?

Bricka Tuna

-Been boon -Who’s there? -James -James who? -James Westbrook -That was frighteneeen!

Claudia

DON’T MAKE A JOKE OF IT, KEL!!

Syndicate Jingling

Im also confused why he looks like sam altman in the video

Freyja

My big conspiracy theory about the troye sivan song in addition to just hating it and thinking the trans girls in the video are shoed in is that he clearly thinks he’s doing an imitation of Self Esteem “I Do This All the Time” from like 2019 🫠🫠

Freyja

Also it’s LITERALLY JUST ABOUT CHARLI XCX I don’t understand the people tryna say it’s about trans women at all 😭

Blake ☭

Often 🙂‍↕️

Helena Shaheen

I deeply appreciate that macy and theda likely read no more than two sentences regarding the lindsay clancy case and just ran with it