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Skiagraphia XII (Patreon)

Published:
2015-03-18 06:17:26
Imported:
2026-10

Content

So finally there's a new chapter! Took a lot longer than I expected. As I explained in a note here and on tumblr, the bonus content won't be showing up until the very end of this month - that includes the alternate version (which is almost the entire chapter written completely differently), the comments version, and a PDF.It's probably pretty rough because it hasn't been betaed; sorry about any mistakes you might find!

Files

Skiagraphia XII

XII ] The ground gave way under my next step, sinking and sliding and pitching me forward. I stumbled and went to my hands and knees, sinking into hot shifting sand. Burning wind whipped grit up into my face and I threw an arm over my face, spitting sand out of my mouth.

Comments

Potatoe

Yay, new chapter! Alan says Jesus a lot. Does that translate at all, or does everyone just assume it's some weird untranslatable swear word?

Teromain

Haha, well, he's calming down from 'fuck' a little bit, which used to be his go-to word, just because of the reluctance of swearing with the clar and he feels variations of Jesus Christ are tamer. Which is fairly true; it doesn't translate at all since it's technically a name and names don't translate, but they hear it and can assume it's swearing...but it doesn't come off anywhere near as rude.

Potatoe

I'd just assume it was something even worse. Given how freely he uses other swear words, this mysterious word that doesn't translate is probably worse than anything their culture has to compare.

Teromain

Most of them are honestly going, "he keeps saying this name, what is this name, who is this? Probably someone from his weird foreigner world, let's just ignore it since it's not rude??" Keyd is under the assumption it's a real person Alan really hates /a lot/, and is sort of using their name as a joking curse, like the 'THANKS OBAMA' meme basically.

Potatoe

Hahaha. That's amazing. How do they even know it's a name, though?

Teromain

Since frequency does the gist of meanings, filler words or stuff that just /can't/ translate won't (like for example, they can't really hear Alan say 'dude' unless he actually is using it to describe a male person and not just throwing it into a sentence pointlessly), and so anything still heard through it untranslated is almost always a name or a title/rank. Sometimes also concepts or other things that cultures have no equivalents of, but since Alan uses this word exactly like he uses swear words that /do/ translate and this one doesn't translate, it's assumed to be a name.

moonshadows

Thank you!!! Ive been looking forward to this chapter :)

Potatoe

There's no reply button on your latest response, so I will respond to this one again instead. Will the way Alan speaks come across differently in the story from Keyd's POV because things translate slightly differently/don't translate?

Teromain

Yeah, it actually will! Also Keyd and Rysa's (and other people's) dialogue will be slightly different, just because most Isji words have nuances and frequency isn't going to get them across without making every sentence twice as long. It'll be interesting to try and get these differences across since obviously they should be entirely in another language, but I can't do that. :)

Potatoe

I was wondering about that too, but then I thought since you'd also be translating it to English as best you could in the same way frequency does it might not be so different. I'll be interested to see how you deal with it all. You certainly seem to have a handle on these sorts of things.

Teromain

Pfft now I can't reply to you either, thanks Patreon. But yeah there's definitely going to be some specific differences in what characters say; some of it will probably even make misunderstandings make more sense, as to what exactly they missed through translation and how they can't know what's not coming across.

Brianna

I suspected Aleif would come into play soon. But wow, they are at war yet the Worthies choose to mutiny and try to seize power.. Insanity! There's nothing like Alan and Rysa's relief at finding out Keyd was alive. Oh Darban you survived yet who knows what will happen to you in captivity. Did Kir get captured as well?

Kevin Wotipka

I love the idea of Ociir's whistle. How did you come up with it?

Teromain

Oh man, so long ago now that I don't remember exactly! It's always been the way that Rysa and Ociir have used to communicate/meet up but there was just never a way to mention it before this, although I'll probably figure out a way to drop a hint or clue in the rewrites since it feels little like a deus ex machina here despite me having the idea for like seven years, ahah. It might have been inspired a little bit by Ocarina of Time since my roommate played a lot of that game around the time I was coming up with this story.

Teromain

Yeah, the Worthies are being really, really stupid. Which is why Rhet is like 'ugh, bad timing seriously'. But they're scared, so...making very bad decisions. In the alternate version, which was the original version, Keyd basically shows up again right away and meets them there. Much less interesting or emotional for both Alan and Rysa, which is why it got changed. Darban and Kir (and Hahd) all got arrested. Darban can't physically be moved because of his injury, so he's just under arrest in the medical tent, but the other two are elsewhere.