New Song: "Kristi Noem" (Patreon)

There have been a few slight lyrical revisions since I posted this the other day, all in the service of making it easier to sing... or making it match the original lyrics better.

Kristi Noem just shot her hunting dog,Kristi Noem just shot her hunting dog,

Donald, can I come over after your speech?(After your speech)We can talk about fighting covid with bleach(Inject that bleach)Did your lawyers get back from their deposition (Their deposition)Trying to break the constitution, what a position 

Now I know that you're auditioning who might be veep,But I think that you should know, I’m not some ordinary creep....

Kristi Noem just shot her hunting dog,A fourteen month old pup, who got hunting wrongThen she went and smote the family's pet goat,Responsible and calm, that's how she killed them, Kristi Noem.

The Republican Party is a bit insane(A bit insane)They approve of things most people would disdain(Something wrong in the brain)But even for them, there's crossing a line(Crossing a line)And I’m  pretty sure they don't believe poochicide is fine

Starting with the Odyssey, books have had man’s best friend,Does she know Old Yeller doesn't have a happy end?

Kristi Noem just shot her hunting dog,She supports Trump's agenda and really wants a jobKristi, can't you see you’ve offended everybody,We all think that it's wrong, why did you do it, Kristi Noem?

Kristi Noem just shot her hunting dog,Did she never know that killing pets is wrong?The John Wick film franchise tells us how to stop these guys --Pet killers don't last long, especially in politics 

Kristi Noem just shot her hunting dog,She’s no leader, she's just a demagogue Kristi, can't you see your career is history,Your new book is a bomb, you're just a loser, Kristi Noem.

Music: "Stacy's Mom" by Chris Collingwood & Alan Schlesinger