New Song: "Gluten Free" (Patreon)

This is inspired by a meme that's been around for awhile. For more info, visit https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/everyone-must-enjoy-this-modern-rice .

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

I saw a meme on a Facebook page,

It filled me with hope and love and rage,

You know how some say “copy and paste

If you care, please share, don't embrace disgrace.”

Well, usually I’ll just scroll right by,

But something about this caught my eye

It looked darn tasty, I can't deny,

But the thing was, every single reply was --

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Now, I like rice, and I like memes,

But don't usually take them to extremes.

Sometimes noodles hit the spot,

Oodles of zoodles, whatever you’ve got.

But this was like a hypnotic trance,

No way to avoid it, not a chance.

Before I knew it, I’d made my stance

And took my place in the zombie dance, saying --

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Humanity has advanced so far

Since cavemen wondered what was a star.

Vaccines, spliced genes, rockets to the moon,

Who knows what else is coming soon?

But I think our phones have ruined our dreams,

Instead of personal assistant themes,

There are cats, and puppies, and political screams,

And thousands of us reposting memes, like --

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice. (End w/ minor chord)

Oh, I’ll try -- stir-fry....

I’m gonna enjoy some

(Modern rice) long and fluffy,

(Modern rice) short and puffy

(Modern rice) get me chicken, grilled gai yang....

(Grilled gai yang) marinated

(Grilled gai yang) spatchcocked, ate it

(Grilled gai yang) or I’ll just have goong pad nam....

(Goong pad nam*) shrimp with chile

(Goong pad nam) not hot, really

(Goong pad nam) serve it on some modern rice....

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone (everyone), everyone (everyone),

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Everyone must enjoy this modern rice.

Includes a small musical quote from "Modern Love" by David Bowie