Author's Note on Last Chapter (Patreon)

Hi all. I know the last chapter was pretty unpopular, so I do want to give you a chance to voice critiques. However, I would like to say a few things before the next chapter’s release, just to pull back the curtain and clear up a few items of inquiry:

“The next arc is going to be a loss of agency arc.”

First of all, these meetings aren’t going to be the focus of the next arc necessarily. It’s a twice a month side plot and narratively doubles as a consequence for getting caught and a way for Arielle to get information about the system. Her working with Father Jade is a temporary resolution, but it’s pretty clear that he is set up as a villain/challenge they will have to overcome by the end of the arc. Not everyone can be on Arielle’s side in this story, because it doesn’t make for a good story when every single villain is either working with her or is of no consequence to her. Arielle has pretty powerful allies. It only makes sense that she also has powerful enemies. 

Also, I’m not entirely sure how this is a loss of agency necessarily. ‘Loss of agency’ for me means slavery arcs, which I will absolutely never do, or mind control, which I will also never do. In stories, people often experience setbacks, are given unpleasant choices, and have to take one of them, until they can find a way out. It was forewarned in the earlier chapters that Arielle’s discovery would have major consequences. I don’t view a temporary setback and her making the choice to be compliant for now as a loss of agency. I view it as a setup for something else. Obviously, I don’t want to spoil the end, but I will just say Arielle isn’t one for total and complete compliance and she likes to poke at things she doesn't understand until she can figure them out.  

If there’s something else I’m missing that makes it feel like a loss of agency, please feel free to let me know. 

“Not enough information was revealed in these past two chapters.”

This might be fair. The two chapters were meant to tell us a little more about the system and its inner workings, as well as Arielle’s core and what makes it different from others. I feel like I make a lot of assumptions in my head (like with those earlier chapters about the system haha), and I forget that readers don’t know what I do, so I tend to share too little. It’s also hard to know what I’ve made obvious and what is only like a hint that I never confirmed, so I end up reiterating a lot of things readers might already know and missing out on what they might not. In that vein, I’d like to know the things that weren’t clear, so maybe I can go back and add them in with asterisks, if they were meant to be revealed at this time.  

All that being said, I do want to hear from you. Once again, if there’s something else I’m missing that makes the chapters unpleasant, and you’re concerned it might be repeated, I’d like to hear it. Although I have a general storyline in my head, I don’t want to write something readers aren’t enjoying, so I do alter based on feedback as long as the general message and throughline are still intact.

Thanks for reading!